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Just When You’re Comfortable in Your Own Skin, It Starts to Sag: Rewriting the Rules to Midlife
Delivered in the voice of a close friend, this clever and witty guide from this bestselling duo takes women through the new and sometimes challenging phase of middle age. Whether married, single, widowed, divorced, with children or without, at some point women inevitably ask the question, "What's next?" Here, they will find a road map for how to embrace and thrive in this new phase of life, with chapters covering redefining what beauty means after age 40, caring for aging parents, navigating midlife relationships and dating, and discovering new career paths. With helpful quizzes, friendly advice, and inspiring quotes from women who have been there, this smart and engaging book gives readers the tools to turn a midlife crisis into a midlife opportunity.
208 pages, Paperback
First published April 10, 2018
40 people are currently reading
867 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
August 22, 2018
Witty and hilarious, this is the guidebook to our "middle years" that I'm sure our predecessors wish they had. I would give this as a gift to my friends, for sure. I received this book in a LibraryThing Early Reviewer giveaway and I'm grateful I did!
June 6, 2018
I love being in my forties. My life and my body aren't perfect, but my forties have taught me that IT'S OKAY. I'm comfortable with who I am, what I am, and where I'm going. I'm comfortable in my own skin. That's why the book, Just When You're Comfortable in Your Own Skin, It Starts to Sag was one I knew I had to read.
SYNOPSIS
I was fortunate to receive a free copy from the publisher, Chronicle Books. The authors, Amy Nobile and Trisha Ashworth, have written two previous books about other stages in life, I Was A Really Good Mother Before I Had Children and I'd Trade My Husband for a Housekeeper. This quick read was filled with the voices of lots of women just like me who are in the middle of their life and are reinventing what it all means. I loved how honest the authors were. They didn't sugar coat anything. They didn't make you feel like you're doing it all wrong, or that there is only one best way to succeed through this next phase of life. Reading this book, I felt empowered and validated. Some of the topics include:
the balance between aging kids and aging parents
redefining body image
the truths about menopause
relationship resets
finding yourself
finding your (new) passion
I didn't relate to every single chapter, well, not yet anyway. But if I'm not going through it, chances are someone in my tribe is. Reading and understanding what we all go through, the challenges we face at this stage of life is helpful. It doesn't have to be something that we dread. It doesn't have to be something that we try to avoid or pretend is there. Reading glasses and bad feet and saggy boobs aren't the end of the world. They're just something new to adjust to. There is strength and power in the knowledge that you are not alone as we face the challenges in this stage of life and this book does a great job of providing just that.
REVIEW
If you aren't at least somewhere in your forties or beyond, chances are you aren't ready for this book yet. But if you are sitting in the middle of mid-life, let's say between 40-60 years young, I think you'll have lots to take away from this book. Personally, I enjoyed this book. It wasn't heavy or wordy or filled with long, drawn-out explanations. This book is an encouragement, a "you're not alone" self-help book. The edges of most pages are filled with quotes from women across the country expressing their truths about mid-life. This book encourages you to find your happiest self, to look forward to all your life still has to offer.
SYNOPSIS
I was fortunate to receive a free copy from the publisher, Chronicle Books. The authors, Amy Nobile and Trisha Ashworth, have written two previous books about other stages in life, I Was A Really Good Mother Before I Had Children and I'd Trade My Husband for a Housekeeper. This quick read was filled with the voices of lots of women just like me who are in the middle of their life and are reinventing what it all means. I loved how honest the authors were. They didn't sugar coat anything. They didn't make you feel like you're doing it all wrong, or that there is only one best way to succeed through this next phase of life. Reading this book, I felt empowered and validated. Some of the topics include:
the balance between aging kids and aging parents
redefining body image
the truths about menopause
relationship resets
finding yourself
finding your (new) passion
I didn't relate to every single chapter, well, not yet anyway. But if I'm not going through it, chances are someone in my tribe is. Reading and understanding what we all go through, the challenges we face at this stage of life is helpful. It doesn't have to be something that we dread. It doesn't have to be something that we try to avoid or pretend is there. Reading glasses and bad feet and saggy boobs aren't the end of the world. They're just something new to adjust to. There is strength and power in the knowledge that you are not alone as we face the challenges in this stage of life and this book does a great job of providing just that.
REVIEW
If you aren't at least somewhere in your forties or beyond, chances are you aren't ready for this book yet. But if you are sitting in the middle of mid-life, let's say between 40-60 years young, I think you'll have lots to take away from this book. Personally, I enjoyed this book. It wasn't heavy or wordy or filled with long, drawn-out explanations. This book is an encouragement, a "you're not alone" self-help book. The edges of most pages are filled with quotes from women across the country expressing their truths about mid-life. This book encourages you to find your happiest self, to look forward to all your life still has to offer.
