Secret Rules to Being a Rockstar

by Jessamyn Violet

Acclaimed musician Jessamyn Violet’s debut LGBTQA+ novel sizzles with a coming-of-age story set in an industry of ambition, secrets, lies, and utter joy.

Eighteen-year-old Kyla Bell dreams of one day being a professional musician... but gets little to no support from her parents. Still, she practices every day and performs locally, harboring her own secret hopes. One night, her dreams are answered in the form of sultry rocker Ruby Sky, the magnetic frontwoman of her favorite band, Glitter Tears. Ruby hears Kyla perform and asks her to join the band on keys for their upcoming tour. 

In order to accept, Kyla must drop out of her Western Massachusetts high school and move to Los Angeles immediately to live with a renowned yet highly volatile producer who has agreed to put her through "rock star boot camp" in a matter of weeks. Blindsided by her emerging feelings for Ruby Sky, Kyla tumbles through the lights and shadows of the 90s music scene in Los Angeles. 

Genres: Young Adult, LGBT, Historical Fiction, Contemporary, Queer, Lesbian, Fiction

288 pages, Paperback

First published April 18, 2023

About the author

Jessamyn Violet is a writer and musician, born and raised in Massachusetts. She received her BFA in Writing, Literature and Publishing from Emerson College, and her MFA in Creative Writing from San Francisco's California College of the Arts. In Los Angeles, she has written for entertainment magazines, interviewing celebrities including John Green and Matt Groening, and worked in film production. Her poetry collection, Organ Thieves (Gauss PDF), was published in 2017. Her full-length screenplay “Exit Strategies” was a quarterfinalist in Scriptapalooza in 2018. Her short stories have been published in Ploughshares (forthcoming, Spring 2023), 805 Art + Lit Magazine, Adelaide and Little Break and Three Elements. Jessamyn plays drums for the band Movie Club. Secret Rules to being a Rockstar is her debut novel. She currently lives in Venice Beach, California.

Reviews

[Trisha]

sounds adorable and I love this cover!

A huge thank you to the author and publisher for providing an e-ARC via Edelweiss. This does not affect my opinion regarding the book.

[Starr ❇✌❇ · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received an ARC from Edelweiss
TW: mentioned car accident, bodyshaming & fatphobia, substance abuse & peer pressure, abortion & mentioned botched abortion, attempted suicide, sexual harassment & mentioned sexually inappropriate teacher, homophobic parent, delusions
3

This book was a bit of an odd experience for me! While I enjoyed the reading experience in general, it didn’t really resonate with me and had a few moments that struck me strangely.

The coming of age, as downwards tilted and bittersweet as it is, is definitely readable. And the characters are all interesting and feel 3-dimensional. There is something captivating about these people and the lack of certainty how things will play out makes it hard to keep from reading.

However, I was hoping for more concrete drama instead of mostly philosophy. The plot doesn’t have dynamic arcs, and while I did care about the character it was hard to feel hooked consistently. I also feel that the only character growth that happened on page felt too weak and temporary. It didn’t feel organic and it didn’t feel powerful enough to be lasting.

This was a short, somewhat slow moving story, with less plot than expected but very interesting characters.

[Samantha]

"Maybe blame was something easier turned inward, but who knew what forces were to blame for loving each other imperfectly?"

Very impressed with this debut novel from Jessamyn Violet. Definitely recommend to YA fans who dream of a creative future.

The setting pulled me back to my teens in the 90s and how rock stars still ruled the stage with a mysterious celebrity that was unattainable to the random marching band kid I was. But the trials and tribulations of being a teen thrown into rock stardom really drew me into the story.

Thank you to the Jessamyn Violet and Three Rooms Press for providing an e-ARC via Edelweiss for my honest review.

[Jessica Rush · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
👩🏼‍🎤🎹🎤🏳️‍🌈

I really enjoyed this 1990s-era set book by Jessamyn Violet

It is about an 18-year-old girl, singer/songwriter and piano player named Kyla Bell who is given the opportunity to open for a band after playing in her local pub. At the concert, she is headhunted by a lead singer of one of her favourite rock bands, Ruby Sky. There she is thrown into the world of rockstars and everything that comes with it as the band's keyboard player.

Along the way, Kyla opens up to herself about who she is, what she likes, and doesn't like, and whom she likes. She likes girls, particularly the lead singer of the band she is, and her headhunter, Ruby. Other than the drug use and being a rockstar, I felt like Kyla's story mirrored my own.

This book talks about the hard truths of being a rockstar, including fat shaming, drug use, alcoholism, and the pressure of being famous. There is anxiety and talk of suicide and abortions. Kyla's mother has also got a mental illness caused by a car accident, which Kyla had spent helping her before she went to join the band.

I loved the way that it spoke truths, but also the way that it opens your eyes to what was happening in the 90s.

I loved how the book is written in rule numbers, rather than chapters. It is unique, and something I haven't seen before.

This was a great debut by Jessamyn and I'm delighted I received a copy of an ebook in exchange for an honest review.

[Naoé · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was definitely darker that what I thought it would be but I enjoyed it a lot. I liked the 90’ vibe of it and the journey of the main character and her growth and strength.
It was a touching story about dreams and family and feeling enough and not enough at the same time about leaving home and finding a new place to make a home.
Basically I really liked it

[Melissa Kitson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a phenomenal debut YA novel and will be releasing for purchase 4/18/23! The female main character is queer and trying to figure things out and I really connected with her in a way I typically don’t experience. The book deals with living the LA lifestyle, but there were several valuable lessons webbed throughout the pages that I feel would benefit teens in general. Loved it!

[Kiri · Rating 4 out of 5]

Won this in a giveaway. So I'm not sure the drama of being a rockstar is completely my cup of tea. I spent a lot of this book being terrified for Kyla, and I hope younger readers understand that the risks she took are not risks everyone should take. Also have to demote a star because I feel like enough wasn't done to discourage...well any of the bad habits in this book. Smoking, drinking, crash diets. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't totally made okay, but wasn't condemned enough for my personal taste, but that's on me. Glad for Kyla to be able to openly talk about her sexuality by the end, though. It makes me feel like a sequel could happen, I hope Kyla does okay, maybe because a great mentor for others like her when she's older at the very least.

[Misha · Rating 2 out of 5]

Perhaps my expectations were misaligned but I did not enjoy this much. Watching an 18 year old leave school to be exploited constantly by narcissists and toxic people with no contract or any other protection was not fun for me and the story doesn't really progress in any meaningful way for me. This was fine, but not one I enjoyed, unfortunately.

[Lisa · Rating 2 out of 5]

Kyla is a talented musician who quits school at the end of senior year to go play in a band with a nutty rockstar named Ruby Sky who has purple hair and a tear tattooed under her eye—i.e., irresistable. Kyla's father is bereft because she's just been awarded a full scholarship to Mt Holyoke and she's not even going to get her HS diploma. He tells her all the red flags she's not seeing, and she doesn't listen ... and then they all go up the flagpole in L.A. Ruby turns out to be borderline/narcissistic (either loves you or hates you) and totally unstable. In L.A. Kyla trains to be a rockstar by living with a depressed to the point of suicide aging producer, partying with rapy guys (one of whom she goes on a date with, which she later celebrates with her friend from home), drinking too much, picking up cigarettes, sampling hard drugs, succumbing to body-shaming, coaching someone through a self-induced abortion, being a victim of random violence, and nearly getting fired from the band after being toyed with as a sexual object. You can see why, after she comes to visit her mama in McLean's, she's in a hurry to return and feel the magic. The one and only positive growth Kyla exhibits is coming to terms with her sexuality, which unfortunately then appears to be the development that pushes her once supportive mom off the ledge and which her best friend from home either accepts or doesn't—it's unclear—in an insanely self-contradictory bit of dialogue that seems like a quick way end to that friendship. All that being said, I admire anyone who can finish writing a book.

[Forever Young Adult]

Graded By: Scout Luna
Cover Story: Candy-colored Coat
BFF Charm: Oda Mae Brown
Swoonworthy Scale: 1
Talky Talk: Whose Voice Is It, Anyway?
Bonus Factor: The 90s
Anti-Bonus Factor: Drugs, Drinking, and Debauchery
Relationship Status: No Second Date

Read the full book report here.

[hannah! (lowkey gone)]

this was not for me. i just don’t enjoy reading about young girls being degraded by men i guess

it was so much darker than i thought it would be tbh

[dana · Rating 3 out of 5]

my blog // my twitter

Thank you to Three Rooms Press for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review! 💖


Secret Rules to Being a Rockstar was the YA whirlwind that the summary promised, but it didn’t deliver the commentary I’d expected.

