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Lecherous Limericks
You have heard of Isaac Asimov as the Master of Science Fiction. But have you heard of Isaac Asimov the Celebrated Limerick Writer?
If not, you're in for a big and beautiful surprise as the great man makes his début into the world of the d___y limerick. 100 completely original, stirringly rhymed tales to suit the sauciest tastes. Including the stories
* the sad case of the disappointed dowager Duchess
* a sprightly young fellow named Jay
* the old maid of Peru
* the lecherous pianist
Plus 96 others to delight the most ardent limerick lover!
If not, you're in for a big and beautiful surprise as the great man makes his début into the world of the d___y limerick. 100 completely original, stirringly rhymed tales to suit the sauciest tastes. Including the stories
* the sad case of the disappointed dowager Duchess
* a sprightly young fellow named Jay
* the old maid of Peru
* the lecherous pianist
Plus 96 others to delight the most ardent limerick lover!
96 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1975
2 people are currently reading
100 people want to read
About the author
Isaac Asimov
2,788 books28.1k followersWorks of prolific Russian-American writer Isaac Asimov include popular explanations of scientific principles,
The Foundation Trilogy
(1951-1953), and other volumes of fiction.
Isaac Asimov, a professor of biochemistry, wrote as a highly successful author, best known for his books.
Asimov, professor, generally considered of all time, edited more than five hundred books and ninety thousand letters and postcards. He published in nine of the ten major categories of the Dewey decimal classification but lacked only an entry in the category of philosophy (100).
People widely considered Asimov, a master of the genre alongside Robert Anson Heinlein and Arthur Charles Clarke as the "big three" during his lifetime. He later tied Galactic Empire and the Robot into the same universe as his most famous series to create a unified "future history" for his stories much like those that Heinlein pioneered and Cordwainer Smith and Poul Anderson previously produced. He penned "Nightfall," voted in 1964 as the best short story of all time; many persons still honor this title. He also produced well mysteries, fantasy, and a great quantity of nonfiction. Asimov used Paul French, the pen name, for the Lucky Starr, series of juvenile novels.
Most books of Asimov in a historical way go as far back to a time with possible question or concept at its simplest stage. He often provides and mentions well nationalities, birth, and death dates for persons and etymologies and pronunciation guides for technical terms. Guide to Science, the tripartite set Understanding Physics, and Chronology of Science and Discovery exemplify these books.
Asimov, a long-time member, reluctantly served as vice president of Mensa international and described some members of that organization as "brain-proud and aggressive about their IQs." He took more pleasure as president of the humanist association. The asteroid 5020 Asimov, the magazine Asimov's Science Fiction, an elementary school in Brooklyn in New York, and two different awards honor his name.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaac_As...
Isaac Asimov, a professor of biochemistry, wrote as a highly successful author, best known for his books.
Asimov, professor, generally considered of all time, edited more than five hundred books and ninety thousand letters and postcards. He published in nine of the ten major categories of the Dewey decimal classification but lacked only an entry in the category of philosophy (100).
People widely considered Asimov, a master of the genre alongside Robert Anson Heinlein and Arthur Charles Clarke as the "big three" during his lifetime. He later tied Galactic Empire and the Robot into the same universe as his most famous series to create a unified "future history" for his stories much like those that Heinlein pioneered and Cordwainer Smith and Poul Anderson previously produced. He penned "Nightfall," voted in 1964 as the best short story of all time; many persons still honor this title. He also produced well mysteries, fantasy, and a great quantity of nonfiction. Asimov used Paul French, the pen name, for the Lucky Starr, series of juvenile novels.
Most books of Asimov in a historical way go as far back to a time with possible question or concept at its simplest stage. He often provides and mentions well nationalities, birth, and death dates for persons and etymologies and pronunciation guides for technical terms. Guide to Science, the tripartite set Understanding Physics, and Chronology of Science and Discovery exemplify these books.
Asimov, a long-time member, reluctantly served as vice president of Mensa international and described some members of that organization as "brain-proud and aggressive about their IQs." He took more pleasure as president of the humanist association. The asteroid 5020 Asimov, the magazine Asimov's Science Fiction, an elementary school in Brooklyn in New York, and two different awards honor his name.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaac_As...
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
August 26, 2015
There was a young lady from NyonI'm sorry, it just happened. I alluded to this infamous book earlier in the week, and today we went on a day-trip to a town a little further down the valley from Geneva...
Who didn't have anything on
She said, "It's not rude
I'm artistically nude!
So who cares where my knickers have gone?"
________________________________
Two more limericks based on Swiss towns, composed on the way to work:
There was a young chap from Lausanne[The bilingual city of Biel is called "Bienne" in French-speaking Switzerland]
Received poetry tips from his gran
He said, "Have you time?
I can't find a rhyme..."
But she told him: "Just get it to scan!"
A francophile lady from Biel
Would give any Genevan a feel
She wrote, "Calling all men
I live here à Bienne
I promise, this ad is for real!"
________________________________
I have another one (and check out Warwick's contributions in messages #4 and #7):
A girl from Canton Neuchâtel[In response to a query from Not, "Canton" must be pronounced à la française, i.e. with the stress on the second syllable]
Swore: "Damn! Jesus Christ! Bloody hell!
I must find a fifth line
Or they'll hand me a fine
And I need it in German as well!
May 7, 2009
Nothing is better than the king of science fiction sharing his vagina poetry with you.
March 19, 2025
Truely horrible. Hasn’t aged well. Amusing only because it is so groan-worthy.
September 3, 2018
An unusual collection of 100 limericks written by Asimov. Each one is accompanied by some brief notes on how he came to write it and interesting takes on early versions where the rhyming did not quite fit. At the beginning of the book is a essay on the exact linguistics structure of the Limerick and the rules pertaining thereof.
May 31, 2021
I'm a massive Asimov fan, both his fiction and his scientific non fiction, so I was intrigued in the extreme to find that he'd written a book of "lecherous limericks". It can't be the same Asimov! It is.
At some point in the publication process someone must have worked out that 100 limericks total do not in any way qualify as a book. What you have then is an accompanying paragraph from the author in which he either reflects on some of the difficulties he encountered with rhyme and meter in composition or what the original reception was the first time he declaimed the limerick on the facing page. Even bulked out like this it's still ridiculously slight. If you ever thought that The Wasteland didn't deserve to be published as its own volume then you'll find this "book" ridiculous.
You could forgive the lack of quantity if there was some outstanding quality to the limericks but there isn't. They're not bad as such, with the heavy caveat below, but at best you could describe them as "functionally smutty".
They are at their most interesting, and most horrifying, as a portrait of what passed for the limits of acceptability in a middle aged male writer in the mid 70s. In many ways the actual sex stuff is tame in the extreme, the desire for lots of piv intercourse is the main... thrust... of most of these limericks. On the other hand, the political sensibilities on show are genuinely shocking. I was prepared for the old fashioned attitudes towards homosexuality which is treated, as Spike Milligan did, as a punchline, and the objectification of women is clearly established and unquestioned. What I wasn't prepared for were the rape jokes. There are several. After one he agonises about the acceptability of... the rhymes.
If you're interested in beginning to read Asimov, this would make the very worst Foundation.
At some point in the publication process someone must have worked out that 100 limericks total do not in any way qualify as a book. What you have then is an accompanying paragraph from the author in which he either reflects on some of the difficulties he encountered with rhyme and meter in composition or what the original reception was the first time he declaimed the limerick on the facing page. Even bulked out like this it's still ridiculously slight. If you ever thought that The Wasteland didn't deserve to be published as its own volume then you'll find this "book" ridiculous.
You could forgive the lack of quantity if there was some outstanding quality to the limericks but there isn't. They're not bad as such, with the heavy caveat below, but at best you could describe them as "functionally smutty".
They are at their most interesting, and most horrifying, as a portrait of what passed for the limits of acceptability in a middle aged male writer in the mid 70s. In many ways the actual sex stuff is tame in the extreme, the desire for lots of piv intercourse is the main... thrust... of most of these limericks. On the other hand, the political sensibilities on show are genuinely shocking. I was prepared for the old fashioned attitudes towards homosexuality which is treated, as Spike Milligan did, as a punchline, and the objectification of women is clearly established and unquestioned. What I wasn't prepared for were the rape jokes. There are several. After one he agonises about the acceptability of... the rhymes.
If you're interested in beginning to read Asimov, this would make the very worst Foundation.
April 7, 2017
I've read Asimov's science fiction (excellent), his mysteries (usually passable) and some of his science writing (quite good). But did you know that he also wrote dirty limericks?
Well, he did. He wrote a lot of them. And worse yet, he published them. But that's not all.
You see, this book contains 100 of his limericks and after each limerick he writes a little something about the limerick to go with it. Sometimes that extra piece is a story about the origin of the limerick and sometimes it is a deconstruction of the verse itself, explaining why he chose one word over another, or whether he should have used a different rhyme in the third and fourth line, or why making it more or less dirty wouldn't have been as good or . . .
You get the idea. So although some of these limericks are mildly entertaining, the book suffers from the constant running commentary. It is pedantic, doesn't really add anything to the enjoyment of the limericks and I ultimately found it a bit wearying. I don't need three paragraphs of explanation to understand one crude joke.
"A young lady named Hunt" indeed . . .
Well, he did. He wrote a lot of them. And worse yet, he published them. But that's not all.
You see, this book contains 100 of his limericks and after each limerick he writes a little something about the limerick to go with it. Sometimes that extra piece is a story about the origin of the limerick and sometimes it is a deconstruction of the verse itself, explaining why he chose one word over another, or whether he should have used a different rhyme in the third and fourth line, or why making it more or less dirty wouldn't have been as good or . . .
You get the idea. So although some of these limericks are mildly entertaining, the book suffers from the constant running commentary. It is pedantic, doesn't really add anything to the enjoyment of the limericks and I ultimately found it a bit wearying. I don't need three paragraphs of explanation to understand one crude joke.
"A young lady named Hunt" indeed . . .
July 24, 2014
I couldn't believe that he wrote more than this book of limericks but four or five others. Lets hear it for tenacity. But my god, the limericks were fine, but for everyone he wrote a few paragraphs about how he wrote it, how he changed it and then some comments that lead him to be a dirty old man, I don't know if it was a character but it got tired fast. His comments about women's lib were interesting and a nice time capsule of opinion from someone living through it but too old to fully appreciate it.
October 22, 2018
Given how little I like Asimov's 'serious' fiction, it should surprise no one that I'm pretty unmoved by his ostensibly sexy limericks. As a gift, there's much to be said for the weird leering-apple-and-bubble-font first paperback edition, less to be said for the poetry, the humor of which doesn't age especially well (obviously), and which fails to benefit from all the musings and annotations on the origins of each which run longer than the poems themselves. I wonder what a feminist inversion of this dubious art form might look like. Does such exist?
November 4, 2010
Why I Read This Book: I'd been fond of this book for a long time—someone dear to me gave me the hardcover as a birthday gift—but I'd never read it. The Red Cross annual book sale had a copy of the paperback in very good condition, so I bought it; somewhat to my surprise, I ended up reading it cover to cover.
I thoroughly enjoyed this book, at least as much for Asimov's reminiscences as for the limericks themselves.
(Finished 2010-10-07 23:05:40.2 EDT +/- 0.08s. Approximately.)
I thoroughly enjoyed this book, at least as much for Asimov's reminiscences as for the limericks themselves.
(Finished 2010-10-07 23:05:40.2 EDT +/- 0.08s. Approximately.)
July 1, 2021
I like that he explains the structure of a limerick, and goes into detail of how he thought of each one.
Some are fun, others are mediocre, others don't follow the structure he specified at the beginning of the book.
I wish he stuck to the structure more and didn't cheat as much. They can be a bit forced and confusing.
Fun book though. I get a kick just thinking of Asimov writing these down.
Some are fun, others are mediocre, others don't follow the structure he specified at the beginning of the book.
I wish he stuck to the structure more and didn't cheat as much. They can be a bit forced and confusing.
Fun book though. I get a kick just thinking of Asimov writing these down.
March 28, 2015
811. 100 limericks from the pen of Asimov with his trademark notes of when and why he wrote them and explanations of what constitutes a limerick. Not bad but not great. The best: A young woman from South Carolina / Placed fiddle strings 'cross her vagina / With the proper-sized cocks / What was sex became Bach's / Toccata and Fugue in D Minor.
October 10, 2013
Some were really funny, some were really just groan worthy. Some he "cheated" on and they only work if you purposely mispronounce some words.
Really, the most interesting part was his description about each one, when he came up with it and why.
Really, the most interesting part was his description about each one, when he came up with it and why.
February 1, 2025
Well, this was written in the 70s. Do not expect it to be politically correct. The guy gave us the incredibly useful Chronology of the World in addition to hundreds of good books. So, I at least, am pleased that he allowed himself to have a bit of fun.
May 29, 2024
With over 500 books to his name, there's no question that Isaac Asimov was quite the wordsmith, though I was not aware he got such a kick out of writing limericks. This book collects 100 of his efforts
He provides a good introduction explaining the ins and outs of limericks, concluding that The humor should be vulgar and should deal with actions and words concerning which society pretends nonexistence---reproduction, excretion, and so on. And, indeed, Asimov's rhymes are not for children or pearl-clutching, book banning, moral zealots. Some of them also have not aged well. In most of Asimov's limericks, women are playthings, and he displays an appallingly cavalier attitude toward rape. He alternates between bragging that his wife is a doctor, and complaining about the negative consequences of women's liberation. His own wife (the doctor) occasionally refers to him as a male chauvinist pig. If you can put all that aside, however, I think you'll find many of these limericks, if not hilarious, then pretty darned clever.
They say that if you have to explain the joke, it's not funny, but here, Asimov's explanations prove to be quite entertaining. He explains each limerick: why he chose the words he did, alternate words he wanted to use, but couldn't make fit the rhyme scheme, OR follow the rules for limerick writing. It's a fascinating look inside the man's writing process, particularly when he confesses he came up with his best ideas while in the shower.
This limerick is Asimov's favorite:
A young woman from South Carolina
Placed fiddle strings 'cross her vagina.
With the proper-sized cocks
What was sex became Bach's
Toccata and Fugue in D Minor.
And, here are some of the ones I enjoyed:
A certain hard-working young hooker
Was such an enchanting good-looker,
There were fights 'mongst the fuzz
Over whose turn it was
To pinch her, and frisk her, and book her.
The crotch of a lady from Trenton
Was too tight to make much of a dent on.
The fellows who tried
Spread the news far and wide
That she made a hard-un, a bent-un.
There was a young couple from Florida
Whose passion grew steadily torrider.
They were planning to sin
In a room, in an inn.
Who can wait? So they screwed in the corridor. .
Asimov and his wife.
The Doctor.
He provides a good introduction explaining the ins and outs of limericks, concluding that The humor should be vulgar and should deal with actions and words concerning which society pretends nonexistence---reproduction, excretion, and so on. And, indeed, Asimov's rhymes are not for children or pearl-clutching, book banning, moral zealots. Some of them also have not aged well. In most of Asimov's limericks, women are playthings, and he displays an appallingly cavalier attitude toward rape. He alternates between bragging that his wife is a doctor, and complaining about the negative consequences of women's liberation. His own wife (the doctor) occasionally refers to him as a male chauvinist pig. If you can put all that aside, however, I think you'll find many of these limericks, if not hilarious, then pretty darned clever.
They say that if you have to explain the joke, it's not funny, but here, Asimov's explanations prove to be quite entertaining. He explains each limerick: why he chose the words he did, alternate words he wanted to use, but couldn't make fit the rhyme scheme, OR follow the rules for limerick writing. It's a fascinating look inside the man's writing process, particularly when he confesses he came up with his best ideas while in the shower.
This limerick is Asimov's favorite:
A young woman from South Carolina
Placed fiddle strings 'cross her vagina.
With the proper-sized cocks
What was sex became Bach's
Toccata and Fugue in D Minor.
And, here are some of the ones I enjoyed:
A certain hard-working young hooker
Was such an enchanting good-looker,
There were fights 'mongst the fuzz
Over whose turn it was
To pinch her, and frisk her, and book her.
The crotch of a lady from Trenton
Was too tight to make much of a dent on.
The fellows who tried
Spread the news far and wide
That she made a hard-un, a bent-un.
There was a young couple from Florida
Whose passion grew steadily torrider.
They were planning to sin
In a room, in an inn.
Who can wait? So they screwed in the corridor. .
Asimov and his wife.
The Doctor.
January 26, 2021
A bit of a rarity from the over-laden Asimov shelves, we get a hundred limericks of slightly smutty nature, plus one making comedy of being raped. Ho-hum. The copious annotations to each verse (surely a carry-over of the man being paid for magazine work by the word?!) are full of notes about the birth of political correctness and the responses he gets when reciting these amongst society – well, some of this is not exactly blue, but not what many would call acceptable. Still, the rest is fun. Three and a half stars, to split the difference?
Read
November 23, 2025jokes about rape.
February 17, 2022
I had never read anything by Asimov before this, which was probably a mistake. Asimov strikes me as the typical old man everybody idulges but secretly hates. He seems to me a talentless old man who's not even aware of his own unimportance. There are some genuinely funny limmericks there, but in general there is a lot of "look at me, look at me" and I hated it, and even the good ones were ruined by his commentary.
(Notice how I have heroically avoided to mention hi sexism and racism dripping all over the place, and don't get me started on the "rape limmericks".)
(Notice how I have heroically avoided to mention hi sexism and racism dripping all over the place, and don't get me started on the "rape limmericks".)
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews