In today’s modern world, we are largely isolated from the kind of savagery our ancestors faced on a daily basis. Although violence was as natural to our evolutionary development as sex and food, it has become foreign to most of at once demonized and glamorized, but almost always deeply misunderstood. Our hard-earned and hard-wired instincts—our evolved and trained ability to survive and overcome violent encounters—have been compromised. Yet, as even a cursory look at news headlines or a police blotter will reveal, the threat of violent crime is ever-present, and those we’ve entrusted to protect us cannot always be relied upon. The Gift of Violence tells the story of this vulnerability and provides the average person with all the knowledge they need to reduce the likelihood of becoming a victim of violence and to increase their chances of surviving a violent encounter. Based both on the author’s decades of experience teaching everyday people how to defend themselves and on a rational approach to the scientific data, The Gift of Violence offers clear, easy-to-remember lessons for people of all ages and abilities. It is designed to empower those who’ve been affected by violence or are concerned that they or their loved ones could be—in short, it was written to help good people become more dangerous to bad people. Every reader will be armed with the necessary knowledge to harness the power of violence for him- or herself—and, in the process, to be not just smarter and stronger but also safer.
Excellent book on martial arts, training, urban violence, how it happens, how to prepare for it and how to protect oneself from it.
I particularly liked the logical and analytical approach that the author took in approaching this topic, it draws on a lot of studies and population data to paint a very clear and conceret picture of how violence happens, by whom, where and how. In addition to that, the book offers clear practical advice on how to think about this whole topic and the role of martial arts in it.
I'm looking forward to the next book in this series of books by Matt Thornton, hopefully in the very near future.
The Gift of Violence: Practical Knowledge for Surviving and Thriving in a Dangerous World by Matt Thornton was a disappointing verbose cacophony of statistical diarrhea.
The title “The Gift of Violence” is in the vein of de Becker’s The Gift of Fear which 25 years after first being published remains a seminal work. Thornton’s The Gift of Violence will disappear into a well of obscurity and irrelevance.
Thornton goes on-and-on ad nauseam with statistics, percentages, and numbers that most will find irrelevant because they personally fall outside the parameters of those statistics. And those who are victimized by crime understand that statistics become an irrelevant fact when one is the statistic.
Thornton gratuitously throws out many names of those who provided foundational research such as de Becker, Hare, Kahneman, Dawkins, Pinker, and others. Thornton regurgitates information from the research of others without adding any additional insight.
While there is some practical information provided it takes a lot of wadding through endless statistical drivel to get to and again no additional insights are provided. It is also information that is commonly provided from a variety of sources.
I’m sure Thornton is a very accomplished and knowledgeable martial artist. It is unfortunate the Gift of Violence missed the mark.
A logical and unsentimental examination of violence in modern society—who commits it, who is victimized by it, and how one can avoid or be prepared for encountering it. Thornton notes that modern industrialized societies are substantially safer and less violent per capita than pre-modern ones. Because the business of violence in developed nations has been outsourced to professionals though (law enforcement, the military, etc), many people are left with a distorted view of the realities of violence and how best to mitigate it.
Thornton is a renowned Brazilian Jiu Jitsu instructor, and he is at his best in the book when taking to task the “woo-woo” disciplines in the broader martial arts world. His critiques of traditional, guru-lead schools (think chopping bricks, death touches, and secret punches) are clinical and savage.
Whether one is interested in a positivist analysis of criminal behavior, frameworks for assessing threats in life, or advice for pursuing functional martial arts, Thornton’s book is an exceedingly practical guide.
This book is full of practical advice, relevant scientific data, and well thought-out arguments. I did not expect to find reflections on epistemology in this book, and was pleasantly surprised that Matt identified one’s personal epistemology as a line of defense against violence. I think that it is one of the most important lines of defense.
One idea from this book that I found to be particularly compelling is the idea that it will always become painfully clear through repeated experimentation what the reality is and what does and does not work. I loved the comparison of sparring to the scientific method or philosophical debate. These are all things that you cannot fake (at least not for long) and are, in essence, conversations. Conversations are a great epistemological methodology- they are how you get to the truth.
In the interest of continuing the conversation, there are two major things that weren’t really addressed in this book that I would’ve liked to have seen explored (maybe Matt can get into these if he writes a second book):
1. Matt doesn’t distinguish between sociopaths and psychopaths. While neither are actual medical diagnoses, my understanding of the colloquial distinction between the two is that sociopaths are more “made” by nurture/life experiences and psychopaths are more “born” with low empathy due to inborn brain differences.There is a neuroscience element to this; you can see physical brain differences in both groups compared to the general population. Matt’s book mostly covers how to deal with sociopaths, who are generally the people who commit street crimes and end up in prison. While it’s good to know how to defend yourself against those kinds of people, In my opinion, psychopaths are actually more dangerous as they are harder to spot and are often in positions of power. They are also harder to “fix,” because their inherent capacity for empathy is lower. Psychopaths are less likely to go straight to using brute force and are more likely to use deception, manipulation and coercion to do their evil deeds. We need to adjust our strategies when we are dealing with a psychopath vs. a sociopath. I would recommend the documentary “I Am Fishhead” to Matt or anyone else who wants to get into this topic.
2. While Matt tells us to fight back, he doesn’t really get into what happens to people who do fight back. The fact is that they are often punished; especially women. Many women who are in prison for violent crimes are there because they fought back against their abusers, and they often receive longer sentences than men for crimes like murder. It’s less socially acceptable for a woman to use violence in self-defense or when snapping after years of abuse than it is for a man to be an aggressor (you might not think this is the case but in practice it is shown to be true time and time again). I would’ve liked to have seen an explanation of what reactive abuse is and how it is different from an ongoing pattern of interpersonal violence. More on the psychological and practical dynamics of domestic violence (and/or any other long-term exploitation of a power imbalance/pattern of abusive behavior) would’ve been good in this book. Understanding how those kinds of relationships function is key to escaping them or helping someone else escape. It’s key to recognizing who is the victim and who is the abuser using DARVO tactics to play the victim. Also, It’s important to have an understanding of what is legal when it comes to use of force, and an understanding of what the consequences could be (legally or otherwise) if you injure or kill someone in any number of potential situations. I would’ve liked to have seen more of an emphasis on the importance of these things, and more information about them.
How to manage your life, which as part of our evolutionary heritage, includes violence.
Neither Matt Thornton nor this book fit comfortably into any category. The supposed subject of this book is Brazilian jujitsu. BJJ. It is within the genre of mixed martial arts – anything goes hand-to-hand combat.
But Thornton references, and the book is recommended by some of the brightest philosophers of our age. In his introduction he credits polymath Michael Shermer of Caltech (Secrets of Mental Math: The Mathemagician's Guide to Lightning Calculation and Amazing Math Tricks, cross-country bicycling champion) for encouraging him to write the book. He offers an incredibly rich bibliography. Among the books most cited is Steven Pinker's [[ASIN:B005HHSYMW The Better Angels of our Nature]]. He introduces each chapter with a quote from the classics, always appropriate, often one that is not familiar. Peter Boghossian wrote the afterword.
Like Sun Tsu's "The Art Of War," Machiavelli's "The Prince" and Clausewitz' "On War," this is the book about the philosophy of managing violence more than the art of being violent. It is rich with examples of emerging successfully from interpersonal confrontations without employing the fighting skills he has spent a lifetime developing.
Like Joe Rogan, Thornton forces the reader to re-examine his preconceptions about people who devote their lives to martial arts. The son of a policeman, without a college education, he has done a very thorough job of educating himself. While nowhere in the book does the put down head-in-the-clouds academics, he does often put down the unrealistic notions of pacifists, those who would defund the police and so on. His central message is that violence is real. When all else fails, violence remains the only way to control others who employ violence against you and your family.
Every person, he says, should have a line in the sand. They have a gun and want your wallet? Take it, please. They have a knife and want your car? Here are the keys. They want to force your wife into a car to take her someplace else? No way. I will die first. The purpose of the BJJ training Thornton offers in his Straight Blast Gyms is to maximize your odds of surviving such an encounter.
Thornton is an anomaly in other ways. At 6'7" he towers over every other martial artist who appears in the photographs in the book. He repeatedly makes the point that size, age and gender should not discourage people from learning to defend themselves.
There are lengthy discussions of the nature of the threats we are likely to face and how to be prepared to meet them and how to avoid them. The two acronyms he recommends that the reader internalize: MIND: maturity, intellect, noticing and distance, deterrence and determination and ART (appropriate response training) have to do with avoiding conflict.
He advises the reader to be aware of where danger comes from, and where it does not. Samples: more from family and acquaintances than strangers. More from handguns than long weapons – and bare hands more than long guns or shotguns. Many times more from recognized bad neighborhoods than good ones. Also – and here he walks close to the edge – certain ethnic groups. He prudently hews close to government statistics. His valuable footnotes take up 10% of the book.
Thornton is the father of a family of five. He offers this advice, which I immediately shared with my wife for us to pass on to our young children: "Here are five specific lessons that you can also pass on directly to your kids. These are the boundaries that your children should know shouldn't be crossed:
"1. I am the boss of my body! If I don't like something or get the "uh-oh" feeling, I will stand up for myself! I don't need to be polite if I am scared or uncomfortable. "2. Everyone's bathing suit areas are private. If someone is touching me there or asks or wants to touch me there, I will tell my parents. "3. Grownups don't ask kids for help. Not even to find a lost puppy. And they never ask kids to go somewhere with them. If this happens, I will tell my parents. "4. I don't keep secrets from my parents. Especially if another adult has asked me to or made me feel scared, uneasy, or uncomfortable. "5. I will always check in first before going anywhere. If I get lost, I'll find a mommy with kids. Beyond this, be sure they know not only their full name and birth date but also your full name, address, and telephone numbers should they ever get lost."
Thornton's lengthy discourses about the shortcomings of the usual martial arts programs resonated with me. I stood up against my wife when our son pooh-poohed the benefits of capoeira and tae kwon do. They struck me as an expensive, time-consuming exercise in choreography. My motto has always been that if it doesn't make you sweat it isn't worth doing. Per Thornton, BJJ makes you sweat. An encounter is not over until one of the two combatants "taps out" to indicate that he is giving up. You are not competing for tikky marks on some evaluator's scoresheet. You are competing to win.
In expressing contempt for disciplines that fake it, Thornton describes a "deepity." It is something that sounds profound but is intellectually hollow. Many deepities contend that ritually practicing classic martial arts moves leads to mastery. "Nonsense!" contends Thornton, citing Clausewitz. "No campaign plan survives the first contact with the enemy." If you want to learn how to do it, there is no substitute for doing it.
Thornton goes into the ultimate reason that somebody would want to learn martial arts. To survive – to live a long life. He then asks why a person, adopting that as an objective, would allow himself to be out of shape, to use alcohol and drugs, and to neglect his mental development. Throughout the book he repeats the observation that the threats that a person can overcome through prudent choices in who to marry, where to live, what to eat, and how to maintain one's physical condition vastly outweigh the threats of violence.
That has certainly been my experience. I can count on the fingers of one hand the times in my 80 years when I would have wished to know BJJ. I came out of them okay, and as Thornton often repeats, I might have gotten into trouble had I been overconfident about a little bit of knowledge. 60-year-old Thornton ran into a lot of bullies growing up. Though born earlier, I ran into many fewer. None of my six children got into fisticuffs. This is not a terribly violent world.
Put this one on your bookshelf under the title of self-defense, self-improvement or philosophy. Whichever you choose, it should be there one way or another.
At first glance, this title seems like another self-defense book, but the author provides a very thorough and detailed analysis about anti-social behavior. You do not need to know anything about martial arts to understand the concepts discussed in this book because the author makes everything easy to understand. The author also doesn't hold back or pull any punches when discussing issues related to misconceptions about violence, the self-defense industry or those from traditional martial arts with no live sparring. The only people who may give this book a bad review may be a kung-fu or aikido master.
Being a martial arts enthusiast, I expected the gift of violence to be very different from what it was. While it set up with the subject matter I assumed it would be, we took a left turn to societal problems with crime, fatherlesness, and a unique side of self defense.
The turn was a welcome one. Thornton provides a source for every fact he pulls and weaves them together in a way that makes the books conclusion payoff worth the entire read.
Even if you aren’t a fan of martial arts, you can get something from this book to change how you view the world.
Amazing all encompassing primer on the nature of violence and how to protect yourself in the modern world. Everyone should read this. Both for their own safety and confidence, as well as that of their family.
As I learned in the book, one of the main keys to avoiding violence is prevention and avoiding situations or people in your life who feel off. This and many more practical tips are engrained in you by the end of the book.
He has an awesome podcast episode with Sam Harris on the Making Sense Podcast ep316 if you want to get a feel for the author and his message before reading.
Great insight into the true nature of violent encounters and the reality of the training methods needed to deal with them. Anyone interested in self defense and/or combat sports, this is a must read.
thorough analysis of violence and it's flavours, always backed by statistics. it's very interesting that we need to be aware of people in our proximity rather than strangers.
This book started strong, but I found myself increasingly disagreeing with the author’s insistence that combat sports and “Aliveness” are what most people need. I say this as someone who trains Brazilian jiu-jitsu and sees real value in it. Still, I think there’s more to be said for other forms of training — including so-called “dead” practices like kata — than Thornton allows.
I first encountered Matt Thornton online almost twenty years ago. His writings and thoughts on the training process used to produce effective martial artists have been a great influence on me as a martial artist myself. Later, I discovered that his work expanded into epistemology(the study of knowledge) and it was largely through those writings that I found myself stepping into the larger intellectual community today.
That exploration of the intellectual life involves the discussion of the biological, sociological and cultural aspects tied to the subject of violence which is the core of this book. Though there are several chapters in this book that does speak on how to detect and how to train in a functional martial art, the bulk of it discusses the role violence plays in our everyday lives.
Multiple subjects are delved into at length. Why do people, especially young males, fight? What can we learn from how our mammalian cousins on the evolutionary tree as to how our evolved biology influences our behavior and relationship towards violence? Is pacifism always a morally good course of action or is violence a superior choice depending on the circumstances? Does the media report honestly and helpfully on crime rates and occurrences or are we sold a false and unhelpful narrative? Whom does a person truly need to pay attention to in order to be safe? How do we develop a healthy relationship to violence without fetishizing it or unhelpfully denying it as a part of our nature?
All of this, and more, is discussed within these pages, with reams of data and evidence to support his points. Very much worth a read. The only reason I didn’t give the book a full four out of five stars was because I wasn’t sure if descriptions regarding the martial arts training methodology would be easily consumable by the average reader who may read the book for an understanding of violence but who might not actually train in a martial art.
This book is a difficult read, and everyone should read it. It is not difficult in the usual sense - it’s not long, or technical, or obtuse, or difficult to understand. In fact, it is simple, straightforward, and logical. At times, however, it is difficult to accept. It will make you feel things about yourself that you don't want to admit are there. It may bring up things from your past that you don't like to think about. It is not a particularly violent book. There are a few descriptions and examples of graphic violence to make important points, but the point of the examples isn't to shock you or make you cringe or to tell you brave stories of heroism.
The audiobook is narrated by the author. Matt Thornton's speech has likely been honed by his decades of teaching martial arts so he has an excellent narrating voice and it is always a treat to listen to a book narrated by such an author because their meaning and passion is completely unfiltered.
The Gift of Violence cites many classic works of logic, psychology, and evolution, but one book not cited that it reminds me of most is On Aggression, by Kondrad Lorenz. While On Aggression is almost exclusively about the evolution of violence and aggression, TGoV is about rebuilding your relationship with violence. Does that mean making you a more violent and aggressive person? No, in fact the moral of the story is quite the opposite. In fact if you learn to embrace and come to terms with your inherently violent nature, you may end up leading a safer and less violent life than you currently do.
Great book. It successfully does what it sets out to do. Makes a convincing case for how to minimize your risks related to violence in life.
It spends quite a lot of time explaining and proving why most martial arts are bullshit — more than necessary for me (I was easily convinced). Anyone who actually practices one of these martial arts probably needs quite a bit of convincing though, so it’s justified in some sense.
A fascinating exploration of a fundamental topic of human life, history, and psychology that has aspects that are both often overlooked AND also exaggerated. The author brilliantly discusses the realities of violence in a somewhat clinical analysis that de-glamorizes and also makes more extraordinary the relative safety and naivety of modern society. I’m sure I will give it as a gift this holiday season and will likely read it again.