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MDC: Memoir from a Damaged Civilization: Stories of Punk, Fear, and Redemption
A searing punk memoir by an American original rebelling against conformity, complacency, and conservatism with his iconic band, MDC. From the time Dave Dictor was young, he knew he was a little different than the all-American kids around him. Radicalized politically while in high school, inspired to seize opportunities by his hard-working parents, and intrigued with gender fluidity, Dictor moved to Austin, and connected with local misfits and anti-establishment rock'n'rollers. He began penning songs that influenced American punk rock for decades. MDC always has been in the vanguard of social struggles, confronting homophobia in punk rock during the early 1980s; invading America's heartland at sweltering Rock Against Reagan shows; protesting the Pope's visit to San Francisco in 1987; in 1993 they were the first touring US punk band to reach a volatile Russia after the collapse of the Soviet Union. Dictor's narrative is a raw portrait of an American underground folk-hero who stood on the barricades advocating social justice and spreading punk's promise to a global audience. Part poet, renegade, satirist, and lover, he is an authentic, homegrown character carrying the progressive punk fight into the twenty-first century. Dave Dictor is singer, lyricist, and founding member of legendary American punk band MDC (Millions of Dead Cops). Since 1979, Dictor has toured throughout the world with MDC, releasing more than nine albums with MDC that sold more than 125,000 copies. MDC continues to tour, playing over sixty concerts each year. Dictor's MDC song, "John Wayne Was a Nazi," was featured in the best-selling video game Grand Theft Auto 5 . He appeared in the film American Hardcore and resides in Portland, Oregon.
192 pages, Paperback
Published May 3, 2016
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
November 27, 2017
For a brief time, back in the early 80s from about 1981 to 1984, I had the pleasure of knowing MDC, particularly their bassist Franco and, to a lesser extent, Dave, Al, and Ron, in that order. We often hung out at the beer vats that they came to call home after relocating from Texas, helped carry their equipment, and frequented their shows at places like the Mab, the On Broadway, the Tool & Die, and the Farm. They were all such genuinely nice guys and, since my memories of them can only be described as fond ones, I was naturally compelled to read this as soon as I discovered it. Dave Dictor's memoirs solidly reveal him to be much the same tough/tender honest and vulnerable guy that I remembered from nearly 40 years ago. For those who remember the thrill of first discovering that music that finally, truly spoke to you or of first finding that group of oddball, like-minded kids to belong to, this book will speak to the awkward adolescent latent in all of us. For those who share a past in the Bay Area hardcore scene, this book will reignite sharp memories of those heady early days. And for those who need reassurances that this world can still produce vast underground networks of freedom-loving DIY rebel-artist-activists, this book will inspire and galvanize you.
February 14, 2020
Waaaaaaay to short of a read for a band w/ such history, but aren’t the best hardcore songs the same way? MDC first LP is a game-changer & Dave Dictor is a survivor. Keep on keepin’ on, D!!!
October 14, 2020
Overall the book would be interesting to anyone interested in the behind the scenes history of D.I.Y. punk, with Dave's personal path also being a parallel tale of a subculture, with punk music not merely a fad or fashion, or memorialized like a long gone artifact, but treated as a living breathing movement. This book holds anecdotes and adventures as told through the eyes of a world weary Woody Guthrie-esque citizen soldier who has taken his lumps, learned lessons, and is still inspired to travel the road less traveled, and make a glorious din whenever and wherever he still can.
Dictor's die hard punk rock world is not that of corporate sponsored festivals and action sports soundtracks, but one of more idealistic people powered shows, political benefits and the loosely connected friends and fellow travelers motivated not merely by money, but by a need to help each other network and navigate from town to town, nightclub to VFW Hall. Dave's view from the stage has included thousands at large halls and theaters, but more often than not was maybe a gig put on in a basement, squat or a community center, much like it was back when he first started touring in the early 1980's.
I scored my copy of Dave Dictor's book at a reading he was doing at a local bookstore in Berkeley CA, and the audience there was rapt with attention as Dave regaled us with numerous stories of his 3 decades plus journey through American Hardcore Punk's early days. Dave's tales start even before that era, back in the late 60's, when he was already becoming an iconoclastic teenager. His youth included dealing pot with the aide of a friend's mom, not so tactfully bending gender & norms, and seeking out a vegetarian diet in an age when the only two people he'd heard of who'd existed like that were Hitler & Gandhi. Fortunately for us, Dave abandons his wannabe teen hippie persona behind on Long Island, and eventually hits Austin Texas just as Raul's was starting to put on punk shows, where bands like The Big Boys and The Dicks were also forming, creating a feisty fantastical brand of Texan hardcore unlike the somewhat more macho & mainstream-able flavors available in coastal cities.
In the book, you'll read of Dave leaving his sappy seventies singer songwriter stylings behind to and eventually hit the West Coast full throttle as an angry punk rock pioneer living to the pulsebeat of politically aware subculture, subsisting through squatting and D.I.Y. touring, living out of vans, eating at soup kitchens and deftly dodging police and skinhead violence whenever possible. The book has tales of many shows including an early 90's run behind the Iron Curtain, where border guards and paper work pose problems, and Russian promoters threaten to pull the plug on the tour if the band doesn't come up with $5000 dollars overnight. You'll learn about his heroes, friends and family, and co-conspirators like his long time drummer Al who Dave met as a fellow Monkees fan in the 60's, that eventually leads to both of 'em doing separate stints of hard prison time in the 1990's.
As a memoir, and much like a friend telling a meandering adventure that no one is sure where it ends, the storyline occasionally drifts back and forth through time. Dave has met many thousands of people and magnanimously, many of these names are dropped briefly, while exact event details might get glossed over. Over 30 years of touring means some great stories got left out. While tryin to pack so much in, some chronological anachronisms occasionally appear, such as when he mentions a gig with Husker Du, where Dave relates feeling "like Prince was gonna show up, mount the stage" at First Avenue in Minneapolis "and do a few bars of Purple Rain" even though the MDC show referenced was back in 1982, and Prince was still several years away from creating that iconic cinematic moment.
Enjoy the vicarious rambling ride through these pages, Dave sure has, and one gets the feeling if some medical setbacks hadn't sidelined him momentarily a few years ago so he'd have time to share these tales in print, most of these stories would've gone untold. He had a health crisis and spiritual awakening just before penning the manuscript and feels lucky to be alive to still share his happiness and life story. One criticism I heard of the book is that, despite conflicts and complications in a long career, this MDC book itself is not full of "dirt" and that Dave doesn't talk hella sh/t about anyone. That is just the type of person he he is, and the author courageously, if not naively, still strives to find the positive side to everyone and everything. While allusions are made to occasional nefarious conduct by bit players in the book, Dave moves on rather than dwell on the painful parts. It is perhaps good advice for all of us. As he mentions near the end of the book on page 180, freshly leaving the hospital he almost died in, he tells a cab driver "From now on, only love will come from my mouth and be on my breath".
Dictor's die hard punk rock world is not that of corporate sponsored festivals and action sports soundtracks, but one of more idealistic people powered shows, political benefits and the loosely connected friends and fellow travelers motivated not merely by money, but by a need to help each other network and navigate from town to town, nightclub to VFW Hall. Dave's view from the stage has included thousands at large halls and theaters, but more often than not was maybe a gig put on in a basement, squat or a community center, much like it was back when he first started touring in the early 1980's.
I scored my copy of Dave Dictor's book at a reading he was doing at a local bookstore in Berkeley CA, and the audience there was rapt with attention as Dave regaled us with numerous stories of his 3 decades plus journey through American Hardcore Punk's early days. Dave's tales start even before that era, back in the late 60's, when he was already becoming an iconoclastic teenager. His youth included dealing pot with the aide of a friend's mom, not so tactfully bending gender & norms, and seeking out a vegetarian diet in an age when the only two people he'd heard of who'd existed like that were Hitler & Gandhi. Fortunately for us, Dave abandons his wannabe teen hippie persona behind on Long Island, and eventually hits Austin Texas just as Raul's was starting to put on punk shows, where bands like The Big Boys and The Dicks were also forming, creating a feisty fantastical brand of Texan hardcore unlike the somewhat more macho & mainstream-able flavors available in coastal cities.
In the book, you'll read of Dave leaving his sappy seventies singer songwriter stylings behind to and eventually hit the West Coast full throttle as an angry punk rock pioneer living to the pulsebeat of politically aware subculture, subsisting through squatting and D.I.Y. touring, living out of vans, eating at soup kitchens and deftly dodging police and skinhead violence whenever possible. The book has tales of many shows including an early 90's run behind the Iron Curtain, where border guards and paper work pose problems, and Russian promoters threaten to pull the plug on the tour if the band doesn't come up with $5000 dollars overnight. You'll learn about his heroes, friends and family, and co-conspirators like his long time drummer Al who Dave met as a fellow Monkees fan in the 60's, that eventually leads to both of 'em doing separate stints of hard prison time in the 1990's.
As a memoir, and much like a friend telling a meandering adventure that no one is sure where it ends, the storyline occasionally drifts back and forth through time. Dave has met many thousands of people and magnanimously, many of these names are dropped briefly, while exact event details might get glossed over. Over 30 years of touring means some great stories got left out. While tryin to pack so much in, some chronological anachronisms occasionally appear, such as when he mentions a gig with Husker Du, where Dave relates feeling "like Prince was gonna show up, mount the stage" at First Avenue in Minneapolis "and do a few bars of Purple Rain" even though the MDC show referenced was back in 1982, and Prince was still several years away from creating that iconic cinematic moment.
Enjoy the vicarious rambling ride through these pages, Dave sure has, and one gets the feeling if some medical setbacks hadn't sidelined him momentarily a few years ago so he'd have time to share these tales in print, most of these stories would've gone untold. He had a health crisis and spiritual awakening just before penning the manuscript and feels lucky to be alive to still share his happiness and life story. One criticism I heard of the book is that, despite conflicts and complications in a long career, this MDC book itself is not full of "dirt" and that Dave doesn't talk hella sh/t about anyone. That is just the type of person he he is, and the author courageously, if not naively, still strives to find the positive side to everyone and everything. While allusions are made to occasional nefarious conduct by bit players in the book, Dave moves on rather than dwell on the painful parts. It is perhaps good advice for all of us. As he mentions near the end of the book on page 180, freshly leaving the hospital he almost died in, he tells a cab driver "From now on, only love will come from my mouth and be on my breath".
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 10, 2018
I was a teenager when I first saw MDC play at San Francisco's On Broadway in the early 1980's. Immediately they became one of my favorite bands. This book provoked a lot of memories in me; both good and bad.
Some of the stories that Dave Dictor tells are hilarious; some of them are harrowing. He describes his own long-term struggle with drugs and personal relationships with a great deal of honesty and humor. His accounts of touring with MDC in Europe made my jaw drop in alarmed amazement. The stories about his ambiguous relationships with the Bay Area skins are downright frightening and bizarre!
The insight that sticks with me most from this book is how even when everything else was falling into a state of chaos around him, it was MDC that remained Dictor's center of gravity, always pulling him back, lending shape and purpose to his world. I really admire his life-long, authentic commitment to punk rock.
Some of the stories that Dave Dictor tells are hilarious; some of them are harrowing. He describes his own long-term struggle with drugs and personal relationships with a great deal of honesty and humor. His accounts of touring with MDC in Europe made my jaw drop in alarmed amazement. The stories about his ambiguous relationships with the Bay Area skins are downright frightening and bizarre!
The insight that sticks with me most from this book is how even when everything else was falling into a state of chaos around him, it was MDC that remained Dictor's center of gravity, always pulling him back, lending shape and purpose to his world. I really admire his life-long, authentic commitment to punk rock.
June 30, 2017
Really enjoyable. Now I want to go listen to all of MDC's music. I listened to a couple of songs and they were great! Of course the book and their songs are not for those who are either conservative or easily offended as Dave Dictor is liberal and freely uses profanities. So glad that I ran into a rep from the publisher at a book fest I was at and she told me about this book as I would never have discovered it otherwise. Hope he writes a more complete book down the road as you could tell there was so much more to the stories he related and of course so much that he didn't share too.
June 11, 2023
A page-turning history of much of the punk rock I knew and loved. A must read.
November 24, 2021
This is a very informative look into the mind of the radical left.
M.D.C. was the 1st hardcore band id ever heard of when I was 9 yrs old living in Chicago. A older kid in my neighborhood always wore there klan/cop shirt and tagged M.D.C. on everything in the neighborhood. When I found out it stood for millions of dead cops, I said ive got to hear this, THAT IS THE GREATEST NAME EVER ! So, 35 some years later, I just had to read this book.
The music was ok, I wasnt as impressed with it as id hoped, and later appreciated the music of say Negative Approach, Minor Threat and The Meatmen alot more. (I like the Stains versions of the songs better)
At any rate, the book is a first hand account of the current agenda being promoted by socialists, anti-fa, and left wing radicals in general.
Some of the totally ironic backwards thinking exposed here is as follows.
Dave was basically molested by a drug dealing ex hippie mother of a childhood freind who dressed him in womens panties and engaged in interourse with a young boy, this is related as a fond childhood experiance and promoted as "gender fluidity".
Second, all these bands constantly talk about "abolish government, rock against reagan, etc, while collecting food stamps, welfare checks and crazy checks , so basically the whole movement was actually funded "by" reagan and the "government". No bite the hand that feeds irony there whatsoever. Its kind of funny, I get it, use the system against the system, but still, kind of sad the whole anti government revolution would'nt be possible without "government aid".
I will however give it to Dave, he's a very honest person, most people probably wouldnt be as open about some of these things as he is.
He is also kind of funny in his approach in dealing with nazi skins, sure, he writes all these crazy "kill whitey" songs, but when confronted by them, he usually buys them beer and tries to talk to them, lol, all antifa types should take a lesson from Dave and start buying me beer :)
M.D.C. was the 1st hardcore band id ever heard of when I was 9 yrs old living in Chicago. A older kid in my neighborhood always wore there klan/cop shirt and tagged M.D.C. on everything in the neighborhood. When I found out it stood for millions of dead cops, I said ive got to hear this, THAT IS THE GREATEST NAME EVER ! So, 35 some years later, I just had to read this book.
The music was ok, I wasnt as impressed with it as id hoped, and later appreciated the music of say Negative Approach, Minor Threat and The Meatmen alot more. (I like the Stains versions of the songs better)
At any rate, the book is a first hand account of the current agenda being promoted by socialists, anti-fa, and left wing radicals in general.
Some of the totally ironic backwards thinking exposed here is as follows.
Dave was basically molested by a drug dealing ex hippie mother of a childhood freind who dressed him in womens panties and engaged in interourse with a young boy, this is related as a fond childhood experiance and promoted as "gender fluidity".
Second, all these bands constantly talk about "abolish government, rock against reagan, etc, while collecting food stamps, welfare checks and crazy checks , so basically the whole movement was actually funded "by" reagan and the "government". No bite the hand that feeds irony there whatsoever. Its kind of funny, I get it, use the system against the system, but still, kind of sad the whole anti government revolution would'nt be possible without "government aid".
I will however give it to Dave, he's a very honest person, most people probably wouldnt be as open about some of these things as he is.
He is also kind of funny in his approach in dealing with nazi skins, sure, he writes all these crazy "kill whitey" songs, but when confronted by them, he usually buys them beer and tries to talk to them, lol, all antifa types should take a lesson from Dave and start buying me beer :)
January 17, 2018
This is the memoir of Dave Dictor, singer and only permanent member of iconic hardcore band MDC (which stood, mostly, for Millions of Dead Cops). Dave writes honestly and openly about his life, which includes several spells of addiction, and the many different permutations of MDC over the years. He also reflects on the different cities and countries he played in as well as some personal and political issues. Overall, it gives the image of a rather sweet, but not overly interesting man, who seems pretty happy with his progressive credentials, not always based on particularly remarkable behavior or views. Many of his musings will only be interesting to people who have never traveled or read about foreign places -- and I doubt they would read this book.
Among music biographies, this one doesn't rank very high. To be blunt, Dave Dictor is not a writer. Much of the book is just listing of concerts and friends, with minimal information on them. It also really doesn't say too much about the band MDC, or was it always just Dave and some people, and the broader hardcore/punk scene within it operated.
Among music biographies, this one doesn't rank very high. To be blunt, Dave Dictor is not a writer. Much of the book is just listing of concerts and friends, with minimal information on them. It also really doesn't say too much about the band MDC, or was it always just Dave and some people, and the broader hardcore/punk scene within it operated.
May 12, 2018
Decent book about an alternate side of the early punk and hardcore scene, that of the more political maximum rock n roll type band. It was cool to get the perspective of someone coming from that genre. That political activism really seems to have died in the scene today.
My only gripe with the book is it did have some uneccessary filler about things that really don't add much to the story. That and like all books written by dudes from that era, they tend to drone on in the end. I guess that's how it is with some of these guys that are still holding onto a band they started in the early 80s. There isn't really closure, more of a I'll go to till the wheels fall off attitude. There's good and bad in that. On the good side young people get to see these legendary bands. On the bad side, they're truly only seeing a version, and it's definitely not the version one saw in the prime of a bands life.
My only gripe with the book is it did have some uneccessary filler about things that really don't add much to the story. That and like all books written by dudes from that era, they tend to drone on in the end. I guess that's how it is with some of these guys that are still holding onto a band they started in the early 80s. There isn't really closure, more of a I'll go to till the wheels fall off attitude. There's good and bad in that. On the good side young people get to see these legendary bands. On the bad side, they're truly only seeing a version, and it's definitely not the version one saw in the prime of a bands life.
November 28, 2020
When I was around 5 years old (early 90’s) going through my fathers VHS collection me and my older brother came across the MDC/Crucifix set on Target home video and that was the first time I ever seen Dave Dictor and MDC. I was introduced to punk at a young age and it has always been something I held close to my heart. When I heard Dave released a book I was dying to get my hands on it. Once I started it I couldn’t put it down. It’s a roller coaster ride of stories. It’s takes you back to what is was like in the early days of hardcore punk. From the early Austin, Texas scene to the California scene, then basically around the entire globe. Stories of life, addiction, family and friendship. I recommend this book not just to fans of punk music, but to anyone who enjoys a good story. NO WAR, NO KKK, NO FASCIST USA!
July 4, 2018
I first saw MDC at 924 Gilman back in '89. One of the opening bands had some stolen copies of "Dianetics" and threw them out into the crowd. I was lucky enough to grab one and I had the guys from MDC autograph it. I still have it buried in storage somewhere.
29 years later MDC played Gilman again and I was there. I picked up Dave's book and he autographed it after the show. It is a quick, easy read mostly filled with stories about touring, the places and people they played with. All of this gets a little repetitive. That's why it only gets 3 stars. I wanted to hear some personal stories, find out about Dave as a human being. There is a bit of that, but not until the end and by then the book is over. I did enjoy it, but expected more from it.
29 years later MDC played Gilman again and I was there. I picked up Dave's book and he autographed it after the show. It is a quick, easy read mostly filled with stories about touring, the places and people they played with. All of this gets a little repetitive. That's why it only gets 3 stars. I wanted to hear some personal stories, find out about Dave as a human being. There is a bit of that, but not until the end and by then the book is over. I did enjoy it, but expected more from it.
December 17, 2018
An honest look at a life, there might be some swagger but the book is not bathed in it: the ugly side of existence is not left out. A nice complement to the writing might be the photographs or the fliers; historical documents of a subculture.
Despite appearances and the stereotype(s) of being in a punk band, family is incredibly important to Dave. His love for friends and family runs deep and he is thankful throughout for their help when he was at his lowest. This might be the best part of his writing, his description of the contacts he made who would quickly become friends or become family.
Despite appearances and the stereotype(s) of being in a punk band, family is incredibly important to Dave. His love for friends and family runs deep and he is thankful throughout for their help when he was at his lowest. This might be the best part of his writing, his description of the contacts he made who would quickly become friends or become family.
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October 7, 2022Great book about a great punk rock band.
October 30, 2022
2.5 - 2.75 For such a political and socially aware lyricist (and a huge influence on me as teenager), I expected more. I was left wanting. Perhaps a book of interviews would be more revealing?
February 16, 2025
Interesting, engaging, entertaining. Dave Dictor is quite the character with an interesting story to tell.
September 23, 2016
Less a narrative memoir and more a series of recollections, this reads closer to oral history than anything else. Glimpses of early punk from a with-it veteran make this worth the while and I gave it an extra star just because it made me sit and daydream about seeing some of the shows they played...wouldn't that have been great!
Did not know: former Eugenean and friend Brendan played in the 2002-2004 version of MDC.
Did not know: former Eugenean and friend Brendan played in the 2002-2004 version of MDC.
October 23, 2016
MDC is a band that has always floated around me, since they influenced so many bands I loved. I never really knew much about them though. Dave Dictor spins a gentle, kind memoir, which is surprising based on everything else.
July 21, 2016
känns aldrig som att man riktigt kommer honom nära. viktiga saker avhandlas snabbt och jag märker att jag ofta stannar upp o tänker "men sen då?"
August 22, 2016
Fun quick read but it felt like reading the outline and notes of the book he's going to read. More details, more stories...
April 28, 2021
Fast.
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews