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The Cat Manual
Humorous advice for cats, by cats.
The author "discovered" the feline world's best-kept secret in a file hidden on his mother's computer by her cat, Cleo, and now shares it with humanity for the first time. Topics covered range from avoiding visits to the vet, to the artful display of captured prey, to getting in the way of a human trying to read anything, including this paragraph. Upon publication, Cleo denied authorship and hired a team of lawyers with their claws out, but despite her best efforts, word is spreading with over 75,000 Kindle
The Cat Manual is hilarious for cat-lovers of all ages.
From the author of Cave Passages and Dark Life.
The author "discovered" the feline world's best-kept secret in a file hidden on his mother's computer by her cat, Cleo, and now shares it with humanity for the first time. Topics covered range from avoiding visits to the vet, to the artful display of captured prey, to getting in the way of a human trying to read anything, including this paragraph. Upon publication, Cleo denied authorship and hired a team of lawyers with their claws out, but despite her best efforts, word is spreading with over 75,000 Kindle
The Cat Manual is hilarious for cat-lovers of all ages.
From the author of Cave Passages and Dark Life.
51 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 17, 2012
178 people are currently reading
705 people want to read
About the author
Michael Ray Taylor
9 books15 followersMichael Ray Taylor is the author of Cave Passages, Dark Life, and Caves, and has written for Sports Illustrated, Audubon, Outside, Reader's Digest, National Geographic Traveler, The Houston Chronicle, and the website of The Discovery Channel. He has consulted on feature films and has worked on documentaries for National Geographic, PBS and The Discovery Channel. He is a professor of communication at Henderson State University and lives in Arkadelphia, Arkansas, with his wife, three sons, his father-in-law, two cats, and a rat terrier. His hobbies include caving, cooking, and playing bass in Blind Opie, a rock band.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 194 reviews
April 5, 2016
The fabulous felines Penny & Chloe are back with their three choice rules of catitude, which when questioned they firmly deny came from The Cat Manual. They will not admit such a thing exists, or that they are secretly thrilled that their human has read it, as this can only mean more treats.
The intelligent adult feline can tolerate only so much snuggy-wuggums.
Penny: Ugh. Human snuggles. There's nothing worse.
Chloe: I think human snuggles are kind of nice. I think you're nice!
Penny: Shut up.
Nothing the human can read is more interesting than you. Therefore, when the human picks up a book, magazine, or newspaper, you may best assist him or her by interposing your magnificent Self between the page and humanity.
Penny: Why does she do that? She lays around for hours at a time and stares at nothing and giggles or cries at it like a moron. Although, the shelf is quite comfortable.
Chloe: Is it not a game?
Penny: Please explain yourself, slightly tinier furball.
Chloe: A game to see how long it takes me to get her to put it down and give me chin scratches?
Penny: Hmmm. Interesting. I may consider this. What about the game where we prevent the human from standing?
Chloe: I'm still winning.
How much attention is too much? Need we even ask?
Penny: The human knows she must dote upon me regularly if she wishes to go about her day. Plus, I am an integral part of her routine! I guard the toilet from water thieves!
Penny: I also guard the computer, to make sure those birds I saw that one time for two minutes don't escape from it!
Chloe: Well, I, I...I give her a very important belly to rub! Her hands could freeze to death otherwise!
Penny: Whatever. I heard you purring during it.
Penny: What was that? The food scoop?
Chloe: Food? Food?
Penny: I'm starving over here, its about time.
Chloe: Food?
Penny: As yes dinner! That smells delicious.
Chloe: Food!
The intelligent adult feline can tolerate only so much snuggy-wuggums.
Penny: Ugh. Human snuggles. There's nothing worse.
Chloe: I think human snuggles are kind of nice. I think you're nice!
Penny: Shut up.
Nothing the human can read is more interesting than you. Therefore, when the human picks up a book, magazine, or newspaper, you may best assist him or her by interposing your magnificent Self between the page and humanity.
Penny: Why does she do that? She lays around for hours at a time and stares at nothing and giggles or cries at it like a moron. Although, the shelf is quite comfortable.
Chloe: Is it not a game?
Penny: Please explain yourself, slightly tinier furball.
Chloe: A game to see how long it takes me to get her to put it down and give me chin scratches?
Penny: Hmmm. Interesting. I may consider this. What about the game where we prevent the human from standing?
Chloe: I'm still winning.
How much attention is too much? Need we even ask?
Penny: The human knows she must dote upon me regularly if she wishes to go about her day. Plus, I am an integral part of her routine! I guard the toilet from water thieves!
Penny: I also guard the computer, to make sure those birds I saw that one time for two minutes don't escape from it!
Chloe: Well, I, I...I give her a very important belly to rub! Her hands could freeze to death otherwise!
Penny: Whatever. I heard you purring during it.
Penny: What was that? The food scoop?
Chloe: Food? Food?
Penny: I'm starving over here, its about time.
Chloe: Food?
Penny: As yes dinner! That smells delicious.
Chloe: Food!
May 8, 2012
This is a (humorous) manual written by cats for cats. How to live and exact proper “ownership” upon your human pet is a just description of this work. Anyone having spent time with a cat will quickly recognize their compatriot / nemesis’s personalities within these pages.
I found this humorous at first but, soon after reading nearly two-thirds the way through the book, I began having frightening thoughts; what if this is all true. It certainly seems to fit in with feline proclivities. Could they be our replacements for the master race? Tuna for thought…
This is a very clever look at how much our feline family loves and protects us. If you own a cat don't let them catch you reading this. We don't want to tip them off that we know... Just buy an extra copy and leave it lying around the house to screw with their fine dignities. You'll need the extra copy...I'm sure they will destroy the decoy.
While it is filled (for such a short book) with many topics of interest, I am surprised that there isn’t a section on “giving the cat a human-type bath”. This is the most humiliating / dangerous thing a cat can endure. I wonder why the author neglected this angle.
Of particular interest, found in the ‘Computer’ section of this book is…PawSense, a genuine anti-cat computer program: http://www.bitboost.com/pawsense/
I didn’t know such clever programing existed.
Devlin
I found this humorous at first but, soon after reading nearly two-thirds the way through the book, I began having frightening thoughts; what if this is all true. It certainly seems to fit in with feline proclivities. Could they be our replacements for the master race? Tuna for thought…
This is a very clever look at how much our feline family loves and protects us. If you own a cat don't let them catch you reading this. We don't want to tip them off that we know... Just buy an extra copy and leave it lying around the house to screw with their fine dignities. You'll need the extra copy...I'm sure they will destroy the decoy.
While it is filled (for such a short book) with many topics of interest, I am surprised that there isn’t a section on “giving the cat a human-type bath”. This is the most humiliating / dangerous thing a cat can endure. I wonder why the author neglected this angle.
Of particular interest, found in the ‘Computer’ section of this book is…PawSense, a genuine anti-cat computer program: http://www.bitboost.com/pawsense/
I didn’t know such clever programing existed.
Devlin
September 23, 2012
For years, my family has semi-joked that our beloved cat Skipper Lee Jr. left behind an instruction manual for all the cats that came into our lives after him. After reading this book, I now firmly believe that to be entirely true! This is a delightfully-written instruction book for cats. I do wonder if perhaps it's not the most current version, though, as a few essential tips were missing (e.g., being gravity's helper; sitting on stuff the human is attempting to move; etc.). But, as the author (or should I say, "human facilitator") pointed out in the forward, the copy of the manual he found may not be the "official" version. I truly enjoyed this book - laughing aloud as I realized my cats have memorized it already and have consistently and perfectly executed its instructions. It would appear some have mastered certain skills better than others. For example, Jane was the queen of hiding from vet visits and spitting out her medicine, while Marigold can kill a newspaper better than any cat I know. To know that it was "found" in my beloved home state of Arkansas only further supports my belief that Skip indeed had a copy that he brought with him in the move to Texas. This is an absolute must-read for anyone who is blessed enough to have a cat in their lives. By the way, I've come to realize I'm one of the suckers the book so often mentioned...but, I'm happy to be one!
June 10, 2014
This advice manual for cats by cats is being shared for the first time by Michael Ray Taylor after finding it hidden on his mother's computer by her cat. Its topics include change, helping humans, gifts, reading, forbidden rooms, waking the human, the death of the newspaper, the vacuum cleaner, and more. This book is pretty funny and I found myself laughing out loud loud at times. Cleo sounds very much like my own cat, Finn, when it comes to some things! If he could talk these are some of the words he would probably say to me. The tricks section rings a bell because I was just reading an article about "teaching" your cat tricks with food incentives. Let's just say that these days, Finn doesn't put up with it!
January 30, 2012
This is definitely a book for cat lovers and owners - if you're neither, don't even bother reading it because you simply won't get it.
I liked that the angle for the book was different - a cat manual written by cats for cats.
It's filled with humour and good advice for fellow cats, and of course gives us lowly humans insight into why cats do the things they do.
Cute book, I would recommend this as a gift for any cat owner or lover.
I liked that the angle for the book was different - a cat manual written by cats for cats.
It's filled with humour and good advice for fellow cats, and of course gives us lowly humans insight into why cats do the things they do.
Cute book, I would recommend this as a gift for any cat owner or lover.
October 7, 2016
It's about cats, but it is not a manual.
The cat stories in this book are like cute little posts to a personal blog about a person's pet. Nothing special. It was a free ebook. I wouldn't pay for these anecdotes.
The cat stories in this book are like cute little posts to a personal blog about a person's pet. Nothing special. It was a free ebook. I wouldn't pay for these anecdotes.
September 27, 2018
This is an adorable and funny, little book. I could picture one of my cats doing all the things in this book advising cats how to behave. Such as putting your paw over your human’s hand when they reach for the computer mouse. I laughed so hard at some of the cat advice written here. If you love cats, you’ll love this book.
October 24, 2020
Cat gospel
July 16, 2025
Cute, light and funny book that cat lovers will appreciate. It's a manual for cats written from the point-of-view of cats as if they're the ones writing the manual. It was a quick and fun read. I think my cat must have read this manual!
Read
March 1, 2022Only read a couple of chapters. Too much ableism & just wasn’t funny to me.
February 28, 2022
This book is absolutely delightful! If you are a cat lover, you will relate to every single, hilarious point. If you aren't, prepare to be educated in the wonder of the feline.
If you want to feel good after reading something, this is the book for you.
If you want to feel good after reading something, this is the book for you.
December 22, 2012
I loved this book and laughed many times. Obviously this man has been owned - and is owned - by one determined cat at a time or many cats together.
I liked the way it was written as from one cat to another and recognised all the strategies described. :)
Our 20 year old cat, Fuss, has obviously read this manual or a fore-runner and even at her vast age, is still capable of following most of the advice.
I liked the way it was written as from one cat to another and recognised all the strategies described. :)
Our 20 year old cat, Fuss, has obviously read this manual or a fore-runner and even at her vast age, is still capable of following most of the advice.
December 27, 2012
The Cat Manual. Not what it sounds - this is not a manual for owners of cats. This is a manual for cats - by cats - about owning humans.
A gloriously humourous take on what it is to be a cat and what they really think of the 'suckers' that treat them like royalty.
An absolute must read for anyone with feline influences in their lives or homes!
A gloriously humourous take on what it is to be a cat and what they really think of the 'suckers' that treat them like royalty.
An absolute must read for anyone with feline influences in their lives or homes!
July 2, 2014
This was awesome! It is written from the feline perspective and I was laughing throughout. Not only was it hysterical, but it was spot on! My cats could have written this, as they do these things; perhaps they had read the manual! The last chapter was heartwarming and unexpected after the light tone of the previous pages. I recommend this for any human owned by a cat!!
January 29, 2012
This is a story for cat people about the cats that "own" us!
Very cute story for all cat lovers! I read this kindle edition in one sitting and laughed at so many parts. There is no way you could read this and not find numerous incidents that relate to any cats you have known and loved!
Very cute story for all cat lovers! I read this kindle edition in one sitting and laughed at so many parts. There is no way you could read this and not find numerous incidents that relate to any cats you have known and loved!
