Insecure Attachment: Anxious or Avoidant in love? How attachment styles help or hurt your relationships. Learn to form secure emotional connections.

by David Lawson

Whether we are aware of it or not, our childhood experiences play a huge role in producing the type of people we become. The relationships we experience as children, with our parents or other primary caregivers, have a profound effect on how we react to situations throughout our lives; and how we interact with the people around us. As young children, we instinctively respond to the type of love and support offered by our parents or carers. While a strong bond with our primary caregiver is critical to our development in these early years, any difficulties resulting from this attachment can lead to problems with relationships and self-image in later life. In fact, dysfunctional or incorrect dysfunctional attachment patterns can lead us to make poor emotional choices , or enter dysfunctional and unstable relationships that can be characterized by violence, oppression or submission. Human relationships can give rise to the constant presence of fear of abandonment, associated with controlling behaviors, a continuous search for reassurance, emotional hyper-vigilance and sometimes even emotional blackmail. Knowing what they are, and managing them efficiently, guarantees you a positive and stable vision of your relationships for life. We recommend that you read this book if your relationship is characterized • Dissatisfaction and/or high levels of conflict. • Obsessiveness, intrusiveness, jealousy and mistrust. • A strong desire for fusion and concern about rejection and abandonment. • Interpersonal distance. • A low level of emotional involvement. • Intimacy issues and an inability to have fun or thrive in sexual relationships. Don't worry if you identify with all or some of these conditions. The patterns and beliefs that we develop as children, although often deeply rooted in our psyche, can be unlearned and replaced with positive beliefs and approaches that allow you to embark on a more constructive path through life. You may constantly ask yourself these "Why would anyone be interested in me?" I'm not up to it! But do you love me enough? What if you abandon me? What if he's cheating on me? I can't be without him! If, however, you do not face such problems, you will bring their negative influence into your life, leading to the unwanted and repetitive situations that you have become familiar with. Understanding how to get rid of attachment problems is one of the most satisfying and valuable things you can do for yourself. You will open the door to a greater sense of self-esteem, successful friendships, strong family ties and long-lasting and loving romantic relationships.

Genres: Self Help, Psychology, Nonfiction

96 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 15, 2020

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author by this name in the Goodreads database.

David Lawson, PhD is a writer and researcher whose main focus is on mental well-being. With his courses and his coaching activity he has helped many people solve problems with personality disorders, self-perception and depression. He is considered to be a promoter of the well-being of the individual with a holistic approach that, over the years, has allowed him to achieve extraordinarily positive results. He is both loved and criticized for his friendly and sometimes direct approach.

It is helpful to think that true success occurs when you act on a daily basis. Habits are essential for achieving goals and for living the life you want to live.

Unlike other personal development guides, its content focuses on action.

Reviews

[Jennifer Mielke · Rating 5 out of 5]

Enlightening information

This book takes a close look at insecure attachment. The book opens by looking at the roots of i secure attachement in childhood. Then moves into how insecure attachment manifests as we grow and what we can do about it. I like that the author gives great i fo on how to heal yourself and kind of change our i nner dialogue to reflect the fact that we can depend on some people. Overall, I found this book interesting to read.

[Tanya Malaszuk · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book

I really enjoyed reading this book. Relationships are a huge part of our lives and hanging a secure attachments is a key point. I liked how this book noted that we need to learn how to be in a relationship, and how our early life experiences affect how we attach to others.

[Toni · Rating 4 out of 5]

Informative read

This book takes you thru relationships and shows you the different types of attachments involved. It breaks them down shows what could have caused it and how to overcome it. I recommend this book to anyone wanting a positive experience with their relationships instead of the same predictability.

[Brian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fun read!!

I chose the four star review because there is a lot of information packed into this book.I also gave it this review because it was very short. Its nice sometimes to have a short book and to feel like you accomplished the book fully. And this book is so good about talking about kindness in your relationship and balance .

[Melissa]

Really helps you get to the heart of the cause

This book makes a very true statement when it said being around others makes us a better person. We need to be around others but there are some who struggle to do this. Many because of things from their past. This book really helps the reader look within and find the cause and then to deal with it.

[Danielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hit home

This book hit home from the beginning as my childhood was shaped by a lot of what is talked about at first, traumatic experiences, and how it sets you up for future relationships. It can have long lasting damages. I appreciate this book putting this in context and easy to follow and work through.

[Lacy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Anxious here

I am a pretty anxiety ridden person. I know it affects myself, my family and forends to some extent. Always looking for new exercises and advice that can help deal with it. There are several ideas that I think are worth a try.

[Carina Daniel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Attachments

Insecure attachments happen in all kinds of relationships, and this book helped me understand them. They happen in family relationships, friendships, romantic relationships, among others. Good read.

[Jason Comely · Rating 3 out of 5]

A primer.

[Jessie Hazell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very relatable

This book touched a little closer to home than I was expecting. I related to more than I thought and I learned quite a bit more.

[Sabina Panayotova]

Hard to explain how valuable this book is. We learn how to make attachments in the first 2-3 years in out life, so if you plan on parenting, I strongly recomend.

[Siloe Arce · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy-to-read book. I found several chapters to be really informative and useful. This is a good overview and summary of insecure attachment definition, forms of expression, root cause from childhood and actionable advices on how to deal with it.

There were some parts I did not find relevant or useful in this book but most of it is really good stuff to read.

I really appreciate this first closer look at attachment styles and open my perspective on how to review my relationships with care and consciousness.

[Lise · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very useful and interesting book!! All scientific concepts are nicely explained and you get a lot of practical tips that help you better your way of communicating and feeling in your relationships. Importance of understanding how you feel and why is made clear in useful and easy manners. Happy to have read this and using it in my daily relationships!