21 Rituals to Change Your Life: Daily Practices to Bring Greater Inner Peace and Happiness

by Theresa Cheung

Creating personal ritual in our lives allows us to bring the presence of the sacred into the everyday. The rituals in this book have been designed as symbolic acts providing a framework for anyone to use to create positive change in their lives. The 7 morning rituals are designed to help you 'wake with determination', the 7 afternoon rituals focus on 'living on purpose', and the 7 evening rituals are about 'retiring with satisfaction'.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Spirituality

262 pages, Kindle Edition

Published March 16, 2017

About the author

Theresa Cheung is an internationally bestselling author and public speaker. She has been writing about spirituality, dreams and the paranormal for the past 35 years, and was listed by Watkins Mind Body and Spirit magazine as one of the 100 most spiritually influential living people in 2023. She has a degree in Theology and English from Kings College, Cambridge University, frequently collaborating with leading scientists and neuroscientists researching consciousness.

Theresa is regularly featured in national newspapers and magazines, and she is a frequent radio, podcast and television guest. She hosts her own popular spiritual podcast called White Shores and her own weekly UK Health Radio show: The Healing Power of Your Dreams.

Reviews

[Kat · Rating 2 out of 5]

First I'll say that the content of this book isn't bad but the delivery kind of is. The author makes this big fuss about how these aren't habits, they're rituals because rituals are so special and blah blah blah. Some of the 21 things she recommends can definitely be part of a ritual or routine, but others I think is really a stretch to insist they are each individual RITUALS!!!

That said, the 21 suggestions are basic but still good mindfulness habits that would be beneficial to anyone, but probably totally overwhelming to anyone who doesn't already do some of them. They are divided up into 3 groups of 7 that you complete in the morning, afternoon, and evening for 21 days. You do each of the tasks everyday and if you miss one you have to start the 21 days all over again, which is really setting people up for failure and frustration.

Some of these things I already do everyday, and a few sound kind of stupid (like take a selfie every night and tell your picture you love yourself, I'm not a Kardashian ma'am).

If you can get this book for free at the library then sure, read it and adopt what "rituals" you like. Otherwise I wouldn't recommend spending your money on it.

[Meghan Davis strader · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got some good advice, some I instinctively knew (sleep with your phone charging in another room) and some I had never heard of (use a daylight lamp alarm clock to wake up more naturally). It was a really quick read and I have some really good rituals to try for the next 21 days!

[Lo Scaffale Imbarcato · Rating 3 out of 5]

Questo libro si basa su una grande verità: la cifra dell'uomo risiede in ciò che abitualmente fa ogni giorno, non in una (seppur rimarchevole) azione isolata.
Il metodo che Theresa Cheung (il cui curriculum spazia nel campo della spiritualità e del soprannaturale) propone ai suoi lettori è molto schematico e strutturato: 21 rituali distribuiti lungo la giornata, da eseguire per almeno 21 giorni consecutivi. Naturalmente si tratta di rituali laici, e nemmeno troppo complessi da mettere in pratica: per lo più si tratta di piccole azioni che non richiedono più di qualche minuto ciascuno (ad esempio ascoltare una canzone, mettere qualcosa in ordine, prestare ascolto a qualcuno, eccetera). Molti di questi "rituali" sono azioni che già compiamo ogni giorno (chi non sorriderebbe alla cassiera del supermercato o al barista che ci fa il caffè?), ma il metodo di Theresa Cheung richiede di prestare attenzione e consapevolezza. A fondamento di questi rituali infatti c'è il grande potere dell'autosuggestione e buone dosi di mindfulness, condite da tanto pensiero positivo.
Scritto in modo molto semplice, leggero e convincente, è costellato di citazioni motivazionali come i classici manuali di auto-aiuto, ed è sostenuto da un'ampia bibliografia di studi scientifici.
La domanda che sorge spontanea è: funziona?
Onestamente non so dirlo con certezza (non ho ancora messo in pratica tutti i rituali per i 21 giorni richiesti). Sono sicuro però che, se si è dotati di sufficiente apertura mentale e soprattutto voglia di migliorare la propria esistenza, questo piccolo manuale ha buone possibilità di aiutare a raggiungere l'obiettivo.

[Deirdre · Rating 3 out of 5]

at least 2 problems with this Now from a lot of the books I've read recently on improving my life, I've noticed that they suggest trying one new thing at a time.  Theresa Cheung suggests doing all 21 of these at a time.  And if you fail to do them for the 21 days straight you have to start again.  I believe this is what is called setting someone up to fail.
 
Secondly; getting out of bed earlier isn't a ritual, nor is taking a selfie to me a ritual.  These are just two of the HABITS she suggests trying, some are a bit more ritualistic but to me a ritual style bath, for example, involves laying out the soft robes for afterwards, selecting a candle and bath smells, picking the book(s) and drink and music and turning off notifications before slipping into the warm water and r e l a x. That's more of a ritual and what I kinda expected out of this book.  How to make the experiences of your life more special.
 
I also spotted that one of the cititations was from the Daily Fail.  Really?
 
It might suit someone looking to inject a little something more into their lives but, and it's a big but, I would do a few at a time, they're split into morning, evening and night and I'd pick one from each to try for 21 days and then maybe add more, but it's very prescriptive and not everyone functions the same.  We are not all interchangeable and ritual should exhalt that not swallow it.

[Kairit Leibold · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kõigepealt tuleb vahele jätta või hambad ristis lugeda ära 29 lehekülge targutamist teemal, et seni olid sa õnnetu loll, aga nüüd oled õnnega koos, sest just ainult selles raamatus toodavate rituaalide abil õpid õigesti/päriselt elama. Mulle lihtsalt ei meeldi selline suurustav stiil ja eelarvamus, et eneseabiraamatuid loevad ainult väga suures hädas ja äärmiselt suurte enesehinnanguprobleemidega inimesed.
Rituaalid ise on aga suuremas osas väga head meeldetuletused, et elada tuleb täiel rinnal, hoida fookust endale tähtsatel asjadel, ennast väärtustada ja armastada ning oma energiat ja sära siis ka teistele jagada. Autor rõhutab, et positiivne mõtlemine on oluline, kuid see üksi ei vii edasi, tuleb ka tegutseda ning muidugi olen selles osas temaga igati nõus.
Raamat on meeldivalt praktiline ning väga hästi liigendatud. Iga peatükk kirjeldab ühte rituaali ning on jagatud osadeks. Soovi korral võid näiteks jätta igas peatükis (eriti teist korda lugedes) vahele alajaotuse "Eluline näide", sest need tunduvad mõnikord veidi liialdatud või must-valged lood, mis ei anna tegelikult ka uut infot.
Ostsin endale kohe pärast lugemise lõpetamist eraldi kaustiku ja plaanin järgmised 21 päeva tõesti neid rituaale järgida. Tundub, et need ei tohiks võtta liiga palju aega, aga võib-olla muudavad elu ja inimesi tõesti tähendusrikkamateks ning igapäevaseid tegevusi mõtestatumateks.
Küllap lisan pärast 21 päeva siiagi kommentaari ... kohtumiseni!

21 päeva sai mööda, harjutasin hoolega ja võin kokkuvõtvalt öelda, et see oli huvitav ning mõned rituaalid jäävad kindlasti mu ellu vähemalt mingiks ajaks (võib-olla midagi isegi elu lõpuni) mõnda asja olin juba varem teinud ja need kinnistusid nüüd veelgi tugevamalt. Kuigi raamat on ilmselt rohkem orienteeritud konkreetsemale edu saavutamisele, siis minu jaoks kõnetasid pigem üldisemad asjad. Põhiline väärtus seisnes minu jaoks selles, et elasin justkui natuke rohkem täie rinnaga, sest väärtustasin päeva jooksul mitme rituaali abil nii hetki kui ennast kui olemasolevat. Hästi lihtsad igapäevased asjad nagu kraanist jooksev soe vesi, mitmekülgne maitsev toit, füüsiline heaolu, head suhted abikaasa, laste ja sõpradega jne jne võivad neile tähelepanu pööramata tunduda iseenesestmõistetavad ning me unustame kõige selle eest tänulikud olla, aga tänulikkuse tundmine on meile ja teistele tõepoolest hea. Samas ei leia ma mingit vajadust näiteks iga päev kohustuslikus korras minevikust lahtilaskmisega tegeleda, sest ma vist omal moel teen seda jooksvalt, aga ainult siis, kui miskit pinnale kerkib.Hakata mingit jama ise mälusoppidest üles kergitama, et neist siis vabaneda, ma lihtsalt ei näe selleks vajadust. "Kõrgema selfi" tegemine igal õhtul (panin need tõesti isegi oma FB-s eraldi albumisse üles) on ka asi, mis on rohkem nagu ühekordne mäng väljakutsena, aga minu arust täiesti piisab, kui õhtul peegli ees nägu puhastades lehvitada mõttes lahkuvale päevale ja olla uudishimulik saabuva osas, põgus naeratus, tänutunne ja tuttu, see telefonifoto ei tundu absoluutselt vajalik, kuigi oli väljakutsena omamoodi lõbus mäng.
Igatahes soovitan raamatut lugeda ja endale sobilikud rituaalid välja valida ning kasutada. Arvan, et ainult lugedes ei ole võimalik aru saada, mis neist saavad omaks ja mis mitte, seega oleks mõistlik tõesti need 21 päeva võtta ja reaalselt läbi katestada.

[Simona · Rating 3 out of 5]

Un libro molto interessante .
Se state cercando qualcosa che possa rilassare la mente e interessare all’ambito della mindfulness, questo è un libro che fa al caso vostro.
Una volta iniziata la lettura quotidiana(come anche consiglia l’autrice) ci si rende conto che cambiare la propria routine attraverso semplici azioni quotidiane, può effettivamente svoltare la tua giornata e i tuoi pensieri.
Adesso a distanza di mesi, ricordo ancora dei punti che tutt’ora sto adottando.
Consiglio!

[Sam Arnold · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great self help book written in an easy format. The author’s voice is easy to understand and makes the material free flowing to read. I love some of the techniques and will be trying some of them. A great read for anyone trying to make a difference in their life.

[Ohana Ferrari · Rating 4 out of 5]

A well organised selection of some of the most well known good habits. It is really simple, but exactly what I needed.

Summary (of those which I find relevant):

1. WAKE WITH DETERMINATION

WAKE UP EARLIER (and stretch)
Why?
It’s better if you find your own why. But the point is: we have to have a goal that makes us WANT to get up earlier.


ASK YOURSELF ONE QUESTION
“For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “ if today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “no” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something” Steve Jobs


JUST BREATHE DEEPLY
Why?
“It improves heath and prevents disease by increasing oxygen supply and removing carbon dioxide and other toxins from the body. It encourages better sleep, lowers blood pressure, improves our nervous system and increases circulation. It is great for weight control as the extra oxygen encourages fat burning and because increased blood flow improves digestion. Other benefits include pain and stress relief and an increase in happiness because when you breathe deep you release endorphins, the feel-good chemicals in the body. Last, it encourages a good posture because when you breathe deep you tend to stand or sit up straight and the benefits of good posture for general health and for presenting a confident image to the world are well recorded.”


SMILE IN THE MIRROR
Why?
“Even a fake smile makes you feel better, it involves facial-muscle activity around the eyes that produces a change in brain activity and mood. Smiling can reduce stress and be as energising as a good night’s sleep. Smiling more during your day you also lift the moods of others: if one person sees another smiling, neurones in that person’s brain that are wired for sociability light up as if they were actually smiling themselves.”
Tip: smiling while doing something you dislike but would rather like can help resignifying your relationship with that activity inside your brain. In other words, if you smile (even if forced) during your work out for example, you might start liking it over time.


SEE THE FINISH LINE
“Visualize this thing you want. See it. Feel it. Believe in it. Create your mental blue print and begin.” Robert Collier
Why?
“This will create a picture for your mind that your daily life can mirror. Neurones in your brain interpret imagery as equivalent to real-life action.”
“To achieve great things we must first dream, then visualize, then plan, believe and act.” Alfred A Montapert


2. LIVE ON PURPOSE

TIDY THINGS
why?
“Stress hormone cortisol is released when we are surrounded by disorder, so the first thing to benefit from a tidy up is the health. Next things to benefit is your concentration and creativity. A study has shown clutter distracts attention and the result is a decrease in performance and focus. Clutter essentially makes your brain multitask rather than focus on the task in hand. Another study showed people who sleep in untidy rooms are more likely to have sleeping disorders.“


FILL YOUR OWN CUP
Why?
“A beverage break is the perfect moment to give yourself a moment of peace and self-love. Coffee and tea drinkers are said to be less likely to contract a number of diseases and cognitive decline is reduced.”


LET IT GO
why?
“Research suggests negative emotions, like fear, anger and guilt, release chemicals into your body that can weaken immunity and cause major illnesses, fatigue and poor health in general. Bad feelings can also act as a warning sign alerting us what isn’t working. So the key is to learn how to deal with negative feelings. Suppressing them will damage your health and psychological wellbeing, acknowledging them, learning from them and then releasing them will increase your chances of health and happiness.”
Instead of: why is this happening to me?
We should ask: what is this teaching me?


SAY A LITTLE PRAYER
“It’s based on the very simple concept of knowing what you want and believing you can have it.”


LIGHT SOMEONE UP
“The true greatness of a person, in my view, is evident in the way he or she treats those with whom courtesy and kindness are not required”
The benefits?
“The helper’s high (feel-good chemicals): mood enhancer, less anxiety, increase social confidence, make you feel more optimistic, positive and appreciative of what you already have, it’s a way to ease stress and find a sense of inner calm and peace. Help others empowers you to help yourself.
The third-party effect: if anyone else sees or even just hears about someone being helped it spurs them on to do something good for others. So one good deed really can make the world a better place.
People don’t forget: people tend to remember not what you said or did but how you made them feel.”
“Whether one believes in religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn’t anyone who doesn’t appreciate kindness and compassion” dalai lama


LISTEN, REALLY LISTEN
“Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk.” Doug Larson
“The ability to be empathic is one of the greatest ways to ease someone else’s pain and suffering. Having empathy is understanding another’s situation from their perspective. It is placing yourself in someone else’s shoes without judging. Empathy and learning about someone else’s worldview is what saves and heals the human race. Empathy is what makes us human. Empathy is evolution and the key to solving relationship conflicts and all the problems in the world. It moves us to a place of courage and compassion.
If you want to change your world and make the world a better place there can be no better starting point than empathy, and to be empathetic you need to listen to what others are saying to you.
In modern times most of us are so distracted by our own busy lives and thoughts that we rarely listen to what other people are saying. We aren’t fully engaged and interrupt or lose concentration far more than we realize. The problem with that is not only does it disrespect or minimize the person we are talking to, and make them feel that what they say doesn’t matter to us or isn’t enough, we might also miss out on discovering or learning something really important.”
“When you talk you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen you may learn something new.”

RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW
“unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness and all forms of non-forgiveness are caused by too much past and not enough presence.” Eckhart Tolle
“All the previous rituals encourage you to appreciate the present moment, because rituals by definition is something that you must perform with awareness, but this one will reinforce all the others by turning the spotlight brightly on mindfulness. The more appreciative you are of the present moment the better your day will be and the more good days you have the more likely you are to attract success and happiness your way. Has been found that mindfulness is a key element of happiness. It can improve physical health in that it relieves stress, lowers blood pressure, reduces pain and improves sleep. Mindfulness can improve wellbeing. It helps you enjoy or savor life more. People who concentrate on the here and now are less likely to feel anxiety about the future or regret about the past and have greater self-esteem and relationships satisfaction.”


3. RETIRE WITH SATISFACTION

SAY GRACE
Why?
“Saying grace not only brings some sacredness to your evening meal but also becomes an act of mindfulness in itself.
Saying grace or doing something similar like lightning a candle is a cue to remind your body to stop running around and slow down to eat and digest a healthy and nutritious meal.
If the conversation sometimes become heated over dinner and perhaps ends in disagreement, you can say “back in the here and now” to remind everyone to let the subject go and simply enjoy eating together.”


WRITE IT DOWN
Why?
“It’s a permanent reminder of your personal history that you can read whenever you want, it’s a way to track your progress in all areas of your life, it increases your likelihood of achieving your future goals cause it gives you an opportunity to see if your daily tasks are in line with your long-term vision and when you write something down it feels more official and helps your mind focus.”


REPEAT AFTER ME
The power of positive affirmations
“I am the architect of my life, my potential for happiness and success is limitless.”
“Your mind is your room. You can close the window but you can also open it. Do you darken your mind or fill it with light?”


SAY THANK YOU
“Gratitude opens to the door to the power, the wisdom, the creativity of the universe. You open the door through gratitude.”
“It’s not happiness that brings us gratitude. It’s gratitude that brings us happiness.”


/// How to turn them all into habits? ///

1. Start with an incredibly small habit.
Make it so easy you can't say no. —Leo Babauta
2. Increase your habit in very small ways.
4. When you slip, get back on track quickly.
5. Be patient. Stick to a pace you can sustain.

[Judi Mckay · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. The 21 Rituals, which I am going to write out and laminate and carry round with me are all quick and easy to do but I know will add to the enjoyment, enrichment and/or fulfillment of my days. If you only read one self help book, make it this one. It stands out because it is simple, it explains each ritual in detail, and gives hints on how to do it, when to do it and why you should be doing it and the benefits you will gain. All the rituals she suggests you try for 21 days and if they don't work for you, stop them.
this was a library borrow which was annoying in that I wanted to highlight and put notes on most of the pages.

[Latina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome book that reminds us of what's really important in life.

[CevaUnaVolta · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stelle.

Non posso vantare una vasta conoscenza del genere di libro "crescita personale/spirituale", ma non mi ha pienamente soddisfatta.
La struttura dei capitoli è fedele per tutto il libro, ma è squilibrata. L'introduzione è troppo lunga e soprattutto ripetitiva. La ripetitività si trova anche nella terza parte del libro e man mano che si procede con la lettura, sembra che si vada a perdere coerenza e consistenza nei rituali proposti, rischiando di risultare scontati e banali. Inoltre, avendo un'intro che è quasi 1/5 del libro, ci si aspetta un epilogo sì breve, ma non un insieme di citazioni. Queste sono apprezzabili nel testo e inframmezzano la narrazione, risultando spesso più comunicative della prosa stessa.
Non lo consiglio come libro per un primo approccio al genere, tanto meno ad una persona che vuole davvero cambiare la sua vita. È più adatto a qualcuno che ha già intrapreso il cammino (un neofita che si trova a dover fotografare le liste di fine capitolo, rischia di uscire dai 21 giorni con più ansia, stress e insicurezza di quando ha cominciato).
E.

[Bieyka · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Cambios positivos que necesitas para transformar tu vida. Dale un propósito y un significado a tus días y a tu vida. Enfoque poderoso y determinado. Ver el mundo con una nueva perspectiva. Acciones llenas de significado. Se una fuente de energía para ti mismo. Evitar que los sentimientos negativos y las decepciones del pasado determinen tu presente. Enriqueciendo el cuerpo, la mente y el alma. Herramientas para abrirte a una versión extensa de ti mismo sin paradigmas. Vive tu sueño. Crea tu vida. Vive con intención. Soñar, visualizar, planear, creer y actuar. Aspiro a ser perfectamente imperfecta. Cuando eres dueño de tu respiración, nadie te puede robar la paz. Porque la gente con una autoestima alta se enfoca en crecer, en mejorar y avanzar".

[Boktyckaren Carita]

Att använda naturen för att få kraft och harmoni i sitt liv känns både spännande och enkelt. Här finns många gamla självklarheter som vi i vårt moderna liv har glömt bort. Denna bok fokuserar på vad vetenskapen säger, blandat med vittnesmål i anekdotiska berättelser.
📚
Boken ger dig praktiska instruktioner om hur ritualerna (eller jag tycker ritualer låter så högtravat, skulle hellre säga övningar) utförs.
Jag har bestämt mig för att i sommar fokusera på jordning. Att ha direktkontakt med jorden sägs vara lugnande, avstressande, kunna balansera hormoner, sänka blodtrycket och förbättra koncentrationen.
📚
En bok som får ligga framme som en påminnelse!
#21ritualer @theresa_cheung_author @livsenerginu #caritasläsning2021 #33

[Michael David · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are definitely good ideas here. Don't be fooled by thinking they are overly simple, as some are rather uncomfortable but really do lead to surprising results. This book is rather repetitive, however, and often talks about aiming for achievement and success, which weren't really my goals. Incorporating all 21 rituals at once has been difficult, so I don't recommend aiming for that. I imagine that I will tweak a lot from here long term, but this gets your started if you're wanting to incorporate more rituals into daily life. Just don't feel too bad for skimming through the chapters.

[Michelle G. · Rating 1 out of 5]

Meh. I have heard or read about every single one of these rituals before in some form or another, so this got old for me really quickly. It told me nothing new or of substance, and it's also very repetitive, so it's not even engaging. For someone taking their first steps into self-improvement, these basic guidelines to adopt good habits may be useful, but it's nothing you couldn't find with a quick Google search. Overall and IMO, there are much better resources out there.

[Karla · Rating 4 out of 5]

While I understand the concept, I don't love the pitch of "do all these 21 things every single day for 21 days without fail or else start over and try again". I think the individual rituals are mostly OK and a good read, and I do like the differentiation of habits versus rituals. As someone with AuDHD, habits are very hard, but the rephrasing helps to see that in a different light.

[J Crossley · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book begins by talking about the benefits of rituals. Then it goes in to the twenty-one rituals the author says will make your life better. There are seven rituals each for the morning, the daytime, and the evening.

[Maria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Το βιβλίο έχει ωραία τελετουργικά και επεξηγήσεις για το κάθε ένα, όμως πιστεύω πως είναι δύσκολο να εφαρμοστούν σε μία ημέρα. Δεν αντιλέγω ότι όντως μπορεί να έχουν θετική επίδραση, όμως προσωπικά δεν θα τα χρησιμοποιήσω όλα.

[Hemant Sawant · Rating 5 out of 5]

great book... one of the very few books that I have come back to read twice, among the various self help books that I tried over the last couple years... very short and to the point and has great actionable steps to take and implement...

[Melanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Wasn't as useful as I had hoped

I had thought going in that the rituals would be unique and separate but it's more of 21 rituals to do every single day. Wasn't for me, but maybe it can be for you

[Peta · Rating 3 out of 5]

A food introductory book for ways to improve your life. As someone who is interested in positivity and manifestation to improve your life I didn't find anything new or ground breaking in this book. Still a nice read though.

[Heli Künnapas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kokkuvõtlikult selline mõnus ja lihtne lugemine. Enesearenguteel alustamiseks hea, kuid samas hea meeldetuletus ka neile, kes endaga juba pikemat aega tegelenud.

Pikemalt kirjutan blogis: https://midaheliluges.blogspot.com/20...

[Pía López Copetti · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting collection of rituals to look at life with a more down-to-earth mindset, easy to apply them in your day to day life.

[Isabel Maramba · Rating 4 out of 5]

There are too many rituals to keep track of daily. It can be trimmed down allot. It was kinda fun doing some of the rituals. I did feel the benefits. It’s definitely a work in progress.

[Cathy · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some good ideas, although I didn't particularly like the writing style.

[Noreen Heiss · Rating 5 out of 5]

Full of wisdom

[Rolf Schmitz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super erklärt, einfach anwendbar.

[Every · Rating 3 out of 5]

Molto utile sicuramente. Però prima di dare una vera recensione farò i 21 rituali per 21.poi ne riparleremo..

[Ely Gocce di Rugiada · Rating 3 out of 5]

Se qualcuno riesce a fare tutti i 21 rituali in una giornata,lo ammiro.Io trovo impossibile.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm only at day 2 of the 21 day challenge and can already see this book is as life changing as it promises. A must read.