Stick a Geranium in Your Hat and Be Happy

by Barbara Johnson

Pain is inevitable but misery is optional, says Barbara Johnson, and she should know. The survivor of four devastating experiences, Barbara, with the wit of Erma Bombeck, teaches how to find joy in the midst of it all. Her credentials open doors and provide insight to all those who suffer from the difficulties of life. And this million copy edition is proof that the message holds true! Parents of prodigals and those who have suffered the greatest loss of all, the loss of a loved one, have all proclaimed with a smile, This book has saved my life! Barbara's pain began when her husband was in a near-fatal accident. While he slowly recovered from severe, debilitating injures, they lost one son in Vietnam, and another son in an automobile accident. The final blow was losing their third son to the homosexual lifestyle. Through Barbara's final desperate plea to God of Whatever, Lord… a bubble of joy came to replace the elephant she felt sitting on her heart. But life continues and so have the opportunities to practice what she preaches. Barbara was diagnosed with adult-onset diabetes and then most recently a cancerous brain tumor. Despite her difficulties, she continues to model that though pain is inevitable to us all, we can choose to see the flowers instead of the weeds.

Genres: Christian, Humor, Nonfiction, Self Help, Inspirational, Christian Living, Womens

192 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1987

About the author

Librarian note: There are other authors with the same name

Barbara Johnson (1927-2007) died July 2nd, 2007 of cancer (Central Nervous System Lymphoma) after a valiant 6 year fight against the disease. During her illness, she added four more books to her long list of published works, including one that takes humorous pokes at her life with cancer. Affectionately called the “Geranium Lady,” a title taken from her bestselling book, Stick a Geranium in Your Hat and Be Happy, her homespun humor and hope in God in the midst of tragedy, ministered to millions.

A strong Christian woman who relied on her faith in God and her sense of humor to persevere through many devastating experiences, her life was plagued by a string of tragedies. Her husband was in a near fatal accident and slowly recovered from debilitating injuries. She lost one son in Vietnam and another son to a drunk driver. Her third son was estranged from the family while pursuing a homosexual lifestyle. But, she emerged from these experiences having learned that though pain is inevitable, people can choose to pick flowers instead of weeds.

Her compassion extended far beyond the pages of her encouraging books. Wanting to use her own pain to help others, she and her husband Bill founded Spatula Ministries, a unique organization that uses a “spatula of love” to help parents “peel themselves off the ceiling” and begin on the road to recovery. She wrote her first book after reaching the age of 50 and was voted “Celebrity Mom of the Year” for 1996. Prior to being diagnosed with cancer, she toured across the country as a popular conference speaker and part of the "Women of Faith" tour. Her many books have comforted millions of women, bringing them hope and humor in times of distress. She will be missed by many, but her life will live on in her numerous books.

Reviews

[Fergus, Weaver of Autistic Webs · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a book for us old-timers - Boomers and before - who still remember a time when certain Values were Sacred...

Love the subtitle: “PAIN IS INEVITABLE BUT MISERY IS OPTIONAL!”

Barb tells us HOW - maybe not to keep it all together - but to keep LAUGHING and SHARING, when YOUR WORLD IS FALLING APART!

In a warm, heartfelt, traditionally red-blooded book -

Now, THAT’s an achievement for you.

Have you ever been BOWLED OVER, STUNNED, SWEPT AWAY in a Tidal Wave of SHEER SHOCK over a carefully guarded FAMILY SECRET?

Have you ever experienced a PULVERIZING PAIN in your heart over that revelation?

“YES to both,” says the Geranium Lady!

Do you remember a time in your life, Before that Pain, that seemed like a paradisal Rose Garden in comparison to this Darkness?

Barb, the Geranium Lady, saw all of her PARADISE LOST, crashing and burning in ONE AWFUL MOMENT.

Did it ever occur to you that by unearthing more of that pain through a practical, faith-filled common sense approach to it, you might end up LAUGHING about it?

‘Er, no...’

Barb has ACHIEVED that UNACHIEVABLE (In fact, Herculean) TASK.

And so, I guess, have I - and I guess for me that initial TIDAL WAVE of Shock I experienced as a Twenty-year-old now appears, just as my old travelling companion Stephane Mallarme promised it would, like “un si petit rivulet!”

And I can chuckle (a bit) at my absurdly bad/good fortune.

For when I was 20 I fell right to Hell - and then came back. I became like a broken kaleidoscope.

Remember them?

Kaleidoscopes were fun toys, as long as you didn’t drop them on a hard surface. Then these fun toys would just show you a sliding inert jumble of joyless fragments, going listlessly round and round.

Barb and I got turned into broken kaleidoscopes - as have many of my friends - sliding laboriously and aimlessly around our own listless tubes. But there’s hope for us broken ones, too...

Because we can just Stick a Geranium in our Hats when all else fails!

In other words, we can Laugh and Rejoice - for we’ve come out of Hell in One Piece - and THAT’s something to be Proud of.

And Thankful for!

And READING this book is a lot like unburdening everything to the closest friend you’ve got - and seeing her tearfully clutch your wrist, and through her tears chuckle and say...

‘Think THAT’s bad? Wait’ll you hear what HAPPENED TO ME!”

Well, life may seem impossible if you’ve created a stone fortress around your secrets.

But guess what?

Life’s NOT like it seems in the ads and sentimental movies!

It’s a hurting, HURTING world out there.

And We’re all just a tiny, infinitesimally small Fraction of that Mountain of Hurt...

So We CAN share it with the Geranium Ladies we all know. They’ll sob right in sync with us!

And you know what? Barb’s right! We CAN laugh again.

***

Barb’s no longer with us, but WHAT A LEGACY SHE LEFT US.

She was a member of our grandparents’ generation, the Greatest Generation and -yes! - her values were Old Fashioned.

But I HIGHLY RECOMMEND this book to ALL old-fashioned GR readers.

It may touch a nerve here and there in this ‘if it feels good, do it’ world, but the slight pain’s worth it as a price of admission to her world of hurt CONQUERED.

It’s a world in which ALL THE PAIN IS FINALLY UNDER CONTROL - THROUGH FAITH!

Warm, engaging... and side-splittingly FUNNY!

Four loving Stars for sure!

[Heather · Rating 1 out of 5]

Good ideas but I didn't finish because I didn't like her criticism of homosexuality...

[Kimberly Rae · Rating 4 out of 5]

Encouraging and joyful. I have a hard time with the ALL CAPS and extra exclamation points, but I love her perspective, how she has gone through trial and tragedy and chosen joy and hope! Definitely recommend her books to anyone who needs a pick-me-up!

[Janice · Rating 2 out of 5]

I love the concept of choosing to be happy, even with God involved in all things. I had to stop reading because of her views on homosexuality.

[Testi_moni · Rating 3 out of 5]

To give my kids over to Him was really inspirational! To Trust Him to take care!🙏🏻

[Fran · Rating 3 out of 5]

Barbara Johnson is an incrediably funny lady. Her books are witty, yet inspiring. Having had many difficulties in her own life, she lets us know we can choose to pick the flowers instead of the weeds.

[Mary Karpel-Jergic · Rating 2 out of 5]

Can't recall what possessed me to purchase this book - I think it was recommended to me as funny. Unfortunately I didn't find it very funny (our humour is always very particular) and I also found her negative views on homosexuality very difficult to understand.

[Dawn Grace-Jones]

I am learning to be happy.... no matter what.....be happy.....

[Rayline · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good book for those who might be struggling with trials. It is written with a very "Christian" slant. Lots of good blurbs and anecdotes. Upbeat

[Jan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I actually read, where does a mother go to resign?
It did not show up on the list so I’m counting this as my book.

