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Extraordinary Parenting: the essential guide to parenting and educating at home
Do you want to transform your relationship with your child, engage their curiosity, and make your home the best place for them to learn?
In this warm, accessible book, experienced parenting coach Eloise Rickman tells you everything you really need to know about parenting and educating your child at home. Whether you’re planning to make a permanent move to homeschooling or you’re temporarily balancing it alongside paid work, Extraordinary Parenting shows that you don’t need a huge house, endless free time, or a host of expensive resources to unlock your child’s potential.
Instead, this straightforward and empathic book will teach you to:
— Deepen your connection with your child to create an attachment that promotes learning and openness.
— Build strong, adaptable family rhythms to provide your child with security and stimulation every day, every month, and every year.
— Create a calm, simplified home environment which will encourage deep play and independence — whatever your living situation.
— Discover enjoyable ways of learning together as a family, identify your child’s interests, and use traditional teaching materials in a creative way.
— Take care of your own needs as a parent, in order to become the parent your child needs.
Based on years of research and hands-on work with parents, this book will reassure you that, whilst extraordinary times call for extraordinary parenting, you can be sure that you are up to the challenge.
In this warm, accessible book, experienced parenting coach Eloise Rickman tells you everything you really need to know about parenting and educating your child at home. Whether you’re planning to make a permanent move to homeschooling or you’re temporarily balancing it alongside paid work, Extraordinary Parenting shows that you don’t need a huge house, endless free time, or a host of expensive resources to unlock your child’s potential.
Instead, this straightforward and empathic book will teach you to:
— Deepen your connection with your child to create an attachment that promotes learning and openness.
— Build strong, adaptable family rhythms to provide your child with security and stimulation every day, every month, and every year.
— Create a calm, simplified home environment which will encourage deep play and independence — whatever your living situation.
— Discover enjoyable ways of learning together as a family, identify your child’s interests, and use traditional teaching materials in a creative way.
— Take care of your own needs as a parent, in order to become the parent your child needs.
Based on years of research and hands-on work with parents, this book will reassure you that, whilst extraordinary times call for extraordinary parenting, you can be sure that you are up to the challenge.
160 pages, Paperback
Published May 25, 2020
95 people are currently reading
355 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews
July 3, 2020
This book was written for parenting during quarantine. Regardless of your parenting style, every parent needs some encouragement, even a refresher, and this is a great book to find it. If parents are having a hard time with the pandemic, I can’t imagine the big emotions small children are trying to navigate within themselves. This was a informative to help build and strengthen the relationship with children of school age in your home.
August 9, 2021
What a lovely book; I really admire and aspire to her approach (although my son is only 16 months old and homeschooling isn't part of my plan, so I admittedly did skimread the chapter that was specifically homeschool-related).
A few things that stood out for me:
-The concept of Sites of Mutual Fulfilment (which she actually attributes to Lucy AitkenRead) – places/activities that both you and your child enjoy, which you should seek out as much as possible to avoid burnout.
-The Steiner/Waldorf idea of breathing-in times (time spent connecting with your child), followed by breathing-out times (time where your child's focus is outwards and they're playing more independently), and so on in a natural rhythm.
-Speaking of rhythm: how much kids thrive on knowing what their day will bring, which inspired me to finally get around to making a visual rhythm chart for Alfie.
-Putting words to something I've noticed in myself: the more swamped I feel by relentless parenting responsibilities, the more inclined I am to, paradoxically, spend any free time I do have reading parenting books/listening to parenting podcasts/buying things for Alfie/making changes to his space/etc. As Rickman says, it's easier to do all this than to actually make the space to meet our own needs.
-Really appreciated the substantial final chapter on parent self-care, which went far beyond the usual tacked-on paragraph ("make time for you, sleep when baby sleeps, accept offers of help!"). Lots of concrete, realistic suggestions, e.g. as much as possible, do chores when your child is awake so you can use naps and evenings to rest; allow yourself to sometimes rest BEFORE everything on your to-do list is done (something I'm terrible at).
-And really, really appreciated that she consistently used phrasing like "if you have a partner ...", rather than assuming, and offered many tips for renters and people with small spaces or no outdoor space. Made me feel like, for once, I was actually part of the target audience and not standing on the outskirts trying to peek in.
A few things that stood out for me:
-The concept of Sites of Mutual Fulfilment (which she actually attributes to Lucy AitkenRead) – places/activities that both you and your child enjoy, which you should seek out as much as possible to avoid burnout.
-The Steiner/Waldorf idea of breathing-in times (time spent connecting with your child), followed by breathing-out times (time where your child's focus is outwards and they're playing more independently), and so on in a natural rhythm.
-Speaking of rhythm: how much kids thrive on knowing what their day will bring, which inspired me to finally get around to making a visual rhythm chart for Alfie.
-Putting words to something I've noticed in myself: the more swamped I feel by relentless parenting responsibilities, the more inclined I am to, paradoxically, spend any free time I do have reading parenting books/listening to parenting podcasts/buying things for Alfie/making changes to his space/etc. As Rickman says, it's easier to do all this than to actually make the space to meet our own needs.
-Really appreciated the substantial final chapter on parent self-care, which went far beyond the usual tacked-on paragraph ("make time for you, sleep when baby sleeps, accept offers of help!"). Lots of concrete, realistic suggestions, e.g. as much as possible, do chores when your child is awake so you can use naps and evenings to rest; allow yourself to sometimes rest BEFORE everything on your to-do list is done (something I'm terrible at).
-And really, really appreciated that she consistently used phrasing like "if you have a partner ...", rather than assuming, and offered many tips for renters and people with small spaces or no outdoor space. Made me feel like, for once, I was actually part of the target audience and not standing on the outskirts trying to peek in.
April 18, 2021
I actually really like this! Written in regards to the covid pandemic but loads of great advice in general! Highly recommended for people like my family who are working from home and staying at home with the kiddo(s). Advice from babies to school aged and even teenagers. Advice for just managing a family rhythm to homeschooling to playing to self care for mom and dad!
November 21, 2023
It's a parenting book that didn't make me angry, which is actually high praise. 😄
October 12, 2021
"Timing the market" is a cliche phrase that I will attach to this review; it was released at the perfect time. It was released during the pinnacle moments of the Covid19 pandemic, particularly where the West was in need of gulps of hope. It was timed perfectly at its release. Many books contain wisdom and this one has a lot of it. It is very possible that readers depart this book feeling like they are equipped with better strategies on how to relate with their child and parent them. Hopefully this review does not discourage you from reading this book. There is a lot of wisdom here. As a professional educator that hopes to become a parent in the near future, I even found myself applying some of the insights in this book into the profession. Why does this book earn one star from my reading experience?
Education and the profession of teaching are exactly where this book earns its 1 star. Before I dive into this point, I need to get readers of this review imagining. I will then link it to Jonathon Swift and his A Modest Proposal and then come out with my point at the end. Please stay with me --if you want-- because I try to make my case all come together at the end of this review.
Imagine, for a moment, reading a statement like this: "you do not need to be a doctor in order to perform surgery on your child." This is a shocking statement that may evoke images of boiling babies in Jonathon Swift's A Modest Proposal. So parents do not need to be a doctors in order to perform surgery on their child(ren). Go ahead, diagnose, and cut them open, because you know your child best. This statement stands on this pillar (knowing thy child best). There is another pillar it stands on and lets explore it further (start boiling the water, sweet cakes).
Imagine with me for a moment that I then started to make generalized statements about hospitals and institutions where surgeons work: hospitals are noxious to patients. Hospitals are ill-equipped because they do not have enough resources to tailor to the needs of individual patients. Hospitals use dated approaches to doctoring. Hospitals do not meet the diverse needs of patients. In fact, so many patients are let down in hospitals and live less due to human error, particularly doctor fault. Hospitals are dangerous places for patients; this is why you do need to be a doctor to perform surgery on your child and why you do not need to be a professional doctor to do so. Get the baby ready for the pot of water. He is wailing, as Swift writes in A Modest Proposal.
