Will and Spirit: A Contemplative Psychology

by Gerald G. May

"A rich book covering many areas of human experience. . . . For the person looking for an intelligent and clear presentation of the relationship between psychological and spiritual growth, this is the book to read.'-- America

Genres: Spirituality, Psychology, Nonfiction, Self Help, Religion

368 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1983

Reviews

[Susan Andres · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading this book was a lot like being in a yoga class. It's challenging - but never boring - and the last chapter is like that glorious "deep relaxation" period that rewards you for showing up and simply being willing to do the work. In many ways the book affirmed my own experiences; in other ways, it opened my mind radically and shattered a few old ideas to which I'd been clinging. One immediate benefit: it gave me the inspiration and guidance I needed to practice daily meditation, without worrying that I'm not doing it right or wanting to jump out of my skin.

[Shashank · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a curative for easy answers, and a goad to further inquiry into one's existing conclusions about spirituality.

The central dichotomy of willingness and willfulness in relation to the divine may seem a bit simplistic, but in Gerald May’s hand it becomes a tool for fruitful inquiry. GM asks what exactly are we surrendering to in our willingness? Because not only is willingness often partial but what we surrender to is usually mixed [some worthy of and some not so worthy of surrender]. These are not questions that have absolute answers, this questioning is the context of grace and our human all too human attempts to allow the transcendent divine into our lives.

For GM willing surrender to a greater power is not the abandonment of responsibility in our daily lives, but the base from which we must become more responsible, more discriminating, more intelligent, and more careful of our actual power.

There is quite a bit of discussion about trying to substitute very human needs [sex, intimacy, power, and self-worth] to quench our desire for the transcendent. No need in itself can ultimately satisfy that hunger, nor should any relationship or object be burdened with such demands. When they are it leads to a lot of suffering and psychological problems which are explored in the book.

Any one perspective can become reductive and distorting if made the primarily lens through which we interpret the world. The experience of unity can be profound and a bedrock for a spiritual life but it is not an interpretive solution to all the mysteries/difficulties of life [thank god lol].

This is a spiritual psychology which sees an overlap between spirituality and psychology but an autonomous and primary nature to spirituality which cannot be reduced to psychology, though psychological inquiry can be very beneficial to spiritual journeying and avoiding pitfalls and self-delusions.

The book is clearly grounded in Gerald Mays actual experiences and this allows him to touch on many topics [only a few of which I’ve mentioned] without losing an earthiness and friendly conversational quality the book possesses.

A few criticisms: The writing can be a little repetitive and the organizing of topics is a bit haphazard. As often when trying to think about what kind of person is going to be centrally important in modern spirituality the author seems to describe a person that resembles themselves [spiritual friend/advisor].

It doesn’t have the precision or detail of a well-worn contemplative path, but it is much more down to earth and practical then most popular spirituality or theoretical transpersonal psychology books. These are issues and topics that clearly engaged Gerald May for most of his life, both internally and in dialogue with psychology clients and friends. This book is truly the fruition of a life spend in a rich spiritual dialogue and a searching/finding heart.

[Elizabeth Andrew · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gerald May is a deeply trustworthy guide to the spiritual dimensions of being human. WILL AND SPIRIT is about the most thorough, gentle, astute handbook to the contemplative life I've yet read. "Much of psychology is really misplaced spirituality," he writes. "As arid as theology may seem in our modern experience-oriented world, it remains one of the best human protections against spiritual distortions." May's theology is far from arid; rather, it's grounded in justice, healing, loving, and the fundamental human longings for unconditional love, belonging and union, and the need to just BE.

I'm taking the time to outline this book so I can access it readily and practice its wisdom.

"The first requirement for even partial encounter with mystery, then, is to be willing to surrender one’s habitual tendencies to either solve or ignore mystery. Secondly, one must be willing to risk some degree of fear. These two conditions combine to make up wht in my understanding is the essence of contemplative spirituality: the willingness and the courage to open oneself to mystery."
--Gerald May, Will and Spirit 32

[Tyra · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have found this book, also by Gerald May, a little heavy but helpful. His perspective on love was quite interesting. He said that being "in love" is not about a person but is a state of being. People disappoint, but when we are in tune with God, the author and creator of love, May says that everything around us is more vibrant and beautiful. Staying "in love" is the tricky part."

[Brian Wilcox · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best treatment of the inner, psychological dynamics of Contemplation, or Contemplative Prayer, and Contemplative spirituality I have read in 20 plus years of training in, and teaching and writing in Contemplative spirituality from varied wisdom paths, East and West. This is one of few books that remains in my library.

[Will Hocker · Rating 5 out of 5]

An incredibly deep and thoughtful tome. I read it first about 7 years ago. I've just begun to read it for the third time. Perhaps, study is a more accurate description of what I'm now doing with this book.

[John Fletcher · Rating 5 out of 5]

An amazing look at psychology and spirituality

I almost gave up early on in the book because the level of precision and sophisticated words felt like it was almost a clinical manual. He loosened up eventually and I got into the flow of his perspective and I am so impressed with his ability to articulate the difference between will and spirit, psychology and spirituality (if you want to simplify it). Anyone with a heart to go deeper into the contemplative realm but also understands some of the complexity of human psychology and knows they need a guide for both can find a solid one here.

[Brieanna · Rating 5 out of 5]

On the cover of the book it says “Solid food for the heart and mind to savor slowly.”<—This is true. I’d give this book 4.5 stars. The only reason for the half point deduction is the long-windedness and repetitiveness of some of the points. Over 300 pages and just 11 chapters—you do need to plan time to adequately wrap your mind around each chapter.

In this book, I feel like the one element that May continues to direct your attention toward is living in the mystery and question of all that we do not know. That the Ultimate Truth of things will never be known to us, and therefore, that’s part of the beauty of life—the mystery! He weaves in and out of all sorts of thoughts and ideas about psychology, spirituality, and “knowing” God.

He discusses why psychology can be a part of spirituality but spirituality is not of psychology. There is a respect, curiosity and passion behind his words. He speaks of the variety of spiritual disciplines with great regard. He doesn’t prescribe a moral code or agenda here. It is instead a discussion, a consideration of ideas.

The only thing we can be sure of is that we are uncertain. I love that he says we cannot know God in totality, but in parts, not in image, but in presence and awareness to what is. There is a lot of talk about love and what it means to experience divine love or Unitarian love, “agape”.

If you have the time and patience and enjoy contemplating psychological or spiritual matters, I’d recommend this book.

[Jreader · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was warmly recommended by Kelly Koerner, a DBT trainer (which greatly minimizes her contribution and accomplishments). It took me probably 3 months to get through because I read a few pages a day.

Couldn't get through Thomas Merton, but plowed through this. It's a religious philosophy book bringing mindfulness to the psychology discussion. So, of course I googled the connection with Gerald May and Marsha Linehan and yes! there it is. Marsha Linehan received instruction from Gerald May. When you think of how we are so integrated, how much psychotherapy has changed in the past 40 years it is amazing to come across this--it's almost like realizing there was a parallel universe influencing what is now my life.

It's a hard read. Do it anyway. Game of Thrones is done. You have time.

[Lance Bolay · Rating 4 out of 5]

May's thoughts on surrender and responsibility in the last chapter are very helpful. "The paradox of spiritual surrender is that in giving oneself fully, one finds not passivity but intimate involvement, not restrictiveness but endless freedom, not blameless quietude but the deepest possible sense of responsibility." For those interested in the contemplative and/or apophatic approaches to spiritual formation, this is important to remember.

[Anita · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is packed and deep and I think it is very real. It travels between psychology and spirituality and he uses the word "God" quite a bit. The thing is that he is not talking about any image of God but about something unimaginable and mysterious, and I don't think one need be a theist to find meaning in the spirituality aspect of the book. And there is a lot to be gained in the psychology aspect. These two aspects do intertwine rather than being separated into chapters or parts. There is a chapter on energy being manifested in the body which I am planning to study, because it seemed to be so helpful in how to look at emotions and get down to the level of their energy rather than just experiencing our interpretation of them. That is something that seems so unifying to me and I need to read that chapter again until I get it.

I originally got this book from the Internet Open Library which gives scanned images of the pages, but it was so good that I decided to buy the ebook knowing I would be reading it again and make notes.

[Andrew McHenry · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was assigned reading when I was in seminary nearly 30 years ago, but I just finished reading all of it today. May's articulation of the distinction between willfulness and willingness has always stuck with me. It's very useful in all sorts of ways. Much of the rest of the book has an excessive focus on unitive experiences - with a lot of theological assumptions that draw from Buddhism. Though he claims to approach his psychology from a Christian perspective, this work seems to draw more from the eastern religions that depict salvation as the dissolving of self into some larger unity (which, interestingly, accords well with the annihilationist view of hell that a minority of Christians espouse). The content really varies in quality. Some of it is very insightful. Other parts are not well-suited for an approach that's particularly Christian - in my opinion.

[Debra · Rating 2 out of 5]

Too obtuse and too much psychology for this reader.

[Sandy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book has some good ideas, but its model of the personality is limiting and negative. His means of accessing the divine is inspiring and thought-provoking; but he doesn't give the practical advantages of moving throughout personality states to have a more balanced approach to the divine within. I like the way he says that we are already found and therefore we seek.

[Bob · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best understanding of the interaction of spirituality and psychology and of how true love works.