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340 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 29, 2011


















The blond boy called out. “I’m terribly sorry, but is there any way we could grab that cage off the porch? We won’t disturb your dalliance.”
Dalliance? Another boy emerged carrying a fuzzy gray creature by the scruff of its neck.
“You can keep making out,” he called out. “We just want the cage. This raccoon is really hard to hold, and she doesn’t like me.”
“At the door, Audrey called, "Are you coming?"
"No, just breathing hard, love." He glanced at her and was rewarded by an outraged glare, followed by, "Oh, my God!”
”Kaldar, if you kill her, please don’t shoot her in the head,” George said, his face cold, as if carved from a glacier. “Raising a body with a shattered brain requires more magic, and I think we can use her corpse to make sure her relatives will get run out of town.”
“Just stay close to us. If we get in trouble, we'll kill everything.”
actual rating 3 stars, 1 star removed for reasons I'll state later. But now that I think of it, this book is closer to 2.5 counting the problem that made me lower my rating. It was so meh.
I avoided reading this book for months and now that I finally read it, I’m relieved. One book left before I start the innkeeper chronicles. I enjoyed the first 2 two books quite a lot so you might wonder, why didn’t I want to read this book? Truth is, I don’t like series in which each book tells the story of someone introduced in the former books. I liked William so it wasn’t a challenge to read Bayou Moon. However, I’m not the biggest fan of Kaldar, he just never interested me. Was I disappointed? Not really, I expected the worst.
Brief summary: if helping her father in this heist means he’ll stay away from her forever, she’ll happily accept. When Kaldar is assigned to retrieve the stolen item, he’ll cross paths with Audrey eventually. Together, they’ll try to find it after her father sold it to God knows who, knowing that the Hand will do anything to have it.
If I wanted to rate this book based on George and Jack alone, I would’ve given it 5 stars. I love those two more than anything in this series. They’re so funny, cute, adorable, lovely, and cute again. I just adore them. However, even though they played an important role in this book, I can’t help but judge it based on Kaldar and Audrey. No, I still don’t like him much. Audrey is cool. I don’t think Ilona can write an annoying heroine and not even a not so badass one even if she can’t fight. It’s one of those cases where the secondary characters though were better than the MCs
This book had all your Ilona Andrews usual stuff, cool heroine, humor, badass scenes, fights, not too much romance.... except for a likable hero. If you liked Kaldar in Bayou Moon, you’ll like him here as well. Even if you didn’t, he might grow on you. However, for me, I ended up disliking him more. The romance even though it was a slow burn as it took them the whole book to get together, it still felt rushed.
Anyway, if you’re looking for something light, Ilona Andrews will never disappoint in delivering an entertaining story with likable characters. However, if you want something memorable that will blow your mind, I don’t recommend this book.
Another thing that annoyed was that the events sometimes were too explained and other times completely rushed. Inconsistency.
It was still enjoyable enough for 3 stars. Until I came across something shocking. I was surprised. I hope it’s not the same in the physical copy and it’s corrected but to say that the 4 who wrote the first 4 books in the new testament are Matthew, Mark, Luke, and James is simply unacceptable. How did 2 authors, 1 agent, and their editor miss this? How did they even get it wrong? What surprises you more is that IA has always relied on mythology from all over the world only to make such intolerable mistake? That and misinterpreting what Jesus Christ said for the sake of the content? Oh no, sorry. I’m so disappointed. Therefore, I removed 1 star from my rating even though it should’ve been more. But now, after posting this review, I don't think it was worth the 3 stars in the first place that aside. It'll be a while before I read the last book.



“How’s it hanging?” Jack asked.
“How am I supposed to answer that?” George looked at him.
“I don’t think Kaldar said anything about that. I guess ‘good’? I don’t get it. What’s hanging anyway?”
George shook his head. “Your stuff, you nimwit.”
His stuff . . . Oh. Ha! “In that case, it’s hanging long!” Jack dissolved into giggles. “Long, get it?”
"Jack didn't fully get Jesus. Audrey tried to explain it ... The Best he could gather was that Jesus lived long ago, told people to be nice, and they killed him for it. At the end, he asked who was Jesus' necromancer and if he was in the Bible, then Kaldar couldn't stop laughing"
When I was little, my grandmother gave me this advice. She said, "Audrey, if you meet a man who is smooth, who says all the right things and knows all the tricks to make a woman happy, you’ve got to ask yourself how he got that way.”
This man was a rogue, not because circumstances forced him to be a criminal but because he was born that way. He was probably conning his mother out of her milk the moment he could grin.
F*ck. F*ck, f*ck, f*ck, f*ck. He had the two wards of the f*cking Marshal of the f*cking Southern Provinces in a stolen car. An entire continent away from where the two of them were supposed to be. In the Broken. Where they had beat up some Broken children. Well, if those children weren’t broken before, they were surely broken now. Fate, that broody, vicious, fickle bitch.
Before this was all over, either they would be lovers or they'd kill each other. Right now, he had no idea which it would be.


