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Dedicated: The Case for Commitment in an Age of Infinite Browsing
A profoundly inspiring and transformative argument that purposeful commitment and civic engagement can be a powerful force in today’s age of restlessness and indecision.
Most of us have had this browsing through countless options on Netflix, unable to commit to watching any given movie—and losing so much time skimming reviews and considering trailers that it’s too late to watch anything at all. In a book inspired by an idea first articulated in a viral commencement address, Pete Davis argues that this is the defining characteristic of the keeping our options open. We are stuck in “Infinite Browsing Mode”—swiping through endless dating profiles without committing to a single partner, jumping from place to place searching for the next big thing, and refusing to make any decision that might close us off from an even better choice we imagine is just around the corner. This culture of restlessness and indecision, Davis argues, is causing tension in the lives of young people We want to keep our options open, and yet we yearn for the purpose, community, and depth that can only come from making deep commitments.
In Dedicated , Davis examines this quagmire, as well as the counterculture of committers who have made it to the other side. He shares what we can learn from the “long-haul heroes” who courageously commit themselves to particular places, professions, and causes—who relinquish the false freedom of an open future in exchange for the deep fulfillment of true dedication. Weaving together examples from history, personal stories, and applied psychology, Davis’s “insightful without being preachy…guide to commitment should be on everyone’s reading list” ( Booklist , starred review).
Most of us have had this browsing through countless options on Netflix, unable to commit to watching any given movie—and losing so much time skimming reviews and considering trailers that it’s too late to watch anything at all. In a book inspired by an idea first articulated in a viral commencement address, Pete Davis argues that this is the defining characteristic of the keeping our options open. We are stuck in “Infinite Browsing Mode”—swiping through endless dating profiles without committing to a single partner, jumping from place to place searching for the next big thing, and refusing to make any decision that might close us off from an even better choice we imagine is just around the corner. This culture of restlessness and indecision, Davis argues, is causing tension in the lives of young people We want to keep our options open, and yet we yearn for the purpose, community, and depth that can only come from making deep commitments.
In Dedicated , Davis examines this quagmire, as well as the counterculture of committers who have made it to the other side. He shares what we can learn from the “long-haul heroes” who courageously commit themselves to particular places, professions, and causes—who relinquish the false freedom of an open future in exchange for the deep fulfillment of true dedication. Weaving together examples from history, personal stories, and applied psychology, Davis’s “insightful without being preachy…guide to commitment should be on everyone’s reading list” ( Booklist , starred review).
272 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2021
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July 30, 2021
The late sociologist Zygmunt Bauman described life in the modern world as living in “liquid modernity,” or a state of constant change and uncertainty. Having liberated ourselves from traditional social structures and hierarchies—and with the rise of technology, cheap and efficient travel, and the internet—we now have infinitely more options available to us than at any time in history. Our religious beliefs, occupations, and social relationships are no longer pre-established at birth, freeing us to craft our own identities, careers, and lifestyles out of an endless variety of choices.
Faced with this overwhelming variety, we feel the tension of being pulled in opposite directions. On the one hand, we feel compelled to commit to a specific profession, cause, relationship, or residence, but on the other hand, we feel the need to keep our options open. And with so many options right at our fingertips, and with a culture that encourages distraction, novelty, and change, we experience this tension in virtually every area of our lives.
Whether contemplating major life decisions like choosing a career or a spouse or simply settling on which Netflix movie to watch, we live in near-constant fear that we’re making the wrong decision. And with so many possibilities available to us, there’s no shortage of opportunities to feel like we’re missing out on something better.
The problem is, while keeping our options open is the safer choice, it’s not, in the end, the more satisfying choice. The life well-lived is often a life of deep commitment to a specific cause, profession, or project, and we know this intuitively based on the fact that, while we feel compelled to keep our options open—to stay within “infinite browsing mode”—we also tend to respect those the most who fully commit themselves to specific endeavors, all while feeling a sense of shallowness in our own indecisiveness.
And so we have a paradox: we admire those who belong to the “counterculture of commitment” while ourselves remaining in infinite browsing mode. Finding our way out of this paradox—and the reasons why we should all strive to join the counterculture of commitment—is the subject of Pete Davis’s latest book, Dedicated: The Case for Commitment in an Age of Infinite Browsing.
Davis uses a useful analogy. He describes the situation of having our life choices forced on us as living in a locked room (involuntary commitment), whereas the opposite situation—what we now face in the modern world with unlimited choices—is like living in a hallway, forever going from room to room but never committing to any of them (infinite browsing mode). Either scenario leads to dissatisfaction; the ideal way to live, instead, is to browse for a bit, as all young people must do, but then to pick a room and stick with it, thus achieving voluntary commitment.
This is, of course, easier said than done. The modern world is designed to encourage novelty, flexibility, change, and the constant consumption of new experiences. Fear of missing out, buyer’s remorse, and other psychological phenomena haunt our every decision.
But, as Davis points out, endless browsing leads to its own, more insidious, problems: namely, paralysis, anomie, and a feeling of shallowness, isolation, and dissatisfaction with life. Individually, as we pass from project to project, place to place, and relationship to relationship, we never truly feel connected to something larger than ourselves in a more than superficial or fleeting way.
Collectively, this leads to apathy and disconnection. In prioritizing individual freedom without any corresponding sense of duty or obligation to others, modernity has caused us to collectively lose our connection to the community and to the common good. We are free to do anything, we commit to nothing, and social problems remain unsolved as a result of our collective indifference.
This culture of open options has infiltrated our sense of morality, our education, and our careers. Our education prioritizes resume-building and the attainment of abstract skills over commitment to craft and specific subjects, thus encouraging breadth over depth. And when we graduate, we bounce from job to job with no sense of dedication to any one company or position—and with no reciprocal commitment from our employers to us.
We’re in perpetual “preparation for advancement” mode, more concerned about achievement and money than about our passion for the type of work or social causes we’re fighting for. As Davis wrote:
“You never have to switch gears from preparation and advancement to purpose and attachment, because everyone is still set on keeping their options open. High school is all about keeping options open for college, college is about keeping options open for jobs, and now the jobs are about keeping options open for other jobs. It is “preparation for advancement” all the way down. There’s a precise word for this: careerism. It’s valuing our individual journey of achievement over everything else.”
But this constant striving for advancement is the modern equivalent of the Sisyphean task of forever pushing a boulder up a hill, only for it to roll back down, ready to be rolled back up all over again. Not only is this detrimental to our individual well-being, it causes the breakdown of institutions and democracy as we become so self-absorbed and apathetic that we no longer participate in our civic duties or notice when our political representatives sacrifice the common good for their own benefit.
But Davis is optimistic that anyone can learn to live a more enriching life, as he offers a plethora of stories about individuals who broke out of infinite browsing mode to become “long-haul heroes,” dedicated to a craft or cause and doing their part over the years to make the world a better place. He tells the story of Karen Armstrong, a former physical therapist who—instead of complaining about the empty lot filled with trash next to her New York home—took it upon herself to clean up the trash herself and replace the empty lot with a community garden. She has since committed to food justice activism, community gardening, and farming, making New York City a better place to live. It is through this sort of connection to a cause, to the community, and to others that people can best lead satisfying lives.
Overall, Davis’s argument is compelling and, I think, largely correct, but the problem is that there’s a whole lot of repetition involved to stretch this concept from its original form as a Harvard commencement speech to a 250-page book. In the second part of the book, for example, the fear of regret, the fear of association, and the fear of missing out each get a dedicated chapter despite the fact that these concepts were adequately covered in the first part of the book. The reader may enjoy all of the individual stories (I myself was not a particular fan of the excessive number of religion-based examples), but the argument itself can be expressed in far more concise terms.
And the argument itself is not without need of qualification. Obviously, it is only through commitment to an extended project that people can accomplish great things, and it is often the case that long-term commitments lead to greater life satisfaction and collectively to a better-functioning democracy. But at the same time, it’s important to note the dangers of committing too early; without sufficient experience, how can one even know what they’re passionate about?
