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Portuguese Irregular Verbs #2

The Finer Points Of Sausage Dogs

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Readers who fell in love with Precious Ramotswe, proprietor of The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency, now have new cause for celebration in the protagonist of these three light-footed comic novels by Alexander McCall Smith. Welcome to the insane and rarified world of Professor Dr. Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld of the Institute of Romance Philology. Von Igelfeld is engaged in a never-ending quest to win the respect he feels certain he is due-a quest which has the tendency to go hilariously astray. In The Finer Points of Sausage Dogs, Professor Dr. Von Igelfeld is mistaken for a veterinarian and not wanting to call attention to the faux pas, begins practicing veterinary medicine without a license. He ends up operating on a friend's dachshund to dramatic and unfortunate effect. He also transports relics for a schismatically challenged Coptic prelate, and is pursued by marriage-minded widows on board a Mediterranean cruise ship.

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First published January 1, 2004

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About the author

Alexander McCall Smith

669 books12.7k followers
Alexander McCall Smith is the author of the international phenomenon The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency series, the Isabel Dalhousie Series, the Portuguese Irregular Verbs series, and the 44 Scotland Street series. He is professor emeritus of medical law at the University of Edinburgh in Scotland and has served on many national and international bodies concerned with bioethics. He was born in what is now known as Zimbabwe and he was a law professor at the University of Botswana. He lives in Scotland. Visit him online at www.alexandermccallsmith.com, on Facebook, and on Twitter.

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5 stars
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175 (2%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 666 reviews
Profile Image for Jason Koivu.
Author 7 books1,408 followers
January 6, 2015
Professor Dr. von Igelfeld gets no respect, no respect I tell ya!

And it's no wonder! The height of his academic career has been the publication of an impossibly long tome on a very specific foreign language linguistic construct. It's his bloody life's work and no one wants to read it! So, when he's mistaken for a veterinarian and asked to preform surgery on a dachshund, a ridiculous dog if ever there was one, his ego wins the battle over common sense. Yes, dachshunds were indeed harmed in the writing of this book.

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Although The Finer Points of Sausage Dogs relies more on slapstick to drive the humor than its predecessor in the series, Portuguese Irregular Verbs, that slapstick is akin to Candide and thus it's still quite clever. Indeed I found this sequel to be just as funny as the first in the series. The brand of humor might be a bit academic for some, but I found it to be a fine follow up!

Profile Image for Phrynne.
4,034 reviews2,725 followers
March 3, 2018
This is not my favourite of Alexander McCall Smith's series but it is still written in his delightful way with lots of humour and gentle mocking of people's foolishness.

In The Finer Points of Sausage Dogs it is the turn of Professor Dr. Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld and his colleagues at the Institute of romantic Philology in Germany to be exposed to view with all their faults and foibles. Von Igelfeld has a very high opinion of his own abilities and his standing in the world which leads him into a series of unfortunate scrapes.

I must admit that although I usually share the author's sense of humour the first story about the sausage dog went too far. Luckily the dog is redeemed later in the tale of Santa Claus' bones. The events on the cruise ship were the funniest part and even rang almost true!

One thing you can always count on with this author is impeccable writing and a shrewd understanding of human nature. His books are always worth reading.
Profile Image for Julian Worker.
Author 44 books453 followers
January 28, 2022
This is an excellent story about Professor Dr Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld of the institute of Romance Philology whose quest to gain respect for his intellectual interests goes awry in a hilarious number of ways.

The professor has written a book on Portuguese Irregular Verbs, but somehow ends up lecturing to a number of fellow intellectuals on Sausage Dogs. This isn't too bad, but then the pretence means he has to operate on a sausage dog involved in a car accident and the poor canine ends up with only one leg. Poor sausage dog, who is owned by von Igelfeld's underling Unterholzer.

Many years previously, von Igelfeld lost out to Unterholzer for the love of a woman and so it's the last straw when Unterholzer writes a critical appraisal of Portuguese Irregular Verbs in a learned journal. Von Igelfeld tries to obtain revenge by turning Unterholzer's psychologist against him, but then feels guilty about doing so and confesses with surprising results.

You can imagine that things will not go smoothly when a Coptic Patriarch in Italy asks von Igelfeld to look after the bones of St Nicholas of Myra. Von Igelfeld manages to insult The Pope to his face in the Vatican Library before the bones disappear in a most unusual way.

Finally, Von Igelfeld goes on a cruise to give lectures on philology and attracts the attention of many widows on his way to Naples where he jumps ship without telling anyone except a Neapolitan taxi driver and is presumed 'lost at sea' as a result.

This book is funny with at least half-a-dozen hilarious situations written in a wonderfully understated way. Unlike Updike and Rushdie, and in a similar way to Pratchett, McCall Smith tells his story with humour, subtlety, and without trying to appear clever about it.

