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FIRST WE HAVE COFFEE
Margaret Jensen's warm stories of life as the daughter of a Scandinavian immigrant pastor in the Canadian north touch readers' heart with timeless lessons of unwavering faith and family love.
185 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1982
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779 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 82 reviews
October 7, 2015
The author, born in 1917, shares memories of growing up in the household of her intellectual minister father and her more-than-capable Norwegian immigrant mother. Every chapter is loaded with heart and in each is a life lesson that is timeless. I mean, I felt like I was sitting at the knee of a woman with as much faith and inclusive love as Corrie ten Boom! This amazing woman would have been a contemporary of my grandmothers, for whom I also have huge admiration and gratitude. This is the kind of womanhood we need to replicate today. For this reason I feel that this is a MUST READ for any woman who is at the helm of a household.
I took a peek at some of the other "reviews" of this book and would like to add some thoughts about the emotionally distant father. It seems that today's take on yesterday's parenting is more along the lines of, "Hey, get with the program. Get over yourself already. Be chummy, even if you are clueless as to how to be playful or engaged."
My father was also emotionally distant, intellectual, and a bit apart from family life. I remember wishing at times that he were more fun. However, I came to appreciate him immensely when I became an adult. Looking back I can see that he WAS involved with us in very important ways and that he managed to make being a father a high priority. Things are not always as they appear.
The author shares a watershed moment in her parent's marriage which she learned about when her mother was very old. There was an incident that made her mother contemplate leaving her husband. Just as this was about to happen she heard a sermon on forgiveness from a visiting pastor which helped her reconsider her decision. I think that part of the strength of this memoir is including the challenges faced.
I took a peek at some of the other "reviews" of this book and would like to add some thoughts about the emotionally distant father. It seems that today's take on yesterday's parenting is more along the lines of, "Hey, get with the program. Get over yourself already. Be chummy, even if you are clueless as to how to be playful or engaged."
My father was also emotionally distant, intellectual, and a bit apart from family life. I remember wishing at times that he were more fun. However, I came to appreciate him immensely when I became an adult. Looking back I can see that he WAS involved with us in very important ways and that he managed to make being a father a high priority. Things are not always as they appear.
The author shares a watershed moment in her parent's marriage which she learned about when her mother was very old. There was an incident that made her mother contemplate leaving her husband. Just as this was about to happen she heard a sermon on forgiveness from a visiting pastor which helped her reconsider her decision. I think that part of the strength of this memoir is including the challenges faced.
February 12, 2015
10+ stars.
I had SUCH an emotional response to this book. This book tells mainly about the author's Norwegian mother who was a pastor's wife, serving in so many different ways. This woman is truly an inspiration in the way she raised her family, in the way she reached out to bless all those in her path and community, in her home-keeping and most importantly in her deep faith in the Lord. Sometimes life doesn't bless us with an in-real-life Titus 2 mentor - and if that is true for you, as it is for me, then you will want to read this book so that Mama Twten's courage and unshakeable faith can mentor you through the words of her daughter Margaret. Truly a gem.
I have taken pages of notes already and I'm a little upset that this is a library book, and I can't write the dates of my notes in the margins. I've located a second-hand copy that is on its way to me.
I had SUCH an emotional response to this book. This book tells mainly about the author's Norwegian mother who was a pastor's wife, serving in so many different ways. This woman is truly an inspiration in the way she raised her family, in the way she reached out to bless all those in her path and community, in her home-keeping and most importantly in her deep faith in the Lord. Sometimes life doesn't bless us with an in-real-life Titus 2 mentor - and if that is true for you, as it is for me, then you will want to read this book so that Mama Twten's courage and unshakeable faith can mentor you through the words of her daughter Margaret. Truly a gem.
I have taken pages of notes already and I'm a little upset that this is a library book, and I can't write the dates of my notes in the margins. I've located a second-hand copy that is on its way to me.
March 5, 2017
One of the sweetest and most awesome inspirational autobiography I have ever read!
May 7, 2016
This collection of heart-warming family stories about an incredible Christian Norwegian-American woman held plenty of life lessons about trusting God and loving others. It was told in an informal, rather disjointed style, which makes it like you're reading your own family's memories about a revered relative. I find that to be charming if I know the person, but in books I prefer more of a story arc. However, I'm certainly glad I read it.
February 19, 2024
Mama Tweten was the hands and feet of Jesus, preaching the Gospel through unadorned hospitality and pure love. In obedience to God and love for the ministry, she opened wide her door and welcomed people in. Her hospitality had a way of healing and countless lives were changed.
These stories testify to her quiet strength and unshakeable faith in God. Mama Tweten really, truly lived what she believed, and you will be better for knowing her journey. It’s the kind of heart-warming, convicting book you want to read sitting at the kitchen table with, you guessed it, endless cups of coffee.
These stories testify to her quiet strength and unshakeable faith in God. Mama Tweten really, truly lived what she believed, and you will be better for knowing her journey. It’s the kind of heart-warming, convicting book you want to read sitting at the kitchen table with, you guessed it, endless cups of coffee.
April 11, 2023
Have you ever heard of Elvine Tweten? Well neither I had either, until I read this book, and yet she seems to me a hero of the faith just as much as many others whose names are better known. I was so inspired by Margaret Jensen’s memoirs of her parents, but particularly her mother’s (Elvine’s) steadfast faith, and loving service. That her six children rise up and call her blessed is the best testimony I can imagine, and the legacy that I too hope to leave behind. This was the perfect book to finish on Easter Sunday, and I left feeling that I am a better person for knowing Mrs. Tweten even this much.
February 14, 2022
This was very sweet. The first half or so held together better because it was a sustained narrative. Then things got episodic and choppy. I wish a good editor had been there to push it into becoming a better book. So...not great writing, but encouraging stories of trusting a faithful God. Here are a few quotes I flagged:
"Papa's call was to preach. [Mama's] call was to make her family a home in this wilderness." (p. 17)
"Ben you have heart room, you have house room." (p. 26)
"As Mama ironed, she taught. Her methods were simple: endless songs and stories and Bible verses for us to memorize. I sat enthralled, watching, and waiting for the day I could iron the dish towels, then the starched pillowcases, and then graduate to Papa's white handkerchiefs, which had to be perfectly folded." (p. 38)
"Papa then left to visit the widows and orphans, but not without a word of caution from Mama about the widows." (p. 39)
"Mama never wavered." (p. 50)
(Then I was hurrying to finish the book and didn't stop to flag anything else.)
It drives me nuts that in the repeated pattern on the cover background, one coffee cup is missing. How has no one ever missed that and fixed it?
"Papa's call was to preach. [Mama's] call was to make her family a home in this wilderness." (p. 17)
"Ben you have heart room, you have house room." (p. 26)
"As Mama ironed, she taught. Her methods were simple: endless songs and stories and Bible verses for us to memorize. I sat enthralled, watching, and waiting for the day I could iron the dish towels, then the starched pillowcases, and then graduate to Papa's white handkerchiefs, which had to be perfectly folded." (p. 38)
"Papa then left to visit the widows and orphans, but not without a word of caution from Mama about the widows." (p. 39)
"Mama never wavered." (p. 50)
(Then I was hurrying to finish the book and didn't stop to flag anything else.)
It drives me nuts that in the repeated pattern on the cover background, one coffee cup is missing. How has no one ever missed that and fixed it?
July 9, 2013
One of my all-time favorites; it has been on my nightstand for nearly 30 years. The story of Margaret Jensen's Norwegian mother and how she raised a family while married to an itinerant Baptist preacher. It's a book about a mother who raised children with daily routines and a Bible. A strong woman with a steadfast faith, she tended to the needs of the congregation or any other passerby with a problem, with coffee first. Coffee, the symbol of hospitality, comfort, routine, she was the practical counselor, doling out her wisdom and practical advice over a cup of coffee. Hers was a life well-lived. As a young mother when it was published, I was very inspired and "advised" by her in raising my own children. Later, I found out the author's son, R. Judson Carlberg was the president of my college from 1992-2011. What a small world.
November 28, 2024
Some memoirs are written for the grandkids. Gosh, some are really just written for yourself. But then there are the ones that are for the world. That’s “First We Have Coffee.” Steeped in Scandinavian roots, devout faith, and quirky personalities, the book follows several generations through both brutally difficult and idyllic seasons, with warmth and wisdom.
That special cup of Scandinavian coffee, served up hot, any time of day or night, shows up over the years as this energy-boost of unflappable courage that once consumed, can, by the power of God, face down any conflict, weather any storm.
Even though the book was written over a generation ago, and leans into its particular ethnic roots, it has a deeply endearing timelessness that resonates down through the years and across cultural bounds. We see immigrants scrapping for existence, helping neighbors, church politics, family dysfunctions, God’s call, pulling up roots, whispered secrets, broken dreams, new starts.
We can all relate to the brokenness and hard parts of life. And we would do well to pull up a chair, sit tight, and be reminded by author Margaret Jensen of the power of God to bring healing and beauty through the mess. So we brew a steaming mug of coffee and lean in.
~Jen
That special cup of Scandinavian coffee, served up hot, any time of day or night, shows up over the years as this energy-boost of unflappable courage that once consumed, can, by the power of God, face down any conflict, weather any storm.
Even though the book was written over a generation ago, and leans into its particular ethnic roots, it has a deeply endearing timelessness that resonates down through the years and across cultural bounds. We see immigrants scrapping for existence, helping neighbors, church politics, family dysfunctions, God’s call, pulling up roots, whispered secrets, broken dreams, new starts.
We can all relate to the brokenness and hard parts of life. And we would do well to pull up a chair, sit tight, and be reminded by author Margaret Jensen of the power of God to bring healing and beauty through the mess. So we brew a steaming mug of coffee and lean in.
~Jen
August 13, 2023
A sweet, humorous and inspiring tribute to the author's mother -- a woman of great faith, humble service, loyal devotion, and endless coffee.
I knocked off a star because the dad is problematic.
I knocked off a star because the dad is problematic.
July 6, 2017
This book. It is just so amazing. The way God moved through Margaret's family is just so encouraging and inspiring. I would recommend this book to anyone and everyone! A must read and a great read aloud. Just. So. Amazing. That's all I can say.
November 6, 2024
My aunt recommended “First We Have Coffee” to me. Author Margaret Jensen writes about her childhood, growing up in the US and Canada, with an emphasis on her Mama. Her parents came over from Norway as young people, and her father is a pastor. Papa loves books, but he struggles more with people, and comes across as a difficult person. “Taking Mama by the hand, walking and talking to her about the beauty around them never occurred to him. He silently loved Mama. She understood.” “Papa seldom showed affection to Mama’s children. We obeyed his stern commands — quickly!” The family had several children, one of whom died young.
The undisputed star of the book is Mama, a woman with a rock-solid faith in God despite a life that was often challenging: “‘God entrusted Papa to me,’ she would say. ‘God knew I would love him, care for him, believe in him — and always understand him. In turn God made a promise to me — that all my children shall be taught of the Lord. God never fails.'” Mama was caring and kind, both to her family and to others.
The book details several fascinating, miraculous-type things that happened to the family. Once, when Papa is between jobs and they are low on cash, they pass a restaurant where the Asian owner insists on feeding them all a meal. Papa promises to come back and pay. When he goes looking for the restaurant, several months later, it is gone and in fact no building appeared to have ever existed in that spot, which was an open field. Asking in town, no one knew anything about a restaurant in that area. “We became convinced that our host was an angel,” Papa said.
There are funny stories too: in an attempt to save money, Mama buys dye to change the color of an existing hat to match a dress she will wear to speak to a ladies’ group. It’s a hot day, and to her horror, the dye begins to run and drip down her face and clothes as she speaks. The tale of Mama’s hat was brought up with laughter for many years afterwards.
Mama wasn’t a total pushover with Papa; I enjoyed one story about the family moving. Papa kept insisting that there was no room on the truck for Mama’s sewing machine, while Mama distracted Papa, telling the movers that the machine did indeed need to go with them (“there are some things he doesn’t understand”). Back and forth it went, on and off the truck, but thankfully the sewing machine did make it to their next home.
I enjoyed “First We Have Coffee” and would recommend it. It’s a light, easy read that will strengthen your faith.
The undisputed star of the book is Mama, a woman with a rock-solid faith in God despite a life that was often challenging: “‘God entrusted Papa to me,’ she would say. ‘God knew I would love him, care for him, believe in him — and always understand him. In turn God made a promise to me — that all my children shall be taught of the Lord. God never fails.'” Mama was caring and kind, both to her family and to others.
The book details several fascinating, miraculous-type things that happened to the family. Once, when Papa is between jobs and they are low on cash, they pass a restaurant where the Asian owner insists on feeding them all a meal. Papa promises to come back and pay. When he goes looking for the restaurant, several months later, it is gone and in fact no building appeared to have ever existed in that spot, which was an open field. Asking in town, no one knew anything about a restaurant in that area. “We became convinced that our host was an angel,” Papa said.
There are funny stories too: in an attempt to save money, Mama buys dye to change the color of an existing hat to match a dress she will wear to speak to a ladies’ group. It’s a hot day, and to her horror, the dye begins to run and drip down her face and clothes as she speaks. The tale of Mama’s hat was brought up with laughter for many years afterwards.
Mama wasn’t a total pushover with Papa; I enjoyed one story about the family moving. Papa kept insisting that there was no room on the truck for Mama’s sewing machine, while Mama distracted Papa, telling the movers that the machine did indeed need to go with them (“there are some things he doesn’t understand”). Back and forth it went, on and off the truck, but thankfully the sewing machine did make it to their next home.
I enjoyed “First We Have Coffee” and would recommend it. It’s a light, easy read that will strengthen your faith.
January 13, 2020
I read this through yesterday afternoon and evening and really enjoyed it. Many times throughout I felt convicted and challenged to live a more intentional, people-focused life. To love more deeply and forgive more freely. Every story was meaningful and there was no rambling. I usually avoid short story compilations but this one surprised and fully blessed me!
I loved the chapter called Tests. This family experienced so many awesome miracles. I found myself stopping to pray that God would do similar things in my own life. Do I have that much faith? Or time? I must be intentional.
I could relate to Mama in the story, The Touch. Most of the time, God chooses to give me immunity, strength and/or healing, rather than rest or days of care by others. This is a time in my life when I am needed to care for my family so the actual rest days are precious and few.
My favorite quote from the book was, "When you have heart room you have house room." I'm not super great at offering hospitality. I must be intentional.
I loved the chapter called Tests. This family experienced so many awesome miracles. I found myself stopping to pray that God would do similar things in my own life. Do I have that much faith? Or time? I must be intentional.
I could relate to Mama in the story, The Touch. Most of the time, God chooses to give me immunity, strength and/or healing, rather than rest or days of care by others. This is a time in my life when I am needed to care for my family so the actual rest days are precious and few.
My favorite quote from the book was, "When you have heart room you have house room." I'm not super great at offering hospitality. I must be intentional.
January 2, 2025
This book surprised me. I started reading it as someone told me it’s their favorite, and I’ll read anyone’s favorite book. I almost gave up in the first couple chapters as it felt like a very slow story that shared very scattered and ordinary moments of family life. And in a sense, that is what the whole book is. You could jump in and read any chapter and grasp the essence of the whole book. There’s nothing specific that is extraordinary, exciting, or really of note to mention in a book review. It wasn’t even funny.
But what it is is a faithful woman who loved the Lord, her husband, and her family. And the whole of the woman and her faithful life is extraordinary and beautiful. Definitely not a book for everyone, but for those who enjoy Christian biographies/women I think this might be enjoyable.
But what it is is a faithful woman who loved the Lord, her husband, and her family. And the whole of the woman and her faithful life is extraordinary and beautiful. Definitely not a book for everyone, but for those who enjoy Christian biographies/women I think this might be enjoyable.
February 19, 2023
This book was a balm to my soul. A beautiful tribute from a daughter to her mother. As a preacher’s daughter and a preacher’s wife, I related to a lot of her experiences. My husband’s side of the family has Norwegian roots, so I also enjoyed the stories of growing up in a Norwegian family.
Almost every chapter brought me to tears. There is so much wisdom contained in this book. It’s a wonderful example of a mother who gave her life to her children, made a home, trusted God in everything. I found a mentor in these pages, and I’m sure I will return to them again and again.
Almost every chapter brought me to tears. There is so much wisdom contained in this book. It’s a wonderful example of a mother who gave her life to her children, made a home, trusted God in everything. I found a mentor in these pages, and I’m sure I will return to them again and again.
February 11, 2025
Such an amazing book. The author speaks about her mother and the way that her gentle manners, faith and generosity kept their family afloat. There are a lot of little incidents where her mother's actions kept together, what otherwise would have been broken. Beautiful. This was such an inspiring book.
April 8, 2020
Sweet, folksy memoir about Baptist Norwegian immigrants that I picked up at my husband's grandmother's house. Reminded me of my own Norwegian grandparents, even though they were quite different and immigrated over seventy years later.
November 2, 2024
My favorite book this year so far.
A collection of true stories shared by the daughter of Norwegian immigrants, a pastor and his wife, of her family as she grows up. Mainly focused on her mother’s strength, kindness, faith in the Lord, and her hospitality. Beautiful and inspiring!
A collection of true stories shared by the daughter of Norwegian immigrants, a pastor and his wife, of her family as she grows up. Mainly focused on her mother’s strength, kindness, faith in the Lord, and her hospitality. Beautiful and inspiring!
July 5, 2013
I would give it 2.5 stars if I could because it was better than okay but I can't quite say I liked it. The writing itself was distracting because it didn't flow well in many places...so many times I found it fragmented and almost quit reading it. It was interesting to hear what life was like for this family; some of the stories were quite poignant. It's too bad they couldn't have been tied together better. In spite of that, I came away with inspiration...the author's mother had great faith in God. She trusted God, no matter how bad the circumstances, and lived a life that glorified God.
November 8, 2007
This book was very different. I’m not sure what to say about it or how to classify it.
It’s easy to read and enjoyable, but I didn’t really get that much out of it.
It was sort of a “tribute” to the author’s mother and was mainly about growing up with her. Their life was rather interesting, but not all that exciting.
All in all, it was good and if you have a spare moment, it’s worth glancing at anyway.
It’s easy to read and enjoyable, but I didn’t really get that much out of it.
It was sort of a “tribute” to the author’s mother and was mainly about growing up with her. Their life was rather interesting, but not all that exciting.
All in all, it was good and if you have a spare moment, it’s worth glancing at anyway.
January 26, 2025
Next year I'm going to be more thoughtful about which book I read and review first since this is the review which will show up on my book challenge. Not that this is an awful book, I just like better the second book I read this year. This is actually a re-read for me. I decided I would re-read a book each month, read one of the hundreds of books on my tbr list, and read one book of my choice (or make that a book chosen by each of the two book groups to which I attend). I read this book around 1982 when it first came out. I went on to read three more of Jensen's books, including one about her father which is a story that somewhat explains her father's actions in this book (if I'm recalling correctly).
I chose to re-read it because I offered it to my mother to read while she was staying with me. I thought it would be the perfect book for her. Yet, she said it was okay. She didn't really get into it! It was Christian and filled with scripture verses, something I don't normally care for when it feels forced, but the verses coming out of the mouths of Jensen's parents seem so natural, a part of the story of two Norwegian immigrants who came to America still in their teens in the 1910s or so and were in the ministry.
My mom couldn't "put her finger on" why the book was challenging to her so these are my best guesses. Jensen does include Norwegian phrases. She explains them inferentially or in context in conversation. The writing is a bit stilted (as other readers noted). Think of this book as a Norwegian immigrant memoir and not a polished novel. The early 1900s were not today's world. Papa's actions are totally unacceptable now (or at least I hope they are!). One would think the actions would be totally unacceptable back then as well, but it is a memoir, and as one reader wrote, "Jensen is charitable in writing about her father." I had forgotten one of the final stories in this book, and it shocked me as much this time as it did when I first read it. Not shocked as in risque or something for which my mother would burn the book, but an action which elicited an audible gasp from me. My mom is not stridently progressive when it comes to her life as a wife, mother, etc., but she was born probably close to 20 years after Jensen, so these situations could be off-putting or maybe it's because she did not put up with the situations that Jensen's mom lived through and thrived. I don't know. I still found the book worth reading, not necessarily to learn to live my life the way Twetens did, but to walk in the shoes of Norwegian immigrants in the early 1900s. (Plus Jensen's mom actually earned honor from Norway and from America for her social work. No one except her family probably remembers her name, but she did much good. That is something to ponder!)
I chose to re-read it because I offered it to my mother to read while she was staying with me. I thought it would be the perfect book for her. Yet, she said it was okay. She didn't really get into it! It was Christian and filled with scripture verses, something I don't normally care for when it feels forced, but the verses coming out of the mouths of Jensen's parents seem so natural, a part of the story of two Norwegian immigrants who came to America still in their teens in the 1910s or so and were in the ministry.
My mom couldn't "put her finger on" why the book was challenging to her so these are my best guesses. Jensen does include Norwegian phrases. She explains them inferentially or in context in conversation. The writing is a bit stilted (as other readers noted). Think of this book as a Norwegian immigrant memoir and not a polished novel. The early 1900s were not today's world. Papa's actions are totally unacceptable now (or at least I hope they are!). One would think the actions would be totally unacceptable back then as well, but it is a memoir, and as one reader wrote, "Jensen is charitable in writing about her father." I had forgotten one of the final stories in this book, and it shocked me as much this time as it did when I first read it. Not shocked as in risque or something for which my mother would burn the book, but an action which elicited an audible gasp from me. My mom is not stridently progressive when it comes to her life as a wife, mother, etc., but she was born probably close to 20 years after Jensen, so these situations could be off-putting or maybe it's because she did not put up with the situations that Jensen's mom lived through and thrived. I don't know. I still found the book worth reading, not necessarily to learn to live my life the way Twetens did, but to walk in the shoes of Norwegian immigrants in the early 1900s. (Plus Jensen's mom actually earned honor from Norway and from America for her social work. No one except her family probably remembers her name, but she did much good. That is something to ponder!)
October 10, 2025
A dear friend gave me this book, having read it 35 years prior, and having loved it. It’s a sweet compilation of memories of her life and growing up with a very patient, long suffering and godly mother - and a possibly borderline or on the spectrum father who often trusted God to a point of near neglect of his family. It seemed like the daughter, who is the author, was willing to idolize and overlook a lot of shortcomings in her father for his faith in God and dedication to ministry… but as a more modern reader, and especially one who is married and a mother with a devoted husband who also works in ministry, I felt it was a bit toxic: the way this father would leave his family without adequate provisions or money for unknown periods of time and just trust God to take care of them.
That said, there are some pretty cool stories of how God did show up for them that are really beautiful and edifying. I just found the book to be written with a bit too much esteem for what seemed to be the reality and it felt a bit sentimentalized or cheesy at times. But I loved the Scandinavian bits and how much they loved coffee, how devoted and patient and trusting in God the mother was!
So… all in all a bit cheesy and rose colored glasses for an actually imperfect family (or particularly father) but some really sweet stories and easy read. It’s quite old and I think perhaps how we communicate or even view personal biographies has shifted since it was originally written.
That said, there are some pretty cool stories of how God did show up for them that are really beautiful and edifying. I just found the book to be written with a bit too much esteem for what seemed to be the reality and it felt a bit sentimentalized or cheesy at times. But I loved the Scandinavian bits and how much they loved coffee, how devoted and patient and trusting in God the mother was!
So… all in all a bit cheesy and rose colored glasses for an actually imperfect family (or particularly father) but some really sweet stories and easy read. It’s quite old and I think perhaps how we communicate or even view personal biographies has shifted since it was originally written.
March 10, 2025
A sweet tribute by Margaret Jensen to her mother, Elvine Tweton. She lived a life of devotion to Christ and had a very strong, active faith in a God who hears and answers. She was able to experience miracles of provision due to her unwavering belief that God would take care of His own. Her husband was difficult at times but she was patient and a wonderful helpmeet to him and an admirable mother to their children throughout their lives which consisted mostly of severe poverty. But God never let them go hungry and Elvine became incredibly resourceful as well. The older I get, the more I understand that people are complex; that we all need to exercise grace as well as receive it. That everyone is human and has faults and weakness and that humility is a rare quality, even among Christians. I had a hard time keeping the characters and setting straight in the first couple of chapters. The book is a little choppy like that.
November 10, 2018
My dear sister-in-law recommended this book to me, and I must say that I am forever grateful that she did! What an amazing, heartwarming account of the author’s mother, Elvine Tweten! Her life was a living testimony to the God she served so faithfully. She was the wife of a pastor who preached tirelessly to the Scandinavian immigrants in both Canada and the United States for 68 years. “Mama” had such a loving, approachable spirit and she spent her life ministering to all who were sent her way, from neighbors to orphans to perfect strangers. She also left a legacy of faith to her 6 children, who in turn, passed it on to their children. Mama Tweten “walked a road of simple obedience to God’s ways,” and her love of her Lord and Savior permeated all she did. This is a book that I plan to reread. I highly recommend it!
September 5, 2024
Read this decades ago and picked up a copy at a library book sale for another go. It’s a memoir about growing up Norwegian American, the daughter of two immigrants—a Baptist pastor and his wonderful wife, the “Mama” around whom most of the stories evolve. The author is careful to be charitable toward “Papa.” But he would have been hard to live with. Both of from a different world, one they tried to preserve for their children by passing on Old Country / Christian values. I am of two minds on Mama’s commitment to always defend, forgive, and accept Papa despite his many shortcomings. Our culture, more and more, would say he was abusive and neglectful and she should leave. But she considered her marriage a sacred trust from God, and found joy in it.
May 17, 2021
I purchased this book after reading a glowing review. The author is a storyteller and published author and the contents of this small book give the reader short glimpses of life in her Norwegian home. Her father was a preacher who heard the "call" several places and each place presented challenges and rewards that are documented in the book. Her mother was the bedrock of the family holding together five children in less than easy circumstances.
Margaret's warm stories of life as the daughter of a Scandinavian pastor in Canada touches readers' hearts with timeless lessons of unwavering faith and family love.
Margaret's warm stories of life as the daughter of a Scandinavian pastor in Canada touches readers' hearts with timeless lessons of unwavering faith and family love.
December 12, 2016
As someone who specializes in reading memoirs of dysfunctional families and unpleasant childhoods [1], I am often struck by elements that make a book distinctive. This book had a very distinctive set of elements that is worth pointing out, at least. For one, the childhood experiences of the author were unpleasant for different reasons than normal. She wasn't abused as a child and her parents stayed married, although her mother came from a broken household and that added to elements of brokenness in the family as a whole. Also, her father was remote and emotionally distant, being focused on books and not so much on people. Both of the author's parents were first generation Norwegian immigrants, and the author's father happened to be a pastor who heard the call or was voted out by the members, and had to move from place to place because of his work in the ministry. So, if you want to read about how growing up in a poor and somewhat overly full household of preacher's kids makes one have a dysfunctional childhood, and that is quite honestly something I am willing to do, this is a good book for you to read. The book was written in the late 1970's, probably at the beginning of the trend towards writing memoirs about unpleasant childhoods, and it manages to be both honest and written with a great deal of love and kindness, especially for the author's mother.
The book itself consists of fairly short and slightly connected stories in a generally chronological order that extend from the childhood of the author's mother to the death of the author's mother in old age from a failing heart. These stories take up a little less than 200 pages of writing, and are filled with odd touches, like poems, quotations of familiar Christian songs, and passages about the Bible. The author manages to strike an odd balance between being unsentimental and being deeply sentimental in some pointed quotations [2]. The stories themselves mix comedy with loss, including death, homelessness, poverty, and a lack of parental love and care. It is easy to see in ourselves the sort of wounded people who wound others--the author's father is shown as being emotionally distant and very strict, and far more caring towards his books than his own children, a reminder of how it would be easy for someone who was emotionally reserved and restrained to be viewed in a negative light. Many of the stories are tied together by the author's mother's insistence that before discussing anything too serious or unpleasant, first we have coffee.
There are a lot of insights that can be gained from a book like this. For one, this book gives a vivid impression of the importance of ethnic communities and in people like ministers and those who run orphanages like the author's father and mother, respectively, in helping to keep a community together. The author's family is full of love and more than a little bit of mischief, and also struggles to communicate and get along even as each family member manages to find a niche that allows them to care for others and show a sense of dignity and pride. Given the way that serving in the ministry is often associated as being a position of considerable wealth and power, this book is a reminder that in not all cases is this so. The author does not remember or picture her father as a golf-playing resident of a country club as is the manner of some ministers, but rather as a man struggling with the finer points of the English language but someone who loves old books and has too many kids that he did not know how to relate to. It is yet another type of brokenness I can understand in my own awkward way.
[1] See, for example:
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2013...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
[2] See, for example:
"Heeding Mama's admonition to "settle down with a good wife," Barney finally married a comfortable friend, Mildred, who was solid, faithful, and strong and became his harbor in the storms of life (32)."
"When someone brings us a frightened, wilted, hurt child, I hear my Susie say, 'Love it back to life, Mother!' So many human relationships can be loved back to life. For me, the most rewarding are those with a child, who has been wilted and abandoned in a broken flower pot or home (122)."
"The text this morning is found in Mark 11:25: "When ye stand praying, forgive." Forgiveness is not optional, but a command. Forgiveness is not a feeling, but an act of faith, a definite act of the will to forgive, in obedience to God's command. The feeling comes later, the feeling of peace. When we offer to God our hurts and despair, God will pour his love and compassion into the wounds and His healing will come (131)."
The book itself consists of fairly short and slightly connected stories in a generally chronological order that extend from the childhood of the author's mother to the death of the author's mother in old age from a failing heart. These stories take up a little less than 200 pages of writing, and are filled with odd touches, like poems, quotations of familiar Christian songs, and passages about the Bible. The author manages to strike an odd balance between being unsentimental and being deeply sentimental in some pointed quotations [2]. The stories themselves mix comedy with loss, including death, homelessness, poverty, and a lack of parental love and care. It is easy to see in ourselves the sort of wounded people who wound others--the author's father is shown as being emotionally distant and very strict, and far more caring towards his books than his own children, a reminder of how it would be easy for someone who was emotionally reserved and restrained to be viewed in a negative light. Many of the stories are tied together by the author's mother's insistence that before discussing anything too serious or unpleasant, first we have coffee.
There are a lot of insights that can be gained from a book like this. For one, this book gives a vivid impression of the importance of ethnic communities and in people like ministers and those who run orphanages like the author's father and mother, respectively, in helping to keep a community together. The author's family is full of love and more than a little bit of mischief, and also struggles to communicate and get along even as each family member manages to find a niche that allows them to care for others and show a sense of dignity and pride. Given the way that serving in the ministry is often associated as being a position of considerable wealth and power, this book is a reminder that in not all cases is this so. The author does not remember or picture her father as a golf-playing resident of a country club as is the manner of some ministers, but rather as a man struggling with the finer points of the English language but someone who loves old books and has too many kids that he did not know how to relate to. It is yet another type of brokenness I can understand in my own awkward way.
[1] See, for example:
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2013...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...
[2] See, for example:
"Heeding Mama's admonition to "settle down with a good wife," Barney finally married a comfortable friend, Mildred, who was solid, faithful, and strong and became his harbor in the storms of life (32)."
"When someone brings us a frightened, wilted, hurt child, I hear my Susie say, 'Love it back to life, Mother!' So many human relationships can be loved back to life. For me, the most rewarding are those with a child, who has been wilted and abandoned in a broken flower pot or home (122)."
"The text this morning is found in Mark 11:25: "When ye stand praying, forgive." Forgiveness is not optional, but a command. Forgiveness is not a feeling, but an act of faith, a definite act of the will to forgive, in obedience to God's command. The feeling comes later, the feeling of peace. When we offer to God our hurts and despair, God will pour his love and compassion into the wounds and His healing will come (131)."
September 30, 2017
Warm stories of growing up in a pastor's home in Canada. I particularly liked the mother who "threw her apron over her head" when she needed a refuge. The father's preaching involved "golden oratory about the glories of the old country (Scandanavia), always adding a stern admonition to bring honor to the new land."
July 1, 2019
One of my favorite reads...a beautiful story of a Norwegian family that came to America and served God and family. Brought memories back of my grandparents and times in the old Norwegian church and the string band. :) Brought tears to my eyes as I became a part of this family. i hope my girls will someday read this book.
January 10, 2024
It’s one of those books, despite its simplicity, that leaves you mourning someone who died before you were born and homesick for a place only called “home” by ancestors a century ago. It convicts you of God’s high calling in motherhood and gives hope and motivation to provide your own children with the intimate knowledge God’s word.
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