[Sue Lauzon · Rating 2 out of 5]

Please don't slam me for this review as my opinions of this book may not reflect your opinions. I think I am being a bit generous giving this book a 2 star rating. Couldn't really justify a one star rating but at the same time couldn't go any higher either. It wasn't that the book was really bad just some of the author's viewpoints I certainly didn't agree with. I had to keep telling myself that the author was born when life was simpler and times have certainly changed along with how people view certain things in life. I get the basic message that the author is trying to get across in this book (it's really a self help/motivational book). That life is going to throw you curve balls and in time you will get over whatever your troubles are so in the mean time you might as well find joy in your life wherever/whenever you can. There are highs and lows in every person's life. There were two big issues I had with this book which led me to my low rating. The first being all the scripture/Bible quotes. I totally get the fact that the author is a devout Christian and she was drawing on her own life experiences and the fact that her faith in God helped her get past the pain of some pretty devastating experiences. I am not judging her based on her religious beliefs, I just don't want to hear Bible quotes every other paragraph or so. The second issue I had with this book was the author's view on homosexuality. It turns out that one of the devastating experiences in her life is that she discovers her one son Larry is gay (one other son is killed in Vietnam and one is killed in an accident by a drunk driver). A good portion of the book is devoted to how she handles this fact. She starts a ministry to help other mothers get through crisis with their children such as homosexuality, alcoholism, drug addiction. I really found her viewpoints to be very old school and sorry, downright prudish. I had to keep telling myself that this book was published 27 years ago when the gay community was looked at differently than today and the author was a grown woman with adult children. The era in which the author grew up in was a time when homosexuality was not socially acceptable and when you throw in her being a devout Christian it certainly explains her viewpoints. There was one particular paragraph in the last chapter that really rubbed me the wrong way. Here are the two sentences in that paragraph that I totally had issues with. "Support and love your child in every legitimate way you can, but do not support the sin that has him in it's grasp. You want your child to know that home is a loving, warm, comfortable place, but it is not an incubator for immature behaviour." First off, I do realize in her Christian faith that being gay is a sin but there are worse sins her son could have committed other than being gay. At least he wasn't out murdering innocent people. The second part I had the issue with is the immature behaviour part. A thirteen year old throwing a temper tantrum in a store because you didn't buy him a toy is immature behaviour. A grown adult coming out of the closet (whether you are male or female) and admitting you are gay is NOT, in my opinion, immature behaviour. Again I had to remind myself of the age of the author and her upbringing, her religious beliefs and the time frame of when these events took place. I would like to think that we, as a society, have come a long way in our views of gay people and I am sure that we have a long way to go still. So if you think you can read this book without getting tired/bored/irritated with all the bible quotes or if you think you can read it without getting annoyed and wanting to throw the book across the room then by all means read this book. If you don't think you can do either of these things then stay away from this book. Far, far away.

[Karen F. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Barbara had a lot of tragedy in her life. The death of two sons and another gay. She devoted most of the book to Spatula, a ministry for hurting parents. It must have been a shock to her in the early 80's for her son to come out of the closet. And then the decade of AIDS happened, was this the reason her son left that life? I think this book is dated. I did like a few of her quotes. "God made wrinkles to show where smiles have been." Her Joy Room was interesting and presents a good question, What brings you Joy? But on the whole, it was just an okay book. We read it for our Christian book club selection. Others didn't like it at all and had difficulty finishing it.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book for women who are overcoming tragedy. Barbara has a depth of understand that comforts one with humor and lots of funny insights to serious problems.

[Yrag Notsew · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really good book. Light. Easy to read. Real. Personal. Full of the author's own testimonies and anecdotes. Every chapter liberally peppered with quotes from all over. This book is almost an anthology.
Heartbreak not told in a soppy, mawkish way but in a mature, realistic, first hand experience reporting - type of way. Excellent balance of hard headed reality, heart felt pain and zany humor.
I think it's the kind of book you can go back to and read and reread again and again and continue to gain from.
Although told by a woman who is a women's speaker, men can benefit.
Perhaps in a playful way, I wasn't sure if all of her jibes at her husband were all really that helpful. Or am I just being over-sensitive? Defensive?
My advice: Read this book. You'll be glad you did.

[Gabriela · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is exactly what it is presented as...a book for Christian mothers. I appreciated the author's candor and her sharing her story in such an authentic manner. When reading this book I had to practice extreme levels of empathy and objectiveness, seen as I do not agree with a large part of her opinions. Nevertheless, I would still recommend this book to people straying from their faith or believers going through a hard moment. I was able to draw lessons from it that apply to my own life, but rate it 3 stars simply due to personal preferences about writing styles and subject manner.

[Ami Loper · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book I've been soaking in this month is another one of those that has been around forever, but it is coming into my life at just the right time. It is the bestseller, "Stick a Geranium in Your Hat and Be Happy" by Barbara Johnson.
Written all the way back in 1990, it has found me where I am today and encouraged joy--not based on fluff or just thinking your way there by denying your reality, but how to actually walk through grief (a grief that has been the hallmark of my life for the last two years) and come through better instead of bitter.

[Cheryl Licata · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Pain is inevitable but misery is optional." These words grace the cover of this book which offers laughs and hope to all who are dealing with difficulties. The author's thoughts on aging resonated within me. Two of my favorites are "Inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened" and "everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt doesn't work." Barbara Johnson suffered through many tragedies and still, in this book, she kept her sense of humor and desire to help other people.

[Hana Fadness · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5-4 stars. At first, the part where her son revealed he was homosexual threw me off--her response made me really sad and upset, to the point where I almost stopped reading this book. It was nice to see her "grow up" in that situation and accept her son in the end. She is really comical in her storytelling. I think I will pick up a couple more of her books. I skipped over the religious bits, but overall it was an entertaining, raw read.

[Heidi Morrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having been given several books in the series by my Mother in Love, (whose residence is Heaven), I read this book several years ago. Recommended for older readers, as very real subjects are discussed. I personally came away with questions that I am still learning to choose Joy, no matter the circumstance. Easier said than done. I'm so thankful that the Lord never changes, and His Word remains as our Guide through every joy and trial in our lives.

[Johanne · Rating 1 out of 5]

Good ideas from this writer, and I enjoyed reading about her life with her dear and loving husband. The stories are hilarious yet loving. I was not comfortable with her views on homosexuality. At one point she writes how after finding out that her son was gay nearly caused her to end her life. A little too dramatic for my liking. I did not finish the book.

[Lynnette · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found the author's reaction to one of her family tragedies to be hard to comprehend. I had to keep reminding myself of when it happened, which made it somewhat more understandable, but still . . .
Other than that, there are some gems of wisdom hidden in the midst of the hysteria, making the book a decent read.

[Dee Dee · Rating 4 out of 5]

Honestly, I had known about this book for a long time but likely would never have read it had it not been for a friend recommending it when I was going through a very difficult time. It was just what I needed! The honesty of her story and the truths she applied helped me shift my perspective on my own circumstances.

[Marie Smith · Rating 1 out of 5]

Didn't actually finish it. Been going through some tough time and thought this book, as old as it is, might share some insights to getting through those difficulties. Yes, there were some good insights and how to view life situations but it was a tad too religious for me. Let alone hiding behind religion to justify views and actions against those of the gay community.

[Nan · Rating 1 out of 5]

My mom was reading this and the cover interested me but I recall it being fake positive or these days probably toxic positivity and not helpful for what I now know was abuse/toxic behaviors going on in my childhood.

[Kbarker · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found points in this book I could relate to. It was an OK book. She has helped a lot of people with the writing of the book and by being a motivational speaker.

[Jenny · Rating 3 out of 5]

This author has been recommended to me a couple of times. Overall she had some good info but it just wasn't my style.

[Linda Aldridge · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this book many years ago and enjoyed just as much if not more this second time round.

[Lisa Post · Rating 4 out of 5]

Uplifting and humorous! Quick read.

[Carol · Rating 4 out of 5]

a good book on how to deal with life's difficulties.

[Amy Martens · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book!

Well worth the read! What an amazing woman with an amazing story! She really demonstrates the joy of the Lord.