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Understanding Arabs: A Guide for Westerners
When Understanding Arabs was first published in 1987, Westerners knew very little about the complex world of Arab culture, where everything seems so unpredictable, but where in fact the deep culture remains remarkably constant.
In this revised edition, Dr. Nydell has given particular attention to the larger framework of Arab culture and to each of the nineteen Arab countries, carefully updating and annotating trends and events. This includes sixty new citations chronicling the tremendous changes that have taken place in the last decade. Dr. Nydell is particularly attentive to the rising tide of fundamentalism that has swept Muslim countries; she comments on the great impact it has had in the Arab World, from women s dress to education to increased wariness of the West and criticism of Western values and behavior. The author has added an addendum addressing the events of September 11, 2001.
In this revised edition, Dr. Nydell has given particular attention to the larger framework of Arab culture and to each of the nineteen Arab countries, carefully updating and annotating trends and events. This includes sixty new citations chronicling the tremendous changes that have taken place in the last decade. Dr. Nydell is particularly attentive to the rising tide of fundamentalism that has swept Muslim countries; she comments on the great impact it has had in the Arab World, from women s dress to education to increased wariness of the West and criticism of Western values and behavior. The author has added an addendum addressing the events of September 11, 2001.
Understanding Arabs provides a cross-cultural guide for foreigners who are living in an Arab country, who encounter Arabs frequently in the Arab World or in the West, or who are interested in Arab culture and sensibilities.
In early chapters Dr. Nydell examines the Arab personality in a cultural context that is comprehensible to foreigners yet not stereotypical. She looks at friendship patterns, attitudes toward strangers, hospitality, differences in ways of thinking, the value placed upon the expression of emotion, and relationships between men and women. Later chapters address broad societal structures including social classes, the family, religion, language and communication.
Margaret K. (Omar) Nydell received her Ph.D. in linguistics and her master s degree in Arabic from Georgetown University. She is an experienced trainer and Arabist who has directed Arabic language training at the Foreign Service Institute of the U.S. State Department and the School of Arabic Language and Area Studies in Tunis. Dr. Nydell has also written several books on the Arabic language and lectured extensively on Arab culture.
192 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2002
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August 10, 2015
This is an awful book. It (the fifth edition, from 2012) contains a tiny bit of apparently useful information, which may or may not be true or generally applicable, combined with heaps of mendacious propaganda and annoying hectoring, padded out with material yanked from the likes of Wikipedia. If you’re relying on it to help you, say, understand Arabs, I doubt very much if it will do that. If you are looking for accurate historical information or informed commentary on Islam, a major focus of the book, you should run away as fast as you can.
I read this book because I was simultaneously reading Muhammad Asad’s The Road To Mecca, an outstanding conversion memoir/travelogue, and I hoped Nydell’s book might complement it. My hopes were grossly misplaced. The target audience for this book, according the back blurb, is “diplomats, scholars, business people, travelers and all those who wish to understand the complex events playing out on the world stage.” If you’re one of those people, you’d be better off reading nothing.
Nydell has two fundamental goals, as far as I can tell, in this book. The prime one is to defend Arab/Muslim culture against what she views as Western ignorance and slurs. Unfortunately, what she defends is not the rich and textured cultural and theological history of Islam; it is the worst aspects of revivalist traditional Islam, along with various pernicious religio-cultural practices of Arabs. Nydell’s second goal is to persuade the reader that Arab societies should be viewed optimistically, and therefore any (minor, in her view) defects overlooked. Somewhere after those goals is, perhaps, a minor goal to actually inform the reader about how to understand Arabs. But even there, Nydell’s goal, by her own admission, is not to help the reader understand all Arabs—merely a tiny slice of educated Arabs (“businessmen and women, bureaucrats, managers, scientists, professors, military officers, lawyers, banking officials and intellectuals”). Even if Nydell did help us understand this slice of Arabs, we’d be a long, long way from “understanding Arabs.”
Nydell begins the book with a long and tendentious “Message From The Author.” By the very second sentence, she gives her game away—“Since [I wrote the first edition], the world has been bombarded with conflicting images of Arab culture, from planes flying into the World Trade Center to Arabs crying in grief over the actions of their extremist counterparts . . . .” If there are lots of images of Arabs crying in grief over September 11, I and everyone else have somehow missed them, even though if there actually were a single one it would be played on a continuous loop by the media to provide balance and try to prevent “Islamophobia,” at the same time actual images of Americans dying on September 11 would continue to be suppressed, as they are, also to prevent “Islamophobia.”
One of Nydell’s failures is that despite constantly talking about Islam, she utterly fails to even lay the basic groundwork for understanding Islam, not explaining that the Qur’an is only a small part of theological guidance for Muslims, most of which is actually based on the voluminous Sunnah, the practices and sayings recorded about Muhammad and his companions. (She mentions hadith once or twice, without explanation of their role.) She instead pulls the mendacious Karen Armstrong trick of falsely analogizing the role of the Bible in Christianity to that of the Qur’an in Islam, and stating that if something isn’t in the Qur’an, it’s not Islamic but cultural, when in fact it’s the Sunnah that’s relevant and controlling of Muslim behavior. Nydell uses this trick to explain away the less pleasant parts of Islam, so it’s pretty clear that her failure to explain the basics of Islam is deliberate, not just another example of sloppy writing.
Nydell then spends several pages praising the so-called Arab Spring and events in Egypt, Tunisia and Libya. “The Arab Spring has been effective, as the people aspire to create more representative governments.” Unfortunately, of course, the time since Nydell wrote this has shown what a disaster the Arab Spring was for all the countries concerned, which strongly suggests that representative government is not something that has any role, now or ever, in the Arab world. And in the same paragraph, Nydell contradicts herself, admitting openly that what most Arabs want is not representative government, but Islamism—i.e.., a totalitarian Islamic theocracy. Which, of course, we are well on our way to getting everywhere but Egypt, preceded by the dogs of war, accompanied by the extermination of Jewish and Christian communities thousands of years old, and doubtless followed by new decades or centuries of darkness. Nydell, however, failed to see any of this, because her view is that Arabs are poor, misunderstood people Just Like Us Except Not (whom she doesn’t try very hard to help us understand).
Nydell’s book is filled with unintentionally hilarious howlers, all designed to defend not actual, demonstrable Muslim contributions to global culture and theology, of which there are plenty, but instead to pretend Muslims are more virtuous than Westerners (i.e., Americans). “Muslims have no historical grievance against Jews and did not engage in periodic persecutions as happened repeatedly in Europe.” Apparently Nydell has missed most of Muslim history, such as Muhammad slaughtering the captured-in-battle Jewish Banu Qurayza tribe in 627 and the Muslim extermination of the Jewish kingdoms of the Yemen, along with continuous Ottoman and Mamluk pogroms, and is not aware of the many proscriptions against Jews in the Qur’an and the Sunnah. “I have never heard an Arab or a Muslim say anything negative about the Jewish faith, or Jews as a people, except in the context of Israel and its policies.” This seems highly unlikely, unless Nydell spends all her time in Arab countries in a Four Seasons. “Both [Christianity and Islam] have a concept of Holy War—Crusade and Jihad.” This is just a dumb lie to confuse the ignorant—jihad, in the form of warfare against enemies of Islam (sometimes confined to self-defense, defined extremely broadly) is an absolutely central part of Islam; the Crusades were a brief efflorescence of warfare for 100 years, highly controversial among Christians even at the time, and having nothing to do with Christian doctrine at all. The howlers go on and on.
Nydell, of course, refuses to ever consider that any Arab behavior she identifies might be bad (although, of course, she is not shy about identifying many non-Arab behaviors as bad). So, she says, “Arabs consciously reserve the right to look at the world in a subjective way, particularly if a more objective assessment of a situation would bring to mind a too-painful truth.” Another way of saying this would be “Arabs are fabulists, who create and repeat lies so they can ignore reality.” If that’s the way your culture is, that’s the way your culture is, but let’s not pretend that’s anything but a bad way to live, and a way that’s likely to ensure your culture remains undeveloped and ignorant.
Or, “Arabs like to talk politics with Westerners, and they will readily bring up controversial topics like the Palestine issue, the Iraq wars, and the legacies of colonialism and imperialism. Yet they are not prepared for frank statements of disagreement with their positions on these questions or even inadvertent comments that sound negative toward their point of view or supportive of the opposing side of the argument.” In other words, Arabs don’t like to talk politics at all with Westerners—they like to hector Westerners (read: Americans) with their (illogical, irrational and fabulist) political views, and the Westerner BETTER NOT dare to say anything at all that any person, no matter how irrational, could EVER interpret as anything but TOTAL AGREEMENT. Sure, this is one way to live. But it’s a stupid way to live.
This is such a target rich environment I’m going to have to cut myself off. But one last example. Nydell claims there is a groundswell in the Arab world in favor of “modern concepts on issues such as slavery and women’s rights,” and that there is no support in the Qur’an for slavery and denial of rights to women. She simultaneously contradicts herself by defensively (and heretically, to a Muslim) claiming that the Qur’an “is a product of its times” and “obscure and unclear” (although the Qur’an and Sunnah are actually very clear that slavery is just fine and always will be, and the women’s rights are severely limited and immutable). Nydell than claims that things are changing because “There is a project to retranslate the Qur’an in light of modern academic scholarship, which is yielding interpretations in keeping with ‘the ethics of the modern age’ and fighting against culture practices that are justified as religious.” (She does not explain the contradiction of how it can be that if the practices are changed by a retranslation of the Qur’an, they could be merely cultural, rather than religious, in foundation.) Her evidence is a cite to a 2007 New York Times article profiling the decision by Laleh Bakhtiar, in her translation of the Qur’an, to translate Qur’an 4:34, the verse authorizing beating of wives by their husbands, universally translated to mean beat or strike, as “make go away.” As they say, wishing doesn’t make it so, and there is exactly zero evidence of any real “projects to retranslate the Qur’an.” In fact, what little critical exegesis and historical analysis of the Qur’an is done has to be done under psuedonyms, because death is a real risk for anyone daring to approach the Qur’an as the Bible has been approached since the 19th century. Plenty of people (including Muhammad Asad) have made tentative steps toward modernizing Islam, which is difficult to do for structural reasons. But none of these have made any relevant headway, and Nydell is merely claiming they have to make Americans like Arabs more.
In fact, things are generally heading the other way with Islam. Nydell repeatedly notes the that Arabs over past decades have moved rapidly to adopt more traditional forms of Islam, away from any attempt at modernity. She never attempts to explain this move, or how it squares with her other claims of modernizing.
Nydell repeatedly celebrates the supposed Arab contrast with the West, in that Arabs supposedly are not obsessed with “getting ahead” like Westerners (by which she means, again, Americans), but instead are traditional, family focused, and fatalistic. This may be a superior way to live and plenty of Westerners have mourned the loss of community in the West and our many, many pathologies, some of which the Arab world has so far successfully avoided. But Nydell pretends you can have it both ways—have an advanced Western economy, but not adopt Western habits of striving. It’s a commonplace that most Arab countries, except those with oil, are underdeveloped and on the wrong side of the “Great Divergence” among rich and poor countries. What Nydell ignores is that within living memory, all Arabs lived in abject poverty. Oil/gas, combined with huge handouts from the United State to countries like Egypt with little oil, are the only reason there’s been any economic advancement at all. This suggests the traditional culture is not amenable to advancement.
The middle third of the book is (finally) devoted to the specifics of Arab culture, with an eye to understanding. This covers general topics in extremely short chapters such as “Arab values,” friendship, emotion, male/female relationships, social structure and formalities, and so forth. Most of this will come as no surprise to all to anyone who is reasonably well read in newspapers and books, and there is little depth, but it’s nice to have collected in one place (although, of course, by the author’s own admission much of this applies only to a tiny slice of Arabs). And, of course, even this section is shot through with apologetics for bad behavior and customs that Westerners generally find abhorrent, while the author simultaneously finds frequent occasion to criticize non-Arabs.
Even Nydell’s explanations of Arab customs which may be helpful to a Western visitor are bowdlerized. For example, she notes in several places the custom of eating with the right hand, the left hand being considered unclean in Arab societies. This is well known, but Nydell never notes why this is (it is because the left hand is frequently used instead of toilet paper, and more generally Islam tends to view the left hand as the one to be used for any “less honorable” activity). Presumably Nydell doesn’t note this because most Americans would find it unpleasant and therefore find it confirms their prejudices, and Nydell is desperate to prevent any confirmation of prejudice, even if wholly justified by the facts. Similarly, Nydell whitewashes that in the Arab world divorce of women by men is common and socially unexceptional, and in fact frequently men serially marry wives and divorce them, and that women essentially cannot divorce men, both in Islam and because of cultural rules. She simply pretends that really women are essentially equal to men in the matter of divorce.
There are many lesser problems with the book. Nydell is addicted to constantly using italics, which quickly gets very irritating. And so on—but enough piling on.
Having quickly disposed of the task of skimming actual Arab culture, Nydell proceeds to hector us some more with long sections on “Anti-Americanism,” by which she means how Arabs aren’t anti-American, except when they are, and then it’s our fault, and by the way Americans are terrible bigots who need to be educated by those nice Arabs. Then a set of chapters on “Muslims in the West,” wherein Western bigotry is again excoriated and Muslims are claimed to be model citizens in Europe (never mind the sky-high crime rates, with more than half of the criminals in jail in France being Muslim, and the hundreds of thousands of girls subjected to genital mutilation, none of which, or anything else that might take away from Nydell’s vision of happy Arab multiculturalism opposed by Western bigots, is mentioned).
Nydell finally ends her offenses to the reader by padding out the rest of the book, having the final third of the book be a country-by-country description of each of 18 Arab countries, with basic factually information, liberally cribbed from Wikipedia (which is repeatedly cited), Encarta and various blog and newspaper articles. And, finally, Nydell concludes with an injunction that for Westerners, “All that is necessary is to be nonjudgmental and to avoid any actions that are insulting or shocking,” (because, apparently, Arabs don’t have to be nonjudgmental), and that Westerners must not be “open and upfront with beliefs and feelings,” because this “needs to be tempered when operating in the tradition-bound culture of the Middle East.” In other words, stupid American, keep your mouth shut and your mind closed to the possibility that retrograde behavior is retrograde, and the Arabs won’t hurt you.
I read this book because I was simultaneously reading Muhammad Asad’s The Road To Mecca, an outstanding conversion memoir/travelogue, and I hoped Nydell’s book might complement it. My hopes were grossly misplaced. The target audience for this book, according the back blurb, is “diplomats, scholars, business people, travelers and all those who wish to understand the complex events playing out on the world stage.” If you’re one of those people, you’d be better off reading nothing.
Nydell has two fundamental goals, as far as I can tell, in this book. The prime one is to defend Arab/Muslim culture against what she views as Western ignorance and slurs. Unfortunately, what she defends is not the rich and textured cultural and theological history of Islam; it is the worst aspects of revivalist traditional Islam, along with various pernicious religio-cultural practices of Arabs. Nydell’s second goal is to persuade the reader that Arab societies should be viewed optimistically, and therefore any (minor, in her view) defects overlooked. Somewhere after those goals is, perhaps, a minor goal to actually inform the reader about how to understand Arabs. But even there, Nydell’s goal, by her own admission, is not to help the reader understand all Arabs—merely a tiny slice of educated Arabs (“businessmen and women, bureaucrats, managers, scientists, professors, military officers, lawyers, banking officials and intellectuals”). Even if Nydell did help us understand this slice of Arabs, we’d be a long, long way from “understanding Arabs.”
Nydell begins the book with a long and tendentious “Message From The Author.” By the very second sentence, she gives her game away—“Since [I wrote the first edition], the world has been bombarded with conflicting images of Arab culture, from planes flying into the World Trade Center to Arabs crying in grief over the actions of their extremist counterparts . . . .” If there are lots of images of Arabs crying in grief over September 11, I and everyone else have somehow missed them, even though if there actually were a single one it would be played on a continuous loop by the media to provide balance and try to prevent “Islamophobia,” at the same time actual images of Americans dying on September 11 would continue to be suppressed, as they are, also to prevent “Islamophobia.”
One of Nydell’s failures is that despite constantly talking about Islam, she utterly fails to even lay the basic groundwork for understanding Islam, not explaining that the Qur’an is only a small part of theological guidance for Muslims, most of which is actually based on the voluminous Sunnah, the practices and sayings recorded about Muhammad and his companions. (She mentions hadith once or twice, without explanation of their role.) She instead pulls the mendacious Karen Armstrong trick of falsely analogizing the role of the Bible in Christianity to that of the Qur’an in Islam, and stating that if something isn’t in the Qur’an, it’s not Islamic but cultural, when in fact it’s the Sunnah that’s relevant and controlling of Muslim behavior. Nydell uses this trick to explain away the less pleasant parts of Islam, so it’s pretty clear that her failure to explain the basics of Islam is deliberate, not just another example of sloppy writing.
Nydell then spends several pages praising the so-called Arab Spring and events in Egypt, Tunisia and Libya. “The Arab Spring has been effective, as the people aspire to create more representative governments.” Unfortunately, of course, the time since Nydell wrote this has shown what a disaster the Arab Spring was for all the countries concerned, which strongly suggests that representative government is not something that has any role, now or ever, in the Arab world. And in the same paragraph, Nydell contradicts herself, admitting openly that what most Arabs want is not representative government, but Islamism—i.e.., a totalitarian Islamic theocracy. Which, of course, we are well on our way to getting everywhere but Egypt, preceded by the dogs of war, accompanied by the extermination of Jewish and Christian communities thousands of years old, and doubtless followed by new decades or centuries of darkness. Nydell, however, failed to see any of this, because her view is that Arabs are poor, misunderstood people Just Like Us Except Not (whom she doesn’t try very hard to help us understand).
Nydell’s book is filled with unintentionally hilarious howlers, all designed to defend not actual, demonstrable Muslim contributions to global culture and theology, of which there are plenty, but instead to pretend Muslims are more virtuous than Westerners (i.e., Americans). “Muslims have no historical grievance against Jews and did not engage in periodic persecutions as happened repeatedly in Europe.” Apparently Nydell has missed most of Muslim history, such as Muhammad slaughtering the captured-in-battle Jewish Banu Qurayza tribe in 627 and the Muslim extermination of the Jewish kingdoms of the Yemen, along with continuous Ottoman and Mamluk pogroms, and is not aware of the many proscriptions against Jews in the Qur’an and the Sunnah. “I have never heard an Arab or a Muslim say anything negative about the Jewish faith, or Jews as a people, except in the context of Israel and its policies.” This seems highly unlikely, unless Nydell spends all her time in Arab countries in a Four Seasons. “Both [Christianity and Islam] have a concept of Holy War—Crusade and Jihad.” This is just a dumb lie to confuse the ignorant—jihad, in the form of warfare against enemies of Islam (sometimes confined to self-defense, defined extremely broadly) is an absolutely central part of Islam; the Crusades were a brief efflorescence of warfare for 100 years, highly controversial among Christians even at the time, and having nothing to do with Christian doctrine at all. The howlers go on and on.
Nydell, of course, refuses to ever consider that any Arab behavior she identifies might be bad (although, of course, she is not shy about identifying many non-Arab behaviors as bad). So, she says, “Arabs consciously reserve the right to look at the world in a subjective way, particularly if a more objective assessment of a situation would bring to mind a too-painful truth.” Another way of saying this would be “Arabs are fabulists, who create and repeat lies so they can ignore reality.” If that’s the way your culture is, that’s the way your culture is, but let’s not pretend that’s anything but a bad way to live, and a way that’s likely to ensure your culture remains undeveloped and ignorant.
Or, “Arabs like to talk politics with Westerners, and they will readily bring up controversial topics like the Palestine issue, the Iraq wars, and the legacies of colonialism and imperialism. Yet they are not prepared for frank statements of disagreement with their positions on these questions or even inadvertent comments that sound negative toward their point of view or supportive of the opposing side of the argument.” In other words, Arabs don’t like to talk politics at all with Westerners—they like to hector Westerners (read: Americans) with their (illogical, irrational and fabulist) political views, and the Westerner BETTER NOT dare to say anything at all that any person, no matter how irrational, could EVER interpret as anything but TOTAL AGREEMENT. Sure, this is one way to live. But it’s a stupid way to live.
This is such a target rich environment I’m going to have to cut myself off. But one last example. Nydell claims there is a groundswell in the Arab world in favor of “modern concepts on issues such as slavery and women’s rights,” and that there is no support in the Qur’an for slavery and denial of rights to women. She simultaneously contradicts herself by defensively (and heretically, to a Muslim) claiming that the Qur’an “is a product of its times” and “obscure and unclear” (although the Qur’an and Sunnah are actually very clear that slavery is just fine and always will be, and the women’s rights are severely limited and immutable). Nydell than claims that things are changing because “There is a project to retranslate the Qur’an in light of modern academic scholarship, which is yielding interpretations in keeping with ‘the ethics of the modern age’ and fighting against culture practices that are justified as religious.” (She does not explain the contradiction of how it can be that if the practices are changed by a retranslation of the Qur’an, they could be merely cultural, rather than religious, in foundation.) Her evidence is a cite to a 2007 New York Times article profiling the decision by Laleh Bakhtiar, in her translation of the Qur’an, to translate Qur’an 4:34, the verse authorizing beating of wives by their husbands, universally translated to mean beat or strike, as “make go away.” As they say, wishing doesn’t make it so, and there is exactly zero evidence of any real “projects to retranslate the Qur’an.” In fact, what little critical exegesis and historical analysis of the Qur’an is done has to be done under psuedonyms, because death is a real risk for anyone daring to approach the Qur’an as the Bible has been approached since the 19th century. Plenty of people (including Muhammad Asad) have made tentative steps toward modernizing Islam, which is difficult to do for structural reasons. But none of these have made any relevant headway, and Nydell is merely claiming they have to make Americans like Arabs more.
In fact, things are generally heading the other way with Islam. Nydell repeatedly notes the that Arabs over past decades have moved rapidly to adopt more traditional forms of Islam, away from any attempt at modernity. She never attempts to explain this move, or how it squares with her other claims of modernizing.
Nydell repeatedly celebrates the supposed Arab contrast with the West, in that Arabs supposedly are not obsessed with “getting ahead” like Westerners (by which she means, again, Americans), but instead are traditional, family focused, and fatalistic. This may be a superior way to live and plenty of Westerners have mourned the loss of community in the West and our many, many pathologies, some of which the Arab world has so far successfully avoided. But Nydell pretends you can have it both ways—have an advanced Western economy, but not adopt Western habits of striving. It’s a commonplace that most Arab countries, except those with oil, are underdeveloped and on the wrong side of the “Great Divergence” among rich and poor countries. What Nydell ignores is that within living memory, all Arabs lived in abject poverty. Oil/gas, combined with huge handouts from the United State to countries like Egypt with little oil, are the only reason there’s been any economic advancement at all. This suggests the traditional culture is not amenable to advancement.
