The End of My Career

by Martha Grover

In her new memoir, Martha Grover goes undercover. Whether cleaning houses or looking for love, she peels back the surfaces of ordinary moments and reveals a life both hilarious and traumatic. The End of My Career sees Grover living with her parents again as she enters her late thirties, reconciling the pleasures and perils of being female, chronically ill, and subsisting on menial labor at the edge of an increasingly unaffordable city. Desperate for stable work, she gets hired as a state-sanctioned private investigator looking into shady workers’ comp claims—even while she herself fights in court for her own disability settlement. Angry and heartbroken, brimming with the outrageous contradictions of the modern world, The End of My Career embodies the comic nightmare of our times.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Essays, Contemporary, Disability

240 pages, Paperback

Published July 28, 2016

About the author

Martha Grover is an author, poet, and artist living in Corbett, Oregon. She is the author of One More for the People, The End of My Career (Perfect Day Publishing) and Sorry I Was Gone, a lyric memoir. The End of My Career was a finalist for the Oregon Book Awards in creative nonfiction in 2017. Her work has also appeared in numerous journals. She has been publishing her zine, Somnambulist, since 2003.
Check out more of my work at: patreon.com/marthagrover

Reviews

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love love loved this. Such a sharp voice. Also the only thing that's ever made me feel slightly less ashamed to be from Gresham.

[PhattandyPDX · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Everyone knows what 82nd Ave. is and everyone knows what it means. It’s where you go to get hookers and drugs. It’s where Portlandia ends and Portland begins.”

[Hans Otterson]

Last night I tweeted at Martha Grover, the author. Here is what I said: "I read most of The End of My Career today (saved the last story for tomorrow). I feel awful and sad but also less alone."

It's probably unfair to pin too much of the "awful and sad" on Ms. Grover's stories; they are not particularly dark or gut-wrenching. All the same, every story is a struggle that feels just a little too real to be comfortable. Maybe it's because they're autobiographical. Maybe it's because they're set in Portland and I relate too strongly with the dating issues and the housing issues. Maybe it's that there are so many bad men in the stories, and the narrative of bad men is beginning to wear me down (confidential to women: I know the bad men wear you down more than the narrative wears me down (confidential to women & everyone: disclaimers like that are necessary to head off suspicion that I'm not some shitbag MRA)). Probably it's because life never feels not rough and the slices of her life that Ms. Grover puts on display here illustrate that in a voice that is completely unhesitating.

Hence, the "less alone." There's no glamour or pomp here. Reading this doesn't make me jealous of Martha (though I probably should be, considering her ability to write essentially perfect stories), or make me want to be best friends with her, or date her, or whatever. It just makes me feel like there is another human out there who sometimes feels the way I do, who despite different life experience can put something I thought only existed in my chest into words (which makes it actually real).

That last story I saved for today is also the best. If you've never lived in Portland you can skip this paragraph. To my fellow inhabitants of Bridge/Stump/Rose/Town/City, I submit as one of the best story titles of all time, "Age is Just a Number, Gresham is Just a State of Mind." The end of this story makes me feel something that the whole book works to earn: Fuck, I am a person.

[Calvin Fontaine · Rating 4 out of 5]

An entertaining and quick read. Thanks to Danielle for putting this in my hands and telling me to read it!

I really enjoyed the vignette format. I think my favorite chapter was “The Five Stages.” Grover’s humor and observations were blunt and on point. She required little flourish for a book filled with detail and emotion. Grover shares the ebbs and flows of her life with utmost honesty, and it helped remind me of the many paths of life people proudly march or awkwardly stumble along.

//

“I ask my father to read an article about male entitlement and emotional labor. ‘Can you just tell me what it says?’ he says.” (58)

//

“For years, my body was just something to carry my brain around in. Now, I measure work by its ability to most efficiently extract value from my body and the exertions of my brain. I have to ask myself: If I am moving, how much money do I make per hour from that movement? If the job requires energy, in the end, is the pay worth a portion of the limited time I have left on earth?” (168)

//

“He looked like he wanted me to stop explaining. As if he didn’t want to be reminded that I had a body.” (178)

[Ruth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Each chapter, or vignette, of this memoir, could stand on its own as a short story. The author has a graduate degree in creative writing, yet never seems pretentious or boring. In the background is a lot of exotica: she grew up in a working-class, Evangelical Christian family as one of seven children, yet nobody in her family seems dismayed when she tells them about her sex life. At one point she comments that she grew up in a happy family, and that seems like an accurate insight. She has a terrible chronic illness, and every story is a little bit about that, but mostly she's finding every opportunity to share an amusing observation. Basically I thought, "this is what short fiction in the New Yorker and other high tone journals would be like if fiction writers didn't have to make every narrator unreliable and f-ed up." She just seems like a delightful human being you would enjoy meeting, even though she can write like the kind of writers who seem like they would be unbearable.

[Leif · Rating 4 out of 5]

I didn't know what I was expecting when I took this out from the library - perhaps more of a consistent narrative essay, perhaps more of an academic text. It's neither, and instead presents a series of linked and seemingly chronologically presented autobiographical sketches on work, health, and sex from the perspective of a woman with chronic pain in Portland - and you know what? That is good too! I found Grover's voice consistently reflective and her stories are eminently grounded in lived reality and accessible language. No dependence on abstractions and theoretical platitudes here! From essays on discovering unsavoury potentials inside herself and her sexual partners to reflections on insurance company cruelties and rapidly transforming urban centres, Grover's slivers of autobiographically-sourced stories prove fascinating and informative.

[Aaron Dietz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Compelling autobiographical tales. What draws me in are the characters in them. This book is all about Martha Grover but you learn about her through such great portraits of the people she interacts with. This is my favorite book of hers so far.

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

Martha Grover has been publishing the Somnambulist zine since 2003 and one day about 8 years ago I picked up a copy and this is how I was introduced to her writing which led me to this book.
The End of My Career is a series of slice of life tales taken from Martha Grover’s own life, and it is some of the most honest, brave writing I’ve come across--maybe like a younger female Jonathan Ames (both Grover and Ames shame me with a level of honesty I’m not capable of).

These are 13 true life stories that don’t disappoint. Among these stories:
Funny observations about the man whose house she cleans yet has never met; her story about taking the cruise with all the rich older folks (though she is not rich); tales from working at the cheese shop; plus two longer stories about a harrowing relationship with a man with a dark secret, and the eponymous “The End of My Career” about Martha’s job as a private investigator investigating medical claims (the irony being she has more in common with the people she’s investigating than with the company she works for) and much more!…it really is a terrific book.

Spending time with The End of My Career is like spending time with Martha. She doesn’t hold back, and the book is stronger for it. This was 5 stars pretty much from the first page.

[Krayg · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book is titled The End of My Career, which is ironic considering the author never had one. Instead, she uses her various occupations to tell a collection of beautiful, poignant, acerbic, witty, and insightful short stories.

I read this book in my early twenties, and, at the time, I don't think I understood it. I recently revisited it after being laid off from my last job (in Portland, funny enough) and forced to move back with my parents due to mental health and economic hardship. At 30, the book resonated with me on a deeper level and, in a weird way, made me feel seen and comforted.

Furthermore, it challenged me to look at the world around me and reassess my relationship with my professional life. The book is a glorious, thought-provoking read I recommend to anyone taking a less conventional path through life.

[Diane · Rating 4 out of 5]

Several of the reviews say this book is "funny" or "funny as hell." While Grover has wit and some clever turns of phrase, overall her essays are bleak and I found them depressing. Grover writes with raw honesty and vulnerability about the changing world, dating and love, chronic illness, the modern work environment. My favorite essay was the last one, "Age is Just a Number, Gresham is Just a State of Mind" which brilliantly juxtaposes searching for love with the real estate market. I finished the book hoping Grover is thriving and wanting to hear more from her.

[Brook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious, sad, and real; the End of My Career is a very intimate look at like in Portland as a chronically ill woman with history and a sense of humor. I loved this.

[Stella Nelson · Rating 5 out of 5]

So, so good. Blunt, vulnerable, insightful and funny.

[Debs · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars

I picked this one up because it was an Oregon Book Awards nominee, and I like to read essays when I travel. Unfortunately, I didn't connect with much of it. My favorite essays in the collection were the three towards the end that dealt with being a woman in the world, Portland & the surrounding area, and a sense of place/identity.

[Malachi · Rating 5 out of 5]

So wonderful. Love the reflections on a city in flux seen through different jobs, apartments, and relationships-- "The Two Hundred Dollar Roommate" and "Gresham is a State of Mind" were two of my favorites, but the whole book ruled.

