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Jack and Lem: John F. Kennedy and Lem Billings: The Untold Story of an Extraordinary Friendship
Jack and Lem explores the enduring friendship between John F. Kennedy and Kirk Lemoyne Billings (aka "Lem"). Jack Kennedy and Lem Billings met at Choate and remained friends until the Dallas gunfire that ended Kennedy's life thirty years later. Featuring interviews with Ben Bradlee, Gore Vidal, Ted Sorenson, friends, family, and many others, award–winning journalist David Pitts begins the story with the early friendship between the men. Though Lem never held an official role in the Kennedy administration, his friendship and insight were much valued, so much so that he had his own room at the White House. This is the story of Jack and Lem and the climate for gays during he Kennedy era — the story of a great friendship that grew and survived against the odds.
384 pages, Hardcover
First published April 25, 2007
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 31 reviews
August 28, 2008
What a disappointment this book was. It's got a fantastic angle - a look at JFK's closest and longest-lasting friendship, with one of his prep school buddies, Lem Billings, who just happens to be gay. Surely a subject this rich and unexamined should be rewarding, yes?
No.
Why? Let me count the ways:
*Over and over, people say they understand why Lem would want to stay friends with JFK, but that they couldn't see what JFK got out of Lem's friendship. Over and over, the author says this isn't true - but going by the evidence he presents, I find myself reaching the same conclusion as the other people. It would seem to speak more to JFK's character than Lem's that he kept Lem around.
*The first part of the book has many letters and telegrams the two exchanged for reference - so much so that it tends to fall back on just quoting them at length, using them less for illustration than narration.
*When the letter-writing runs out, around the time JFK enters politics, there's less research material for the author, and the book starts to feel padded with the usual JFK bio info - dalliances, Bay of Pigs, Cuban missiles, etc. It sends the book straying away from its thesis.
*There's sloppy editing. Lines are quoted and then quoted again later - in one jaw-dropping case, five pages later - as though it was being newly presented.
*Several times the lack of researchable material leads the author to say things like, "We can only imagine how Lem must have felt as he..." If I wanted to use my imagination, I wouldn't be in the biography section.
There were some stories in here that were new to me, and I appreciated seeing a side of JFK that doesn't show up much in the biographies about him. But oh, what this book could have been...
No.
Why? Let me count the ways:
*Over and over, people say they understand why Lem would want to stay friends with JFK, but that they couldn't see what JFK got out of Lem's friendship. Over and over, the author says this isn't true - but going by the evidence he presents, I find myself reaching the same conclusion as the other people. It would seem to speak more to JFK's character than Lem's that he kept Lem around.
*The first part of the book has many letters and telegrams the two exchanged for reference - so much so that it tends to fall back on just quoting them at length, using them less for illustration than narration.
*When the letter-writing runs out, around the time JFK enters politics, there's less research material for the author, and the book starts to feel padded with the usual JFK bio info - dalliances, Bay of Pigs, Cuban missiles, etc. It sends the book straying away from its thesis.
*There's sloppy editing. Lines are quoted and then quoted again later - in one jaw-dropping case, five pages later - as though it was being newly presented.
*Several times the lack of researchable material leads the author to say things like, "We can only imagine how Lem must have felt as he..." If I wanted to use my imagination, I wouldn't be in the biography section.
There were some stories in here that were new to me, and I appreciated seeing a side of JFK that doesn't show up much in the biographies about him. But oh, what this book could have been...
October 21, 2019
When I heard that there was a biography of John F. Kennedy and his gay best friend, I knew I had to read it. Even though their relationship has been carefully researched, I thought the writing was repetitive and clumsy.
April 13, 2020
I think I enjoyed this book more than any other I've read about the Kennedys, in part because of the intimacy of it because of the closeness of the friendship between Jack Kennedy and Lem Billings, but also more simply because of the characterisation of Lem Billings within. It's a book I know I will return to over and over again. It brought to life for me, not just Lem and not just Jack but also the Kennedy family as a whole and it was absolutely intriguing to see them through the eyes of someone they considered one of them, an honorary Kennedy because of his extraordinary loyalty to a family that history and public perception has not always treated with kindness or respect.
October 11, 2022
exactly what i was hoping for when i picked this to read. i went to such lengths to read this book as i could not get it on my kindle, i had to borrow it on the archive site and i could only read it in tiny font on pdf form on my phone- couldn't even zoom in. but it was worth it!
super interesting, insightful, sometimes funny (i know - wow). i lovedddd the pictures !
i did find some bits repetitive and vague, the parts that the author would, for obvious reasons, not know exactly what was going on in jfk and lem's heads, it'd be like "we can assume ___" or "of course, it wouldn't be unlikely for ____" etc etc. could've just not included that stuff. but it was still good.
super interesting, insightful, sometimes funny (i know - wow). i lovedddd the pictures !
i did find some bits repetitive and vague, the parts that the author would, for obvious reasons, not know exactly what was going on in jfk and lem's heads, it'd be like "we can assume ___" or "of course, it wouldn't be unlikely for ____" etc etc. could've just not included that stuff. but it was still good.
January 7, 2021
The biggest issue I have with this book is how much of it is written from just one perspective.
It is impossible to see the whole picture and therefore understand their friendship if most we got is one side of the story. That is Lem's side. There are plenty of examples thruout the book, showing what he thought, how he felt about Jack, what others saw coming from him, but what do we have coming from Jack? Barely anything, most of which are speculations or shallow general statements with no support from any researched facts, no quotes, no insights. (Not even letters he shows provide much interesting info, despite apparently having access to over 800 of them!) It's as if Jack never said a word about his feelings, nor left much evidence, which seems odd.
After finishing the book I was left with a feeling that author had barely brushed over the surface of this relationship (weird, considering the apparent amount of research he had done). All I can think of is that, for some reason he couldn't find anything, wasn't allowed to, or didn't want to include the other side of the story. That is Jack's side.
It is impossible to see the whole picture and therefore understand their friendship if most we got is one side of the story. That is Lem's side. There are plenty of examples thruout the book, showing what he thought, how he felt about Jack, what others saw coming from him, but what do we have coming from Jack? Barely anything, most of which are speculations or shallow general statements with no support from any researched facts, no quotes, no insights. (Not even letters he shows provide much interesting info, despite apparently having access to over 800 of them!) It's as if Jack never said a word about his feelings, nor left much evidence, which seems odd.
After finishing the book I was left with a feeling that author had barely brushed over the surface of this relationship (weird, considering the apparent amount of research he had done). All I can think of is that, for some reason he couldn't find anything, wasn't allowed to, or didn't want to include the other side of the story. That is Jack's side.
October 4, 2018
The previous reviewers have summed this up well - good angle that was poorly executed.
November 18, 2025
This book provided a very interesting angle on the oft-told Kennedy saga. Giving us the perspective of Kirk Lemoyne "Lem" Billings, JFK's best friend since he was a teenager. It was a solid first book from the author, meticulously well-researched, as the 80+page appendices show.
I wish Goodreads let you give half stars, because I think this could be a 3.5 star book. It is not, however, a four-star book. It could have used another pass or two at the editors desk, with lots of needless repetitions and a little bit of awkwardness towards the end where the author tried to provide a "balanced" view of Lem's post JFK life but ended up with a sort of pendulum of swinging back and forth with how Lem was portrayed.
Still, it's an important piece of both JFK's history and also of LGBTQ+ history, which is crucial now more than ever. I would recommend it for fans of either category.
A few notes:
1. I wonder if the story might have been served better being told by a queer writer. The author seemed to tiptoe around certain subjects. Also painful to read outdated terms like "sexual orientation".
2. The majority of this book is apparently thanks to RFK Jr, who became very close to Lem after RFK Sr's assassination until the end of Lem's life. RFK Jr allowed the author to have unprecedented access to Lem's letters, copies of telegrams, photos, and an oral history that Lem provided. It's a bit strange reading it now in 2025, now that RFK Jr has re-entered the national spotlight.
3. Speaking of RFK Jr. the author often used "Bobby" interchangeably to refer to both the Sr and Jr. Sometimes he uses "young Bobby" to differentiate but not always and I wished he had found a better method.
4. There seemed to be times where the author forgot he was not writing a book solely about JFK, and it felt like references to Lem were shoehorned in.
I wish Goodreads let you give half stars, because I think this could be a 3.5 star book. It is not, however, a four-star book. It could have used another pass or two at the editors desk, with lots of needless repetitions and a little bit of awkwardness towards the end where the author tried to provide a "balanced" view of Lem's post JFK life but ended up with a sort of pendulum of swinging back and forth with how Lem was portrayed.
Still, it's an important piece of both JFK's history and also of LGBTQ+ history, which is crucial now more than ever. I would recommend it for fans of either category.
A few notes:
1. I wonder if the story might have been served better being told by a queer writer. The author seemed to tiptoe around certain subjects. Also painful to read outdated terms like "sexual orientation".
2. The majority of this book is apparently thanks to RFK Jr, who became very close to Lem after RFK Sr's assassination until the end of Lem's life. RFK Jr allowed the author to have unprecedented access to Lem's letters, copies of telegrams, photos, and an oral history that Lem provided. It's a bit strange reading it now in 2025, now that RFK Jr has re-entered the national spotlight.
3. Speaking of RFK Jr. the author often used "Bobby" interchangeably to refer to both the Sr and Jr. Sometimes he uses "young Bobby" to differentiate but not always and I wished he had found a better method.
4. There seemed to be times where the author forgot he was not writing a book solely about JFK, and it felt like references to Lem were shoehorned in.
November 12, 2020
Good story - badly told. Anything about the Kennedys attracts my interest. I must have about 60 books of various angles on John and the family. The specifics of the President's friendship with his best friend from high school to the assassination has never been laid out so am pleased David Pitts and his researcher did the heavy lifting to find critical letters/interviews and so on.
That said though, this book is way to long.. perhaps 100 pages of padding. I have no issue with quoting from letters directly. Primary sources are critical. It is the padding out that annoys throughout. He often repeats the point being made over and over again; and more often that point is the obvious one anyway. The segues are too long winded too, whether it be the history of gay liberation, or Jack's adventures or activities independent of Lem Billings. Once someone is introduced, no need to reintroduce that person and where they sit time and time again. At 200 pages this would have a been a crisp, punchy forensic tale. 310 pages is bordering on waffle Quality of pictures could have been enhanced too. Technology allows that nowadays.
That said though, this book is way to long.. perhaps 100 pages of padding. I have no issue with quoting from letters directly. Primary sources are critical. It is the padding out that annoys throughout. He often repeats the point being made over and over again; and more often that point is the obvious one anyway. The segues are too long winded too, whether it be the history of gay liberation, or Jack's adventures or activities independent of Lem Billings. Once someone is introduced, no need to reintroduce that person and where they sit time and time again. At 200 pages this would have a been a crisp, punchy forensic tale. 310 pages is bordering on waffle Quality of pictures could have been enhanced too. Technology allows that nowadays.
September 5, 2010
A loyal friend to the end- blemishes and all.
February 6, 2016
A well researched portrait of an unknown story - the pictures included were wonderful
June 4, 2019
Kind of sad
Fairly well written, but a lot of the same information is repeated throughout the book. Sadly instead of inspiring, Lem
Comes off as pathetic.
Fairly well written, but a lot of the same information is repeated throughout the book. Sadly instead of inspiring, Lem
Comes off as pathetic.
June 27, 2022
I recently read a novel called “Jackie and Me”, by Louis Bayard. The “Jackie” referred to is Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, but the “Me” wasn’t Jack Kennedy, but, rather, Lemoyne Billings. Lem Billings was a lifelong friend of Kennedy’s, beginning from when they were roommates at Choate, continuing til Kennedy’s assassination in 1963. Billings could best be described as Kennedy’s “wingman”, closest male friend, and boon companion as they moved into adulthood. I’d read a bit about Lem Billings in various Kennedy bios but had never read a bio of him. I found this book, “Jack and Lem”, about Billings by David Pitts and it’s a good follow up to Bayard’s novel.
Kirk Lemoyne Billings was a year older and a school grade ahead of Jack Kennedy. They roomed together at Choate, but then went to different colleges; Lem to. Princeton and Jack to Harvard, after a year at Princeton. Lem was embraced by Joe and Rose Kennedy, as well as by the Kennedy children. He spent most holidays with the Kennedys in Palm Beach or Hyannis. This closeness to Jack lasted until 1963, but he remained devoted to the larger Kennedy family til he died in 1981.
Lem Billings was a gay man at a time when coming out was not often done.
THIS REVIEW IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION. CHECK BACK.
Kirk Lemoyne Billings was a year older and a school grade ahead of Jack Kennedy. They roomed together at Choate, but then went to different colleges; Lem to. Princeton and Jack to Harvard, after a year at Princeton. Lem was embraced by Joe and Rose Kennedy, as well as by the Kennedy children. He spent most holidays with the Kennedys in Palm Beach or Hyannis. This closeness to Jack lasted until 1963, but he remained devoted to the larger Kennedy family til he died in 1981.
Lem Billings was a gay man at a time when coming out was not often done.
THIS REVIEW IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION. CHECK BACK.
April 4, 2025
In this book I saw a more vulnerable side of JFK, and the life of a wonderful man, who devoted his life to his love , his lifelong best friend Lem Billings. Be it pure romantic or platonic, we never know and we do not need to know.
Everyone who is privileged enough to have a true lifelong friendship understands the weight and beauty of the love. Jack and Lem were inseparable soul mates and Lem was essentially part of the family to Jack, given the testimonials of other Kennedys and the incident Jackie expelled her step brother because he cornered Lem.
What is the most precious is not the three decades they shared, but the quality that they truly understood and mutually care for each other, and the ability to share laughters along all thicks and thins, especially the later years of JFK when Lem would be visiting the White House and sharing laughter all the evening.
I share the same resentment with his long time live-in support - Lem seems be a very lovable person who endowed love to everyone around him, and more even his reason for life was taken away from him tragically.
TBC
Everyone who is privileged enough to have a true lifelong friendship understands the weight and beauty of the love. Jack and Lem were inseparable soul mates and Lem was essentially part of the family to Jack, given the testimonials of other Kennedys and the incident Jackie expelled her step brother because he cornered Lem.
What is the most precious is not the three decades they shared, but the quality that they truly understood and mutually care for each other, and the ability to share laughters along all thicks and thins, especially the later years of JFK when Lem would be visiting the White House and sharing laughter all the evening.
I share the same resentment with his long time live-in support - Lem seems be a very lovable person who endowed love to everyone around him, and more even his reason for life was taken away from him tragically.
TBC
November 24, 2025
Many books have been written about JFK but almost nothing has been written about his friend, Lem Billings. Lem was Jack's longtime friend from his boarding school days at Choate. The book explores the friendship as it grew beyond their school days, through the Second World War, Kennedy's political aspirations, assassination, and beyond. Lem Billings devoted his life to Kennedy in ways that almost seem servile. Though the book takes pains to avoid the comparison I can't help but think Billings was a bit of the court jester for the Kennedys. Still, it's a fascinating look at a life lived in the reflected glory of one of America's most prominent families. It is also an important document on how a gay man lived a closeted life before the Gay Rights movements of the late 1960's and 1970's. If you enjoy the history of the Kennedys and want to supplement your knowledge of the family then this is an excellent book to add to your shelf.
May 24, 2021
The writing seemed to improve dramatically after the first dozen pages, or I just warmed up to the style. Good exploration of events, lots of stories and quotes, and some pretty good analysis of the circumstances of the time and their effect on J+L's relationship. Found it somewhat repetitive though.
September 17, 2024
Interesting story but the author says the same thing over and over. He states in the beginning that he couldn’t find much about the topic, and it shows. Particularly interesting are the parts about Bobby Kennedy Jr, wonder what Lem would think about him now.
February 22, 2025
A poignant story of a friendship anyone would wish for. The circumstances and context of this friendship are telling of the indefinable bond between two men in an era when sexual identity was not to be discussed.
November 4, 2020
Great Book
In-depth look at enduring friendship between President Kennedy and Len Billings. So interesting and well written. I couldn’t put the book down.
In-depth look at enduring friendship between President Kennedy and Len Billings. So interesting and well written. I couldn’t put the book down.
January 5, 2022
Slow. Large fixation on JFK, not. Lot of progression on their friendship or fun stories like I had hoped. Lem clings to Jack the entire book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 24, 2022
A different perspective than other JFK biographies, but still making some pretty big assumptions and conclusions
September 22, 2023
a good first book indeed
February 11, 2017
Good read. And a side of a president that most never knew. Life-long friendships are so rare. Lots of good anecdotal stories and personal details - nothing racy that we didn't already know about JFK. The only complaint I had about the book is that the author repeatedly uses the same phrasing about the closeness of their friendship throughout the book. At one point I found myself thinking "Enough already. We get it - they were close friends from boyhood". Other than that, it was a very interesting story and a glimpse into history that very few knew about
March 17, 2015
Pitts' book "Jack and Lem" is an incredible story of friendship...one which has virtually been whitewashed from history, as I had never heard anything about it previously. Jack and Lem were best friends going back to their teenage years and this book details the amazing story of how their lives were intertwined from early on. Their deep devotion to one another was very powerful and Lem had an extraordinary life as a virtual adopted member of the Kennedy family. You rarely see friendships like this one, and I was moved and slightly saddened by this story, real as it was. I actually think this book should be made into a movie told from Lem's point of view. I will not soon forget the story of Jack and Lem, as Pitts does a very good job in its telling.
September 22, 2007
This is a book with an interesting subject matter - the highly unlikely friendship between John Kennedy and Lemoyne Billings - but manages to disappoint. The two men met at Choate in the 30s and were best friends until Kennedy was killed. Their friendship was unlikely because Lem was gay and Kennedy knew it, after a while, but didn't particularly care. But the book can be at times sappy, repetitive and sometimes just plain poorly written. The highlight is when he recounts, very well, the trip the two took across Europe for a few months in the late 30s as war loomed over the continent and Kennedy seemed to awaken to international politics.
January 10, 2017
The relationship between John F. Kennedy. and Lem Billings is a new, refreshing view of the already very well told Camelot story. The fact that Lem is gay and the President's and his family's deep loyalty to him gives a new understanding to a family and political era already deeply memorialized. I found the book itself quite repetative as the material probably is a bit thin. It feels like a very long, stretched out magazine article and that can be a bit mind numbing at times, but it was still a informative and new look at a subject and person that remains a fasination and inspiration.
June 9, 2013
I found this book extremely interesting. I love biographies so reading through the decades of Kennedy was fun once again. Lem certainly was a true friend and devotee. Hard to imagine he kept his sexuality closeted but that was the norm at that time and not discussed. The complete acceptance by the entire Kennedy family was refreshing.
May 3, 2015
Interesting read about the friendship between Lem Billings and Jack Kennedy. The stories of their youth were fascinating and Lem after Jack, but there was a lot of repetition and the focus on Jack made Lem less a character than someone who followed along. The ideas of his gay life were interesting but far too much speculation and not enough fact or stories.
June 16, 2007
The true account of a life-long friendship between President John F. Kennedy and gay close friend and confident LeMoyne "Lem" Billings.
The author had extraordinary access to the letters and papers of JFK and Billings, almost all previously unpublished.
The author had extraordinary access to the letters and papers of JFK and Billings, almost all previously unpublished.
December 18, 2013
That's one way to take a new topic and make it feel old and boring. This book had little in depth research and analysis and focused heavily on surface information. I'm still glad to know about more about JFK and his best friend Lem but so much more could have been said in many better words.
May 11, 2009
All in all, an enjoyable read but a bit repetitive. Some of the author's assertions about Jack and Lem's relationship are really well-rooted in research, while others seem a lot more speculative.
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