In the beginning, everything was fine.* And then along came Zeus.
*more or less
Ahh Greek myths. Those glorious tales of heroism, honour and... petty squabbles, soap-opera drama and more weird sex than Fifty Shades of Grey could shake a stick at!
It's about time we stopped respecting myths and started laughing at them - because they're really very weird. Did you know Aphrodite, goddess of love and beauty, was born of some discarded genitals? Or that Hera threw her own son off a mountain because he was ugly? Or that Apollo once kidnapped a boat full of people while pretending to be a dolphin?
And let's not even get started on Zeus - king of the gods, ruler of the skies and a man who's never heard of self-control. In fact, if there's one thing most Greek myths have in common, it's that all the drama could have been avoided if SOMEONE could keep it in their toga...
Horrible Histories writer Susie Donkin takes us on a hilarious romp through mythology and the many times the gods (literally) screwed everything up! Stephen Fry's Mythos by way of Drunk History, Zeus is a Dick is perfect for those who like their myths with a heavy dollop of satire.
"It's about time someone called him out on all this." - Hera, Goddess of Marriage, wife of Zeus
"Worst. Father. Ever." - Artemis, Goddess of the Hunt, daughter of Zeus
"Oh yeah, focus on him. I never did anything wrong. Nothing to see here." - Poseidon, God of the Seas, brother of Zeus
Susie Donkin is one of the writers of the fabulous Horrible Histories and she takes some of the approach utilised there to give us a frenetically paced look at Greek Mythology and the Greek Gods. She casts a more critical, humorous and satirical eye on a subject that has more often than not been treated with more reverence than it deserves. This is an entertaining and fun read but the pacing was a little too much for me, resulting in me reading it in small chunks and it has to be said that Zeus really is a dick, especially when looked at the approach of retelling the stories through a modern life lens. It is perhaps not surprising that womanising Zeus turned out the way he did when you take a closer look at his family background. This is a family that has serious dysfunction running right through it, not to mention the unbelievably fantastical transformations laid out in the stories.
One thing you can say is that the storylines are memorable, often because they are bonkers, such as Ouranas getting together with his mother, Gaia, although incest and sexual relationships within the family are hardly unusual in Greek mythology. Gaia gives birth to the Titans, and unhappy with Ouranus, she seeks vengeance and goads Cronus to chop off his dick and the stories go on to inform us that Athena, the goddess of warfare and wisdom, emerged from the split head of Zeus and is instrumental in the gods winning the war against the Titans, and so on. No previous knowledge of Ancient Greece, Greek mythology and Gods is required from the reader to enjoy this book. This is an engaging and comic read, and if you enjoyed Horrible Histories, it is likely you will appreciate the style and wit of this too. Many thanks to Hodder and Stoughton for an ARC.
Thank you to the publisher for providing me with a copy of this book via NetGalley.
Oooh boy. This book is something. Anyone who knows me will know I'm a huge Greek Mythology fan, and have a fair few of these recountings despite having read various versions by now. It's always interesting seeing how people tell the stories.
Susie Donkin very clearly states that this book is written through the lens of humour, which is pretty evident from the cover and title. It's fair to say you know what you're getting yourself into before you start on the stories. Through this book, Greek Mythology is transformed into a soap-opera-esque gossip section, with only the most shocking of stories to be told.
Buuuut...I had a few problems with this telling.
In the introduction where Donkin explains that her intention is one of hilarity, she claims to do so because it's what the Ancient Greeks intended. Now of course, stories are told for entertainment and there may very well be proof that some people found them hilarious, but the very basis of mythology is so much more nuanced than that and making such a broad, bold claim was immediately jarring. There is no one intention behind mythology, the stories being passed through so many years and voices that it would be a convoluted mess to try and figure out. What's more jarring is that the introduction even acknowledges this to some extent - and then contradicts itself in basing the entire book on this supposed intention of hilarity. I also feel like that impression would annoy a lot of Greek Myth fans. I know it made me question some things, at least. And this is coming from someone who loves the Greek Myths partially for their weird and wonderful (and sometimes ridiculous) ways.
Now this actually caused a whole mess of contradicting thoughts on my part, as every single author who has ever retold the Greek Myths will have put their own spin/biases on it, intentional or not. It's just that Susie Donkin does so in an over-exaggerated way. And again, she does make this explicitly clear in the introduction, so it can't be criticised for claiming otherwise.
I think it just ended up missing the mark for multiple reasons within that. First, there is a level of discomfort that comes from presenting serious topics with an edge of lightheartedness. Don't get me wrong, the sexual assault in the myths are called out and we have famous instances such as Medusa's villainy cleared up. But the very title of this book is "Zeus is a dick", and the whistle-stop tour of the myths relating to this ended up feeling like nothing short of an eye roll and shrug of the shoulders. Another case of sexual assault would blitz by with an "oop, he did it again" attitude that just felt weird. Second, it proved inconsistent with its approach to these same topics. While some instances would be called out, instances of coercion would be presented as a game, and the famous Hades and Persephone story told through the romanticised version. It was hard to tell what stance we were aiming for here.
The entire book has a conversational tone, littered with pop culture references throughout. This did suit the humorous intentions and would make this book an accessible read to many, eliminating any reason to be daunted by Greek Mythology. It read like an exaggerated version of Stephen Fry's Mythos, to put it into context. It felt weirdly familiar to me though - I think with Susie Donkin being a writer for Horrible Histories, the somewhat silly approach to history that ruled my childhood years was recognised in her writing. It very much felt like it could've been a Horrible Histories episode for adults. Still, despite the weird familiarity, I can't say I got along with the writing style. It felt like too much. You can't talk to me about Greek Mythology via Harry Styles and Sex Education - it's just too jarring.
So, long story short, I had many mixed opinions on this one. I can see it's intention, and I do think that it works well for its purpose and provides an accessible, more "fun" approach to mythology as opposed to the scary seriousness that can often surround it. While there is value in humour, however, I do feel like it just missed the mark in many areas, sadly.
We've all heard of the Greek Gods. They're dramatic, egotistical, and love a bit of drama. So why do we seem to swoon over them? Worship them? Back in the day, they were the source of salacious gossip amongst the Greek population. Someone to laugh about when your own life is just that little bit shit. Crops failing? Don't worry, at least you haven't been trapped in a net, naked, with your lover by your really ugly husband. Husband cheating? At least he hasn't had his way with every God/Goddess/human in existence and apparently impregnated them all.
This really is a reimagining of the Gods and their more drama filled stories as if they were around today. It's a world where Danae joins Tinder in order to get off Crete, Poseidon is a massive surfer dude, and Zeus...well Zeus is still a dick.
Some of the layout to the stories is a bit chaotic, bouncing around between God's stories without much structure, and the writing is a bit all over the place - but this definitely raised a smile. It's certainly different from other mythology retellings I've read.
Zeus Is A Dick is a very fun, conversational retelling of the Greek myths, primarily featuring stories which focused on Zeus, and all his despicable behaviour throughout history. Though this book takes a decently jovial tone, it doesn't forget to remind us in exactly what ways Zeus is indeed a dick.
Thanks to Rick Riordan and the plethora of memes out there, it's been very conveniently forgotten that the Greek Gods, especially the male ones, were terrible terrible people. While Riordan does talk about them being petty and arrogant, he forgets a few things to make it kid-friendly. They rape women who say no to their advances. Zeus especially does not know what consent means. There's also all that bestiality and incest.
Susie Donkin, on the other hand, doesn't shy away from this. She isn't afraid to call out Zeus for what he is, and the manner in which she does this, which often had me chuckling or saying "OMG, YASS", pretty much complements the fact that she is one of the writers for Horrible Histories. (Also, if you haven't watched the show, you definitely must! You learn history, with all its weird and gory parts, all while laughing like a maniac.)
This book uses quite a bit of foul language, and I know that's not everyone's cup of tea, but it was right up my alley, and it just added to the humour for me. The style was very conversational (as I already mentioned) and was full of pop-cultural references. It's even self deprecating at times, and it was a very light and easy read. I don't often entire read books told in such a vein and it was a great palette cleanser.
I particularly enjoyed the "Medusa deserves better" line of thinking -- as someone who's been reading Greek mythology actively, this is something I've always felt as well! Because let's be honest, what happened to Medusa was terrible, and she didn't deserve to be turned into a Gorgon by Athena as punishment for getting (surprise, surprise) raped by Poseidon. And then she's beheaded many years later by Perseus for being a dreadful monster -- what happened to Medusa is awful, and I definitely think the chapter was titled aptly -- 'Hot take: Medusa deserved better'.
It would have been a 4 star read, if only Donkin had covered a little more about Hermes. Even Hestia and Dionysus had more screen time (page time?) that Hermes, who's one of the Twelve Olympians. While all of Zeus' children who are part of the "Big 12" are discussed, and their origin stories as well, but Hermes' story is summed up in just one sentence -- "one of her (Hera's) husband's bastards" -- while Apollo had two entire chapters dedicated to him. Considering the length of the book (only 240 pages), one more chapter on Hermes would have been a relevant addition. (Especially considering Hermes was the product of Zeus raping yet another female.)
However, maybe brevity is key to this style of narration. It worked for 240 pages, but longer and the reader would have grown tired of it? It might have an editorial decision to cut out Hermes' origin story, but I was definitely looking forward to reading about how Hermes, an infant, managed to steal his half-brother Apollo's cattle.
Nevertheless, I definitely enjoyed this book, and look forward to reading her future works, and revisiting Horrible Histories whenever I'm in the mood for it. :) Thanks to Hodder Studio for providing me with an ARC via NetGalley. It was a hoot!
This is honestly the most tedious and tiresome thing I've ever read. I would have DNF'd this if it weren't a book club with my friends. The entire reading experience for me was like pulling teeth. I did not get on with the sense of humor at all, and I found the chatty writing style absolutely obnoxious. The constant pop culture references (e.g. "listening to Adele and James Blunt," "walking down the aisle to Death Cab for cutie") break the continuity of the world-building - Gaia takes Cronus to a coffee shop?? - and guarantee that this book will age very fast. The blase handling of sexual assault also really turned me off, as if the book was laughing off the (many) rape incidents. "Aaaaand Zeus raped her. Awful. Anywayyyy back to our rollicking tale...!" Does this writer think that something like that should be just shaken off like that? Also the portrayal of Hera as this one-dimensional jealous wife is disappointing - it's just an overdone cliche. If I were encountering Greek myths for the first time (or if I were a sexed-up teenager) I might have found this tolerable, but I have been exposed to Greek myths and many of their variations since I was ten and studied classics in high school, so seeing these stories so deliberately dumbed down and such an unfunny way was excruciating. This entire book was really an excuse to say "dick" a lot. If you want a humorous rendition of myths that actually works, check out the 'Myths and Legends' podcast run by Jason Weiser. At least they don't casually brush off sexual assault.
This was absolutely the best. Laughed and learned so much. In this book we learn all about the Greek myths and legends and gods/goddesses with a modern sauce thrown over it. Yoga. Coffee. Retreats. Bling bling. Other things. I just loved that as it just gave it that bit extra. OK, in the beginning I had to get used to it. Most non-fiction, even the funnier ones, stay very close to things. We start at the beginning, the very very beginning and eventually we get to Zeus. Who is a dick. For reals. But he isn't the only one dick, he is just one of the bigger dicks in the Greek myths. I absolutely loved reading about the gods and goddesses and see what they got up to. The drama. The arguments. The glitter and the glamour. The things they did when things went one way or another. Sadly also the abuse of women (I knew about Medusa but my heart broke when I learned even more facts about her) and rape and men who all think they know it better. I would highly recommend this one to all!
I've long thought that most issues in Greek mythology were caused by Zeus sticking his dick where he shouldn't. Here Donkin sets out to show what a massive bellend the god really was. The author is one of the writers on popular kids show Horrible Histories and it's a very adult version of that humour you find in this book. Obviously I loved it. I love mythology and this is spot on in parts with the way Donkin sums up the attitudes and actions of the immortals. An entertaining read all round.
Do not read this book if you are expecting something serious or groundbreaking. Do read it if you need a pick-me-up. The myths are basic (I mean, they’ve been told for millennia, we all know what happens), but the humour here coincided with mine quite well. I enjoyed the integration of modern day references - the gods are meant to be omniscient, and time is a construct, so theologically It sort of makes sense? Also, felt like a modern take in the oral tradition, which would have been the initial mode of transmission for all these myths.
I definitely wasn’t expecting to get any substantial knowledge of the Greek Myths from this, but the overwhelmingly bad humor ruined any sort of enjoyment.
Zeus Is A Dick – now there is an eye catching title. So much so that when I heard about the book I immediately wanted to read it. This was further backed up when I found that it was written by Susie Donkin, who has written for great shows such as Smack The Pony and Horrible Histories.
So, before we get into it, how much did I know about Zeus and the other Greek myths before I began? Almost nothing. In fairness before I had read the book I couldn’t have told you if Zeus was Greek, Roman, or Norse. So this was a bit of an education, albeit with a lot more swear words than I remember from my school days, I don’t ever remember my history teacher cursing – others did, but he certainly didn’t.
While the title of the book is not wrong, it is a little bit deceptive. Yes, Zeus does in fact come across as a bit of a (ok a major) w*****, he isn’t the only one. His entire family are a bunch of p*****. We get to delve into the entire family in a brilliant way but what it did do was leave me baffled as to just how we came to hold these characters in such high regard.
The author takes a subject that some may otherwise have found dull and injected a big fat slice of humour into it. I am often a little trepidatious when approaching books like this, but there was no need for it with this book. I found it brilliantly funny and really well worked.
This is certainly one you might want to consider for yourself, but I think it may make a perfect gift for the right person (a foul mouthed history buff perhaps). I loved it and I already have a couple of people in mind who I may have to gift it to. Highly recommended.
This is honestly the most tedious and tiresome thing I've ever read. I would have DNF'd this if it weren't a book club with my friends. The entire reading experience for me was like pulling teeth. I did not get on with the sense of humor at all, and I found the chatty writing style absolutely obnoxious. The constant pop culture references (e.g. "listening to Adele and James Blunt," "walking down the aisle to Death Cab for cutie") break the continuity of the world-building - Gaia takes Cronus to a coffee shop?? - and guarantee that this book will age very fast. The blase handling of sexual assault also really turned me off, as if the book was laughing off the (many) rape incidents. "Aaaaand Zeus raped her. Awful. Anywayyyy back to our rollicking tale...!" Does this writer think that something like that should be just shaken off like that? Also the portrayal of Hera as this one-dimensional jealous wife is disappointing - it's just an overdone cliche. If I were encountering Greek myths for the first time (or if I were a sexed-up teenager) I might have found this tolerable, but I have been exposed to Greek myths and many of their variations since I was ten and studied classics in high school, so seeing these stories so deliberately dumbed down and such an unfunny way was excruciating. This entire book was really an excuse to say "dick" a lot. If you want a humorous rendition of myths that actually works, check out the 'Myths and Legends' podcast run by Jason Weiser. At least they don't casually brush off sexual assault.
Update: A reread from last year, it’s just such a fun book to read Really fun book could not put it down Writing is all over the place which was perfect for my ADHD It’s an easy read if you’re in need for a laugh
This was great. Very silly but I don't care. Nothing is taken particularly seriously. Everyone is a dick, not just Zeus, though that's usually because Zeus was a dick first.
I’ve been reading a lot of Greek myth retellings recently, including Pat Barker’s The Silence of the Girls, Helen Morales’ Antigone Rising, Madeline Miller’s Circe and Natalie Haynes’ A Thousand Ships. I’ve become familiar with the capricious behaviour of the gods and the fates of the humans subject to their whims. And during these stories, it certainly crossed my mind that wow, Zeus was a complete dick.
So I was looking forward to Susie Donkin’s examination of Zeus’s dickishness.
