Give It Up!: My Year of Learning to Live Better with Less

by Mary Carlomagno

“Refreshing, inspiring, and honest….One book I’m not going to be ‘giving up’ anytime soon.”
—Nicole Williams, author of Earn What You’re Worth Give It Up! is author Mary Carlomagno’s inspiring chronicle of her 365 days spent learning to live better with less—when she decided to give up one modern convenience ( elevators) or indulgence ( alcohol) every month for a year. A joyous celebration of voluntary simplicity, Give It Up! offers a solution and a liberating new outlook to shopaholics, jaded consumers, and spirituality seekers overwhelmed by the unnecessary clutter in their lives, in the most uplifting self-help guide to better living since Gretchen Rubin’s The Happiness Project .

Genres: Nonfiction, Personal Development, Self Help, Memoir, Biography, Finance, Biography Memoir

208 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2005

About the author

Mary Carlomagno is a bestselling author, organizer, speaker and spokesperson specializing in helping individuals and groups embrace simplicity in everyday life. She is one of the nation’s leading experts on organizing and a frequent contributor on national television, radio and print.

Reviews

[Joy · Rating 1 out of 5]

Take the content found in an average issue of Real Simple, drain away most of the common sense, and throw in a wannabe-Sex in the City lifestyle and you'd have this book. The author gives up one thing per month (ranging from coffee to chocolate) to learn about "living better with less" but she only manages to draw the most shallow of conclusions from her thought experiment. And I don't think most people will be able to relate with her particular lifestyle. For example, one of her particular challenges was giving up cabs, because she was spending $60/week on them.

Anyway, an interesting idea, but a more thoughtful author would have made a world of a difference.

[Mica Humes · Rating 1 out of 5]

I thought this book would be an interesting exploration of living well with less. Most people know their bad habits and would want to try changing something that isn't good for them or change something to enhance their life. The author chose some interesting things to give up when knowing full well she won't permanently give up chocolate or coffee because those are things in her life that really make her happy. It wasn't about a full life it was more about avoidance for 30 days.

I thought the idea of giving up taking a cab all the time in NYC was an interesting idea, but spending all of the "saved" money on shoes and pedicures seemed excessive and ridiculous to me. Replacing one service with consumerism/a different service didn't make a lot of sense to me. This replacement theory is pretty much what happens throughout the whole book and most of the time it doesn't enhance the life of the author in any sustainable way.

[Lisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was recommended to me by my stepmom. It was a quick read, as it's less than 200 pages and a small book (in actual size). The author gave up 1 thing a month that she LOVED! The thing I liked most about it was that I discovered I really don't have that much stuff that would affect my life as much as it did hers. For example it wouldn't greatly affect my life if I gave up alcohol, shopping, eating out, coffee or elevators...for a month or longer. The one thing she didn't give up that would be hard for me...the computer! ;o)

[Kate · Rating 1 out of 5]

What a crappy book. A brilliant idea taken and ruined by a shallow author who learned next to nothing from her experiment. How hard is it to really give up buying shoes for a month? Seriously. LAME.

[Stephanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good fast read and very inspirational. I don't need to work on many of the things Mary did (we all have our different habits) but nevertheless, this book inspired me to make a list and give up my own habitual stuff for a month (or maybe more) at a time. I'm already on my program. I highly recommend this book as a motivator.

I liked the chapter on elevators. I may try to do that. I could not relate to her cellphone chapter, though. I am never on my phone and cannot understand people who are constantly talking on the phone or why they even want to. But the whole point of this book is the process and trials of the things you as an individual get very wrapped up in.

Some reviewers here got all insensed about Mary's shallowness. I too picked up on that. Since she lives in New York I couldn't believe she wasn't already taking the subway everywhere anyway (what was up with that?!). And when she was doing more walking but somehow couldn't bring herself to wear sensible shoes to and from work (and put the cute ones on when she got there), well at that point I nearly threw the book across the room. I thought, what is this chick's problem? At times I thought, she must be an extremely shallow person. However, this is not ultimately the point of this book. It's a self-help book and I believe that it actually can help oneself.

[John · Rating 4 out of 5]

Before I opened the book, I'd thought Carlomagno's focus would be along the lines of Suze Orman-like advice - saving significant money by removing lots of "little things" from one's routine. There is that in certain essays (dining out, taking cabs, etc.), but the main focus of examining how these features (for lack of a better term) came to take on such a place in her life makes the book unique. She uses each month as an effective Time Out to re-center herself in that area, rather than a self-congratulatory: "See how I've 'conquered' this one, too!" She goes back to dining out, and she does drink alcohol, it's that she's gained an ability to say no to going along with the group (drinking to intoxication) or taking the easy way out (getting in the habit of making lunch, rather than buying it).

I'm going to give a special award here: knowing exactly when to stop! She manages to use her monthly word count to say exactly what needs to be said, so that the essays that resonated worked incredibly well, and the others never went so far as causing me to skip to the next chapter.

For those who might think, "I don't eat out, take cabs, etc., and I don't share her lifestyle," she's an interesting person, who writes very well. You'll be pleasantly surprised.

[Sallypants · Rating 1 out of 5]

Most of the other negative reviews have clearly stated what I found cringe-worthy about this book. The author doesn't really give anything up - rather, she spends 12 months sacrifice one thing at a time to explore how much she misses her favorite things. And when she says 'sacrifice' that usually means finding a substitute, mooching off of others, or feeling morally superior for living without some completely unneccesary luxury for a couple weeks. No great revelations here. This strikes me as a very pre-recession book. I can't imagine anyone publishing this during a time when people are really having to live without things like health insurance, mortgage payments, and college tuition. Its a frivolous experiment that yields no real wisdom. Normally I am a sucker for these types of year-long experiements, but in this case, the only thing that sucked was the book.

[Jenny · Rating 3 out of 5]

Okay, so this book had a very interesting premise. I like the idea of trying to live without something for a while. I honestly cannot imagine my life without tv, chocolate, or diet coke (diet dr. pepper as of late). However because there's 150 or so pages and 12 sections (one for each month) there's just not enough depth into anything. And some of the sections seemed pointless--like when she gave up chocolate...she regretted doing it and swore she wouldn't do it again. Well, that makes me really happy I read about that for the past 30 pages. Of them all, I thought the last, multitasking had the best depth.

[CharityJ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Despite quite a few poor reviews, I liked this book. Yes, it's short, the ending is abrupt, the "aha!" moment you expect at the end never comes, but taking the book for what it is: one woman's story of sacrificing something each month, it has merit. The author doesn't beat the reader over the head with her life-changing epiphanies but who needs that anyway? It's inspired me to weed/pare down areas in my own life and that really is the point.

[BookOfCinz · Rating 2 out of 5]

Very surface level.

I think the title was a little misleading for me. As someone who is actively trying to live with less I thought this book would have provided a more in-depth look on how to do so.

[Colleen · Rating 1 out of 5]

I agree with some of the (negative) reviewers' comments on this book. The idea is good, but I was expecting some kind of transformation. It seems like the author learned something each month, but it certainly wasn't something that would change her life much. I imagine after this year, the author's lifestyle changed a little: she probably took the stairs more, took fewer taxis, maybe shopped a little more responsibly, but overall I was just expecting something more. It was almost like the author didn't really want to change anything, that she was just giving up things so she could write a book about the experience. And I agree with the reviewer who thought the book lacked depth. How could anyone summarize what could be such a life-changing year in 150 pages. Although if it had been longer, I probably wouldn't have finished it. Just UGH.

[Gary · Rating 1 out of 5]

When I read the table of contents, I knew immediately I had to read this book. With such sacrifices as shopping, chocolate, and elevators, I knew this could be entertainingly bad. Little did I know. This poor woman doesn't simply avoid making any deep or meaningful observations about her privations: she doesn't even skim across the surface. So shallow there's not even any water to begin with.

[Laura · Rating 1 out of 5]

OK, I'll say it. This woman's life is just far too much of a mess for her to have any business writing a self-help book. Her life consists of endless "drinks with the girls," TV, eating out at every meal, and shopping til she drops. She waltzes through giving up one of these things each month because her baseline was so fucking insane to begin with.

I especially liked the chapter about giving up elevators. Apparently before that particular month should would wait in line for 10 minutes to use the elevator rather than climb a few flights of stairs. Holy shit, who actually lives like that? I can't believe I wasted as much time of my life reading some moron ramble on about her normal elevator routine as she does every day *implementing* the elevator routine. "Does," as in present tense, because after the month was over, she went straight back to it.

After giving up shopping for a month, she comes up with a new rule- two weeks after you buy something, you should return it if you haven't worn it yet. My jaw was on the floor. How about JUST DON'T BUY IT? If in 2 weeks you still want it, go back to the store! Her advice about how to reduce meaningless clutter in your life is to just continue to buy tons of crap, but then return some of it. I'd laugh if it weren't so sad.

I put it down halfway through. Life is too short. I remain amazed that someone this vapid and brainless was given a book deal.

[Erin Donaldson · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a little out-dated, since it's written in 2006. The cell phone month and the shopping month are very different now with the huge influx of social media and so much online shopping. Many of the the vices or things the author gave up didn't really relate to me, but I could see how going without something causes you to notice all the places those things are - chocolate, coffee, alcohol and their social ramifications of doing without. I was able to use the concept to re-think items that I might want to have a fast from.

TV, Cell Phones, Dinning Out, Shopping were a few that I might consider giving up for a month.

The final chapter - she gives up Multi-tasking! I love this! She begins a journey through the month of Uni-Tasking! This is definitely one I want to implement. Having a set schedule or plan of attack for large periods of time - like a day of work, a day off, etc. Scheduling in break time and actually walking away.

All in all a good book and interesting look at the reason we do things and how often they become habits. Doing without can reset your habits a bit and give of insight into why you choose things and maybe you'll actually choose them more consciously instead of just on auto-pilot.

I wish after the final month she would have written a conclusion chapter, it just ended.

[Redheadjen · Rating 2 out of 5]

This would have been awesome to read when I was 24. Most of the inner debate she had was one of a 20something who really hasn't grown into her life yet.

That being said, I really like the premise and the exercise involved. I think we could all benefit from this type of exercise. We all have things in our lives that are unnecessary that we could stand to give up for our health and our wallets.

Glad I grabbed this at the library, but you could also just read through it in the bookstore, as it is a quick read.

[Andrea · Rating 1 out of 5]

In addition to cringing at the poor writing, I could not get into most of this author's "sacrifices"
1. Alcohol
2. Shopping
3. Elevators
4. Newspapers
5. Cell Phones
6. Dining Out
7. Television
8. Taxis
9. Coffee
10. Cursing
11. Chocolate
12. Multi-Tasking

This was not the book I was looking for to inspire me.

[Lori Donehower · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was fascinated by this and wished she would have written a longer book. January was my least favorite month ( I couldn't quite understand why this was soooo hard) however, I am glad I kept on reading.

[Melissa (Distracted by New Grandbaby) · Rating 2 out of 5]

Well, really she didn't learn much of anything. As soon as each month was over, she just went back to living exactly the way she did before.

[Sari Lynn · Rating 2 out of 5]

Interesting premise, but poor execution. I found the author lacking in depth and insight. At the end of this blessedly short book, I found myself thinking, "So what?"

[Judith · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my second time reading this book and although it is a bit dated, I enjoyed Carlomagno's adventures and storytelling.

[Cheryl · Rating 4 out of 5]

I stumbled across this little book on PaperbackSwap and ordered it. I am surprised by the nasty reviews and low scores. Yes, the author could be a character (shopaholic Barbie) on Sex in the City as far as life style, (except no sex talk in this nice little book) maybe the nasty reviewers were jealous? I thought the actual premise of giving up something you really like for a month was interesting and challenging. The book was very readable so I don't know what problem they had with the writing.

One thing I found funny is that cursing was one of the things she gave up! She had some great observations, like how TV, movies etc. (in 2006 no less) made cursing a normal part of conversation and everyone did it, frequently. I hadn't really thought about that but she is right. I remember when you were shocked if someone cursed out loud, listening around me I realize it has become a standard part of conversation, F bombs in almost every sentence from some people. Maybe this tolerance was the beginning of our decline as a society?

Anyway, I liked the idea and the book. Mary made some interesting observations each month and I would be interested to know what she changed permanently in her life after that year. Also, please note that the low ratings were when the book was newer...the 2020 ratings seem to be much higher. Maybe with this Covid19 pandemic people are thinking more and appreciating more simple things?

[Amy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I will echo a lot of the other negative reviews about this book and say that I was really let down by what is an interesting concept....unfortunately written by a shallow and uninteresting author, who drew fairly meaningless conclusions from each monthly experiment. This book reads like if Carrie Bradshaw had to give up one thing per month (what? A month without taxis? A month without chocolate? A month without shopping for shoes and clothes?)

This book essentially amounts to a memoir (no advice or cultural commentary, really). And it’s not one I’d recommend. The author’s voice and commentary were actually offputting in that unaware white urbanite way...like finding a way to mention her weight and counting calories no matter what the focus of the chapter. (Which is just...boring.) Like mentioning that with her well-paid NYC job where she can drink and eat out limitlessly and take taxis and own a car and have no debt she donated $40 to UNICEF this year. (How generous!) Like having to buy semi-practical new shoes (how awful!) for her challenge of taking the subway in NYC (because she’d NEVER TAKEN THE SUBWAY BEFORE).

I think that you (dear reader) are better off just imagining what this book is about based on the blurb. Draw your own conclusions from that. And then skip actually reading it because you will be disappointed.

[Watertiger21 · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was a bit paradoxical for me: I found it to be an entertaining, very quick read with some good, thoughtful portions BUT ultimately I just couldn't relate to the author and her stories. The book takes the reader through one year of the author's life, during which she "sacrifices" and gives up a particular important (to her) thing every month. The book's subtitle gave me the impression it would be about cutting back, learning to live simpler, and living a bit more frugally, but in reality, the author cut out a few specific things from her life as some sort of social experiment and just because she could (with a "this-might-be-fun" mentality). As near as I can tell, she literally only cut things for a month and then went straight back to how she was before the experiment. As a reader who pinches pennies out of necessity, I did not find it particularly amusing to read about how this Gossip-Girl type author casually cut her biweekly $500 clothing shopping sprees of designer clothing one month, cut hundreds of dollars worth of alcohol consumption another month, and thought she was doing well saving money by shopping for groceries at Whole Foods instead of eating out.

However, as I said before, I somehow still found this book to be entertaining. It's humorous, it reads and flows like a story, and it drew me in like other Gossip Girl-type stories do.

[Ron Ruble · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good book. Taking one month at a time, detailing her habits, efforts to change them, and the surprise difficulties (particularly with going phone-free) made the whole book connect with me.

I've gotten worse in some of my bad habits during the COVID-19 self-quarantine. I found a lot of inspiration to break these habits.

Some things I connected with particularly:
- Cell phones: cutting back on frittering away time on social media and constant texts while being available for real emergencies
- Television: avoiding junk TV during lockdown, while still enjoying quality streaming movies and real news
- Multi-tasking: staying on track and getting things done

[Sarah Morgan · Rating 1 out of 5]

After reading The Year of Less by Cait Flanders, I was excited about this book, but sadly this one was a complete disappointment. Given she gave up one thing each month, it seemed in some instances she simply just pushed them off to the next month without any lasting lessons/changes (e.g. rescheduling drinks with friends from January to February) or she scheduled to give the items up in a month that would have less of an inconvenience. For example, not watching TV in a month her favorite sport wasn’t on or not eating chocolate in November since “November with its fall scents and flavors was a natural time to go choco free; manu autumnal substitutes could be sampled.”

[Nichola · Rating 2 out of 5]

There are many self experiment books out there, and many doing-with-less books out there. This was fairly weak in both areas. She did a different experiment giving something up each month to see how her life was impacted and then tried to learn from what she had experienced. But the chapters were very uneven, and the middle of each was filled with thin examples, some random statistics, and clichés. The last few chapters felt phoned in, like she was just trying to fill pages. She may have learned from her year, but not much was passed on here.

[Ellen Ingamells · Rating 3 out of 5]

Maybe it's the age of the book (early 2000's) or maybe it's that the author worked in publishing for so long, but this book is a missed opportunity. 12 month long living with less challenges? Awesome! Tell me 5 stories, cite 3 studies and describe in detail all the steps you had to take to avoid the thing, each success and each learning opportunity. If this book was written in 2021, in the age of narrative-based self-help, it would be three times as long and give you a how to guide at the end of each chapter.

[Katie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I expected more soul searching and acts of actual deprivation that led to permanent life choices. Instead, this was bland and out of touch to most readers.

[Christy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I've been interested in minimalism and this is what was in the library under that call number. Not very impressed with it.

[Helen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderful boo by a young woman who wanted to improve her lifestyle. Each month she gave up one "addiction" or luxury. She demonstrated that it can be done!