Winning Body Language: Control the Conversation, Command Attention, and Convey the Right Message without Saying a Word

by Mark Bowden

CONTROL THE CONVERSATION, COMMAND ATTENTION, AND CONVEY THE RIGHT MESSAGE--WITHOUT SAYING A WORD Whether you're presenting an idea, delivering a speech, managing a team, or negotiating a deal, your body language plays a key role in your overall success. This ingenious step-by-step guide, written by an elite trainer of Fortune 50 CEOs and G8 world leaders, unlocks the secrets of nonverbal communication--using a proven system of universal techniques that can give you the ultimate professional advantage. Learn easily how to:

Genres: Psychology, Business, Nonfiction, Self Help, Communication, Personal Development, Leadership

256 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2010

About the author

Mark Bowden is a world renowned author, trainer and keynote speaker on human communication, body language and behaviour in business. He is the creator of TRUTHPLANE™, a communication training company and unique methodology for anyone who has to communicate to an audience with impact. His communication techniques, in which he trains individuals and groups worldwide, are used by top executives and political leaders around the globe who want to gain an advantage beyond words when they speak. Over his 20 years of experience, he has garnered a reputation for being one of the world's experts in presentation skills training, and he is a highly sought after for his business presentation skills at such universities as international top 10 business school Schulich at York University, Rotman School of Business in Toronto and McGill in Montreal. His client list of leading businesspeople, teams, and politicians currently includes presidents and CEOs of Fortune 500 companies and current Prime Ministers of G8 powers. He is an expert in body language, often appearing in the media to comment on how politicians, business leaders and celebrities present themselves to influence and persuade us.

Reviews

[Danielle Libine-collins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mark Bowden’s Winning Body Language holds fascinating insight on how powerful a tool our bodies are when it comes to communication and controlling a conversation. If you have any doubt, I invite you to watch his brilliant TED talk where he gives a very strong live demonstration of the elements discussed in this book.

I own many books on Body Language, and wasn’t expecting to learn a lot more from this one. I was wrong. After highlighting most of the first few pages, I finally put the highlighter down because there was something new and interesting on almost every page.

This is a must have book if you are interested in understanding how to use Body Language to get your message across!

[Karen Cavalli · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book offers excellent guidance on using one's own body language to change opinions of others and stay open to changing your own opinions. The teachings here are a great complement to learning how to detect what others' body language is telling you.

Bowden's recommendations can be experienced immediately and viscerally. For example, he suggests saying "I love you" while placing your hands at each of the three different planes of the body which he terms grotesque, truth, and passion and noting how the feeling changes at each plane. I tried this, and found it really does! He also presents the valuable YesStates and NoStates and how to quickly get into either, depending upon your purpose. I put the YesState into practice and can attest to the immediate emotional and attitudinal shift.

Especially valuable is the section starting on page 96 about how all the body and all its various systems and functions are involved on what appears on the face. This reinforces how complex it is to read a person's expression.

I first learned about Bowden's expertise on body language through watching him on YouTube's The Behavior Panel (of which I'm a huge fan). Bowden's advice and know-how are critical for anyone, whether you are interviewing for a job, suggesting a purchase to your spouse or life partner, or presenting or selling. He is smart, funny, jovial, cajoling, "big," a term he uses in this book. His expression is big--big in gesture, expression, and his frequent emphasis of certain words and phrases, using his voice so that they linger and make it clear we should notice them. I'm not a fan of big unless I'm star gazing or watching fireworks. His voice, however, is one among four, and his style is a complement to the others' varying modes of expression.

I'm giving the book a 4 instead of a 5 because I felt it could have had a better editing. Italics are overused as a stand-in for the way the spoken voice can emphasize. There are some sentences that, to me, are weirdly constructed. For example, on page 117: "My new models have evolved from older ones by masters of applied psychology of movement such as Rudolph Laban and his protege, the great acting trainer to amongst others Sean Connery, Pierce Brosnan, and Anthony Hopkins; Yat Malmgrem." I had to stop and puzzle until I realized the sentence structure places Yat Malmgren's name far away from what it modifies, the word protege. This may be a sentence structure Bowden is fond of; he uses it in his intro tagline on The Behavior Panel, placing "including leaders of the G7" far away from what it modifies. For me this causes a head-scratching moment but maybe not for everyone else. Bowden sometimes but not always cites sources, such as when he notes history Roman crucifixions placed the arms in a Y instead of a stretched-out letter I, as opposed to the more common cross. The book also uses some outdated material, for example, Dr. Albert Mehrabian's theory about how little content really matters in communication, but then again, the book was published in 2010. The publication date may also account for the inclusion of a kind of handshake Bowden advocates where you gently turn the other person's hand over and gently pull it toward your mid-section. Hm...I would not like anyone doing that to me. There are also a number of other punctuation errors and typos.

My recommendation: just stay focused on this book's wealth of knowledge, training, and tips about not just communicating but connecting and enjoy the theatre along the way. Oh, and also I suggest staying open to changing your own opinions! I am on that path now and hope I achieve what Bowden suggests is possible.

[Mohammadreza Zeinodini · Rating 3 out of 5]

چند سال پیش برای اولین بار سر کاری درست و حسابی رفتم. یک شرکت ایده پرداز درباره راه های فروش محصولات مختلف
قبلا سر کار رفته بودم اما کار هایی که از روی اجبار و از سر بی پولی انجامشان داده بودم. تراکت پخش کردن، کارگاه توپ سازی و کار نزدیک کوره، مسئول پست، حل کردن سوال های امتحان ریاضی برای بچه های خنگول (خدا خنگ ها رو حفظ کنه)
اما در شرکت ایده پرداز مجبور بودم با آدم ها مواجه بشم. چیزی که همه عمرم ازش ترسیدم. رئیسِ بخش اولین بار که من رو دید گفت پسر چرا اینقدر خجالتی هستی. صاف وایسا آهان. بلند صحبت کن!!!
بیا بگیر این کتاب رو بخون
"زبان بدن در کسب و کار اثر مارک بودن"
کتاب رو خوندم. اولا آقای مارک بودن نفست از جای گرم بلند می‌شه. تو با اون قیافه هالیوودی و مو های بِلوند بلندت معلومه که بدون یک کلمه مخاطب رو جذب می‌کنی
(•-•)
یکی از تمرین های داخل کتاب این بود: به یک قصابی بروید و سفارش یک پیتزا دهید
منم همین کار رو کردم ولی قصاب با گوشه چشمش نگاهی به من کرد و گفت : اُسکلی ؟
منم اصرار کردم که پِپِرونی می‌خوام. قصاب بد دهن گفت "...کِش شوخی دارم با تو؟" و جوری ساطور به دست از پیشخوان بیرون اومد (به سبک فیلم شاینینگ ) که من شک نداشتم الآنه که با ساطورش شقه شقه ام کنه
خلاصه اینکه تمرین های این کتاب به درد جامعه ایران نمی‌خوره پس به قول معروف در خانه این ها رو تکرار نکنید. مگر اینکه سرعت دویدن خوبی داشته باشید و بتونید از دست قصاب فرار کنید.مثل من
:)
اما جمله ایی درون این کتاب بود که در دلم رسوخ کرده و باعث شد امروز یاد این کتاب بیفتم
نویسنده می‌گفت برای برطرف کردن اضطراب های اجتماعی باید خودمون رو در موقعیت های کنترل شده قرار بدیم و ریسک کنیم
خیلی درسته. منم می‌خوام خیلی بیشتر از قبل ریسک کنم تا بتونم با ترس هام مواجه بشم
یک بار خوندنش رو پیشنهاد می‌کنم چون واقعا سودمند هست

[Paul Ince · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was gifted this book by the author as a random audience member in a keynote he was delivering. I enjoyed it more than I thought. Some great insights into human behaviour. It made me think about how I can use body language to my advantage without being manipulative.

[Emley Kerry · Rating 2 out of 5]

There were a few things that were useful for my Moth presentation, but it sometimes reads like a pickup artists handbook to body language. Feels reductive, simplistic, and inadvertently bleakly portrays human nature as opportunitstic and selfish.

[Alb Imeri · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the best body language books I've ever read.

[Louise Roberts · Rating 4 out of 5]

A highly entertaining read with benefits.

[Andrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Libro sul controllo del linguaggio del corpo oer comunicare meglio 8

[Nicky Kobly · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoy Bowden's voice and I think this is a very fun and yet useful book.

[Keith Brooks · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good read, not great on the examples or what the actions really look like or need to be. Probably could be summed up in 1 chapter.

[Nuradin · Rating 3 out of 5]

it was great

[Nick · Rating 5 out of 5]

In my first review of Mark's book, I pasted it pretty hard, because I don't agree with some of his conclusions. My system for understanding body language is based on science; Mark's is based on mime, some acting traditions and gurus like Jacques LeCoq, and even Moshe Feldenkrais. On reflection, though, I've revised my opinion, because the point is that he has worked out a system, and even if I don't agree with it, he deserves high marks for that. Science is, after all, always provisional and subject to change -- and in this case the brain science is evolving so fast that we can expect changes on almost a monthly basis. Hence, I decided that a more charitable view was in order. The real enemy (in body language circles) here is the old approach to body language based on trying to decode individual gestures. See my blog on the subject posting today at www.publicwords.com.

[David Bradley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I go back to the lessons Bowden discusses constantly. As I get into speaking professionally more, the lessons become ever more important.

It's an interesting read, also. It isn't just, "people like when you put your hands here". Bowden knows how we are wired, so there's science backing all that he teaches. Before you get started on this, go check out his TED Talk. The guy is entertaining, but extremely educational as well.

Whether you're just interested to help you in presentations at work (or school), or it's a cornerstone to your career, this is a must-read!

[Semiophrenic · Rating 5 out of 5]

This may be the best book on body language out there, if only because instead of making wild suggestions about reading others, this one instructs the reader to improve his or her self-presentation. Although it is targeted at business people and sometimes delves into appropriate language (e.g. "declining equity markets"), I believe this book to be beneficial to any public speaker. All in all it merely teaches the reader to breathe and gesture at certain heights.

[Philski · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was very interesting. I don't give many presentations anymore but the information was useful on how different postures convey different feelings and how the incongruence between posture and message with confuse the audience and lead them to believe posture over the words! What was really nice is the diagram in the appendix which sums up all the posture planes in one easy chart.

[Jonathan O'neal · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book has some great points, but I took it mostly as being geared towards presentations rather than communicating with my team. Because I am aware of some of the issues that hand placement can have I can be more aware of how I present myself. I'm looking forward to seeing what affect this has on the people areound me.

[Sam Hager · Rating 4 out of 5]

Highly recommended for professionals who need to connect with their audience. Topics includes how to be congruent in your body language, how to connect and convey trust, how certain body positions creat extreme psychological effects in an audience. I already put the items in the book to practice and have seen that they work.

[Ietrio · Rating 1 out of 5]

I have loved the concept of the conversation without saying a word. Than I got puzzled: here are quite a lot of words for someone who does not have to say a word. Getting over sarcasm, this is the book of a loser trying to put his hand into the pocket of other insecure persons. Command attention? Do something spectacular. Become a somebody.

[John Scott · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is just a primer to the must read or have:
Stalter, Harmony - 9781601381477
Employee body language revealed :
how to predict behavior in the
workplace by reading and
understanding body language.

[Peggy Dekay · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mark Bowden is an irreverent Brit, but knows his stuff when it comes to body language. If you are a speaker or want to become one, you need to read this book. I have read dozens of "body language" books and Bowden's information is superior, original and useful. High praise for a "how-to" book.

[Eric Molicki · Rating 3 out of 5]

Helpful and practical but far from revolutionary. Novices to experienced communicators can still find helpful insights in this work.

[Asma · Rating 3 out of 5]

نصف نجاح الأمور تبدأ من التواصل الصحيح مع العميل أو الجمهور أو حتى الطلاب المتعلمين وفهم ما قد يؤثر على هذا التواصل و معرفة أهم أخطاء لغة الجسد وكيفية تفاديها .
يستحق قراءة ثانية متأنيه بالطبع

[Eswar · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great tips, but quite redundant and verbose.

[James · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ok a few good ideas. However a bit superfluous. I'd say it's a waste of time

[Cody James Cummings · Rating 5 out of 5]

Most important book I have read this far in nonverbal communication and public speaking. Absolutely essential to professional communicators.

[Cyrus · Rating 3 out of 5]

Definitely could be a 30 page pdf. Very fluffy. I think it is valuable information and looking forward to trying it out.

[Daron Yondem · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is so much information packed into this book. A definite read! Loved it.

[Karen Wright · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolute required reading for all my executive clients.

[Sumit · Rating 1 out of 5]

Waste of time!