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Here Be Dragons

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A mid-life crisis, a castle gardener, an unfaithful steed, a dastardly hero, a merciless king, and a dragon that needs saving. With heroes this bad who needs villains...

When Orus graduated from the Cromalot School for Heroes he was ready for a life of glory and adventure. But after being seduced by his first damsel in distress, he quickly learns the heroing life doesn't bring in the steady income required to raise a family.

Twenty years later, with his son all grown up and his waistband all grown out, a favour for a friend gives Orus one last shot at the life he always wanted. But any old hero can slay a dragon, this old hero has to save one.

Here Be Dragons is an action packed, comic fantasy full of unexpected heroes, dastardly villains, chases, escapes, questionable employment practises, ill-fitting trousers and an ill-tempered donkey (as if there was any other kind).

352 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 13, 2018

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609 people want to read

About the author

David P. Macpherson

1 book29 followers
David P. Macpherson grew up in the wilds of the Scottish Highlands, but the city called him and he now lives in Edinburgh. His first novel, Here Be Dragons, was published in 2018. He is a four time winner of www.fantasy-faction.com's short story competition and in 2015 he won the Neil Gaiman Modern Fables Short Story Competition (hosted by The Word Factory). His favourite authors are Sir Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams and he feels uncomfortable writing about himself in the third person.

You can follow him on here, on Twitter at @David_Mac13 or in person if you have a good set of binoculars, but be aware, he is a timid beast, easily startled.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 61 reviews
Profile Image for Hiu Gregg.
133 reviews164 followers
June 26, 2018
With the fourth annual Self-Published Fantasy Blog-Off around the corner, and with the list of the 300 participating books recently released, I decided to check them out to see if anything caught my eye.

Now, I can't stress how difficult it is to write a blurb that stands out among 299 other books. It doesn't matter how epic you make it sound, because when everyone is epic… well… no-one is.

Yet when I read the blurb for Here Be Dragons, I found that my imagination was well and truly captured. It radiated personality and humor, and seemed so radically different from everything else on offer. I was already in the middle of another book, but I figured I'd read some of the sample just to see if it was any good…

That was yesterday. Today, I've already finished.

Here Be Dragons is a wonderful little gem of a book. It's clever, it's funny, and it's just so heart-breakingly wholesome.

A dashing young hero named Orus rescues a beautiful damsel in distress from the clutches of an evil sorcerer. Upon talking to said damsel (Mavis), Orus is shocked to discover that this kidnapping lark is a bit of a regular occurrence…

‘Does this happen to you a lot then?’

‘Oh yes, every month or so. Once word gets out that there's a virgin going about—well it's like moths to a flame. We're always in demand. This is my third kidnapping this year. It's all a bit of a nuisance really.’


Of course, if Mavis wasn't a virgin, then she wouldn't have so much trouble. She's quick to suggest this to Orus, and since everyone knows that you can't get pregnant on your first time, our hero does his duty.

Twenty years later, and Orus is an overweight, balding middle-aged bloke with a steady marriage and a kid that has flown the nest. He hasn't had a bad life, but it isn't exactly the sort of life that he'd had in mind for himself. As much as he loves his family, he's never really had the chance to be the hero that he'd always wanted to be.

But when the last dragon in the world is hunted by glory-hungry 'heroes', someone needs to save it.

Here Be Dragons tells the story of how Orus finally gets his chance to be a hero, and details his struggles as he tries to take it. It's straight-up comedic fantasy, and so it's told with a lot of humour, and a fair amount of trope inversion.

Of course, humour being subjective, these jokes might not land for everyone. Speaking from a personal perspective though, I found that the author's sense of humour was right up my alley. There's clever wordplay, some absurd metaphors, and a supremely intelligent talking donkey that no-one ever listens to.

It's almost a cliché to compare comic fantasy books to Pratchett, but that comparison does have some slight merit here. MacPherson doesn't have the same righteous anger behind his words—which are much more jovial in tone—but he writes in a similar (distinctly British) style.

There's nothing un-funnier than talking about a joke, and so rather than going on about it, I'm going to drop in a short (very slightly spoilery) excerpt for you to read or gloss over as you please.

‘And how many monks did you say there were?’

‘Thirty-three, including me,’ said Ambrose. ‘We'll be there to help you.’

