In fremden Kleidern. Geschichte einer Jugend

by Paula Fox

Paula Fox hat uns im Laufe ihres Lebens bislang ein halbes Dutzend Romane geschenkt. Manche davon darf man wohl ohne Übertreibung "groß" nennen. Zuletzt hatten wir die Freude, mit Lauras Schweigen einen der besten ihrer Romane nach über zwanzig Jahren endlich auch auf Deutsch zu lesen. Und dies auch noch in einer vorzüglichen Übersetzung. Vielleicht hatten wir insgeheim ja noch gehofft, dass wir von dieser Sorte Bücher aus ihrer Feder noch das eine oder andere würden lesen dürfen. Dass uns die amerikanische Autorin aber noch einmal so richtig überraschen würde, damit freilich hatten wir nicht gerechnet. Etwas wirklich Neues jedenfalls hatten wir uns von Paula Fox nicht mehr erwartet. Mit In fremden Kleidern hat sie uns nun eines Besseren belehrt!

Fox erzählt uns von einer Kindheit und Jugend -- ihrer Jugend --, die mit einer Unsäglichkeit beginnt und danach noch zahlreiche Unsäglichkeiten bereithält. Nach der Geburt wird das kleine Mädchen von den Eltern erst einmal ins Waisenhaus gesteckt und später mal hier, mal dort abgestellt. Bei der Großmutter oder bei Verwandten, egal. Die Eltern -- die Mutter Schauspielerin, der Vater Drehbuchautor -- tauchen nur hin und wieder auf. Und dann zumeist, um das Kind wieder woandershin zu verfrachten. Nach Kuba, Florida oder Kalifornien, egal. Wie soll man da heimisch werden in seiner Haut? Oder wissen, wohin man gehört? Sicherlich nicht an die Seite dieses Matrosen, der doppelt so alt ist wie man selber, den man auch nicht sonderlich mag, den man aber heiratet, weil man sich "keine Alternative dazu vorstellen" kann. Auch an dieser Weggabelung steht das Mädchen, wie so oft, allein. Als sie von ihrem Vater, weil sie noch nicht volljährig ist, die schriftliche Einwilligung erbittet, kommentiert er das von ihm telegrafierte Einverständnis mit den Worten: "Wenn es das ist, was du willst".

Was soll man sagen? Man kann nur staunen, dass das Mädchen, das, so viel wollen wir verraten, auch aus dieser Ehe wieder herauskommt und am Ende nicht strandet. Im Pressetext des Verlages steht zu lesen, In fremden Kleidern sei "ein bewegendes und erschütterndes Werk". Das ist es sicherlich. Doch zugleich ist diese autobiografische Erzählung das bislang vielleicht sogar beste Buch von Paula Fox. Und hoffentlich nicht ihr letztes. Chapeau! --Hasso Greb

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Biography, Biography Memoir, American, Autobiography, Adoption

288 pages, Hardcover

First published September 5, 2000

About the author

Paula Fox was an American author of novels for adults and children and two memoirs. Her novel The Slave Dancer (1973) received the Newbery Medal in 1974; and in 1978, she was awarded the Hans Christian Andersen Medal. More recently, A Portrait of Ivan won the Deutscher Jugendliteraturpreis in 2008.

A teenage marriage produced a daughter, Linda, in 1944. Given the tumultuous relationship with her own biological parents, she gave the child up for adoption. Linda Carroll, the daughter Fox gave up for adoption, is the mother of musician Courtney Love.

Fox then attended Columbia University, married the literary critic and translator Martin Greenberg, raised two sons, taught, and began to write.

Reviews

[Peggy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Paula Fox won me over with her Newbery prize winning historical novel The Slave Dancer, a beautifully written young adult novel about the middle passage and a young boy’s compliance with the slave trade. So when I found her memoir Borrowed Finery in the stacks recently, I knew it was a must-read.

This is an unusual memoir, in that Paula Fox was an inconvenience to her parents, who dropped her off at the nearest orphanage shortly after she was born in 1923. Through a lucky set of coincidences, in her early years she had a stable, loving home with a Congregational Minister in the Hudson River valley, known to her as Uncle Elwood. Her life was peripatetic thereafter, occasionally visited by her father, then claimed by her grandmother, Paula was often left with her parents’ friends, and she lived in a variety of living situations with random groups of adults in Florida, Manhattan, Cuba, California, Montreal, and other places. She was neglected and ignored, but the adults she met did not abuse her—in fact, she met kindness from several of them. Others treated her more as a buddy than as a child (including her father, a drunk who tried to make it in Hollywood as a screenwriter). Her mother, from a Cuban family who lost their land in the Spanish-American war, harbored the most resentment against Paula and made little effort to care for her. The Borrowed Finery in the title refers to the hand me down clothing that Paula received, much of it ill-fitting and inappropriate for a child.

The memoir is written from a child’s point of view, a child who matures and becomes insightful, even a bit cynical, reflecting the sophisticated views of her parents. Fox sizes up characters in a pithy, compressed way. Her grandmother, for example, is elegantly described, “She paid no attention to the house or the woods or the river. Her landscape was interior, the countryside of her emotion.” How clearly childhood loneliness—and the disdain accompanying it—is conveyed.
Fox’s nightmarish childhood is always fascinating, as are the strange assortment of adults that she meets. It’s without sentiment or self-pity, making the episodes detailed even more stark and sad. Anyone who likes a good memoir will enjoy this one by a masterful writer. Paula Fox is worth discovering.

[Laurel · Rating 5 out of 5]

So basically I can't read 3 pages without remembering that Paula Fox will be Courtney Love's maternal grandmother. Paula Fox's mother Elsie, a screenwriter who had Paula when she was 19, will not really meet her Paula until she is 5 years old, because of Elsie's seeming & seething manic-depression and alcoholism. Elsie's mother Candelaria, who was married at 16, will have found and taken Paula from a foundling home at the age of 2 months, but will not keep her for long. Candelaria will try again and take back Paula when she is 7, and when Paula is 9 Candelaria will move them to a sugar plantation in Cuba for 1 year. Paula will eventually have a daughter named Linda, when Paula is 20, who will be given up for adoption. Paula will want her back after 10 days, but she will not succeed. Linda will become a distinguished family therapist sometime after she gives birth to a daughter, Courtney, when Linda is 20. Courtney will have become an emancipated minor at 16. Linda will not find out Paula is her mother until later, after. Linda will write Paula a letter. The 1st words will be "Go Slow." Someday, Courtney will have her own daughter, Frances Bean, when Courtney is 28. Frances Bean, in utero, 3 months a fetus, will be the impetus for Courtney to get off heroin.

Candelaria will spurn Elsie, who will reject Paula, who will give up Linda, who will lose Courtney, who will alienate Frances Bean.

And this will be the 20th century.

[LW · Rating 4 out of 5]

Un'infanzia nomade e vestiti sempre presi a prestito

Ha un modo particolare di raccontare la sua infanzia Paula Fox:
brevi flash , nitidi,con uno stile asciutto, chirurgico
e una narrazione spezzettata , rapida , quasi frenetica,
un po' come deve essere stata la sua vita, sin dai primi anni .
Si ha la sensazione di leggere un diario, e a volte sembra che siano state strappate alcune pagine...magari perché troppo dolorose da condividere .
Ci sono parole dure e parole taciute, di una bambina che si è sentita troppe volte rifiutata: abbandonata, appena nata,in un orfanotrofio e poi costretta a continui spostamenti, senza avere mai una vera casa e con vestiti sempre presi in prestito (borrowed finery,nel titolo originale)
I vestiti che mancano o sono inadatti per lei (come il tailleur di tweed azzurro di lana così spessa che poteva stare in piedi da solo!) tornano spesso nel racconto e diventano l'emblema della sua solitudine e della sua instabilità affettiva .
C'è un solo vestito nuovo,nei ricordi di Paula, legato all'unico momento felice della sua infanzia ,un regalo del reverendo,che lei affettuosamente chiamava zio Elwood :
un bel vestito a pois, tutto suo. (appunto il suo "vestito della festa")

Ah, un'ultima cosa, sul finale (no, tranquilli, non lo dirò!):
la scena delle due sedute vicine vicine sul marciapiede, a raccontarsi storie di vita punteggiandole di silenzi è quella che ti resta a fine lettura.
Semplicemente me-ra-vi-glio-sa!

(quattro stelline piene)

[Andrew]

The common narrative seems to be that the '60s kicked the door down, brought forth bohemian arrangements never before seen. To which, here is my counterexample. This shit is, as we said in high school, cray.

Paula Fox (who was Courtney Love's grandma, so looks like it runs in the family) was raised in as peripatetic fashion as one can imagine, taken from household to household, city to city, across three countries. Her voice is – as in her novel Desperate Characters – deliberately blasé, lacking in adornment. This is simply an old lady talking about her insane fucking childhood as straightforwardly as if she were talking about mortgages.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow! Borrowed Finery has accompanied me on my commute for the last several weeks.

In her brief spurts of memory, Paula Fox manages to describe a neglected childhood without self-pity and with dazzling imagery and observations that leave me breathless: "Standing there on winter afternoons, gripping an iron rail with a mittened hand, I watched the last violet light of the setting sun, the streetlights came on all at once like a word spoken in unison, and I felt touched by an ecstatic stillness." "I didn't know where Cuba was, but I found it in a school atlas, a green lizard lying athwart a blue sea."

I have only read one of her novels so far, but have two more on the shelf. I can't imagine being any more moved by them than I am by this memoir.

[Susan · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was recommended to me by a list of books that women should read. I really have no idea why, now that I've read it.
I researched the author and she is well regarded for her style and beautiful sentences. However I found this autobiography meandering, full of name-dropping, and strangely episodic.
It's not that it isn't interesting at times -she had a strange upbringing and it's amazing she turned out ok with the parents she had -but I can't recommend the book.

[Melissa Duclos · Rating 2 out of 5]

This memoir is comprised of anecdotes which, taken together, detail the childhood and young adulthood of Fox. While these stories create a richly developed character, they don't do much in the way of narrative. I found myself bored by the story, often confused about how much time had passed in the author's life. There's no real tension in the story, and so there's nothing pulling the reader through the memoir.

[Colleen O'Neill Conlan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read a collection of Fox's essays and stories a while back and wanted to read this memoir. Fox was almost literally the baby in a basket left on the steps of the orphanage by her freewheeling parents. In her case, her grandmother scooped her back up and brought her home. And so begins a life lived all over the world, with all kinds of caregivers.

The book is divided in chapters marking each of the places she briefly calls home, starting in upstate New York, with a bachelor minister and his elderly mother, her beloved "Uncle" Elwood. This seems to be the home that gave her the most stability and love. Her father flits in and out of her life, and she has a clear, if conflicted love, for him. He's a screenwriter and an alcoholic, and seems to be pulled between his wife and duty (and some real affection) toward his child. It's pretty clear that they can't all live together for any significant stretch of time, although they do for brief periods. Even how she talks about her parents is telling: her father is "Daddy" while her mother is "my mother," and eventually, "Elsie."

This book is a small study of dysfunction and abandonment. The final chapters talk about her giving birth and giving up her daughter for adoption. When she had misgivings and tried to get her back (much like her own grandmother retrieved her as a baby) she wasn't allowed to. They reunited many years later, and the memoir ends with their reconnection, so it's hard to know how their relationship is playing out. That daughter, Linda Carroll, is the mother of musician Courtney Love. Theirs has apparently been a contemptuous relationship. And it seems to continue with Courtney's daughter, Frances Bean Cobain, who is estranged from her mother. Candelaria, Elsie, Paula, Linda, Courtney, Frances Bean . . . a long line of bright, gifted, and perhaps unmothered women.

But that's just a sideline to this story. Fox doesn't tell her story like a survivor, but more like a participant/observer. And I'm not even sure "survivor" is the right word, as she certainly doesn't present herself as victimized. True, she may not have had a traditional childhood, but she did have these rich experiences that have made her the person, and the writer, that she is.

Next, on to some of her fiction.

[Kiran Kaur · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a very interesting memoir , although I found it to lack a little structure. The anecdotes throughout it are a mixture of entertaining, intriguing and very depressing, telling of a life lived with indifferent (and at times outright hostile) parents, who palm off the upbringing of their daughter onto their larger family.

The loving memories of the uncle who brought up Paula, Uncle Elwood, are wonderful, and add a happiness to this book. Unfortunately, Paula’s time being brought up by Uncle Elwood is far too short, and the rest of the book feels like it’s being lived on a razor’s edge, with the uncertainty and cruelty that Paula’s parents provide to her.

There is an interesting larger family circle to contend with, and certainly an intriguing history, and it is wonderful to read so many anecdotes of the various film stars that run throughout the book.

An enjoyable read, but also quite depressing in places.

[Jean · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is one of those smallish, episodic books that I end up reading cover to cover several times because it’s just so interesting and jig-saw puzzle-ish. Her very sharp and straightforward, but never dull, descriptions can be fitted together in many ways, and amplify/explain each other as they settle in your mind. The author has a highly unusual set of biographical facts re where she lived, who cared for her, and what she experienced. Her presentation is the opposite of seamless, but I found it very engaging and interesting.

[James T · Rating 4 out of 5]

In some ways this is not all that substantial a book, but it's wonderfully written. As with Ms. Fox's later work The Coldest Winter, Borrowed Finery recounts various episodes from Ms. Fox's life without pretending to be any sort of comprehensive biography.

Ms. Fox's many snippets of memory in this work add up to a fascinating and disturbing picture. Her parents were only sporadically involved in her life, with her father apparently unsure how to be a father, and her mother apparently resentful almost of her very existence. The young Paula ended up being shuffled from place to place and relative to relative, with only limited stretches of anything approaching stability.

As far as Ms. Fox's memories, they are vivid and crisply presented. In the hands of a lesser writer this sort of book well may not have worked. But it does work, both because of her formidable writing skills and because of her acute recollections of even small things from decades past. This is a relatively "easy" (if somewhat depressing) read, and one to which I likely will return.

[Beth · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've never read any fiction by Paula Fox, but I've always heard about this memoir. It's almost the literary equivalent of a David Lynch movie, set back in the early 20th century. Ordinary people, ordinary rooms...but very disturbing. The basic issue is her mother Elsie's total disinterest--actually, her intense dislike--of her own daughter. Her father tries, but he's no prize either. Lucky for Paula, they always found essentially decent people (Uncle Elwood being the kindest and most reliable) to take her off their hands. Fox's memory for detail and her ability to recapture a child's perspective are amazing. It's scene by scene through a nomadic, unpredictable life, an impressionistic narration of living unmoored. To her credit, Fox makes art of it.

[Ann M · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love the writing here, the sharp memories of the author's first 21 years -- then there is a jump to only two events in the rest of her life. One, when the daughter she gave up, unwillingly, for adoption finds her, and then when her very un-maternal mother dies, both when the author is in or near her seventies (I calculate). It's as if she's saying that her shunted to-and-fro childhood was all that mattered, and the telling of anecdotes is her way of getting a grip on it. (She does have a later memoir, tho.) Abandoned at birth, she was raised in NY's Hudson Valley by a loving minister until her Spanish grandmother claimed her and kept her in a tiny apartment in Queens until taking her to Cuba for a year until the revolution then back to NYC until her parents claimed her and deposited her -- alone with a housekeeper -- in Florida for a year... etc. It's a wonder she maintained any psychic wholeness. She recounts being the last girl at her boarding school in Montreal, because her father has invited her, late, for Christmas break. The headmistress takes her to a concert a few days before she herself is due to leave for France to visit relatives. It is 1942, and the concert is interrupted by the announcement that France has surrendered to Hitler. It's a patchy recollection of things and events and names are dropped without analysis but I really enjoyed this book.

[Paula · Rating 2 out of 5]

Very difficult to read such a grim memoir. Have started to put it down several times. Such a thrown-away child.

p17 "Time was long in those days, without measure. I marched through the mornings as if there were nothing behind me or in front of me, and all I carried, lightly, was the present, a moment without end."

p21 Looking at National Geographic magazines: "...I was startled each time by the singularity of everything that lived, whether in seashells, houses, nests, temples, logs, or forests, and in the multitude of ways creatures shelter and sustain themselves."

p30 Her devotion to Uncle Elwood who had taken her in: "...everything counted and...a word spoken as meant contained a mysterious energy that could awaken thought and feeling in both speaker and listener."

p57 telling her father she had returned to a camp where she had been left: " 'Ah well...people who've been parceled out and knocked around are always returning to the past, retracing their steps.' He spoke distantly, in a detached voice."

p75 "Time deceives memory."

[Catherine · Rating 2 out of 5]

She had a terrible childhood. We get flashes of feeling about it, but she recounts her life in such a detached way that there's no real incentive to get emotionally invested. I got through the first half of the book fine, but the end just started grating on me. Nothing tugging me along. Her mother seems like an interesting character (a terrible person, but an interesting character)—I just wish the author had speculated more on her mother and their relationship.

The memoir is a strung-up bunch of anecdotes, bouncing between stories ranging from "vaguely interesting" to "not at all interesting." I could've done without her innumerable name drops about celebrities she shared elevators with or saw in hallways. What did those stories add, except to say "Here's a famous person I encountered"? In my literary opinion it was pretty up its own butt.

[Brian · Rating 2 out of 5]

Jumped around too much. The character's life included moving around a lot, but it was told in a way that left little tying together all the various sub-stories at each place she lived. It made it hard to relate to her or cheer for her much. It barely mentioned anything risque and certainly pulled punches on almost anything sexual which could have brought a lot of reality into a memoir that includes coming of age from childhood all the way to adulthood. Too many characters with brief presences in the book made it hard to track who was who, how they were related to the author, etc. Very messy and unengaging. I considered not finishing it, but there was just enough good stuff to give it promise that it could get better or come together well, but it did neither.

[Paula · Rating 2 out of 5]

Paula Fox had a very sad and disjointed upbringing. After she was born, she was given to an orphanage. A Pastor takes her to raise but her father, Paul comes to visit her occasionally and sometimes takes her to where he and her mother live.

I really liked "Uncle Elwood", the pastor. He did his best to do right by Paula but once her father picked her up and she was tossed from one person to another, the storyline just fell apart for me. It is a sad and tragic book but there is not enough about anyone to get attached to, and some anonymous stories in her teens and adulthood that don't give you enough to know what really happened. It was just an ok read for me.

[Trisha · Rating 2 out of 5]

A tale of neglectful and mean-spirited parents, and the heartbreaking childhood they crafted for their daughter. What a gift it is to know the simple, normal joys of family life such as having parents who stay and keep their promises, being able to sleep in the same bed every night, enjoying dinner around the table, knowing love and hugs and affection, etc. This isn't a book I'll revisit or keep, but Fox offers some haunting reflections that move you to pause and consider how powerfully one generation shapes another and to give thanks for the glory of the routine and ordinary.

[Jameson Fink · Rating 5 out of 5]

Borrowed Finery contains possibly the best writing of any book I’ve ever read. I became emotionally invested in Paula Fox’s resonant memoir almost immediately. Every sentence is an evocative masterpiece, yet devoid of superfluous words. The ending is perfect. I can’t love this book more, a pinnacle of skill and storytelling.

[HansBlog · Rating 4 out of 5]

Deutschspr. Besprechung aus HansBlog.de:

In stimmungsvollen Vignetten erinnert sich die gefeierte Autorin Paula Fox (1923 – 2017) an ihre Kindheit in und um New York, Los Angeles, Kuba, Florida, Montreal, Pennsylvania, New New Hampshire. Weil ihre Eltern sie nicht um sich haben wollten, wurde sie immer wieder weitergereicht – an einen Kirchenmann, an Verwandte, quer durch Nordamerika. Oft wohnte sie ländlich.
Mit knappen, lakonischen Worten schafft Fox hochatmosphärische Szenen; eine betagte Erwachsene schreibt einfühlsam über sich selbst als staunendes kleines Mädchen, das immer neue Bezugspersonen und die Indifferenz der Eltern verarbeiten musste. Dass Paula Fox auch mit Jugendbüchern reüssierte, kann man sich danach gut vorstellen. Fox schreibt hier nüchtern, ohne Analysen, ohne Überleitungen; aber das Buch ist voller Untertöne und Querverbindungen.
Ihre Eltern, vor allem ihre kubanisch-spanische Mutter, behandeln die kleine Paula Fox betont lieblos. Manchmal klingt es, als wolle die Autorin ihre selbstsüchtige, Alkohol und Zigaretten verfallene Mutter in die Pfanne hauen. Paula Fox wirkt aber nie selbstgefällig, behält eine faszinierende Erzählstimme in stark wechselnden Umgebungen (ich kenne nur das engl. Original und kann die Eindeutschung nicht beurteilen).
Nur gute Erinnerungen hat Paula Fox an ihre Zeit mit dem alleinstehenden Kirchenmann und Autor "Onkel Elwood". Er lebt in einer Welt voller Bücher und historischer Bezüge und legt vielleicht frühe Grundlagen für Fox' literarische Karriere (auch wenn sie das so nicht sagt). Freilich war auch ihr Vater Paul Harvey Fox Drehbuch- und Romanautor mit 15 Einträgen bei IMDB; sie verdankt ihm aber scheinbar keine Inspiration, nur Gene.
Die Jugendmemoiren entstanden erst nach Fox' Romanerfolgen, und es gibt ein paar schmale Hinweise auf Inspirationen zu ihren Romanen:
- Einmal wird Paula Fox von einer Katze gebissen und behandelt die Wunde selbst – ein Anklang an ihren kurzen Erfolgsroman Was am Ende bleibt/Desparate Characters.
- Ihr Vater erzählt von seiner Schreibarbeit in Hollywood und dass er dort F. Scott Fitzgerald traf, "a minor poet" in seinen Worten (der über Hollywood die schönen Pat Hobby-Geschichten schrieb); Paula Fox selbst lebt in diesem Buch mehrfach in Hollywood, sieht sekundenweise auch John Wayne, Harpo Marx und Orson Welles; das lässt an Paula Fox' Roman über das 1940er-Hollywood denken, Kalifornische Jahre/Western Coast (1972).
- Fox spricht perfekt Spanisch mit karibischem Akzent und sagt, dass sie deshalb mit Latinos und Latino-Angestellten immer gut zurechtkam; in Luisa/A Servant's Tale (1984) schreibt sie über eine hispanische Arbeiterin in den USA. Luisas kubanische Erlebnisse erinnern natürlich an Paula Fox' Kuba-Eindrücke.
- Die gesamte Foxsche Familienaufstellung samt vielen Einzelerlebnissen kehrt wieder im beißenden Fox-Roman Lauras Schweigen/The Widow's Children (1976)
Dieses spartanisch schöne, schlanke Buch hat nur wenig Misstöne: Zum einen stört das Schauspieler-Namedropping; und die immer wieder schockierend egoistischen Sprüche der eiskalten Mutter wirken wie ein bitterer running gag, wie eine späte Rache der nun endlich selbstbewussten Tochter an der egozentrischen, abwesenden und abweisenden Mutter. (Wegen der immer wieder unliebenswürdigen Mutter klingen Fox' Memoiren auch nicht selbstmitleidlos, im Gegensatz zur einhelligen Kritikermeinung.)
Fox schrieb In fremden Kleidern als Übung nach Kopfverletzungen in Folge eines Überfalls in Jerusalem. Sie schrieb später noch ein Buch über etwa ein Jahr als Jungjournalistin vor allem im kriegszerstörten Europa (Der kälteste Winter/The coldest Winter), das stilistisch deutlich an die Fremden Kleider erinnert; weitere Memoiren gibt es nicht von Fox. Es gibt mindestens eine Biografie zu Paula Fox, auf Deutsch geschrieben von Bernadette Conrad, mit vielen persönlichen Erlebnissen der Biografin auf Recherche; anders als das Fox-Buch zeigt Conrad auch Bilder von Fox' Familie und Pflegevater.

[Eva Holzmair · Rating 3 out of 5]

„In fremden Kleidern“ ist ein Erinnerungsbuch der US-amerikanischen Autorin Paula Fox, das 1999 im englischen Original und 2003 in der deutschen Übersetzung von Susanne Röckel erschien.

Diese „Geschichte einer Jugend“, wie es um Untertitel heißt, zu rezensieren, fällt schwer. Das liegt an der Erzählweise, in der aneinandergereihte Erlebnisse den rissigen roten Faden bilden. Die Szenen wechseln oft abrupt, als ob es die Autorin nicht interessieren würde, den Faden weiterzuspinnen.

Wer wenige Tage nach der Geburt von den Eltern im Waisenhaus abgegeben, danach von der aus Kuba angereisten Großmutter herausgeholt und Bekannten überantwortet wird, kann vielleicht auch in den Erinnerungen keine Wurzeln schlagen, muss von einer Station zur nächsten hasten, da noch etwas einflechten, dort einen Namen fallenlassen und ständig mit neuen Wendungen überraschen.

Anfangs ist die kleine Paula noch liebevoll aufgehoben bei Reverend „Onkel“ Elwood, später wird sie quer durch Nordamerika mit einem mehrmonatigen Abstecher nach Kuba von Betreuerin zu Betreuer weitergereicht, je nachdem, wer sich gerade für Paula zuständig fühlt, was zuweilen sogar der charmante, doch leider alkoholabhängige Vater sein kann.

Der lakonische Tonfall des Buchs verbittet sich jedes Mitgefühl, aber letztlich auch jedes Eingehen auf die übergangslos aufgefädelten Ereignisse. Ob es sich um den seltenen Kleiderkauf mit Onkel Elwood, den gerade mal wieder zugewandten charmanten Vater, den Besuch einer Schule in Montreal, der Juilliard School in New York, die fünfte, sechste, siebente Übersiedlung handelt, die Leserin nimmt es unbeteiligt zur Kenntnis.

Paula heiratet jung in Kalifornien. Das erfahren wir unvermittelt nach einem Absatz über Jobsuche: „Ich ging eine kurze katastrophale Ehe mit einem Schauspieler ein, den ich im International House kennengelernt hatte.“ Wenig später besteigt der gute Mann „einen Bus nach New York“, beendet seinen Kurzauftritt und damit Paulas autobiografisches Interesse an ihm.

Dass nach dieser Kindheit und Jugend Paula Fox ihre neugeborene Tochter zur Adoption freigibt, überrascht nicht. Dass sie laut Bio erfolgreich Kinderbücher schreibt, schon eher. Berührt wird die Leserin von keiner dieser Informationen.

Das Buch endet mit Paulas Wiederbegegnung mit ihrer nun längst erwachsenen Tochter, die ihre Mutter ausfindig gemacht hat. Ob Paulas Vater, ein nicht sehr erfolgreicher Drehbuchautor, dieses Ende gutgeheißen hätte? Mit entsprechender Filmmusik und Großaufnahmen der beiden Frauen vielleicht.

[Virginia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This certainly started off "grim," to use another reviewer's word - dismissive refrigerator mother, spineless, sarcastic drunk father, and a parade of pleasant but temporary, well, place-givers rather than caregivers. The warmest, most nurturing caregiver, a young minister who lived with his chronically ill mother, vanishes from Paula's life when she is 6. People appear and disappear, create fleeting impressions, make way for other people. I loved the constant time changes - isn't that how we view our pasts anyway? - and they do follow a certain memory logic.
I hadn't known anything about Paula Fox, apart from a few of her children's books I'd read in college so was quite surprised by the information she springs on the reader in the final pages of this memoir. (A quick glance at her wiki page supplies the name of her possible youthful fling - um, wow - and a further look at her daughter's memoirs takes the story in a whole other direction.)
Now that I have this insight into Fox's early life, I'm inclined to look up her books again and reread those I found engaging all those years ago. This is from her NYT obituary:

“Children know about pain and fear and unhappiness and betrayal,” she said in an interview quoted in the reference work Contemporary Authors. “And we do them a disservice by trying to sugarcoat dark truths. There is an odd kind of debauchery I’ve noticed, particularly in societies that consider themselves ‘democratic’ or ‘liberal’: They display the gory details but hide meaning, especially if it is ambiguous or disturbing.”

[Jaden]

Biography

Borrowed Finery is a memoir of Paula Fox’s life. Her story takes place in Manhattan where she is born. Her father, Paul, is a drunken screenwriter and her mother, Elsie, who is very cold hearted, place her in an orphanage. Her grandmother rescued her and takes her to Cuba. From there she bounces back and forth from Cuba and the states. At the age of five she is taken in by a Congregational minister, Uncle Elwood. A few years later her parents come back into her life until her mother makes her father decide between her or Paula. She is then sent to live with another stranger. She lives in Queens, Cuba, Jacksonville, Florida, and Montreal. In between these moves there are painful shards of time she spends with her terrible parents. At the age of 18 she is sent to Hollywood in the care of an alcoholic family friend. In the last chapter, Paula Fox describes visiting her Mother, Elsie, who she hadn’t seen for many years. They shake hands but Paula hates her so much she can’t even use the same bathroom as her. Two weeks before she turned 21, she gave birth to her daughter who she gave up for adoption. Her daughter found her years later and they wrote back and forth to each other.

[Luna Tønnessen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lånt stas er et portrett av den verdenskjente amerikanske forfatteren Paula Fox. Hun hadde sin storhetstid på 70- og 80 tallet og står bak titler som Revolutionary Road, Desperate Characters og The Slave Dancer. I memoaren får vi innblikk i hvordan hun som barn har måtte leve med omsorgsvik. Hun reflekterer og mimrer over egen oppvekst og barndom, og skildrer et mildt sagt innholdsrikt liv!

Fox blir bortadopert til et barnehjem i Manhatten, mens foreldrene reiser til Hollywood for å satse på karriere. Der blir hun plukket opp av bestemoren som tar vare på henne mens den unge 19 år gamle moren Elsie er fraværende og den smålig alkoholiserte faren Paul Hervey vil "låne" henne når det passer han. Barndommen hennes preges av at hun blir fraktet rundt som en pakke. Sendt til kostskole, overlatt helt alene eller plassert hos nokså tilfeldige voksne bekjente av familien. Bosituasjonen er med andre ord ustabil, og hun forteller om korte og lengre opphold i bla. New York, Florida, Cuba, California, Montreal.

En facinerende oppvekstroman! Også med tanke på at hun selv valgt adoptere bort barnet sitt i senere tid.. Boka er oversatt til nynorsk, lettlest, humoristisk og sårbar på samme tid :-)

[Lucia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dopo aver letto due romanzi di Paula Fox, Il silenzio di Laura e Quello che rimane, che mi erano piaciuti ma non mi avevano del tutto convinta, ho saputo dell’esistenza di questa autobiografia pubblicata da Fazi e sono riuscita a trovarne una copia. Sono immensamente felice di averla letta, e la consiglio assolutamente. La storia è focalizzata soprattutto sui primi anni di vita, infanzia ed adolescenza, della scrittrice, con un rapido finale che “chiude” in modo sorprendente e inaspettato il cerchio. Una infanzia incredibile, caratterizzata da vicende a volte tristi a volte quasi spassose, ma narrata con una voce limpida e cristallina. Sembra quasi di vedere il mondo attraverso lo sguardo innocente e trasparente di una bambina, che resiste alle intemperanze ed agli egoismi degli adulti grazie a pochi, fondamentali, punti di riferimento (uno su tutti, zio Elwood) e che ci incanta descrivendo il profumo di una piantagione di canna da zucchero o una casetta in affitto a Nantucket. Un libro bellissimo.

[Tony Fellino · Rating 4 out of 5]

The non linear style of narration may jar some readers not used to memories being presented as short, sometimes unrelated segments this way. For someone with a short attention span I found her short blocks of memory being offered up like tiny little poems or snapshots in a photo album really appealing. I found some of those short paragraphs had a much more deeply poignant and profound impact than they would have if she had elaborated on them with with more pathos and self pitying detail. The short, blunt, terse way she describes terribly sad situations and ends her description very bluntly like a door suddenly closing on you leaves the last sentence reverberating in your mind really effectively. I love her style of writing even if others may find it alienating. Its elegant and dignified but never cold. There is warmth and compassion but its not vain and self conscious kindness. Its the kindness of an individual who has suffered enough to know to spend that kindness wisely and cautiously. I found this a haunting and darkly enchanting book.
A lot like Elsie herself.

[Lalo Carvajal · Rating 2 out of 5]

“De vez en cuando alguien pasa a nuestro lado, pero no nos hace menor caso mientras nos contamos cosas de nuestras vidas respectivas , guardando silencio de vez en cuando “

Esta frase simplemente describe (y porque no , resume ) el libro . Una lenta pero audaz autobiografía de alguien que pregona haber sufrido “mucho” (y quien soy yo para juzgar el sufrimiento de otros), pero simplemente no capte el sufrimiento. Una historia que pudo haber pasado por “realismo mágico” pero pecó de detalles circunstanciales innecesarios (para mi gusto ), no es un libro que recomiende si uno está acostumbrado a pasos acelerados y quizás por eso no la disfrute, y aunque si deja ciertas reflexiones del rol que juegan ciertas figuras en nuestra vida , jamás deja nada claro (quizás su objetivo, quizás la vida es así).

Calif: 6 de 10 , un libro , que aunque pertenece a una hermosa editorial (Turner) , me dejó mucho que desear en su narrativa .

[Robert McDonald · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading this after her whole adult fiction catalogue feels like a best hits album. Or worst hits, depending how you look at it.

Reading this woman's life at once made me feel morose, grateful, marvelled, and pitiful. Fragments of history and glamour twinkle past her narrative like the glimmers of hope she's promised but never arrives.

Throughout all my reading I knew Fox had an estranged daughter, so I was anticipating that first meeting like a firecracker akin to The Widows Children. But I was surprised. Gladdened. I felt like there was hope, on that curb, where Fox and Laura sit perpetually beyond.

Our own lives can often feel deflated. Fox instils life in the areas one never considers.

[Darla Ebert · Rating 4 out of 5]

Memoirs can be startling not only in the complexities of the memories for the author but by the sheer mass of those memories. And when the remembered incidences are connected with serial abandonment, the reader can be, well, almost scarred by what is being read, traumatized just by identification with the one about whom one is reading. Especially and most particularly when that author's memories are of early childhood. This story is of the kind I have just detailed and so though the telling is interesting and well-versed, it is likewise disturbing to the senses. Ms. Fox is or was a courageous woman, and she was an unusually brave child.

[Bonnie · Rating 4 out of 5]

From my sheltered midwest upbringing, stable home, two loving parents and all that implies, I can't imagine emerging whole from the childhood Paula Fox describes. Passed along among relatives and family friends, hauled from one home to another across countries, how do you find any place to ground yourself? This story is continually compelling, with Dad Paul popping in and out, mercurial and yet, it seems, loving, And then there is Elsie, who discards her daughter at birth and remains a cold ghost. The story at the end of the book, when Paula visits her dying mother, sets a seal on the entire relationship.