[Kjerstin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Martha Grover is one of my favorite writers! Her story about being a private investigator (in order to help insurance companies avoid worker's comp) while being disabled is worth the read alone.

[Brooklyn Fears · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked this up because of the title alone. I am so happy that I did. Grover tells her story of working odd part-time gigs while dealing with chronic health issues thus having to give up her dreams of full-time writing and art. Told haphazardly and sporadically throughout her twenties up to her mid-thirties, Grover expresses her pain and frustration of everyday mundane life through an incredibly witty and jaded lens.

As someone who put their aspirations on pause and moved back home due to mental health, breakups, and finances, this book resonated heavily. I read this in less than two weeks between back-to-back job rejections and a new health diagnosis. Being an educated creative having to work several part-time service jobs to make a living while seemingly always ill made me feel SEEN.

Grover is self-aware, yet seldom feels sorry for herself when she has every right to.

This book is a must for creatives who have been forced to put their life on hold due to the all-encompassing stress and bullshit that is life.

Also for Oregonians. This book is most definatly for you.

This book felt like a hug followed by a tickle on my side. It felt like a friend who made a funny joke while I was crying. The kind where you wipe your tears while sniffling and half-giggling.

[Edward Champion · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an episodic and often very funny memoir about Martha Grover, quietly ailing from illness, working a string of odd jobs (cleaner, cheese shop, various sketchy agencies) and dating bad men (including a Women's Studies major who proves, like many men who are Women's Studies majors, to be disguising his toxic masculinity) -- largely around Portland, Oregon. Grover is, at times, the West Coast answer to Cynthia Heimel in her unflinching yet breezy honesty. I do think her writing voice could be deepened with the right editor, but I'm not going to kvetch too much. The book is punctuated by little illustrations and I liked the fact that this book ends with a series of personal ads for her friends, which is not a bad idea.

[James · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this collection of personal essays, Grover is incredibly open and honest about the troubles she faces - being female in a sexist world, being physically ill and largely unable to do the physical labor she needs to do for money in a popular, expensive city, having a conscience that precludes her from doing the job she takes investigating insurance claims. There is something intimate and rare in these essays as she doesn't shirk from any uncomfortable detail. Smart writing that transcends the personal to make strong statements about the world we live in.

[Jeff · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank-you, Martha Grover! Memoir is my favorite genre, but I was shaken after two unexpected clunkers. Your “The End of My Career” was the perfect tonic. Your writing is direct, unpretentious and insightful. Much fun, mixed with some sadness, as you share what it’s like encountering gentrification, creepy work, chronic illness, near poverty, misogyny, body image and climate change in and around the quirky city of Portland, OR (with “side trips” to Eugene, Gresham and the Sandy River). Plus bonus sketches! Memoir writing at its best; I urge others to check you out.

[Zach Werbalowsky · Rating 4 out of 5]

Like a 3.5, but I will round up. A solid book filled with funny observations, sharp wit, and dark truths that does not beat around the bush with the authors feeling. It was entirely readable and a couple times felt grating, but I was able to sync up with the voice pretty well, espeically as someone not from portland but living here, they had some choice words which I appreciated and if we only knew how ba everyone had it now.

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't give 5 stats easily, but this book nos than deserves them. Hilarious, poignant, and honest, this book is a beautiful tribute to Portland, Oregon, the Sandy River, and navigating life in our strange and wonderful and mysterious and terrible bodies. 10/10 would recommend to any and everyone!

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Martha kept me laughing and thinking every chapter. She's an insightful writer with timely topics who never gets boring.

[Dessa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a ferocious set of essays about family, illness, housecleaning, dating, writing, and Portland.

[JANE · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny, poignant, unique voice. Addictively readable, and personal.

[Cberke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this in almost one gulp. Sharp, funny, empathetic, and introspective in an aggressively non-irritating way. Now I have to go find her other writing. I think she's going to be a favorite author.

[Michael]

The best there is, the best there was, the best there ever will be. Sorry Bret. Martha Grover is for the people.

[Alison · Rating 4 out of 5]

Learned a bit more about Portland reading about the author's growing up and living here

[Margaret · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this and the way Grover tells her story.

But I liked "One More for the People" better.

[Shemara Fontes · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book broke me and then put my pieces together! What a beautiful peace of art!

[Dave · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've never read anything by Martha Grover that I didn't love and I doubt I ever will.