Comme si c'était Toi

by Mhairi McFarlane

Au lycée, Anna était grosse, laide et terriblement mal dans sa peau. À trente ans, l’époque où elle était le souffre-douleur de son bahut, et de James en particulier, lui semble déjà loin : elle est belle, elle a un boulot de rêve, et la vie lui sourit. Mais le destin nous réserve parfois d’étranges surprises, et l’homme qui lui a infligé la pire humiliation de sa vie refait surface. Contre toute attente, James est devenu prévenant, drôle, spirituel... et il n’est pas insensible au charme de la ravissante jeune femme avec laquelle il organise une exposition. Il n’a pas reconnu en elle celle dont tout le monde se moquait dix ans plus tôt. Profondément troublée par ces retrouvailles inattendues, Anna est prête à tout pour ne pas retomber amoureuse de son amour de jeunesse...

Genres: Romance, Chick Lit, Contemporary, Fiction, Contemporary Romance, Audiobook, Adult

538 pages, Paperback

First published December 5, 2013

About the author

Mhairi was born in Scotland in 1976 and her unnecessarily confusing name is pronounced Vah-Ree.

After some efforts at journalism, she started writing novels. It’s Not Me, It’s You is her third book. She lives in Nottingham, with a man and a cat.

Reviews

[Mith · Rating 1 out of 5]

What a disappointment.

While I enjoyed the author's previous book, "You had me at hello", this one made me mad enough to throw the book at the wall (if I was reading a physical copy of it, anyway). Positively RIDDEN with clichés!

- Fat girl bullied at high-school? Check.
- Bullies are super-skinny and popular girls with brains smaller than that of an ostrich? Check.
- Girl has a crush on the most popular boy in school? Check.
- Popular boy doesn't giver her time of the day and makes fun of her because she's fat? Check.
- Girl grows up, loses baby fat, gets a makeover and becomes super-hot?! Check check.
- Girl can't find a decent man to date who is sensitive and understanding and caring and not at all a pervert who likes to discuss bedroom antics on the very first date? Check.
- Girl has two (a guy and a girl) super-loyal, super-funny and super-awesome best friends who alone know and love THE REAL HER? Check.
- Girl runs into high-school crush again who suddenly finds her OMGATTRACTIVE because she's all skinny now? @#$&-ing check.
- Girl hates crush because he was an asshole to her while at school but, oh! He's so hot and maybe she still has feelings for him? CHECK.

I could go on but I stopped reading at this point because it became too excruciating and cringe-worthy.

Did not finish.

[Nissa | Of Pens and Pages Book Blog · Rating 4 out of 5]

Crazy how one bad experience can reverberate down the years like that, isn't it?"

A Goodreads friend recommended this to me saying it's a bit of a Pride and Prejudice story, and when I read it, she was right! So, I'm reviewing this book as a Pride and Prejudice retelling. Thanks for recommending this, Olivia!

Anna Alessi is a beautiful, sexy history expert in her thirties who hasn't been successful in finding the one. Online dating isn't going swimmingly, with only polyamorous sexual deviants and obnoxious dates going her way. But that's not what she's worried about. There's a school reunion coming 'round the corner, and she doesn't know if she should face her demons or just bury it until she can't see it.

With a gorgeous Prada number, Anna enters the lion's den. She expected an entrance where everyone would stare at her in awe, but once she's at the reunion party, no one even recognizes her! She's more than ready to quietly leave the place, but she catches the eye of her childhood crush slash life ruiner, James Fraser, and his best friend Laurence.

Not only do they not recognize her, Laurence even tries to hit on her. James, however, does not disappoint. He's still not impressed. And Anna's unfortunate enough to overhear him tell Laurence that she's "not that hot, not my type."



After leaving the reunion party, Anna hopes to never cross paths with anyone from school ever again, but she then discovers that the advertising agency who is in partnership with the project she is handling is the same one James Fraser works for. And guess what? He's also assigned to the project.

She shouldn't be giving any of her bullies the time of day, but instead, she finds herself on a pretend date with the same boy in high school who instigated her biggest humiliation in school. It doesn't end on the pretend date; there's a night out at the theatre with him, his best friend, her sister, and her best friend, a moment at his flat, and at hers. Nothing happened, of course, since James is still technically married to his cheating wife, but the fact that that even happened is something Anna never expected nor dreamt of. She's actually friends with the James Fraser.

I think a lot of people would relate to Anna. Some more than others have been bullied when we were young, and as much as we try to let bygones be bygones, there will always be a remnant of hurt that will latch on to us. I was called ugly and fat because I was a chubby girl with frizzy hair, glasses, and braces. They called me Ugly Betty. They made me feel unwanted. I'm not the kid I was in high school, and although I try to not give a fuck now, there are times when it still hurts. What Anna went through was way worse, and damn it. It hurts.

Anna's family has the Bennet family essence. Her younger sister, Aggy, is a combination of Lydia and Jane. She has Lydia's exuberant personality and Jane's innocence and kindness. She obviously adores Anna, and although sometimes she comes off a bit petulant, she means well. Her mother is a bit silly, and her father is indolent but considers Anna his favorite child.

And the guy's name is JAMES FRASER. Outlander, anyone? James was a piece of shit in school because of what he did to Anna. Sure he's a changed man now, and he and Anna actually got on quite well, but I really wanted redemption for Anna. He didn't even find out Anna was the Aureliana Alessi everyone bullied back in school until much later.

I found myself crying during the confrontation scene. I felt the pain Anna felt when she was in school, and I understood that despite the fact that she's no longer the girl she was, she's still carrying the burden of it. She's now this gorgeous woman with a great job and friends who love her for who she is, but she's still holding on to the pain that one day, everyone at school made her feel unwanted, unloved, and undeserving.

All I needed you to do was nothing to me. But you didn't let me even have that."

Her Mr. Collins comes in the form of Neil, a man she met while online dating. He's a piece of work, I tell you. He's not much in the book, other than the date and a few e-mail exchanges, but he's there.

There are more Wickham-esque characters (read fucking douchebags who need to be buried alive), but they're characters you're not sure are Wickhams or Bingleys (a good-natured bloke who's perpetually happy) or Colonel Fitzwilliam (a charming right hand man).

I enjoyed watching James and Anna get to know each other as adults. The physical attraction is not what started their good rapport. Their friendship is based purely on their interests and genuine pull towards each other.

There were times I had to stop reading and google something because this book had a lot of English slang! I thought I had a grasp of their slang, but sometimes I felt like I was reading a different language.

The ending felt a bit rushed compared to the slow burn happening throughout the book, but it was sweet if you're into grand gestures and such.

The story is a bit predictable and there were tons of the cliche tropes you'd find in a chick lit, but it was fun and compelling. I could relate to the character, and all in all, I just wanted her to be happy. I wanted her to finally let go of her demons and move on. And I wanted her to find her Mr. Darcy in a pool of Collinses and Wickhams.

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[Chelsea (chelseadolling reads) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Omgggggg. I devoured this. I loved how light and fluffy and hilarious this was while still having just the right amount of seriousness sprinkled in. While there were a few crude jokes in here that made me feel a little iffy, I still wholeheartedly adored this. I am SO GLAD I BOUGHT ALL OF MHAIRI MCFARLANE’S BOOKS.

[Jacob Proffitt · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book had to have been quite a challenge to write. I mean, not only did McFarlane undertake to convey the reality of someone bullied mercilessly in school who carries that trauma well into adulthood, but she undertook at the same time to redeem the centrally traumatic person involved and make him the love interest. That is a near-insurmountable task and I'm happy to report that, at least for me, she pulled it off beautifully.

It helps that while they both have some distance from the events both also have some ground to make up, still, to become the kind of people who can be together in a healthy relationship. So the story is able to show, on-page, the growth arc both manage and to show how they do so, at least in part, together (or with the impetus/help each of the other). I loved that Anna needed to learn to accept and forgive her younger self and to put those events into a perspective that would no longer haunt her. And I loved that James had the courage to make structural changes in his life, even though they left him significantly adrift, just because they were the right thing to do. And I love even more that both had to lean carefully into their changes, with setbacks and retrenchment along the way, but a determination to get where they wanted/needed to be regardless.

And it doesn't hurt that McFarlane is one of those few writers where I can acknowledge and admire their particularly adroit phrase-craft without it breaking the flow of the story with my admiration. I'm normally a huge fan of Orson Scott Card's advocacy of "transparent" prose that works to project story without drawing attention to itself. But some authors represent a personal exception to this guideline and McFarlane has become a new addition to that club, for me.

It wasn't all smooth sailing, though. I nearly bogged down in the middle as I saw little forward progress with the characters I cared about and key relationships seemed mired in the shallow end of the emotional pool. I didn't have to resolve or push through for very long, but it left a kind of wary tension for a while until the story picked back up.

So I'm going to end this with a 4½ star rating that I'll gladly round up in acknowledgement of the unprecedented (I think, I'm not actually looking it up) 23 highlights I made while reading...

A note about Steamy/Chaste: Unfortunately, I finished this about a week ago and I forget if there was explicit sex in it. I recall some great kissing, but Anna isn't in a place where sex is really on the table until the end and she's smart enough that she wasn't going to go there without some emotional intimacy involved. And once the emotional arc had been completed any explicit sex would have been simply gratuitous. I'm going to tag this as chaste, but I want to admit that I forget if there was more, somehow.

[Laura Tenfingers · Rating 2 out of 5]

Our heroine was savagely bullied in high school. Years later, after attempted suicide and plenty of therapy, she's doing awesome but still looking for love. She then falls in love with the boy who bullied her. I'm sorry, WHAT?

Mhairi McFarlane can make anything readable and this is no exception. It definitely had aspects of fun and cute and warm and runny. But the whole read was blanketed by dark trepidation because oh my god she's going to fall for her bully! What the actual fuck? The premise being that everyone deserves forgiveness and a second chance and we all change and we're all bastards as children BUT.

[Susan's Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved the strong female character in this enemies to friends to lovers story by the incomparable Mhairi McFarlane. This author is the Boss of humourous slice of life women's fiction. Her characters are always down to earth and likeable: I love spending time with them.
This novel is a variation on the theme in Its Not Me, It's You.
It didn't take long to notice that this author tends to use the same tropes, with a few switch ups.
McFarlane's novels have a specific conflict that drives the storyline in each of her novels. For example, infidelity in Its Not Me, It's You; bullying and self-image/acceptance in Here's Looking at You.

McFarlane appears to have a very clear message for her readers. Get out, live your life, take the risk of rejection: put it out there and tell the object of your affections ABOUT your affections. Hmmmm, a lot of us have been there, done that, and yup, egg on our faces. But to be fair, McFarlane also explores the excruciating fear of actually making said declaration of love, and then describes the inevitable dejection of the rejected suitor, post confession. We can't win them all, but we should be brave and put ourselves out there. Got it - I hear you, Mhairi McFarlane - but I am at a stage in my life where I just like to read about everyone else's daring forays into relationships and HEAs.

I love this author's humour and vivid writing style, so even though I may have traveled down a similar road with her before, she changes things up enough and provides such enticing characters that I don't mind at all! So looking forward to slowly making my way through this author's other books.

[Marguerite Kaye · Rating 3 out of 5]

Note - this is a revised review and not the original.

I wrote my first review of this after finishing it in a rage at the way Mills&Boon books were used in the story, and decided not to grade the book because I knew that my view was extremely coloured as a result. Calm reflection and the urging of several fellow M&B authors made me get in touch with the author directly to express my concerns. I have to say, she not only took my concerns seriously, but took the time to express her own reasons and POV. We didn’t agree on everything, there are some things we agreed to differ on, but she has graciously allowed me to quote her, and I’ve realised that in some ways I was out of line and decided to go back and take a fresh look at the book. I’d like to stress that this re-review was my own idea and not the author’s. So here goes now – with a warning, it’s long!

First up, the use of ‘Mills&Boon’ as a derisory term full of assumptions about the contents of the books, about them being cliché-ridden fantasies that are only read by sad women who don’t have real romance in their life. Sadly, I come across this attitude all the time, not least from my own family – and in particular the males. People who don’t read romance mock it. The press takes the p*s out of the genre in a way that wouldn’t be accepted if it wasn’t written mostly by women. Having a pop at ‘Mills&Boon’ is easy, and it gets us all furious, as readers and writers, because it’s wrong on so many levels. No need to go into the why’s, we’ve all been there, all defended or walked away or ranted or cried about it. But the fact is, people do it. And James, to quote Ms McFarlane, 'is a 30-something metropolitan male who fancies himself, and I think we can safely say, someone who would not be seen dead reading any romance, M&B or otherwise'.

True. In the scene I objected to most, James picks up Anna’s book, reads it out jeeringly, asks Anna why she likes it. He listens to her defence of the genre. Then he tries, as he woos Anna, to ‘get it’ – to vocalise his feelings, to try the odd romantic gesture. Not because he’s converted to romantic novels, but because he wants Anna and that’s what Anna wants. So in the final scene, in the restaurant, when he’s got her, he lapses back into mocking M&B again. Which yes, I think is true to character, and sadly true to life. In fact, if James had been one of my relatives I would have laughed at him and that’s what Ms McFarlane truly intended, I believe.

Okay next, Anna, the M&B-lover in the book. My issue with her was that she could be flagged up as a clichéd M&B reader, having once been fat and bullied, now unattractive but unable to see it. I didn’t discuss this point with the author, but I do feel that she played into the hands of the M&B-haters a wee bit. And I do feel that had she been a true fan of the genre, she would have defended that, for me, wrong line the line at the end - 'Mills & Boon heroines don't usually do string-free bonks. There's always a wedding at the end...(they are) an old-fashioned fantasy'.

And this we did discuss. Ms McFarlane has read recent M&Bs, so I was wrong to criticise her lack of research, but she’s not an avid reader. The fact is that there are so many imprints written by such a range of authors catering for wildly different readers that it’s true, ‘string-free bonks’ are a no-no in lots of cases. But not all. And in my view, definitely not in the majority of stories. Yes, sex does mean something when the hero and heroine meet, but that doesn’t mean that the heroine hasn’t had sex before and it hasn’t been particularly meaningful. Ms McFarlane suggested that wouldn’t be the case in Historicals. I agree to an extent, the consequences would have been more dire, and sexual history is sometimes a conflict, but not always. But I’d also say here that my judgement was VERY coloured because in MY books there isn’t always a standard HEA involving marriage and kids, and in MY books the heroines sometimes do behave unconventionally. The thing is though, I was being specific and Ms McFarlane was generalising. So to be absolutely fair, we were both right.

The main point that I still objected to, and which remains painful for me, which was the actual excerpt which James reads aloud form a so-called M&B historical which was done in what I’d call a Barbara Cartland-ish style. I still object to this. The language implied that M&B heroines hang about waiting to be rescued, it used flowery clichés and implied they were wilting wallflowers with no mind of their own. No doubt there are still such Historicals out there, but I believe they are definitely in the minority, and that not only are M&B Historical heroines independent and strong-willed, they quite often rescue the hero. I am biased, there’s no doubt about it, and I took this a personal slight when I shouldn’t have, also no doubt about that. But one of the most back-handed complements I get in reviews is that new readers (to me or to the line) are 'surprised at how well written it is'! So although this was satire, I felt and still feel that this aspect of the book was inappropriate. That said, Ms McFarlane has agreed to put some M&B Historicals on her 2014 reading list, so…

So what’s the upshot of all this? I was wrong, and I apologise for going off on one and for allowing what I took to be personal slights to colour my judgement – and for taking things too personally, which I think is the same thing. I stand by my comments on the content of the ‘Mills&Boon Historical’ being all wrong. I can now see that James’s behaviour and comments are sadly accurate and intended to be laughed at, and that overall the book isn’t critical of M&B romance but actually intended to reinforce it as well as to use the tropes satirically. I can also see that Anna is, to quote Ms McFarlane, 'an intelligent, sympathetic and unapologetic modern fan of M&B and crucially remains so to the very end. Attaining James doesn’t mean she stops reading them'. True, but I do wish Anna had been more staunch in her defence and that she hadn’t reinforced some of the clichés about romance readers.

I’d like to thank Ms McFarlane for taking the time to have this out with me in private. In short (finally!) I owe her an apology for some of the things which I misinterpreted and which were coloured by my taking them personally - and so I do, I am sorry. But there’s also some things which I’ve wittered on about above that we will agree to differ on. She was happy to leave it at that, it was my idea to re-evaluate in the light of. Can I give her book a rating? I’ve done so, though I can’t honestly say that it’s unbiased because I still have strong personal feelings about some aspect of it that have everything to do with how romance in general is perceived, and not very much to do with this book. For me, those aspects spoilt the story, but that’s also personal and says more about me and my writing than Ms McFarlane’s. I will read the next one though, which I’m assured has no M&B in it at all.

[Vlora]

I can't really express my views on this book in a rating, so I'll try for a review instead.

(some spoilers ahead)

This is the second book I've read by Mhairi McFarlane, and I only kept reading, because I liked the first one so much. This author really knows how to create rich characters and how to develop them. This can mean that I struggle with the beginning of the book, because the characters haven't gone through that development yet and aren't yet that likeable. They fuck up. A lot. And since they're also called out for it that can be great.

I did have a very significant problem with this book though. The premise is that the protagonist, Anna, got bullied badly in school because she was fat and this experience hasn't ever really left her. She goes to a school reunion to exorcise the past and meets her former tormentor/crush. He doesn't recognise her, because she's lost so much weight and she walks out on the reunion, but then - surprise - she has to work with him on a project and gets to know him better.

Despite its many clichés (and Pride and Prejudice references, which I'm not sure were intentional, but must have been??), this book does get a lot of things right. It talks about bullying in a very honest way, it calls characters out for their bullshit, the former bully goes through a lot of development, characters make horrible mistakes and learn from them.

However, I can't get over the fact that it's still just another fat girl loses weight and suddenly finds love tale. It made me so uncomfortable to read in the beginning, because I know what it's like to be bullied because you're fat; to feel wary just walking down the street, because you know you're going to get called names; to blame yourself for all the rejection you experienced. If you've gone through all that shit, it doesn't really help to constantly be bombarded with fat shaming and narratives like these, that tell you you have to lose weight to find love and be happy and attractive. Yes, this book does a much better job than most at talking about bullying, but at its heart it still implies all those things.

I realise that some people do lose weight, but a lot of people also just stay fat and that doesn't make them worth any less or more. And to top it off, the way the book references Anna's weight loss is to just say that one day she realised the stuff she was eating wasn't her comfort for being treated badly but the thing that kept her from being part of the good life (I'm paraphrasing because I can't be arsed to look up the quote, but that's basically what it says), so she just puts on a track suit and starts running. Yeah. That's... really not how it works, usually.

Also, I mentioned the clichés, right? There are all the references to Pride and Prejudice, which are fine: distant father, mother who loses her shit when her daughters get married, Anna overhears James make an unflattering remark about her at the renunion that sticks with her, Anna's sister is very interested in clothes and having a grand wedding, James has an old friend from childhood who also tries to bed Anna and is an overall sucky guy, Anna's sister then almost sleeps with with aforementioned guy only to be saved by James, James helps Anna's sister financially, Anna's ridiculous suitors, Anna denies she doesn't have feelings for James, James completely transforms himself to become a better person after meeting Anna. You could almost call this a retelling, really (was it one? I was never quite sure). However, there's also all the other stuff - Anna is suddenly thrown together to work with her old bully/crush? What are the odds? He falls in love with her, the way you usually fantasise about when you have that unhealthy crush/bully combo deal in school? The let-me-show-you-how-to-bowl hug? The pretend dating? James' wife is an ice queen with no redeemable qualities whatsoever? IDEK, guys. I don't mind a good cliché, but I am fairly tired of some of those, especially the (ex)wife trope.

I hate that the book failed so badly in some regards, because it was so great in others. I loved how honest it was, and how Anna saw through people's bullshit. I loved the descriptions of her work life and her family (though her parents deserve to be called out on their bad behavior more often). I liked James' character development and truly hope he's a better person now. I loved the friendly teasing between Anna and James. Sadly, none of this really makes up for how it lets itself down in other regards. I just can't overlook that Anna's happy ending is losing lots of weight to become "hot" and go steady with her high school bully.

[Jultri · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is my 4th book by this author. The first 3 followed a winning formula of sort, where the book was purely from the heroine's POV, the initial male interest turns out to be a douchebag and the eventual hero did not feature until well into the story.

This book did not follow the same plot pattern and I, for one, wished it did. Instead we were introduced to the douchebag hero early on in the book, and not only that, we were exposed to his internal musings, something I could have done without. James was self-absorbed and thought too highly of himself. He was surrounded by nasty characters - crude colleagues, a repulsive and juvenile best friend (another fellow high schooler) and a bitchy wife who was even more self-absorbed than he was. These were his people and that should speak volumes about the person he was. He was badmouthing his sleazy best friend to Anna and blamed their ongoing friendship 15 years on as him having poor taste and judgement at school, when he only had himself to blame for remaining unevolved after such a long time

Usually the author creates strong-minded, admirable female heroines. In this book, the strongest female character was Empress Theodora, the subject of Anna's art history exhibition, which brought her in working close proximity to James, her high school crush and ultimate bully. Anna was such a down-trodden personality that even as a thirty-something year old, she thought she deserved the bullying at school because of the way she looked and dressed. She described herself in a derogatory form as a "porker", in essence fat-shaming herself in front of another. Perhaps that's why her initial animosity towards James dissipated so quickly after a few nice words from him, because she was excited that the hottest boy from school was now finally interacting with her.

Throughout most of the book, James showed absolutely no remorse at all over his cruel treatment of Anna and thought her bad-crazy now for still remaining angry and hurt over the fact that fellow students called her out for being the "freak" that she was. In fact, he was completely oblivious to the fact that his younger self was a mean S-O-B. He was also oblivious to the fact that his adult self had not mature that much further. Were we supposed to cheer and pat a 32 yo man on the back when he finally took a good look in the mirror and realised that there's a lot of growth and self-improvement to be had? I love a good story of redemption, but it was a little too little and a little too late.

James still felt entitled even after his supposed contrition near the end of the book, pushing for a place in Anna's life, even though he didn't even deserve to be a grain of dirt under her shoe. It wasn't until she finally asserted herself and told him the true extent of her past suffering that he withdrew his imposition on her. She was not the catalyst for his change because that implied that the change would have happened anyway albeit at a slower pace. Without Anna literally screaming the ugly truths at him, he would never had come to self-realisation of his past and ongoing cruelty and superficiality. He never took ownership for his past actions but blamed his behaviour on adolescent stupidity and the need to fit in, which made little sense when he was and still remained Mr Popular.

I felt that even after Anna finally stood up for her teenaged self and expressed to him that being overweight and unattractive did not make her deserving of his or anyone's vicious bullying, her lifelong insecurities still meant that she was grateful for his extension of friendship and that theirs was never going to be an equal relationship. Furthermore, after what he had put her through, did she really need to be humiliated further by his rejection? And after this late rejection, did she have to be the one reaching out to him again? In the end, James won big with minimal effort. What an unsatisfying ending. What a disappointment.

Good narration.

P.S. Who the hell wrote the blurb? It's dreadful, but in a way it captures everything I hated about this book: the insinuation that because she was a "roly poly" Italian with "pungent Mediterranean food", she was fair game to the bullies.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm going to be brutally honest here and say I choose this book because it looked pink, fluffy and I fancied an easy read that would make me laugh.

A few chapters in and I was struggling and not laughing and I reminded myself why I don't read girl meets boy books anymore and then all of a sudden I got into it, and I laughed a lot and also cried as this is more than a girl meets boy, this book tackles the subject of high school bullying and is really quite deep.

It took a while but when I got into it, I loved it and would definitely recommend it.

Five stars.

[Jacqueline · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hmmm this was more a tale of coming to terms with who you are and refusing to let your past influence your future.

This was witty and clever but the romance was lacking for me. They worked as friends but not as anything more I don't think. Not my favourite from this author.

[Ivy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Da hatte ich mal wieder zu hohe Erwartungen.
Aber der Vergleich mit Stolz und Vorurteil ist gar nicht unpassend. Und das gefällt mir.

Die Idee an sich ist gut und die eigentliche Sache zwischen Anna und James auch. Aber wie es sich so entwickelt und verläuft hat mir über weite Teile nicht gefallen. Ich fand es teilweise zu plätschernd, langatmig und belanglos.
Aber das ist wohl so typisch Chick-Lit. Genauso wie ein Haufen Klischees und wie vorhersehbar es letztendlich ist. Obwohl die Autorin es ein paar mal schafft, dass man überlegt ob es doch anders kommt.

Das Thema Mobbing ist einfühlsam verarbeitet und ich habe wirklich mit Anna und ihrer traumatischen Jugend mitgefühlt. Insgesamt hat mich der Umgang mit dem Thema aber auch nicht begeistert. Das "vom dicken Mädchen zur Schönheit" war definitiv zu klischeehaft. Und James als Schwarm und Peiniger kommt viel zu gut weg dabei, auch wenn man sich natürlich wünscht, dass die beiden zusammenfinden.

Dafür ist es insgesamt leicht und fluffig, liest es sich angenehm flüssig und das Ende hat mir dann wieder gefallen.
Insgesamt also eine nette Geschichte für Zwischendurch, unterhaltsam und gemütlich aber nichts Besonderes.

[Anna Casanovas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Me ha gustado muchísimo, la evolución de los protagonistas es sencillamente brillante y no solo son convincentes sino que los dos enamoran, tanto él como ella, algo que, en mi opinión, sucede en pocos libros. Al leer la contra puede parecer que el argumento es ya conocido, y probablemente lo es porque ¿cuántos libros hemos leído sobre el chico y la chica que se conocen en el instituto, se hacen daño, y se reencuentran de mayores? Muchos. Pero este es distinto, todo en él es distinto, desde el fantástico modo de escribir de la autora hasta los giros del argumento y un final absolutamente precioso.
Los discursos que se imagina Ana (Aureliana, la protagonista) son hilarantes y la escena de la boda de la hermana es preciosa.
Una única pega (muy, muy, muy pequeña), a mi corazón de romántica no le habría importado que el final hubiese sido más largo.
No conocía a esta autora, pero sin duda seguiré leyéndola.

[Claire Reads Books · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’ve now read all of Mhairi McFarlane’s published books, and while I always enjoy her writing and dialogue, I was expecting this one to be a bit of a miss, not only because it’s one of her earlier books, but also because it’s a bully romance. And so I was surprised that…this might be in my Top 3 of all her books! 😭 There are a fair few dated and borderline objectionable things in this book, beyond just the hero needing a serious redemption arc – there’s also discussions about beauty and weight and some uhh…exoticizing of Anna’s Italian heritage that has not aged well on several levels. But this is also one of MM’s more romance-focused books, and she ultimately really sold me on James and Anna – I almost don’t even want to call their dialogue and rapport “banter” because it feels so genuinely funny and familiar and lived-in, in a way that really reminded me why I love MM’s writing so much and why I just want to live inside the warmth and wit of her books. I also think that, for all this book’s rough edges and imperfections, the way MM explores the possibility of personal growth and change (and yes, redemption) over time was really quite thoughtful and even moving at times.

Edited to add: Can we bring back dual POV in contemporary romances?! I think this is MM’s only dual POV book and I think it’s a big reason why I ultimately warmed to the hero and bought into his redemption 😅

[Yoda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked this one right after I´ve read How to Find Love in a Bookshop and I didn´t regret it for a single moment.
Mhairi McFarlane has a great writing style and I enjoyed not only her characters and the setting, but most importantly the plot. Sometimes, or often, one of those doesn´t match the others this one had them all. She even managed to write an ending that even I couldn´t complain about. Definitely worth reading.
I never heard of this writer, apparently that´s something I should be ashamed about, but I´m really glad I picked it randomly at an airport. Need more books like this one.

[Blackjack · Rating 4 out of 5]

All of Mhairi McFarlane's books feel like 5 stars when I'm in the thick of things, but I did have some hesitations about this one, and since I didn't write a review immediately, the aspects I didn't like at the time have grown in significance over time. So, in the end, this is probably the only 4-star McFarlane book I have read, and honestly, I still was completely enthralled with it while reading.

The book tackles the difficult subject of bullying, but unlike Who's That Girl, where mean-girl bullying is also thematically center stage, in this book, it is the heroine as a child who is victimized. It's honestly heartwrenching and tortuous to read of the young Anna bullied by schoolmates, including by the hero of the novel. Even more poignantly, Anna's emotional scars from the experiences linger well into adulthood, and when she finally shares the devastation they caused her, it was truly hard reading.

I found the hero of this book quite challenging because I struggle still with understanding his motivations in choosing to harm someone. Can childhood bullies change as they age? I'm not entirely sure. I know that the book makes a very strong pitch for redeeming adult James, but I'm not sure it successfully does that, or at least not completely - a rare miss from McFarlane for me because I'm pretty fond of her ambiguous heroes. Adult James is complex, and as typical with this author's books, the road to romance is circuitous. Understanding the shallow aspects of James is hard going at times - why was he married to a vapid supermodel who loves herself more than anything else? Why does James have such superficial, toxic friendships in his adult life? Part of me felt he was a perpetual man-child, and that is not terribly attractive. Anna is sweet and kind and grew up to be a gracious and lovely woman. But, she also is riddled with self-doubt. How many men in this book have to fall in love with her for her to realize that she is attractive and worthy of romance? Things maybe felt a bit piled on, contrary to the more subtle type of writing McFarlane usually puts out.

I harbor some doubts but overall, I still enjoyed reading this book. I rooted for Anna and James despite some reservations. I loved Anna's sister and her relationship with her as well as her relationship with her friends. Friendship and generous support systems are a true strength for McFarlane. And, oh my gosh, Luther. He might be my favorite animal pet in all of romance writing. We're kept in the dark a bit about Luther's fate, but he ultimately is loved and valued and gets his HEA, which is essential to his narrative.

[Florina · Rating 2 out of 5]

dnf at 15%

Man, oh man, did this book anger me. I couldn't even get through the first 100 pages without wanting to hurl. Well, I guess I could have forced myself; the writing is funny & clever and the main character is not unbearable.

HOWEVER,

all that was squandered on a "from fat to beautiful" rom-com. Yes, against all odds, this story is based on the protagonist losing a lot of weight to discover she's worthy of romance. Of course, per custom, even though she's incredibly hot now, she's still got low self-esteem because her mindset is still that of a "fat" person. Joy.

I've looked up other reviews just to see if this storyline gets any better. It doesn't. McFarlane seems to want to make a point that bullying follows you your whole life and it doesn't simply go away when you become an adult. Fair enough. But she's also implying that the bullies were right. Your fatness is a problem. If you don't believe me, check out this lovely passage:

As she lost the pounds, then stones, her former identity melted away and a strange thing happened. She discovered she was pretty. The possibility had never occurred to her and, she was fairly sure, anyone else.

So yeah, this isn't Bridget Jones's Diary, no matter how hard it tries to be.

[Obsidian · Rating 4 out of 5]

So this was very cute and also sad at parts. I loved how McFarlane pretty much has you disliking the hero for a good portion of this book (who wouldn't?) before allowing him to grow on you as he did the heroine. I thought the book was very good at showing how damaging school can be to those who were and are bullied. I felt for Anna so much. And I have to say that Anna and her relationship with her sister was heart-warming. I also loved her friendship with her besties Michelle and Dan. Not a five star romance read (we don't get any love scenes) but a very good slow burn.

"Here's Looking at You" has Anna Alessi debating going to her old school reunion. Anna is not successful and is seen as attractive by members of the opposite sex. This is totally different than how she was in school and still has scars left over from that and the subsequent bad relationships she was in. Anna is pushed to go though and then she runs across James Fraser who was behind an incident that still leaves Anna in tears. He doesn't recognize her and Anna is happy she will never see him again. Until her newest project causes her and James to be thrown together. Anna doesn't want to remind James about who she was back in school, and James is going through his own personal problems as well. He still finds himself thinking more and more of Anna and wanting to be her friend.

So this was really good. Anna had so many layers. And I thought it was interesting to see a woman who is still not comfortable in her own skin still succeeding at her day job (history professor). Anna likes her routine, but finds it's become a mess after she starts interacting with James more and more. And I have to say that it was great that Anna wasn't initially lusting after him. What happened between them during school really did leave her a mess so she associates him with negative things. It was great to see how she started to see him as a friend (before he bungles things again).

James initially got on my nerves. He seems to view lying just as something someone does. When he doesn't want to admit to his colleagues that his wife has left him, he starts a white lie about seeing someone else (which who would think this makes you look better?) And then from there it quickly gets to be a mess with people thinking he is dating Anna. James also looks down on his colleagues, Anna initially, her sister, and just about everyone. It takes a while for the wanker to fall off James, but it does. I also realized for the first time in a long time I was okay with the two leads not getting together. Just James learning how to be a real friend was nice to read.

The secondary characters were great. I cracked up at the scene of Anna's sister and her fiancee doing wedding vows.

The writing was good, though the flow was a bit up and down. I think jumping back and forth between Anna and James is what did it. I love in McFarlane's latest books she sticks with the heroine and we get to see everything through her eyes. I know this was and sometimes is a thing in romance books that we must see the hero's point of view too, but I am okay with skipping over it when it adds nothing to the story. This time it does add to the story and I think it gives you (the reader) an interesting insight into Jamie.

The ending was pretty great I thought, though once again McFarlane does a fade to black.

[Dalimar · Rating 4 out of 5]

Con la sinopsis tan explícita, ya sabemos de que va el libro,la historia y es obvio que no es un tema nuevo. Pero está narrado de una forma exquisita. Es que no hay dudas que el mejor chick lit lo escriben los británicos. Primer libro que leo de la autora y sin dudas no será el único.

Dentro de la historia,me gustó la manera en que desarrolló el bullying que sufrió Anna. Trabajó muy bien todas las secuelas que ese maltrato lleva y el hecho de que aún pasando 16 años, ella no lo haya podido superar.

Me gustó mucho Anna,creo que a pesar de ser una mujer muy insegura,se deja querer. No es una chica que llegues a odiar,ni tampoco se está haciendo la víctima, ni creando lástima por lo que vivió. Aún no lo supera,pero salió hacia adelante y vivió para contarlo.

Los personajes secundarios también fueron de mi agrado. Ágata la hermana de Anna,fue un personaje fabuloso. Si yo tuviera una hermana si dudas quisiera tener una como ella y tener la relación tan estrecha que tiene ella con Anna. Igual sus padres,aunque nadie era perfecto, se les notaba el amor que todos en la familia sentían.

Hasta el villano de la historia,estuvo presente muy poco en el libro,pero dejó huellas en la historia. Laurence era el perfecto idiota,pero de esos hay muchos en la vida real.

Y por supuesto que tengo que hablar de James,el amor de adolescencia de Anna,quien la humilló frente a todos y le hizo mucho daño. Con él tuve una relación en el que la mayoría del tiempo lo odiaba. Lo odié de joven y 16 años después tampoco me agradó mucho. Pero la autora supo darle un giro a su vida,en el que pudimos ver que él aún siendo guapo y exitoso, había varias facetas de su vida en la que era muy infeliz y no se sentía un hombre completo. Seré mala,pero me gocé leer cuando las cosas le iban mal. El Karma existe y la autora al fin nos brindó esto. No se tomó la vía fácil de ponerlo aún guapo,rico,feliz y exitoso,como la mayoría de los personajes de hoy día. Eso sí, parecía una persona tan real,que por ratos lo odiaba y en otros lo entendía y hasta me agradaba.

La relación entre James y Anna,pasó varias etapas y se cocinó a fuego lento. Lo que la hizo realista y aunque hay muchas cosas que no soporté de James,no se puede negar que la química entre él y Anna fue perfecta. Ellos juntos eran perfectos,de enemigos, de amigos,de compañeros de trabajo y hasta en sus peleas,nunca perdieron la química. Por lo que terminé mirándolo a él con los mismos ojos con los que lo miraba Anna.

Al ser chick lit,carece de escenas de sexo y de hecho hay muy pocas románticas, pero eso en la relación entre ambos no les hizo falta para encendiarme el Kindle. De hecho,no quería que se acabara. Me encantó estar en la vida de todos los personajes.

La razón por la que lo leí, es porque además de adorar el chick lit,la editorial que lo publicó siempre que he leído un trabajo de ellos, es impecable. Ellos ni me regalaron el libro,ni nada,pero es la verdad y tengo que mencionarlo. Ya sabemos los lectores de libros en español, que muchas editoriales publican un trabajo pésimo, con malas traducciones , errores ortográficos, frases traducidas de una manera tan literal que pierden el sentido. Vale nadie es perfecto,pero los libros cuestan y los traductores cobran por su trabajo,los lectores nos merecemos que lo hagan bien.

[Rebekah · Rating 5 out of 5]

She thought seeing James again at work was a taunt from God, but what if it was a useful nudge from Him Above? Go. Look upon this creature and realise that really, him and his people aren’t all that.

It was authentically terrifying to think you could do so much damage to another human being, and then mentally store it away in the attic. Imagine if he’d never met her again? If he ever had kids, they’d have a Don’t Be Mean talk from him that’d involve a PowerPoint presentation.

Here’s Looking at You, is another gem by Mhairi McFarlane. Anna is a beautiful, successful, intelligent, kind, and funny history professor who is still living her life in the shadow of her miserable experience as a fat and ugly teenager who was unmercifully tormented and bullied by her peers. Her lowest point which has haunted her for years is when the golden boy she had a crush on took a leading role in her Carrie-like humiliation in front of the whole school. The book takes off when she meets him again, begins working with him professionally and he doesn’t recognize her. The book is told from both Anna’s and James’s points of view.

What made this book stand out from the typical ugly duckling story is that although James is certainly handsome, he is no prince. We know from Anna’s flashback that he was a shallow jerk as a teenager and although he has matured, he has continued to value the wrong things in life. He has a lot of changing and growing yet to do before he is worthy of being the “hero” in this story. Yet, we know from his voice and the comparison to his spoiled cold wife and his predator-like best friend that he has a good heart. I was very disappointed in him at one point and wondered how he was ever going to redeem himself in Anna’s eyes and my eyes. I credit the author for rescuing the character, not in one grand gesture, but a series of decisions and self-revelations. And a heck of a telling off courtesy of Anna. Please forgive Anna’s language here, but she is really mad. It’s not typical.

‘I don’t care if you’ve changed or not. Because I’ve changed. Because I don’t let superficial d***heads get to me anymore.’ James grimaced. ‘That’s harsh, Anna.’ She was finally riled. She felt the kind of raging hurt that swelled behind the chest wall and travelled up the throat and out of the mouth in the form of ugly words. ‘That’s harsh?! Try five years of daily hell topped with a public demonstration that a whole school-full of people hate you, James…Every night I poured it all into my diary, great screeds of misery. I promised myself that one day I would get away. That the time would come when I’d never have to see any of you f****rs again. And by being friends with you, I’m betraying that girl. That’s why I don’t want to be friends. You didn’t want to be friends back then. But you do now, now that the very sight of me isn’t an embarrassment. Well, I don’t want to know you. What did you call that, “harsh”? Why don’t you try to pick up the shattered pieces of your life and limp on?’

That's just a snippet. At the end of her tirade, James finally realizes the extent of her damaged childhood and the strong character she had to have to bounce back from it. Anna herself is finally cleansed of the last vestiges.

Mhairi's characterizations of all the players are detailed, layered, and complex. I’ve read three books by Ms McFarlane now and all have been different; not fitting the same template that similar authors seem to sometimes get stuck in. Some of the reviews have noted the similarities between this novel and Pride and Prejudice. Although the plot is different, there are some parallels in the characters. I can see that maybe it is a homage to that classic novel, or the author just having some fun. Funny, interesting, briskly paced, and heart-tugging, I was "all in" every page of the way.
06/19/2024. Feel the same about this wonderful book, read on audio. There is just so much to this story. Something interesting, dramatic, funny, or entertaining in every short chapter. Mhairi never lets the plot flag or start going around in circles. Though not the best, the narration by Cassandra Harwood was very enjoyable, though her heavy regional accent (Devonshire-I think?) was a bit distracting.

https://rebekahsreadingsandwatchings....

[Lena Black · Rating 1 out of 5]

Knjiga- meh. 1.5 ★
Lagunin prevod- katastrofa.

[Mela · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that in the best love stories both characters change before our eyes. This is one of the reasons, why P&P is so loved, Elizabeth and Darcy had flaws that they conquered in the end. Love was the spark, but their changes were deeper, not just to get the person. They changed for good.

The same was in "Here's Looking at You". Anna and James evolved. And what is very important - I bought these changes. Often in romances, I get the feeling that the changes are unbelievable or unstable in a long turn. Not this time. Perhaps there wasn't a moment when I was 'girly thrilled' or wanted to swoon --> this romance was something better because it was deeper.

Not finding someone wasn’t a failure, it was just a fact

This novel showed that one doesn't need another person to be whole. It could have ended at it. But we love HEA - and we got it ;-)

I had easily felt for young Anna because I had a bit similar years in my youth. Not as drastic, nonetheless I understood her completely...

She went to school keen and eager to learn and what she learned was that she was worthless.

Despite very sad Anna's past, the story was at many moments hilarious. And some metaphors were genial. I am sure that there is an 'age group', my age group that understands some of them. And I am also sure, that with everyone from this group I could talk for hours. So, if you understand e.g. these below - you are my mate ;-)

Anna had helicoptered him out of Saigon

The artist formerly known as evil James Fraser

I agree completely with Rebekah, so for more I recommend her review.

[Cameron · Rating 1 out of 5]

I found the characters annoying and the fact that the main woman constantly compared being fat to being ugly. And bruh. That's not true. It would have been so much cooler if it was a fat girl who was confident in her weight after being bullied. Also not a fan of the bully being the love interest. If my middle school bully came back into my life... I would punch him in the face and leave. Not start a romance.

[Sam I AMNreader · Rating 4 out of 5]

My fat fingers deleted my very recent 4.37 review. Loved this, wish the heroine was more self-actualized, and adore the hero.

[ß · Rating 1 out of 5]

no words just disappointment

[mangosbookshelf · Rating 3 out of 5]

An sich eine ganz schöne Geschichte, aber mir hat iwie das Gewisse etwas gefehlt.

[Patrizia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Worum geht es?
Anna Alessi ist Historikerin, liebt ihren Job und hat sich mit ihren ewig unordentlichen Haaren und ihrem manchmal vorlauten Mundwerk abgefunden. Ein Mann für die romantischen Momente des Lebens wäre schon nett – aber ihr geht’s gut, viel besser als sie jemals gehofft hätte. Denn als Jugendliche war sie dick und eigenbrötlerisch, ein beliebtes Zielobjekt für organisiertes Mobbing. Ausgerechnet ihr heimlicher Schwarm James Fraser trieb dies gekonnt auf die Spitze und stellte sie in seinem ärgsten Coup vor der gesamten Schule bloß. Als sie ihm 16 Jahre später bei einem Klassentreffen wieder begegnet, erkennt er sie nicht – so sehr hat sie sich äußerlich verändert. Doch auch Anna erkennt James kaum wieder. Er ist höflich. Reif. Sogar lustig. Können Menschen sich wirklich so verändern?(via Argon)
_______________________
Wie hat es mir gefallen?
Ich gebe zu, mir fällt es sehr schwer mir vorlesen zu lassen. Damit ich nicht bei einem Hörbuch einschlafe, braucht es einen charismatischen Sprecher, beziehungsweise eine charismatische Sprecherin. Wem es ebenso geht: Britta Steffenhagen hat es mir sehr einfach gemacht, nicht einzuschlafen, denn ihre Stimme ist tatsächlich sehr charismatisch und vor allem rauchig. Und gerade das passte meiner Meinung nach ganz hervorragend zu der Protagonistin Anna. Eine seichte Mäusschenstimme wäre hier wirklich Fehl am Platz gewesen, denn Anna ist ohne Frage nicht auf den Mund gefallen. Aber auch alle anderen Rollen wurden authentisch gesprochen.

Dieser Aspekt hat mir wiederum den Einstieg in die Geschichte selbst ungemein erleichtert. Anna, die einerseits sehr präzise in ihrer wissenschaftlichen Arbeit als Historikerin ist und andererseits im Privatleben eine kleine Chaotin, wird zum Klassentreffen ihrer ehemaligen Schule eingeladen. Auf Anraten ihrer besten Freunde (die übrigens besonders zynisch drauf sind - das gefällt!) soll Anna unbedingt zu diesem Klassentreffen gehen, um eben zu zeigen, dass sie nicht mehr das schüchterne, dicke Mädchen ist. Zwar war allen durchaus bewusst, dass Anna dort auf ihren ehemaligen Schwarm James trifft, aber dass er sie nicht erkennt und Anna auch später durch ein neues Museumsprojekt (das war für mich als eine, die Geschichte studiert hat, auch sehr interessant) mit ihm zusammen arbeiten muss, das ahnt keiner. Probleme sind da natürlich vorprogrammiert.

Das liest sich insgesamt wieder wie dieser eine typische Liebesromane oder gar Teeniefilm, vielleicht ist es auch ein wenig so. Der Plot ist nicht unbedingt neu, Anna repräsentiert aber keinesfalls das typische Dummchen. Sie ist smart, sarkastisch, laut und intelligent - außerdem hat sie das gewisse Extra an Farbe! Soll heißen, sie ist alles andere als farblos. Aber auch James hat schon so einiges durch und präsentiert sich als interessanter Charakter mit Ecken und Kanten. Aber selbst wenn der Plot eher 08/15 war, das Ende für mich ebenfalls vorhersehbar, machen alle Interaktionen zwischen Anfang und Ende, die coolen, teils anzüglichen Gespräche und die Biografien der einzelnen Figuren Vielleicht mag ich dich morgen zu einer hörens- wie ebenso lesenswerten Geschichte, die in vielen Punkten doch ausgefallen ist. Die Ideen sind nicht aus der Luft gegriffen, ein Hineinversetzen fiel mir persönlich zumindest sehr leicht und ich habe an der ein oder anderen Stelle wirklich schmunzeln müssen, oder aber mich mit den Figuren zusammen geärgert.

Was mir aber definitiv gen Ende gefehlt hat, waren die Emotionen. Ich hatte schon erwartet, dass die Konflikte insoweit hochkochen, dass bei mir zumindest ein kleines bisschen das Fass überläuft und Taschentuchalarm ausgelöst werden kann - dem war aber leider gar nicht so. Aber wie das eben mit Erwartungen so ist, manchmal werden sie sogar übertroffen, manchmal eben nicht.

Trotzdem war Vielleicht mag ich dich morgen in vielerlei Hinsicht ein nettes und authentisches Hörvergnügen und ist meiner Meinung nach nicht nur auf die Sommerlektüre zu beschränken. Der Emotionstrubel blieb leider aus, gute Unterhaltung gab es aber trotzdem und scharfe Zungen sind bei mir immer gern gesehen. Dafür gab es 3,5 Sterne und Britta Steffenhagen spricht so gut, dass ich gerade Wir in drei Worten, ebenfalls geschrieben von Mhairi McFarlane, höre.

[Muthulakshmi · Rating 2 out of 5]

Yeah, whatever.

[Seline · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

This made me cry and I don’t know if I like James or not.
Anna deserves better to be honest and the romance was really rushed.

[Dani · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF.

Fuck this book.

I generally like Mhairi McFarlane. I like that her books deal with some hard things in life, like struggling with self-doubt and self-esteem, grief and loss, feeling stuck, etc. I think so many of these things are universal struggles, and I really appreciate that she’s writing about not-fun things in an honest, intimate way.

And if this book was about a girl who got bullied by a boy, I could live with it. Because, yeah, which one of us fat girls didn’t have a similar experience?

But. BUT.

Imagine my surprise to learn…

It’s not fatphobia spewing from the mouth of a bully. Nope. It’s fucking fatphobic from start to finish. The writing, not the characters. It’s rampant and incessant. This book is, frankly, hateful and harmful.

And I’m just so disappointed. It’s like learning that an author you really like and respect is actually kind of terrible at times, like rude to waiters at restaurants or leaves their empty grocery cart in handicapped-accessible parking spaces. Except the author I like and admire thinks it’s ok to say things like “the width of a doorway” to refer to someone with a larger body. Or that we can’t be attractive until we lose enough weight that our bones show through.

Oh and I just *love* the implied judgement that fat people just need to stop eating tiramisu and eat fish instead. HELLO, FELLOW CHUBS-DID Y’ALL CATCH THAT? This is the nutritional advice that we’ve been hoping for, but have never ever heard before! It’s so easy! And hey, once you get skinny, you can be pretty! People might actually notice you and think you are worth something! (Please, honestly—fat people are not stupid, and they have definitely heard your “helpful” nutrition advice before, and I’m gonna be honest, ITS NOT HELPFUL OR TRUE. AT ALL.)

(Also, so…she’s so admirable for changing her diet to lose weight…and now she gets to drink cocktails and eat pizza because she’s not fat anymore? Nice. Fish for the fatties, pizza for the BMI under 25 crowd! Got it! Pizza and booze are magically more nutritionally acceptable if your ass isn’t the size of a barge. It’s science.)

I’m a woman in my 40s who has never had a small body. I’ve dealt with casual fatphobia my entire life. So, none of this is new or different. It’s just fucking disappointing to find it in a book you thought you’d love. There is SO much good contemporary romance out there that is kind and loving and accepting of people with different bodies. It’s just too damn bad this isn’t one of them.

So, if you, like me, want a better book than this, please check out Talia Hibbert or Olivia Dade. You don’t have to be fat yourself to read books in which fat people are allowed to exist and fall in love and be treated with respect without proving their worth on a scale.

And if you are a writer and you want to write about fat people, please fucking talk to someone in your life who has actually lived in a fat body. Preferably one who has learned that they are worthy of love and kindness, just as they are. And if you can’t find anyone who fits the bill, write a different story.