Well, that was a start, thought Orus. Everyone knows that mystic monks hiding in mountain fortresses tended to be trained in all manner of mystical martial arts. ‘And are you good at fighting?’ he asked.

‘Fighting? Oh, no. We won't actually be fighting with you. Our Order is bound by a vow of non-violence. That's why we need you.’

‘So, when you say ‘help’…?’

‘We'll pray for you.’


I feel like I've been going through a bit of a purple patch recently, and as a result my recent reviews have been overwhelmingly positive. I'd intended to be more critical (though not necessarily negative) with this review… but honestly I'm just loathe to criticise this book.

Here Be Dragons isn't perfect. There are a few rough patches dotted throughout, a number of clumsily-worded passages, and I can only recall two female characters off the top of my head. But despite these flaws, I found it to be a really good read. For me, the awkwardness was balanced out by the moments of brilliance.

It's a fairly simple book. There is some depth to the characters and the themes, but anyone expecting a complex exploration of human thoughts and behavior might be a little disappointed. And yet what the characters lack in complexity, they make up for in likability and relatability. I really wanted Orus to succeed, and I was rooting for him (and all the friends he makes) throughout the entirety of the novel.

This came at just the right time for me. After a bunch of particularly dark and violent reads, and after a pretty rough week, Here Be Dragons brought me the laughs that I needed. I haven't laughed so much since Nicholas Eames' Kings of the Wyld, and in a way, this felt like a simpler, family-friendly version of that book.

Here Be Dragons is wholesome. It's clever. It's funny. And despite its flaws and its simplicity, it's one of my favourite finds of the year so far.

If you need a book to make you smile, then I highly suggest that you pick it up.
Profile Image for Julia.
225 reviews2 followers
July 25, 2024
This is a lighthearted, fun and imaginative read with a well thought out plot which goes at its own pace. It has a loveable MC and great supporting cast which make the story really enjoyable to soak up.

”Ordinary people can be heroes too.” - Orus

The author has a great sense of humour which comes through in the characters and the story. I especially enjoyed the footnotes where I thought the humour was at its funniest.
The world building is very rich and I found it easy to imagine the setting. But it was the characters, both good and bad, that brought everything together.

Overall this is a book about a quest of self worth, generosity and friendship. It has a generous helping of heroes, baddies, mercenaries, and a dragon all thrown together to form a superbly written fantasy. The book is full of adventure and humour, making it an enjoyable read for both adults and younger readers.
Profile Image for Lukasz.
1,840 reviews466 followers
August 1, 2018
Info: Although this book is in FBC SPFBO batch, it wasn't part of my batch of eight books. I enjoyed the blurb and Amazon preview and decided to read and review it. It's not FBC's official review though.

Actual rating: 3.5/5

>b>Pratchett was a genius. His books instilled the love of fantasy in me. I tend to reread them when the world becomes too dark. And it's darker without Sir Terry, for sure. That's one of the reasons why I'm eager to try new comedic fantasy, especially when it has this kind of Pratchettesque feel that I crave.

Based on the blurb, Here be Dragons may fill a bill. It's a comedic fantasy that follows Orus, an alumnus of the Cromalot School for Heroes. He was dreaming about the life of adventure. His first mission was successful - he saved a damsel in distress from an evil. Also, from the burden of the virginity. After all, it's well-known fact that getting pregnant during lovers' first time is impossible, right?

Well, no. Not really.

Instead of becoming a hero, Orus became a king's gardener. While gardening isn't the most exciting job ever, it guarantees a steady income needed to support the family.

Twenty years pass fast. Orus is overweight. His son has just left the house. Life seems predictable but, overall, satisfying. That's when a retired hero asks him for a favour. Nothing big, just to deliver a thing to another village. From here, things go in an unexpected direction. There's a dragon that needs to be saved to keep the magic in the world. There are bad guys and fake heroes willing to destroy the poor creature. There's also a thinking and farting donkey, peaceful monks and a lot of action.

Great characters are the engine of comedy, and there are some memorable ones here. The true hero of the story, somewhat theatrical and grumpy donkey called Thunder makes pages more colourful. Orus and his down to earth approach to all things heroic. Our protagonists aren't particularly layered, but it's fine; it works well for this story.
Bad guys, though, are a bit too flat. Sure, it makes them hilarious in a way: one is a vainglorious coward whose cowardice is emphasized many times. The other is just cruel and angry. Their motivations are very simple and shallow.

The other issue I have with the book is the overuse of omniscient narration - there's quite a bit of head-hopping and at times the POV's changes are abrupt and rough. It happens that the narrator gets into someone's head just for one or two paragraphs to delve deeper into situational humour. While it can spice the scenes a bit, it also makes the narration feel unfocused. There's plenty of information that has no bearing on the plot or characterisation.

Some of the sentences are too lengthy and awkward. Also, some of the similes, like this one "The dragon kept coming, battering through the hurled obstacles like a Gran Torino in a 1970s car chase" pulled me out from the medieval setting.

Ultimately, Here be Dragons is an entertaining comic fantasy that will appeal to anyone who is fond of straightforward quest stories with a proper sense of humour. Despite some criticism, I liked the book and read it in two or three sittings.


480 reviews414 followers
September 10, 2018
I received this as a request a while ago, but it's since been entered into SPFBO and it got a semi-final nod from Fantasy Book Critic! I was super stoked to read this since HiuGregg really enjoyed it and I knew it was a comedy going in (my favorite subgenre <3) 

This is a very light hearted book with a lot of humor in it right from the beginning. Orus was a traveling adventurer, he recently graduated from Cromalot School where he was educated on how to be a hero. His first rescue mission was a success, he rescued a damsel in distress from the evil sorcerer who captured her and all seemed well. Except... the damsel is a virgin, and it's commonplace for her to get captured and taken away by one villain or the other, and she has to sit and wait to be rescued time and again. She's tired of it, and sees an option to make her less appealing to the villains - if she simply lost her virginity all will be well! Right, guys? And look, here's a studly hero who just rescued her - may as well! 

They end up with a kid, and the timeline jumps 20 years when Orus is now fat, old, and working as a gardener for the king. It's not exactly what he wanted to be doing, but it has a better steady income when compared to traveling adventurer, life is what it is. He doesn't regret his life, he has a bunch of happy memories with his wife and son, and he loves them both dearly. (I really, really love a well established healthy marriage in fantasy, I don't hit them all that often.) But, he does have regrets that he didn't get to have the life he was expecting to have and dreams of a day where he can go be a hero.  

That "One day" arrives when Orus is asked by an old retired adventurer to take a coin from their village over to another village and deliver it to a person who "will know who he is". It's a mysterious adventure, and of course, Orus thinks that this is his big chance to have a memory, a quest, all to himself for once. He tells his wife he'll be back in a week, hoping it was true, knowing it could be much longer if this does turn into a real adventure. 

And it does! When he arrives at the tavern where he's supposed to be meeting this unknown person, he thinks it would be a good idea to hide his real identity and make himself sound like a hero of legend. He spins a lot of tall tales using stories he used to read to his son before bed, the people in the tavern buy it and he's considered a famous and rich adventurer by all who listened. This backfired when a monk asks for Orus's help, it's help involving a dragon problem, but not a typical dragon problem. The monk doesn't want Orus to slay the dragon, rather he wants him to help save the dragon. If the last dragon in the world dies, magic dies with it. So, Orus finds himself off to Worm-Mount to go and save the dragon, and thus the world. 

The writing in this was intentionally whimsical and funny, very light hearted and up beat through most of the book. It's a nice shift from some of the darker things I've read recently, and I enjoy going back and forth between darker and lighter reads. It's very easy to like the main character and hope for the best for him which is a plus for me. Not all of the jokes landed for me, but I did find myself smiling through the book with a strong sense of the warm and fuzzies. It didn't lack heart or depth of plot either, which are two essential things needed to make a comedy work well. There were, however, some awkward passages, some run on sentences, and things I had to re-read a few times to understand due to how it was phrased. 

Up to the first 20% you're being introduced to the world, it's characters, and getting the basics of the plot down before the real story begins. So, it starts off kind of slower and picks up around a quarter of the way through. This is a bit longer than many of the comedies I read, coming in at 400+ pages this book took the time to explore character development and have a well-conceived plot. 

The world building was whimsical and fun, very old school fantasy with wizards, trolls, dwarves, elves etc. People who like traditional fantasy tropes and satire of those fantasy tropes could really get a kick out of this one. The magic is mysterious, definitely not a hard magic system kind of book with things like Pairing Paper allowing messages to be transmitted over distances, and small suns/rain clouds circling around wizard's hats. 

Overall I liked this one, I will definitely read another by David MacPherson as I'm always looking for a book that makes me smile. 

Audience: 

Comic fantasy 
older MC's 
traditional fantasy races 
dragons 
going on a quest 
mysterious magic 


Ratings: 

Plot: 12/15
Characters: 12.5/15
World Building: 12/15
Writing: 10/15
Pacing: 11/15
Originality: 12.5/15
Personal Enjoyment: 8/10

Final Score: 78/100 - 4 stars recommended! 
Profile Image for Shalini Gunnasan.
255 reviews33 followers
August 9, 2018
I had so much fun reading Here Be Dragons. It is a bright, cheerful, hopeful story with personable villains and adorable heroes. While it has Terry Pratchett-like footnotes and fourth wall humor, it really does have a style of its own. This isn't a story with a twist ending, and it doesn't have to be. This is shamelessly a comfort read, and it is happily determined to make you smile.
Profile Image for Nicola Picken.
10 reviews6 followers
April 22, 2018
Really, really enjoyed this book and read in one sitting. Great characters (I especially loved Thunder's dialogue!), well paced story which moved along smoothly, a perfect Sunday afternoon read! A new author to keep an eye out for.
Profile Image for Rachel Carter.
Author 1 book6 followers
May 17, 2018
Terry Pratchett fans get your fix here

This is an awesome book. It’s very funny (laugh out loud in parts), up there with all the best comic fantasy I’ve read. But it also has moving moments too, particularly Orus’s relationship with his wife and son back home. All the characters are well-drawn and I felt like I could picture them so well in my mind they became real friends and enemies to me. It’s impossible not to root for Ambrose and Orus - the unlikely but loveable heroes, and not to loathe and laugh at the villains and their antics. It makes us question the nature of a true hero and left me feeling uplifted – perhaps there’s hero inside of all of us and at the times we least expect it.

The novel is filled with action, humour, fantastic settings and colourful contraptions. The imagination MacPherson shows is the thing that I found most impressive, I’d love to know where he comes up with all these ideas. His descriptions are worthy of some of the best writers out there. In fact, the quality of the writing means that it will appeal to everyone and not just comic fantasy lovers. I can’t wait to see what else this talented author comes up with.
Profile Image for Rusty.
184 reviews12 followers
May 28, 2025
Last month, I was able to read Benedict Patrick’s Where the Waters Turn Black to my 13-year-old son, Josh. We both really enjoyed that book and wanted to read another book together, this time we chose Here Be Dragons (HBD) by David P. Macpherson. This book has already moved on as a semi-finalist in this year’s SPFBO contest, so I was really exited to read it. When I gave the author my idea of reading this to my son, he was graciously willing to send it, looking forward to our feedback.

The story centers around Orus, a lowly gardener who had dreamed of being a hero since his younger days, but has instead settled for a mundane life in the town of Ditch. Early on, there is a sense that Orus is as pathetic as they come when we see him clearing some plant life from the sewer drains in the castle wall, and then having to “heroically” get out of the unpleasant flow that he unclogged. He lives on a street that is known for its deep (think several feet deep) ruts. He lives next to a retired genuine hero who offers Orus a chance to go on a guest in his place, an offer that Orus can’t refuse.

We don’t want to tell too much more of the story from here because we don’t want to rob you of the wonderful experience that we had in reading this book. Truly, we can’t imagine how this could have been any better. It was witty and full of puns (which scores BIG TIME bonus points for us), had emotional scenes that nearly ripped our hearts out (metal-forkily, of course), and a brilliant cast of characters.

Speaking of characters, we first want to mention Ambrose. Ambrose, a dragon monk in-training, becomes the sidekick to Orus on this quest. He is a starry-eyed youth who is thrilled to be paired up with a “real” hero (if the false stories Orus has told are true). Josh and I initially struggled in this book with a character named Ambrose, because we had recently read Patrick Rothfuss’ Kingkiller Chronicles which includes the infamous Ambrose Jakis – Kvothe’s nemesis. Rothfuss’ Ambrose (who is the inspiration for Kvothe’s song “Jackass Jackass”) is so incredibly UNLIKEABLE that you eventually love/hate him. In contrast, the Ambrose in this book is very charming, relatable, and incredibly LIKEABLE. So now we have the two extremes on the Ambrose spectrum.

While we are on the topic of asses, Orus is aided on the quest by Thunder, his hero neighbor’s donkey. The book is filled with Thunder’s snarky commentary which goes completely unappreciated by all his companions.

Again, with the asses, we have Conrad Von Strauss who is repeatedly referred to as a “pompous ass”. Von Strauss does whatever he must to portray himself as the perfect hero without having to do any of the work or facing any of the threats, but certainly taking ALL the credit.

Perhaps our appreciation for the book can best come unfiltered from Josh himself: “This book is one of the few books I have read that I love on so many levels. It has comedy, great character development, and a very well-written plot. The book is one of the select few with perfect settings (currently including Ender’s Game and the Kingkiller Chronicles). HBD has the ability to have enough information to immerse you in the story’s setting, but not overwhelming you with obsessive amounts of detail. The pacing was fantastic, and Macpherson obviously knew when (and how) to handle action within his book. With such a variety of characters, from Orus to Ambrose, Thunder, Huggle, Von Strauss, King Tyran, Skar, and Ragrund (to name a few), I am impressed at how believable, lovable, ass-like, and relatable they are.

“If I had to compare this book’s style, I would probably compare it to the video game Cuphead, possibly my favorite game of all time. Like Cuphead, HBD has plenty of wit, comedy, great pacing, great characters, wonderful style, a well-written (and unique) plot, and wonderful music. (Please note: HBD does not have a soundtrack, but that is how I describe the rhythm and flow of this book.) I would seldomly want to put the book down, as I am sure my dad would attest, and I loved the book thoroughly.”

High praises indeed!

This was an enjoyable read, and I would HIGHLY recommend it. Thank you, David, for sending this to us through TBRindr. Well done! 4.6 / 5 stars. (Josh would have given it a 4.7+)
10 reviews
July 26, 2018
I really enjoyed the story from beginning to end.
Well written and enjoyable, recognisable characters.
If you are in to dark humor and sarcasm you wil even have more fun.
Good for ages 10 to 110 , altough as a parent you wil probably have some strange questions coming from your kid so read it first lol.
Realy a long time since i enjoyed a S&S book as much as this one since Terry Pratchett's "Guards,Guards and Carpe jugulum.
I'm a fan :)
11 reviews1 follower
October 30, 2018
Very different take

This was a different take on hero genre. Dragon is just a plot device, it is just a race against time to save the magic that will be lost from the world if certain events transpires.
Profile Image for Bob McGough.
Author 12 books51 followers
January 28, 2019
This book is great! Heartwarming and hilarious, I literally laughed out loud multiple times. It has a similar vibe to Kings of the Wyld, being funny, and about an old adventurer knocking the dust off and getting back at it. If you loved that you should love this and vice versa.
Profile Image for Patrick LeClerc.
Author 11 books82 followers
November 14, 2018
“Here Be Dragons” is a fun read. If you like Pratchett or Adams, you’ll probably like this.

It begins with our hero Orus, newly out of Hero Academy, who has just rescued a damsel in distress from the clutches of an evil sorcerer. It’s not long before Orus is married with a young son, and finds that heroing isn’t a steady gig to support a family on, so he becomes a gardener to the king. The marriage is a happy one, but he looks back wistfully at his days as a hero.

Twenty years later, twenty years older and balder and fatter, Orus gets a chance for another adventure. Not to slay a dragon, but to save the last dragon in the world.

This is a comedy, but it’s a charming one. MacPherson deftly avoids the pitfalls I feared. Orus isn’t just a buffoon, he’s maybe not the dashing blade he was in his youth, but he has the wisdom of years to go with his aching joints. The supporting characters are fun, there are a few nice memorable villains and enjoyable encounters along the way.

As a man who used to be a hell of a swordsman myself a number of years and a few pounds ago, I found this to be a thoroughly enjoyable read. The voice is terrific, the characters relatable, the story is fun. The writing has a few instances where it gets a bit clunky, but the narrative carries it through.

If you want a fun, witty, comic fantasy with a heart of gold, pick up this book. Even if you aren’t an old, fat ex-hero, you’ll enjoy it.
Profile Image for Steve Thomas.
Author 16 books43 followers
July 5, 2018
*This is part of a continuing series to highlight comic fantasy by reviewing books and trying to characterize the style of humor. If you know of comic fantasy books you’d like to see me cover, leave a comment. I’m currently prioritizing comic fantasy entrants from SPFBO2018.*

One of the staples of the fantasy genre is the unlikely hero. In comic fantasy, this hyperbolically becomes the implausible hero. “Here Be Dragons” by David Macpherson stars Orus, an old, fat, retired adventurer who changed careers to King’s gardener after impregnating a the first princess he ever rescued.

‘Oh yes,’ replied Mavis, moving in for the kiss. ‘It can’t happen the first time. Everyone knows that.’ Unbeknown to him at that magical moment, Orus was about to learn one of life’s most valuable lessons: virgins should not take safe sex advice from other virgins. Nine months later he would also learn that being a wandering adventurer didn’t bring in the steady income required for supporting a new family."

He’s a hoarder with a man-chest full of regrets, and takes up a quest to save the last dragon because hey, why not?

"Dreams weren’t for people like him. They were for princes and kings, knights and wizards. Dreams were there to push along children until they reached the point in their lives where it was too far to turn back, where joy in what you had was replaced by frustrated desire for what you didn’t. For people like him, dreams were there to break you."

He’s being pursued by an alliance of vain, cruel, self-aggrandizing nominal heroes who want the honor of killing the last dragon. As you can imagine, this book takes joy in trope subversions. That’s where a lot of the humor comes from, combined with the hectic, slapstick action that comes from implausible heroes barely scraping by. We also have some delightful descriptions and analogies.

"The other visitor to Orus’s room still stood in the doorway, a bit like a man watching a husband and wife argue and trying to pick the best moment to explain his jacket was on the back of one of their chairs."

However, I’m sorry to say that this book left me feeling kind of lukewarm. It mostly succeeds as a comedy, but what it did right just wasn’t quite enough for me. My biggest complaint was actually the writing itself. There was a lot of flat prose, whereas comedy writing benefits from a bit of jauntiness. The prose was often awkward and labored, and stingy with the commas. Around once per chapter, the point of view changed without warning, which got disorienting. These things hurt the comic timing and delivery. It’s a death sentence for a joke when the reader needs to take a moment to parse out the face-value meaning of a paragraph.

This was an inconsistent book for me. When it worked, it worked well. I particularly enjoyed the occasional chapter telling a side-story from a one-off POV. While I can’t give this one an enthusiastic endorsement, it’s worth downloading the sample and checking it out for yourself. The first few chapters are pretty indicative of what the rest of the book will be like.
Profile Image for Amanda.
914 reviews
September 24, 2025
This is a very funny book about a retired hero who is called upon to save the last dragon. I loved the characters and the twists on the traditional hero story.
Profile Image for Autumn.
443 reviews1 follower
November 20, 2018
Pretty funny. Along the lines of Disc World, Monty Python and “The Domesday Book (no not that one).” Entertaining story, fantasy, not your usual hero.
Profile Image for J. Pike.
Author 11 books950 followers
March 16, 2019
I picked up Here Be Dragons for a few reasons: it’s an SPFBO04 contestant; author David P. Macpherson is one of the few contestants who submitted a humorous fantasy novel, and the judges said a lot of great things when they made it a semi-finalist. Plus, it’s got dragons!

Well, not really. Because, as the book explains early on, “heroes” have hunted the world’s dragons to near extinction, and the scaly critters’ last individual is guarded by a sect of monks. That last dragon is, in fact, inside an egg, but that’s not stopping a Farquaad-ish hero and his expansive retinue of thugs from trying to slay it. Saving the egg, and the world, falls by chance and scheme to Orus, a portly ex-hero who has married a damsel, raised a son, and found employment as a gardener-slash-handyman in a small castle. Hijinks ensue.

The plot of Here Be Dragons is a fun twist on the (ex)-hero’s journey across a servicable magical setting. Orus a fantastically mundane protagonist, the likable underdog you can’t help but root for. The villains and side characters are more cartoonish, but as a former animator, believe that I mean that in the best possible way. The characters and world they inhabit are often cleverly exaggerated in a way that put me in mind of Shrek or Disenchanted.

I did have a couple of quibbles. The plot meandered in a couple of places, and the author had a lot of jokes and commentary around a particular donkey that almost universally fell flat for me. But they’re exactly that: quibbles that did little to diminish my enjoyment of the book.

Overall, it was MacPherson’s writing and wit that kept bringing me back for more. Funny one-liners and clever observations fill most chapters to the brim, and I often caught myself grinning as I read. If you need a good chuckle and an uplifting tale, Macpherson’s debut novel is a great place to start.

My Score:
Plot: 6/10
Characters: 8/10
Setting: 5/10
Writing: 9/10
Personal Enjoyment: 8/10

Final Verdict: Here Be Dragons is an endearing comedy with a sharp with and a lot of heart. If you like fantasy humor, I highly recommend it. 4/5 Stars
Profile Image for Laura May.
Author 7 books53 followers
October 14, 2018
An enjoyable comedic fantasy, and dare I say 'romp', through a land of un-heroes bound in a quest to save or destroy the last dragon--and, thereby, the world.
It has a good story arc and editing errors are minimal; the pace is fair and the wit constant.

However.

Every character is a dude. We have fat dudes, old dudes, scrawny dudes, naive dudes, callous dudes, violent dudes, arrogant dudes, and self-reflective dudes. There are, on the other hand, a total of two female characters mentioned in the whole book. One has several lines, though it must be noted, even THIS character has a beard; the other is a virgin plot device with NO characterisation, who after the introductory pages, says just two lines in the remainder of the book. You'd think the only people who mattered in this world were guys, that the only people capable of character, adventure, or development are male--not good enough. For an author whose characters are otherwise nuanced (at least in the case of our heroes) and sympathetic, this is an appalling oversight. Women are people too, and it would be great to see MacPherson bother writing as if that were the case.

3.5*
20 reviews1 follower
January 17, 2019
This book was a surprise and a delight. I got it as part of my Kindle Unlimited subscription and it's one of those absolute gems that make the subscription worth it.

The entire premise is a great twist on the genre. The jokes are actually funny (as someone who braves it through a lot of "the next Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy!" books, this is seriously high praise) and it's all in all just downright heartwarming. Each character is interesting and distinct. Maybe it's just because I've been playing a lot of D&D lately, but it's an absolute breath of fresh air in a genre that tends towards cliches. I'm so so glad this was my first read of the year. Can't wait to see what this author comes up with next!
Profile Image for Michael.
165 reviews
September 30, 2019
Truly like an early Pratchett novel

I’m a huge fan of Terry Pratchett. I can think of no finer a compliment than to say that someone’s writing reminds me of him. This book filled the ache I’ve felt since Sir Terrys loss. I’ll be following this author with great relish in the future. Keep ‘em coming!
Profile Image for Calvin Park.
183 reviews46 followers
April 7, 2019
I am not a huge fan of comic fantasy. I tend to find it a little over the top, have trouble connecting with the characters, and otherwise just find that it isn’t for me. Nevertheless, every so often I’ll come across a funny fantasy novel that I enjoy quite a bit. Finding Here be Dragons by David P. Macpherson was one of those times. Macpherson gives us a fun novel that doesn’t take itself seriously, and reminds me in some ways of all the best parts of the comedy in Stargate SG-1 but in a fantasy setting.

In Here be Dragons we follow Orus, someone trained at the premier school for heroes but who never amounted to much as a hero. This is because on his first rescue of a damsel in distress he ended up fathering a child and actually stayed to raise that child. He’s now a gardener, but when he’s summoned for an important quest he figures now might be his chance to truly be a hero, especially since his son’s now away at mage college. From this quick summary you can already see the tongue in cheek nature of the narrative. It’s a lot of fun watching Orus half bungle his way through the early portions of his journey. We meet a wonderful cast of characters, including the Grandmaster of an order of monks who I swear reminds me to no end of Fizban the Fabulous from Dragonlance. While there is a lot of comedy, some of which is over the top, Macpherson does a good job of grounding the story in character emotions that are pretty relatable. Which one of us hasn’t worried that maybe we’ve missed the boat somewhere? Haven’t we all felt like failures from time to time? While the story is funny and excellently paced, what I think made it stand out for me was the emotion of the characters. Macpherson’s skill with this is what makes the novel work.

The biggest issue for me with this book was that it felt perhaps a little overlong. The book was incredibly well paced until the final 15% or so. At that point I felt like perhaps Macpherson was stretching things out just a little bit with a few final challenges that didn’t hold much tension. While this may seem like a minor criticism, I felt like it robbed the ending a bit. Better to feel like we move smoothly into it, rather than that we get to it only after a couple extra things that just didn’t quite feel like they flowed as well. There were also a couple of moments when some of the comedy felt a little too cute or over the top, but I often have that feeling with comic fantasy and with Here be Dragons I had it far less than I normally do.

Macpherson’s novel is a fun, sometimes zany, fantasy adventure. While comical throughout, it's actually quite powerful as well. It's a book about accepting who you are, and not letting the dream of what you wished life were like overshadow the good in your life. It excels at showing that message through the characters actions, as opposed to their dialog, thus it never comes off as preachy. Take a chance on this one and gift it a read.

8.0/10

4/5 stars.

5 – I loved this, couldn’t put it down, move it to the top of your TBR pile
4 – I really enjoyed this, add it to the TBR pile
3 – It was ok, depending on your preferences it may be worth your time
2 – I didn’t like this book, it has significant flaws and I can’t recommend it
1 – I loathe this book with a most loathsome loathing
Profile Image for Jenny T.
1,015 reviews45 followers
June 20, 2022
5/5 stars -- Such a fun read!

This book was the perfect remedy for a stressful week: light and funny and full of heart. Orus is a gardener, a father, a one-time hero who is now happily married with a grown son. When a friend asks him for help, he goes on one last quest to slay-- er, to SAVE a dragon, with a sarcastic donkey as his noble steed, and a very sweet dragon monk as his companion.

The competition is fierce: a professional Hero with his own Bard and war-band is out to slay said dragon. Will Orus get there first, and in one piece? Will the dragon end up eating him in thanks for his efforts? Will he ever get home to his family?

The story is fast-paced, fun. and VERY quotable:

"A lone warrior on a horse, long flowing hair, sword by his side, muscles so well defined they had their own page in the dictionary: he had found him."

Or, for example, a struggle between a dragon monk and a tea kettle:

"The Brewmaster 5-40 gurgled one last call of defiance. The Grandmaster raised the mallet again and gave it a hard look. This seemed to convince the tangle of brass plumbing to submit for the time being. It hadn’t given up though; revenge – it knew – unlike tea, was best served cold."

🤣

Absolutely adorable. I loved this book to pieces.
Profile Image for Miss Lisa-Marie Worsford.
3 reviews
March 26, 2019
Greatly enjoyed.

You can see the obvious Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams influences, but the book was highly enjoyable nonetheless. I would certainly read a sequel.
485 reviews3 followers
September 19, 2018
Many of the comedic books I've read, while fun, have been lacking depth. This certainly is not the case with this one. The comedy and pacing were well done and enjoyable, but the best part is the book actually had a point that leaves you smiling at the end happy to have read it.
364 reviews7 followers
January 8, 2019
Lots of fake Dragon torture and a really good story!

If course Thunder the donkey was one of the heroes of this story. I really liked the description of the Guardian of the Dragon and the nesting site. The bad guys got what they deserved and the good guys got to be alive. What more could you want in a story?.
Profile Image for Matt_E.
91 reviews1 follower
January 27, 2025
Really enjoyable book with plenty of parts that made me chuckle. Plenty of moments really felt for the characters. Perfect. Really hope for more from this author
Profile Image for Bender.
455 reviews46 followers
July 14, 2019
As good as any of Terry Pratchett and that's not something I'd say easily.

A extremely intelligent and funny roller coaster of a novel, that'll hook you from page 1 and won't let you leave till the finish. Action, adventure ever mixed with humor fills the pages, making a fantastic read.

It turns all usual fantasy tropes on its head and you find yourself just letting go and enjoying the ride.

Definitely recommended.
Profile Image for Addi.
273 reviews2 followers
August 5, 2019
A fun and comical take on the fantast genre and it works for the most part. I am however at a place perhaps where the sustained ironic narrator becomes a bit tedious and had to finish the ook in bits and pieces not always connecting with the authorial tone. So a three star doesnt mean the boo was just ok...it is a good book for people who like the sustained comedic tone which i dont quite.
Profile Image for Chandirasekar Zasz.
37 reviews6 followers
July 12, 2019
Worthy heir to Pratchett

A extremely intelligent and funny roller coaster of a novel, that'll hook you from page 1 and won't let you leave till the finish. Action, adventure ever mixed with humor fills the pages, making a fantastic read.

Definitely recommended.
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