I'm Jewish and observant. I live in the Pacific Northwest, where there are not too many Jews.
Three stars, and rating may change. I had...to really organize my thoughts and think about this one. I hesitate to even write this review. Why is it pointed out repeatedly that the rabbi is a millenial? So am I: 1988. Doesn't mean anything really. Was it some kind of "she's young so she's modern and with the times"? Bad message if that's it. Being young doesn't necessarily mean modern. She speaks at length about Judaism and Jewishness -in New York.- Some of us live in the Pacific Northwest and have -drastically- different experiences of Judaism and Jewishness. New York is not the end-all, be-all. She mentions Jews in LA in passing, and in Chicago in passing. LA and Chicago have huge Jewish populations. New York, LA, and Chicago are all in the top five as far as largest Jewish populations. She kind of acts increasingly like the only ones are in New York. Certain passages make it clear she thinks the only ones who -matter- are in New York. The writing is super self-absorbed in this regard. It was difficult to read.
One of her chapters examining antisemitism in the Xtian community in particular was TOTALLY ACCURATE. Dead on. I saw experiences I regularly have and I felt validated. She mentions several times that she doesn't "look" Jewish and yeah, that's a thing. She pairs this once with a passage about how Orthodox Jewish men in New York never ask her to shake the luvlav to fulfill a mitzvah, and she clearly feels left out. THIS IS SPECIFIC TO NEW YORK. QUIT ACTING LIKE IT'S NOT. Seattle does not have that. I would be shocked if Portland did, and I would have a lot of questions. And then she declares if you're Jewish and not a Zionist, you too are antisemitic. Leviticus 19:18 in the Hebrew Bible addresses self-loathing Jews. They exist. I have met more than a few. Zionism has nothing to do with it. She's shoving a deeply divisive political opinion into a book on antisemitism and declaring it fact. Rabbi, this makes you a jerk. People who have never met anyone Jewish are gonna read that and instantly think--but that's exactly what you want to happen. You are not impartial and never intended to be. I am dismayed and deeply disappointed in you, a person I have never met. I am anti-Zionist and Jewish. I don't support how Israel is treating Palestinians. My Judaism is important to me. This is not up for discussion.
She briefly mentions "Everyone Loves Dead Jews" by Dara Horn. I responded much, much more positively to that book. I couldn't put that one down, whereas I increasingly "had" to get through this. I did not have to. I chose to. Rabbi Fesko is obviously trying to be cute when she asks in a "blink and you miss it" moment something like "why does everyone tweet?' after pointing out she again found something on twitter. That's not cute, Rabbi. Everyone tweets because it's a popular site. You -sought- stuff out from twitter. Acknowledge it. Good conversations can happen on there.
While Rabbi Fesko does make good points in her book at times, and made me think on things and ponder, and one chapter was super accurate to my experiences here in PNW where there are few Jews...I don't recommend this. I'm sorry. I really am. It's a good thing I read it but...please also first read "Everyone Loves Dead Jews" by Dara Horn. I wanted to firmly recommend this left and right and talk about it meaning something. I can't, and I'm moody about it