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I Miss You, I Hate This
Five Feet Apart meets Kate in Waiting in this timely story of two best friends navigating the complexities of friendship while their world is turned upside down by a global pandemic, from the author of Americanized: Rebel Without a Green Card.
The lives of high school seniors Parisa Naficy and Gabriela Gonzales couldn't be more different. Parisa, an earnest and privileged Iranian American, struggles to live up to her own impossible standards. Gabriela, a cynical Mexican American, has all the confidence Parisa lacks but none of the financial stability. She can't help but envy Parisa's posh lifestyle whenever she hears her two moms argue about money. Despite their differences, as soon as they met on the first day of freshman year, they had an "us versus the world" mentality. Whatever the future had in store for them—the pressure to get good grades, the litany of family dramas, and the heartbreak of unrequited love—they faced it together. Until a global pandemic forces everyone into lockdown. Suddenly senior year doesn't look anything like they hoped it would. And as the whole world is tested during this time of crisis, their friendship will be, too.
With equal parts humor and heart, Parisa's and Gabriela's stories unfold in a mix of prose, text messages, and emails as they discover new dreams, face insecurities, and confront their greatest fears.
The lives of high school seniors Parisa Naficy and Gabriela Gonzales couldn't be more different. Parisa, an earnest and privileged Iranian American, struggles to live up to her own impossible standards. Gabriela, a cynical Mexican American, has all the confidence Parisa lacks but none of the financial stability. She can't help but envy Parisa's posh lifestyle whenever she hears her two moms argue about money. Despite their differences, as soon as they met on the first day of freshman year, they had an "us versus the world" mentality. Whatever the future had in store for them—the pressure to get good grades, the litany of family dramas, and the heartbreak of unrequited love—they faced it together. Until a global pandemic forces everyone into lockdown. Suddenly senior year doesn't look anything like they hoped it would. And as the whole world is tested during this time of crisis, their friendship will be, too.
With equal parts humor and heart, Parisa's and Gabriela's stories unfold in a mix of prose, text messages, and emails as they discover new dreams, face insecurities, and confront their greatest fears.
352 pages, Hardcover
First published October 11, 2022
29 people are currently reading
4642 people want to read
About the author
Sara Saedi
5 books222 followersSara Saedi was born in Tehran, Iran smack-dab in the middle of a war and an Islamic Revolution. She received a B.A. in Film and Mass Communications from the University of California, Berkeley and began her career as a creative executive for ABC Daytime. Since then she's penned three TV movies for ABC Family and a pilot for the Disney Channel, won a Daytime Emmy for What If..., a web series she wrote for ABC, and worked as a staff writer on the FOX sitcom The Goodwin Games.
Her first novel for young adults, Never Ever, was published in 2016 and its sequel, The Lost Kids, was published in spring 2018. Her memoir, Americanized: Rebel Without a Green Card was released in February 2018. Her latest novel, I Miss You, I Hate This comes out in October 2022.
She currently resides in Los Angeles with her husband, son, and pug, where she writes for the hit CW show iZombie. You can find her on Twitter at @saaaranotsarah or at SaraSaediWriter.com
Her first novel for young adults, Never Ever, was published in 2016 and its sequel, The Lost Kids, was published in spring 2018. Her memoir, Americanized: Rebel Without a Green Card was released in February 2018. Her latest novel, I Miss You, I Hate This comes out in October 2022.
She currently resides in Los Angeles with her husband, son, and pug, where she writes for the hit CW show iZombie. You can find her on Twitter at @saaaranotsarah or at SaraSaediWriter.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 87 reviews
September 26, 2022
I didn't expect this one to affect me as strongly as it did. After all, I made it through the pandemic relatively unscathed. I lost two years of my high school experience, sure, but that was about as minor as it could be.
Something about reading from the perspective of two characters that are the same age as me really hit though. I felt their pain. All of it felt so real and relatable. I almost found myself in tears several times. It was too real. It felt less like fiction and more like a journal. It felt completely real.
I really liked the friendship between Parisa and Gabriela. Again, it felt real. They had their struggles, but I loved watching them triumph. Neither of them were perfect, and it made them so much better.
So, even though I didn't expect to love this one, I did! It was realistic and relatable, and something I won't be forgetting anytime soon.
Something about reading from the perspective of two characters that are the same age as me really hit though. I felt their pain. All of it felt so real and relatable. I almost found myself in tears several times. It was too real. It felt less like fiction and more like a journal. It felt completely real.
I really liked the friendship between Parisa and Gabriela. Again, it felt real. They had their struggles, but I loved watching them triumph. Neither of them were perfect, and it made them so much better.
So, even though I didn't expect to love this one, I did! It was realistic and relatable, and something I won't be forgetting anytime soon.
December 9, 2022
It’s a little sad the amount of pandemic related YA books out in the world now and maybe a little sadder that I’ve read most of them. However, before reading this, there was only one that I loved. And now I’m glad to add this to the list. I love books about friendship and it was so sweet and heartbreaking to read about a friendship in the midst of a global pandemic (it’s COVID but with a different name…) and how it affects their senior year of high school. I found myself tearing up sometimes and I wasn’t even sure why but this was a great look into how hard lockdown was for teens specifically. I still think she should have just said it was COVID though but that’s just a personal preference.
November 16, 2022
2.5 stars rounded down.
I know a lot of people love this book, but it's a mixed bag for me. The story itself is well written, but the plot has way too much going on, the author really threw in everything but the kitchen sink. I understand with a book about a pandemic/lockdown, the author will wanna cover every aspect of life during it. However, there's gotta be a way to trim the fat so that there's less subplots and main ones don't get weighed down. Some stuff doesn't even hold that much impact to the overall story and felt thrown in just to show "This is how a pandemic affects this part of your life". Or better yet, some stuff doesn't even relate that could be edited out.
The friendship between the two main characters is strong, which is good since it drives the book. However, Parisa's character needs work. Her whole personailty is her anxiety disorder and the perfectionism that stems from it. As someone with an anxiety disorder, I totally understand how domineering it can be, but I feel like we never get to know her well outside of her panic attacks and overthinking. Even when we learn stuff like she likes a certain artist or snack it's brought back to her anixety somehow.
I may be over critical here. There is potentional in this book, it just needed another rewrite/trim down in my humble opinion.
I know a lot of people love this book, but it's a mixed bag for me. The story itself is well written, but the plot has way too much going on, the author really threw in everything but the kitchen sink. I understand with a book about a pandemic/lockdown, the author will wanna cover every aspect of life during it. However, there's gotta be a way to trim the fat so that there's less subplots and main ones don't get weighed down. Some stuff doesn't even hold that much impact to the overall story and felt thrown in just to show "This is how a pandemic affects this part of your life". Or better yet, some stuff doesn't even relate that could be edited out.
The friendship between the two main characters is strong, which is good since it drives the book. However, Parisa's character needs work. Her whole personailty is her anxiety disorder and the perfectionism that stems from it. As someone with an anxiety disorder, I totally understand how domineering it can be, but I feel like we never get to know her well outside of her panic attacks and overthinking. Even when we learn stuff like she likes a certain artist or snack it's brought back to her anixety somehow.
I may be over critical here. There is potentional in this book, it just needed another rewrite/trim down in my humble opinion.
May 17, 2022
Timely and topical in more ways than one, I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS is a heartfelt and hopeful exploration of friendship and love amid the most challenging of circumstances. This is the must-read pandemic story you've been waiting for!
October 17, 2022
10/16/2022 Full review tk at TheFrumiousConsortium.net.
10/17/2022 I don't remember the last time I read a book that was focused primarily on the work of friendship between two young women (Rumaan Alam's Rich And Pretty, maybe? Which I read in 2016 and did not love) without a mystery or epic storyline to pull focus from the relationship. And while I Miss You, I Hate This is allegedly about a fictional ademavirus that strikes in 2022, it's really about the COVID-19 pandemic, and how it derailed the end of American high school and its attendant rituals.
The reason for the fake pandemic is to emphasize its impact on teenagers, who are the most vulnerable target for the fictional virus. This lends a greater sense of urgency to the need for our main characters to avoid it, and adds a touch more drama to the narrative. Said main characters are Parisa Naficy, the over-achieving, anxiety-ridden daughter of Iranian immigrants, and Gabriela Gonzalez, the beautiful, artistic daughter of struggling lesbians. They've been best friends since the first day of high school, bonding over their relative status as outsiders, Parisa due to being an awkward nerd and Gabriela due to not having gone to the same middle school as everyone else.
As the book starts, the two have stolen a bunch of Parisa's parents' vodka and edibles, and are having their first experience with either in Parisa's empty hot tub-style bathtub. Unfortunately, Parisa's anxiety kicks in, leading her to think she's dying and causing her to scream for her parents. Gabriela gets sent home and they're both grounded... but then the pandemic kicks in and their temporary separation looks to become far more permanent. Will their bond be able to survive not only this forced estrangement but the stresses inherent to adolescent friendships?
This is a really well-drawn portrait of two young women in very different circumstances just doing their best with the challenges of the real world. Parisa is dead set on getting into Harvard, and is kinda put out by the return of her older sister Neda from Yale. Neda has always been the chill, unbothered one in their family, inadvertently making Parisa feel like even more of an emotional screw-up. Worse, Neda is now dating the boy that Parisa had a crush on all through high school.
Gabriela has her own family issues. Her parents have been lifelong best friends and sweethearts, who were kicked out by their families when their romance was discovered while they were still teenagers. It hasn't been easy for them since, but Gabriela is less bothered by her family's constant struggle to make ends meet than the fact that she's never met any of her other relatives.
Thank goodness for modern technology providing the girls a lifeline. Emails, video chats and texts (the last of which are included in the book) allow them to keep their friendship going even when they can't be together in person, as they cope with illness, romance, loss and the general discomfort of adjustment. This is probably the first, most honest account of how young people and their relationships were tested during the recent pandemic, even if it is a fictionalization. Told entirely from the girls' perspectives, it covers a pretty comprehensive range of responses, from Parisa's over-dramatic misery to Gabriela's more pragmatic concerns. Gabriela was my favorite of the two, from the very moment she accepted Parisa's anxiety as being worse for her best friend than for anyone else. It was very kind of her to constantly reassure Parisa that being rich didn't mean Parisa wasn't allowed to be unhappy -- even if, in my opinion, Parisa didn't extend anywhere near the same amount of support and grace to her friend.
That said, I did enjoy how irreligious the Naficys, and in particular Parisa the atheist, were. Their family is all about Persian culture, but their lukewarmth over religion was honestly refreshing to read. Not every immigrant family from a Muslim-majority country cares about religion or gives it an important place in their lives, and it's nice to see that acknowledged.
Smart, sensitive and timely, this novel might be too of-the-moment for certain readers, but is definitely a great read in the fine tradition of American coming-of-age novels. Recommended.
I Miss You, I Hate This by Sara Saedi was published October 11 2022 by Poppy Books and is available from all good booksellers, including Bookshop!
10/17/2022 I don't remember the last time I read a book that was focused primarily on the work of friendship between two young women (Rumaan Alam's Rich And Pretty, maybe? Which I read in 2016 and did not love) without a mystery or epic storyline to pull focus from the relationship. And while I Miss You, I Hate This is allegedly about a fictional ademavirus that strikes in 2022, it's really about the COVID-19 pandemic, and how it derailed the end of American high school and its attendant rituals.
The reason for the fake pandemic is to emphasize its impact on teenagers, who are the most vulnerable target for the fictional virus. This lends a greater sense of urgency to the need for our main characters to avoid it, and adds a touch more drama to the narrative. Said main characters are Parisa Naficy, the over-achieving, anxiety-ridden daughter of Iranian immigrants, and Gabriela Gonzalez, the beautiful, artistic daughter of struggling lesbians. They've been best friends since the first day of high school, bonding over their relative status as outsiders, Parisa due to being an awkward nerd and Gabriela due to not having gone to the same middle school as everyone else.
As the book starts, the two have stolen a bunch of Parisa's parents' vodka and edibles, and are having their first experience with either in Parisa's empty hot tub-style bathtub. Unfortunately, Parisa's anxiety kicks in, leading her to think she's dying and causing her to scream for her parents. Gabriela gets sent home and they're both grounded... but then the pandemic kicks in and their temporary separation looks to become far more permanent. Will their bond be able to survive not only this forced estrangement but the stresses inherent to adolescent friendships?
This is a really well-drawn portrait of two young women in very different circumstances just doing their best with the challenges of the real world. Parisa is dead set on getting into Harvard, and is kinda put out by the return of her older sister Neda from Yale. Neda has always been the chill, unbothered one in their family, inadvertently making Parisa feel like even more of an emotional screw-up. Worse, Neda is now dating the boy that Parisa had a crush on all through high school.
Gabriela has her own family issues. Her parents have been lifelong best friends and sweethearts, who were kicked out by their families when their romance was discovered while they were still teenagers. It hasn't been easy for them since, but Gabriela is less bothered by her family's constant struggle to make ends meet than the fact that she's never met any of her other relatives.
Thank goodness for modern technology providing the girls a lifeline. Emails, video chats and texts (the last of which are included in the book) allow them to keep their friendship going even when they can't be together in person, as they cope with illness, romance, loss and the general discomfort of adjustment. This is probably the first, most honest account of how young people and their relationships were tested during the recent pandemic, even if it is a fictionalization. Told entirely from the girls' perspectives, it covers a pretty comprehensive range of responses, from Parisa's over-dramatic misery to Gabriela's more pragmatic concerns. Gabriela was my favorite of the two, from the very moment she accepted Parisa's anxiety as being worse for her best friend than for anyone else. It was very kind of her to constantly reassure Parisa that being rich didn't mean Parisa wasn't allowed to be unhappy -- even if, in my opinion, Parisa didn't extend anywhere near the same amount of support and grace to her friend.
That said, I did enjoy how irreligious the Naficys, and in particular Parisa the atheist, were. Their family is all about Persian culture, but their lukewarmth over religion was honestly refreshing to read. Not every immigrant family from a Muslim-majority country cares about religion or gives it an important place in their lives, and it's nice to see that acknowledged.
Smart, sensitive and timely, this novel might be too of-the-moment for certain readers, but is definitely a great read in the fine tradition of American coming-of-age novels. Recommended.
I Miss You, I Hate This by Sara Saedi was published October 11 2022 by Poppy Books and is available from all good booksellers, including Bookshop!
July 1, 2023
An emotional exploration of loneliness, friendship and the risks we take to live told through the perspectives of two teen best friends who must survive a pandemic apart. With the praise-filled reviews, gorgeous cover and relateable, timely subject matter, I thought I was really going to enjoy this book. However, I quickly found myself despising both the main characters due to their lack of relatability (both because of Parisa's privelige and her and Gabriela's dry-ass proper-punctuation texts like???) as well as their annoying narrations and plots (examples: Parisa has an emotional affair with her sister's boyfriend and makes up stories about her parents to her online therapist and Gabriela thinks her boyfriend wearing his dead mother's sweatshirt is brave because it's a "women's sweatshirt" and that God should use "them/they" pronouns - the latter I agree with, for the record, but am disappointed that no one in the editing process thought to switch up the order of "them" and "they" in that sentence). These all might sound like minor, albeit cringe-y, moments in the story but combined with the two characters' lack of chemistry with one another (rather, it seems like they hate each other, as shown by Gabriela thinking that Parisa shouldn't have anxiety because she's rich and has "nothing to worry about" and Parisa thinking that Gabriela has "beauty privilege"), it all just became a bit much, even for me. Like, I get best friends can fight sometimes but it shouldn't make the reader (me) want them to just friendship break-up by the end of the book. Finally, while I was hooked to the story, I felt that this book was WAY too jam-packed with sub-plots and themes for a book that's about two best friends trying to survive a pandemic. While the ending is satisfying, it left me feeling hollowed out (and not in a good way). Overall, this was certainly an engaging read, but I don't think I'll be picking up this book again.
October 7, 2022
I was not mentally prepared for this book.
Immediately when I got through the first chapter, I fell in love with I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS. Stories about best friends growing up and going through it together are my weakness! I just don't think I was quite ready for a story about surviving the early days of a pandemic.
Technically, this is a fictional pandemic, but its consequences are very 2020 and very real. But despite that, the story of friendship and romance and shifting family dynamics while navigating global change was extremely well done. Exceptionally written, funny where it needed to be, deep as much as it could be. It can't imagine it was easy to write a story like this, but perhaps it was essential, and as a reader, it did feel important and, in many ways, necessary.
It's about so much more than being in lockdown or grief or fear. It's about anxiety and how to maintain relationships when you can't be with the people you love, and life changes and accepting that sometimes things aren't the way you imagined - and that doesn't make things all bad.
Highly recommend. I smiled and laughed more times than I expected despite the premise. Also, if you have a best friend, give them a hug if you can. You just never know.
Immediately when I got through the first chapter, I fell in love with I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS. Stories about best friends growing up and going through it together are my weakness! I just don't think I was quite ready for a story about surviving the early days of a pandemic.
Technically, this is a fictional pandemic, but its consequences are very 2020 and very real. But despite that, the story of friendship and romance and shifting family dynamics while navigating global change was extremely well done. Exceptionally written, funny where it needed to be, deep as much as it could be. It can't imagine it was easy to write a story like this, but perhaps it was essential, and as a reader, it did feel important and, in many ways, necessary.
It's about so much more than being in lockdown or grief or fear. It's about anxiety and how to maintain relationships when you can't be with the people you love, and life changes and accepting that sometimes things aren't the way you imagined - and that doesn't make things all bad.
Highly recommend. I smiled and laughed more times than I expected despite the premise. Also, if you have a best friend, give them a hug if you can. You just never know.
December 16, 2022
This hit harder than I expected (and a little too close to home)
December 18, 2022
Honestly, there were parts of this book that were so relatable I was taken aback by how much they resonated and that made for a really, really personal read.
"I Miss You, I Hate This" is about best friends Parisa and Gabriela as they navigate their senior year of high school amid a global pandemic. While the author admits in her acknowledgements she did write this book during the coronavirus pandemic, this was the one book where thinking about the coronavirus wasn't something that took me out of the story, but rather, only intensified the relatability. As someone who remembers exactly what it felt like to be frantically texting her best friends through those uncertain first waves of COVID (and, let's face it, every single other variant and wave of COVID), you can feel the tension and anxiety interwoven with the normal stressors of high school - college apps, relationships, and figuring out how to maintain friendships when attending colleges on entirely separate coasts.
Ultimately, however, the key parts of this book are about the friendship between Parisa and Gabriela, and how the best friendships can weather anything, even ill-timed emails, fights about boys, and anxiety attacks that can cut a sleepover short.
"I Miss You, I Hate This" is about best friends Parisa and Gabriela as they navigate their senior year of high school amid a global pandemic. While the author admits in her acknowledgements she did write this book during the coronavirus pandemic, this was the one book where thinking about the coronavirus wasn't something that took me out of the story, but rather, only intensified the relatability. As someone who remembers exactly what it felt like to be frantically texting her best friends through those uncertain first waves of COVID (and, let's face it, every single other variant and wave of COVID), you can feel the tension and anxiety interwoven with the normal stressors of high school - college apps, relationships, and figuring out how to maintain friendships when attending colleges on entirely separate coasts.
Ultimately, however, the key parts of this book are about the friendship between Parisa and Gabriela, and how the best friendships can weather anything, even ill-timed emails, fights about boys, and anxiety attacks that can cut a sleepover short.
July 8, 2025
4.5 Rating
Enjoyed this book more than I thought even though it was more geared towards young adults. Wasn’t sure what to feel about another pandemic book but I was surprised how much it moved me in different ways. Reading about their graduation, struggle to fit in or transition, growing mental illness, grieving a close friend while not being able to be with them, and a setting that took place in Northern Cal (references like De Anza college, etc). made me somehow connect to this book more than I expected. Easy and fun read overall.
Even though the theme of pandemic created challenges of loving each other as best friends or as lovers in this book, reality is that this world is full of unexpected circumstances and even unfairness that causes us to say “i miss you, i hate this” with each other today. 🥺❤️
Enjoyed this book more than I thought even though it was more geared towards young adults. Wasn’t sure what to feel about another pandemic book but I was surprised how much it moved me in different ways. Reading about their graduation, struggle to fit in or transition, growing mental illness, grieving a close friend while not being able to be with them, and a setting that took place in Northern Cal (references like De Anza college, etc). made me somehow connect to this book more than I expected. Easy and fun read overall.
Even though the theme of pandemic created challenges of loving each other as best friends or as lovers in this book, reality is that this world is full of unexpected circumstances and even unfairness that causes us to say “i miss you, i hate this” with each other today. 🥺❤️
November 14, 2024
DNF. I really wanted to like this book but it already has started with a poor first impression. One of the main characters is the typical “liberal high school girl who thinks she can solve all the world’s problems” which annoys the hell out of me. They would also constantly try to include diversity Easter eggs like they were trying to check off as many possible boxes as humanly possible. Of course none of these actually mattered to the story and often times distracted me from the actually important stuff. On top of that the pandemic aspect feels like they just copied and pasted every event from real life and then, for some reason, renamed the virus.
Overall not a bad book, but not an interesting or impressive one either.
Overall not a bad book, but not an interesting or impressive one either.
October 25, 2025
The librarian at the high school where I teach asked me to read this after a student expressed concerns about the “sex, drugs, and alcohol” in it. What a gift of a book I would never have picked up otherwise! Such a beautiful and heartbreaking picture of living through the pandemic as a teenager. I read it in one sitting and the hated that it was over so soon. We will definitely be keeping this book in the library.
February 24, 2025
Yay this was so cute.
I was definitely thinking of not finishing it for a bit, but I picked it back up and liked it, which was a win.
I liked that romance wasn’t the main vibe.
I liked the dual povs.
But I felt like some stuff probably wasn’t as developed as it should be?
Idk, but moral of the story was that it wasn’t the best, but it was cute and a chill read with nice morals.
Would buy this. 3.6 stars.
I was definitely thinking of not finishing it for a bit, but I picked it back up and liked it, which was a win.
I liked that romance wasn’t the main vibe.
I liked the dual povs.
But I felt like some stuff probably wasn’t as developed as it should be?
Idk, but moral of the story was that it wasn’t the best, but it was cute and a chill read with nice morals.
Would buy this. 3.6 stars.
February 6, 2024
ehhhhhhhh
i don’t rlly have much to say abt this book , took me a while to finish bc the plot was lowkey boring . but , i did the little reconnecting moment with her grandmother , and i did like her little valedictorian speech 🙂👍
i don’t rlly have much to say abt this book , took me a while to finish bc the plot was lowkey boring . but , i did the little reconnecting moment with her grandmother , and i did like her little valedictorian speech 🙂👍
March 1, 2023
I didn’t expect to like this so much!
October 17, 2023
round up to 4.5 stars.
April 19, 2024
Not my favorite. I love the idea of this book, but it just wasn't for me. Still a good read, but not what I was expecting....which is why it took me so long to finish lol.
May 31, 2023
omg okay so i figured out i hate reading pandemic books BUT the FRIENDSHIP omg i really love how the author put the words of how friendships are and it gives me excitement for me and best friend to look back on our years (freshman rn) when we're seniors and look at all the things we been through.
November 27, 2024
This book was written within the confines of the pandemic lockdown, and the authenticity of emotion really carries this book. I'll be recommending it to all my students. It's tender and heartbreaking all at once.
December 29, 2022
After several years of avoiding anything that could be considered pandemic lit, I finally made an exception for Saedi's newest YA title. Despite the fact that the pandemic within the novel is technically fictitious--unlike Covid-19, Adema-22 primarily affects the young--it is an all-too realistic portrayal of two high school seniors doing their best to cope and stay connected in an uncertain and unprecedented time. Parisa, an anxious but privileged Iranian-American girl, and headstrong Gabriela, daughter of two working class mothers, exchange a litany of texts and emails as each navigates her own personal pandemic experience, with a refrain of, "I miss you, I hate this." I'm a sucker for stories about female friendship, and this one is as cute and heartrending as they come.
June 28, 2022
A truly lovely portrait of a deep friendship during pandemic times. Gabriela and Parisa always felt their friendship was unbreakable, but unprecedented times cause them to face uncomfortable truths about their friendships, their families, and themselves.
This story is told through alternating viewpoints and Saedi pulls this off particularly well, giving Gabriela and Parisa really distinct, genuine, and compelling voices. Though other love interests come into play, the primary love story here is the friendship between the two young women.
Mental health is also addressed here in a very realistic way. As someone who personally grapples with anxiety, I found Parisa's struggles very relatable and realistic.
This is the first YA fiction book I've read that discussed the disruption, isolation, and loss that teenagers faced over the pandemic and it really did it a great job with it.
This story is told through alternating viewpoints and Saedi pulls this off particularly well, giving Gabriela and Parisa really distinct, genuine, and compelling voices. Though other love interests come into play, the primary love story here is the friendship between the two young women.
Mental health is also addressed here in a very realistic way. As someone who personally grapples with anxiety, I found Parisa's struggles very relatable and realistic.
This is the first YA fiction book I've read that discussed the disruption, isolation, and loss that teenagers faced over the pandemic and it really did it a great job with it.
June 11, 2024
good central message, but you can tell that this book is trying very hard to be relatable and progressive (which i can appreciate, but still), and that made it cringy at times
January 2, 2025
I'm giving this book a solid 3.5 stars! While some parts felt a bit slow, I still found it enjoyable overall. The ending really tugged at my heartstrings, especially what happened to Andrew—so sad! 😢 But I loved how the main characters managed to find their way back to each other. I'll really miss diving into their journey. What an adventure it’s been!
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Sunday, October 13, 2024 at 6:48 PM
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Sunday, October 13, 2024 at 6:48 PM
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 3, 2023
I didn’t love this book but I did finish it and I even tested up around the end of the book. There were some parts that gave me a small ick and also COVID books are just a slight ick to me in general but this one was bearable
October 15, 2022
A heartbreakingly accurate parallel to many of our children’s experiences during the pandemic lockdowns.
I Miss You, I Hate This, the title of this contemporary young adult novel by Sara Saedi, is also the recurring sign-off between the two main characters as they message throughout the length of the pandemic. The two girls are delightful together as the story opens; their text exchanges are often laugh-out-loud funny. However, as the lockdown and isolation wear on, their friendship begins to suffer.
The characters in the book present a wide variety of cultures, lifestyles, and family configurations, and most readers will find something similar to their situation somewhere in the story. The author puts names and faces to the characters experiencing the many different kinds of collateral effects the pandemic brought to the table, making them real. For example, I could feel the worry of Gabriela’s family, who could not make a living and pay their apartment rent when their catering business could no longer operate.I enjoyed the secondary storyline about Gabriela’s extended family. What a heartbreaker for her moms to be estranged from their families all those years because of who they loved.
Parisa’s anxiety disorder is really brought home and made real. As one of the book’s points of view, her feelings, thoughts, and fears are laid bare, and readers facing similar struggles will easily relate. The same can be said for her crush on her older sister’s boyfriend and how she handles her feelings and actions.It was hard not to cry during certain parts of this tough yet ultimately hopeful story. The feelings and fears in the book accurately mirror what many of our students and children have been going through during the Covid pandemic and subsequent lockdowns and remote schooling. Everyone was hurting, and many are still struggling today.
I recommend I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS to readers of contemporary young adult fiction, especially those interested in a story that parallels the experiences of many current and recently graduated high school students.I voluntarily reviewed this after receiving an Advanced Review Copy from the author or publisher through NetGalley and TBR and Beyond Book Tours.
January 2, 2023
I was skeptical that a book with the pandemic as its plot wouldn't feel a bit contrived and like it was capitalizing on the pandemic. I was pleasantly surprised that I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS was so much more than just a book about the pandemic.
Parisa and Gabriela are best friends from two very different worlds. Parisa grew up with strict Iranian parents and had a privileged financial life. Gabriela grew up with two moms in an apartment and was always worried about money. Despite their different upbringings, the girls were inseparable until the pandemic forced them to be.
Even though the pandemic is a part of the story, it is not the main plotline. It's more of a catalyst for the other stories to develop. The story focuses on Gabriela and Parisa's friendship and follows them as they determine who they are beyond their friendship and what they want from life. As I read this story, I found myself tearing up a few times, which proves how deeply connected I felt to the characters. Both Gabriela and Parisa were likable and relatable and as a reader you wanted to see them move on from the pandemic and thrive.
The story is told from both Gabriela and Parisa's perspectives which lets the reader understand each character more in-depth. The use of text messages, emails and video calls gives an additional peek into the girls friendship.
There are quite a few sub-plots as well that were just as compelling as the main story line. And each minor character and story added to the overall growth and development of Parisa and Gabriela.
I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS is a realistic portrayal of what life was like for high school seniors during the early months of the pandemic. However, don't just classify it as a pandemic story. This is a story of friendship that is worth a read.
** This review first appeared on YA Book and can be found here https://www.yabookscentral.com/i-miss... *
Parisa and Gabriela are best friends from two very different worlds. Parisa grew up with strict Iranian parents and had a privileged financial life. Gabriela grew up with two moms in an apartment and was always worried about money. Despite their different upbringings, the girls were inseparable until the pandemic forced them to be.
Even though the pandemic is a part of the story, it is not the main plotline. It's more of a catalyst for the other stories to develop. The story focuses on Gabriela and Parisa's friendship and follows them as they determine who they are beyond their friendship and what they want from life. As I read this story, I found myself tearing up a few times, which proves how deeply connected I felt to the characters. Both Gabriela and Parisa were likable and relatable and as a reader you wanted to see them move on from the pandemic and thrive.
The story is told from both Gabriela and Parisa's perspectives which lets the reader understand each character more in-depth. The use of text messages, emails and video calls gives an additional peek into the girls friendship.
There are quite a few sub-plots as well that were just as compelling as the main story line. And each minor character and story added to the overall growth and development of Parisa and Gabriela.
I MISS YOU, I HATE THIS is a realistic portrayal of what life was like for high school seniors during the early months of the pandemic. However, don't just classify it as a pandemic story. This is a story of friendship that is worth a read.
** This review first appeared on YA Book and can be found here https://www.yabookscentral.com/i-miss... *
August 22, 2023
I almost gave three stars to this book but after cooling down a bit, I changed my mind. It wasn't the author's fault that I walked into this book expecting way more queer—ness (since this book was in LGBT category and all but yeah, I know, the trick was on me) than it actually had. Damn it!
Reading "I Miss You, I Hate This" has felt like chewing on a mouthful of silica gel beads (NEVER DO THAT)—it kept slipping around my mouth and no matter how annoyed I felt (hear me out, I loved Garbiela's moms A TON but I had no idea they'd be the only queer people in the story) I couldn't put it down.
"I Miss You, I Hate This" is about friendship, horrors of the pandemic, first love and loss. When two besties, Parisa and Gabriela, find themselves on different sides of the screen, in a lockdown, their lives begin to spin out of control. It puts their friendship to the test as well as allows both girls to discover their true self beyond their inseparable friendship.
Parisa has an anxiety disorder and reading her chapters (yeah, this book is written from two points of view) has raised my blood pressure a notch or two. It's been nothing like reading Gabriela's chapters, and I love the contrast between these two very much.
Rich, progressive, and edgy—this book almost gave me a heart attack quite a few times, but I loved the family drama, the friendship drama, and the love drama all mingled together in this little book. It was a solid four-star read for me, even though at times I wanted to throw this book out of the window.
A note I left to myself while reading this book: Will definitely recommend this book to my asexual friends!!!!
Full review is coming on my podcast this week—the link is in my profile😊👆🙃
Reading "I Miss You, I Hate This" has felt like chewing on a mouthful of silica gel beads (NEVER DO THAT)—it kept slipping around my mouth and no matter how annoyed I felt (hear me out, I loved Garbiela's moms A TON but I had no idea they'd be the only queer people in the story) I couldn't put it down.
"I Miss You, I Hate This" is about friendship, horrors of the pandemic, first love and loss. When two besties, Parisa and Gabriela, find themselves on different sides of the screen, in a lockdown, their lives begin to spin out of control. It puts their friendship to the test as well as allows both girls to discover their true self beyond their inseparable friendship.
Parisa has an anxiety disorder and reading her chapters (yeah, this book is written from two points of view) has raised my blood pressure a notch or two. It's been nothing like reading Gabriela's chapters, and I love the contrast between these two very much.
Rich, progressive, and edgy—this book almost gave me a heart attack quite a few times, but I loved the family drama, the friendship drama, and the love drama all mingled together in this little book. It was a solid four-star read for me, even though at times I wanted to throw this book out of the window.
A note I left to myself while reading this book: Will definitely recommend this book to my asexual friends!!!!
Full review is coming on my podcast this week—the link is in my profile😊👆🙃
October 13, 2022
When best friends Parisa and Gabriela decide to try alcohol and pot, it doesn’t go as planned. Parisa, who suffers from anxiety, has a massive anxiety attack and yells for her parents. The two get promptly punished and separated. And then a pandemic hits, and they are once again separated. Can their friendship withstand not seeing each other? And what about their lives? This is their senior year of high school, and it’s spent from inside their homes.
If I had one issue with the book, it was that Parisa treated her dad like crap, which doesn’t resolve. Of course, teens don’t always appreciate their parents until they’re older, but it would have been nice to see that behavior addressed other than Parisa knowing she treats him like crap but doing nothing about it.
As someone who’s suffered from anxiety for a long time, I feel Saedi wrote Parisa’s anxiety well. It’s relatable, and it’s true to life. I loved how Gabriela supported her, even when it didn’t make sense, even when Parisa didn’t want to admit that she was suffering from anxiety. I found Gabriela more relatable. While their friendship with Wes and Alexander played a significant part in the book, they weren’t in depth, which helps keep the best friends at the forefront of the story.
This is a cute story, with text messages weaved throughout to enhance the story. I liked the alternating perspectives as well. Thank you, Little Brown Books, for sending this over.
If I had one issue with the book, it was that Parisa treated her dad like crap, which doesn’t resolve. Of course, teens don’t always appreciate their parents until they’re older, but it would have been nice to see that behavior addressed other than Parisa knowing she treats him like crap but doing nothing about it.
As someone who’s suffered from anxiety for a long time, I feel Saedi wrote Parisa’s anxiety well. It’s relatable, and it’s true to life. I loved how Gabriela supported her, even when it didn’t make sense, even when Parisa didn’t want to admit that she was suffering from anxiety. I found Gabriela more relatable. While their friendship with Wes and Alexander played a significant part in the book, they weren’t in depth, which helps keep the best friends at the forefront of the story.
This is a cute story, with text messages weaved throughout to enhance the story. I liked the alternating perspectives as well. Thank you, Little Brown Books, for sending this over.
January 29, 2024
3.5 stars really.
The aspect of this book that was strongest was the characterization. Both point of view characters have very distinct voices, perhaps even the most distinct from each other I’ve ever read in a book with 2 perspectives. The 2 main characters’ personalities are written so well, and you can see why they’re friends but they’re also very different, even in just their narrative voice. Even if you put the book down in the middle of a chapter and then pick it back up, you can tell from one sentence anywhere in the chapter whose pov you’re reading. And there are other relationships between characters that are done really well.
Unfortunately what didn’t work as well for me was the Covid-not-Covid stuff. This is basically a story of the beginning of the pandemic, but it’s not Covid, it’s a virus with different symptoms, taking the US by storm at a different time of year, and the people most vulnerable are teenagers. We weren’t given any reason as to why teenagers are the age group ending up in the hospital from the virus most often, and it doesn’t make any sense. So the fact that this is a plot point that comes up multiple times really took me out of the story. We do have 2 major characters in this book end up in the ICU from Covid-not-Covid, but they still could have even if the story were literally about Covid. So that all felt really arbitrary.
The aspect of this book that was strongest was the characterization. Both point of view characters have very distinct voices, perhaps even the most distinct from each other I’ve ever read in a book with 2 perspectives. The 2 main characters’ personalities are written so well, and you can see why they’re friends but they’re also very different, even in just their narrative voice. Even if you put the book down in the middle of a chapter and then pick it back up, you can tell from one sentence anywhere in the chapter whose pov you’re reading. And there are other relationships between characters that are done really well.
Unfortunately what didn’t work as well for me was the Covid-not-Covid stuff. This is basically a story of the beginning of the pandemic, but it’s not Covid, it’s a virus with different symptoms, taking the US by storm at a different time of year, and the people most vulnerable are teenagers. We weren’t given any reason as to why teenagers are the age group ending up in the hospital from the virus most often, and it doesn’t make any sense. So the fact that this is a plot point that comes up multiple times really took me out of the story. We do have 2 major characters in this book end up in the ICU from Covid-not-Covid, but they still could have even if the story were literally about Covid. So that all felt really arbitrary.
June 1, 2024
A very real contemporary book that hit really close to home for me and most likely many others who survived the Covid-19 pandemic! I wish the virus in this book was explained a bit more considering that it primarily affected the youth, but I was surprised I didn’t get bored reading this! I really liked the different cultural identities in both characters and especially how Parisa’s family origins went in-depth. I also enjoyed reading the differences in our MCs including wealth, morals, and personalities! Gabriela and Parisa’s friendship was heartwarming but I found their fights to be very immature and cheesy. The pacing also flopped around a little with big time jumps to big scenes. Same goes for that whole crazy situation with Parisa and Gibs. (1. I can’t remember if that was his name oops and 2. THAT SITUATION WAS ACTUALLY INSANE THEY WERE BOTH 100% AT FAULT PARISA LOST SO MUCH RESPECT FROM ME!!!) I really wish this book had more mature writing, ESPECIALLY when dealing with such serious topics like death and mental health. Andrew’s death was very sad, but could have been expanded on WAY MORE and really touched the reader emotionally through good writing and storytelling. I also WISHHHH the ending was different. Gabriela and Parisa meeting up again was fine, but I really wish the author tied in some sort of motivating/life message that readers could really take out of this! Regardless, good late night read.
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