Expanding the Borders of Zion: A Latter-day Saint Perspective on LGBTQ Inclusion

by Charlie Bird

Many people want to offer love and support to their LGBTQ friends and neighbors but aren't sure how. Charlie Bird’s unique position as a gay Latter-day Saint has given him valuable insight. In this book, he authentically details the blessings and challenges faced by gay members of the Church and provides readers with the perspective, understanding, and tools they need to more effectively minister to those who identity as LGBTQ.

Expanding the Borders of Zion bridges the gap between religion and the LGBTQ community in a way that is both bold and inviting. It will undoubtedly inspire you to love deeper, grow closer to Christ, and expand your heart to more fully embrace all of God’s children.

Genres: Religion, Lds, Nonfiction, Church, LGBT, Book Club, Memoir

225 pages, Paperback

Published December 9, 2022

About the author

Charlie Bird is an award-winning author, podcaster, therapist, and social media influencer based in Utah. He is known for playing the role of Cosmo the Cougar at Brigham Young University from 2016-2018, where he received national acclaim for his dance performances and viral mascot videos. Bird was born and raised in Southwest Missouri, and served a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Redlands, California. He holds two undergraduate degrees from BYU, as well as a Master’s in Social Work. Charlie is passionate about bridging the gap between LGBTQ+ and religion, evident by his frequent work nonprofit organizations and weekly involvement with the ‘Questions from the Closet’ podcast. When he isn’t writing, speaking, or advocating, Charlie can be found hiking the Wasatch mountains, traveling with friends, or tumbling at local gymnastics gyms. To stay up-to-date with all of Charlie’s advocacy and adventures, you can find him on social media as @mrcharliebird.

Reviews

[Emily Pope · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book should be required reading for every member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, especially those who desire to be a more loving, empathetic, compassionate and inclusive disciple of Christ. I learned so much about how to better love & treat my LGBTQ brothers and sisters. I also learned to look inside myself and to recognize where I need to make changes as an ally rather than expecting members of the LGBTQ to change. My heart grew 10x bigger and it swells with so much love for anyone who feels like they don’t belong in the church, or feels alone or alienated, or worries that there is no place for them here. After reading this beautiful book I can assure you, you are absolutely needed and YOU BELONG HERE.

[Megan Moss · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved Charlie Bird's first book, and I loved this one just as much if not more in some ways.

Charlie is a Gay member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and he shares his story about what it is like to walk in two communities that are unfortunately often considered opposing. It was really neat to read this after learning that Charlie proposed to his boyfriend of three years, and how he wants to strengthen his testimony and continue to worship in his faith—whatever that may look like.

I am in awe of Charlie's goal and desire to be a peace maker. His faith is such an example to me.

I have constantly asked myself how people make effective change, is it from the inside or outside of an organization? I think the answer is both. I personally love my faith, and really struggle with policies and ideas that are contrary to what I would want. This book gave me a lot of great ideas of how to walk this tough tightrope. I loved it and would recommend it to anyone.

The last chapter was especially breathtaking to me. I want to cheer Charlie on and anyone else who feels marginalized, especially those of the LGBTQ+ community. This book gave me hopes and ideas while also helping me better understand the many challenges. This book doesn’t present one neatly wrapped solution because there isn’t one, but it does suggest love and empathy as something that is always an answer.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to create space within a religious community for others who feel marginalized. Charlie is an engaging writer and opens up in deeply personal ways. I am so grateful for the good work he is doing in trying to teach members of a religious community how to love and support and create space for those in the LGBTQ community who want to also participate in their religion and stay close to God. This book helped me ask myself questions about how I am doing at putting aside my biases and opening my heart to invite ALL of God’s children to be close to Him. I learned some things and hope to share this book with others. Thx, Charlie, for the good work you are doing. I wish you every happiness!

[Joel Shoemaker · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am not Mormon. I don’t really even know much about the Church of Latter Day Saints. I bought this book because it came with a free letter from David Archuleta and I love David Archuleta.

What I am is profoundly grateful for Charlie Bird’s good work. I love the idea of Expanding the Borders of Zion to include members of the LGBTQIA+ community.

I am not a Mormon. But I am a gay member of a faith community who likewise believes that Jesus wants us and is making room for us.

This book is excellent. And I think it is for everyone. You can borrow my copy. You can’t borrow my letter from David Archuleta.

[Kimberly Harris Buma · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book! I encourage all members of my faith to read it. I’m so grateful for Charlie’s willingness to share his raw experiences with being LGBTQ in my church. I hope to be a better example of love and kindness to all going forward!

[Cambria · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was deeply captivated by Charlie’s life experiences.

I was in awe of the diversity highlighted in “Invite Them to Dinner”. I was also reminded of the importance of family dinner and carving out time to form deep connections with people we love and people we want to learn to love.
I was humbled during “Lord, Is It I?” as I was able to reflect on my past prejudices and biases, knowing that I have made improvements yet still have a lot to learn.
I felt a sense of need to remember my baptismal covenants and to be inclusive toward every person during “Covenant Allies”. When both Haley and Charlie felt too exhausted to bear their own burdens caused by other’s ignorance. We need to be stone catchers, not stone casters.

An overarching thought kept coming to my mind as I read this book. If we can but try to see each other as God sees us, we surely will be capable to love, include, accept, and invite ALL as God loves them.

Thank you to Charlie for sharing your testimony and experiences with us through this book. I have been changed for good. 💚🩷 🏳️‍🌈

[Beth Given · Rating 5 out of 5]

In his first book, Behind the Mask, Charlie Bird describes coming out as gay as a Latter-day Saint; while his viral video as BYU's mascot earned him fans, he wondered if those fans would still accept him if they knew his sexual orientation. In this follow-up book, Charlie shares more stories from his life and lessons he's learned from others. He challenges members of the Church to think expansively about our congregations, welcoming in LGBTQ+ members, and supporting them in every stage. He is vulnerable about his own continued challenges of belonging to two groups that many see as being opposed to one another.

It's been a few years since I read Behind the Mask, and since that book I've been following more LGBTQ/LDS social media accounts and podcasts (Richard Ostler's Listen Learn and Love, Lift and Love, Becky Edwards coaching, Latter-day Stonecatchers, and others). I figured this book would repeat many of the same themes I'm getting on those accounts and podcasts, and it does. But I also learned additional things from this book (for example, I hadn't heard of the Cass model of identity development, and found that to be a helpful framework in my understanding even outside of the LGBTQ experience). And I really appreciated the stories Charlie shared; some of the images (like walking into the chapel directly after marching on the pride parade) will stay with me.

Since publishing the book, he has married his partner Ryan, and with that he pulled his books from Deseret Book in an effort to avoid the inevitable controversy that would ensue. I admire how he handled the situation with grace, knowing that he'd take heat from both sides for his decision, but determined to live with integrity as best he could. I hope that through his words -- which every Latter-day Saint ally should read -- we can all become more loving to all those on the margins of our congregation.

[Annie · Rating 5 out of 5]

"We can no longer be complacent with a world where LGBTQ people feel like they have to reject the Church in order to accept themselves." <3

[Alex Hoeft · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautiful and raw and—random adjective but it feels right—sweet. This topic is certainly one that keeps me up at night, but damn if this book didn’t give me quite a bit of hope.

[Better Book Bureau · Rating 5 out of 5]

BRIEF REVIEW
I loved this book! There is SO MUCH good in here. It really helped me feel greater empathy toward our LGBTQ members. Charlie provides many personal stories, as well as plenty of scriptures and quotes from modern-day prophets and apostles to give further insight and support to his ideas. He is very respectful and supportive of God's doctrine but also doesn't sugarcoat the harder experiences he's had. There's humor, heartache, and enlightenment.

BRIEF CONTENT GUIDE
😘Mild, but be aware that there is a lot of discussion and stories of LGBTQ issues.
🙊No swearing.
🍷Mild
🤕Mild, but be aware that there are a few mentions of self harm, suicide, and suicidal feelings.

BOTTOM LINE
While this book may be insightful to any interested person, it is especially relevant if you are a member of @churchofjesuschrist and desire to improve your love and/or support toward LGBTQ members of our congregations; it is well worth a read.

FULL REVIEW AND CONTENT GUIDE available on blog at https://betterbookbureau.weebly.com/r...

#expandingthebordersofzion

[Nadia · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the big struggles I have with my church is that I don’t agree with the way my LGBTQ+ siblings are treated. I can’t understand why there’s no place for them. As a BIPOC/Latina/Peruvian I understand being discriminated for something you can’t change. And I truly believe the LGBTQ+ community are not wrong, are not facing a trial of faith, they belong. We all belong.

Charlie is a very powerful, yet approachable writer and I truly appreciated reading his words, his stories and his memories. Some chapters truly broke my heart, while others opened my eyes to ways I can show that I’m an ally, a safe space and I will expand the borders of my Zion for all of God’s children.

[Kaitlin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I didn't intend to read this immediately after A Walk in My Shoes, but my library queue had other plans. 🤣 Charlie is much more of a realist in this book than Ben was, and I appreciated his bluntness. It's not an easy road! The last chapter he talks about how right now, with the way the church currently stands, there is no way to fix these issues. All we can do is see LGBT people and meet them in their pain. 💔 Very powerful. Makes me want to be a better ally.

[Brianon Sheffield · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW, this was so so good! I haven't read his other book, but this one blew me out of the water. I think many members of my church could benefit by reading this- I want to recommend it to everyone. The audio was wonderful.

[Anita · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such an important book for anyone who is pursuing a more Christ-like, inclusive and compassionate outlook on the LGBTQ community and ALL of God's children! I really appreciated having the insight from Charlie Bird.

[Katlyne Jacobs · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book as much as his first!

[Kristy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've followed Charlie Bird on Instagram for a few years and have enjoyed his perspective on many things.

This book gave me a lot to think about and shifted my perspective a bit.

I'm glad I read it.

[Kristen Gardner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just another one of those books I really wish was required reading for every member of the church. *Especially* anyone in a leadership calling. Such good perspectives and insights, 10/10 recommend.

[Reece Welch · Rating 5 out of 5]

The nonfiction went much better this time around

[Natalie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book addresses a very important topic (loving and including our LGBTQ brothers and sisters) in such a beautiful, inspiring way. I actually found this book to be applicable beyond the LGBTQ lens to be wise counsel about loving any marginalized group of people better. I loved Charlie Bird’s memoir, “Without the Mask,” and honestly wasn’t sure how he would be able to follow up such a powerful story, but this book truly touched my heart deeply.

I particularly love how “Expanding the Borders of Zion” offers specific, actionable steps to better support LGBTQ people in many facets of their lives, but does so using scripture and the words and counsel of church leaders. This book is doctrinally sound and absolutely feels consistent with the approach of our Savior in His lifetime, and how we ought to act as His disciples. I had previously thought of myself as a pretty good ally to the LGBTQ community, but this book opened my eyes several times to change my assumptions and approach situations with greater humility.

It would be impossible for me to pick favorite chapters, but I did especially resonate with “Invite them to dinner,” “a place to belong,” “lord, is it I?” , and learned a lot from “support at every stage.” I would strongly encourage all Christians to read this book and know that if we took it to heart, our faith communities would transform for the better. I admire Charlie Bird so much for his faith, vulnerability, advocacy, and ability to find joy, strength and seek guidance in his life’s journey. He is a gift to us!

[kylie clark · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is *so* good. Charlie Bird boldly expresses devotion to his faith without shying away from sharing the hurt that some LDS church policies, leaders, and other members have caused him. He shares empathy-building and often faith-affirming stories of himself and others experiencing the LDS church through marginalized identities. His intersectional perspective shows the isolation of being told by so many people that two integral aspects of his identity can’t coexist— as he puts it: feeling “too gay for the Mormons and too Mormon for the gays.”

The author’s message is so approachable. He writes with an incredible amount of empathy for readers who may have only ever been exposed to anti-LGBTQ+ messaging and who are unlearning strong biases. He also acknowledges the good intentions of church members who seek to be allies, while emphasizing the importance of impact and teaching how some common approaches (including “love the sinner hate the sin,” and “It’s fine if you’re gay as long as you don’t act on it”) cause unintended harm.

I can’t recommend this more for any members of the LDS faith who want to be better allies and make their church a more inclusive, loving place.

[Carter Moore · Rating 3 out of 5]

I definitely prefer Charlie’s second book over his first book. This novel exposes the internalized homophobia present within the church culture. It also admonishes church members to foster inclusion.

Charlie provides specific strategies to accomplish this feat; however, I still believe that total transformation is unattainable based on the current teachings of the church.

I continue to wrestle with simultaneously embracing my identity and my spirituality on a daily basis. This constant tug-of-war is the root of deep distress. I desperately wish to one day discover inner peace.

I rate this book a 3 because it offers a glimmer of hope yet it also demonstrates the direness of the situation the church finds itself in. There is a call to change and I pray the church proactively responds.

[Kelsie Stroud · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everyone needs to read this. I am amazed at Charlie’s willingness to take on such a hard roll as advocate for gay members of the church and yet that’s what he is pleading for us to do as well. He shares so many vulnerable experiences and practical ways that as members of The Church of Jesus Christ or just as HUMANS that we can make one another feel welcomed, accepted, and loved regardless of the choices one another may make. I hope to read this many times over in hopes of not only becoming a better advocate for other LGBTQ members but also to learn how to better minister to and love everyone around me. I am in awe at Charlie’s testimony and so grateful for his willingness to share.

[Kristen Weller · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was admittedly nervous to read this book. But I saw a post by the author saying this book was written for people like me- a covenant keeping member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints who is trying to learn how to be more loving and accepting to all of God’s children. Some parts were hard and uncomfortable- mostly because it opened my eyes to experiences completely unfamiliar to me. I appreciate the author Charlie’s bravery and willingness to help educate and inspire. I came away with a determination to include and show love for all those around me, to be mindful in the way I speak about those in the margins, and to continue my own journey on the covenant path.

[Mallory · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. I have no words. I honestly believe every member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints needs to read this book. At times, it was heartbreaking to hear about the very real, very painful experiences that many gay Latter-day Saints face, but Charlie also paints a very hopeful picture of what we as a community can become if each of us does the work to learn how to love a little better. Just what I needed this week.

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I devoured this book in 3 days.

I read while I ate. I couldn't put it down.

I loved how much Charlie Bird talked about his relationship with Jesus Christ.

Charlie Bird is very real, raw, honest and poignant and really helps the reader understand what it's like to be a gay Latter-Day saint.

I think my biggest takeaway is to "see people deeply" and to love as Christ loves.

I also loved his insights from working as a therapist at BYU.

I definitely recommend!

[Lindsay Wilcox · Rating 5 out of 5]

I need every member of my church to read this book and take it to heart. I will admit that I had my doubts about this book and about Charlie Bird’s skills as a writer. I was blown away. Not only is he a good writer, he is good at not shying away from difficult parts of his life and aspects of our church. Seriously. Buy this book and read it.

[Kadi · Rating 5 out of 5]

There's so much to learn from other people's stories and I loved learning through Charlie's perspective as a gay Latter-day Saint.

"To me, it is no wonder that Christ is known as the Advocate. His concern for the vulnerable and voiceless is unparalleled and evident in everything He does...We become disciples of Christ when we become advocates, like Him."

[Caitlin Sheffer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was excellent and so powerful. I think every Latter-day Saint should read this. Some parts broke my heart but it renewed my conviction to mourn with those that mourn and sit with people’s pain. Thanks for sharing your voice with us Charlie.

[Bekka · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was better than I was expecting. Charlie Bird was direct and honest about what it feels like to be Mormon and gay and all the ways we can, should, and need to be better. I’m looking forward to hearing him speak this weekend.

[Ashley Holmes · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 ⭐️
This book is so good. The stories are wonderful and they so clearly show the points Charlie is trying to make. I wish everyone could read this so we could all learn to be more understanding and accepting of these children of God who need our love — not our judgment. 🏳️‍🌈🤍