Recommended and on to the next one for me.
Profile Image for Cynnamon.
784 reviews130 followers
July 1, 2020
A satirical novel by the author of the Mma Ramotswe-series.

The book is full of British humor, making fun of the quirks of academics, Germans and aristocratic snobbiness.

It wasn’t as amusing as I had been hoping, but I still found it an ok read.

2.5 stars, upgraded.
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Alexander McCall Smith hat die Mma Ramotswe-Reihe geschrieben, die ich wirklich nett finde. Daher habe ich dieses Buch gleich aus dem öffentlichen Bücherschrank mitgenommen, als ich es sah (und wegen seines auffällig abstrusen Titels).

Unser Protagonist Pofessor Dr. Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld ist ein herausragend sozial inkompetenter Akademiker mit einem winzigen und uninteressanten akademischen Spezialgebiet, einem Adelstitel, auf den er sich viel einbildet, und ausserdem ist er bis in die Knochen Deutscher und erfüllt dahingehend alle Klischees.

Der Autor lässt von Igelfeld im Laufe des Romans etliche merkwürdige Szenarien durchstehen, die durch die Eigenschaften des Professors rasch in die völlige Absurdität abgleiten und schon immer wieder auch komisch sind.
Außerdem ist der Roman richtiggehend gespickt mit phantasievollen Namen, die zumeist wirklich passend und auch lustig sind.

Ich fand das Buch jetzt nicht gar so erheiternd wie ich gehofft hatte, aber ab und an konnte es mir schon ein leises Schmunzeln entlocken.

Gesamturteil: nett, lesbar, aber nicht dringend empfehlenswert.
2,5 Sterne, aufgerundet.
Profile Image for Cyndi.
2,450 reviews122 followers
December 30, 2017
Warning: although this is a funny book with a pompous professor, it has an extreme bit with animal cruelty. So, if you are sensitive to that, even when it is supposed to be Monty Python funny, skip this book.
That being said, there are some funny parts, especially the last skit with the professor on a cruise with husband hunting matrons.
Profile Image for Lynn Pribus.
2,129 reviews80 followers
November 9, 2016
What a disappointment. I like many of his other books which are populated (mostly) by likeable characters.

This one is about an insufferable man who, instead of confessing he isn't a vet when invited to a convention of veteranarians, goes ahead and operates on a poor dachshund, unnecessarily amputating three legs. I tried to persist, but in the next chapter he is justifying the mutilation. Too much of a dog lover to persist.

What a jerk!

Profile Image for Gill.
Author 1 book15 followers
April 8, 2011
Humour is so individual.
A review I read said "If you like Mma Ramotswe you will hate Professor Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld. Well, sorry I love the Ladies Detective Agency series, but I also enjoy this series. I admire Mma R's independence, good sense and humanity, but I also have a sympathy for poor Igelfeld's bruised self-esteem and need for constant recognition, although in one of these stories he seems to discover another side to himself and his need for recognition and respect.
My son laughs uproariously at "The Office" series on TV, whereas they leave me not only unmoved by laughter but also irritated so that I leave the room. My husband feels similarly about this series I think, and certainly is not tickled by their gentle humour as I am. There is something very German, very old-fashioned and very human in this character. He would never be my friend in life, but I have a sympathy for him, and find his tales interesting and amusing.
This is an easy book to read, and a slim volume with nicely crafted chapters, easily digested.
Profile Image for Julie.
1,974 reviews
August 26, 2016
Oh wow, I can't take it, Professor von Igelfeld is too funny. These books are short, sweet and such a riot. I usually CANNOT sympathize with self-important people, but him? I can very easily. He has me laughing out loud with the embarrassing, ridiculous situations he gets himself into and his constant belief that life is just not fair and he deserves better than his colleagues - because, after all, he DID write THE book on Portuguese Irregular Verbs. (Oh my gosh, I love it. After a surgery sadly gone wrong (I won't tell the specifics), he woefully views a one-legged sausage dog and says "He can roll. He can get around by rolling.". If you're not chuckling at that, don't finish the book.)
Profile Image for Mark.
357 reviews11 followers
May 31, 2010
The second, and perhaps best, of the three novellas in the Professor Doktor von Igelfeld trilogy (published together in Britain, but not here, under the felicitous title "The 2 1/2 Pillars of Wisdom"). Little gems of academic satire!

Here's a snippet for my academic friends (they'll get it):

He sighed. It was not easy maintaining one's position as the author of Portuguese Irregular Verbs. Not only was there Unterholzer (and all that tiresome business with is dog), but von Igelfeld also had to cope with the distinct unhelpfulness of the Librarian and with the unmitigated philistinism of his publishers. Then there was the awkward attitude of the university authorities, who recently had shown the temerity to ask him to deliver a series of lectures to undergraduate students. This had almost been the last straw for von Igelfeld, who had been obliged to remind them of just who he was. That had caused them to climb down, and the Rector had even sent a personal letter of apology, but von Igelfeld felt that the damage was done. If German professors could be asked to lecture, as if they were mere instructors, then the future of German scholarship looked perilous. He had heard that one of his colleagues had even been asked whether he proposed to write another book, when he had already written one some ten years previously! And the alarming thing was that people were taking this lying down and not protesting at the outrageous breach of academic freedom which it unquestionably was. What would have happened if the University of Koenigsberg had asked Kant whether he proposed to write another ? Kant would have treated such a question with the contempt it deserved.


Sound like anyone?
Profile Image for Ezgi.
319 reviews38 followers
August 30, 2023
McCall Smith harika bir karakter yaratmış, Portekizce Düzensiz Fiiller’in yazarı. Bencilliği, egosu ve saflıklarıyla antipatik olduğu derecede kendini sevdiren bir karakter profesör Igelfeld. Karakterlere alıştığım için olsa gerek ikinci kitabı daha çok sevdim. Psikanalizi, kiliseyi, akademiyi hatta dulları tiye alıyor. Yanlışlıklar üzerine kurduğu romanda sık sık seyahat edip ilginç olaylar yaşatıyor. Igelfeld’in kıskançlığı ve kibri bu olaylara atılmasına neden oluyor. Hiç ilgisini çekmemesine rağmen Amerika’yı arkadaşından önce görebilmek için sosis köpekler hakkında konferansa gitmesiyle başlıyor roman. Akademinin mış gibi yapmak üzerine kurulu tavrı absürt ama bir o kadar gerçekçiydi. Papa ile yaşadıkları, cruise turu çok daha komik sahnelere sahip. Mizahi roman okumak isteyenler için hazine. Çünkü karakter Portekizce Düzensiz Fiiller’in yazarı.
Profile Image for Brian Griffith.
Author 7 books335 followers
September 30, 2020
This book is absolutely ridiculous, and it's dangerous to read. I tried reading it aloud to my dad, who was trying to recover from a stroke, and was warned of what happened to other heart patients. The tale has a timeless quality of vintage idiocy. The license McCall Smith takes in ridiculing people's cultural and professional quirks is goes way beyond any genial ribbing. This is a casual wickedness that annihilates the separation between mutually ludicrous souls.
Profile Image for Jessica.
Author 26 books5,912 followers
November 18, 2019
I'd never read Portuguese Irregular Verbs, but I just took some of my dad's old audiobooks off hands, and this was one of them. And hilarious! So hilarious! And weird! SO WEIRD. From Herr Doktor von Igelfeld being mistaken for a professor of veterinary science, to him making friends with the Pope, this crotchety German man seems to fall into the most extraordinary circumstances, and to come out . . . just as crotchety as ever!
Profile Image for Hákon Gunnarsson.
Author 29 books162 followers
March 1, 2019
This is the second book in the series about German professor Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld, but the first one I read, and I have to admit I almost gave up on it. Humor can dance on the line between taste and tastelessness. Early on in this book there is a scene which to me stepped over that line in such a way that I almost gave up on the whole thing. If I ever meet the author in person, my first question will be:

How could you do that to that poor sausage dog?

But of course there is a point to the scene, as one finds out later in the book. And McCall Smith continues to make the professor Dr. Igelfeld as redicilous as in the first book. The professor is a petty, small minded scholar who thinks the world of himself. But he is funny, and that’s why I continued with this series.
Profile Image for Chris Pugh.
10 reviews
November 4, 2019
I thought this was a dreadful book. Gruesome and disturbing. I can't imagine anyone enjoying it.
Profile Image for Ayanna.
116 reviews4 followers
October 8, 2024
This was quite the peculiar book filled with dry humor and the most absurd plot points. Though it is apparently second in a trilogy, a fact I learned only after beginning this book, it read fine as a stand alone novella. Lovers of dachshunds beware!
Profile Image for David Haines.
Author 10 books135 followers
January 29, 2025
This book was so much fun! I’m loving this series!
Profile Image for Kelsey Keil.
145 reviews1 follower
May 6, 2025
Except for one short, disturbing scene and a few minor references throughout the book, this had nothing to do with sausage dogs at all and I absolutely hated it.
Profile Image for Jenny.
263 reviews15 followers
October 7, 2022
A fun series. Reminds me of Three Men in a Boat and Diary of a Nobody
Profile Image for Syrdarya.
292 reviews5 followers
July 24, 2020
I was trying to stock up on Alexander McCall Smith books and bought this one, not realizing at the time that it was the second in the series, but I don't think that hurt my reading at all.

Professor Dr. Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld is a rather arrogant professor of Portuguese philology at a German university who falls into all sorts of funny circumstances. Needing to visit the United States before a colleague beats him to it, he ends up lecturing a crowd of veterinarians, then ends up doing emergency veterinary surgery (that incident was actually very upsetting for me to read). He takes a trip to Italy with some friends and winds up protecting relics for an Eastern Orthodox leader. He receives an offer to lecture on a cruise and becomes the object of all the widows' and other single women's desires.

It was a very funny book. Even the upsetting incident did cause me to laugh a little, but it was not something I expected in one of McCall Smith's books, it was uncomfortable, and is the reason I rated the book much lower than I have rated any of his other books. The humor about arrogant professors and how universities operate was spot on, and I think he poked fun at some German cultural aspects in a way that hits home (I come from a part-German family which is involved in German philological academia, and when I was once a graduate student I witnessed additional politics of universities and the professors within them). Even the way von Igelfeld behaved on the cruise rang so true I almost wonder if he was on that one cruise I went on with my mother decades ago....
Profile Image for Kelsey.
198 reviews1 follower
April 20, 2017
I get why people would find this 0% funny, so I pretty much never recommend it to anyone. But, if you are interested in absurdly comic yet not vulgar vignettes about a self-important, socially inept German Romance philologist, this book is for you.

The book summary uses the word "light-footed." I would never have thought of this word, but it's perfectly selected.

'We're heading north,' said his host. 'We'll show you a typical hog operation.'
'Most intriguing,' said von Igelfeld. 'I am always interested in... ' He paused. What was he interested in? Philology? Portuguese verbs? 'I am always interested in everything.' (13)


'Mg2H20 + HgSO4,' explained the Director, pointing to a curiously coloured powder.
'Hg2?' asked Leflar.
'MgCO2,' responded the Director.
'O,' said von Igelfeld. 'H.'
'O?' asked Leflar.
Von Igelfeld stroked his chin. 'Perhaps.'
'Definitely,' interjected the Director. 'H20 + NaCl3.' (28)
Profile Image for Lisa.
461 reviews
May 2, 2016
I read this series out of order, starting with #2 in the Portuguese Irregular Verbs series. I have read many of McCall Smith's books in the #1 Ladies Detective Agency series and in the 44 Scotland Street series and found them light-hearted and funny. This one is just tedious. It is a short novel about a German professor, Dr. Moritz-Maria who is an expert on the Portuguese language. Dr. Moritz-Maria waffles from arrogance to insecurity and gets himself in some strange situations because of it; including a case of mistaken identity at a lecture in Arkansas and being invited to lecture on a cruise to uninterested passengers.
Profile Image for Sandy.
48 reviews
March 17, 2015
I have always enjoyed books by this author. I will confess I did not finish this one. The "unfortunate effect" of the unlicensed operation on the dachshund (as referenced on the back cover of the book) was absolutely dreadful. I read of the surgery with my own sausage dog next to me and had horrible nightmares that night. While the book might have appealed to me absent this incident, I could not proceed. I will have to stick to the cute campyness of the Mma Ramotswe books.
Profile Image for Desislava Filipova.
362 reviews56 followers
March 7, 2018
Втората част за приключенията на професор Морис Мария фон Игелфелд даже на моменти е по-забавна от първата, то ще попадне в различни ситуации и ще трябва да реагира своевременно на всяко предизвикателство. Въпреки сериозността, с която приема своята академична дейност и собствена значимост, в него по-скоро има нещо чаровно, отколкото дразнещо.
34 reviews
June 26, 2012
Maybe I missed something by not reading the first in the series, but I couldn't find a plot nor could I manage to get interested in the story.
Profile Image for Aimee.
487 reviews2 followers
June 6, 2017
Funnier than the first book, but more like a nice diversion than laugh-out-loud hilarious. I listened to it through Audible and Hugh Laurie's narration adds a lot to the enjoyment; plus the fact that these are short stories means it's easy to break them into small chunks to listen to for an hour or so at a time - great for the commute.
Profile Image for Karen.
15 reviews1 follower
September 26, 2021
I would have like this book a lot more if there actually was more about sausage dogs. Unfortunately their seems to be gratuitous violence against one dog that is a bit difficult to read. The main character is not likeable which is unfortunate. It is a quick read and some parts are really funny but I much prefer to read about women detectives in the Kalahari.
Profile Image for Carol Bakker.
1,542 reviews135 followers
April 17, 2021
Professor Dr Moritz-Maria is growing on me. These are funny, quirky-odd episodes in the life of a self-important academic.

All the dilemmas could have been remediated by simply owning up to the truth; however, the humor is when von Igelfeld squirms his way through a sticky situation. AMS loves to poke fun at psychoanalysts; those pokes always make me snort.

This series has set on my shelf for years. But I didn't read them until I had access to the delightful audio.
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