May 23, 2018
won from www.librarything.com
February 18, 2020
This felt like a train wreck. It was a smattering of thoughts and quotes, and very little of it felt insightful. I think this was supposed to be a compilation of interviews they’d done with women... but it was presented fairly loosely, with almost no collective data, and with lots of the authors’ own narrative thrown in. It just felt like a a train wreck/dump of ideas, and the majority of them were whiny. The book also basically assumes that the reader is married with children, so the bulk of the content excluded me. The layout/formatting was also terrible and distracting — multiple different colored fonts, quotes running down the side of already-narrow pages; uninteresting checklist/quizzes at the start of each chapter.
June 26, 2019
I won this book on a Goodreads Giveaway. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
I'm a young reader currently, but super open to reading all kinds of material, including the kind that may give me tips into what to expect as I'm getting older. This book seemed no different than what I was looking forward to, so I was hoping to get a few good ideas from it.
Of course there is a but coming...
Opening up the first few pages to the table of contents and you probably opened this book for the following reasons section, there are allusions to kids everywhere.
"Asking your son to redesign your Insta page..."
"Begging your tween daughter to admit that you are prettier than you think..."
God, how miserable can you get to come to this point? Holy shit, shoot me in the head if I have to ask my own kid if I even seem attractive.
But that's the whole other side of the coin, the fact that kids are mentioned right out the gate. WHAT IF I DON'T WANT/HAVE KIDS?! I don't think the writers ever considered that, which is fucking rude. I'm a human being and woman before I'm a mom. No wonder Amy Nobile is writing this book. Her kids have ruined her body, and this book is a fucking memoir learning how to deal with that fact.
Or maybe that's the crux of the whole message. If you have kids and you're middle-aged, your body is going to be shit. If you are middle-aged and don't have kids, it's going to be significantly better based on the fact that you had more time to take care of yourself rather than kids ruining it for you.
So yeah, I'm giving this book 1 star. Don't assume I have kids. DON'T. Then I'll assume that you really wrote this book for yourself because of how bad your body looks post-20+ years of raising children.
Amy and Trisha, send me a revised version that doesn't bring kids into the equation and maybe I'll consider opening it up to see if there are any benefits to reading crap like this when this is only written to cheer up poor moms who are sad with what they have in life.
I'm a young reader currently, but super open to reading all kinds of material, including the kind that may give me tips into what to expect as I'm getting older. This book seemed no different than what I was looking forward to, so I was hoping to get a few good ideas from it.
Of course there is a but coming...
Opening up the first few pages to the table of contents and you probably opened this book for the following reasons section, there are allusions to kids everywhere.
"Asking your son to redesign your Insta page..."
"Begging your tween daughter to admit that you are prettier than you think..."
God, how miserable can you get to come to this point? Holy shit, shoot me in the head if I have to ask my own kid if I even seem attractive.
But that's the whole other side of the coin, the fact that kids are mentioned right out the gate. WHAT IF I DON'T WANT/HAVE KIDS?! I don't think the writers ever considered that, which is fucking rude. I'm a human being and woman before I'm a mom. No wonder Amy Nobile is writing this book. Her kids have ruined her body, and this book is a fucking memoir learning how to deal with that fact.
Or maybe that's the crux of the whole message. If you have kids and you're middle-aged, your body is going to be shit. If you are middle-aged and don't have kids, it's going to be significantly better based on the fact that you had more time to take care of yourself rather than kids ruining it for you.
So yeah, I'm giving this book 1 star. Don't assume I have kids. DON'T. Then I'll assume that you really wrote this book for yourself because of how bad your body looks post-20+ years of raising children.
Amy and Trisha, send me a revised version that doesn't bring kids into the equation and maybe I'll consider opening it up to see if there are any benefits to reading crap like this when this is only written to cheer up poor moms who are sad with what they have in life.
March 29, 2020
“Just When You’re Comfortable in Your Own Skin, It Starts To Sag” is a great conversation starter for questions that arise in Midlife. We all need to have this conversation!!! Midlife, for many, means loss; your own body changes, changes in or loss of your career, your kids leaving the house, you or your spouse leaving the house, aging parents, relatives and friends some of whom have died, even pets that have grown up with your kids are getting old, sick, and dying, (etc.). Many of these things happening simultaneously. It can be very overwhelming even for those of us who had strong matter of fact women in our lives who had the conversation about midlife as they moved forward with grace. Nobile and Ashworth have constructed a path to help us begin to navigate this tumultuous time of life. Whether you agree with their thoughts about, past generations vs. present, or ideas of how to move forward, for example, the purpose is to empower you to move forward, and begin the next stage of your life without fear or apology, but with wisdom and self fulfillment.
February 8, 2025
I really enjoyed this book. I'm only 33 but a lot of what was discussed I am currently working through or I already have gone through as my life has had a lot of shifts in very little time.
It was also very eye opening and humbling to get an insight into what's to come in my next 10 - 20 years on this planet. I would recommend this to anyone in their 30s if they don't have women in their lives to talk to about mid-life changes
It was very relatable, having multiple quotes and snippets of women's experiences throughout the book was very helpful to see all perspectives. I would have loved to see more tips and tools on how to navigate specific situations but I also understand that's not what this book is geared towards.
What I do see is a fantastic book that opens up the conversation for women around taboo topics or just topics we feel embarrassed to touch up on in our everyday lives. It is very empowering to know we are not alone in our experiences and we are not crazy for having the thoughts or feelings we do have around mid-life shifts and changes.
It was also very eye opening and humbling to get an insight into what's to come in my next 10 - 20 years on this planet. I would recommend this to anyone in their 30s if they don't have women in their lives to talk to about mid-life changes
It was very relatable, having multiple quotes and snippets of women's experiences throughout the book was very helpful to see all perspectives. I would have loved to see more tips and tools on how to navigate specific situations but I also understand that's not what this book is geared towards.
What I do see is a fantastic book that opens up the conversation for women around taboo topics or just topics we feel embarrassed to touch up on in our everyday lives. It is very empowering to know we are not alone in our experiences and we are not crazy for having the thoughts or feelings we do have around mid-life shifts and changes.
September 28, 2021
I chose to read this book because I'm experiencing that 'midlife void' the authors talk about - but unfortunately there was nothing here that helped alleviate that feeling, other than not being alone.
It's written mostly for women who have teenage kids and ill parents, which made me feel excluded and a bit sad, since I don't fit that profile (so basically I can't pass my stretchmarks off as 'the gateway to my beautiful children' as the book advised me to.)
Other than that, there are all the usual cliches about being yourself and not caring what other people think, and a few contradictory messages about feeling more beautiful than ever before one moment, and then wishing you were 21 again the next.
It's written mostly for women who have teenage kids and ill parents, which made me feel excluded and a bit sad, since I don't fit that profile (so basically I can't pass my stretchmarks off as 'the gateway to my beautiful children' as the book advised me to.)
Other than that, there are all the usual cliches about being yourself and not caring what other people think, and a few contradictory messages about feeling more beautiful than ever before one moment, and then wishing you were 21 again the next.
April 30, 2018
I don't identify with the traditional profile of a "middle-aged-woman," but can't deny that I'm facing midlife challenges I'm not entirely sure how to navigate. This book provides affirmation, inspiration, and motivation that although I don't always necessarily know where I'm going or how to get there, there's a community of like-minded women who feel the same way. I'm recommending this book to all my friends (and my book club!) because this is a conversation all women "of a certain age" should be having.
June 23, 2018
I received a free copy of this book from Chronicle Books.
The writing style for this book is breezy and humorous.
This book seems to be addressed to a specific reading audience, which I would define as upper-middle-class, middle-aged working women -- usually traditionally married with children.
I appreciated the emphasis on maintenance of physical fitness as critical to growing older successfully. In particular, the attention given to brain health is valuable.
An index would have been very helpful, but was not included.
The writing style for this book is breezy and humorous.
This book seems to be addressed to a specific reading audience, which I would define as upper-middle-class, middle-aged working women -- usually traditionally married with children.
I appreciated the emphasis on maintenance of physical fitness as critical to growing older successfully. In particular, the attention given to brain health is valuable.
An index would have been very helpful, but was not included.
June 22, 2022
Probably more 3.5 stars but something I enjoyed and felt like I could identify with 90+% - not sure it’s life changing, but reassuring that so many of my thoughts in the last few years are not alone - even if it’s with strangers. Certainly something I could pick up at any time and open to any page and find something relatable, especially now that I have read it cover to cover in chronological order because that is just who I am. LOL
January 27, 2020
Picked up randomly from library display shelf and it just caught my interest. Probably 5-10 years younger than the intended readers group and not particularly at the midlife, I still like this book as an easy read and lots of insightful advices to ponder upon. It’s never too early to be prepared, and it’s never too late to start doing something new or find your passion. It was an enjoyable read
February 10, 2020
As someone on the other side of mid-life, I enjoyed this book of insights and inspiration on navigating the other side! A road map for women to embrace and reinvent themselves to become their true essence. -- Karen Briscoe, author and podcast host 5 Minute Success
April 30, 2020
I would call this book ‘Meh’ validating how midlife feels with not much practical advice. Didn’t go in depth on many things and. A lot of random quotes from other middle age women. One who called herself middle aged at 39!
September 26, 2020
I think I found this book a little too late. I have already contemplated and figured out those things this book aims to assist you with. I do think it would be a great companion, light read for those at the crossroads wondering, what’ next? Just not for me.
May 10, 2018
A wonderful, authentic book - for all women 40+.
Loved it!!!!
Loved it!!!!
June 22, 2018
This one made me laugh quite a bit but also realize how much we have in common.
July 10, 2018
Does help one understand why she is going some specific issues during mid-life and helps process those issues.
September 16, 2018
Lots of talk and I agreed and identified with most of it, however based on the title I thought it would be funnier. Also lacking in concrete steps for insights and action
March 9, 2020
Clever delivery on some hard to deal with issues . Loved this from start to finish. Recommended it to all my girlfriends !!
October 16, 2020
Some nuggets of wisdom to be gained from this book, but not enough for me to recommend. Some parts just felt repetitive.
March 29, 2022
I wish this had been written ten years ago. Very uplifting
Read
March 16, 2025DNF. Not where I am and not exactly how I see things. Not enjoyable reading for me
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews