After Tonight, Everything Will Be Different

by Adam Gnade

Falling somewhere between Trainspotting and Like Water for Chocolate, Adam Gnade’s self-described “food novel” frames each chapter around a meal, and from there moves wild in all directions. After Tonight, Everything Will Be Different takes place in San Diego taco shops and rundown beach apartments, on the amusement park boardwalk at 3am and in cars bound for Tijuana and drunken glory. Like Proust’s baroque autobiographical fantasies, this is a book rich with details and life. Gnade’s youthful characters sink to hard drugs and deep depression as they navigate life at the end of the last century. They celebrate and they battle with their demons and throughout it all they eat. This is not a food snob’s novel. Instead Gnade writes about the pain and joy of life and the ways that common, everyday food is there with us at each step. This is a book of deli sub sandwiches, endless burritos, eggplant parmesan, the magnificence of good sourdough bread, of box brownies and Nacho Cheese Doritos, rolled tacos and the perfect tortilla. After Tonight, Everything Will Be Different is a raging, ecstatic, troubled book that shows a world of food and a world of life, each inextricable from the other.

Genres: Fiction, Food, Book Club, Coming Of Age, Short Stories, Literary Fiction, Novels

208 pages, Paperback

First published January 5, 2022

About the author

Adam Gnade’s (guh nah dee) work is released as a series of books and "talking songs" that share characters and themes; the fiction writing continuing plot-lines left open by the self-described “talking songs” in an attempt to compile a vast, detailed, interconnected, personal history of contemporary American life. His books and "talking records" are released by Bread & Roses Press and Three One G.

Reviews

[Michael · Rating 5 out of 5]

Like if Bruce Springsteen hosted Diners, Drive Ins, and Dives but the show was based around important existential food moments with a side order of contemplative longing. I loved every second of it. 5 out of 5 burritos.

[John Dishwasher John Dishwasher · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novella affirms human life in an unusual way. Gnade clashes the worst of life against the best of it, showing us that no matter how bad things get, always there is still good to be found, sometimes even in the very same experience. This argument in the book is primarily subtextual, and the medium he uses to further it is food. We watch a scene that contemplates flaws balanced with the perfection of a dish, a scene full of pain balanced by the comforts of a meal, a scene of death balanced by the life that continues through a waiting breakfast, scenes of ugliness and complexity and hate balanced simultaneously by beauty and simplicity and love. And all through food. His scenes resonate with these counterpoints as if they hover between yin and yang, as if the dark depends upon the light. Gnade shows us we have a choice in life which direction to point our attention, and with his lavish adorations of the chile relleno burrito or an eggplant parmesan, reminds us that no matter how bad it gets we still can invite the best of human life to outshine the worst.

The book feels like a fictionalized food memoir woven into a road story, beatnik-style friendships included. The narrative is impressionistic in construction but lucid in its prose. The flow from vignette to vignette is deceptively breezy and fun, so much so that Gnade’s optimistic argument and conclusion might easily be missed. Also I found interesting the somewhat estranged protagonist, who felt to me as much a focal point as a character.

Because of this book, today I sought out and ate my first chile relleno burrito at my local Southern California taco shop. And, yes indeed, for a few minutes that burrito turned all the darkness in the world into light.

[talia ♡ · Rating 5 out of 5]

literally just...

review to come (def by tomorrow) because this one's going to be very personal and special and i need to get my thoughts in order.

5 stars or infinity

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it is finally time to read this one since i am home (!!!! <3) for another two weeks and i want to soak in as much san diego-ness as i can before i have to fly back to school where it is currently 32 degrees (THIRTY TWO) and snowing :|

pray 4 me. i was raised on the beach, i wasn't built for that.

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EXCITED FOR THIS BOOK BECAUSE I GO HOME FOR BREAK TOMORROW!!! SAN DIEGO MY BELOVED!

the east coast is really cool for a lot of things but they wouldn't know a good burrito if it smacked them in the face. also, i have learned that i am certainly NOT a cold weather person.

cold back home means 72 degrees, a hoodie, and jorts (as opposed to t shirt and jorts).

i am so fucking emotional and excited i could cry. i miss my family, i miss my beautiful coast, actually good avocados, and my gorgeous beaches. california, i love you more than blink 182 does.

🎵and i miss you, i'm going back home to the west coast...🎶

[Daniel · Rating 5 out of 5]

My dudes.
This book is delicious.

The chapters are each named after and themed around happenings involving specific meals, most of which are linked to and around San Diego.

For years I wanted to make carne asada tacos at home, and finally made it last night, following an “authentic San Diego carne asada” recipe. (I failed a little—it worked, but I had no illusion I was going to make it half as good as, say, Camacho’s in the Valley, but scratched the itch thanks to Lauren’s homemade tortillas, homemade salsa de aguacate, salsa fresca, refried beans, etc.) But, after that tangent, back to how this whole effing book manages to feel like a visit to the San Diego of my teens and 20s, long tangents and all. And it got weird. Good weird. Often a perfect (to me) read, but then sometimes a little frenetic in ways that let my fervor calm down or lose track, before impressing me again with a sideswipe of things that get very for-real, and lived-through. This hits close to home.

So the story itself will appeal at least objectively to people who haven’t grown up in San Diego—but for those of us who have, your impressions of your San Diegan-ness could be flipped up to reveal its uniqueness and universal relatability.

(Thanks to Verbatim Books for the recommendation: "Read this one. Or that one. Read all of them. They're all good.")

[Andrea Reyes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Holy crap. The use of food to tell all of these wonderful, hard, sad, nostalgic and beautiful stories was phenomenal. The American Cheese, the Nacho Cheese Doritos and ALL the various burritos.

“Is there not glory enough in living the days given to us?”

[Bailey Surprenant · Rating 4 out of 5]

The premise of tying food or a meal to very specific memories within the authors early life is very intuitive and makes for a nice and easy to read book format.
Everything presentation wise is cool and fun! The cover and chapter collages are amazing and fit the vibe for every new meal and story.
The book kept my attention throughout and made me want to keep on living life through his eyes.
Although I enjoyed it, I really wish he went deeper into his thought process around theses memories, especially nearing the end where I came out of it wanting more from the book.
Contradicting, but some cases in books and movies, I like the aspect of being open and up to the reader or viewer to put together, but here instead of feeling intentionally open, it more felt missing

[Vaughn · Rating 5 out of 5]

left me with a little hole in my heart and i’m not sure if that hole will be filled with sadness or excitement toward our fucked up little world

[Aaron Martinez · Rating 2 out of 5]

i really wanted to like this book bc the concept of investigating food memories through the lens of personal experience and emotional valence is so interesting and a universally poetic experience; however, unfortunately i have read soccer in sun and shadow by eduardo galeano which i feel exemplifies thematic writing with focus. galeano’s book dissects nearly every aspect of soccer with poeticism and romantic flair, and left a lasting impact on me and how i like to consume episodic writing.

i feel that this book lags though in a couple ways. i feel that it detracts itself from the food itself and tying personal vignettes to food. food is just there, which is a bit misleading. gnade also often comes across as performative and corny in trying to sound punk-ey. i know some people inflate writing to create aesthetics or to ellicit a mood and i do feel like characters like cassidy translate well, but whenever the main voice or voice of adam comes out i just get kinda eye roll-ey and i literally don’t care. i also feel like some chapters finish on these superficial, vague, rupi kaur- type wavy literatura that would hit for a 14 year old but not for me.

[Elijah · Rating 2 out of 5]

Most of it reads like long drawn out tumbler posts. I didn't find the authors writing style particularly interesting or engaging.

I'm not sure what a reader is suppose to take away from this book as it's personal essays dont tell give much story or heart, and often thematically rest on banal trivialities like 'can you believe you and I are alive' and 'the world is shit but darn that's life folks, remember to hope.' Which mostly made me roll my eyes and give me that 'tumbler post' feeling.

Surprised how highly recommended this book came from so many sources. I found it bland and boring.

[Rachel Grennan · Rating 5 out of 5]

“life is a gift, and it’s also a curse. it’s a trap, a ripening piece of fruit with worms at the heart of it, a lovely sunset, a poisoned cup of wine offered by the one who loves you most, a feast you will carry with you and remember until you are old or until your memories begin to weather, fade, and sift away like dry sand.”

[kezhia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thoroughly enjoyed this book of vignettes, reminiscing on both sweet and bitter memories, all through the fascinating lens of food.

I especially loved how familiar it felt to hear about places in San Diego which I now hold dear, as someone who’s lived here for nearly 3 years. I hope to make as deep and longing of memories in this city as Adam Gnade, to look back on in the future.

[Harry Smith]

On some nights, nights when it is very quiet, and we feel as if no one is watching, we breathe life back into what we once had and sometimes those bones stand right up, walk around, and dance for just a bit.

[Jenny Song · Rating 4 out of 5]

angsty, angry, kinda sexy? kinda sad

there were certain passages that were well written that i liked a lot, others were questionable.

[Lennart · Rating 4 out of 5]

A really interesting book. Every chapter is titled with the name of a food and highlights a specific moment in time for the main character. Well written

[Audrey A · Rating 5 out of 5]

Probably a 4 star reading experience but 5 stars for being so genuine. A book about a guy who loves food and music and his friends so so much

[nathan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Indie sleaze is back. Bring back risograph and diy culture. The days of outdoor dirty plastic dining tables and cheap summer breezes are alive and well in Southern California.

Little literature comes out of San Diego. But here, we get a good sense of what it's like. The grit. The breeze. Slow night drive cruises.

With every dish a chapter begins with, we delve deeper into who our narrator is. So much of food is best experienced with the company we have, but also with the memories that spring forward. And when those memories spring forward, a lot of humanity is carried over. And it's here Gnade makes us realize how much we actually have in common. When the tough gets going, what does one do? How does one push through it all?

I wish my teen years had this. I would've gone a lot further than I have now, but I respect myself a lot more for what I have been through. Because you do what you have to do in the way that you have to do it.

[Sabrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

like a hug on a rainy nyc saturday :) what a wonderful feeling to be homesick on the subway and see names of places you grew up in with all the romantic language about youth and looking forward that defines the time you’ve spent in a place. thank you!

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Eat joyously because to eat with a joyous heart is one of the greatest pleasures you will know.”

[Maggie Kotecki · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the beginning, and there are a lot of great quotes throughout.

[Rafya · Rating 3 out of 5]

I spent the entirety of the time I was reading this book yearning for a trip to San Diego and a massive burrito. Food novel indeed!

[Zach Zoeller · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Food is the greatest drug of all time and a proper bandaid. It’s a hug when you need it, a way to forget your problems and blot out the noise in your head.”

I had the pleasure of watching Adam Gnade read from this book in both Kansas City, Missouri and Lawrence, Kansas on April 2nd of 2025. I knew nothing about him, but I recognized the cover from my old bookstore in Seattle and am always down to champion local talent (he lives on a farm in KS now, though he’s FROM San Diego). Adam’s reading was great; I bought the book and was excited to read it. But holy shit, man. Hoooly shit. It’s better than I’d have ever guessed. It’s one of my favorite books ever. It’s an absolute feast.

I think the concept is just beautiful. How Adam manages to tie such vivid, melancholic memory to each plate of food is nothing short of wizardry. It made me think a lot about food as catharsis (see the above quote) and how so many of my most cherished memories too center around a warm, delicious meal. The whole book left me feeling excited and inspired and hungry as fuck! Today, knowing I’d finish the book in the evening, I drove an hour to Topeka to get lunch with my best friend. He’d just moved there a week ago and I was excited to show him my favorite spot, Taco Villa. It’s Americanized slop, deep-fried and diluted of spice, but my family would always eat there when we drove up to visit my grandparents. It was a sacred place for us and it still is to me. I made my friend order the “Thing”, kind of a tostada, but really just meat and cheese and tortilla. I ordered two, plus two tacos. We chowed down and we talked & talked and then I took him to my grandma and I’s favorite trail to walk off the calories. It was a beautiful day that existed because of this book and what it reminded me about food and about love.

Thank you, Adam, for writing this. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[melody · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book was made for me and genuinely everything- it feels like a memoir, compiled of short chapters relating the protagonist's life to a memory with food. we learn about how growing up poor, american cheese tacos with jam were a favorite food of the protagonist and there's this great paragraph about how even if a 'favorite' food isn't accepted by popular taste, it is still someone's favorite thing and it is loved, and because of that, it has value. there is no concrete plot and characters come in and out, like tyler (there's a sweet story where the protagonist often eats good food with tyler in an effort to cheer him up and it's revealed that tyler doesn't really care for food but would do it to be a good friend).

the writing is evocative and captured a lot of emotions and memories that reminded me of my childhood/adolescence. i waited for 4+ months for this because the library's 1 copy was lost but i am so glad i got this- and now i'm cursed because a lot of this author's books are only available through ordering online!!

buzzwordathon challenge for 2026!! title contains before or after :)

[Andrw Fx · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just finished this latest book from @adamgnade

A lifelong culinary journey down the South Western Pacific coast into Tijuana over to late 90s NYC and back. The furthest thing from another snobby food book. Adam walks us through a barrage of feelings: sad, anxious, boisterous, indifferent, and most importantly, the sensation of absolutely nothing, the fading oblivion of childhood. Observations of love and friendship and suffering told through greasy tacos, burritos, NY pizza, copious amounts of refried beans and cheese, dusty tortillas, grilled sour dough slices, fresh caught fish, yellow American singles, perfectly crafted tomato sandwiches, and dine-n-dash egg plant parm. The finest and richest of foods and the things a child makes when there's nothing in the house but condiments and bread.

This book is punk af, greasy af, emotionally charged, poignant. It has crystal meth and it's wholesome: an absolute rarity! Brilliant. Get yrself a copy!

[delaney · Rating 5 out of 5]

fucking awesome is every way. i love my girlfriend and i love being alive with her and as much as i dont like it sometimes i do truly love food. it keeps me going like no other, and even though it makes me feel like shit sometimes and i have a history of not eating it or throwing it up on purpose, i love it. i love my girlfriend, i love food, i love new york, and i love this book. i gotta go have some sourdough and butter asap.

[Kian Li · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Sometimes we open it up and pick through the old, long bones, and maybe we find something we remember. On some nights, nights when it is very quiet, and we feel as if no one is watching, we breathe life back into what we once had and sometimes those bones stand right up, walk around, and dance for just a bit.”

[Kate Carleton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quick read. Makes me want to “keep that hoping machine running”.

[Cassi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Always enjoy a food novel

[D · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed the concept a lot and it was easy to read in a couple sittings. Sometimes I was just like girl you didn’t have to say that we know. Basically every chapter ends with “I hate myself” “I don’t really want to be alive” so yea

[Erika · Rating 2 out of 5]

I chewed up all his tuna melts, eggplant parms and burritos, various and then I threw it all up cuz this was not good.

[Heidi]

I don’t know how to rate this. Started out so good, 5 stars, but kinda fizzled out midway through.