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The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death
Alexandra Wyman was plunged into grief when her husband died by suicide. The sudden loss of the love of her life left her reeling with unanswered questions.
In The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death, Alexandra explores her journey of mourning and healing after losing her husband. She makes sense of her grief through three phases—Shock and Awe, Now What?, and Finding the Collateral Beauty—to offer a road back to peace and joy for anyone who has lost someone close to them to suicide.
The aftermath of suicide leaves loved ones in a mess of emotions. The Suicide Club shows a way forward through any anger, blame, or judgment, toward acceptance and peace.
In The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death, Alexandra explores her journey of mourning and healing after losing her husband. She makes sense of her grief through three phases—Shock and Awe, Now What?, and Finding the Collateral Beauty—to offer a road back to peace and joy for anyone who has lost someone close to them to suicide.
The aftermath of suicide leaves loved ones in a mess of emotions. The Suicide Club shows a way forward through any anger, blame, or judgment, toward acceptance and peace.
132 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 29, 2022
12 people are currently reading
720 people want to read
About the author
Alexandra Wyman
1 book8 followersI am an advocate and public speaker for resources in the aftermath of suicide. After I lost my husband to suicide in August of 2020, I found a need to change the rhetoric around suicide. I have spoken at the Colorado School Counselor Association’s annual conference; the Orthodox Christian Association of Medicine, Psychology, and Religion (OCAMPR) annual conference; and Bridging the Divide Suicide Prevention and Awareness Summit 2022. I have also been a guest on the YouDoWoo podcast. I practice occupational therapy and live in Colorado with my son.
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
November 14, 2022
This book was phenomenal and so well written. Alexandra did such a great job of painting a picture of her own journey of healing after losing her husband to suicide. You could feel her growth throughout the chapters. This book is raw, vulnerable, hard, beautiful and should be on everyone’s shelf.
My own lover has suicide in his family and it’s always been a difficult conversation. This book really helped to have some of those tough conversation that so easily get swept under the rug. Wymans story helped to process our own emotions as she shared so openly and vulnerably. Her perspective on suicide is inspiring.
This is such a special book that will help so many.
10/10 recommend.
My own lover has suicide in his family and it’s always been a difficult conversation. This book really helped to have some of those tough conversation that so easily get swept under the rug. Wymans story helped to process our own emotions as she shared so openly and vulnerably. Her perspective on suicide is inspiring.
This is such a special book that will help so many.
10/10 recommend.
July 11, 2023
Not a book I had wanted to read but I’m glad it exists. A close friend’s wife recently chose to end her life and I am still struggling to understand.
February 15, 2023
I can only imagine how difficult it will be to cope with the suicide of a loved one. The Suicide Club is just the structured and empathetic guide one will need when encountering and dealing with such a scenario.
Wyman has divided the book into 3 phases that an individual goes through, namely, shock and awe, now what? And lastly, finding the collateral beauty in everything.
The driving force of this narrative is the real-life experience of the author of her husband's suicide, which makes the journey more reliable. Only someone who has suffered themselves can most often understand the pain of others.
This can prove really helpful to navigate your life through grief, pain, suffering, anger, and coming out of it with acceptance while moving forward. The author has narrated her personal story and what all she went through which connects to the reader and will make you emotional.
The author guides the readers in every step, from taking care of the deceased belongings to busting myths and misunderstandings, to answering the various questions from others. Her experience of suddenly becoming a single mom and dealing with feeling undeserving, unworthy, and being on her own, are problems that come with such a tragedy.
She provides ways to rebuild oneself-being compassion towards self, therapy, support groups and even finding things to look forward to. She mentions creating boundaries, emotional firsts, guilt, and dealing with anniversaries.
She mentions the movie- Collateral Beauty and the positive impact of embracing grief. I appreciate how the author has penned down the business side of the aftermath of death as well, from death certificates, autopsy, and assets, to the last thing that has been covered. The narration in the form of asking genuine questions was very much needed and fulfilled. Overall, a touching yet practical read.
“The wound is the place where the light enters you.” —Rumi
Wyman has divided the book into 3 phases that an individual goes through, namely, shock and awe, now what? And lastly, finding the collateral beauty in everything.
The driving force of this narrative is the real-life experience of the author of her husband's suicide, which makes the journey more reliable. Only someone who has suffered themselves can most often understand the pain of others.
This can prove really helpful to navigate your life through grief, pain, suffering, anger, and coming out of it with acceptance while moving forward. The author has narrated her personal story and what all she went through which connects to the reader and will make you emotional.