The middle third of the book is (finally) devoted to the specifics of Arab culture, with an eye to understanding. This covers general topics in extremely short chapters such as “Arab values,” friendship, emotion, male/female relationships, social structure and formalities, and so forth. Most of this will come as no surprise to all to anyone who is reasonably well read in newspapers and books, and there is little depth, but it’s nice to have collected in one place (although, of course, by the author’s own admission much of this applies only to a tiny slice of Arabs). And, of course, even this section is shot through with apologetics for bad behavior and customs that Westerners generally find abhorrent, while the author simultaneously finds frequent occasion to criticize non-Arabs.
Even Nydell’s explanations of Arab customs which may be helpful to a Western visitor are bowdlerized. For example, she notes in several places the custom of eating with the right hand, the left hand being considered unclean in Arab societies. This is well known, but Nydell never notes why this is (it is because the left hand is frequently used instead of toilet paper, and more generally Islam tends to view the left hand as the one to be used for any “less honorable” activity). Presumably Nydell doesn’t note this because most Americans would find it unpleasant and therefore find it confirms their prejudices, and Nydell is desperate to prevent any confirmation of prejudice, even if wholly justified by the facts. Similarly, Nydell whitewashes that in the Arab world divorce of women by men is common and socially unexceptional, and in fact frequently men serially marry wives and divorce them, and that women essentially cannot divorce men, both in Islam and because of cultural rules. She simply pretends that really women are essentially equal to men in the matter of divorce.
There are many lesser problems with the book. Nydell is addicted to constantly using italics, which quickly gets very irritating. And so on—but enough piling on.
Having quickly disposed of the task of skimming actual Arab culture, Nydell proceeds to hector us some more with long sections on “Anti-Americanism,” by which she means how Arabs aren’t anti-American, except when they are, and then it’s our fault, and by the way Americans are terrible bigots who need to be educated by those nice Arabs. Then a set of chapters on “Muslims in the West,” wherein Western bigotry is again excoriated and Muslims are claimed to be model citizens in Europe (never mind the sky-high crime rates, with more than half of the criminals in jail in France being Muslim, and the hundreds of thousands of girls subjected to genital mutilation, none of which, or anything else that might take away from Nydell’s vision of happy Arab multiculturalism opposed by Western bigots, is mentioned).
Nydell finally ends her offenses to the reader by padding out the rest of the book, having the final third of the book be a country-by-country description of each of 18 Arab countries, with basic factually information, liberally cribbed from Wikipedia (which is repeatedly cited), Encarta and various blog and newspaper articles. And, finally, Nydell concludes with an injunction that for Westerners, “All that is necessary is to be nonjudgmental and to avoid any actions that are insulting or shocking,” (because, apparently, Arabs don’t have to be nonjudgmental), and that Westerners must not be “open and upfront with beliefs and feelings,” because this “needs to be tempered when operating in the tradition-bound culture of the Middle East.” In other words, stupid American, keep your mouth shut and your mind closed to the possibility that retrograde behavior is retrograde, and the Arabs won’t hurt you.
July 31, 2012
(Reprinted from the Chicago Center for Literature and Photography [cclapcenter.com]. I am the original author of this essay, as well as the owner of CCLaP; it is not being reprinted illegally.)
This is one of those books about foreign culture that I like the best, where someone will both detail the various things that everyday people in another area of the world might do that might seem strange to us Americans, and explain why they do them; and it's especially fascinating in this case, because of covering the "Arab World," which like the "Islamic World" is a term mostly made up by Westerners to try to easily explain something that doesn't have an easy explanation. (Think for example of mashing together Irish, Latin and African Catholics, in order to explain in a single short statement the "Christian World.") And indeed, that's one of the first things that scholar Margaret K. Nydell makes clear, that there's a difference between Arab society and Islamic society, with there being a lot of overlap for sure but some very specific differences too; and that's basically the start of a long and informing look at all the normal parts of Arab life that might seem weird to us, from the routine overuse of both praise and damnation to the sometimes draconian dress codes of some nations, why straight men hold hands in public but not men and women, and a lot more. Now in its fifth edition, this is a lively anecdotal guide that will help clueless Americans like me to better understand and appreciate their Arab neighbors, and comes strongly recommended to those even with just a passing interest.
Out of 10: 8.8
This is one of those books about foreign culture that I like the best, where someone will both detail the various things that everyday people in another area of the world might do that might seem strange to us Americans, and explain why they do them; and it's especially fascinating in this case, because of covering the "Arab World," which like the "Islamic World" is a term mostly made up by Westerners to try to easily explain something that doesn't have an easy explanation. (Think for example of mashing together Irish, Latin and African Catholics, in order to explain in a single short statement the "Christian World.") And indeed, that's one of the first things that scholar Margaret K. Nydell makes clear, that there's a difference between Arab society and Islamic society, with there being a lot of overlap for sure but some very specific differences too; and that's basically the start of a long and informing look at all the normal parts of Arab life that might seem weird to us, from the routine overuse of both praise and damnation to the sometimes draconian dress codes of some nations, why straight men hold hands in public but not men and women, and a lot more. Now in its fifth edition, this is a lively anecdotal guide that will help clueless Americans like me to better understand and appreciate their Arab neighbors, and comes strongly recommended to those even with just a passing interest.
Out of 10: 8.8
January 8, 2010
The title of this book made me hesitant to read it, despite the great reviews by prominent Middle East scholars. I finally decided to read it after hearing Ms. Nydell talk about her extensive research on colloquial Arabic. I realized she was the real deal.
She gives an excellent overview of Arab and Muslim cultural norms and mindsets in the Arab world. This isn't your run of the mill, antiquated, presumptive, fearmongering, Islamophobic manifestation of the beloved War on Terror that we are so used to seeing in bookstores. Margaret Nydell knows her stuff. If you really want to understand the Arab world, start by reading this book.
She gives an excellent overview of Arab and Muslim cultural norms and mindsets in the Arab world. This isn't your run of the mill, antiquated, presumptive, fearmongering, Islamophobic manifestation of the beloved War on Terror that we are so used to seeing in bookstores. Margaret Nydell knows her stuff. If you really want to understand the Arab world, start by reading this book.
July 10, 2019
I was looking for an answer for a question: Are there any books that would explain Arabs to Non-Arabic audience without any stereotypes? I think this book did a pretty well to give simple ideas and a balance representation of what the Arabs actually are. Unfortunately, many current books about Arabs would talk only about spiritual, historical or political sides of Arabs’ life. I think the readers needs to gain a shed of light on Arabs’ social life, as well.
I like the author’s views about some different aspects of Arabs’ life that I was not aware of. For example, the author understood the idea of friendship between Arabs. You scratch my back, and I'll scratch yours, anytime no apologies accepted !
However, it seems the author had some non-objective view against Saudi Arabia's social life, which is understandable. Probably she has not been there, and she did not encounter Saudis. I encourage the author to give a visit to the Gulf countries and to include an updated version for the her book.
I would recommed this book for reading. This book is very relevant today due to the current loaded social media hate wave and xenophobia and islamophobia.
I hope the author would produce an audible version of the book. I think more readers may enjoy such books in different platforms.
I like the author’s views about some different aspects of Arabs’ life that I was not aware of. For example, the author understood the idea of friendship between Arabs. You scratch my back, and I'll scratch yours, anytime no apologies accepted !
However, it seems the author had some non-objective view against Saudi Arabia's social life, which is understandable. Probably she has not been there, and she did not encounter Saudis. I encourage the author to give a visit to the Gulf countries and to include an updated version for the her book.
I would recommed this book for reading. This book is very relevant today due to the current loaded social media hate wave and xenophobia and islamophobia.
I hope the author would produce an audible version of the book. I think more readers may enjoy such books in different platforms.
May 13, 2018
I found Nydell's work to be overly simplistic to the point of overlooking the complexities of the Arab world. Admittedly, Nydell is writing for business people, not for those who want a panorama of Arabs from all walks of life (not just Arab males). She glances over issues of women's and queer rights, and seems loathe to delve into equally polemic parts of the Arab world. Instead, her advice can come off as naff and generalising. You're better off looking elsewhere if you want a guide to business in the Arab world.
August 9, 2021
This book is a "must-read" if you are ever going to spend time interacting with people in the Arab world. Its an extensive exploration of general Arab customs and mind set. You will discover that they have a very different way of interacting with people that the average Westerner. If you read this book you will gain an understanding how to interact with Arabs without insulting them, and you will also get insight into how they behave in social and business situations and how you should react. There is also discussion of Islamic extremest and how they do not represent the average Arab person.
There is an interesting appendix on the Arabic language and the various dialects.
I read the 4th edition, published in 2006, so things may be a bit out of date.
There is an interesting appendix on the Arabic language and the various dialects.
I read the 4th edition, published in 2006, so things may be a bit out of date.
September 18, 2020
A rather outdated, but still helpful guide to the often misunderstood Arab culture, language, history, and customs.
June 6, 2022
Quite helpful to get one oriented.
December 11, 2019
Great reading. Information is both surprising and solid. Second time reading it. Discovered lots more than anticipated.
March 28, 2016
Professor Nydell does a good job introducing arabic culture to the Americans and Western Europeans, although sometimes she does give more rosy an impression than I have personally experienced after as tolerance goes. This should be taken as well-intentioned counter-balance to a lot of conflation of Arab culture to Islam and a oversimplification of Islam itself. Professor Nydell does, however, often have to be caveats about the nature of Saudi Arabian culture and society in the book where a more austere form of Sunni Islam and a very conservative monarchy play to the most conservative elements in Arab society.
Living in Egypt myself, I found this book most helpful when discussing possible points of miscommunication and mutual misunderstanding of relationships. While Professor Nydell does not talk about honor or shame cultures--to be fair, these cultural archetypes are a bit too broad to be useful--the focus on public and private will be hard for many Anglo-North Americans and Western Europeans to completely understand. Dr. Nydell does not go into how this will be perceived by "Westerner," as it is often see as irrational and nepotistic, and indeed, it often is the latter. That said, understanding the intensity that both social bonds and hospitality play in Arab culture--Christian and Muslim--is vital to understanding some anti-Americanism and mutual miscommunication.
By and large, which a few overly positive generalizations aside, my experience of the slice of the Arab world which I currently live is aided by this book. Although the country profiles in the final chapters due help with breaking some kind traits down, the political information is already out of date only two or three years after the fact due the current breakneck speed of change in the Arab world. Furthermore, the chapters on Islam and Islamism are too basic to be helpful to those who know anything about the subject but probably won't help those who are negatively oriented towards learning about it.
Living in Egypt myself, I found this book most helpful when discussing possible points of miscommunication and mutual misunderstanding of relationships. While Professor Nydell does not talk about honor or shame cultures--to be fair, these cultural archetypes are a bit too broad to be useful--the focus on public and private will be hard for many Anglo-North Americans and Western Europeans to completely understand. Dr. Nydell does not go into how this will be perceived by "Westerner," as it is often see as irrational and nepotistic, and indeed, it often is the latter. That said, understanding the intensity that both social bonds and hospitality play in Arab culture--Christian and Muslim--is vital to understanding some anti-Americanism and mutual miscommunication.
By and large, which a few overly positive generalizations aside, my experience of the slice of the Arab world which I currently live is aided by this book. Although the country profiles in the final chapters due help with breaking some kind traits down, the political information is already out of date only two or three years after the fact due the current breakneck speed of change in the Arab world. Furthermore, the chapters on Islam and Islamism are too basic to be helpful to those who know anything about the subject but probably won't help those who are negatively oriented towards learning about it.
April 7, 2011
This book caught my attention in a library a few weeks before the "Arab Spring", triggered by a vendor's self-immolation. I liked the topic because it makes an attempt to describe the ways of Arabs to the Westerners. I borrowed the book from the library some time later and read the 1987 edition of it, which I suppose may not be as "clean" and politically correct as the later editions. Since I myself come from a culture that bears many similarities with the Arab culture, I found the author's astute observation quite interesting. It's a very small book and it has some appendices about how the Arab countries (and the accents of Arabic in different countries) differ from one another. I recommend this book for anyone who wants to see the world from the point of view of Arabs, but more importantly to Arabs (and Iranians) who like to see how the scholars view them, what they already know and what they don't know yet about us.
August 10, 2016
I think this is the closest book that I have read that describes somehow the Arabic culture. There are some points that were not completely true but I think that is because the author was trying to draw a general picture of Arabs and their culture. That is really difficult to do specially if she is considering all the countries that speak Arabic to be Arabs (which is a valid point). Arabs cultures are very diverse even within the same country.
Another point the author needs to improve, is making sure that she is reporting current traditions.
For me as an Arab the book was actually helpful to understand the US culture better, since she compares it with the Arab culture. It helped me to understand some work and friendship relationships that I found very different from what I’m used to. I actually recommend the book for Arabs who are living in the US more than I recommend it for non-Arabs :)
Another point the author needs to improve, is making sure that she is reporting current traditions.
For me as an Arab the book was actually helpful to understand the US culture better, since she compares it with the Arab culture. It helped me to understand some work and friendship relationships that I found very different from what I’m used to. I actually recommend the book for Arabs who are living in the US more than I recommend it for non-Arabs :)
March 10, 2012
The author makes many broad statements and uses the word "always" a lot in this book, which usually discredits the author. However, having been able to verify first-hand her statements I must agree with most everything she says in this book. For those who wish to understand Arab society and culture, this book is a must-read. The author denounces classic "Arabists" as being too old-fashioned in their thinking to properly analyze modern Arab society and she offers keen insight into the Arab world that spans those who look back at the Middle Ages as the peak of civilization and those who strive to propel the Middle East into the future of technological and economic innovation.
Read
July 15, 2013A good overview of the diverse Arab population, though I don't know how much of it is accurate versus sweeping generalization, or merely the opinion of the author. For that reason, I hesitate to give it a rating. I would like to know what Arabs themselves might think of the book.
I teach English to international students at my university, most of which come from the Middle East, so I appreciate even the merest insight into where my students are coming from culturally. Perhaps this book will help me deal with our mutual culture shock.
I teach English to international students at my university, most of which come from the Middle East, so I appreciate even the merest insight into where my students are coming from culturally. Perhaps this book will help me deal with our mutual culture shock.
June 9, 2009
Pretty patronizing and generalizing. On the other hand, for a book that purports to "explain" Arabs, it's a pretty one-sided book, much more subjective than I would have expected. She put a lot of her own personal comments in there that didn't seem appropriate, as well as things like "Many American students have studied in Lebanon, and find it charming," or something to that effect.
I did learn some things from it though. Yet another book that could have benefited from better editing.
I did learn some things from it though. Yet another book that could have benefited from better editing.
October 5, 2016
I have been living in the middle east for almost 5 years and that was the main reason I grabbed this book. I agree with many things it says for I experienced them, and some others have been eye-opening; however I think that in certain issues the author has an overly rosy vision of the arab world, namely it appears that save for islamism everything would be perfect. there are deep issues in the arab world as well, especially of ethical nature. not all are really looking for the 'just society'
December 4, 2019
This is a guide to all the countries that speak Arabic. Published and updated for over 30 years.
Why I started this book: One of my Professional Reading titles... I'm determined to bring this list under control.
Why I finished it: Short chapters are it's one redeeming quality. This book was written for someone who has never traveled and who relies on FOX News for their world view. It was bad. Ridiculously basic, contradictory and whole book of be nice and realize that other people are different than you with just a little whining, "it's our culture we don't have to change." (Which I agree in principle, but not followed by a "and we don't want to talk about it.") Recommend the Culture Smart introduction to countries instead... Turkey - Culture Smart!: the essential guide to customs & culture or Culture Smart! Egypt: The Essential Guide to Customs & Culture as the Korea - Culture Smart!: The Essential Guide to Culture & Customs was respectful, useful and relevant. Plus the Arab world is so large that there are many local variations that should be explored and understood.
Why I started this book: One of my Professional Reading titles... I'm determined to bring this list under control.
Why I finished it: Short chapters are it's one redeeming quality. This book was written for someone who has never traveled and who relies on FOX News for their world view. It was bad. Ridiculously basic, contradictory and whole book of be nice and realize that other people are different than you with just a little whining, "it's our culture we don't have to change." (Which I agree in principle, but not followed by a "and we don't want to talk about it.") Recommend the Culture Smart introduction to countries instead... Turkey - Culture Smart!: the essential guide to customs & culture or Culture Smart! Egypt: The Essential Guide to Customs & Culture as the Korea - Culture Smart!: The Essential Guide to Culture & Customs was respectful, useful and relevant. Plus the Arab world is so large that there are many local variations that should be explored and understood.
April 15, 2024
with all due respect to the author, who is apparently a very prominent individual who consults with the government often, this book sucks. It opens up by promising no generalizations and then proceeds to read like a conversation with a hyper-conservative uncle at the thanksgiving dinner table. I wish there had been more concrete examples and less “this one time I talked to this guy who new a person that said …” This could have done with a lot of editing, a lot of consultation with more qualified individuals, and a general reframing of the goal of the book. Unfortunately weak- I was hoping for a lot more :(
May 17, 2019
Nydell aims to teach about the different histories, cultures, and even religions among Arab speaking people. She comes off biased and over generalizing at times when writing about both the Middle East and U.S., and fails a couple of times with far fetched comparisons between women's lives in the U.S. and in the MENA region. Still, I can see her motive is to try having us relate. This book teaches about war and politics rooted in current controversies but also how the Middle East is a young population, full of young people that are hell bent on improving their homeland. She talks about innovations, clothing (discussions and input from Arab women on hijab), women's rights, contributions by Arab organizations here in the U.S., and the future for this area of people that just want what most of us do - freedom of speech and movement and to be respected. Her style is not very colorful for writing about such a rich culture. A lot of the book is like a guide on formalities.
November 20, 2024
3.5
i mean it's a little dated.
the writing is catered to an American/western audience, but still read well. Based on facts and dismantling myths. overall pretty good, some generalizations, but the arab world is so incredibly diverse, it would be nearly impossible not to have generalizations.
very very interesting!
i mean it's a little dated.
the writing is catered to an American/western audience, but still read well. Based on facts and dismantling myths. overall pretty good, some generalizations, but the arab world is so incredibly diverse, it would be nearly impossible not to have generalizations.
very very interesting!
February 24, 2019
Written by somebody that does not understand Arabs. Completely orientalist and touristy in a way.
I was ashamed for who ever wrote this, reading this as an Arab was difficult. I have no idea what this lady is talking about.
I was ashamed for who ever wrote this, reading this as an Arab was difficult. I have no idea what this lady is talking about.
March 24, 2019
Far from riveting reading, but it is exactly what the title says. Thus it is a useful volume for someone who has little or no experience with Arabs and is planning a lengthy sojourn to any of the Arabic countries.
March 30, 2024
I read this book for my Arabic 101 class back in college. I remember the facts being interesting, but the presentation being a little dry. Probably more an issue with the genre than the book. It seemed like good information.
May 31, 2017
Informative, though I should have picked up the most recent edition. While much has happened since this book's publication around 2006, much of this info is still pertinent.
September 15, 2020
Visiting Kuwait this fall. I am looking forward to learning more about Arab culture. Great read.
June 15, 2021
nie dowiedziałam się praktycznie niczego + książka bardzo nieobiektywna
July 15, 2022
Great introduction book to Arabs but there is still so many stereotypes in it.
December 29, 2023
Read as a part of my study abroad!
Read
April 20, 2026Great, just needs another update!
January 25, 2017
It gave me a big "aha" moment when I realized how many differences there are between the Arab world and the West.
I was recently unfriended on Facebook by an Arab (also Muslim) friend of mine as a result of an argument about faith and culture. In his last words he stated that I "offended him many times" and I was shocked because we were merely talking about culture and religion and I never addressed him personally. This book explained to me what he meant (turns out that questioning faith may be found offensive (!)) as well as why throughout our discussion, the more objective facts I presented, the more subjective he got. And why he initiated the discussion on religion in the first place.
Some quotes:
"They [Arabs] like to teach about Islam, which eventually leads to the question: why don't you
consider conversion? A Westerner may feel uncomfortable and wonder how to give a gracious refusal. The simplest, most gracious, and most acceptable answer is to state that you appreciate the information and respect Islam highly as a religion but that you cannot consider conversion because it would offend your family.”
"Westerners are taught that objectivity, the examination of facts in a logical way without the intrusion of emotional bias, is the mature and constructive approach to human affairs. One of the results of this belief is that in Western culture, subjectivity' — a willingness to allow personal
feelings and emotions to influence one's view of events — represents immaturity. Arabs believe differently- They place a high value on the display of emotion, sometimes to the embarrassment or discomfort of foreigners. It is not uncommon to hear Westerners label this behavior as immature, imposing their own values on what they have observed."
"Arabs have a great deal of pride and are easily hurt; thus, they are sensitive to any display of arrogance by Westerners and to implied criticisms."
Well, the online friendship is lost, but now I know at least why. I truly recommend the book.
I was recently unfriended on Facebook by an Arab (also Muslim) friend of mine as a result of an argument about faith and culture. In his last words he stated that I "offended him many times" and I was shocked because we were merely talking about culture and religion and I never addressed him personally. This book explained to me what he meant (turns out that questioning faith may be found offensive (!)) as well as why throughout our discussion, the more objective facts I presented, the more subjective he got. And why he initiated the discussion on religion in the first place.
Some quotes:
"They [Arabs] like to teach about Islam, which eventually leads to the question: why don't you
consider conversion? A Westerner may feel uncomfortable and wonder how to give a gracious refusal. The simplest, most gracious, and most acceptable answer is to state that you appreciate the information and respect Islam highly as a religion but that you cannot consider conversion because it would offend your family.”
"Westerners are taught that objectivity, the examination of facts in a logical way without the intrusion of emotional bias, is the mature and constructive approach to human affairs. One of the results of this belief is that in Western culture, subjectivity' — a willingness to allow personal
feelings and emotions to influence one's view of events — represents immaturity. Arabs believe differently- They place a high value on the display of emotion, sometimes to the embarrassment or discomfort of foreigners. It is not uncommon to hear Westerners label this behavior as immature, imposing their own values on what they have observed."
"Arabs have a great deal of pride and are easily hurt; thus, they are sensitive to any display of arrogance by Westerners and to implied criticisms."
Well, the online friendship is lost, but now I know at least why. I truly recommend the book.
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