***Spoilers included***
So, this wasn’t the best book I’ve ever read, or even one of the best thrillers I’ve read, but it did have potential. Kind of like when an AP student writes a timed essay. It won’t showcase developed writing skill, but it will check off boxes and “pass.” I chose to read it because it was at a used bookstore and I had credit. As far as a “free” book goes, I’m ok with spending my time reading it, but if I’d paid for it, I would have thought it a waste of money.
Plot: Former tv host turned pseudo detective for a reality show, Martha, decides to investigate the disappearance of her childhood friend, Juliet. She thinks she is mailing a letter to their other childhood friend, Liv, to help, but instead the letter gets into the hands of the new buyer “Casey” who pretends to be Liv out of what appears to be loneliness and boredom, but reveals itself to be obsession. A lot of secrets get revealed, including the fact that a lifelong anorexic, Hattie/Janet (Casey/Katherine’s mother and David’s wife) has killed multiple people in her life, including Juliet, somehow manages to have the strength to keep killing people.
I feel like making Hattie the killer was a dull, overused choice. Sure, I didn’t suspect her as much as other people, but I also didn’t care when it was revealed. I was actually hoping Liv was the killer. I somehow picked up that Juliet and Liv were having a sexual relationship early on, possibly from the clue of her father saying she was never interested in boys (which doesn’t mean you’re gay, but I had a feeling on this), so I was hoping Liv was the killer. Frankly, there were so many other scenarios that could have made this more interesting, but instead we were stuck with over half the book being about droll Martha lusting after her colleague and being upset that she sucks as a detective, which she does! She was never actually a detective! I’m also concerned as to why producers would think allowing someone so close to the events to spearhead an investigation was smart.
The book was also pretty slow. It opens up with a death, then spends a lot of time setting everything up with characters going to have mini interviews with people or spy on each other.
My favorite character was Casey/Katherine. Since her POV is in first person, it is easier to implement characterization. She really had the most detail and her introspective parts were also the most well-written. Her experiences were also the most interesting, with being singled out as “the one” that was persecuted early on, growing up with a mentally ill mother, and suffering from anxiety. She was also pretty funny, with her fantasies of being with the delivery guy and the word choice Ashdown uses for her thoughts: “I add, lest he think I’m a big, fat greedy pig. Which I am!” (238). I do think Ashdown has potential as a writer because she encapsulated the effects of loneliness and mental instability so well. But unfortunately this book also had to be about Martha, who no one cares about.
Another issue I had was Martha not remembering her own obsession with David. Ashdown tries to explain it as some kind of buried shame, but I have no trouble remembering experiences from high school. Granted, I never wanted to seduce a married older man, but I still find it harder to believe.
This book is only ok because of Casey’s character.