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The Bittlemores: A Novel
A heartfelt, comic, and deeply satisfying debut novel from the #1 bestselling author, singer-songwriter, member of Canada's Music Hall of Fame and star of her own hit TV sitcom. A little bit All Creatures Great and Small , a little bit Fargo and all Jann Arden!
On mean Harp Bittlemore’s blighted farm, hidden away in the Backhills, nothing has gone right for a very long time. Crops don’t grow, the pigs and chickens stay skinny and the three aged dairy cows, Berle, Crilla and Dally, are so desperate they are plotting an escape. The one thing holding them back is the thought of abandoning young Willa, the single bright point in their life since her older sister, Margaret, ran away.
But Willa Bittlemore, just turning 14, is planning her own rebellion. Something doesn’t add up in the story she’s been told about her missing sister, and she's beginning to question if her horrible parents are even her parents at all. Just as things are really coming to a head, a bright young police officer starts investigating a cold case involving a baby stolen from a little rural hospital 28 years earlier, and Willa and the cows find out exactly how far the Bittlemores will go to protect a festering secret.
Written with Jann’s trademark outrageous humour and full of her down-to-earth wisdom, The Bittlemores is a rural fairytale, a coming-of-age story and a prairie mystery all-in-one, saturated with her observations of the world she grew up in and her deep connection to the animals we exploit. This marvel of a first novel digs into how people come to be so cruel, but it also glories in the miracle of human kindness.
On mean Harp Bittlemore’s blighted farm, hidden away in the Backhills, nothing has gone right for a very long time. Crops don’t grow, the pigs and chickens stay skinny and the three aged dairy cows, Berle, Crilla and Dally, are so desperate they are plotting an escape. The one thing holding them back is the thought of abandoning young Willa, the single bright point in their life since her older sister, Margaret, ran away.
But Willa Bittlemore, just turning 14, is planning her own rebellion. Something doesn’t add up in the story she’s been told about her missing sister, and she's beginning to question if her horrible parents are even her parents at all. Just as things are really coming to a head, a bright young police officer starts investigating a cold case involving a baby stolen from a little rural hospital 28 years earlier, and Willa and the cows find out exactly how far the Bittlemores will go to protect a festering secret.
Written with Jann’s trademark outrageous humour and full of her down-to-earth wisdom, The Bittlemores is a rural fairytale, a coming-of-age story and a prairie mystery all-in-one, saturated with her observations of the world she grew up in and her deep connection to the animals we exploit. This marvel of a first novel digs into how people come to be so cruel, but it also glories in the miracle of human kindness.
384 pages, Hardcover
First published November 7, 2023
173 people are currently reading
4124 people want to read
About the author
Jann Arden
28 books277 followersJann Arden is a Canadian born, singer, songwriter, broadcaster and author. The much-celebrated multi-platinum award-winning artist catapulted onto the Canadian music scene in 1993 with the release of her debut album “Time For Mercy” featuring the hit single, “I Would Die For You”. A year later with “Living Under June”, she would have her career breakout hit, “Insensitive” that would solidify her position in the music world.
On April 2nd, 2019 Arden released the paperback version of the Canadian best seller “Feeding My Mother – Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen as My Mom Lives with Memory Loss” (Penguin Random House Canada). The book shares insights, loss, irony, and yes humour, as mother and daughter face the journey together. The hardcover book spent 21 consecutive weeks on the Globe & Mail bestseller lists.
Whether she is captivating audiences with her heartfelt music, entertaining them with her quick wit or sharing her written word in a boldly honest voice – Jann Arden is a Canadian original – a brilliant multi-dimensional talent!
On April 2nd, 2019 Arden released the paperback version of the Canadian best seller “Feeding My Mother – Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen as My Mom Lives with Memory Loss” (Penguin Random House Canada). The book shares insights, loss, irony, and yes humour, as mother and daughter face the journey together. The hardcover book spent 21 consecutive weeks on the Globe & Mail bestseller lists.
Whether she is captivating audiences with her heartfelt music, entertaining them with her quick wit or sharing her written word in a boldly honest voice – Jann Arden is a Canadian original – a brilliant multi-dimensional talent!
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 674 reviews
March 3, 2024
Warning: some very uncomfortable, disturbing themes. If the reader pushes through these parts, they will be amply rewarded! This is the story of three generations of a dysfunctional family living on a rundown farm. It is part mystery, a coming-of-age story exploring abhorrent behaviour but remembering goodness and kindness. Most females, including the cattle, are examples of resilience, tenacity, and strength. There are uncomfortable descriptions of animal cruelty, psychological child abuse, kidnapping, alcoholism, and uncontrollable rage. I would previously skip these sections or not finish the book, but the genius of the writing made the story most compelling, and I couldn't turn the pages quickly enough. This book will be high on my list of favourites for 2023.
The Bittlemore farm is in a sad state of repairs due to Mr. Bittlemore's laziness and continuous drunken state. The only remaining animals are three cows, three pigs, a few chickens, and the Orange Cat, who has been badly mistreated and hides from the older Bittlemores. Mr. Bittlemore's greatest joys in life are the pleasure of torturing his livestock and falling into befuddled states from excessive liquor.
The cows plan to run away along the gravel road and hitch a drive in a large vehicle to take them to a safe destination. The Orange cat stays hidden on the farm with plans to kill Mr. Bittlemore.
Mrs. Bittlemore bakes obsessively but does not enjoy food. She has become obese while her husband overeats her baking but remains scrawny. Mrs. Bittlemore does not fear her husband but puts up with his behaviour and meanness. She is not afraid to talk back to his insults, but she should be. She has participated in much of his terrible behaviour and is becoming increasingly unhinged and dangerous.
They have raised two girls to the age of fourteen. The eldest, Margaret, ran away, was befriended by a kindly lady trucker, and has never returned home. The younger girl, Willa, now fourteen, is having serious doubts about belonging to such obnoxious parents. She has stayed to protect the farm animals. She has confided her suspicions to her best friend and schoolmate and her doubts and unhappiness to a school teacher.
Mr. Bittlemore has gone on a rampage with his gun. He already had enjoyed killing a neighbour's dog and is now aiming to shoot the cows, pigs, and cat when he finds where it is hiding. A new female police officer has been assigned to look into cold cases. She is interested in the unsolved case of a newborn baby stolen from the hospital twenty-nine years earlier.
The story builds to a crescendo on this day amid Mr. Bittlemore's drunken rage. Margaret returns to the farm for the first time since she ran away, accompanied by the lady trucker. Willa and her friend are nearby, frantic about the doomed animals. Willa's school teacher arrives. She is troubled by what Willa confessed about her home life and her suspicions, but surely she was exaggerating. The teacher ends up badly injured, and so does Mrs. Bittlemore, who is wounded by accident. The cows try to hide while protecting the pigs, the Orange cat, and her new kittens. The female police officer arrives late after the mob has heard confessions and secrets.
This is a very impressive debut novel by Canadian icon and renowned singer-songwriter Jann Arden. It contains a lot of heart, goodness, hope, and suspense. It is beautifully written and, against all expectations, has a satisfying ending. The cover is eye-catching, and tiny drawings proceed each chapter. Recommended!
The Bittlemore farm is in a sad state of repairs due to Mr. Bittlemore's laziness and continuous drunken state. The only remaining animals are three cows, three pigs, a few chickens, and the Orange Cat, who has been badly mistreated and hides from the older Bittlemores. Mr. Bittlemore's greatest joys in life are the pleasure of torturing his livestock and falling into befuddled states from excessive liquor.
The cows plan to run away along the gravel road and hitch a drive in a large vehicle to take them to a safe destination. The Orange cat stays hidden on the farm with plans to kill Mr. Bittlemore.
Mrs. Bittlemore bakes obsessively but does not enjoy food. She has become obese while her husband overeats her baking but remains scrawny. Mrs. Bittlemore does not fear her husband but puts up with his behaviour and meanness. She is not afraid to talk back to his insults, but she should be. She has participated in much of his terrible behaviour and is becoming increasingly unhinged and dangerous.
They have raised two girls to the age of fourteen. The eldest, Margaret, ran away, was befriended by a kindly lady trucker, and has never returned home. The younger girl, Willa, now fourteen, is having serious doubts about belonging to such obnoxious parents. She has stayed to protect the farm animals. She has confided her suspicions to her best friend and schoolmate and her doubts and unhappiness to a school teacher.
Mr. Bittlemore has gone on a rampage with his gun. He already had enjoyed killing a neighbour's dog and is now aiming to shoot the cows, pigs, and cat when he finds where it is hiding. A new female police officer has been assigned to look into cold cases. She is interested in the unsolved case of a newborn baby stolen from the hospital twenty-nine years earlier.
The story builds to a crescendo on this day amid Mr. Bittlemore's drunken rage. Margaret returns to the farm for the first time since she ran away, accompanied by the lady trucker. Willa and her friend are nearby, frantic about the doomed animals. Willa's school teacher arrives. She is troubled by what Willa confessed about her home life and her suspicions, but surely she was exaggerating. The teacher ends up badly injured, and so does Mrs. Bittlemore, who is wounded by accident. The cows try to hide while protecting the pigs, the Orange cat, and her new kittens. The female police officer arrives late after the mob has heard confessions and secrets.
This is a very impressive debut novel by Canadian icon and renowned singer-songwriter Jann Arden. It contains a lot of heart, goodness, hope, and suspense. It is beautifully written and, against all expectations, has a satisfying ending. The cover is eye-catching, and tiny drawings proceed each chapter. Recommended!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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November 16, 2023I'm not going to give this a star rating because my thoughts about this novel are all over the place.
It's well-written. The characters are memorable. I love coming-of-age stories and expect hardships in all of them, as growing up is never easy, and there is plenty of hardship here.
The book blurb says, "heartfelt and comic," but I don't agree. This novel has some very dark moments and I struggled to push past them. I rarely struggle with violence in fiction and am a fan of gritty reads. I read horror, mystery, thriller, lit fic—all of it—but this novel's animal abuse was too much for me.
The ending is heartfelt and satisfying, and I love how a group of women save the day, but the ending wasn't powerful enough to wash away the descriptions of abuse.
It's well-written. The characters are memorable. I love coming-of-age stories and expect hardships in all of them, as growing up is never easy, and there is plenty of hardship here.
The book blurb says, "heartfelt and comic," but I don't agree. This novel has some very dark moments and I struggled to push past them. I rarely struggle with violence in fiction and am a fan of gritty reads. I read horror, mystery, thriller, lit fic—all of it—but this novel's animal abuse was too much for me.
The ending is heartfelt and satisfying, and I love how a group of women save the day, but the ending wasn't powerful enough to wash away the descriptions of abuse.
October 31, 2023
Tough themes here...child abuse and animal abuse...but worth pushing through for the story.
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November 23, 2023DNF This has been a big disappointment. I have read everything Jann Arden has written and enjoyed her humor and compassion. The Bittlemores is a work of fiction and after the first ten chapters I found I was uncomfortable with the ongoing abuse of animals and humans.
September 27, 2024
3.5 Stars
This story was a bit hard to read at first. The abuse that the animals endured was horrible. Once you get past that, the story takes off. I found myself excited to see if the kids and the animals finally get their retribution in the end.
This story was a bit hard to read at first. The abuse that the animals endured was horrible. Once you get past that, the story takes off. I found myself excited to see if the kids and the animals finally get their retribution in the end.
January 11, 2024
A lot of the negative reviews are because of the extremely graphic depictions of animal abuse and cruelty. It is absolutely there, but that's not why I consider this to be a not so good book. Horror and extreme horror novels are my favourite genres, so that didn't bother me - but if that is something that bothers you, be warned.
I considered this a not so good book because it was blah. It was not marketed the way it should have been. The quirky animal POV was not used to it's potential in my opinion. It's not a cozy mystery. There is no mystery. You know the players and what happened, you just need to follow the story. It's more of a rural domestic thriller than anything - and not a very good one.
I'm pretty surprised that a lot of the positive reviews talk about the prose of this novel. I wouldn't say it's particularly well written at all. It was really saccharine and I thought the use of literary devices were kind of distracting coming from the thoughts of the 14 year old protagonist. She talks about not yet having her period and articulates herself strikingly poetically and lyrically for a profoundly abused and neglected child.
And oh my god if I had to hear about how far Mrs. Bittlemore was one more time. Holy goodness gracious. It isn't offensive to me, it is just so annoying and repetitive that it became a little meme in my head when I read. Every single page where she was mentioned, how massive and fat and sweaty and gross and chubby and rotund and round and blobby she was had to be stated again. Like I'm talking "she fatted fatly about the house, her giant breasts breaking everything in their path". It would have been hilarious if I hadn't been simultaneously so annoyed.
Having the police officer's POV was pretty useless and didn't move much forward. The workings of the main conflict were in the process of solving themselves when the officer literally shows up randomly. The bullying subplot was irrelevant and didn't tell us much about anyone involved. It was another thing that just made the book slower and slower.
The only thing I enjoyed was the battle between the farm animals and Harp. Loved their weird interactions and their seething hatred for each other. Could have been a cool story if we were in this weird world of sentient cows and pigs taking revenge on an evil farmer. But no. We need a domestic thriller and kidnapping main plot apparently. 😢
Yeah I was really excited about this book. And it really was disappointing.
I considered this a not so good book because it was blah. It was not marketed the way it should have been. The quirky animal POV was not used to it's potential in my opinion. It's not a cozy mystery. There is no mystery. You know the players and what happened, you just need to follow the story. It's more of a rural domestic thriller than anything - and not a very good one.
I'm pretty surprised that a lot of the positive reviews talk about the prose of this novel. I wouldn't say it's particularly well written at all. It was really saccharine and I thought the use of literary devices were kind of distracting coming from the thoughts of the 14 year old protagonist. She talks about not yet having her period and articulates herself strikingly poetically and lyrically for a profoundly abused and neglected child.
And oh my god if I had to hear about how far Mrs. Bittlemore was one more time. Holy goodness gracious. It isn't offensive to me, it is just so annoying and repetitive that it became a little meme in my head when I read. Every single page where she was mentioned, how massive and fat and sweaty and gross and chubby and rotund and round and blobby she was had to be stated again. Like I'm talking "she fatted fatly about the house, her giant breasts breaking everything in their path". It would have been hilarious if I hadn't been simultaneously so annoyed.
Having the police officer's POV was pretty useless and didn't move much forward. The workings of the main conflict were in the process of solving themselves when the officer literally shows up randomly. The bullying subplot was irrelevant and didn't tell us much about anyone involved. It was another thing that just made the book slower and slower.
The only thing I enjoyed was the battle between the farm animals and Harp. Loved their weird interactions and their seething hatred for each other. Could have been a cool story if we were in this weird world of sentient cows and pigs taking revenge on an evil farmer. But no. We need a domestic thriller and kidnapping main plot apparently. 😢
Yeah I was really excited about this book. And it really was disappointing.
November 7, 2023
What an IMPRESSIVE fiction debut from Canadian icon Jann Arden! I was actually quite blown away by how compelling and unputdownable this genre-defying rural domestic family drama was! Told through alternating POVs this story is part mystery, part coming of age tale about three generations of a very dysfunctional family.
It starts off a bit dark, set on a run down farm with a cruel farmer who brutally treats his animals, his wife and his young daughter who herself is badly mistreated. If you can swallow down the dark bits, there is also a great deal of humor, heart, spunky animals and a wide cast of characters you won't help but be able to root for as the truth behind a kidnapping years ago slowly comes to light in the books' final pulse-pounding chapters!
The farm animals play a prominent role in this story and some of my favorite scenes were the ones from their perspectives or that highlighted their insidious acts of vengeance. Great on audio narrated by the author herself with a moving note about just how long she worked on this book and what a labor of love it was to create.
Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital copy in exchange for my honest review! I truly enjoyed every minute of this book and will be recommending it highly as one of my favorites of the year!
⚠️CW: animal cruelty, child abuse, kidnapping, alcoholism, food addiction, teen pregnancy
It starts off a bit dark, set on a run down farm with a cruel farmer who brutally treats his animals, his wife and his young daughter who herself is badly mistreated. If you can swallow down the dark bits, there is also a great deal of humor, heart, spunky animals and a wide cast of characters you won't help but be able to root for as the truth behind a kidnapping years ago slowly comes to light in the books' final pulse-pounding chapters!
The farm animals play a prominent role in this story and some of my favorite scenes were the ones from their perspectives or that highlighted their insidious acts of vengeance. Great on audio narrated by the author herself with a moving note about just how long she worked on this book and what a labor of love it was to create.
Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital copy in exchange for my honest review! I truly enjoyed every minute of this book and will be recommending it highly as one of my favorites of the year!
⚠️CW: animal cruelty, child abuse, kidnapping, alcoholism, food addiction, teen pregnancy
January 8, 2024
Oh, Jann Arden you are a wonderful story teller!
Growing up in Small Town Ontario, I went to school with Carols. I was bullied by Noras and their posses. I had teachers like Ms. Bevin. I worked with Bev Oldmans. And I rode the school bus with kids who lived like the Bittlemores.
Many times I laughed out loud. I think Charlotte’s Web” and “Annabelle’s Wish” snuck into the pages.
There are many things happening in this story that are all tied up quite nicely in the last few chapters. But unlike other books I have read, with many plots happening at once, these story lines are easy to follow. They make the story what it is.
Other reviewers/readers were upset with the child and animal abuse aspect. Some could not finish the book. These are the reality of then( and now) in many parts of rural areas. If I want fantasy, I will read a romance.
In the end. I am sad the story was over.
Please, Ms. Arden, write us another.
Growing up in Small Town Ontario, I went to school with Carols. I was bullied by Noras and their posses. I had teachers like Ms. Bevin. I worked with Bev Oldmans. And I rode the school bus with kids who lived like the Bittlemores.
Many times I laughed out loud. I think Charlotte’s Web” and “Annabelle’s Wish” snuck into the pages.
There are many things happening in this story that are all tied up quite nicely in the last few chapters. But unlike other books I have read, with many plots happening at once, these story lines are easy to follow. They make the story what it is.
Other reviewers/readers were upset with the child and animal abuse aspect. Some could not finish the book. These are the reality of then( and now) in many parts of rural areas. If I want fantasy, I will read a romance.
In the end. I am sad the story was over.
Please, Ms. Arden, write us another.
December 30, 2023
Couldn't put this down! It was like Roald Dahl's "The Twits" mixed with "Charlotte's Web" all tied together in a Nancy Drew mystery. There are definitely some disturbing descriptions of animal cruelty and emotional abuse, but it is a crucial part of the story.
March 23, 2024
This reminded me of an adult fairytale. It read similarly with extreme OTT bad vs. good characters and plot elements. A trigger warning of animal abuse should be noted.
The Bittlemores are a nasty couple who own a farm and desperately want a baby. Mrs. Bittlemore is unable to have her own child. The two hatch a plan to steal a baby from the hospital, which they pull off successfully. Fast forward to Margaret Bittlemore, at 14 years old, who is bitterly unhappy. She devises a plan to get pregnant with hopes of escaping her home prison. After giving birth to a little girl, she runs away, leaving her daughter Willa with the Bittlemores. The story is mostly about Willa and her life with the Bittlemores.
As mentioned, this was like a Cinderella story, with talking animals included. My favorite parts were the cows and their plotting. Overall, though, the story was a bit too one note for me. It lacked emotional depth because of the OTT plot elements. It was difficult to really connect with the characters at a deeper level.
The audiobook was read by the author, which again didn't really work for me. Although her performance was animated, it made the book feel almost caricature- like; kind of like comedy mixed with irony, which only added to the emotional disconnect. Just a so-so read for me.
The Bittlemores are a nasty couple who own a farm and desperately want a baby. Mrs. Bittlemore is unable to have her own child. The two hatch a plan to steal a baby from the hospital, which they pull off successfully. Fast forward to Margaret Bittlemore, at 14 years old, who is bitterly unhappy. She devises a plan to get pregnant with hopes of escaping her home prison. After giving birth to a little girl, she runs away, leaving her daughter Willa with the Bittlemores. The story is mostly about Willa and her life with the Bittlemores.
As mentioned, this was like a Cinderella story, with talking animals included. My favorite parts were the cows and their plotting. Overall, though, the story was a bit too one note for me. It lacked emotional depth because of the OTT plot elements. It was difficult to really connect with the characters at a deeper level.
The audiobook was read by the author, which again didn't really work for me. Although her performance was animated, it made the book feel almost caricature- like; kind of like comedy mixed with irony, which only added to the emotional disconnect. Just a so-so read for me.
January 11, 2024
I wasn’t sure what I was reading at first-talking cows? I wasn’t sure if I had wasted my book budget or not. I definitely did not!
Even with some of the darker parts of the book, the lighter and happier ones made up for it!
Even with some of the darker parts of the book, the lighter and happier ones made up for it!
November 8, 2023
Jann Arden is, without a doubt, a natural storyteller and this shines through in her first novel. If you can make it through some of the dark topics present in the book (including child and animal abuse), you'll see that The Bittlemores is also full of female characters that show power, tenacity, and strength through some major struggles. And yes, some of these strong females are indeed cows, which does add some fun and levity to help balance some of the heaviness 🐄 The final few chapters of the book I couldn't get through quickly enough - the suspense was killing me! I do think the description of the book needs to be reconsidered. It is certainly not as light as the description makes it sound, and that may cause challenges for readers and create expectations that don't accurately reflect the book's (incredible) content.
November 30, 2023
DNF. Abandoned at page ninety. A total waste of the paper it was printed on, and of the time I spent reading it. Having read the author’s previous book Feeding My Mother, which I enjoyed, I can hardly believe this was written by the same person. The continuous graphic descriptions of inconceivable cruelty and violence towards animals and children alike made me sick. I don’t get it. Even to think up these hideous acts and then actually write them down, just makes me question the state of Ms.Arden’s mental health. Very sad. What’s really crazy, is that this is classified as a “coming of age/cozy mystery” on the back cover, above the ISBN! The worst book I’ve attempted to read this year! Very disappointed.
May 8, 2024
Orange cat forever!! 🐈 Very interesting emotional story! 3.5 stars!
June 19, 2025
I think Jann Arden is hilariously funny in concert and on TV. I’ve enjoyed her humour in a couple of her memoirs.
This book was marketed as a hilariously funny mystery. But I didn’t find it funny at all. It was an ok story, while dark, and very absurd at times. But not funny. There also wasn’t a mystery - well there was for the main character Willa, but not for the reader who is let in on everything from the start.
I could’ve done without the talking/spelling animals too. It felt juvenile and poorly done.
This book was marketed as a hilariously funny mystery. But I didn’t find it funny at all. It was an ok story, while dark, and very absurd at times. But not funny. There also wasn’t a mystery - well there was for the main character Willa, but not for the reader who is let in on everything from the start.
I could’ve done without the talking/spelling animals too. It felt juvenile and poorly done.
October 14, 2023
This is an interesting, well-written story - but not for the faint of heart. There is animal cruelty, nasty people, kidnapping, and child abuse. I was somewhat stressed out reading it. But there were moments of light and love. The ending brought my review up from 4 to 5 stars.
July 22, 2024
It was not what I expected but had humour (talking cows who can write!?), some of the darkness of humanity, and an ending I found very satisfying. It was a happy ending so don’t worry about that. It was very well written.
February 21, 2025
I'm a longtime Jann fan and have been so looking forward to this book since it came out. This is just the time of year for a lighthearted, fun distraction and this was going to be perfect. And it pretty much was until I got to the talking cows - um, no thank you, that does not compute - and then a rousing volley of descriptive animal torture. So I'm out and so is the book, into the compost heap. 2 stars - one for the writing and one because Canadian, eh.
January 11, 2024
Fantastic read. Jann Arden is both witty and thoughtful in telling this story.
dnf
July 28, 2023DNF after about 80 pages so not rating. However, I think the marketing for this book and blurbs on the back of the ARC I received are way off track and misleading. I went into this thinking “rural fairytale”, “heartfelt, comic and deeply satisfying”, and “cozy mystery”… but the first 80 pages is detailed animal torture scenes and talk of killing animals and also child abuse. As someone who reads horror, I’m not usually very squeamish, but some of the things described were pretty off putting and disturbing. Not very “cozy” or “comic” to me. You do get moments from the animals perspectives also which is just experiencing the immense torture scenes through their pain. I was going to try to push through for a hopeful revenge arc or something but tbh the mystery portion is a very common trope used (which is one I enjoy and partially why I requested this) but it’s announced to the reader at the beginning with not a lot of buy in or build up created and I decided that I didn’t want to sit through anymore animal torture scenes to get there.
Perspective does jump around a lot with not much warning or demarcation for who’s head you’re in and it will switch within chapters too.
Perspective does jump around a lot with not much warning or demarcation for who’s head you’re in and it will switch within chapters too.
July 7, 2024
My Rating: 4.25/5
I did a hybrid read of this book but ended up doing more audio than physical reading as I felt Jann Arden narrated her own book really well.
I was a tad unsure about this book when I first started it, as it felt heavy and depressing. The animal abuse by the miserable farmer is also very upsetting so consider that a trigger warning.
The story turned a corner about 20% of the way through and I really liked the talking animals (Charlotte's Web-esque) and "Roald Dahl for adults" vibe (thank you to my fellow book loving friend Tina for that comparison as she was right).
Jann is a very good storyteller. This book had a little mystery to it and ultimately a lot of heart when it comes to family.
I did a hybrid read of this book but ended up doing more audio than physical reading as I felt Jann Arden narrated her own book really well.
I was a tad unsure about this book when I first started it, as it felt heavy and depressing. The animal abuse by the miserable farmer is also very upsetting so consider that a trigger warning.
The story turned a corner about 20% of the way through and I really liked the talking animals (Charlotte's Web-esque) and "Roald Dahl for adults" vibe (thank you to my fellow book loving friend Tina for that comparison as she was right).
Jann is a very good storyteller. This book had a little mystery to it and ultimately a lot of heart when it comes to family.
December 27, 2023
I'm glad I didn't listen to the couple of reviews I initially read before I started reading. I was hooked to the story a few pages in. The book reminded me of Animal Farm, without the Communist undertone/references. I enjoyed the shifting narrative perspectives.
January 17, 2024
So.much.animal.abuse
March 19, 2025
The first half of this novel is pure misery: child abuse and animal cruelty. It is so heavy. The story does get better in the second half, and there are some light moments with the talking cows (who can spell messages by the way). The storyline is fine, but it did remind me a lot of the Annie movie, the tone is very exaggerated and caricatured. I would have given it a generous three stars.
But I took one off for the constant references to how fat Mrs. Bittlemore is.
And I took off another star for the excessive (I lost count) mentions of shit (and crap, poop, farts) and all the profanity.
Jann Arden is a beloved Canadian singer-songwriter, and I’m sorry that this is the first book of hers that I read. I may still read her memoirs at some point.
But I took one off for the constant references to how fat Mrs. Bittlemore is.
And I took off another star for the excessive (I lost count) mentions of shit (and crap, poop, farts) and all the profanity.
Jann Arden is a beloved Canadian singer-songwriter, and I’m sorry that this is the first book of hers that I read. I may still read her memoirs at some point.
February 6, 2024
CW: animal abuse, child abuse, neglect, substance abuse and some physical violence.
A book I couldn’t put down. Though it was tough in the beginning due to the animal abuse, this book will be stuck in my mind for many years to come. I quickly fell in love with the book and the well developed characters.
Now I want to have some cows of my own LOL
A book I couldn’t put down. Though it was tough in the beginning due to the animal abuse, this book will be stuck in my mind for many years to come. I quickly fell in love with the book and the well developed characters.
Now I want to have some cows of my own LOL
March 20, 2024
This was almost a DNF for me. The animal abuse at the beginning was really hard to read. I persevered on (mostly because it was my book clubs monthly book pick). The story was really good. So happy I kept reading as it all came together and I ended up loving the book! PS spoiler alert the animals end up with a great home in the end💗
August 16, 2025
It took me over a year to finish but ultimately it was worth it. Put it aside after the first 150 pages. When I finally decided to get it off my bedside table it got better. Not as funny as you’d hope from the author.
March 18, 2024
Very dark, slivers of humour, but this isn’t a funny Jann book.
September 4, 2024
[Audiobook]
Narrator: 3.5
Story: 3.5
Narrator: 3.5
Story: 3.5
July 17, 2024
4.5 stars!
This book had a little of everything - a fairy tale feel with some magical realism thrown in, a mystery, characters who you love and some you really hate. Some things were so over the top you couldn't help but laugh and some broke your heart with the what-could-have beens.
And an ending that ties it all up nicely.
Oh, and talking animals. Who doesn't need some talking (and a little murderous) cows?
This book had a little of everything - a fairy tale feel with some magical realism thrown in, a mystery, characters who you love and some you really hate. Some things were so over the top you couldn't help but laugh and some broke your heart with the what-could-have beens.
And an ending that ties it all up nicely.
Oh, and talking animals. Who doesn't need some talking (and a little murderous) cows?
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