Island Wife: Living on the Edge of the Wild

by Judy Fairbairns

Dream of living on a remote Scottish island? ISLAND WIFE tells one woman's true life story from 19-year-old bride to mother of five, running a family hotel a recording studio and a whale watching business. By turns unflinching, moving and very funny, this is a memoir of a 40 year marriage and a woman's extraordinary life.

'A hugely entertaining story of family travails and triumphs' KIRSTY WARK
'A sensitive, brave and honest look at a life lived in the wake of others' needs' DAILY MAIL

Judy, at 19, met her future husband, who whisked her off into an adventure, a marriage of over forty years, and a life on a remote Hebridean island. Along the way she bears five children, learns how to run a rocky hill farm, a hotel, a recording studio and the first whale watching business in the UK - all the while inventively making fraying ends meet. When her children start to leave home, things fall apart and there is sadness and joy in how she puts things back together.

Funny and tender, this is a book of endless horizons and a breath of fresh air. It is also the story of a creative woman coming out from under and finding her true self.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Biography, Scotland, Autobiography, Family

348 pages, Hardcover

First published March 1, 2013

Reviews

[Diane · Rating 2 out of 5]

A friend bought this book while on a hiking trip in the Outer Hebrides. It is the personal story of a woman who lived on a small island while running a bed and breakfast and raising five children. It was written as part of a women’s consciousness-raising project and reads just like what it is. I could identify with some of the author’s issues which were issues most women my age had to deal with - such as feeling invisible and dismissed – but the style was overly breathless. At the end of the book her newly conscious self is really obnoxious.

I preferred the historical non-fiction (from the same hiking trip) “Island of Wings” set on St. Kildas in the 19th century.

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

So much more than I expected. A life story brought to life with interesting aspects. Happy and sad, through thick and thin. Don't be put off by it being someone's life story on a hebridean island. Go on, give it a try.

[Brie · Rating 3 out of 5]

In some ways this was a fascinating read as I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to raise 5 kids and run an estate on an island in Scotland. But in other ways it was frustrating as Judy put up with so much shit and unhappiness from her husband. Other than their quick courtship, I failed to see the love between them and I think the story could have benefited from a bit more depth to their relationship.

I also would have loved to have had a timeline. What year was it?? She rarely even gave her children’s ages during the book so I found it really difficult to relate as a fellow mom at times as I couldn’t always place milestones. Plus life on the estate was borderline barbaric at times (hot water only once a week?!) so sometimes it felt like I was reading a story set in the early 1900s lol.

Anyway, I did enjoy the book and the ending made it worthwhile when Judy finally grew a pair and found herself.

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this book. What a journey to share. It is moving and comical in equal amounts.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought this book on holiday on the Isle of Mull as it was under local interest. It was lovely to read about island life on holiday. I came home still reading the book and at first I thought it lost its magic not being read on a Scottish island but the magic returned.
Judy writes of many hard times and difficult patches which I think people could relate to even without living on a remote island.

[Anna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I borrowed this book mistakingly thinking it was set in the New Hebrides. It is actually set in The Hebrides which seem to be islands off Scotland. The story has a twist at the end which I found interesting however it is a part of the world which unfortunately has little appeal to me personally.

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

I bought this book after confirming with the seller that Judy's story is from the Isle of xxx, where my husband and I love to vacation. I have long wondered how the islanders live, since we are mere tourists who can enjoy every moment and all weathers because we are on vacation. Apparently the publisher wouldn't let Judy give the name of the island or be clear about where it was, in order to make the book more widely appealing to visitors and natives of other Hebridean islands.

I started reading because I love the island, but I quickly found myself captivated by Judy's and her family's story and how they navigated through their challenges. She seems honest and realistic; she doesn't sugar-coat anything and she shows how she was affected and inspired by those she met. Her tales and descriptions of her children and the animals are at times amusing and at times sad. I thoroughly enjoyed this peek into life on this rugged island.

[Jayne Gray · Rating 3 out of 5]

An uncomfortable read

I struggled with this book. It is well written, but for the majority of it it felt like watching someone make a series of ill advised mistakes. I disliked the husband and was sick and scunnerred with the author.

It was interesting though, and a very honest account of her life and her frequent depression. Without giving too much away they do both finally sort themselves out a bit, but from the book I'm still not quite clear how that really happens.

The problem I think lies in the fact she married young, and never really saw herself or her husband objectively. That lack of clarity comes through and it's difficult to get a clear picture of who either of them really are. This means certain actions and behaviour seem to come out of the blue - when obviously no doubt in real life, there was plenty of lead up to them.

[Kelly · Rating 1 out of 5]

However many pages of self pitying tripe that didn't really illustrate the normal day to day life of living, working and bringing up a family on an Island. I wanted to read this book as I grew up on an Island as well as working and raising a family there and wanted to see what this authors take on it was. But I found her description of life on the mainland developing their farm far more interesting and should have stopped after those chapters. All she managed to do was show herself to be a weak willed woman who wouldn't stand up for herself or her child(ren)and her husband to be a boorish man who didn't take a blind bit of notice in her. Not pleasant reading at all.

[Frances · Rating 1 out of 5]

I really wanted to like this book, and was very interested in the subject matter.
I was hoping for a picture of island life and experiences, but the author rarely left her own head or house. How someone can fail to recognise their own unhappiness is beyond me - and although it sounds as if her children had largely a wonderful childhood, her story is more that of a 'surrendered wife' than the wild, feisty creature she tells us that she is.
A disappointing read.

[Martha · Rating 3 out of 5]

totally absorbing book of Judy's life , there were parts when I wondered how the hell she put up with a husband who frankly seems to be a selfish, self important, bully. I laughed, I cried (poor duchess) I envied her and I despaired at her. She comes across as humble and yet in places somehow smug, a genuine real life story, warts and all all to the backdrop of what sounds like a beautiful place.

[Beata · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5/5. Wise and honest observations and thoughts on the life of a contemporary woman in Scotland, but really anywhere. Most of us can probably relate deeply.

I like her writing style: clear, concise, lyrical. You get a great sense of place. Although it helps that I just happen to have taken a trip to the Isle of Mull last week :)

[Lynn · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not impressed. The author makes some really unnecessarily bitchy comments about people. Didn't finish it - off to the charity shop you go!

[Julie West · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this on a trip to the Outer Hebrides and thoroughly enjoyed it. It was funny, and witty. It vividly portrays coping with a big family whilst being involved with the family business. The writer fell into marriage at a young age and became fully absorbed, swept up, in running her home and family. This sounds extremely dull, but it isn’t, it is captivating, and fully describes how exhausting and demanding this was.
Judy’s life is unremittingly hard work, people depend on her and she does her best, and often finds humour in circumstances that would make others despair. She is unambitious for herself, and admirably loyal to her husband Alex.
I was surprised the couple could not make their business pay, despite their evident successes, especially with the whale watching business. It makes you wonder what they could have done differently - more training? More support?
I loved the historical sweep from the early days of motherhood to the non-stop chaotic later times with five children and a busy house, just getting on with things. Then later the feelings of loss, and of invisibility, of being left behind when the children leave, and having to find new interests.
I enjoyed the time of reflection, looking back, and with the benefit of hindsight towards the end of the book when the tone changed and became more philosophical. I was gladdened to learn how the fully matured adults Judy had nurtured took their places in the world. I found the poignancy of Judy being the one in the couple left alone at the end very moving, and although she finally enjoyed some recognition of her own, and financial security, I couldn’t help feeling that the best times were passed.

[Betty McIntyre · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book enormously. I liked the way it was written, the way it flowed. And it was satisfying to find at the end that the five children turned out so well and that Judy appeared to be happy with how things turned out in the end. I wonder if she has another book in her, somehow I feel this could be a one-off, which is a pity.

[Vivien · Rating 3 out of 5]

I listened to this audio book while sewing and was appalled at what an absolutely miserable existence this woman lived trying to run a hotel, holiday cottages and bring up five children with a husband who was busy (and absent) a lot of the time. At least she sorted things out in the end but what a tough time she had.

[Helen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very mixed feelings. If this had been fiction, I wouldn't have believed in the character! I'm glad I finished the book and it kept me thinking and discussing.

I suppose that other books with this sort of topic that I've read are much more told for laughs. This one shows more of the reality of this sort of life. (Not forgetting that there is humour within as well)

[Yvonne · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely adored this book and was sad that it came to an end. Judy Fairbairns is superwoman! I was still awake reading this until 2am most mornings. It's a fascinating insight into life on a Scottish island. I'd easily read this again, and I most probably will. A great book to just get lost in for a few hours each time. Wonderful.

[Elleigh · Rating 4 out of 5]

A tale of the hardships and pleasures of living on an Island off Scotland. Jenny and Alex move to a remote island trying to make a living running a farm and guest house. Jenny is pulled in different directions trying to bring up their children whilst making the business work, and the pressures take a toll on their relationship.
A beautiful and honest work that will resonate with many readers.

[Roberta Miceli · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow! A heartfelt journey of a woman who chooses to figure out how to run a summer inn in an old mansion on one of the remote Isles in Scotland. This is not your typical fix up a run down mansion. It's the journey of how to cope with living on a remote island with a husband who is a true pioneer, raising 5 children, and ultimately - reclaiming herself.

[Cathy Gale · Rating 5 out of 5]

I felt I really got to know Judy and her family through this extraordinary memoir. Such wit and excellent writing. I also liked the use of thematic chapters rather than a straight chronology. I don't normally read autobiography but this read like the best of fiction, with the added bonus that it was all true.

[Fiona Bromelow · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read quite a few autobiographies and biographies this year. Mostly they have been by politicians or celebreties or have chronicled hardship or unusual lives. This was one of the best written, but told of a less famous subject. A middle class English woman whose life takes her to the west coast of Scotland. As a read it was quite interesting but I was slighl disappointed that there was not more description of the landscape. I suppose she was so busy with her husband, their business and her children that she didn't get to see that much of it

[Michi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this book, could totally empathise with Judy in many parts, but felt that Alex was a bit selfish and overbearing. He did exactly as he wanted, but wouldn't allow her to do things she wanted, glad they managed to sort themselves out.

[Kathleen Fleming · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was enthralled by this book. Starting with the beginning of the author’s life as a wife on the edge of the world to her life on that same island with just her husband. She pulls no punches and gives us the ups and downs. I’m totally amazed by all she experiences. Excellent read!

[Sara Royall · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wanted to like this one more than I did... you just really want the author to stand up for herself, and it's hard to understand the appeal of her husband. The editing is also odd- the setting is very unclear in terms of location and time.

[Kelda · Rating 3 out of 5]

She annoyed me a little. Her story was intresting in parts.

[Susan Barraclough · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just finished reading this book. Totally loved it from the start. It transported me to a far away place each morning on my commute and for that alone I’m grateful.

[Louise · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful, emotional and true

Loved the bounce of this book and how well it was written. How raw and emotional it felt. Feel like I lived their lives.

[Mary · Rating 4 out of 5]

Eye opening for me. I waited much too long in my own life.

[Gordon · Rating 2 out of 5]

A friend gave me this book and I was looking forward to reading it. I felt it rambled on too much. However, Judy had to be admired for all her hard work.