Davis, to his credit, does address this concern, but there is a larger point he fails to consider; namely, the importance of cultivating a wide-range of knowledge and experience. In Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World, David Epstein makes essentially the opposite point: that diverse experience across multiple fields is more relevant in today's society than specialization because the problems of the modern world require interdisciplinary knowledge in the implementation of creative solutions.
Creativity itself—the crafting of something new via the connection of previously disparate elements—often requires a broad range of knowledge and experience that Davis downplays throughout the book. Think of Steve Jobs taking a calligraphy course in college that led to Apple’s beautiful typography, or to the great polymaths of history like Leonardo da Vinci or Benjamin Franklin who, due to their breadth of knowledge, contributed to the betterment of society by making advances in several fields.
In the Harvard Business Review article titled Sometimes the Best Ideas Come from Outside Your Industry, the article’s authors provide several examples of innovative solutions that came from outside the field, such as “an escalator company that borrowed a solution from the mining industry in figuring out how to install escalators in shopping malls.” As the authors write:
“When you’re working on a problem and you pool insights from analogous areas, you’re likely to get significantly greater novelty in the proposed solutions, for two reasons: People versed in analogous fields can draw on different pools of knowledge, and they’re not mentally constrained by existing, ‘known’ solutions to the problem in the target field. The greater the distance between the problem and the analogous field, the greater the novelty of the solutions.”
This applies on an individual level as well: the more range you have in terms of knowledge and experience, the more information you have at your disposal in creating novel solutions. This ability to bring fresh perspectives to a problem is not, to my mind, adequately considered by Davis.
So take the argument for what it’s worth. Dedication to specific projects and causes is usually necessary for the pursuit of individual happiness (by connecting us to other people and to larger social causes and crafts) and in the solving of social problems at the local level. At the same time, one should guard against taking this advice too far, committing too early or too intensely and thereby limiting their own cognitive flexibility and capacity for creativity.
Faced with this overwhelming variety, we feel the tension of being pulled in opposite directions. On the one hand, we feel compelled to commit to a specific profession, cause, relationship, or residence, but on the other hand, we feel the need to keep our options open. And with so many options right at our fingertips, and with a culture that encourages distraction, novelty, and change, we experience this tension in virtually every area of our lives.
Whether contemplating major life decisions like choosing a career or a spouse or simply settling on which Netflix movie to watch, we live in near-constant fear that we’re making the wrong decision. And with so many possibilities available to us, there’s no shortage of opportunities to feel like we’re missing out on something better.
The problem is, while keeping our options open is the safer choice, it’s not, in the end, the more satisfying choice. The life well-lived is often a life of deep commitment to a specific cause, profession, or project, and we know this intuitively based on the fact that, while we feel compelled to keep our options open—to stay within “infinite browsing mode”—we also tend to respect those the most who fully commit themselves to specific endeavors, all while feeling a sense of shallowness in our own indecisiveness.
And so we have a paradox: we admire those who belong to the “counterculture of commitment” while ourselves remaining in infinite browsing mode. Finding our way out of this paradox—and the reasons why we should all strive to join the counterculture of commitment—is the subject of Pete Davis’s latest book, Dedicated: The Case for Commitment in an Age of Infinite Browsing.
Davis uses a useful analogy. He describes the situation of having our life choices forced on us as living in a locked room (involuntary commitment), whereas the opposite situation—what we now face in the modern world with unlimited choices—is like living in a hallway, forever going from room to room but never committing to any of them (infinite browsing mode). Either scenario leads to dissatisfaction; the ideal way to live, instead, is to browse for a bit, as all young people must do, but then to pick a room and stick with it, thus achieving voluntary commitment.
This is, of course, easier said than done. The modern world is designed to encourage novelty, flexibility, change, and the constant consumption of new experiences. Fear of missing out, buyer’s remorse, and other psychological phenomena haunt our every decision.
But, as Davis points out, endless browsing leads to its own, more insidious, problems: namely, paralysis, anomie, and a feeling of shallowness, isolation, and dissatisfaction with life. Individually, as we pass from project to project, place to place, and relationship to relationship, we never truly feel connected to something larger than ourselves in a more than superficial or fleeting way.
Collectively, this leads to apathy and disconnection. In prioritizing individual freedom without any corresponding sense of duty or obligation to others, modernity has caused us to collectively lose our connection to the community and to the common good. We are free to do anything, we commit to nothing, and social problems remain unsolved as a result of our collective indifference.
This culture of open options has infiltrated our sense of morality, our education, and our careers. Our education prioritizes resume-building and the attainment of abstract skills over commitment to craft and specific subjects, thus encouraging breadth over depth. And when we graduate, we bounce from job to job with no sense of dedication to any one company or position—and with no reciprocal commitment from our employers to us.
We’re in perpetual “preparation for advancement” mode, more concerned about achievement and money than about our passion for the type of work or social causes we’re fighting for. As Davis wrote:
“You never have to switch gears from preparation and advancement to purpose and attachment, because everyone is still set on keeping their options open. High school is all about keeping options open for college, college is about keeping options open for jobs, and now the jobs are about keeping options open for other jobs. It is “preparation for advancement” all the way down. There’s a precise word for this: careerism. It’s valuing our individual journey of achievement over everything else.”
But this constant striving for advancement is the modern equivalent of the Sisyphean task of forever pushing a boulder up a hill, only for it to roll back down, ready to be rolled back up all over again. Not only is this detrimental to our individual well-being, it causes the breakdown of institutions and democracy as we become so self-absorbed and apathetic that we no longer participate in our civic duties or notice when our political representatives sacrifice the common good for their own benefit.
But Davis is optimistic that anyone can learn to live a more enriching life, as he offers a plethora of stories about individuals who broke out of infinite browsing mode to become “long-haul heroes,” dedicated to a craft or cause and doing their part over the years to make the world a better place. He tells the story of Karen Armstrong, a former physical therapist who—instead of complaining about the empty lot filled with trash next to her New York home—took it upon herself to clean up the trash herself and replace the empty lot with a community garden. She has since committed to food justice activism, community gardening, and farming, making New York City a better place to live. It is through this sort of connection to a cause, to the community, and to others that people can best lead satisfying lives.
Overall, Davis’s argument is compelling and, I think, largely correct, but the problem is that there’s a whole lot of repetition involved to stretch this concept from its original form as a Harvard commencement speech to a 250-page book. In the second part of the book, for example, the fear of regret, the fear of association, and the fear of missing out each get a dedicated chapter despite the fact that these concepts were adequately covered in the first part of the book. The reader may enjoy all of the individual stories (I myself was not a particular fan of the excessive number of religion-based examples), but the argument itself can be expressed in far more concise terms.
And the argument itself is not without need of qualification. Obviously, it is only through commitment to an extended project that people can accomplish great things, and it is often the case that long-term commitments lead to greater life satisfaction and collectively to a better-functioning democracy. But at the same time, it’s important to note the dangers of committing too early; without sufficient experience, how can one even know what they’re passionate about?
Davis, to his credit, does address this concern, but there is a larger point he fails to consider; namely, the importance of cultivating a wide-range of knowledge and experience. In Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World, David Epstein makes essentially the opposite point: that diverse experience across multiple fields is more relevant in today's society than specialization because the problems of the modern world require interdisciplinary knowledge in the implementation of creative solutions.
Creativity itself—the crafting of something new via the connection of previously disparate elements—often requires a broad range of knowledge and experience that Davis downplays throughout the book. Think of Steve Jobs taking a calligraphy course in college that led to Apple’s beautiful typography, or to the great polymaths of history like Leonardo da Vinci or Benjamin Franklin who, due to their breadth of knowledge, contributed to the betterment of society by making advances in several fields.
In the Harvard Business Review article titled Sometimes the Best Ideas Come from Outside Your Industry, the article’s authors provide several examples of innovative solutions that came from outside the field, such as “an escalator company that borrowed a solution from the mining industry in figuring out how to install escalators in shopping malls.” As the authors write:
“When you’re working on a problem and you pool insights from analogous areas, you’re likely to get significantly greater novelty in the proposed solutions, for two reasons: People versed in analogous fields can draw on different pools of knowledge, and they’re not mentally constrained by existing, ‘known’ solutions to the problem in the target field. The greater the distance between the problem and the analogous field, the greater the novelty of the solutions.”
