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A Private Life: Fragments, Memories, Friends
A collection of reminiscences that reveal the private Michael Kirby. Speaking in his own voice, he opens up as never before in a beautifully written, reflective and generous memoir - one that Michael Kirby's many admirers have been waiting for. Michael Kirby is one of Australia's most admired public figures. In times of spin and obfuscation, he speaks out passionately and straightforwardly on the issues that are important to him. Even those who disagree with him have been moved by the courage required of him to come out as a high-profile gay man, which at times has caused him to be subjected to outrageous assaults on his character. This is a collection of reminiscences in which we discover the private Michael Kirby speaking in his own voice. He opens up as never before about his early life, about being gay, about his forty-two year relationship with Johan van Vloten, about his religious beliefs and even about his youthful infatuation with James Dean, which sent him on a sentimental journey to Dean's home town in the year 2000, an adventure he here wryly recalls. Beautifully written, reflective and generous, in that warm and gently self-deprecating voice that is so characteristic of him, this is a memoir that Michael Kirby's many admirers have been waiting for.
216 pages, Paperback
First published September 28, 2011
15 people are currently reading
214 people want to read
About the author
Michael Kirby
122 books7 followersLibrarian Note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads' database with this name. See this thread for more information.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 50 reviews
October 27, 2017
This book demonstrates emphatically the irrelevance of sexual orientation in the wider community. Who we love is not for others to decide. Here is a man who has achieved great things, despite the opposition and narrow mindedness that would have surrounded him during his early career. He has been a brave educator who deserves every accolade that has come his way. It has certainly been a life well lived. There are many people who would benefit greatly from reading this book.
September 20, 2022
A must read for any Kirby fan and a perfect exemplar of his quietly emphatic, unwavering commitment to social Justice.
April 30, 2012
At the end of the day all our judges, even our High Court judges are people, brilliant people at that, but still human like the rest of us. It is easy to forget that life as well as law can shape their decisions. This book was an honest insight into the life of someone I have come to admire. It is people like Michael Kirby that remind me that the pursuit of a legal profession can be a nobel one.
June 19, 2012
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book, wanted it to keep going. A very intelligent, interesting, compassionate and brave man. I now want to read his other books.
April 26, 2013
Such a class act and such a deftly written memoir - admire him even more now ! Must read !
August 17, 2015
Initially I found this book to be an easy read and appreciated how it was written so effortlessly, making you feel like Kirby was an older relative recalling interesting tales of his past.
As it progressed however there were parts that really moved me.
I was actually shocked to find how recently it was that homosexual relationships were fraught with legal restrictions. I know we still have a long way to go in terms of equal rights, discrimination and acceptance but boy, have we come along way from the 1950's!
Kirby's strength and honesty were refreshing. If there was one thing I admired most about Kirby, it was the reflections on his relationship with Johan. Their mutual respect, support and love was heart-warming. I know few heterosexual relationships that benefit from these qualities so absolutely. Perhaps there is something for heterosexuals to reflect on here, in terms of creating equal relationships with mutual admiration between the sexes - on this front I think perhaps there are lessons heterosexuals can take from same sex couples.
As it progressed however there were parts that really moved me.
I was actually shocked to find how recently it was that homosexual relationships were fraught with legal restrictions. I know we still have a long way to go in terms of equal rights, discrimination and acceptance but boy, have we come along way from the 1950's!
Kirby's strength and honesty were refreshing. If there was one thing I admired most about Kirby, it was the reflections on his relationship with Johan. Their mutual respect, support and love was heart-warming. I know few heterosexual relationships that benefit from these qualities so absolutely. Perhaps there is something for heterosexuals to reflect on here, in terms of creating equal relationships with mutual admiration between the sexes - on this front I think perhaps there are lessons heterosexuals can take from same sex couples.
February 8, 2015
The latest "in" thing at the Factory is a "get to know" one of the indentured labourers via a series of questions. Reading Michael Kirby's memories and essays delivered me a more than definitive answer to "who would you most like to have dinner with". Australia is so fortunate to have a judge of his quality. Michael Kirby - who can articulate a cogent argument (in a manner in which one who is not a member of the judiciary can readily understand) and do so with grace and humour. This is definitely a book to be read again.... and again. On the off chance The Honourable Justice Kirby reads this review sir it would be an honour and a privilege to even balance a dinner tray on my knee just next to you. Thank you for writing such a beautiful book.
May 17, 2019
Reading through his jurisprudence used to be a favourite knock-around of mine when I first moved to Sydney in my early 20’s. Happy I was able to finally read the memoir! Accessing court briefs and rulings was then open to all through the law school; great 'prose' which was an easy option to say shelling out at a large book store. But I remember eventually losing interest in his activist approach mixed with strong Anglican leanings with my attention drifting elsewhere; perhaps finding his unexpressive and uneconomical analysis some what taxing. Don't quite remember.
January 4, 2016
Very belated and short review. While my general memory of the book is faded, I distinctly remember being incredibly emotionally affected by the very powerful chapter on James Dean - so much so I had to flee to the toilet on the flight I was on so that I didn't very publicly break down!
April 7, 2012
Such intimacy, honesty, gentle insight and dignity. I have so much respect for this man, and this book has reinforced that respect. A truly great human being, and a thoroughly engaging memoir.
September 1, 2016
A very disappointing read, especially as the book as so many flowery reviews. I found it disjointed, not overly well written, and without substance. Sorry, but this book is a big miss for me.
May 2, 2019
As a Law student, there is a running joke that Kirby dissents in every case that comes before him. When he does not, it is almost a momentous occasion. Subsequently, Kirby is a legal icon amongst my peers and I. Though I do not agree with every judgment he has made, I admire his intellectual vigour and knowledge of just about everything that is happening in the world.
Subsequently, this means that this is not my first introduction to Kirby. I have read countless of his judgments, speeches, and theses. I however, found it enjoyable and moving.
In short: Justice Kirby is also a gay icon, a human rights icon, just ICONIC in every facet possible. He is undeniable brilliant, and a source of inspiration for many others including myself.
Kirby's career accentuates that one's sexuality is entirely irrelevant to how successful one can be. His accomplishments are already public knowledge, yet, it was wonderful to read a more personal account of his life. He is an incredibly interesting man, so it was a delight to be able to gain an insight into his childhood and into his experiences.
He writes candidly and honestly about his reflections as an openly gay man that is also a public servant. Evidently, being in the public eye - this would come with many ramifications, attacks, and abuses. I can only admire his strength, and the strength of every LGBT individual that has faced rejection and discrimination.
Yet Kirby is not bitter by those experiences. He is humble, kind, and open-minded. Kirby is an inspiration to many communities, and is arguably one of the most bravest people in Australian judicial history.
The memoir itself is very easy to read, and paints a very vivid picture. I loved reading it, and I only wish that it was longer.
Subsequently, this means that this is not my first introduction to Kirby. I have read countless of his judgments, speeches, and theses. I however, found it enjoyable and moving.
In short: Justice Kirby is also a gay icon, a human rights icon, just ICONIC in every facet possible. He is undeniable brilliant, and a source of inspiration for many others including myself.
Kirby's career accentuates that one's sexuality is entirely irrelevant to how successful one can be. His accomplishments are already public knowledge, yet, it was wonderful to read a more personal account of his life. He is an incredibly interesting man, so it was a delight to be able to gain an insight into his childhood and into his experiences.
He writes candidly and honestly about his reflections as an openly gay man that is also a public servant. Evidently, being in the public eye - this would come with many ramifications, attacks, and abuses. I can only admire his strength, and the strength of every LGBT individual that has faced rejection and discrimination.
Yet Kirby is not bitter by those experiences. He is humble, kind, and open-minded. Kirby is an inspiration to many communities, and is arguably one of the most bravest people in Australian judicial history.
The memoir itself is very easy to read, and paints a very vivid picture. I loved reading it, and I only wish that it was longer.
February 10, 2018
I’ve had a mild obsession with Michael Kirby for coming up on 8 years now, but somehow not read this memoir until now. Even then ngl it’s mostly because I’m seeing him irl in a few weeks (I’m so keen I may cry) but damn I’m glad I finally did. I love legal studies but I’m so bad at it I was worried that I’d struggle through this but it is a surprisingly easy read, even when it gets into stuff about the UN. It’s more based in personal anecdotes than case law. One of the reasons Kirby is such an important legal figure and amazing human is that love is at the core of everything he believes, and it’s so obvious to see. The world needs more like him.
December 27, 2020
Memoirs are a bit hit and miss for me, and this one was far more miss than hit, because I found Kirby at times remote and at others unlikeable. I can’t even point at why, because I did find aspects of the essays really interesting. In the essay on meeting his life partner, Kirby comes across as not really liking his younger self, which made me quite uncomfortable. On the other hand, the essay on talking to members of the legal profession in Africa (I forget which country, and I don’t have the book to hand) gave a really good perspective on the AIDS crisis I hadn’t previously been even remotely aware of.
July 18, 2021
'A private' life is a memorising book that gives deep insight and a generous look into the life of the former high court Judge. The book doesn't impose any self-beliefs but rather offers simply the facts of his life and the relevant tools to make your own decisions and view on homosexuality and the greater LGBT community. He is simply a man with the utmost respect for the rule of law and the profound sense of justice for which all humans are entitled.
January 7, 2024
Thoughtful and thought-provoking reflections abound in this memoir. Kirby covers many personal and intimate subjects with candour, humility and humour. Topics span from his early years of schooling to his romantic partnerships and human rights advocacy. This memoir provides a wonderful insight into Kirby's upbringing and values, and provides inspiration for readers to stand up for what they believe in and work to make the world a better place.
May 2, 2020
I remember Michael Kirby once saying "is there no subject that I won't speak about?". This book is a reflection of that sentiment. Short chapters reflecting different events in his long and distinguished life. Not a great book but easily read to fill some locked down hours. (Borrowed from the reception area book shelf in an apartment building in London, UK.)
February 10, 2023
This is a wonderful memoir - I thoroughly enjoyed it. Michael Kirby is an amazing human and I liked his honest insights growing up gay in Sydney in the 1950s and 1960s. I enjoyed the stories of his travels, his sense of social justice, the love and admiration he has for his long term partner Johan and the energy he has put into roles since retiring from the High Court of Australia.
December 28, 2021
An admirable, erudite, fair, clear-thinking chap. An easy and enjoyable read. I thought it might’ve been a little more interesting but enjoyable nonetheless. The world is a better place thanks to Michael Kirby.
February 15, 2024
I am a big fan of Michael Kirby but I was disappointed that this book focused mainly on his sexuality.
There is certainly a place for a chapter on this in his book but to run it as the common theme for the whole book is unnecessary and I didn’t bother finishing the book.
There is certainly a place for a chapter on this in his book but to run it as the common theme for the whole book is unnecessary and I didn’t bother finishing the book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 19, 2018
Marvellous read, highly recommend
December 31, 2022
A fascinating insight into the personality, life and work of this man!
October 18, 2012
Kirby's book is only fragments and reflections of his life, but they still give a remarkable insight into this interesting and inspiring man.
It is hard to separate myself entirely from the subject, as I write from a far more privileged existence than Kirby had in regards to coming out and living as a gay man. Sure, there are still many problems now with the fight for equality--and, simple respect--but Kirby grew up in a time where it was still illegal for us to merely exist.
Yet, strangely enough, it was his chapter on his love for James Dean that I could relate to the most. Like Kirby, I had a consuming passion for the actor in my teens, and at first I wasn't sure entirely what it was. I just knew that there was something in the reserved and melancholic eyes of Dean I knew was part of myself - I think that was why Dean was the ultimate Hollywood teenager, as anybody could write their own identity--whatever it was--onto him. He was the embodiment of angst, of secrets, of feeling that you couldn't live up to the potential expected of you, and that deep down there was nobody else like you and nobody else understood how you felt. It was even more apparent in East of Eden than Rebel Without A Cause, where Cal's longing for approval was naked upon his face in every scene.
This is turning more into a review of James Dean than Michael Kirby, but I do find it interesting that even with the decades between them, the spirit of Dean still reaches queer youth and speaks to them - in spite of, or because of, his own search for identity.
It is hard to separate myself entirely from the subject, as I write from a far more privileged existence than Kirby had in regards to coming out and living as a gay man. Sure, there are still many problems now with the fight for equality--and, simple respect--but Kirby grew up in a time where it was still illegal for us to merely exist.
Yet, strangely enough, it was his chapter on his love for James Dean that I could relate to the most. Like Kirby, I had a consuming passion for the actor in my teens, and at first I wasn't sure entirely what it was. I just knew that there was something in the reserved and melancholic eyes of Dean I knew was part of myself - I think that was why Dean was the ultimate Hollywood teenager, as anybody could write their own identity--whatever it was--onto him. He was the embodiment of angst, of secrets, of feeling that you couldn't live up to the potential expected of you, and that deep down there was nobody else like you and nobody else understood how you felt. It was even more apparent in East of Eden than Rebel Without A Cause, where Cal's longing for approval was naked upon his face in every scene.
This is turning more into a review of James Dean than Michael Kirby, but I do find it interesting that even with the decades between them, the spirit of Dean still reaches queer youth and speaks to them - in spite of, or because of, his own search for identity.
March 10, 2012
When I first studied law I knew only a little of Michael Kirby's reputation as a jurist. What I knew more of was his stature as a high-profile public figure and open gay man. Coming as it does after the publication of AJ Brown's biography, these personal notes on his private life is an easy read. He recounts the most seminal moments of his life, from a brief discussion of his childhood and schooling, to the pivotal moments of his upbringing such as his obsession with James Dean. The night he met his partner Johan is also recounted.
Michael Kirby is someone I have long admired and I am glad he has published this work for those of us who admire not only his judicial approach but also his thoroughly humanitarian and human undertakings. The book itself is quite short, but long enough that you feel you have a more real insight into this remarkable Australian.
Michael Kirby is someone I have long admired and I am glad he has published this work for those of us who admire not only his judicial approach but also his thoroughly humanitarian and human undertakings. The book itself is quite short, but long enough that you feel you have a more real insight into this remarkable Australian.
December 11, 2011
I'm only 30% in so far but this man can write. He's articulate, logical and amusing. The reader is told at the beginning what to expect from this book and he delivers exactly that. He doesn't hide anything (not obviously anyway) but he is circumspect: must be his legal background.
At 60% I have to remind myself I only have time for one chapter each night. Kirby's spare writing draws images that remind me of partially completed paintings. It makes me think and makes me wonder. It makes me angry at the narrow-mindedness still prevalent in some sections of society. And he accomplishes all this without preaching or graphic delving into his own privacy or others'.
*Sigh* This one I'll read again. What a fascinating man and what difficult decision he made in order to live the life he wanted.
At 60% I have to remind myself I only have time for one chapter each night. Kirby's spare writing draws images that remind me of partially completed paintings. It makes me think and makes me wonder. It makes me angry at the narrow-mindedness still prevalent in some sections of society. And he accomplishes all this without preaching or graphic delving into his own privacy or others'.
*Sigh* This one I'll read again. What a fascinating man and what difficult decision he made in order to live the life he wanted.
March 28, 2015
I'd heard of Justice Kirby but I didn't know about the man. I never knew he lived or was born at Concord and I loved reading everything he had to say about his youth as I lived there as well so could relate to everything he said. That also applied to when he went to live at Kirribilli so I felt I had something in common with him about his life.
On finishing the book I have to say that I really respect and admire the way he has talked about his personal life. I think he has done a great good for the homosexual community.
On finishing the book I have to say that I really respect and admire the way he has talked about his personal life. I think he has done a great good for the homosexual community.
March 1, 2015
One of my favourite paintings in the National Portrait Gallery is a picture of Michael Kirby in his judicial robes. It's a beautiful portrait which captures a sense of strength, wisdom and compassion. It's appropriate that this portrait is also used in this book which also highlights these characteristics while providing the reader some understanding of the difficulties he and other gay people face.
March 22, 2024
Had a copy of the book signed after his speech at the 'Festival of dangerous ideas'.
Quiet, gentle persuasion in the face of deeply personal injustice. This was an interesting reflection on advocacy and personal progress. Kudos on the book, look forward to hearing another talk / reading another one of your books.
Quiet, gentle persuasion in the face of deeply personal injustice. This was an interesting reflection on advocacy and personal progress. Kudos on the book, look forward to hearing another talk / reading another one of your books.
August 14, 2013
As a long-time admirer -and acquaintance - of Mr Kirby, I'm somewhat ashamed that it took me so long to read this remarkable book. As one who as had the privilege of hearing him speak on many occasions, I found that I could "hear" his phrasing and intonation as I read. As always, he is inspiring, compelling and compassionate.
March 10, 2012
An intimate book. I admit my bias to Michael Kirby as one of the great Australians of my generation.
Still, this is, as the title says, A private Life and we are allowed to enter Michael's world. I describe this as a gentle book. Well worth the read.
Still, this is, as the title says, A private Life and we are allowed to enter Michael's world. I describe this as a gentle book. Well worth the read.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 50 reviews