Clarification is needed because I concern myself with some employer or principal reading this review and my digital footprint on Goodreads: written in the 2 paragraphs above are attempts at satire. Jonathon Swift did write a satire that mentions the boiling of babies to strengthen his point. My attempt may not mirror a professional scholar such as Swift. Thus stated, I will say this boldly: the paragraph above this one reflects the author's argument about teachers and schools! And what boils my baby is that the author pigeon holes all schools, and strongly advocates for parents being the educators for their children instead of professional certified teachers themselves. This evokes a "Pass the knife, hun. Lets cut her open because I think she is sick on the knee with a bruise" image in my cogs that cannot be removed.
Only in emergency situations or if the parent is a professional themselves may I ever suggest that a parent perform surgery on their child. Why do I NOT suggest that a parent does surgery on their child? For multiple reasons: 1) there is little to no evidentiary support for such a ridiculous claim. 2) to keep with the author's claim about not needing to be a professional, the parents are not formally trained in surgical procedures towards children. 3) These claims I am making are likely to anger doctors, just like it angered me as a teacher when the author makes claims about school systems and teachers just like I made claims about doctors above.
The sad, sad, sad thing about this book making the statement that parents do not need to be professionals to teach their children is that it provided absolutely no evidence to support such a claim. There is evidence to suggest that parents can homeschool.. There is scholarship that argues for and proves the benefits of homeschooling for children, but the author cites nothing. I am not suggesting that homeschooling is bad or that there are 0 benefits to it. There are and the research says so. However, this author clearly did not do her homework to prove her bold claim about "not needing to be a professional teacher to teach their child."
Had the author cited sources and proved to me that she actually did the research about her bold claim, then this book is easily a 5 star read. I am all for hearing other perspectives that are supported with research. There are many moments in this book where the author does provide solid evidence for her parenting strategies, but her education part, generally, is meek, and the part where she boldly claims that parents can just educate their child and not need be professional teachers to do so is baseless. In essence, Rickman claims that parents can do surgery on their child because hospitals are terrible and parents know their children best. This is fallacious logic.
Faulty logic and fallacious thinking need to be challenged. There are dangers that can result if we do not do our job as readers to challenge absurdities, such as reinforcing inaccuracies and misrepresentations in societies about teachers and schools.
I pondered this review for awhile, because I thought, well maybe I can give the author some leeway by chalking her claim about teachers to the struggles of the covid19 pandemic. The more I thought about it though, the more I realized I was trying to rationalize and excuse the author for her logic.
Ultimately, this is the first book I have ever read that earns a 1 star from me. It was great up until the chapter on education at home. And then, my nerves boiled over, and I was reminded about Jonathon Swift's A Modest Proposal.
Education and the profession of teaching are exactly where this book earns its 1 star. Before I dive into this point, I need to get readers of this review imagining. I will then link it to Jonathon Swift and his A Modest Proposal and then come out with my point at the end. Please stay with me --if you want-- because I try to make my case all come together at the end of this review.
Imagine, for a moment, reading a statement like this: "you do not need to be a doctor in order to perform surgery on your child." This is a shocking statement that may evoke images of boiling babies in Jonathon Swift's A Modest Proposal. So parents do not need to be a doctors in order to perform surgery on their child(ren). Go ahead, diagnose, and cut them open, because you know your child best. This statement stands on this pillar (knowing thy child best). There is another pillar it stands on and lets explore it further (start boiling the water, sweet cakes).
Imagine with me for a moment that I then started to make generalized statements about hospitals and institutions where surgeons work: hospitals are noxious to patients. Hospitals are ill-equipped because they do not have enough resources to tailor to the needs of individual patients. Hospitals use dated approaches to doctoring. Hospitals do not meet the diverse needs of patients. In fact, so many patients are let down in hospitals and live less due to human error, particularly doctor fault. Hospitals are dangerous places for patients; this is why you do need to be a doctor to perform surgery on your child and why you do not need to be a professional doctor to do so. Get the baby ready for the pot of water. He is wailing, as Swift writes in A Modest Proposal.
Clarification is needed because I concern myself with some employer or principal reading this review and my digital footprint on Goodreads: written in the 2 paragraphs above are attempts at satire. Jonathon Swift did write a satire that mentions the boiling of babies to strengthen his point. My attempt may not mirror a professional scholar such as Swift. Thus stated, I will say this boldly: the paragraph above this one reflects the author's argument about teachers and schools! And what boils my baby is that the author pigeon holes all schools, and strongly advocates for parents being the educators for their children instead of professional certified teachers themselves. This evokes a "Pass the knife, hun. Lets cut her open because I think she is sick on the knee with a bruise" image in my cogs that cannot be removed.
Only in emergency situations or if the parent is a professional themselves may I ever suggest that a parent perform surgery on their child. Why do I NOT suggest that a parent does surgery on their child? For multiple reasons: 1) there is little to no evidentiary support for such a ridiculous claim. 2) to keep with the author's claim about not needing to be a professional, the parents are not formally trained in surgical procedures towards children. 3) These claims I am making are likely to anger doctors, just like it angered me as a teacher when the author makes claims about school systems and teachers just like I made claims about doctors above.
The sad, sad, sad thing about this book making the statement that parents do not need to be professionals to teach their children is that it provided absolutely no evidence to support such a claim. There is evidence to suggest that parents can homeschool.. There is scholarship that argues for and proves the benefits of homeschooling for children, but the author cites nothing. I am not suggesting that homeschooling is bad or that there are 0 benefits to it. There are and the research says so. However, this author clearly did not do her homework to prove her bold claim about "not needing to be a professional teacher to teach their child."
Had the author cited sources and proved to me that she actually did the research about her bold claim, then this book is easily a 5 star read. I am all for hearing other perspectives that are supported with research. There are many moments in this book where the author does provide solid evidence for her parenting strategies, but her education part, generally, is meek, and the part where she boldly claims that parents can just educate their child and not need be professional teachers to do so is baseless. In essence, Rickman claims that parents can do surgery on their child because hospitals are terrible and parents know their children best. This is fallacious logic.
Faulty logic and fallacious thinking need to be challenged. There are dangers that can result if we do not do our job as readers to challenge absurdities, such as reinforcing inaccuracies and misrepresentations in societies about teachers and schools.
I pondered this review for awhile, because I thought, well maybe I can give the author some leeway by chalking her claim about teachers to the struggles of the covid19 pandemic. The more I thought about it though, the more I realized I was trying to rationalize and excuse the author for her logic.
Ultimately, this is the first book I have ever read that earns a 1 star from me. It was great up until the chapter on education at home. And then, my nerves boiled over, and I was reminded about Jonathon Swift's A Modest Proposal.
July 6, 2020
Pandemic Parenting
What a timely encouragement for parents during this time of pandemic. This book is a great reminder of the many great things that we do as parents without being aware of. Many times we think we need to do it all, or be this perfect parent, but we forget that our instincts are sometimes spot on. If you agree, this book will be a great reassurance of that.
If you’re still doubting your capabilities or if you’re a new parent, what Eloise put together through this book is a great primer. I wish I had this when I was a new mom. But reading it now with a 3 year old son, it’s still helpful and a treasure trove of great resources. I found a parent who is on social media with a similar lifestyle to us and it’s been great talking to her. I wouldn’t have found out if Eloise didn’t share about their family in this book.
If you don’t care for the information overload of social media, different parenting books and blogs, this will be a perfect resource for you.
What a timely encouragement for parents during this time of pandemic. This book is a great reminder of the many great things that we do as parents without being aware of. Many times we think we need to do it all, or be this perfect parent, but we forget that our instincts are sometimes spot on. If you agree, this book will be a great reassurance of that.
If you’re still doubting your capabilities or if you’re a new parent, what Eloise put together through this book is a great primer. I wish I had this when I was a new mom. But reading it now with a 3 year old son, it’s still helpful and a treasure trove of great resources. I found a parent who is on social media with a similar lifestyle to us and it’s been great talking to her. I wouldn’t have found out if Eloise didn’t share about their family in this book.
If you don’t care for the information overload of social media, different parenting books and blogs, this will be a perfect resource for you.
June 28, 2020
I pre-ordered this book because I already home educate my children (and work from home!), then when it arrived I wondered whether it was aimed more towards parents finding themselves home educating due to Covid-19.
Actually, there’s a wonderful mix of both and I ended up loving this book.
Eloise writes in such a positive, non-judgemental way and offers plenty of advice which can be tailored to all family setups. I like the questions throughout which I started to work through on paper and became excited at all of the ideas I was having about education, our home and our family’s values.
Since lockdown, we’ve ended up doing pretty much nothing. Neither us or the kids have had the motivation. After reading this book I really do feel reinvigorated and ready to restart our family rhythms, without feeling guilty for taking that time out.
I will be recommending this book to all of the parents I know, no matter what the age of their children!
Actually, there’s a wonderful mix of both and I ended up loving this book.
Eloise writes in such a positive, non-judgemental way and offers plenty of advice which can be tailored to all family setups. I like the questions throughout which I started to work through on paper and became excited at all of the ideas I was having about education, our home and our family’s values.
Since lockdown, we’ve ended up doing pretty much nothing. Neither us or the kids have had the motivation. After reading this book I really do feel reinvigorated and ready to restart our family rhythms, without feeling guilty for taking that time out.
I will be recommending this book to all of the parents I know, no matter what the age of their children!
December 8, 2021
This book was originally written for parents going through the pandemic. Faced with the daunting task of homeschooling while WFH was in place at the height of the pandemic, it provides a lovely space for those parents who are stressed, worried, and anxious about their child’s education and well-being.
What I especially liked about this book was that Eloise Rickman gives grace for parents who are struggling. She reminds parents to look after themselves first and as the saying goes “put your oxygen mask on before you help others’ with theirs.”
Many homeschooling books that I’ve gone through have had the message of sacrifice, sacrifice, sacrifice. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t sacrifice yourself for your children, but burning yourself out is a surefire way to end up exploding on your unassuming child. You shouldn’t set yourself on fire to keep someone warm, after all. I like that she had a chapter dedicated to caring for yourself, taking a moment to process difficult feelings, and reminding parents to share the load. You can’t take care of others unless you take care of yourself.
What I especially liked about this book was that Eloise Rickman gives grace for parents who are struggling. She reminds parents to look after themselves first and as the saying goes “put your oxygen mask on before you help others’ with theirs.”
Many homeschooling books that I’ve gone through have had the message of sacrifice, sacrifice, sacrifice. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t sacrifice yourself for your children, but burning yourself out is a surefire way to end up exploding on your unassuming child. You shouldn’t set yourself on fire to keep someone warm, after all. I like that she had a chapter dedicated to caring for yourself, taking a moment to process difficult feelings, and reminding parents to share the load. You can’t take care of others unless you take care of yourself.
August 1, 2025
I love the tone of this work. That’s why I gave it five stars. It’s very positive and affirming. It’s inclusive and kind. It’s accepting and spends a lot of time normalizing challenges rather than blaming parents for every ill in the world. I don’t think I’ve ever read a parenting book that is as positive and accepting of all parents and all lifestyles as this one. That’s what makes it a standout parenting book read. I didn’t reach the end feeling beat up for everything I’m doing wrong or not achieving.
With that said, much of the actual content is covered in other works. I didn’t necessarily uncover any new strategies or ideas. She interviewed and/or quoted many of the current gurus. But while the content was not necessarily original, I took a lot of comfort in the overall tone and attitude of the work.
With that said, much of the actual content is covered in other works. I didn’t necessarily uncover any new strategies or ideas. She interviewed and/or quoted many of the current gurus. But while the content was not necessarily original, I took a lot of comfort in the overall tone and attitude of the work.
