Life Skills For A Broken World

by Ahona Guha

A revolutionary framework for living well in a broken world, from acclaimed author and psychologist Dr Ahona Guha.

How can I manage heartbreak? How do I cope with death? How can I learn to tolerate anxiety and hold hope?

In this helpful, practical guide to good psychological health, Dr Ahona Guha shows us how to cope, thrive, and still feel hopeful for the future. Combining techniques from a range of therapeutic modalities, she demonstrates how we can build a range of essential psychological skills, and apply them to live a more tranquil and joyful life.

Life Skills for a Broken World is a breath of fresh air, cutting through the confusion to provide solid, practical, and evidence-based answers to existential questions, big and small.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology, Audiobook, Mental Health

208 pages, Hardcover

First published January 9, 2024

About the author

Ahona Guha is the author of Reclaim: understanding complex trauma and those who abuse (2023) and Life Skills for a Broken World (2024), both published by Scribe. She writes widely on matters related to mental health, health, social justice and equity. Her work has appeared in The Age, The Guardian, The Saturday Paper and Breathe Magazine, among many others. She can be found at www.ahonaguha.com.

Reviews

[Suz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dr Guha is a breath of fresh air when we need it the most. I found myself explaining to my son how people are a little lost in the world, especially if their family haven’t shown love from generation to generation, or some might mimic their parents at times bad behaviour, or sometimes there may be trauma. I tried not to delve too deeply as he is only 12, but wanted to use my experience with the book when helping him tell his soccer coach about his teammate who is autistic, the vulnerable one being bullied by the physical boy who swears at all the boys. I had to decide to quickly mention this to the coach and step back while my son explained the verbal and physical abuse. He wasn't afraid to and I was proud of him. I digress.

My heavy NF reads always can help me in some way or another, this one sure did. Ahona Guha is a wise source of information, I feel safe in her hands, conveying her ideals easily for every type of reader.

The author presents easy to understand information in explaining emotions v. reality, all the different ways in which we humans catastrophise, fortune tell, glorify, the things that help, and the things that don’t. She talks about many things of interest to me, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, Radical Acceptance, self soothing, and managing emotions. These are all larger issues in themselves, but here we have a glimpse and summary for interested readers to look into further if their interest is piqued.

We need parts of our lives to be full to feel joy, hobbies, interests, a desire to want to do things. She talks about depression, anxiety and all the common pitfalls the world is experiencing in relation to materialistic desires (how is all your stuff going to help) the desire to look shiny and amazing on your Instagram feed. She talks about issues that are glorified and thrown around in the media, pop culture and social media and helps demystify what is important. Ideas are talked about, I feel if a reader is feeling down when reading this book they will be able to hold on to something she chats about, and this of course is a great thing.

We can easily see her principles bought to life as she tells us what she chooses to do in her own situation. Ensuring work calls are kept in boundaries of work hours unless prearranged, set breaks through out the year, and the choice to rescue a dog rather than choose a glam puppy from an industry that pump them out for money and nothing else. She loves her dog and tells us while her choices are not going to make a massive difference, her choice to life her life this way help her and make for a whole life. Being ok with her body, imploring others to be the same. I loved the thoughts around a woman’s body designed to move, stretch, expand, birth. What is really important, she wonders, and I had to smile when she reflects on seeing typos in her book in years to come.

The author's career in forensic psychology provides an experienced framework from which all this information is well balanced, as she is so experienced with the polar extremes in society; she is not afraid to voice her opinions which may be different to many.

I may have absorbed my reading of this book in a more focused way had I read this a week later after a horrific and violent public event in Australia, but other readers will be able to access this as valuable resource at an excellent time. This book is available in audio format through Australian libraries, and I urge curious readers, or anyone needing a little help to read this. Dr Guha is personable and speaks from the heart. I think she’s a remarkably smart woman with many excellent things to say. This book is perfect to have on your shelf to refer back to long after reading to help in harder times.

Thank you to Marina and @scribepub for my copy to read and review. This book and Reclaim take pride of place on my shelf.

[Nat K · Rating 5 out of 5]

Is the world broken? In many respects, the answer could be a resounding “yes”. With turmoil in hotspots across continents, less rest and downtime from a dependence (or addiction) to technology and increasing loneliness despite the hyper connectedness of individuals, the world can be a difficult place. Add erratic weather patterns, the busy-ness of life, and our seeming inability to be able to converse with each, let alone have a lively debate with different views on the same topic, it seems to be a lost cause.

But it’s not! And doesn’t have to be. Yes, bad things happen, and often for no reason. The anger and angst is real. Grief is unavoidable. Illness takes hold. Friendships end. Work can lead to burnout. But there are ways we can learn to cope better, simple skills that we can incorporate into our lives that may just help make the world a more forgiving and calmer place. It all starts with us.

The topics are broken into chunks such as Radical Acceptance and Boundaries And Limits with empathetic yet straightforward thoughts on how to change what isn’t working for us. About accepting our physical and emotional flaws. About embracing the positives we have, and being grateful for them. About trying to find joy in the everyday, Vitamin J (oy)!, the smell of coffee in the morning, a leaf unfurling, rainbows. Instead of focusing continually on the negatives of what ails us and upsets us in the world. And that yes, you are allowed to change your mind, and your opinion. To evolve. As the saying goes ”Be the change you want to see in the world which is so true. It all starts with you.

And I love how "hope" is mentioned, as without hope there really is nothing. Be a realist, start each day anew, but hope is the glue that holds things together. Which is kind of uncanny, as I've seen hope mentioned so many times across so many forums and media lately, so there really is something to it.

"Hope is closely connected to the dreams we have, and our values. We all want certain things, both simple - good friends and a job that gives us paid sick leave - or complicated - finding a way to bring more peace to the world. Hope is beautiful and multi-textured, and if we know how to use it well, it drives most change."

The illustrations throughout the book, of greyhounds (a la Dr.Guha’s bestest girl Karla) and of figures contemplating life and the Universe, this is a beaut book. I really enjoyed reading it, and it’s one I’ll happily delve into again. In fact, there are a few chapters that I’ve already read a few times.

Like her earlier book Reclaim https://www.goodreads.com/review/show... this one is also written in a conversational, easy to understand style. Like chatting with a friend over coffee or a mate at the pub. When you’re discussing the big issues putting the world to rights.

Thoroughly enjoyed!

And I absolutely love this line:

"We were once primordial soup and stardust - now we type on laptops and debate the meaning of life. Pretty cool."

Yes it is.

[Carly Dober · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another brilliant offering from a knowledgeable and compassionate human, in which most people could easily use the tools and concepts provided to sit with their lives differently.

[Ali · Rating 5 out of 5]

"You will never feel truly okay in a world beset by inequality, nastiness, and poor distribution of resources. The world is connected in many ways, and things that might feel distant currently (such as climate change, geopolitical conflict, or economic policy) will inevitably come to affect your life. Filling your own cup first is important, but a mentally healthy and meaningful life inevitably requires social connections and contribution to the wellbeing of other people. Exclusively tending to your own thoughts, feelings, and wants won’t create the broader social conditions all humans need to have a good life. Equally, ignoring your own needs and only giving to other people will also leave you unhappy and stressed."

I would strongly recommend this to, well, probably everyone, but definitely those who find themselves motivated around wanting a better world, but who could still use a bit of advice about living in this one. Gua structures short chapters which outline core psychology concepts, with an explanation for how they can be useful, usually some examples of how she herself uses them, some suggested actions and one or two recommendations for future reading. The concision, short chapters and checklists would make this accessible even for the overwhelmed.
The concepts here are thankfully not sold as some recently discovered miracle. Gua draws from ACT and CBT, and core skills in a professional's toolkit. She explains where they come from and how a framework works, and gives you pathways to follow up. I especially loved how she integrated a core tenet of ACT - that aligning actions and values assists in finding meaning - into an understanding of a society in crisis. I also very much appreciated her desconstruction of how positivity can become counter-productive, and practical suggestions on being informed without hyperconnected or trusting misinformation. She tackles how to deal with common issues, such as a fear of being disliked, grief and setting expectations. Other sections deal with concepts such as acceptance, boundaries, emotions (What are emotions? is a chapter), finding joy, experiencing awe and soothing yourself. She tackles some of the worst aspects of consumer culture and includes tips for reducing reliance on the treadmill.
"Think about the impact consumerism, capitalism, and the pressure to live, look, and behave a certain way have on your mental wellbeing. At best, it might exert a slight tug and sway you away from your values. At worst, you might be completely burnt out and exhausted by trying to maintain your lifestyle, trapped on a hedonic and consumerist treadmill as a way of soothing yourself, further perpetuating your need to keep working so hard."
In all sections, she balances individual needs with remaining socially responsible and connected. She advocates strongly that being mentally well relies ultimately on being connected, and on having a functioning society around us. This is not a recipe for being happy all the time, but something is promising here in living a meaningful life that feels emotionally sustainable.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

A really engrossing and valuable book - Life Skills for a Broken World breaks down concepts that you might come across in therapy in an easy-to-understand and engaging way that anyone can apply to their everyday lives. It's the kind of book that will speak to everyone on one level or another and is full of actionable advice without pretending that there's a miracle answer to every problem in today's society. A really worthwhile read.

[ZB bumbebee · Rating 3 out of 5]

Self help books are so funny 🖤🙈

[Frankie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Perfect self help book for a bloodyminded enneagram 4

[Snigdha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved the book! So many useful skills written in a very easy to understand format. The Greyhound illustrations are adorable and add a fun element to this book.

I highly recommend journalling using the prompts in the book, they're thought provoking and are leaving me with a lot more self-awareness (and things to discuss in therapy!)

[Kaye Lundy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has pretty standard advice as far as self-help books go, but it rides the line between too professional and too personal pretty well, which is normally a major flaw that these books have. I like that the author is a psychologist with many years of experience under her belt, but additionally, she has also gone through personal destabilization of her own. Many of the self-help/personal skills books that I've read come from either a too personal or a too detached academic standpoint, both of which really rankle.

Overall, the advice is good and clearly organized in the book. My biggest criticism is that I think the book was too brief. It goes over a lot of important but varied topics, only touching on each one for several pages. If this was intended to be used as a book to check back in on, I think that it could have had more material.

Other than that, it was a good book with good advice. Nothing out of the ordinary for a book like this.

[Jarred · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was ok. I expected a lot more from this book in terms of depth and practicality, though what was delivered in the end was just wishy washy, run of the mill psychology.

[Janelle]

Dnf. Mostly good, but not quite what I needed. I have some other resources that will probably be more helpful for me.

[Courtney Newman · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alot of information and useful tips. Just found it read more textbook and was really hard to get through.

[astrid bee]

will be a great book to use for future clients, breaks things down so well

[Kunal Thakkar · Rating 3 out of 5]

A week before I received this book from the publisher in February I was reading Olga Tokarczuk's DRIVE YOUR PLOW. Page 112 — I remember taking a note of the entire page. It talks about how the world is full of suffering and in order to survive we need to inflict pain on others. It just furthered my notion of us living in a broken world.

Cut to the last week when I picked this to actually read it (A+ for the title, btw). Dr Ahona Guha acknowledges that we live in a broken world, but she's not entirely cynical about it (unlike me🤪) because she thinks that we're actually freer than ever, especially to name & talk about and challenge this darkness that grips our society. This decade is all about the aesthetics so more points for the cute illustrations inside & the entire format of the book. The author makes us alert in the start that the book doesn't need to be necessarily read from the start to finish, which is again good.

Things I found unique here for a book on mental health were its stating about different political & social environments affecting us differently, about how the emotion of empathy should be protected with us, about the world being grey. It comes with a range of book recommendations which was the best part, other NF books that talk about mental health. And obviously..a few frameworks on dealing your mental health in a better way, which the cynical me is going to absolutely ignore 😃😂 jk.

[Lisa Anybookanytime · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a well thought out framework for mental health and general coping skills that is presented in useful, bite-sized pieces. As a reader, you can look up specific concerns (like setting boundaries), or read it as an overall primer on managing the stresses of modern life.

The author brings both her professional expertise and her personal experiences to this guide, which makes it both literate and professional as well as warm and relatable. 

As a result, I found the tone and content very accessible, balanced between psychological theory and personal examples (and humour). 

I also appreciated the inclusion of further readings for each subject, ranging from Women Don't Owe You Pretty by Florence Given to Bad Science by Ben Goldacre.

Being someone who gets very weary of black and white arguments on social media, my favourite section was about embracing differences and dualities.

How can you argue with an author who recognises the positive benefits of cake? And whose book dedication and acknowledgements name her gorgeous rescue greyhound, Karla.

Soft ears and beautiful smelling puppy feet make me happy too!

This book does not replace professional care. If this post has raised any issues for you, I encourage you to contact your GP or a support network in your region. 

NOTE this book was gifted. This is my honest review.

[Brooke Alice (brookes.bookstagram) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book gives us the tools and strategies to cope with the current state of the world. Think of it as a handy guide, step by step on where you’re at and what you can do to ground yourself.

This book allows us to safely navigate our feelings, challenge our reality and soothe ourselves in times of uncertainty. Whether that be from past traumas, relationships ending, or simply the overwhelm of current affairs.

The book is broken down into manageable chapters, including strategies to assist. Simple things like managing and recognising burnout, managing relationships, setting boundaries healthily and advocating for yourself.

Each little tip allows us to take back some control in a world that feels out of control and allows us to breathe a little bit more deeply and feel a little bit more calm in the chaos.

Will constantly pick this up and refer back to it!

[Morgan Fisher · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a lovely, easy read that serves as a quick crash course for many topics often covered in therapy. I think it's a great intro to therapy for those not ready to dip their toes in, and/or a good refresher for those who need to keep learned skills from therapy sharp and at the forefront of their minds (like myself).

Dr. Guha's voice is fun and comforting around hard topics, and I enjoyed her personal commentary throughout, along with little morsels of her own experiences. I particularly enjoyed the chapters on boundaries, self care and burnout and adored the greyhound doodles.

[Melanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book at a particularly difficult time in my life where I am facing great change and uncertainty. It gave me hope with its clear framework for growth and acceptance, and also reassured me that I have the skills to handle the difficult emotions I am currently feeling. I find Dr Ahona Guha’s insight and guidance clear and articulate, and above all else this book brought me a sense of comfort. Knowing that what I am currently feeling is both normal and universal helps to put things into perspective, and makes me feel less alone.

[Otis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant. A lot of what is said in this book isn't really anything new, it is just very well written...until the final chapter on understanding discourse, activism, behaviour online, dealing with disagreements, and social media.

I usually potter around the house doing chores whilst I listen to books, but this part actually had me standing in the living room completely absorbed in the message. Brilliant writing on a topic that more people would do well to understand and engage with.

[lauren♡ · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 / 5 stars

I'll preface this by saying I can easily see someone giving this 5 stars. The only caveat for me, however, is that I am very much someone with a tendency to self reflect and intellectualise my own thoughts and feelings etc. so a lot of stuff in this I already do or wasn't very applicable to me. The rest of the book was excellent, I'm just giving it 3.5 because I personally didn't get that much out of it, but it was still good nonetheless!

[Abbey Cerone · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5⭐️
I have never annotated an ebook as much as I did with this one. Pretty sure Lauren (hey Lauren) recommended this to me as a bit of a piss take for loving all things self improvement but it was really good!! None of Dr Guha’s recommendations were things I’d never heard/thought of before but she brought them together in a great way. Would definitely recommend.

[Amie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book has so much practical advice. It also uncovers the myths about what mental health is and isn’t. While reading, I marked this book up and tabbed so many pages that you’d think I had a final exam on it.

[Emily Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic self help book with effective evidence based skills and easy steps to create great change in your life. Some of the ideas, questions and strategies really resonated with me. Amazing author with a lot of knowledge to share.

[Neva · Rating 3 out of 5]

Primeros auxilios psicológicos
"Many of us feel socially disconnected but virtually hyper-connected; we’re stressed, burnt out, anxious, sad, and hopeless"
Tenemos que ser más amables, en especial con nosotros mismos. Esa es la relación que tenemos de por vida.

[H Alexander · Rating 5 out of 5]

A much more condensed book from Guha. A very practical and effective self help book that gets to the point and is well rounded.

[Saige B · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book that really reiterated a lot of important lessons for me!!

[Kit Yung Tan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Useful, highly actionable read!

[Jia Chen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Australian author - quite relatable, great tips, but can easily forget the points so need to get back to the chapter from time to time to practise the skills

[Katarina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good reminders about how to look after your mental health.

[Vui Lên · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75