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First published May 27, 2017
What if, with Christopher, I could burn the world down when I needed to, and he could extinguish a spot for us in the center of it, carve out a safe place for us while the fire raged outside.
"Christopher wants to be loved(...)And he wants to be needed.It's what he's always wanted(...)"
"In cooking, you can swap out one ingredient for another. Sometimes it doesn't change much, like oil for eggs in a cake. Sometimes it changes everything, like salt for sugar. The way I feel about you? It's not like a recipe. I don't want to swap out your moodiness for a smile, or your temper for a laugh. It's like...alchemy or something. The way people come together, and it's just...Magic."
We were learning each other in small, manageable pieces - mapping each new inch of terrain slowly, to see how far into each other's territory we could venture.
...Fear that someday I'd get so lonely I'd compromise in ways I didn't want to. Fear that I'd be so afraid of compromising when I shouldn't that I'd refuse to compromise when I should.
He had a fantastic laugh - loud and rich and from the belly, and it terminated in a kind of chuckle, like he wasn't quite ready to stop yet. It was the kind of laugh that made you feel lucky that you said something he thought was funny.
What if, with Christopher, I could burn the world down when I needed to, and he could extinguish a spot for us in the center of it, carve out a safe place for us while the fire raged outside.
"Care bear stares"
What do you do when the person you're falling in love with is conflicted about being with you?
Dude, I'm-I'm fucking smitten. Yeah, who says shit like that? I don't know. Me, apparently.
"Girl, get a grip. That shit is made to order. Don't no one have 'extra sandwiches.' He brings those damn things to have an excuse to hang out with your obtuse ass."
"I know," I'd mumbled.