Donkin tells us that the original myths were told by gifted storytellers as entertainment for years before they were ever written down and she has made the decision to re-imbue the stories with some of their original soap opera, low brow, gossipy qualities.
I think this was a laudable aim and the approach mainly worked.
I was amused by the liberal sprinkling of twenty-first century cultural references, but I found the stories weren’t long enough or in depth enough for me: the Trojan War was dealt with in just a few throwaway lines! The book will definitely be enjoyed by a younger readership or people who are less familiar with the stories, but for me it was too slight. Recommended, but not for everyone.
Thanks to the author, publisher and NetGalley for providing a review copy in exchange for honest feedback.
My thanks to Hodder & Stoughton /Hodder Studio for an eARC via NetGalley of ‘Zeus is a Dick’ by Susie Donkin in exchange for an honest review.
“‘It’s about time someone called him out on all this’ - Hera, Goddess of Marriage, Wife of Zeus” - cover blurb.
The publishers sum up its premise well: “Ahh Greek myths. Those glorious tales of heroism, honour and... petty squabbles, soap-opera drama and more weird sex than Fifty Shades of Grey could shake a stick at! It's about time we stopped respecting myths and started laughing at them.”
As might be expected from the cover art and title, this is a highly irreverent overview of Greek mythology.
While this is Susie Donkin’s first book, she’s been part of the writing team for CBBC’s ‘Horrible Histories’ since 2009. Like HH, this is fun, often silly, and is generously sprinkled with pop culture references. It does contain strong language, which might be offensive to some readers.
I enjoy retellings of mythology and this little book was great fun and provided me with many laugh out loud moments.
The book retells Greek myths in a modern and humorous way. The author incorporates many clever jokes and delivers the myths in an unconventional style that is sure to entertain readers.
However, after reaching the halfway point, the jokes begin to feel repetitive and tiresome, which may make it challenging for some to continue reading. Personally, I would have preferred a deeper exploration into the essence and meaning of the myths, rather than a flat retelling of the stories. Unfortunately, the book mainly focuses on the endless sexual exploits of gods and humans, violence, and victim blaming.
Despite this, it's important to remember that the author is a stand-up comedian and the book is meant to be lighthearted and amusing. But ultimately, it should at least be able to elicit some humour or amusement, even if it's not meant to be taken too seriously.
Firstly, I had no idea that until I started reading this that it was a full on myth retelling.
Susie Donkin writes the Greek myths in a new modern way, in a way that feels fresh, humorous and different. A style for lack of a better word that feels "gossipy" a he said/she said type thing. At first this was fine and funny, I felt engaged and interested but after a while it gets boring and irritating. The light humorous nature of the writing is fine for some of the myth retellings but with some of the darker myths it feels insensitive and offhand.
Really enjoyed reading this. Donkin wrote for Horrible Histories and there’s a witty narration throughout like you’d expect. Lighter than Mythos but much easier to get through, I didn’t mind the modern pop-culture references
Donkin’s new book is one of the most brilliant funny and informative book that I have ever read and although I will be chuckling for days afterwards, I have learned so much at the same time. She is a brilliant force to be reckon with and can’t wait to read more from this author.
Donkin’s new book is the story of the Greek Gods but instead of a dry story giving us a play by play of the history of the Gods, we get a fun, comedic joyride giving us the stories and histories that helps to put all the many liaisons, family relationships and children in an order that we can finally grasps. I love the Greek Gods and their stories have always loved since I was a youngster but I found it terribly difficult to put things in order. Donkin does this with a flourish that is all her own.
This is a must read and one that everyone should at least own or pick up and read. Funny, intelligent and plan bonkers which is the way that all those ancient Gods were. I really hope that Donkin explores other books and makes this a series, like the Roman, Norse, Egyptian and even some of the modern religions could use this type of look and feel. I for one have learned so much and laugh to I cried. My only complaint is I want more and more and so much more.
Loved this and this is one that I will be shouting from on my weekly show, my monthly newsletters and anyone who will give me a listen. This one of the must reads of the year. Outstanding.