January 2, 2021
this book was being written by the author for a while as she is a homeschooling parent but she felt the need to issue it during pandemic to help parents when needed.
I bought it as am homeschooling my daughter.
even though I have read many parenting books. it's nice to see it all put together and connected with learning at home.
I think it's a great book for anyone. not necessary only for homeschooling families. quality time spent together and understanding your child and your family rhythm is necessary for every family.
I bought it as am homeschooling my daughter.
even though I have read many parenting books. it's nice to see it all put together and connected with learning at home.
I think it's a great book for anyone. not necessary only for homeschooling families. quality time spent together and understanding your child and your family rhythm is necessary for every family.
November 14, 2020
This book is so accessible and encouraging, it feels like a warm hug when you need it. I have recommended it to all my friends who have embarked on the parenting journey.
This guide offers reassurance, allows for imperfections, and gives concise, clear and easily adaptable advice that can be useful to any parent. Looking forward to reading your next book Eloise! Please do keep it coming!
This guide offers reassurance, allows for imperfections, and gives concise, clear and easily adaptable advice that can be useful to any parent. Looking forward to reading your next book Eloise! Please do keep it coming!
September 26, 2020
More of an introduction and general guide that nicely summarizes many things I've read elsewhere in bits and pieces. Definitely would have liked to have this if I were just starting out with homeschooling, but it had some helpful wisdom and good reminders!
April 7, 2021
This book felt so warm and encouraging. There was quite a bit of information, and some good points, but it would have been nice to have more specific, actionable suggestions. Definitely more of an overview than a deep dive /discussion. Maybe someday she'll do a workbook for this?
July 17, 2021
This is such a well written, helpful and empowering book. The moment I’d finished, I was flicking back through from the beginning to re-read all the bits I’d highlighted and make notes for myself. So many useful takeaways and I know it’s one I’ll read again.
June 24, 2020
"Beautiful childhood" is exactly what I hope my children to remember theirs to be and this book has been a practical and realistic guide.
June 28, 2020
Much needed words for this time.
July 3, 2020
This was such a helpful and informative book, especially during this time of Covid19. The self care chapter was particularly refreshing and there are loads of practical ideas to help with parenting.
July 9, 2020
A nice book and enjoyable read. It didnt go very far in depth and instead covered a lot of topics broadly so is more useful if you need an introduction to home schooling.
October 23, 2020
Clear and concise and well-rounded, especially for newer parents. Lots of resources and ideas.
Read
November 3, 2020Did not finish. The first half discussed good parenting techniques
November 28, 2020
This book, written during the pandemic, had some really helpful info and lots of encouragement. Not all of it was relevant to my situation, but I did find some good stuff in here.
December 31, 2020
Beautiful book, so gentle and kind. Would recommend to anyone wanting to start a more peaceful way of parenting
February 3, 2021
One word: Amazing!
A few more words: So helpful and just what I needed! Ideas, support, guidance. Ah, a must read!
🙂
A few more words: So helpful and just what I needed! Ideas, support, guidance. Ah, a must read!
🙂
Read
February 22, 2021Found this very helpful, especially as it was written around Lockdown times. Would listen again for reminders
June 23, 2021
A real hodge-podge of parenting, educating, and self-care philosophies, most of which I agree with, so I enjoyed it well enough. This grown has just been trodden before.
July 10, 2021
The author shares many good ideas for parenting at any time. I’ve read a lot of the books that she cites and I found that she brought the concepts together well.
March 7, 2022
Warm, practical, thorough and reassuring
August 4, 2023
similar to the last parenting book i read but i liked the scripts for certain situations and the focus on self compassion and confidence. would check out the recommended books/papers/media references
July 9, 2024
Many things I didn't agree with, but lots of practical ideas for fun activities and such.
May 22, 2025
Packed with tips and follow-ups, it encourages gentle and empathetic parenting. Because parenting should not be anything else.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews