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Social Justice Parenting: How to Raise Compassionate, Anti-Racist, Justice-Minded Kids in an Unjust World – An Empowering Guide to Diversity, Activism, and Meaningful Change
“Social Justice Parenting offers guidance and grace for parents who want to teach their children how to create a fair and inclusive world.”—Diane Debrovner, deputy editor of Parents magazine
“Replete with excellent examples and advice that can help parents raise children with a healthy self-image and regard for the welfare of others."—Jane E. Brody, New York Times
An empowering, timely guide to raising anti-racist, compassionate, and socially conscious children, from a diversity and inclusion educator with more than thirty years of experience.
As a global pandemic shuttered schools across the country in 2020, parents found themselves thrust into the role of teacher—in more ways than one. Not only did they take on remote school supervision, but after the murder of George Floyd and the ensuing Black Lives Matter protests, many also grappled with the responsibility to teach their kids about social justice—with few resources to guide them.
Now, in Social Justice Parenting, Dr. Traci Baxley—a professor of education who has spent 30 years teaching diversity and inclusion—will offer the essential guidance and curriculum parents have been searching for. Dr. Baxley, a mother of five herself, suggests that parenting is a form of activism, and encourages parents to acknowledge their influence in developing compassionate, socially-conscious kids.
Importantly, Dr. Baxley also guides parents to do the work of recognizing and reconciling their own biases. So often, she suggests, parents make choices based on what’s best for their children, versus what’s best for all children in their community. Dr. Baxley helps readers take inventory of their actions and beliefs, develop self-awareness and accountability, and become role models. Poised to become essential reading for all parents committed to social change, Social Justice Parenting will offer parents everywhere the opportunity to nurture a future generation of humane, compassionate individuals.
“Replete with excellent examples and advice that can help parents raise children with a healthy self-image and regard for the welfare of others."—Jane E. Brody, New York Times
An empowering, timely guide to raising anti-racist, compassionate, and socially conscious children, from a diversity and inclusion educator with more than thirty years of experience.
As a global pandemic shuttered schools across the country in 2020, parents found themselves thrust into the role of teacher—in more ways than one. Not only did they take on remote school supervision, but after the murder of George Floyd and the ensuing Black Lives Matter protests, many also grappled with the responsibility to teach their kids about social justice—with few resources to guide them.
Now, in Social Justice Parenting, Dr. Traci Baxley—a professor of education who has spent 30 years teaching diversity and inclusion—will offer the essential guidance and curriculum parents have been searching for. Dr. Baxley, a mother of five herself, suggests that parenting is a form of activism, and encourages parents to acknowledge their influence in developing compassionate, socially-conscious kids.
Importantly, Dr. Baxley also guides parents to do the work of recognizing and reconciling their own biases. So often, she suggests, parents make choices based on what’s best for their children, versus what’s best for all children in their community. Dr. Baxley helps readers take inventory of their actions and beliefs, develop self-awareness and accountability, and become role models. Poised to become essential reading for all parents committed to social change, Social Justice Parenting will offer parents everywhere the opportunity to nurture a future generation of humane, compassionate individuals.
261 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 19, 2021
116 people are currently reading
2002 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 113 reviews
November 30, 2021
Highlighted every page. This is the book I've been waiting for.
February 9, 2023
A necessary read for all parents, especially those who want to raise their children to be better, kinder, Antiracist people. I’ll be re-listening to parts of this with my child, and will refer back to it constantly. Great tips and ideas in there to incorporate on your journey!
October 23, 2022
Not quite what I was looking for, too introductory and not as practical as I expected.
November 30, 2021
Dr. Baxley is a 30-year veteran in education who focuses on diversity and inclusion. Parenting books almost always target individual parenting, but this book expands child-rearing into a community effort. Dr. Baxley talks about the Platinum Rule (as opposed to the Golden Rule): "treat others not as you wish to be treated, but as THEY wish to be treated." When parents teach their children about inequality at home, those children move out into a world where they can be the difference in each other’s lives.
Dr. Baxley’s book opened my eyes to how subtle racial disparities can be. That inspired me to take a closer look at how my children are educated at home. I’m a mother of four kids who are exposed to a broader world I can’t control. They have their own relationships at school, with other kids, and with adults. This book made me look deep into my children’s lives to see how they can carry understanding and compassion into the world as they get older. This book provides actionable steps and a guided curriculum for anyone looking to better themselves and the lives of children.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at: https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/dr-...
Dr. Baxley’s book opened my eyes to how subtle racial disparities can be. That inspired me to take a closer look at how my children are educated at home. I’m a mother of four kids who are exposed to a broader world I can’t control. They have their own relationships at school, with other kids, and with adults. This book made me look deep into my children’s lives to see how they can carry understanding and compassion into the world as they get older. This book provides actionable steps and a guided curriculum for anyone looking to better themselves and the lives of children.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at: https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/dr-...
January 26, 2025
I don’t know how to rate this, because it’s a wonderful book with a lot of great tips and strategies to start encouraging social justice in our children. I feel like my only critique is it doesn’t really take into account children who are not neurotypical. Besides that, I think it’s a great introductory book into social justice for families, and I will be looking into more books on the topic.
September 19, 2023
NOT PREGNANT!
Thinking about having a family in 5 years, so naturally I want to start preparing now. I loved this book. A lot of it is applicable to my work too and my internal voice. Will definitely reread and highly recommend to any caregiver or people looking to be parents.
Thinking about having a family in 5 years, so naturally I want to start preparing now. I loved this book. A lot of it is applicable to my work too and my internal voice. Will definitely reread and highly recommend to any caregiver or people looking to be parents.
February 28, 2025
Such a wonderfully written, easily attainable parenting book. In times when everything feels helpless this book was a ray of light. HIGHLY recommend to every parent who wants to teach their little people how to be aware of the world and to respond with love and compassion to those around them.
September 6, 2025
I really enjoyed this book and I feel like it would be really good for people who literally have no clue where to start when it comes to building family habits around social justice practices. However. I didn’t find it super duper revolutionary? A lot of the suggestions are things I find myself doing already. Which made it feel like a pat on the back rather than something that was helping me learn more. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it was still super good and I’d highly recommend!
December 31, 2022
I really loved reading this book. After engaging with a variety of anti racist texts from a parenting perspective over the recent years, I found this text to provide anchoring in real world applications which I greatly appreciate as a mom of young children. Dr. Baxley provides a lens of parenting with radical love, compassion, and kindness as the foundation. I think that her voice would appeal to many readers of all backgrounds/belief systems, and I think she is skilled at finding a common ground and inspiring hope amidst a wildly fractured social-political context in the US these days.
She encourages families to be specifically rooted in core values and she guides readers through how to actually make this happen by getting to know our children with meal time questions, check ins, and more. Her writing can come off as self congratulatory as others have mentioned, but having heard her speak about this book in an intimate book club setting, I can confidently say she is sharing what has worked for her from a generous place of loving and wanting to help fellow parents with what she knows worked for her. The goals of her parenting center on self reflection first and then seeing our children as individuals and building our families support around those individuals’ uniqueness. I appreciated the prompts to stop and reflect and slow down to write answers to her questions in the space provided (and I’m already eager to see how those answers change in future rereads). The social justice pieces follow as it is imperative to be centered on authentic connections and respect in order to prioritize social justice. By modeling these values to our kids (especially in the manner of her frequent think alouds in this text), we can raise children who engage in anti racist work and build relationships that are meaningful and positive. Her persuasive appeal is genuine and relatable as she write about the impact on her biracial children and all our children.
There are some basic points made that may feel too simple to some readers, but those help this text read easily. There was also some unfortunate audience exclusion as she directs this book towards a mother reader, but overall, the good far outweighed the bad. Social Justice Parenting is full of directly applicable parenting tips and resources (ie huge book list in back) that are rooted in spreading love.
She encourages families to be specifically rooted in core values and she guides readers through how to actually make this happen by getting to know our children with meal time questions, check ins, and more. Her writing can come off as self congratulatory as others have mentioned, but having heard her speak about this book in an intimate book club setting, I can confidently say she is sharing what has worked for her from a generous place of loving and wanting to help fellow parents with what she knows worked for her. The goals of her parenting center on self reflection first and then seeing our children as individuals and building our families support around those individuals’ uniqueness. I appreciated the prompts to stop and reflect and slow down to write answers to her questions in the space provided (and I’m already eager to see how those answers change in future rereads). The social justice pieces follow as it is imperative to be centered on authentic connections and respect in order to prioritize social justice. By modeling these values to our kids (especially in the manner of her frequent think alouds in this text), we can raise children who engage in anti racist work and build relationships that are meaningful and positive. Her persuasive appeal is genuine and relatable as she write about the impact on her biracial children and all our children.
There are some basic points made that may feel too simple to some readers, but those help this text read easily. There was also some unfortunate audience exclusion as she directs this book towards a mother reader, but overall, the good far outweighed the bad. Social Justice Parenting is full of directly applicable parenting tips and resources (ie huge book list in back) that are rooted in spreading love.
October 11, 2021
When I received and early copy of this book, I had no clue what to expect. When you see words like “social justice” in the title, there’s a possibility that it’s going to be filled with some extreme views. Fortunately, that wasn’t the case at all with this book from Baxley. This is honestly one of my favorite parenting books that I’ve ever read. In this book, you learn the importance of your children’s mental health, how to help them advocate for themselves, and when to speak up for people. Most importantly, the book teaches us how to stop parenting from a place of fear and how to have difficult conversations with our children. But I think the best part of this book is that there isn’t a single part where the book comes off “preachy”. The book is about self-reflection, compassion, and conversation, which are extremely important aspects of parenting. This is a book that I hope every parent reads because it’s for more than just a book about social justice. The parenting advice in this book is indispensable.
January 21, 2022
I rarely write reviews but I felt somewhat compelled to because of how disappointing this book ended up being. I saw this book recommended in the New York Times and I was pretty excited for a book like this to exist, but I ended up being let down.
I was disappointed in the writing style. Dr. Traci Baxley and her editor wrote in a style best suited for a blog entry, rather than a book (in my opinion).
I also thought that Dr. Traci Baxley and her husband come across as below-average parents, despite being qualified to write on this subject. Overprotective, not very mindful before reacting, and also "tiger mom" levels of expectations on their kids. It's like thinking that a professional weightlifter that has had three shoulder surgeries would be the best person to inform you of the right methods to keep your shoulders healthy - I would rather learn from someone who is a professional lifter and has NEVER had a shoulder issue, because whatever they are doing clearly works!
Lastly, as a Dad trying to read this book, I found it a little irritating that she was so "pro-mom". This was definitely my own biases coming through as I know she had a tiny statement about how "dads are cool too", but it was very much a "dads are cool, BUT..." and then mom-power the rest of the way.
Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the book but I can't see how it's a 5-star product, much less one to be suggested by the New York Times.
I was disappointed in the writing style. Dr. Traci Baxley and her editor wrote in a style best suited for a blog entry, rather than a book (in my opinion).
I also thought that Dr. Traci Baxley and her husband come across as below-average parents, despite being qualified to write on this subject. Overprotective, not very mindful before reacting, and also "tiger mom" levels of expectations on their kids. It's like thinking that a professional weightlifter that has had three shoulder surgeries would be the best person to inform you of the right methods to keep your shoulders healthy - I would rather learn from someone who is a professional lifter and has NEVER had a shoulder issue, because whatever they are doing clearly works!
Lastly, as a Dad trying to read this book, I found it a little irritating that she was so "pro-mom". This was definitely my own biases coming through as I know she had a tiny statement about how "dads are cool too", but it was very much a "dads are cool, BUT..." and then mom-power the rest of the way.
Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the book but I can't see how it's a 5-star product, much less one to be suggested by the New York Times.
April 19, 2022
I read this book for a philosophy class and as someone who isn't a parent/doesn't intend on becoming one, so obviously I am not the target audience for Dr. Baxley's book. Coming from this perspective, I thought the book gave some really fruitful advice that parents could actually implement into their relationships with their children, however, there are some things I take big issues with.
My first critique of the book is that "radical love," reads exactly like MLK's concept of agape, which Baxley neglects to address at all. In fact, though she references radical love throughout the book as her basis, she does little to actually introduce what the concept means. I have no doubts that Dr. Baxley is extremely educated, but it is a bit disappointing to me that she excludes King altogether, mainly because there has been plenty of work done in response to his philosophy. Well-developed additions, defenses, and critiques exist that I think could've added some great complexity to this book;.
My second critique of this book is that it doesn't address any "hard" cases. Of course it is easy to respond using radical love when instances of racism or other forms of injustice arise from misunderstandings. We should respond to children with empathy and patient explanation because they're children! However, it leaves me wondering if Baxley would stand by this approach in tougher cases. It's difficult to recommend radical love to a child who's being ruthlessly bullied. Furthermore, Baxley encourages parents to model radical love for their children - but is there any line to who we should extend it to? I wonder if she believes in approaching all people, even those who are hateful, with this philosophy.
Again, I want to give Baxley credit where she deserves it and say that I think the book is probably really great for it's audiences! But I do find the book to be lacking in the areas mentioned above and wish she had spent a bit more time developing the theory she relies so heavily on.
My first critique of the book is that "radical love," reads exactly like MLK's concept of agape, which Baxley neglects to address at all. In fact, though she references radical love throughout the book as her basis, she does little to actually introduce what the concept means. I have no doubts that Dr. Baxley is extremely educated, but it is a bit disappointing to me that she excludes King altogether, mainly because there has been plenty of work done in response to his philosophy. Well-developed additions, defenses, and critiques exist that I think could've added some great complexity to this book;.
My second critique of this book is that it doesn't address any "hard" cases. Of course it is easy to respond using radical love when instances of racism or other forms of injustice arise from misunderstandings. We should respond to children with empathy and patient explanation because they're children! However, it leaves me wondering if Baxley would stand by this approach in tougher cases. It's difficult to recommend radical love to a child who's being ruthlessly bullied. Furthermore, Baxley encourages parents to model radical love for their children - but is there any line to who we should extend it to? I wonder if she believes in approaching all people, even those who are hateful, with this philosophy.
Again, I want to give Baxley credit where she deserves it and say that I think the book is probably really great for it's audiences! But I do find the book to be lacking in the areas mentioned above and wish she had spent a bit more time developing the theory she relies so heavily on.
May 15, 2022
This was a great book to get started. It was especially helpful to hear anecdotes from the author as to how she thinks through certain parenting situations and opportunities. I liked the author's personality and openness throughout the book.
This was better through the rest of the book, but the introduction was heavily "mom" focused and not "parent" focused.
I was hoping for a few more hands-on recommendations for different age groups of kids, and didn't totally get that from the book, BUT there is an excellent list of books to read with your kids by age group at the end, and I plan to follow that list with my kids to be more deliberate about keeping a social justice dialogue in our house.
This was better through the rest of the book, but the introduction was heavily "mom" focused and not "parent" focused.
I was hoping for a few more hands-on recommendations for different age groups of kids, and didn't totally get that from the book, BUT there is an excellent list of books to read with your kids by age group at the end, and I plan to follow that list with my kids to be more deliberate about keeping a social justice dialogue in our house.
June 25, 2023
4.5 ⭐️
An incredible resource of intentional parenting to raise children who are able to see the world as it is and make meaning change.
There is a workbook that goes along with the book to allow for self reflection of your core values.
Many great examples of personal experience as an educator and mother and how to include the intentional social justice parenting from an intersectional view point.
The one issue is that this book focuses on tone being calm so you’re approachable. As this is geared women, the white woman audiance may take this as approval to tone police Black people.
Overall, this book works to instill the importance of self advocacy, social justice, and compassion for others as well as one’s self.
An incredible resource of intentional parenting to raise children who are able to see the world as it is and make meaning change.
There is a workbook that goes along with the book to allow for self reflection of your core values.
Many great examples of personal experience as an educator and mother and how to include the intentional social justice parenting from an intersectional view point.
The one issue is that this book focuses on tone being calm so you’re approachable. As this is geared women, the white woman audiance may take this as approval to tone police Black people.
Overall, this book works to instill the importance of self advocacy, social justice, and compassion for others as well as one’s self.
November 10, 2021
This book was a random audiobook that just happened to be available from my library. Ooooh boy. I feel like the author wrote this book as a way to humble brag about everything she does with her kids— the daily question on the white board, the money given to unhoused people, the safe space talks at the dinner table. All great things but to listen to 7 hours of her basically patting herself on the back?? It was too much. This book was more of a therapy and how to be a good parent book than it was about social justice. There were maybe 5 minutes of social justice discussion… unless the rest of the chapters really are how to be a social justice parent and I’m just already doing everything right?! I find that hard to believe.
Save yourself the time and just be nice to your kids and teach them to be nice to others. Boom.
Save yourself the time and just be nice to your kids and teach them to be nice to others. Boom.
April 11, 2022
I loved this book. Practical ways to make a great social impact. Out of all the parenting books I’ve read over the last 9 years (and boy have there been a LOT!), this one is the best. Because there are a million different ways to swaddle, potty train, teach to read, but this one focuses on actually raising good humans. And THAT is the greatest responsibility for us as parents.
December 15, 2021
Trust me you want to own this book. Borrowing it is simply not enough! You'll want to highlight and make notes and reference it often in patenting and teaching!
December 29, 2021
An excellent and accessible guide to parenting in a radically loving, active, and dialogic way. A little “mom” focused, but absolutely all of the advice applied and would be of use to all parents.
February 6, 2023
Beautifully written. Very practical advice with personal stories and motivation to do the challenging work. My favorite quote was that “Parenting is activism”!
November 6, 2021
“𝕀 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕜 𝕠𝕟𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕨𝕖 𝕔𝕒𝕟 𝕒𝕝𝕝 𝕒𝕘𝕣𝕖𝕖 𝕚𝕟 𝕚𝕤 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕨𝕖 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕥𝕠 𝕝𝕖𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕝𝕕 𝕚𝕟 𝕓𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕤𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕟 𝕨𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕨𝕖 𝕘𝕠𝕥 𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕖. 𝕊𝕠𝕔𝕚𝕒𝕝 𝕁𝕦𝕤𝕥𝕚𝕔𝕖 ℙ𝕒𝕣𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕚𝕤 𝕞𝕪 𝕨𝕒𝕪 𝕠𝕗 𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕚𝕓𝕦𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕠 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕔𝕒𝕦𝕤𝕖.”
Dr. Baxley gives us specific and strategic ways to approach making this world better. From charts that outline passions and activism toward those passions, to specific books for each age group that can help facilitate important conversations.
A powerful read that I can easily recommend to any parent looking for helpful ideas in how to raise compassionate little humans.
Dr. Baxley gives us specific and strategic ways to approach making this world better. From charts that outline passions and activism toward those passions, to specific books for each age group that can help facilitate important conversations.
A powerful read that I can easily recommend to any parent looking for helpful ideas in how to raise compassionate little humans.
November 18, 2021
Not a parent but I thought this might be interesting from the perspective of someone working with kids. Definitely some interesting ideas and good tips/principles for how to interact and engage in meaningful conversations!
November 11, 2021
This book had so much potential. Unfortunately, it focused on two differing viewpoints.
Viewpoint one was about raising kids in an unjust world in which many feel as if they don't belong. Concerning this her thoughts and advice about treating each child and an individual with unique interests and gifts are insightful and uplifting. The rocks she builds this viewpoint on are reflection, openness, compassion, kindness, and social engagement. At it's best, the book focuses on a nurturing home and honoring the individual child while instilling kindness, fairness, and being a blessing to others. Baxley should have stopped with this practical and purposeful guidance to be kind to your kids and teach them to be kind individuals.
Sadly, the first viewpoint is muddled with the anti-racism ideological activism as if this is all that is unjust in this world as if it was the only way a person could be marginalized. The author continually pats herself on the back as she labels her children as black throughout the book as if this group identification was the child's only defining characteristic. The author does not get extreme, but needs to take her own advice here to own her own junk. Overall a mixed bag.
Viewpoint one was about raising kids in an unjust world in which many feel as if they don't belong. Concerning this her thoughts and advice about treating each child and an individual with unique interests and gifts are insightful and uplifting. The rocks she builds this viewpoint on are reflection, openness, compassion, kindness, and social engagement. At it's best, the book focuses on a nurturing home and honoring the individual child while instilling kindness, fairness, and being a blessing to others. Baxley should have stopped with this practical and purposeful guidance to be kind to your kids and teach them to be kind individuals.
Sadly, the first viewpoint is muddled with the anti-racism ideological activism as if this is all that is unjust in this world as if it was the only way a person could be marginalized. The author continually pats herself on the back as she labels her children as black throughout the book as if this group identification was the child's only defining characteristic. The author does not get extreme, but needs to take her own advice here to own her own junk. Overall a mixed bag.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 5, 2022
Well, the overarching goal of the book is good, raise thoughtful, compassionate children into thoughtful, compassionate adults. However, it falls into various problems throughout. Step one, she presents a false dichotomy: either you parent from a place of fear or you parent with radical love. There are a host of problems there. Fear and love are not opposites. She also models and teaches her children to fear. Fear the police, fear racists/racism, fear the system. She’s teaching and modeling fear, but saying that you’re either parenting from fear or radical love!?
One of the other problems is making everything about race or at least mostly about race. She blasts “colorblindness” as all the books I’ve read about racism do. But, it seems odd that people who embrace the phrases that Martin Luther King Jr. used in his “I Have a Dream” speech, are lambasted as racist. We *should* judge people based on their color otherwise we’re “colorblind” and that’s racist. I suppose these anti-racists would say you should judge people by their color as long as you’re judging them as you’re ruling unfairly in their favor. Like Affirmative Action we *should* judge people by their color by giving them an advantage over others that have better grades or qualifications. We *should* judge people by their color as long as we rule more heavily in their favor. Racism is pure evil and we should all do what we can to oppose it. And that is one thing she does get right. The best way to eradicate racism is in individuals and those individuals opposing the very idea that one’s color has any bearing on one’s worth.
One last criticism. She embraces a kind of relativism, saying that you should develop your own “why.” Your own foundational idea for your family. But, that kind of thinking ignores that there are most certainly people out there who would, if they were to take the advice of this book make their family goal something racist. It’s all well and good if you espouse relativism that is more or less in line with what you believe, but what about the racist that would make it his/her family goal to eradicate people of color or subjugate or oppress them!? Should the racist lead his/her family to take up this social justice banner and fight *for* racism!? If you accept that kind of relativism, you’d have to accept that kind of social justice parenting. Even taking a less extreme position … she talks about and even encourages embracing people who have some kind of sexual deviancy (LGBTQ+). There are large numbers of people who think they are sinning in those actions. My personal belief is that the Bible clearly teaches those things as sin, should I pick up the banner of social justice *against* LGBTQ ideology!? She mentioned Chick-fil-A and their support of “anti-homosexual” ministries. One, that’s a mischaracterization and two, I supported (and still support) Chick-fil-A throughout the boycotts a few years ago. I disagreed with the boycotting and think they’re wrong on many levels, so this book is both opposing me, because she supported the boycott or at least the results, but the book is also supporting me because it says I should teach my children to support and work towards our family’s foundational beliefs.
One of the other problems is making everything about race or at least mostly about race. She blasts “colorblindness” as all the books I’ve read about racism do. But, it seems odd that people who embrace the phrases that Martin Luther King Jr. used in his “I Have a Dream” speech, are lambasted as racist. We *should* judge people based on their color otherwise we’re “colorblind” and that’s racist. I suppose these anti-racists would say you should judge people by their color as long as you’re judging them as you’re ruling unfairly in their favor. Like Affirmative Action we *should* judge people by their color by giving them an advantage over others that have better grades or qualifications. We *should* judge people by their color as long as we rule more heavily in their favor. Racism is pure evil and we should all do what we can to oppose it. And that is one thing she does get right. The best way to eradicate racism is in individuals and those individuals opposing the very idea that one’s color has any bearing on one’s worth.
One last criticism. She embraces a kind of relativism, saying that you should develop your own “why.” Your own foundational idea for your family. But, that kind of thinking ignores that there are most certainly people out there who would, if they were to take the advice of this book make their family goal something racist. It’s all well and good if you espouse relativism that is more or less in line with what you believe, but what about the racist that would make it his/her family goal to eradicate people of color or subjugate or oppress them!? Should the racist lead his/her family to take up this social justice banner and fight *for* racism!? If you accept that kind of relativism, you’d have to accept that kind of social justice parenting. Even taking a less extreme position … she talks about and even encourages embracing people who have some kind of sexual deviancy (LGBTQ+). There are large numbers of people who think they are sinning in those actions. My personal belief is that the Bible clearly teaches those things as sin, should I pick up the banner of social justice *against* LGBTQ ideology!? She mentioned Chick-fil-A and their support of “anti-homosexual” ministries. One, that’s a mischaracterization and two, I supported (and still support) Chick-fil-A throughout the boycotts a few years ago. I disagreed with the boycotting and think they’re wrong on many levels, so this book is both opposing me, because she supported the boycott or at least the results, but the book is also supporting me because it says I should teach my children to support and work towards our family’s foundational beliefs.
March 26, 2023
i really appreciated the specific tools and additional resources section, particularly with how to frame things to younger kids. unfortunately i was really disappointed with the way this social justice book was going to be read exclusively by white moms (with one line acknowledging dads are important too!) while i’m sure the author agrees with me based on our “conversations” in this book, it’s important for people of all races to be learning how to effectively pass down activism, and by not writing with dads equally in mind we’re almost giving them a pass to not engage.
January 1, 2024
REALLY GOOD. Wish I could have read it when my kids were young. Wish it would have a different title. There is SO much more there than social justice. Many of her ideas and examples can be applied outside the social justice realm.
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June 26, 2022Overall, this is a good text full of really helpful and practical suggestions for more thoughtful justice-centered parenting. I enjoyed plenty of it, shed a handful of tears (both from affirming what I am doing to benefit my kiddo… and what I’m not), and added to my parenting tool belt a bit more. Dr Baxley does a nice job of balancing suggestions for parents that are internal (self-work) and external (interactions/advocacy for kiddos). The end of the book has a extensive list of books/resources for kids by grade level. The list is worth the price of admission alone.
This text is clearly written for, very specially, white cishet moms who are pretty new to the justice game. So, it’s not surprising that there were quite a few things that were SUPER cringy. Aaannnndddd, as someone engaged in critcal scholarhip, I know we can’t get it all right and we are forever learning and growing, so I offer the following cringy lines/sections as on offering for growing:
- when sharing a story ab talking to her kids ab abuse, she tells them (the kids) that they should tell her even if it’s their dad- then she winks/gestures at Dad. Totes understand the intent AND it felt really dismissive of the thousands of kids that experience parental abuse AND how gross must that have felt for dad?
- Speaking of Dad, either Mom is doing the most so dad doesn’t have to or he just doesn’t want to. She talks ab having to do everything bc kids would never call dad - ewwwwww. I mean, maybe this is how TheStraights™️ do things, but ewwwww. And Dr Baxley (mom) is Black and dad is white, so even more of a power dynamic based on social identities makes it all the more ick.
- She talks ab runs to Hobby Lobby for her kids. Ewwww again (Hobby Lobby hates the gays as much as the Lords Chicken. Speaking of the Lords Chicken she says that they no longer donate to anti-LGBT causes. Untrue.)
- She shares an activity in her college classroom where she has a basket of buttons labeled one of four identities - straight, gay, non-conforming, lgbtq ally. She gives them out at the beginning of a class but students can’t see what they are wearing. Then at the end of class she asks the students if they want to keep them and wear them around campus. No. No no no no no. So much wrong with this. 1) These identities are not mutually exclusive. 2) the straights wearing a pin that says gays? Think ab all the ignorant shit that they could do with that. 3) wearing an ally pin (saying you are a “safe” person for queer people when you aren’t? HARMFUL). I understand the intent of this activity, but naw, this one needs to die a quick death.
- This line. There is so much wrong with it that I just can’t. “I’ll watch my son offer to play with the trans kid on the playground, or extend a hand to help the differently abled child.”
- Attributed this quote “the arc of the moral universe is long” to Obama. 😒
This text is clearly written for, very specially, white cishet moms who are pretty new to the justice game. So, it’s not surprising that there were quite a few things that were SUPER cringy. Aaannnndddd, as someone engaged in critcal scholarhip, I know we can’t get it all right and we are forever learning and growing, so I offer the following cringy lines/sections as on offering for growing:
- when sharing a story ab talking to her kids ab abuse, she tells them (the kids) that they should tell her even if it’s their dad- then she winks/gestures at Dad. Totes understand the intent AND it felt really dismissive of the thousands of kids that experience parental abuse AND how gross must that have felt for dad?
- Speaking of Dad, either Mom is doing the most so dad doesn’t have to or he just doesn’t want to. She talks ab having to do everything bc kids would never call dad - ewwwwww. I mean, maybe this is how TheStraights™️ do things, but ewwwww. And Dr Baxley (mom) is Black and dad is white, so even more of a power dynamic based on social identities makes it all the more ick.
- She talks ab runs to Hobby Lobby for her kids. Ewwww again (Hobby Lobby hates the gays as much as the Lords Chicken. Speaking of the Lords Chicken she says that they no longer donate to anti-LGBT causes. Untrue.)
- She shares an activity in her college classroom where she has a basket of buttons labeled one of four identities - straight, gay, non-conforming, lgbtq ally. She gives them out at the beginning of a class but students can’t see what they are wearing. Then at the end of class she asks the students if they want to keep them and wear them around campus. No. No no no no no. So much wrong with this. 1) These identities are not mutually exclusive. 2) the straights wearing a pin that says gays? Think ab all the ignorant shit that they could do with that. 3) wearing an ally pin (saying you are a “safe” person for queer people when you aren’t? HARMFUL). I understand the intent of this activity, but naw, this one needs to die a quick death.
- This line. There is so much wrong with it that I just can’t. “I’ll watch my son offer to play with the trans kid on the playground, or extend a hand to help the differently abled child.”
- Attributed this quote “the arc of the moral universe is long” to Obama. 😒
February 11, 2023
This isn't just a good book on social justice parenting. It is a good book on parenting. Period. Maybe that is because we can't be doing a good job as parents unless we are thinking about how our parenting will impact the world. I was especially challenged by Baxley's declaration that if we are parenting from fear we cannot be strong allies. Particularly coming out of a pandemic and with so many possibilities for further panic, this is much to ask of us and still essential.
One of the most powerful stories in this book involved getting some fast food. The person behind them was honking their horn because it was taking them so long to order. So Baxley paid for their meal and the person behind them. Her children were shocked and asked her why she had done something nice to someone who was being so mean. Baxley said that we should always choose to see the good in others. Afterwards, the woman pulled up beside them at an intersection and yelled out, "God bless. I was trying to get lunch for my son and only had $3." Now, I don't think this means that we should allow people to trod all over us. But it was a powerful example of being generous even to people we don't necessarily have reason to feel generous towards.
One of the most powerful stories in this book involved getting some fast food. The person behind them was honking their horn because it was taking them so long to order. So Baxley paid for their meal and the person behind them. Her children were shocked and asked her why she had done something nice to someone who was being so mean. Baxley said that we should always choose to see the good in others. Afterwards, the woman pulled up beside them at an intersection and yelled out, "God bless. I was trying to get lunch for my son and only had $3." Now, I don't think this means that we should allow people to trod all over us. But it was a powerful example of being generous even to people we don't necessarily have reason to feel generous towards.
February 17, 2022
I was not impressed by this for a few reasons:
1. This is VERY mom-oriented. Obviously moms tend to be the ones that read parenting books, but this one must be pretty alienating for dads to read.
2. It was barely about social justice and much more about Dr. Baxley's parenting style and philosophy. I was at least halfway through before she even really got to anything social justice-related.
3. Her suggestions don't seem very customizable. I would not feel comfortable implementing her systems in my family culture. She is VERY goal-oriented, vision boards, manifesting, etc. These are not cultures and practices I am comfortable implementing.
4. If I never hear the words "radical love" again, it will be too soon.
5. The way she uses examples rubs me the wrong way. A VERY large portion of her examples are from her personal family. While she does give some negative personal examples, effectively all non-personal examples were negative. Her family was the only subject of good examples. This makes the book feel like one giant humble brag.
1. This is VERY mom-oriented. Obviously moms tend to be the ones that read parenting books, but this one must be pretty alienating for dads to read.
2. It was barely about social justice and much more about Dr. Baxley's parenting style and philosophy. I was at least halfway through before she even really got to anything social justice-related.
3. Her suggestions don't seem very customizable. I would not feel comfortable implementing her systems in my family culture. She is VERY goal-oriented, vision boards, manifesting, etc. These are not cultures and practices I am comfortable implementing.
4. If I never hear the words "radical love" again, it will be too soon.
5. The way she uses examples rubs me the wrong way. A VERY large portion of her examples are from her personal family. While she does give some negative personal examples, effectively all non-personal examples were negative. Her family was the only subject of good examples. This makes the book feel like one giant humble brag.
September 11, 2022
Loving this quote, "I wonder sometimes if so many people in this world turn away from compassion because it hurts."
I think many in my circle watched closely as so much unfolded in 2020 and had our eyes really opened to injustice. Since that time I've been plugging away at being a better person and learning about allyship.
As part of doing that work, this book was on my list. If you are a parent, pick up a copy. It's a quick, impactful read. There are excellent strategies for self-reflection, simple strategies for allyship, fabulous modeling of communication strategies to use on a myriad of difficult topics with children, and even a great section on teaching ourselves and our children self-advocacy skills.
The sections on compassion and kindness really reminded me who I want to be and who I want my family to be in the world. Even if this book doesn't seem like something you think you should read, I'd invite you to consider reading it anyway. With great exercises to complete throughout, you'll definitely walk away having learned something.
I think many in my circle watched closely as so much unfolded in 2020 and had our eyes really opened to injustice. Since that time I've been plugging away at being a better person and learning about allyship.
As part of doing that work, this book was on my list. If you are a parent, pick up a copy. It's a quick, impactful read. There are excellent strategies for self-reflection, simple strategies for allyship, fabulous modeling of communication strategies to use on a myriad of difficult topics with children, and even a great section on teaching ourselves and our children self-advocacy skills.
The sections on compassion and kindness really reminded me who I want to be and who I want my family to be in the world. Even if this book doesn't seem like something you think you should read, I'd invite you to consider reading it anyway. With great exercises to complete throughout, you'll definitely walk away having learned something.
July 8, 2022
This book didn't have anything earth-shattering and new to me. It was definitely written in such a way that beginners could access the information without shutting down. I think that white parents who are wanting to raise social justice-minded kids will find it really helpful as a guide for where to begin. For me, it's more like a 3.5 because I would have liked the author to share more advice and examples of how to respond to overt racism when it isn't happening out of naivety (as that's becoming more common), I felt there could have been more discussion of navigating helping others with kids to ensure they don't develop a savior mentality, and because I recognized some concepts in the text that I felt should have included attribution to the originators (such as Dr. Rudine Sims-Bishop's concept of books as windows, mirrors, and sliding glass doors). Still, worth a read, especially for certain readers.
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