The author guides the readers in every step, from taking care of the deceased belongings to busting myths and misunderstandings, to answering the various questions from others. Her experience of suddenly becoming a single mom and dealing with feeling undeserving, unworthy, and being on her own, are problems that come with such a tragedy.
She provides ways to rebuild oneself-being compassion towards self, therapy, support groups and even finding things to look forward to. She mentions creating boundaries, emotional firsts, guilt, and dealing with anniversaries.
She mentions the movie- Collateral Beauty and the positive impact of embracing grief. I appreciate how the author has penned down the business side of the aftermath of death as well, from death certificates, autopsy, and assets, to the last thing that has been covered. The narration in the form of asking genuine questions was very much needed and fulfilled. Overall, a touching yet practical read.
“The wound is the place where the light enters you.” —Rumi
July 9, 2023
Title: The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death
Author: Alexandra Wyman
Review:
"The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death" by Alexandra Wyman is a poignant and deeply personal exploration of grief, healing, and finding hope after losing a loved one to suicide. Through her own journey of mourning and self-discovery, Wyman offers solace, understanding, and guidance to those who have experienced similar devastating losses.
The book is divided into three phases—Shock and Awe, Now What?, and Finding the Collateral Beauty—each representing a stage in the author's own process of coping with the aftermath of her husband's suicide. This structure allows readers to follow along as Wyman progresses through her grief, providing a relatable and empathetic perspective for those who may be going through a similar experience.
One of the strengths of "The Suicide Club" is Wyman's ability to confront the complex emotions that often accompany suicide. She fearlessly delves into the feelings of anger, blame, and judgment that can arise, both towards the deceased and oneself, and offers insights and strategies for moving towards acceptance and peace. The author's honesty and vulnerability make the book highly relatable, creating a sense of connection and understanding with the reader.
Another notable aspect of the book is Wyman's emphasis on finding hope and beauty amidst the pain. She introduces the concept of "collateral beauty," which refers to the positive outcomes and personal growth that can arise from tragedy. Through personal anecdotes, reflections, and practical advice, she encourages readers to seek meaning and purpose in their own lives, even in the face of profound loss.
"The Suicide Club" is not just a memoir; it is a guidebook for those navigating the complicated aftermath of suicide. Wyman's writing is compassionate, insightful, and at times poetic, making it a compelling read for anyone who has been touched by suicide. The book offers not only comfort and validation but also actionable steps and resources to support the healing process.
However, it's worth noting that given the sensitive subject matter, the book may be triggering for some readers who have recently experienced a loss by suicide. Therefore, it is advisable to approach the book with caution and consider one's own emotional readiness before reading.
Overall, "The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death" is a brave and compassionate exploration of grief and healing. Alexandra Wyman's personal journey, combined with her insights and practical guidance, makes this book a valuable resource for anyone seeking understanding and support in the wake of a suicide loss.
Author: Alexandra Wyman
Review:
"The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death" by Alexandra Wyman is a poignant and deeply personal exploration of grief, healing, and finding hope after losing a loved one to suicide. Through her own journey of mourning and self-discovery, Wyman offers solace, understanding, and guidance to those who have experienced similar devastating losses.
The book is divided into three phases—Shock and Awe, Now What?, and Finding the Collateral Beauty—each representing a stage in the author's own process of coping with the aftermath of her husband's suicide. This structure allows readers to follow along as Wyman progresses through her grief, providing a relatable and empathetic perspective for those who may be going through a similar experience.
One of the strengths of "The Suicide Club" is Wyman's ability to confront the complex emotions that often accompany suicide. She fearlessly delves into the feelings of anger, blame, and judgment that can arise, both towards the deceased and oneself, and offers insights and strategies for moving towards acceptance and peace. The author's honesty and vulnerability make the book highly relatable, creating a sense of connection and understanding with the reader.
Another notable aspect of the book is Wyman's emphasis on finding hope and beauty amidst the pain. She introduces the concept of "collateral beauty," which refers to the positive outcomes and personal growth that can arise from tragedy. Through personal anecdotes, reflections, and practical advice, she encourages readers to seek meaning and purpose in their own lives, even in the face of profound loss.
"The Suicide Club" is not just a memoir; it is a guidebook for those navigating the complicated aftermath of suicide. Wyman's writing is compassionate, insightful, and at times poetic, making it a compelling read for anyone who has been touched by suicide. The book offers not only comfort and validation but also actionable steps and resources to support the healing process.
However, it's worth noting that given the sensitive subject matter, the book may be triggering for some readers who have recently experienced a loss by suicide. Therefore, it is advisable to approach the book with caution and consider one's own emotional readiness before reading.
Overall, "The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death" is a brave and compassionate exploration of grief and healing. Alexandra Wyman's personal journey, combined with her insights and practical guidance, makes this book a valuable resource for anyone seeking understanding and support in the wake of a suicide loss.
November 16, 2022
I would like to preface with, I have not had a personal or close experience with suicide but have many friends that have.
I read The Suicide Club in under 48 hours. I cried, I text some friends to check in, I smiled, I cried some more and then I soaked. I reveled in the knowledge that Alexandra shared as she went on her healing journey. I learned that I too have said some naive comments that possibly made people who have experienced suicide feel emotions I didn’t mean to trigger. I have taken this insight and changed my own narrative when discussing the topic of suicide.
She wrote so deeply, I could feel her pain. I wanted to hug her. Her struggle (and her honesty about it) throughout this journey made her relatable. I could relate to the people-pleasing nature and guilt laden thoughts bombarding her brain. The honesty in which she describes the ebbs and flow of the grief process is something everyone can relate to. I felt the spiral of emotions and wondered myself how I could ever manage if I were in her shoes.
Even though this is a memoir and relates specifically to her situation, Alexandra touches base on how it may differ for other types of loss/tragedies and often brings in examples from friends and support groups experiences. She offers suggestions to common negative and pitiful responses one may receive when learning she lost her husband to suicide. And more importantly she addresses how they react and offers alternatives when communicating in these situations. Even as an outsider to suicide, I felt she had a lot of useful tips on how to navigate your emotions and how to communicate more successfully in high stress situations.
I would recommend this book to anyone and everyone looking to gain knowledge about suicide or the grief that comes with it. And more simply, those who have experienced any sort of trauma, no matter how small. I found the chapters on “the why,” forgiveness, rebuilding, and boundaries (along with many other exerts) cross over more than just suicide.
I read The Suicide Club in under 48 hours. I cried, I text some friends to check in, I smiled, I cried some more and then I soaked. I reveled in the knowledge that Alexandra shared as she went on her healing journey. I learned that I too have said some naive comments that possibly made people who have experienced suicide feel emotions I didn’t mean to trigger. I have taken this insight and changed my own narrative when discussing the topic of suicide.
She wrote so deeply, I could feel her pain. I wanted to hug her. Her struggle (and her honesty about it) throughout this journey made her relatable. I could relate to the people-pleasing nature and guilt laden thoughts bombarding her brain. The honesty in which she describes the ebbs and flow of the grief process is something everyone can relate to. I felt the spiral of emotions and wondered myself how I could ever manage if I were in her shoes.
Even though this is a memoir and relates specifically to her situation, Alexandra touches base on how it may differ for other types of loss/tragedies and often brings in examples from friends and support groups experiences. She offers suggestions to common negative and pitiful responses one may receive when learning she lost her husband to suicide. And more importantly she addresses how they react and offers alternatives when communicating in these situations. Even as an outsider to suicide, I felt she had a lot of useful tips on how to navigate your emotions and how to communicate more successfully in high stress situations.
I would recommend this book to anyone and everyone looking to gain knowledge about suicide or the grief that comes with it. And more simply, those who have experienced any sort of trauma, no matter how small. I found the chapters on “the why,” forgiveness, rebuilding, and boundaries (along with many other exerts) cross over more than just suicide.
February 13, 2024
The Suicide Club by Alexandra Wyman is a raw, honest account of a wife’s journey after the loss of her husband to suicide. The topic of suicide is often taboo and not often discussed, which leaves those affected by it, in further isolation in despair. Ms. Wyman is trying to help those affected by the loss of a loved one to suicide by putting her journey to paper. This is a difficult book to read, as her loss comes through each page. However, a necessary book if you have suffered the loss of someone you love to suicide. Alexandra offers tips to other survivors of suicide including financial advice should you ever find yourself in this position. Her strength shines through as she perseveres through this tragic event that will undoubtedly affect her the rest of her life as she raises her son as a widowed mother. This book provides compassionate and sensible advice to the reader. Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the advance review copy in exchange for my honest review.
October 1, 2024
In The Suicide Club, Alexandra Wyman shares her personal story of losing her husband to suicide while holding the hand of those who may also have lost a loved one. Wyman shares her grief process and the emotions and difficult situations she navigated in the shadow of her husband's death, but also provides practical help for dealing with the business of taking care of everything that comes in the face of someone's death - managing finances, belongings, life insurance, and family disagreements. Wyman's book is definitely centered on the experience of losing a spouse or long term partner, but I as someone who lost a brother, I think anyone who lost a loved one to suicide would find some benefit in the pages. Wyman's ability to share some of the hardest moments of her life with us and to help guide us through the forest as well is truly exceptional.
July 19, 2023
After the death by suicide of her beloved husband and father of her child, Alexandra writes about her experience and lessons learned in a kind of manual on how to survive something so difficult.
This is the first book I have read on the subject of suicide, and aside from how traumatic it was for the author, it is very well written and explained.
Alexandra honestly shares her experiences, thoughts, beliefs, and pain. In addition to a number of resources and strategies that helped her initially recover from such a terrible death.
It is hard to put yourself in her husband's shoes and understand why he made this decision, and even harder after seeing the photos at the end of the book.
If you know someone who has suffered such a trauma, don't hesitate to recommend this book to them.
This is the first book I have read on the subject of suicide, and aside from how traumatic it was for the author, it is very well written and explained.
Alexandra honestly shares her experiences, thoughts, beliefs, and pain. In addition to a number of resources and strategies that helped her initially recover from such a terrible death.
It is hard to put yourself in her husband's shoes and understand why he made this decision, and even harder after seeing the photos at the end of the book.
If you know someone who has suffered such a trauma, don't hesitate to recommend this book to them.
August 24, 2023
This book is very sad, but if you're reading it you're probably very sad as well. I read this at the encouragement of my therapist when I was having difficulty processing my spouse's completed suicide. Wyman's story is a difficult one to read and there are some very difficult similarities in my own experience, so reading it was very helpful. Wyman gives me more hope than I had before I started this book. She has many practical details, but also makes herself so vulnerable sharing what she's been through. I felt like I had a friend to talk to that this same thing happened to. It felt nice and very little pressure for me. Thank you for writing it, Alexandra. It must take such courage.
June 17, 2023
Trigger Warning: Suicide
I want to give this author a ginormous hug for her raw, honest and unflinching vulnerability with writing this book.
Suicide is still something that not a lot of people talk about but more discussion around the topic is needed.
As sometime who struggles with mental health on a daily basis and worked in the mental health field for over a decade I highly recommend this book to anyone who has lost a loved one to mental illness.
I want to give this author a ginormous hug for her raw, honest and unflinching vulnerability with writing this book.
Suicide is still something that not a lot of people talk about but more discussion around the topic is needed.
As sometime who struggles with mental health on a daily basis and worked in the mental health field for over a decade I highly recommend this book to anyone who has lost a loved one to mental illness.
July 20, 2023
Trigger Warning: Suicide
I want to give this author a hug for her raw, honest vulnerability with writing this book. Suicide is still something that not a lot of people talk about but more discussion around the topic is needed. As sometime who struggles with mental health on a daily basis, I highly recommend this book to anyone who has lost a loved one to mental illness.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an e-ARC of this book.
I want to give this author a hug for her raw, honest vulnerability with writing this book. Suicide is still something that not a lot of people talk about but more discussion around the topic is needed. As sometime who struggles with mental health on a daily basis, I highly recommend this book to anyone who has lost a loved one to mental illness.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an e-ARC of this book.
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June 6, 2024How could you not wonder what you could have done differently when someone you love dies by suicide? How are you supposed to feel? How do you cope? The Suicide Club: What to Do When Someone You Love Chooses Death is Alexandra Wyman’s story of pain, struggling, and recovery.
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June 9, 2023
This is a great book for grieving spouses who lost their loved ones by suicide. The author goes through each stage of her grief. Her experience, her feelings, her thoughts. This is a quick read and emotional…please check trigger warnings. I would recommend this book to anyone who is struggling with their loss of a loved one.
December 15, 2022
Helpful to anyone struggling after a family/friend commits suicide.
January 27, 2023
Thank you for the free kindle copy.
Well written.
Well written.
February 19, 2023
Phenomenal writing. So moving, inspiring and touches the soul. Thank you goodreads for winning this fabulous giveaway.
July 7, 2023
I unfortunately was not able to get through this book due to triggers but I am sure it is a beautiful book!
September 4, 2023
Heartbreaking - but very informative and helpful for those dealing with grief.
July 16, 2024
Not a book I wanted to read but I found some comfort in knowing I wasn't alone in "the suicide club". Alexandra was so honest in her journey through grief, healing and growth.
November 14, 2024
Wow! So sad. It was a tough read for sure. Suicide is horrible. I don’t know how the author was able to finish this book. There is no way I could have. So raw and real.
Thank you to NetGalley and Alexandra Wyman for this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
Thank you to NetGalley and Alexandra Wyman for this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews