Nematoma mergaitė

by Mariel Hemingway

„Nematoma mergaitė“ – tai jaudinantis, prikaustantis dėmesį dienoraštis, kurį Mariel Hemingway parašė, norėdama pasidalyti su bendraamžiais savo išgyvenimais, sielvartu ir kaip juos įveikė. Aktorė prisimena sudėtingą vaikystę ir paauglystę, augant garsioje šeimoje, kurią persekiojo depresija, alkoholizmas, psichinė liga ir net savižudybė.

„Mano šeima buvo labai kūrybinga ir talentinga, bet turėjo daug tamsių pusių."

Ji gimė, praėjus keliems mėnesiams po to, kai nusišovė jos senelis Ernestas Hemingvėjus. Visą vaikystę ji stengėsi išvengti psichinės negalios, kuri kamavo kelias jos šeimos kartas. Abu tėvai gėrė, sesuo Margo sirgo depresija, senelis ir dar keturi šeimos nariai nusižudė, vyriausia sesuo Mafit kentėjo nuo šizofrenijos. Mariel, jauniausia šeimoje, nori būti sveika.

Skaitydami šį dienoraštį, paaugliai, susiduriantys su panašiais sunkumais, suvoks, kad yra šviesa tunelio gale. Nors tema sudėtinga, autorė rašo atvirai, tiesiai, šviesiai, jos pasakojimas malonus. Stilių pagyvina piešinukai. Knyga parodo, kaip vaikas vertina pasaulį. Atrodo, kad ji niekada nepyksta dėl savo lemties, nors jaučiasi negraži, keista ir nori būti nematoma. Ji kaip nematoma stebėtoja namuose, mokykloje jai sunku pritapti. Kiekvienas skyrelis baigiasi apibendrinimu „Apie ką reikia pagalvoti". Čia atsiskleidžia mergaitės pastabumas, įžvalgumas ir emocijos. Savo sumanumu jis padės susivokti panašių sunkumų išgyvenantiems bendraamžiams.

Knyga priklausys „Gelmių" leidyklos serijai jaunimui „Paribio istorijos". Šių knygų veikėjai iš tiesų yra atsidūrę ties riba: gyvenimo ir mirties, vienatvės ir bendrystės, ligos ir išgijimo, meilės ir atstūmimo, pasmerkimo ir atleidimo, nuopuolio ir pakilimo naujam gyvenimui. Riba tarp gėrio ir blogio, šviesos ir tamsos yra tokia slidi, tokia perregima ir vos juntama, kad turi labai gerai įsižiūrėti ir visada atsiminti, jog per gyvenimą reikia žengti labai atsargiai – nesužeidžiant, nepaminant kito, ištiesiant ranką ir patiesiant petį, nes niekada nežinai, kada pats balansuosi ant savosios bedugnės krašto.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Psychology

96 pages, Paperback

First published April 7, 2015

About the author

Mariel Hemingway (born Mariel Hadley Hemingway November 22, 1961) is an American actress and author. She began acting at age 16 in a breakout role in Lipstick and is best known for her roles in Manhattan (for which she received an Oscar nomination), Star 80, and Superman IV: The Quest for Peace.

She has starred in and co-produced videos about yoga and holistic living. She published a memoir in 2002.

Hemingway was born in Mill Valley, California, the third daughter of Byra Louise (née Whittlesey) Hemingway and Jack Hemingway, a writer. Her sisters are Joan Hemingway (born 1950) and Margaux Hemingway (born 1954). Margaux, who became an actress and model, died of a barbiturate overdose in 1996 at age 42.

Her paternal grandparents were Hadley Richardson and Nobel Prize-laureate novelist Ernest Hemingway (who committed suicide several months before she was born). She was named after the Cuban port of Mariel—her father and grandfather visited the village regularly to go fishing. Her middle name is from her paternal grandmother.

Hemingway's most famous acting role was in Woody Allen's Manhattan (1979), a romantic comedy in which she plays Tracy, a high school student and Allen's lover. Just 16 during filming (within the film she is said to be 17), she was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress.

Reviews

[Isabel · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wholeheartedly admire what Mariel Hemingway is trying to do with this book. The list of resources and her first hand accounts of dealing with a family filled with alcohol abuse, substance abuse, suicidal tendencies and just plain dysfunction (violence at the hands of her sister) were scary, confusing things for a child to endure. Still, the book itself seemed condescending. The vocabulary is basic (how many times can you use the word sad on one page?). Her list of things to think about occasionally worked, but often seemed like Deep Thoughts for a first grader. I guess the biggest problem with this book is that it seemed to be for a target audience of a first or second grader.

It's a great idea and the illustrations gave a well needed break from some hard concepts, but I think a slightly more mature discussion of the material would have been nice. At no time does Hemingway seem angry or disappointed in the life she was given. She just endured and put a good face on things. Somehow, that didn't feel entirely honest and the journal-Iike format made me expect a more candid approach. This carefulness somehow discredited Hemingway's effort, implying that the openness she encourages in other kids going through hard times needs to be cleaned up before being shared.

[Iwik Pásková · Rating 5 out of 5]

Musím říci, že tato kniha mě oslovila hned od samého začátku. Našla jsem v ní spoustu odpovědí na životní otázky, které trápí většinu populace. Knihu mohu vřele doporučit. Při jejím čtení zažijete spoustu emocí, jež vám jiná kniha na tak malém prostoru zaručeně nepřinese.

[Hanka · Rating 4 out of 5]

Leckterá dívka někdy zatoužila stát se neviditelnou. Mariel Hemingway, vnučce uznávaného amerického spisovatele Ernesta Hemingwaye, se to dařilo téměř celé dětství. Bývala by si byla přála, aby její neviditelnost byla pouhou dětskou hrou, na kterou bude jednou s úsměvem vzpomínat. Neviditelná dívka je zpověď děvčete, kterému bylo ukradeno dětství. Které muselo dospět příliš brzo a bylo obklopeno událostmi, jimž nemohlo rozumět. I přesto se malá Mariel nevzdává svého práva na bezstarostnost. Situace, plynoucí z duševního konfliktu dítěte, které se snaží být dítětem a zároveň žije v rodině, kde matka přespříliš popíjí, jedna sestra bere drogy a ta druhá trpí bulimií, působí hořko-sladce. Autobiografické dílo o dětství, prožitém v chaotickém rodinném prostředí, je určeno především dětskému čtenáři, který jeho poselství ocení nejvíce.

„Chvilka pro víno: ten divný výmysl, se kterým naši přišli po tátově infarktu. Chvilka na víno nastává kdykoli po páté hodině, ale klidně může přijít i o hodinku dřív. Všichni jsou přesvědčeni, že když budou pít červené víno, budou zdraví a šťastní. Ne tak rychle, rodinko! Já totiž mezi obvyklým pitím a chvilkou na víno nevidím vůbec žádný rozdíl. Probíhá to asi takhle: z velké lahve vína se nalije sklenička každému kromě mě – což považuji za nespravedlivé. Přidá se několik kostek ledu a voila – jak by řekl táta francouzsky – máme tu sklenku výborného, lehce naředěného vína. Už po čtyřech pěti velkých skleničkách se však nikdo nechová příliš hezky.“ (str. 35-36)

Vypravěčkou knihy je malá Mariel, její příběh sledujeme od narození až po základní školu. Postupně jsme seznámeni s poměry v její rodině, která je společensky vážená a materiálně zabezpečená, vzájemné vztahy jsou ale poznamenány závislostmi a duševními problémy. Naše hrdinka, se svým dětským pohledem na svět, nikoho nesoudí, zato všechny bezmezně miluje. Snaží se porozumět světu dospělých, což se jí pochopitelně nedaří. Svou upřímností a čistotou dospělého čtenáře dojme i zaskočí.

Neviditelnou se Mariel snaží stát, když se její alkoholem posilnění rodiče hádají, když se jí ve škole posmívají, když neví, co má odpovědět na otázku. Hlavně na sebe neupozorňovat, nedělat problémy a být hodnou holčičkou. Za cenu samoty. Mariel nevěděla, že si může říci o pomoc. Nevěděla ani kdo by jí pomocnou ruku mohl nabídnout.

Jako vystudovaná sociální pracovnice si neodpustím poznámku, že tuto knihu považuji za vhodný edukační materiál o vnitřním světě dítěte z problematické rodiny. Ráda bych knihu viděla v nabídkách krizových center pro rodinu, nízkoprahových klubů pro děti a mládež, či jiných zařízeních, pracujících s rodinou v krizi. Upřímná výpověď autorky by mohla nejednomu dítěti z nefunkční rodiny poskytnout útěchu. Příloha nabízí také seznam kontaktů, kam se i dítě může obrátit v případě nepříznivé rodinné situace.

http://www.hanka.mablog.eu/2016/08/31...

[Amy Allgeier · Rating 1 out of 5]

I get the idea of this memoir. I really do. However, I couldn't stand the voice of the character. I felt that she made it "too young". I get that she was writing from each time period (which had her starting around 2 years old up until high school), but I don't think teens will like this style of writing...they'll find it too "babying" (at least in my opinion).

I do like, however, the important information and resources in the back about drug/alcohol abuse, depression, etc. It's a great resource for that, but I just feel it could have been written in a different style to "grab" readers.

[Aja · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was ambitious and I got the point she was trying to make overall. But it would have been helpful if she had given more examples of how behavior of people around her changed with their drinking. I think it could be a great resource for teens who have parents with substance abuse problems but it needed to dive a little bit deeper.

[Rylee Jarosz · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was obviously meant for a younger reader. It was still enjoyable and incredibly quick. I loved the message, but some of the writing was unclear. I never really knew how old the main character was due to each chapter jumping around a lot. Once again, the book could have been much longer with more detail. This is also me being extra critical due to the writing being meant for someone younger.

[Sally Kruger]

Looking for more non-fiction, particularly personal stories, I came across this new release. Mariel Hemingway may be a bit of an unknown for current teen readers, but her story is a compelling one that speaks across generations.

INVISIBLE GIRL documents Hemingway's struggle to survive in a dysfunctional family famous enough to be hit by the occasional spotlight. Both parents are alcoholics dealing with a rocky relationship for most of their married life. Two older siblings are dealing with their own emotional and mental health issues. That leaves Mariel to quietly fend for herself.

Lonely for much of her young life, she struggled in school, not only with the subject matter, but also with fitting in and making long-lasting friendships. Feeling unattractive and awkward, Mariel escaped into to make believe games and daydreams. It seemed that just when things might begin to fall into place, her world was upended, forcing her to begin again.

Written in an easy, flowing style, INVISIBLE GIRL offers teens a peek into the not-so-perfect life of a woman who not only survived her teenage years, but went on to become quite accomplished. I know I will have readers interested in this one.

[Becky Carleton · Rating 3 out of 5]

From the book:

"No matter what your problem is, it isn't only your problem. Families have troubles because they are made up of people, and people are complicated...Kids are sometimes the most observant members of families because they aren't loaded down with all the baggage that comes with being an adult. They might not have the experience and wisdom to know how to fix problems, but they're fully aware of them..."

Mariel Hemingway, granddaughter of literary giant Ernest Hemingway, recounts in diary-like detail what it's like to grow up in a famously dysfunctional family. Older teens might find the narrator, who still calls her parents "Mommy" and "Daddy" when she's fourteen, too babyish. Highly recommended for tweens and young teens who struggle with eating disorders, OCD, alcoholic and drug addicted family members, and parents who have a serious illness such as cancer. Despite the depressing topics, this evocative memoir is full of hope, empowering young people to talk openly about their struggles and to take charge of their own mental health journey, breaking free from the cycle of family dysfunction.

[Karol · Rating 4 out of 5]

Girls living in a dysfunctional family can relate to young Mariel as she deals with her parents drinking and fighting and her sisters issues as well as her own personal growth.
Mental illness no matter how big or small can be confusing for anyone. Our response as children to our parents and sibling behaviors say something about who we are and the influence we receive from inside the home and the outside world.
I can relate to developing OCD tendencies, viewing my families issues by hiding inside myself. When I was invisible I was safe.
The "Where to go for help" chapter gives readers valuable resources to reach out for assistance.

[Meaghan Steeves · Rating 4 out of 5]

Aside from the confusion as to the intended audience (I found this in the adult movie biography section yet the voice seemed to be addressing children), I thought the writing very beautiful. I loved hearing the story of her childhood as though she were telling it as it's happening. It was whimsical, and a lot of it reminded me of my own childhood. I was unable to identify with everything Mariel described yet I really related to her during certain parts. I definitely want to read her other autobiography detailing her adult life, as I find her a really fascinating and compelling person.

[Ml Lalonde · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked up this book by Mariel Hemingway at the Hemingway House in Key West and read it on one plane journey. This would be a good book to give to teens who might be living with depressed/addicted parents, since Mariel gives voice to the experience of being a child in a family with lots of demons. You can't help but love and cheer for her.

[Donna · Rating 2 out of 5]

While I appreciate the motivation for this book, the voice was too young for the intended audience. Also, the harshness of her home life was merely hinted at. The resources and commentary included after are great and important. I felt, though, like this part was the first time readers got a full idea of the kinds of things going on in her life.

[Kathleen Saldana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Moving

I enjoyed this book, though it's written for young people, I think adults can benefit from it because they can see how a young person interprets the world. Everything parents do impacts their child and many of us realize it too late.

[Kristin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really seemed to delve into surviving in a dysfunction family...

[Jemma (Aussie BookWorm) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Feeling a bit dissapointed and deflated honestly. Not what I expected at all. Full review: http://aussiebookworm.weebly.com/hemi...

[Ashley · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a little weird :(

[calico Rosenberg · Rating 2 out of 5]

the writing is sooo unadvanced, it was painful and i had to quit near the end, despite how short it was

[A. P. Zacharová · Rating 3 out of 5]

http://welikebooksforever.blogspot.sk...

[Lisa Mcbroom · Rating 4 out of 5]

Actress Mariel Hemingway, grandaughter of writer Ernest Hemingway, writes about growing up in a family of alcholism and depression and how she overcame the "Hemingway" Curse.

[Kaci · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good book for younger children, dealing with family struggles and mental illness.

[♏ Gina☽ · Rating 4 out of 5]

The fact that Mariel Hemingway survived is a miracle. She didn't survive unscathed, but she survived.

The world has long known of the Hemingway name. The book is her viewpoint of her life as a teen, surrounded by mentally ill, suicidal, alcoholic, and otherwise less-than-optimal adult role models. She lays in bed and listens to things being thrown and shattering, people screaming, and who knows what else is going on elsewhere in the house. She prays it's all a bad dream, but it's not. It's her life.

Mariel, the youngest child in her family, was born not long after her very famous grandfather Ernest committed suicide. Both parents were raving alcoholics. Her older sister Margeaux suffers from debilitating depression. Another sister, Muffet, is diagnosed with schizophrenia. Four other members of her family commit suicide. Eventually, cancer is added to the mix when her mother becomes very ill.

Mariel herself succomed to some mental health issues, eventually developing OCD and eating disorders.

In this book, an extremely brave Mariel shares her story in the hope that another child or teenager facing similar problems will know there is hope and there is light at the end of the tunnel. If you know of a youngster in this type of situation, this would be an excellent read. I applaud her for her candid revelations, and for bringing to light the often kept in the dark world of mental illness and addictions.

[Emilė · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really admire what the author is trying to say with this book. And I also sort of appreciate how she wrote about her harsh childhood, dysfunctional family, mental heath issues and so on- all very serious topics were delivered in such a way that wasn't weighing down to read about. However at times I felt like the writing was almost too light-hearted to the point where those problems seemed reduced and downgraded and that made it feel less raw.

[Phyllis · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good book for an elementary school reader with mental illness/alcoholism/domestic violence/suicide in their family. Mariel writes in the voice of a very young girl. I think preteens could handle a more detailed and adult-sounding narrative, but it does the job in helping children realize they are not alone and gives them resources at the back of the book explaining each organization and includes telephone numbers. It's a start anyway so I say go Mariel!

[Caroline Weiss · Rating 4 out of 5]

My heart broke for Mariel while reading this, I can’t imagine such pain. Sometimes it’s harder to hear stories like this from someone you’ll never know personally, because you’re not able to express your care and the pain and empathy you feel. As much as you can tell when someone is a celebrity, it seems like Mariel has healed and is doing well, and that’s reassuring💞

[Natalia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book because it was really fun to read. There were some sad, funny, and ok parts in this book but overall i really enjoyed it

[Sophia Isles · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's quite a childish book and it is easy to understand. It's interesting to see how she handled life.

[Aš ir knyga · Rating 4 out of 5]

*Kai vienas iš tavo tėvų serga, turi sakyti "taip", net kai nesi tikras, ką tas "taip" reiškia.*

[Kaitlynne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this book and getting to learn about Mariel on a more personal level. She is such an interesting, inspiring, and motivational kind of person.

[Lisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hemingway’s granddaughter tells about her childhood in this sweet memoir. She doesn’t make excuses- she tells it like it is. This is a great book for a young teenage girl who may be struggling to figure out who she is. I also love that at the end she provides tons of resources for girls.