People, who don’t believe in research won’t understand, but I read this book, “Did you read this review? A compilation of Amazon’s Funniest Reviews” for research purposes. You have got to know what’s out there, or how else can you make wise decisions to become a better you.
It appears that most people seem to think that this is a funny book, when it is full of smart computations and value judgments. Some of the reviewers even made an effort to provide a complete break-down of how the various items fared in various situations.
For instance, while previously I stuck to the Steve Jobs’ approach on dressing up (or down) (or keeping it simple) it appears I am missing out on a lot of experiences provoked (yep, one could say that) by wearing certain garbs.
‘The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve T’, the ‘Luke Skywalker Ceremonial Jacket’ (complete with ceremonial medal), and the ‘American Flag Pants by Best Form’ appear to be must-haves in anybody's wardrobe. The many pictures of happy people wearing ‘The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve T’ speak volumes.
The same goes for the smart man or woman’s accessories. Since I was born in Austria it is probably embarrassing that I do not own a Wenger 16999 Swiss Army Knife Giant. At $1,305.44 it appears to be a bit pricey but it offers incredible 87 implements that perform 141 functions. From what the reviewers describe, my life could get a lot more exciting if I owned this item. I’d also be prepared for what could happen if I also owned the Zenith Defy Xtreme Tourbillian Men’s Automatic Watch 96-0528-0435-M528 for $112,750.00. Indeed, that price is not a typo, but this is only a men’s watch. Checking Amazon I had to find out that Zenith does not seem to offer an equivalent for women (‘Hillary, we need you!’) Isn’t that once again so typical?
At least Amazon also offers one watch, which would look good on a woman’s wrist, the ‘Montegrappa Chaos Gold and Enamel Automatic Watch’ for $85,959.00. It even comes with free shipping.
Still, it is not mentioned in this book. Because of that I was considering giving this book only 4**** but I realized that ‘Did you read this review?’ is really a very complete book. It also presents reviews for the UFO-02 Detector, the ‘Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China’, the pretty useful ‘Wolf Urine Lure’ (which is currently unavailable) , the ‘Yodeling Pickle’, ‘Bacon Strips Adhesive Bandages”, and dozens more.
As you can see, if you have any problems look no further – ‘Did you read this review?’ is the answer to all. From what I read from reviewer E. Cetin the book “The Secret” is not. Quoting him (and that book)
“The Universe will start to rearrange itself and make it happen for you.”
E.Cetin states that reading ‘The Secret”won’t do that for you.
I have come to the conclusion that the universe might rearrange itself for you if you implicate correctly (!!!) what you have learned from ‘Did you read this review?’.
If everything else fails, you can always resort to buying and eating ‘Canned Unicorn Meat’. It appears some reviewers had concerns regarding the keeping of unicorns. Luckily most of these reviews are from 2012-2013. I am sure in the meantime the sisters at Radiant Farms will have figured out how to keep the unicorns so they can keep pooping marshmallows and rainbows, while roaming as free as possible; that is until they have been turned into ‘Canned Unicorn Meat’ and pass these powers to the consumer.
Lastly, it made me feel good it find out that George Takei is a college of mine. (Ok, he is ranked a bit better than I am, but hey, every company has senior executives.). I had always suffered under the fact that my father did not allow me to watch ‘Star Trek’. Now knowing that George Takei is a colleague of mine I can save myself the expense of buying the ‘Relaxman Relaxation Capsule’ for $49,999.95 and carry on with life.
Gisela Hausmann, author & blogger