December 8, 2012
Great humor. Very relatable to any cat care-taker. My only wish is that I could get a paper copy of this book to present to my elderly mother who does not internet or technology savvy. She would get loads of enjoyment from reading it!
February 25, 2013
I got this today from amazon.com & had to read this asap! This is from a cat's point of view & its pretty true to what or how we believe cats think. Its definately worth the read. Took me no time to finish it.
January 30, 2012
Pretty cute, could've been longer. Cats def have more quirks than those written about in this book.
March 19, 2012
A very cute tounge and cheek book. Light easy read
September 11, 2012
This was super cute and funny. If you are a cat lover you will definitely love this book and understand a lot of the references.
November 22, 2012
Anyone who has ever been owned by a cat will identify with this book 100%. It details how deviously the cat's mind works in its attempt to rule the planet
January 23, 2013
This book is brilliantly funny and extremely entertaining, where you see yourself in most of the situations mentioned! Highly recommended if you are a cat person and know cats well!
June 11, 2013
Have a cat? It's most likely read this. Any cat owner wil laugh, cry, and swear while reading this very true kindle ebook.
March 2, 2014
This humourous book is written by cats for cats. From a human's perspective, it is truly a delight to read! Cat lovers will love this!
October 7, 2022
Princess Fuzzypants here: a well written tome for the young cat who needs advice on the care and training of their human minions. It is quite full of excellent details that will assist the young cat. If you enjoyed the Dear Kitten series of tv ads of a few years ago or enjoy my daily blog on Facebook, Princess Fuzzypants, you will find this to your tastes.
And do not fear if your human should happen to read it. It will simply explain to them what is expected and how they might best serve. Being dense creatures at times, any assistance in this matter will be appreciated. But they are endearing too so please give them some slack if they require remedial training. They are only human.
Five purrs and two paws up.
And do not fear if your human should happen to read it. It will simply explain to them what is expected and how they might best serve. Being dense creatures at times, any assistance in this matter will be appreciated. But they are endearing too so please give them some slack if they require remedial training. They are only human.
Five purrs and two paws up.
August 2, 2020
This was a fun read. But I think the manuscript found by the author must have been missing some pages, because there's not a thing here about a subject that looms large in many cats' lives: food. No debate on wet vs. dry? No techniques for convincing the humans that one hasn't already been fed today? No thoughts on what inorganic or traditionally non-food items can/should be consumed by the cat? Definitely an oversight on somebody's part.
December 29, 2017
Every cat owner will find something to smile about
You certainly do not want to spend a lot of money on this very short and only occasionally amusing book but I found it was a nice 'palette-cleanser' between other, more serious reads. There are worse ways to spend (part of) an hour.
You certainly do not want to spend a lot of money on this very short and only occasionally amusing book but I found it was a nice 'palette-cleanser' between other, more serious reads. There are worse ways to spend (part of) an hour.
January 4, 2017
I love cats... I love every kind of cat
Though fast, this was an enjoyable read. I could see multiple similarities to my own grumpy pretty kitty. I'm glad I took the time to read this.
Though fast, this was an enjoyable read. I could see multiple similarities to my own grumpy pretty kitty. I'm glad I took the time to read this.
June 15, 2017
Very Funny Look At Cat -Think!
This is a very funny and accurate examination of how cats rule our lives. It is nicely done with the appropriate amount of sarcasm. This would be a fun gift for any cat lover. There were several times I laughed out-loud and woke up my cat!
This is a very funny and accurate examination of how cats rule our lives. It is nicely done with the appropriate amount of sarcasm. This would be a fun gift for any cat lover. There were several times I laughed out-loud and woke up my cat!
July 15, 2017
Okay!
So I bought this awhile back when it was free (Hey Im a sucker for free kindle books)
And I just now got around to reading it thinking that it was an Information type book. Don't get me wrong it is, just with some humor thrown it!
It was a quick and funny read!
So I bought this awhile back when it was free (Hey Im a sucker for free kindle books)
And I just now got around to reading it thinking that it was an Information type book. Don't get me wrong it is, just with some humor thrown it!
It was a quick and funny read!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 194 reviews