This applies on an individual level as well: the more range you have in terms of knowledge and experience, the more information you have at your disposal in creating novel solutions. This ability to bring fresh perspectives to a problem is not, to my mind, adequately considered by Davis.
So take the argument for what it’s worth. Dedication to specific projects and causes is usually necessary for the pursuit of individual happiness (by connecting us to other people and to larger social causes and crafts) and in the solving of social problems at the local level. At the same time, one should guard against taking this advice too far, committing too early or too intensely and thereby limiting their own cognitive flexibility and capacity for creativity.
May 3, 2021
A rare book that got me to think in a new way and provided comfort at the same time. I better understand the tension central to my own life, my generation, and maybe our time -- the tension of wanting to keep our options open, but wanting to be people that make a difference. By the end, I felt inspired to buck the trend Davis so clearly articulates and actually deeply commit to things... neighborhoods, friends, jobs, ideas, causes. I really think we'd all be way better off if everyone read this book.
October 3, 2021
not a bad book, but felt like it could have been boiled down to a really good ted talk. recent politically-adjacent books continue to push the line of conversation right up to calling out capitalism, only to stumble at the finish line in order to ensure a pile up of npr-donating readers. a shining example in 'dedicated' is the - white progressive invoking mlk without discussing socialist solutions -, it's great information to offer up, going through his dedication to community, building up locally, the ability to coalesce and have a base to vouch for your expertise, prior to taking on systematic country-wide (and global) issues. but it's the further left solutions davis avoids. similar name drops of cornell west and ralph nader add well-deserved gumption to the mix, but, again, focus on their endurance (i get it, that's the point of the book), but lacks the full expression of the more radical sides to their work. which is kind of ironic because the book often discusses how we worry about associating and deterring others with our associations. and with so much talk of community and labor, you'd think at some point marx and communism would get a shout out, but the material steers clear. perhaps these critiques are unfair, davis expresses at the beginning his personal limited scope (well educated white lawyer), and he never claimed 'dedicated' would be a radical work, rather fits solutions within community and government confines, expanding rather than dismantling. hmm, maybe that means i'm "dedicated" to more radical solutions and proved his point?
December 14, 2021
Perhaps the most powerful one is your story: the one you tell yourself - and even better, others - about why you are committed to whatever you've decided to do.
***
"All meaning accrues in duration."
***
The German word for authenticity, Eigentlichkeit roughly translates to "ownedness" or "being one's own."
***
...dedicate has two meanings - to make something holy and to stick at something for a long time. We do something holy in those few extraordinary moments when we make commitments. And we do something holy in those countless ordinary moments when we keep them.
***
"All meaning accrues in duration."
***
The German word for authenticity, Eigentlichkeit roughly translates to "ownedness" or "being one's own."
***
...dedicate has two meanings - to make something holy and to stick at something for a long time. We do something holy in those few extraordinary moments when we make commitments. And we do something holy in those countless ordinary moments when we keep them.
July 7, 2021
This was a great read, so I’ll start by saying why I’m “only” giving it three stars. If I could, I’d give it 3.5, because the concept is good and a lot of the material is interesting. But at times it felt like a survey, almost, and the structure was a little flimsy. A lot of things introduced early were revisited later, which made some of it feel repetitive. Overall I had the feeling that it could have been more concise, even though it’s already a mere 250 pages (but I think almost every book could be more concise…).
That said, the book uses good examples/real world stories, and I wouldn’t think it would help to remove any of those. Sometimes after reading an example I was most struck by how vague and nebulous this concept of “commitment” is, how some of the ways we commit are things that we don’t think of as commitment. Picking a career is commitment, but so is making a friend, or going back to the same cafe over and over. Lots of the people in these examples became committed to things by asking to help, not by thinking over whether it was something they wanted to commit to or realizing they were committing to something. I think this is both obvious and interesting but also wished the author had addressed this more: many people seem to “fall” into commitments, but the book focuses on the commitments themselves and never acknowledges how often these things are merely chance. I think the bigger factor is that we live in a culture that has fewer and fewer opportunities for these kinds of commitments, and we are less and less likely to fall into something. However, this book does acknowledge this prevailing element of the culture and encourages people to find commitments; there are just a couple areas where I wanted it to go a step further.
On a personal level, this was a slightly awkward book to be reading a month before I pack my bags, uproot my life, and move to a different continent. At first it made me doubt my decision (my commitment!) to starting again somewhere new. But as I read on it also made me see the ways I had committed to my life thus far, and made me feel again that my decision to move is reasonable. The book focuses a lot on community as a commitment, and I realized that many of the things I have committed to have formed the foundation of my communities: the volunteering I took up in 2012, which has introduced me to tons of people, given me purpose, led me to interact with all kinds of people I wouldn’t have otherwise, and that I have continued to work with (albeit sporadically) until today; my work in coffee, which also built my social life, and my work as a bartender, which allowed me to be part of a community, to help build more community, and eventually to be what Davis would qualify as a “steward”, to some extent, to the jazz community in Portland.
The irony, I realized, is that about two years ago I decided to commit to bartending, and that’s when it fell apart for me. After five years of not really being committed, I dedicated myself to the idea, to trying to find a way to stay in the field in a position that provided financial security, and I couldn’t find one. Reading this made me believe that I had actually tried harder than I had previously thought, that I’m not as flighty as I think I am. In many ways I want commitment - a relationship, for example - and it isn’t usually me who’s scared to take the leap, it’s that my willingness to commit isn’t close to being matched by other parties, personal or professional.
On a related note, I wish the author had made a more concerted effort to make the connection between the culture of keeping options open and the lack of commitments on the part of individuals. He did a good job of addressing how a lack of commitment changes industry and therefore the working population, but didn’t directly address the ways that companies keeping their options open affect individuals. He addresses the culture of lateral movements, and writes about how companies keeping options open affect communities (Walmart and GE abandoning towns, for example) but I would have liked to see more about the impact on individuals: it makes it harder for individuals to commit to careers, especially if they barely pay enough to cover the cost of living.
This book offers a lot of insight to the importance of commitment to cultural movements and activism, and these parts are particularly relevant to this moment, when there are so many movements underway and so many people coming to them now. Who will commit to the long run? It’s not all about the marches that get attention and make the front page, it’s also about the boring everyday details. Those are just as important for making change.
In general I found this book enlightening and hopeful and would recommend it to just about everyone, but especially to my fellow millennials. It’s a great way to identify some of the sources of our general dissatisfaction and find some tangible ways to improve.
That said, the book uses good examples/real world stories, and I wouldn’t think it would help to remove any of those. Sometimes after reading an example I was most struck by how vague and nebulous this concept of “commitment” is, how some of the ways we commit are things that we don’t think of as commitment. Picking a career is commitment, but so is making a friend, or going back to the same cafe over and over. Lots of the people in these examples became committed to things by asking to help, not by thinking over whether it was something they wanted to commit to or realizing they were committing to something. I think this is both obvious and interesting but also wished the author had addressed this more: many people seem to “fall” into commitments, but the book focuses on the commitments themselves and never acknowledges how often these things are merely chance. I think the bigger factor is that we live in a culture that has fewer and fewer opportunities for these kinds of commitments, and we are less and less likely to fall into something. However, this book does acknowledge this prevailing element of the culture and encourages people to find commitments; there are just a couple areas where I wanted it to go a step further.
On a personal level, this was a slightly awkward book to be reading a month before I pack my bags, uproot my life, and move to a different continent. At first it made me doubt my decision (my commitment!) to starting again somewhere new. But as I read on it also made me see the ways I had committed to my life thus far, and made me feel again that my decision to move is reasonable. The book focuses a lot on community as a commitment, and I realized that many of the things I have committed to have formed the foundation of my communities: the volunteering I took up in 2012, which has introduced me to tons of people, given me purpose, led me to interact with all kinds of people I wouldn’t have otherwise, and that I have continued to work with (albeit sporadically) until today; my work in coffee, which also built my social life, and my work as a bartender, which allowed me to be part of a community, to help build more community, and eventually to be what Davis would qualify as a “steward”, to some extent, to the jazz community in Portland.
The irony, I realized, is that about two years ago I decided to commit to bartending, and that’s when it fell apart for me. After five years of not really being committed, I dedicated myself to the idea, to trying to find a way to stay in the field in a position that provided financial security, and I couldn’t find one. Reading this made me believe that I had actually tried harder than I had previously thought, that I’m not as flighty as I think I am. In many ways I want commitment - a relationship, for example - and it isn’t usually me who’s scared to take the leap, it’s that my willingness to commit isn’t close to being matched by other parties, personal or professional.
On a related note, I wish the author had made a more concerted effort to make the connection between the culture of keeping options open and the lack of commitments on the part of individuals. He did a good job of addressing how a lack of commitment changes industry and therefore the working population, but didn’t directly address the ways that companies keeping their options open affect individuals. He addresses the culture of lateral movements, and writes about how companies keeping options open affect communities (Walmart and GE abandoning towns, for example) but I would have liked to see more about the impact on individuals: it makes it harder for individuals to commit to careers, especially if they barely pay enough to cover the cost of living.
This book offers a lot of insight to the importance of commitment to cultural movements and activism, and these parts are particularly relevant to this moment, when there are so many movements underway and so many people coming to them now. Who will commit to the long run? It’s not all about the marches that get attention and make the front page, it’s also about the boring everyday details. Those are just as important for making change.
In general I found this book enlightening and hopeful and would recommend it to just about everyone, but especially to my fellow millennials. It’s a great way to identify some of the sources of our general dissatisfaction and find some tangible ways to improve.
May 5, 2022
I don’t agree with the central premise that our current culture is defined by indecision and lack of commitment. This book comes off as a lot of finger wagging at the certain generations (even though he says he isn’t doing that) without a lot of nuance or consideration of less-privileged experiences. And if one does accept the premise our current culture is struggling to commit, he fails to acknowledge or explore significant factors — like how we’ve become disillusioned to corporate/institutional exploitation of employee loyalty and commitment, how the housing market prevents people from committing to place, the overworked and underpaid status of people in laudable (teaching, non profits, healthcare, etc) professions. He might be onto something about commitment— but I don’t think it’s that people don’t want to. I wish instead of proposing things as one type of person vs another, he’d instead offered an exploration of examples of commitment and insights into how to prioritize and commit in this chaotic and difficult world.
And then, from a writing standpoint — the moment you think he might be on to something, he can’t even formulate the whole idea in his own words and instead has to quote a million (yes, this is hyperbole) other people to get there. It seems like he can’t even be committed enough to his own ideas to do the hard work of figuring out how to say things for himself.
And then, from a writing standpoint — the moment you think he might be on to something, he can’t even formulate the whole idea in his own words and instead has to quote a million (yes, this is hyperbole) other people to get there. It seems like he can’t even be committed enough to his own ideas to do the hard work of figuring out how to say things for himself.
February 3, 2024
I heard this author on a podcast and I was impressed with his thought process and his message. So I picked up his book when I had a chance. While I think what he says applies to all age groups (even though he talks about the younger generations) I can see what he says at church, at work, in my kids and their friends, etc. I appreciated the validity of his message and there were plenty of "food for thought" statements.
I listened to the audio and have already put this in my reread pile because there was just so much information tossed around. It did seem a little repetitive because he often revisited the same ideas but he managed to say it in a different way.
I also wasn't as annoyed as other listeners about the narration. I loved his enthusiasm and passion he infused into this message. So 4 stars.
I listened to the audio and have already put this in my reread pile because there was just so much information tossed around. It did seem a little repetitive because he often revisited the same ideas but he managed to say it in a different way.
I also wasn't as annoyed as other listeners about the narration. I loved his enthusiasm and passion he infused into this message. So 4 stars.
March 12, 2022
a rhetorical accomplishment. there’s a lot of reworking of definitions pete does throughout the book that reminded me movements and cultures require shared language. for the Dedicated, pete does a great job of establishing that language in a way that forms a rallying cry.
what i wanted more of was a clear incentive to commit. what really am i missing out on? the chance to be recognized and respected a local hero? the gratification of knowing something deeply? the kind of love that is a lifelong love? i admit my whole life is shorter than some of the careers and marriages described within, but as someone who has committed before… i can’t say it necessarily makes me want to commit again. sometimes you gain very little by committing; there is often a journey but no reward (except the journeyperson’s badge). i generally agree that if our goal is to “improve society as a community, building off a shared moral code,” then commitment is probably an imperative. but is that what the people want? what will incentivize this looking outward? what other individual benefit will dethrone the biweekly paycheck?
lastly, i have a nagging skepticism about commitment as a choice available to everyone. pete disagrees—he doesn’t think commitment belongs to the privileged. but he did mention in conversation that commitment has some relationship with stability. that rang true for me: it’s tough to commit when there’s unpredictability. and i’d argue stability is very much tied to privilege. but… i’m still thinking about this question.
what i wanted more of was a clear incentive to commit. what really am i missing out on? the chance to be recognized and respected a local hero? the gratification of knowing something deeply? the kind of love that is a lifelong love? i admit my whole life is shorter than some of the careers and marriages described within, but as someone who has committed before… i can’t say it necessarily makes me want to commit again. sometimes you gain very little by committing; there is often a journey but no reward (except the journeyperson’s badge). i generally agree that if our goal is to “improve society as a community, building off a shared moral code,” then commitment is probably an imperative. but is that what the people want? what will incentivize this looking outward? what other individual benefit will dethrone the biweekly paycheck?
lastly, i have a nagging skepticism about commitment as a choice available to everyone. pete disagrees—he doesn’t think commitment belongs to the privileged. but he did mention in conversation that commitment has some relationship with stability. that rang true for me: it’s tough to commit when there’s unpredictability. and i’d argue stability is very much tied to privilege. but… i’m still thinking about this question.
December 22, 2021
Pete Davies puts into words what I haven't been able to verbalise, write or read before. I can't tell you how much I felt aligned with the author's vision about some of the dilemmas we all feel and live in this modern world.
He talks about how "infinite browsing mode" permeates much of our modern world (from mindless Netflix scrolling to shallow careerism to relationship paralysis and how "keeping our options open") tends to leave us ungrounded and unfulfilled. This culture of restlessness and indecision is causing tension in the lives of young people today: We want to keep our options open, and yet we yearn for the purpose, community, and depth.
The entire book is a strong case for commitment in an age of infinitive browsing. The book is a call to action for commitment, to people and places and causes, to plant ourselves and find solidity and solidarity rather than chasing novelty.
He talks about how "infinite browsing mode" permeates much of our modern world (from mindless Netflix scrolling to shallow careerism to relationship paralysis and how "keeping our options open") tends to leave us ungrounded and unfulfilled. This culture of restlessness and indecision is causing tension in the lives of young people today: We want to keep our options open, and yet we yearn for the purpose, community, and depth.
The entire book is a strong case for commitment in an age of infinitive browsing. The book is a call to action for commitment, to people and places and causes, to plant ourselves and find solidity and solidarity rather than chasing novelty.
December 22, 2023
A motivating case for choosing things in life worth committing to, and putting in the long, slow, work of achieving them.
I'm prone to jumping around from idea to idea, project to project, rarely finishing any of them. Dedicated does a great job laying out this problem that I feel in both society and myself, and has definitely inspired me to focus on fewer things and actually see them through to completion. Or, at least to want do that. It remains to be seen whether I follow through...
This book originated in a speech, and it bears the marks of those books that might have best been served in a shorter medium. It's often too-broad and over-generalizing, and could have benefited from staking more of a position when it comes to the solutions to a society of infinite browsing. Still, if you've been feeling listless, aimless, distracted, or unmoored from stable, meaningful activities and institutions, this could be the thing that kicks you into doing something about it. Preferably in your local community, with your neighbors.
I'm prone to jumping around from idea to idea, project to project, rarely finishing any of them. Dedicated does a great job laying out this problem that I feel in both society and myself, and has definitely inspired me to focus on fewer things and actually see them through to completion. Or, at least to want do that. It remains to be seen whether I follow through...
This book originated in a speech, and it bears the marks of those books that might have best been served in a shorter medium. It's often too-broad and over-generalizing, and could have benefited from staking more of a position when it comes to the solutions to a society of infinite browsing. Still, if you've been feeling listless, aimless, distracted, or unmoored from stable, meaningful activities and institutions, this could be the thing that kicks you into doing something about it. Preferably in your local community, with your neighbors.
July 28, 2021
This was a great book, grappling with the realities of my generation and “liquid modernity”. Davis draws on many of the same conversation partners that I have been conversant with over the last few years, so the concepts were very familiar.
Davis never explicitly identified himself with a religious group, but he quotes many Christian through leaders and public theologians (e.g. Dorothy Day, Lewis, Taylor, Niebuhr, etc.). I mention this because I think there is an important connection between the idea of “Commitment” and the implications of Christian theology. In other words, I do not think that it is accidental that Davis found a rich resource for exploring the idea of commitment in Christianity.
Davis also quotes an article a friend of mine wrote, coining the term “Yolo pop”. I thought that was hilarious.
Davis never explicitly identified himself with a religious group, but he quotes many Christian through leaders and public theologians (e.g. Dorothy Day, Lewis, Taylor, Niebuhr, etc.). I mention this because I think there is an important connection between the idea of “Commitment” and the implications of Christian theology. In other words, I do not think that it is accidental that Davis found a rich resource for exploring the idea of commitment in Christianity.
Davis also quotes an article a friend of mine wrote, coining the term “Yolo pop”. I thought that was hilarious.
January 13, 2024
I’m not sure why I liked this so much, but it was very comforting to read. It probably was a bit longer than it needed to be, but overall really enjoyed it!
July 29, 2021
Pete Davis really hit the nail on the head with his observation of the Infinite Browsing mode the world is currently living in. And from there, he made a solid case for Commitment. I hadn't realised how much the culture of keeping open options was ingrained onto my understanding of the world, and seeing it laid out on paper was really eye-opening. I also like that Davis offered a compromise between having alternatives when you need to, but also buckling down and dedicating yourself to something without the fear of missing out.
I think this book would be most motivational to the people who already has an idea of what they want to commit to but still hesitate because of the fear of making a mistake. I'm one of these people, so I find myself holding on to these words like buoys (is it the feeling of being preached to at church?). But I think to the people who are paralysed by choices right now, it would also be worth a read.
I intended to give this 5 stars at times, but then in some places the book didn't go the length it needed to, or when the arguments turn to morality, it can feel a bit like it was trying too hard (maybe it should be explored further in a different book to get to the depth that it needed). And a problem I find with most self-help books - they place the responsibility on the individual to move the needle instead of the organisations and the culture, when there's clearly a power imbalance here. Obviously, it's up to us to change the course of our own lives. However, the decision to commit to our "calling" is not always in our hands, and I think the book brushed past this or glorified the motivational surface of some stories without accommodating for context. But for the ones who are lucky enough to make the decision, I think this book would be of some consolation.
I think this book would be most motivational to the people who already has an idea of what they want to commit to but still hesitate because of the fear of making a mistake. I'm one of these people, so I find myself holding on to these words like buoys (is it the feeling of being preached to at church?). But I think to the people who are paralysed by choices right now, it would also be worth a read.
I intended to give this 5 stars at times, but then in some places the book didn't go the length it needed to, or when the arguments turn to morality, it can feel a bit like it was trying too hard (maybe it should be explored further in a different book to get to the depth that it needed). And a problem I find with most self-help books - they place the responsibility on the individual to move the needle instead of the organisations and the culture, when there's clearly a power imbalance here. Obviously, it's up to us to change the course of our own lives. However, the decision to commit to our "calling" is not always in our hands, and I think the book brushed past this or glorified the motivational surface of some stories without accommodating for context. But for the ones who are lucky enough to make the decision, I think this book would be of some consolation.
June 2, 2021
If you are self help curious, but averse to the weird bootstrap and productivity obsessed rightwing tendencies of the genre, then this book is for you. It is not really a self help book, nor is it necessarily an "anti self help" book. I found it a mostly inspiring and clearly organized read but the main problem with the book is it has SO MANY QUOTES. It is impossible to get a rhythm reading it as every other line is "as the famous poet/banker/podcaster/boxing coach/yoga instructor X once said..." This book is chock full of what Zizek would call "wisdom," that is cute little aphorisms and quotes that are long on applicability and short on deep meaning. The author quotes P.J. Voght, a (recently cancelled?) podcaster, Felix Biederman, also a podcaster (though he calls him a writer, lol) and, hilariously, Drake. Not like a quote from an interview with Drake about his career, but literally a line from the chorus of "They Know." I enjoy all these people's work, but they, and the thousand other people quoted in this book, really don't need to be there. If you can get over the incessant quotes and anecdotes, than this is an enjoyable and inspiring read.
December 19, 2021
DNF at about 5%. Do you ever start a book and you just know, even before you finish the introduction, that it's going to be absolutely insufferable? The tone here is already so patronizing. The arguments, such as they are, are fundamentally conservative even though the author purports to be a progressive, not to mention nostalgic for a time he was never alive in. I started to get the feeling (and based on some of the other reviews I think I might be correct) that Davis is never actually going to examine why things are the way he claims they are, nor does he present much actual evidence to back up those claims. I just finished reading David Epstein's Range, which is basically the polar opposite of this book in every respect, including the fact that it's actually good.
Davis would probably chew me out for not "committing," but life is too short to read books you know you're gonna hate.
Davis would probably chew me out for not "committing," but life is too short to read books you know you're gonna hate.
October 24, 2022
This book really hit the spot, particularly the parts about liberation-dedication and professionalism in contrast to careerism. I’ll think twice before keeping my options open!!
July 21, 2025
Maybe the meaning of life is just committing yourself to something. Yerrrr‼️
Read
April 12, 2024I really like Pete Davis, but I kept thinking "this could have been an email." I agree with basically everything he says, but just watch his TED talk or whatever.
February 20, 2021
Blatantly Hypocritical, Yet Strong Discussion Regardless. Davis repeatedly claims that he is not "selling a particular religion, creed, or cause"... and yet the very subtitle of the book is "The *CASE* for Commitment..." (emphasis mine). Though to be fair, the examples Davis cites tend to be individual trees, while making the case that they are representative of the forest they are in. Davis, in this text, isn't selling a tree - he is trying to sell the forest. Yet he *is* trying to sell a *particular* forest - the forest of long standing and wide reaching oaks, rather than the taller, shallower, and less connected pines. Still, the case he makes (and I'm forgiving the lack of bibliography, for the moment, as this was an ARC - though I *do* expect an extensive one to be provided in the published edition), is at minimum worthy of consideration and discussion. Yes, the language choices are a bit leftist at times, and yes, there are a few holes in the logic and reasonings, but overall, the case made is an interesting contrast to the currently dominant thinking, and this is why I'm willing to overlook the lack of bibliography in this ARC and rate the book at 4, rather than 3, stars. In the end, an interesting take on things that perhaps goes a bit *too* far at times, but is a refreshing change of pace at others. Recommended.
August 22, 2022
reading this was a salve. the question of "liberation to do what, to build what, and how/from where do we pull the dedication to do it for the long run?" is so critical for me and my burnt out wandering peers right now. grateful he gathered this argument and made it easier to visualize the rewards of depth over novelty. especially appreciate that he pulls from so many theological principles, because finding reverence is indeed probably how we fuel an effort for the long run. book could have been 30-40% shorter imo.
July 2, 2022
I want everyone I know to read this book! It is as inspiring as it comes to think about how to make the most of our lives and develop roots in more ways than one: in passions, in careers, and in communities. It affirms a lot of experiences I've already had and points me to lean into the type of experiences that build over time, because those are ultimately the rewarding ones. A new all time favorite and one I hope to share with others. Thank you to Ryley for the recommendation
August 18, 2021
Stop browsing, choose something and stick to it. That’s what really going to make is happy. No browser ever accomplished anything; it’s the single minded pursuit of dedicated people that has made all the differences. Sometimes they work for decades before results are seen. So set small goals of victory. Involve others.
I like this book!
I like this book!
June 5, 2022
I like a good self-help once in a while but this felt more like a big collection of anecdotes, personal stories from friends of friends and sooo many quotes. It was just too much. The beginning was interesting but overall this book was pretty uninspiring and boring.
July 5, 2023
Was this very self-serious? Yes. Was I also digging it?? Also yes.
“When we're young, we often want freedom from the world. We want an unencumbered self, where nothing outside touches us and where we have no responsibility or rules. This is a limited freedom- the ‘freedom of ghosts.’ Purpose gives us freedom in the world. It's the freedom that comes when we enter into relationship with particular parts of the world- when we develop an ability to respond to them, and therefore feel a responsibility for them. When we fulfill that responsibility, we get to experience real pride. Commitment is co-owning a little part of existence and, in doing so, loving existence itself a little bit more. Through commitment, ‘you are demonstrating yourself that you are someone of substance.’ Through commitment ‘you become real to yourself.’” (126)
“If you start to feel like your neighborhood is becoming an administrative unit at the intersection of various indiscriminate flows of action between opaque energy, transportation, housing, and police departments, you won't be in a relationship with it for much longer.
MLK Jr. described this as a system that ‘leaves the person outside’, ‘the sense of participation is lost, the feeling that ordinary individuals influence important decisions vanishes, and we become separated and diminished.’ It is also described as viewing the public sphere as a ‘vending machine’: You put in your votes and tax dollars, and out comes public services. There's no participation, no interconnectivity, no relationship, and no commitment necessary. You can't be an owner, but you can be a chooser. You may be separated from the workings of the system by heavy glass, prevented from truly participating in its design, but as consolation, you can choose among options. Instead of having a ‘capacity as citizens to shape the forces that govern our collective density’ we are left with a capacity as individuals to choose what we want among a menu of options offered to us by anonymous and inaccessible bureaucracies.
When public life is something we approach as an active participant- as a co-owner- we experience it as a series of committed relationships: to systems, processes, projects, places, and neighbors. When those shared enterprises struggle in the short term, your relationships keep you loyal over the long term- and even transform your original conceptions of your personal interests and ideals.” (187)
“We start to experience the world as starkly divided between two spheres: a vast, cold world of indifferent strangers and the warm hearth of our small, intimate group of family and close friends. On a moral level, we start to derive all our honor from how we treat this inner circle while renouncing any responsibility for a wider sphere. And because the outside world provides such little meaning for us, we start to demand much more meaning from our inner circle often more than any small set of people can really provide.” (199)
“Education helps students develop bonds to particular causes and crafts, ideas and institutions, communities and people. Duty and reverence, in other words, are forces that help us attach. To learn about the world is to take responsibility for it. ‘Knowledge means responsibility and responsibility means care.’ Knowledge implicates us: The more we know, the more responsible we are. To specialize in some area is to take responsibility for a corner of the world.” (206)
“The feeling, for many, is one of being uprooted. Lost is the sense that we live for our neighbors, our comrades, or our ancestors- that there is some larger story into which we are woven. All that's left is wellness and security: staying alive, seeking experience, and enjoying the ride.
Yet, ‘trees whose roots are almost entirely eaten away fall at the first blow.’ So we start grasping for quick and easy rootedness anywhere we can find it.
One way we do so is through nostalgia. If we cannot cultivate new cultures and practices- or sustain inherited cultures and practices- we grasp hold of the memories of times when our cultures felt more alive. Sometimes, nostalgia is goofy and innocuous while other forms of nostalgia are more consequential: politicians who run on reviving some idealized form of the past; community leaders who feel like their role is no longer to steward a living culture, but to ensure their culture never changes.
Worse still, nostalgia is often used to cover up a lack of living commitment in the present. A living commitment is like tending to a fire; nostalgia is like gathering around a fire's dying embers. It might be warm right now, but it won't be for long.
And perhaps the most dangerous trend stemming from our modern identity crisis is the practice of taking a tiny scrap of identity that remains after the flood and having an outsize relationship with it. Instead of it being one part of you, it becomes an idol and you feel a need to signal your devotion to it in dramatic ways.” (230)
“When we're young, we often want freedom from the world. We want an unencumbered self, where nothing outside touches us and where we have no responsibility or rules. This is a limited freedom- the ‘freedom of ghosts.’ Purpose gives us freedom in the world. It's the freedom that comes when we enter into relationship with particular parts of the world- when we develop an ability to respond to them, and therefore feel a responsibility for them. When we fulfill that responsibility, we get to experience real pride. Commitment is co-owning a little part of existence and, in doing so, loving existence itself a little bit more. Through commitment, ‘you are demonstrating yourself that you are someone of substance.’ Through commitment ‘you become real to yourself.’” (126)
“If you start to feel like your neighborhood is becoming an administrative unit at the intersection of various indiscriminate flows of action between opaque energy, transportation, housing, and police departments, you won't be in a relationship with it for much longer.
MLK Jr. described this as a system that ‘leaves the person outside’, ‘the sense of participation is lost, the feeling that ordinary individuals influence important decisions vanishes, and we become separated and diminished.’ It is also described as viewing the public sphere as a ‘vending machine’: You put in your votes and tax dollars, and out comes public services. There's no participation, no interconnectivity, no relationship, and no commitment necessary. You can't be an owner, but you can be a chooser. You may be separated from the workings of the system by heavy glass, prevented from truly participating in its design, but as consolation, you can choose among options. Instead of having a ‘capacity as citizens to shape the forces that govern our collective density’ we are left with a capacity as individuals to choose what we want among a menu of options offered to us by anonymous and inaccessible bureaucracies.
When public life is something we approach as an active participant- as a co-owner- we experience it as a series of committed relationships: to systems, processes, projects, places, and neighbors. When those shared enterprises struggle in the short term, your relationships keep you loyal over the long term- and even transform your original conceptions of your personal interests and ideals.” (187)
“We start to experience the world as starkly divided between two spheres: a vast, cold world of indifferent strangers and the warm hearth of our small, intimate group of family and close friends. On a moral level, we start to derive all our honor from how we treat this inner circle while renouncing any responsibility for a wider sphere. And because the outside world provides such little meaning for us, we start to demand much more meaning from our inner circle often more than any small set of people can really provide.” (199)
“Education helps students develop bonds to particular causes and crafts, ideas and institutions, communities and people. Duty and reverence, in other words, are forces that help us attach. To learn about the world is to take responsibility for it. ‘Knowledge means responsibility and responsibility means care.’ Knowledge implicates us: The more we know, the more responsible we are. To specialize in some area is to take responsibility for a corner of the world.” (206)
“The feeling, for many, is one of being uprooted. Lost is the sense that we live for our neighbors, our comrades, or our ancestors- that there is some larger story into which we are woven. All that's left is wellness and security: staying alive, seeking experience, and enjoying the ride.
Yet, ‘trees whose roots are almost entirely eaten away fall at the first blow.’ So we start grasping for quick and easy rootedness anywhere we can find it.
One way we do so is through nostalgia. If we cannot cultivate new cultures and practices- or sustain inherited cultures and practices- we grasp hold of the memories of times when our cultures felt more alive. Sometimes, nostalgia is goofy and innocuous while other forms of nostalgia are more consequential: politicians who run on reviving some idealized form of the past; community leaders who feel like their role is no longer to steward a living culture, but to ensure their culture never changes.
Worse still, nostalgia is often used to cover up a lack of living commitment in the present. A living commitment is like tending to a fire; nostalgia is like gathering around a fire's dying embers. It might be warm right now, but it won't be for long.
And perhaps the most dangerous trend stemming from our modern identity crisis is the practice of taking a tiny scrap of identity that remains after the flood and having an outsize relationship with it. Instead of it being one part of you, it becomes an idol and you feel a need to signal your devotion to it in dramatic ways.” (230)
May 10, 2022
Summary: I enjoyed hearing about the many different things committed people have accomplished, but I think this book would be more helpful for someone earlier in their search for the meaning commitment can provide.
I was interested in this book about choosing to make more commitments because I've found committing to more things quite satisfying. About five years ago, living in California, I finally decided to hang pictures on my walls. Last year, when I moved to Maryland, I finally decided to become involved in local politics. I'd never done either of those things before because I never expected to live in one place for very long. I'm glad to have finally to have just started doing the things I want to do where I live regardless of whether I end up staying. However, I think I would have gotten a lot more out of this book before I came to this realization on my own.
The main argument in this book is of two parts. One is the fairly obvious point that to accomplish most things that are worth doing, you're going to have to commit a lot of time and effort. The second point is less obvious, but a logical corollary to the first point - that committing to something will make you happier. I think the author does a good job of identifying the pros and cons of committing vs browsing. He also recognizes that both have their place.
For people just considering a commitment, I think the most helpful part of this book is the many examples of people who have committed to something. A lot of these examples are around social activism and I think these are the less useful examples. The author briefly acknowledges that most big change relies on the work of many people, but most of the stories still focus on a single hero. For someone considering getting involved in activism, I think A More Beautiful and Terrible History gives a much more helpful description of how an individual can do their small part to make change. On the other hand, I particularly appreciated that the author gave a wide variety of examples of possible commitments. I also liked that he treated commitment to things like developing a skill with the same respect he gave to potentially more altruistic goals, like activism. I think both types of commitment have their place!
For someone considering new commitments, I found this book to be lacking in specific advice. There was a bit of obvious advice about how to pick what to commit to. There was no advice on how to find groups to get involved with or how to start a group yourself. Personally, I found this part of commitment pretty daunting! To be fair to the book, I'm not sure I have much advice for finding groups to get involved with either, just to use meet-up, Google, and a local paper if you're lucky enough to have one. Once you find some groups you're interested in, they might then lead you to others.
Something that would have made this book more interesting to me, given that I'm already on board with making commitments, is some scientific studies on the topic. Sadly, this book has almost no citations except for in-text philosophical quotes. Something I would have preferred be left out was the author's thoughts on the role of commitment in society. I found these parts a bit of a stretch. For example, you can frame students doing activities only for their resumes as people being less committed than they used to be, but I'd argue that it actually reflects decreased class mobility and increased fear of precarity.
As someone looking for interesting science and specific advice about deepening commitments, this book wasn't what I was hoping for. If you or someone in your life is a twenty-something searching for a feeling of greater meaning in your life though, this just might be the book for you. I thought the author made a great argument for picking an area or two of your life in which to make a deeper commitment as a path to greater meaning and happiness.This review was originally posted on Doing Dewey
I was interested in this book about choosing to make more commitments because I've found committing to more things quite satisfying. About five years ago, living in California, I finally decided to hang pictures on my walls. Last year, when I moved to Maryland, I finally decided to become involved in local politics. I'd never done either of those things before because I never expected to live in one place for very long. I'm glad to have finally to have just started doing the things I want to do where I live regardless of whether I end up staying. However, I think I would have gotten a lot more out of this book before I came to this realization on my own.
The main argument in this book is of two parts. One is the fairly obvious point that to accomplish most things that are worth doing, you're going to have to commit a lot of time and effort. The second point is less obvious, but a logical corollary to the first point - that committing to something will make you happier. I think the author does a good job of identifying the pros and cons of committing vs browsing. He also recognizes that both have their place.
For people just considering a commitment, I think the most helpful part of this book is the many examples of people who have committed to something. A lot of these examples are around social activism and I think these are the less useful examples. The author briefly acknowledges that most big change relies on the work of many people, but most of the stories still focus on a single hero. For someone considering getting involved in activism, I think A More Beautiful and Terrible History gives a much more helpful description of how an individual can do their small part to make change. On the other hand, I particularly appreciated that the author gave a wide variety of examples of possible commitments. I also liked that he treated commitment to things like developing a skill with the same respect he gave to potentially more altruistic goals, like activism. I think both types of commitment have their place!
For someone considering new commitments, I found this book to be lacking in specific advice. There was a bit of obvious advice about how to pick what to commit to. There was no advice on how to find groups to get involved with or how to start a group yourself. Personally, I found this part of commitment pretty daunting! To be fair to the book, I'm not sure I have much advice for finding groups to get involved with either, just to use meet-up, Google, and a local paper if you're lucky enough to have one. Once you find some groups you're interested in, they might then lead you to others.
Something that would have made this book more interesting to me, given that I'm already on board with making commitments, is some scientific studies on the topic. Sadly, this book has almost no citations except for in-text philosophical quotes. Something I would have preferred be left out was the author's thoughts on the role of commitment in society. I found these parts a bit of a stretch. For example, you can frame students doing activities only for their resumes as people being less committed than they used to be, but I'd argue that it actually reflects decreased class mobility and increased fear of precarity.
As someone looking for interesting science and specific advice about deepening commitments, this book wasn't what I was hoping for. If you or someone in your life is a twenty-something searching for a feeling of greater meaning in your life though, this just might be the book for you. I thought the author made a great argument for picking an area or two of your life in which to make a deeper commitment as a path to greater meaning and happiness.This review was originally posted on Doing Dewey
June 23, 2024
I definitely recommend checking out the reviews here on GR for this book, because others have put my disconnected experience in way clearer terms than I feel I'm capable of. Especially today, on a near 100 degree summer afternoon when my brain is melting out my ears 🫠
Dedicated defines our current society (and I would say, western first world societies specifically) as one of liquid modernity, or an age of infinite browsing. As individuals, companies, generations, and cultures we have more choice than ever before. But a fear of commitment, of closing the door on choice by pursuing a long haul project/cause/art form/career means an endless cycle of pursuing the next best thing and ultimately, author Peter Davis would argue, a meaningless result.
The book does a nice job of explaining what Davis' Counterculture of Commitment is by giving multiple examples of "long haul heroes" who have impacted communities, politics, spirituality, and nature. Communities need those who will commit to causes, but also people and betterment as a whole, to keep those communities thriving.
Where I felt a disconnect, and I'm happy to see others write so eloquently about it too, is in questions about how we become long haul heroes in a society, especially in a workplace, that favors advancement over commitment to fostering specific skills. Modern society is built on getting faster, more efficient, more broad in our ambitions and experience.
I think we could all use more dedication in our lives, with time and attention committed to the people and causes that move us. But I also think that aim is in conflict with the expectations of the world today, and the question of how to operate in a world that doesn't share the same goal of commitment was hinted at but never really addressed.
Interesting book, good questions raised and it will definitely make you think in a different way. But I found myself left with more questions than answers. Maybe that's a good thing though. Commitment is such a personal experience, I guess we all have to figure out what it means for ourselves.
Dedicated defines our current society (and I would say, western first world societies specifically) as one of liquid modernity, or an age of infinite browsing. As individuals, companies, generations, and cultures we have more choice than ever before. But a fear of commitment, of closing the door on choice by pursuing a long haul project/cause/art form/career means an endless cycle of pursuing the next best thing and ultimately, author Peter Davis would argue, a meaningless result.
The book does a nice job of explaining what Davis' Counterculture of Commitment is by giving multiple examples of "long haul heroes" who have impacted communities, politics, spirituality, and nature. Communities need those who will commit to causes, but also people and betterment as a whole, to keep those communities thriving.
Where I felt a disconnect, and I'm happy to see others write so eloquently about it too, is in questions about how we become long haul heroes in a society, especially in a workplace, that favors advancement over commitment to fostering specific skills. Modern society is built on getting faster, more efficient, more broad in our ambitions and experience.
I think we could all use more dedication in our lives, with time and attention committed to the people and causes that move us. But I also think that aim is in conflict with the expectations of the world today, and the question of how to operate in a world that doesn't share the same goal of commitment was hinted at but never really addressed.
Interesting book, good questions raised and it will definitely make you think in a different way. But I found myself left with more questions than answers. Maybe that's a good thing though. Commitment is such a personal experience, I guess we all have to figure out what it means for ourselves.
May 1, 2024
This one is a HOT TAKE. I’m suspicious to buy in to the author’s argument completely, as there must be a healthy gray area, but this book gave me tons of food for thought. It makes me reconsider a life of infinite browsing, ♾️ options, doom scrolling, dating swipe culture, and the practice of always crafting an exit plan after committing to something, you know, just in case.
The author’s goal is to make sense of the tension between “infinite browsing mode” and the “counterculture of commitment.” He argues that commiting to things is a better practice overall, and is particularly passionate about being dedicated to the people/communities in our lives. “The benefits we receive from community are partially enforced by the hard edge of collective accountability. When people don’t fear disappointing their communities, if there are no consequences for breaking norms, failing to uphold our share of communal responsibility, or quitting, then communities can’t function… Without [collective] judgement, not the judgement of prejudice or casting stones, but the judgement of mutual communal accountability, we’d all be worse off. If a community’s norms are healthy and loving, this type of judgement can be a form of care. When someone says, ‘I didn’t see you at practice,’ part of what they are saying is ‘I care if you show up.’”
“Sustained engagement is the only way we can separate was is important from what isn’t.” Depth triumphs over novelty every single time, the author argues. If you long to make a significant impact in your one and only life, maybe some things are worth sticking with forever.
Final anecdote I’ll mention: the author argues that there’s a reason we will watch “White Christmas” and “The Godfather” for the next 50+ years and probably never see “Oppenheimer” again. In the words of the author: “If something has managed to last so long already, it will, on average, outlast that which hasn’t yet proven itself.”
The author’s goal is to make sense of the tension between “infinite browsing mode” and the “counterculture of commitment.” He argues that commiting to things is a better practice overall, and is particularly passionate about being dedicated to the people/communities in our lives. “The benefits we receive from community are partially enforced by the hard edge of collective accountability. When people don’t fear disappointing their communities, if there are no consequences for breaking norms, failing to uphold our share of communal responsibility, or quitting, then communities can’t function… Without [collective] judgement, not the judgement of prejudice or casting stones, but the judgement of mutual communal accountability, we’d all be worse off. If a community’s norms are healthy and loving, this type of judgement can be a form of care. When someone says, ‘I didn’t see you at practice,’ part of what they are saying is ‘I care if you show up.’”
“Sustained engagement is the only way we can separate was is important from what isn’t.” Depth triumphs over novelty every single time, the author argues. If you long to make a significant impact in your one and only life, maybe some things are worth sticking with forever.
Final anecdote I’ll mention: the author argues that there’s a reason we will watch “White Christmas” and “The Godfather” for the next 50+ years and probably never see “Oppenheimer” again. In the words of the author: “If something has managed to last so long already, it will, on average, outlast that which hasn’t yet proven itself.”
February 8, 2024
A very eye-opening book which values commitment and the long-haul heroes over infinite browsing and keeping your options open. It has inspired me to be more committed to things in my life, something I have been struggling with for a long time. Commitment is all about the depth of experience rather than the breadth.
"At its core, much of commitment is about taking control of our time. Death controls the length of our days, but we control the depth of our days. Commitment is about choosing to pursue, in the face of our limited length, boundless depth."
"Your partner isn't going to be like a new computer, with detailed specifications...Let go of all that and just let your heart figure it out."
"You can see the paradox of choice...in more significant situations too. When I was in college, I was friends with the Mormons on campus. Devout Mormons often feel called to date only fellow Mormons, which meant my friends were choosing from about 30 people in the area instead of thousands like the rest of us. I thought at first that they must feel limited by this, but was surprised to learn that most didn't. Instead, they processed dating differently than their secular friends did. They weren't looking for the absolute perfect match...they tended to give each other more of a chance, avoiding 'the grass is always greener' trap. They reasoned that relationships mostly work because of a couple's commitment to each other and a few shared values."
"At its core, much of commitment is about taking control of our time. Death controls the length of our days, but we control the depth of our days. Commitment is about choosing to pursue, in the face of our limited length, boundless depth."
"Your partner isn't going to be like a new computer, with detailed specifications...Let go of all that and just let your heart figure it out."
"You can see the paradox of choice...in more significant situations too. When I was in college, I was friends with the Mormons on campus. Devout Mormons often feel called to date only fellow Mormons, which meant my friends were choosing from about 30 people in the area instead of thousands like the rest of us. I thought at first that they must feel limited by this, but was surprised to learn that most didn't. Instead, they processed dating differently than their secular friends did. They weren't looking for the absolute perfect match...they tended to give each other more of a chance, avoiding 'the grass is always greener' trap. They reasoned that relationships mostly work because of a couple's commitment to each other and a few shared values."
June 7, 2021
Dedicated was refreshing, and I haven't read a book like this before.
You've probably had this experience: It's late at night, and you start browsing Netflix, looking for something to watch. You scroll through different titles, you watch a couple of trailers, you even read a few reviews—but you just can't commit to watching any given movie. Suddenly it's been thirty minutes, and you're still stuck in Infinite Browsing Mode, so you just give up. In Dedicated, Davis talks about the defining characteristic of our generation, 'keeping our options open.'
The book discusses some concerns for how we get stuck and how we can't be committers, and it talks about the three fears that account for this:
1. Fear of regret: we worry that if we commit to something, we will later regret having not committed to something else.
2. Fear of association: we think that if we commit to something, we will be vulnerable to the chaos that that commitment brings to our identity, our reputation, and our sense of control.
3. Fear of missing out: we feel that if we commit to something, the responsibilities that come with it will prevent us from being everything, everywhere, to everyone.
There are some eye-opening points on how we need to stop making comparisons in our lives and focus on our commitments and make them work, even when things get complicated. The book was good, but sometimes I did forget that the book was about commitment and dedication.
You've probably had this experience: It's late at night, and you start browsing Netflix, looking for something to watch. You scroll through different titles, you watch a couple of trailers, you even read a few reviews—but you just can't commit to watching any given movie. Suddenly it's been thirty minutes, and you're still stuck in Infinite Browsing Mode, so you just give up. In Dedicated, Davis talks about the defining characteristic of our generation, 'keeping our options open.'
The book discusses some concerns for how we get stuck and how we can't be committers, and it talks about the three fears that account for this:
1. Fear of regret: we worry that if we commit to something, we will later regret having not committed to something else.
2. Fear of association: we think that if we commit to something, we will be vulnerable to the chaos that that commitment brings to our identity, our reputation, and our sense of control.
3. Fear of missing out: we feel that if we commit to something, the responsibilities that come with it will prevent us from being everything, everywhere, to everyone.
There are some eye-opening points on how we need to stop making comparisons in our lives and focus on our commitments and make them work, even when things get complicated. The book was good, but sometimes I did forget that the book was about commitment and dedication.
June 12, 2021
Very interesting book about our lives in the modern age. How we are presented with many options that we never take the time to dedicate ourselves to one thing.
A few decades ago, people didn't have many options as we do today. If you grew up in a household that works in a specific field, you would most likely follow the same field and dedicate your life to it. Now people have more options. And we like to keep these options open. Our school major keeps options open for our first job. Our first job keeps options for the second and so on. You might have an interest in working in one field but you might fear not being able to leave it once you're in it. This book shows what you miss out on when you keep your options open and don't focus on one thing.
And this applies to anything whether it's a job, hobby, or in selecting a partner. We like to browse social media endlessly but that doesn't give us meaning or value. A thread on Twitter on one topic is nothing compared to a book or a documentary on the same topic. Reading a book and forgetting about it is not the same as reading it, discussing it with people, then rereading it a year later. This is obviously not rocket science but we tend to forget it.
A few decades ago, people didn't have many options as we do today. If you grew up in a household that works in a specific field, you would most likely follow the same field and dedicate your life to it. Now people have more options. And we like to keep these options open. Our school major keeps options open for our first job. Our first job keeps options for the second and so on. You might have an interest in working in one field but you might fear not being able to leave it once you're in it. This book shows what you miss out on when you keep your options open and don't focus on one thing.
And this applies to anything whether it's a job, hobby, or in selecting a partner. We like to browse social media endlessly but that doesn't give us meaning or value. A thread on Twitter on one topic is nothing compared to a book or a documentary on the same topic. Reading a book and forgetting about it is not the same as reading it, discussing it with people, then rereading it a year later. This is obviously not rocket science but we tend to forget it.
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