Kyla is a relatable 18-year-old protagonist. She hasn’t “found herself” yet even though she’s nearing the end of high school, her parents don’t understand her dreams, and she feels confined by her Western Massachusetts environment. Her spontaneously moving to LA as a rockstar-in-training happened very very quickly, but it wasn’t unbelievable, though I was a bit surprised that she didn’t have more reservations.

The unhealthy environment Kyla encounters in LA seems pretty true to the “dark side” of fame, especially in the 90s. She encounters a lot of destructive behaviors, from fat shaming to drug and alcohol abuse, and engages in the behaviors largely due to pressure from others in the industry. I feel like these practices were supposed to be condemned, but Kyla never obviously realized that; she would recognize the influences she was under but kept giving in to them without growth. At some points, it felt glamorized.

I also wish the story had dwelled more on her relationships. Her parents, for instance, have their own tragic backgrounds, but they’re hardly mentioned once Kyla moves to LA. The same goes for Jenny, Kyla’s best friend from home. Although Jenny’s consistently kind and supportive, Kyla doesn’t try to stay in touch with her. There was some unfulfilled potential to discuss how Kyla kept giving up healthy/caring relationships for unhealthy ones.

Ultimately, Secret Rules to Being a Rockstar had a strong premise and touched upon important points, but it didn’t fully examine/critique them as much as I wanted.

[Motherbooker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Being born in 1988, I love a bit of 90s nostalgia. I admit that my experience of the 90s was very different to 18-year-old Kyla Bell's. Kyla is a pianist and singer-songwriter from Massachusetts. She dreams of being a star but her father would much prefer she stay closer to home. So, when she gets the chance to join her favourite band Glitter Tears, Kyla must decide between her family and her future. If she agrees, Kyla has to drop out of school and move to LA for rock star training. Can this small-town girl make it in the big city? Or will she find herself out of her depth and going down a dark path?

Secret Rules to Being a Rockstar is certainly a captivating novel. It's the classic story of a slightly sheltered girl being catapulted into the spotlight. Kyla is a sweet girl but has a lot to learn about life. She is figuring out who she is and where she fits into the world. Unfortunately for her, the people she meets in LA aren't the best people to help her figure it out. Her mentor is Robert a man who is jaded and depressed after his recent marriage break-up. He encourages Kyla to join in on his self-destructive behaviour as he battles with his demons. Then there is Ruby Sky, the lead singer of Glitter Tears and Kyla's hero. Ruby has plenty of personal troubles and mental health issues. She treats Kyla as a pet and continually leads her on.

Something that causes Kyla to confront her sexuality. This is one of the more interesting and important aspects of the book and I wish more time was spent on it. For me, this plot strange felt a bit rushed in places. Kyla doesn't get much time to understand her sexuality and there are parts of the plot that just seem to get dropped. This side of the story doesn't feel as though it got a strong enough ending. I'm all for open-ended books but some things deserve to have a bit more closure. Especially the way Kyla's sexuality affects her relationships back home. For me, the novel doesn't leave things in a very positive way. It might be for good reasons but I wasn't happy when Kyla denied her true self towards the end of the novel.

There is also a lot of destructive behaviour on show here. I don't think that is a bad thing per se but I would have preferred it to be more obviously condemned. Kyla is encouraged to starve herself, take up smoking to suppress her appetite, drink in excess and take whatever drugs she is offered. I understand that this is meant to be a behind-the-scenes of the music industry but there is only a couple of times when she is warned about the consequences of the lifestyle. There are times when her non-stop underage partying is glamourised. I would have preferred that the novel explore more of the consequences of this.

Overall, I think there was a lot to enjoy in this book and it is well-written. There is a lot of detail about the music scene and the 90s. Jessamyn Violet spends a lot of time describing the various fashion on show and the musical aspects of the book. She clearly knows what she's talking about. There are plenty of people who will enjoy this and I think it's a strong debut. I just don't think that this was the book for me. The story was interesting but quickly turned into a bit of a cliche. This wouldn't have been a problem had it actually had something important to say but there doesn't seem to be a message here. There are no consequences to anything. The ending seems too perfect for everything we've just been through.

[Christy Hallberg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Let me preface this review by saying Jessamyn was a recent guest on my podcast, Rock is Lit, the first and only podcast devoted to rock novels. What a wonderful time I had talking with this smart, sassy, funny, and oh-so-talented artist about not only her fabulous debut novel but also her fabulous band, Movie Club, a psychedelic rock duo in which Jessamyn plays killer drums.

'Secret Rules to Being a Rockstar' is a gritty YA LGBTQ novel about 18-year-old Kyla Bell, a teenage pianist and singer-songwriter who drops out of her Massachusetts high school to join her favorite rock band, Glitter Tears. She journeys to LA to undergo "rock star boot camp" at the instruction of a volatile record producer to get ready to go on tour with Glitter Tears. During her training, Kyla figures out that cultivating a rockstar persona is even more perilous and grueling than she imagined, especially if one doesn’t know the—ahem—rules to being a rockstar. Let's just say things don't go exactly according to plan, particularly when it comes to the complicated relationship Kyla is building with the band’s beguiling frontwoman, Ruby. That part of the novel will tug on your heartstrings and take you back to that time in your life when you had your first brush with love, in all its frustrating, confusing, exhilarating glory.

There is so much heart, spirit, and truth in Kyla's story. If you’re into the 1990s Los Angeles music scene, you’re gonna love this novel, as the setting and time play such a pivotal role in the story. And damn, Jessamyn Violet can write! Read this wonderful novel, then have a listen to my conversation with Jessamyn on Rock is Lit wherever you get your podcasts, or use the link below. Extra bonus: You’ll hear a few tracks by Movie Club in the episode.

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...

[Alisha (booksmellz) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Trigger Warnings: fat shaming, drug use, alcoholism, anxiety, talk of suicide, abortions

18-year-old Kyla Bell dreams of getting out of her dusty basement and playing the keys professionally, but she hardly gets any support from her parents. One night, her dreams are answered after the rocker Ruby Sky, frontwoman of her favorite band, Glitter Tears, hears Kyla perform and asks her to join the band for their upcoming tour.

In order to be ready for tour, Kyla must drop out of high school in the last few weeks of her senior year and immediately move out to LA to live with a producer who has agreed to put her through “rock star boot camp”.With her feelings towards Ruby emerging and the lifestyle of a rockstar, Kyla has a lot to learn as she stumbles through the 90s music scene of Lose Angelos.

This book definitely doesn’t sugar coat anything about the hard truths of rockstar life in the 90’s - there’s drugs, alcohol, fat shaming, abortions, and the stress of being in the public eye. I’m a ‘92 baby and grew up reading about all the craziness that happened back then, so it was interesting to see it from a band member’s point of view.

I had a little bit of a hard time with this one because of the exploitation of Kyla - which, the hard truths of rockstar life in the 90’s, I get that, but I wanted someone to look out for her better it didn’t seem like it was going to get any better by the end of the story and now I’m sitting here worrying about Kyla… .

Overall, I see a lot of people enjoying this book and behind the scenes of the rockstar life. It wasn’t 100% for me, and that’s okay. The story is interesting and kept my attention throughout it, but I kind of wish there was more to it.

*Thank you Three Rooms Press and LibraryThing for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review

[Ashley Dang · Rating 1 out of 5]

What happens when you are recruited to be part of your favorite band and suddenly find yourself leaving your small town life to move to LA and become a rockstar? Well eighteen year old Kyla Bell is about to find out. When she randomly ends up opening for a band she is then asked to join her favorite band Glitter Tears by the gorgeous rocker Ruby Sky, This is Kyla’s chance to make her dreams come true and she can’t pass it up, even if it means dropping out of high school and moving to Los Angeles. Kyla soon finds out that being a rocker isn’t all it’s cracked up to be especially when it comes to drugs, drama, and trying to be yourself when you are already trying to be someone else. She’ll find herself doing things and drugs she never imagined, trying to fit into the rocker lifestyle while dealing with the complicated feelings she has for Ruby and defining her own sexuality while realizing that not everything is as glamorous as it seems and that the music scene is cut throat. This one just fell flat for me, honestly I went into it blind hoping I would enjoy it more that way but found that I really didn’t care all that much for Kyla’s musician journey into being a LA Rocker. Honestly, even the ending of the book was so meh. This just missed the mark and unfortunately I didn’t care for it as much. The relationship drama, the music drama, and all of it was just eh. Overall, this one just missed the mark for me but if you are looking for a story about a young musician trying to make it in the 90′s music scene in Los Angeles, give it a go, maybe you’ll have a better time with it than me.

*Thank you Three Rooms Press for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[Vi · Rating 1 out of 5]

thank you to edelweiss plus for providing me with an advanced review copy in exchange for my honest opinion!
i hate writing negative reviews. i really do. but this book just did not satisfy what i was looking for. the premise is hopeful! seems fun! and then you get into it, and you’re not only disappointed, but upset.
here are some rapid-fire issues i had with the book. the author romanticizes substance abuse. the mc essentially develops an eating disorder which is barely even addressed (maybe two characters disdainfully comment on her loss of weight). there are unrivaled levels of fatphobia. the 18 year old mc has a massive crush on a 25 year old who KISSES HER and encourages her crush through flirtation. the characters who we’re supposed to root for are so hate-able. characters don’t seem motivated to do what they do, they kinda just do things just for the hell of it. really intense topics (such as su!cidal actions, dangerous at home abort!ons) are treated with nonchalance. there were random time jumps. and quite frankly, i wasn’t a fan of the writing style; it read like a middle school creative writing assignment.
long story short, i just didn’t like this book. i can’t think of any redeemable qualities off the top of my head, but i’m sure there were a few.

[Gabriel · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars

I was underwhelmed and confused by the direction of this book. The writing style read like something aimed at a young, maybe middle grade audience, while the ways in which sex, drug use, eating disorders, etc. were incorporated felt more suitable for the older end of YA, so I'm not sure what audience this book is for. Other than that I was also the destructive behaviors the characters engage in and pressure the main character, Kyla, into as well as the issue of mental illness are handled in a very shallow way. Two of the characters seem to just get over all of their very serious issues suddenly with little discussion towards the end. The way they push Kyla into doing things like starving herself if she wants to make it with them is glossed over by the end in a way that made it feel forgotten, not like there was a point to handling it like that.

The ending in general was unsatisfying for me, to much was left hanging for it to work even as an open ending and the way the message of the book was delivered felt forced in to try to make it feel more complete.

More could have been done with this story to give it more depth and a stronger finish.

[Lauren · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jessamyn Violet's YA debut throws protagonist Kyla Bell into the 1990s party-fueled, drug-addled LA music scene - where she needs to learn to grow up fast while tackling demons from her past. The plot speeds along as fast as Kyla Bell's rise to fame, yet Violet does not shy away from tackling heavy topics such as sexual orientation, women's reproductive rights, custodial guardianship, mental health, etc. A wildly fun read for everyone who's every dreamed of living the rock and roll life.

[m i l o u ✨ (Grumpy Hobbit) · Rating 2 out of 5]

Too immature for me I guess.





─── ･ ｡ﾟ:☆. *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───


↠ Genre: Young Adult Contemporary
↠ Reputation: Lesbian
↠Published: April 18th 2023
↠ Pov: First Person
↠ Type: Standalone
↠ Rating: 6.0 -

🌱☕️ ○ Milou the grumpy hobbit

[Julia Hahn · Rating 2 out of 5]

DNF @ 53% (page 170) I have no motivation left to try to finish this book. I’ve been reading bits here and there for at least two weeks and I can’t get into it. Maybe the pace picks up towards the end but I don’t care enough about Kyla (the main character) or the story to finish it.

[Bella Eng · Rating 3 out of 5]

super cute ya novel and i think the main character was super relatable in terms of personality for young girls. i wish the ending was more wrapped up? i feel like so many plot lines were opened and not enough were closed.

[Savannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

It just was.
It felt repetitive but slightly entertaining.
It was not my favorite but it was ok.
It just was another book nothing stood out to me personally but that's ok.
Would I recommend... Maybe to a 6th grader.

[talls · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so emotional and deep. I really loved sitting with the characters. I ended up reading most of this on a train while I was commuting that got stuck on the tracks for well over two hours and this got me through it.

[Sam · Rating 3 out of 5]

2 stars seems harsh so I'm rounding it up to 3 - unfortunately, it wasn't as good as I thought it would be.

[Kristen · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was cute and like… fine.

[Eavan Hooke · Rating 5 out of 5]

A young gifted 18 year old is" discovered " by a famous rock star and her life becomes a whirlwind. I was holding my breath throughout the book. Young Kyla Bell has to make decisions that most teenagers won't face at such a young age. Life in the rock world of Los Angeles is treacherous, the adults are always on stage seeking recognition and making poor decisions in their private lives. At times I wanted to hope Kyla would go home but she is a determined young girl and she fords a path through drugs, depression, abortion and sexuality.
This is a coming of age story and the difficult situations one person must decide to make. Thrust into
helping and comforting a friend who is depressed or walking away. Kyla finds she is a strong and smart person and can make a difference.
A very good read with deep insight in challenging situations.