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Holy Disruptor: Shattering the Shiny Facade by Getting Louder with the Truth
Even if you've been silenced, you can find your God-given voice.
Overbearing leadership. Toxic environments. Unfair standards and unrealistic expectations. There are many ways that people abuse, manipulate, and silence others. The worst part is the abuser is often someone you love.
Amy Duggar King knows what it's like to be coerced and have her voice silenced. On TLC's hit reality show 19 Kids and Counting, Amy was branded "Crazy Cousin Amy"--an identity she didn't choose but was forced to live into. Her authentic voice was taken from her as she was told to put on a shiny, happy smile for the camera. The gaslighting continued as she was told off-camera, "You're too much" and "You're not enough."
But in the years since the Duggar family collapse, Amy has intentionally dissociated from the toxic family environment, which has helped her discover how to be a "holy disruptor" and make life-changing decisions for her well-being. In Holy Disruptor, Amy shares her unfiltered testimony of breaking free and describes how you
Learn to trust your instinctsSee clearly in a fog of liesUnearth and use your authentic voiceBecome a holy disruptorDisrupt cycles of generational trauma in your familyBreak free from toxic environmentsEmbrace freedomEnhance your well-beingLive with passion and purpose
God loves you, and he's given you an authentic voice to use for his glory. No matter what you've been told or how you've been manipulated in the past, freedom is waiting for you today. It's time to use your voice.
Overbearing leadership. Toxic environments. Unfair standards and unrealistic expectations. There are many ways that people abuse, manipulate, and silence others. The worst part is the abuser is often someone you love.
Amy Duggar King knows what it's like to be coerced and have her voice silenced. On TLC's hit reality show 19 Kids and Counting, Amy was branded "Crazy Cousin Amy"--an identity she didn't choose but was forced to live into. Her authentic voice was taken from her as she was told to put on a shiny, happy smile for the camera. The gaslighting continued as she was told off-camera, "You're too much" and "You're not enough."
But in the years since the Duggar family collapse, Amy has intentionally dissociated from the toxic family environment, which has helped her discover how to be a "holy disruptor" and make life-changing decisions for her well-being. In Holy Disruptor, Amy shares her unfiltered testimony of breaking free and describes how you
Learn to trust your instinctsSee clearly in a fog of liesUnearth and use your authentic voiceBecome a holy disruptorDisrupt cycles of generational trauma in your familyBreak free from toxic environmentsEmbrace freedomEnhance your well-beingLive with passion and purpose
God loves you, and he's given you an authentic voice to use for his glory. No matter what you've been told or how you've been manipulated in the past, freedom is waiting for you today. It's time to use your voice.
240 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 14, 2025
700 people are currently reading
5735 people want to read
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October 20, 2025Once again, fuck you, Jim Bob Duggar!!!
October 16, 2025
I met Amy back in 2007 when I stayed with the Duggar family, and even then, I remember her quietly pulling me aside and sharing pieces of her story. She shared truths she was still finding the courage to speak. Reading Holy Disruptor felt like hearing the rest of that conversation all these years later, only now with strength, healing, and purpose woven through every page.
Amy tells her story with honesty and grace. She doesn’t sugarcoat the pain or the dysfunction she grew up in, but she also doesn’t stay there. What moved me most was how she transformed that generational toxicity into something healthy and hopeful for her own son. It’s not just a memoir; it’s a manual for anyone who’s determined to parent differently, to love deeply, and to break cycles that once felt unbreakable.
This book is brave, raw, and redemptive. I’m proud of the woman Amy has become and grateful she’s using her voice to bring light where silence once lived.
Amy tells her story with honesty and grace. She doesn’t sugarcoat the pain or the dysfunction she grew up in, but she also doesn’t stay there. What moved me most was how she transformed that generational toxicity into something healthy and hopeful for her own son. It’s not just a memoir; it’s a manual for anyone who’s determined to parent differently, to love deeply, and to break cycles that once felt unbreakable.
This book is brave, raw, and redemptive. I’m proud of the woman Amy has become and grateful she’s using her voice to bring light where silence once lived.
December 12, 2025
Amy's story added a lot to the Duggar-verse, things I couldn't have even imagined (if you thought Josh was the only creep, think again). You can tell she's still being affected by it, because of how emotional she gets when she's narrating.
It was interesting to see how the seemingly more "normal" side (that was anything but) of the Duggar family lived, and how Amy found refuge from the abuse with her cousins, and their many rules.
She gives grace to some people who probably don't deserve it, while really going after others, but never to the point of being mean. I think she 100% could've been angrier, but I admire her restraint.
This is probably my second fav Duggar book now, the inside-outside perspective was very much needed, and I'm glad that Amy chose to share her story.
It was interesting to see how the seemingly more "normal" side (that was anything but) of the Duggar family lived, and how Amy found refuge from the abuse with her cousins, and their many rules.
She gives grace to some people who probably don't deserve it, while really going after others, but never to the point of being mean. I think she 100% could've been angrier, but I admire her restraint.
This is probably my second fav Duggar book now, the inside-outside perspective was very much needed, and I'm glad that Amy chose to share her story.
October 15, 2025
I assumed everyone thought of the "Crazy Amy" as ironic, bc it was so obvious that it was JB family that was behaving so crazy. Seeing them in contrast to a very normal young girl made it more obvious that they were a bit of a cult. Her reflections on generational trauma and abuse are touching and authentic. At times I did get a little confused as to when in time we were, but not a huge deal.
October 16, 2025
I remember watching Amy on TV growing up! I was looking forward to this book to gain some more insight into her life growing up and her Duggar cousins. While there were some really good chapters that gave insight into the Family habits/trauma the writing style felt conflicting in this book. I felt like I was consistently flipping from a memoir to a self help book to a religious book. I would have loved more continuity and more memoir focused writing.
December 3, 2025
I accidentally purchased this one instead of the one I wanted on audible, but decided "hey, may as well listen through it if I bought it anyway."
I read it from the perspective of someone who has never actually watched The Duggar show but am generally familiar with the family and closely acquainted with the Bill Gothard belief system.
My three stars is not based upon the actual recounting of her story itself. I fully emphasize with the trauma caused by the many forms of abuse going on within her family and applaud her for her ability to put into words and work through each of those abuses and traumas to create a better future for her own children.
I rated it low because the story was told in a really jumbled way. She jumped around timelines so much it was incredibly difficult to pinpoint where in the timeline we were as she told different aspects of the story. Which although typical when recounting abuse, when reading a book it was very difficult to follow. It's possible it would have made more sense had I actually watched the TV show and could recognize where in the story she was referring to. But it seems like you should write a book in such a way that it makes sense whether or not you have already watched 80 episodes of the duggers.
I think this book could possibly help someone who has not identified how harmful abuse within their home can be, but I'd say it's more likely to mostly resonate with people who understand and have already come through abuse themselves and are looking back. But I'm not necessarily sure if it would help them heal, more that they would understand what she is trying to say.
I think she's still dealing with a lot of anger, albeit justified anger, but hasn't necessarily found a healthy resting place of being able to both balance that evil was done requiring strict boundaries and that it's time to move on in her life and find peace. It's apparent she has started her healing journey, but I'm not sure she's finished it.
One side note that does not affect how I rated the book but is just a personal opinion.
She's obviously very close to her mother and grandmother, and I understand how love can fog your perspective. But it really bothered me how she really emphasized
'they kept me safe from my grandfather, making sure my door was locked at night.'
and almost idolized them for them that. But they did not remove her from his home. It is a common misconception in families that it is enough to safeguard the innocent within the home of the abuser. she should have never been in a house with him. both Mom and Grandma should have either removed Grandpa from the home or her from the home. it is apparent reading the book that whether they were able to sexually protect her or not, the verbal and physical abuse still have lifelong consequences.
It's not enough to say she was not "as abused" as her mother she shouldn't have been abused by someone who both mom and Grandma knew was dangerous.
I read it from the perspective of someone who has never actually watched The Duggar show but am generally familiar with the family and closely acquainted with the Bill Gothard belief system.
My three stars is not based upon the actual recounting of her story itself. I fully emphasize with the trauma caused by the many forms of abuse going on within her family and applaud her for her ability to put into words and work through each of those abuses and traumas to create a better future for her own children.
I rated it low because the story was told in a really jumbled way. She jumped around timelines so much it was incredibly difficult to pinpoint where in the timeline we were as she told different aspects of the story. Which although typical when recounting abuse, when reading a book it was very difficult to follow. It's possible it would have made more sense had I actually watched the TV show and could recognize where in the story she was referring to. But it seems like you should write a book in such a way that it makes sense whether or not you have already watched 80 episodes of the duggers.
I think this book could possibly help someone who has not identified how harmful abuse within their home can be, but I'd say it's more likely to mostly resonate with people who understand and have already come through abuse themselves and are looking back. But I'm not necessarily sure if it would help them heal, more that they would understand what she is trying to say.
I think she's still dealing with a lot of anger, albeit justified anger, but hasn't necessarily found a healthy resting place of being able to both balance that evil was done requiring strict boundaries and that it's time to move on in her life and find peace. It's apparent she has started her healing journey, but I'm not sure she's finished it.
One side note that does not affect how I rated the book but is just a personal opinion.
She's obviously very close to her mother and grandmother, and I understand how love can fog your perspective. But it really bothered me how she really emphasized
'they kept me safe from my grandfather, making sure my door was locked at night.'
and almost idolized them for them that. But they did not remove her from his home. It is a common misconception in families that it is enough to safeguard the innocent within the home of the abuser. she should have never been in a house with him. both Mom and Grandma should have either removed Grandpa from the home or her from the home. it is apparent reading the book that whether they were able to sexually protect her or not, the verbal and physical abuse still have lifelong consequences.
It's not enough to say she was not "as abused" as her mother she shouldn't have been abused by someone who both mom and Grandma knew was dangerous.
October 7, 2025
I got an advanced listener copy of this book and knew I had to read it. Amy was my favorite “character” on 19 kids and counting. I found that I related to her in a lot of ways, and I believe they included her in the show so producers could show how different someone from the “outside world” was to the Duggar children.
Her story was heartbreaking and emotional. She seemed to tell her story with her heart on her sleeve and got rather emotional at times (rightfully so). Between her rough upbringing, discovering Josh’s behavior, and dealing with narcissistic men around every corner, Amy was the perfect narrator to tell her own account.
Her story was heartbreaking and emotional. She seemed to tell her story with her heart on her sleeve and got rather emotional at times (rightfully so). Between her rough upbringing, discovering Josh’s behavior, and dealing with narcissistic men around every corner, Amy was the perfect narrator to tell her own account.
November 6, 2025
I thought this book was insightful. However, my humble opinion is that she set out to write a book (any book) but didnt know what she wanted it to be about. It felt equal parts memoir, religious reflection and self help. Because of that, the book lacked focus - and not enough time spent in any one space.
That said, her writing is really well done and more evolved than I had expected. She delved into her time with her family, both her aunt and uncle, as well as her parents. And her complicated relationship with her grandparents. But we got little insight into HER! And I struggled with that.
That said, her writing is really well done and more evolved than I had expected. She delved into her time with her family, both her aunt and uncle, as well as her parents. And her complicated relationship with her grandparents. But we got little insight into HER! And I struggled with that.
January 4, 2026
I really read this because I love to hate Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar and there’s a lot of fuel here, but Amy has really been through it herself. Not only has Jim Bob been terrible to her and her mother (his sister) there’s so much abuse in her own family. Lots of Duggar damage from way back, plus Amy’s father. With all these skeletons in the closet why would these people ever go on TV?
January 25, 2026
Amy Dugger king.!
When I watched the Duggers I got the impression that Amy was the black sheep of her uncles family. she was there but not really.I was surprised at the relationship she had with her grandparents. Her grandma looked meek and shy on tv. But she was hurting as well. I'm glad her life is so much better. A lovely and sad story.
When I watched the Duggers I got the impression that Amy was the black sheep of her uncles family. she was there but not really.I was surprised at the relationship she had with her grandparents. Her grandma looked meek and shy on tv. But she was hurting as well. I'm glad her life is so much better. A lovely and sad story.
October 17, 2025
I was very pleasantly surprised by this book. Amy shared her own story and didn’t focus heavily on anyone else’s. The family she grew up in experienced betrayal and emotional abuse through manipulation, pornography, and secrecy. It’s awesome to read about how she married a wonderful man who will break the cycle. I loved this quote from the end of the book:
“Anyone who treats you abusively does not love you, plain and simple. Love is built on respect, kindness, and mutual care—not control, manipulation, or emotional blackmail. So when someone keeps violating your boundaries or makes you question reality through mind games, that’s not love; it’s control. And you absolutely have the right to walk away from that nonsense, even if it means cutting ties with people you thought would always be in your life. Because honestly, staying around just to keep the peace? Not worth losing your sanity over.”
“Anyone who treats you abusively does not love you, plain and simple. Love is built on respect, kindness, and mutual care—not control, manipulation, or emotional blackmail. So when someone keeps violating your boundaries or makes you question reality through mind games, that’s not love; it’s control. And you absolutely have the right to walk away from that nonsense, even if it means cutting ties with people you thought would always be in your life. Because honestly, staying around just to keep the peace? Not worth losing your sanity over.”
October 21, 2025
I watched every episode of 19 Kids and Counting growing up, so of course I will read every book that continues to come out from this family😅
Honestly, I thought it book would be redundant with Jinger and Jill’s but boy was I wrong!! Amy’s revelations about Grandpa Duggar🤯 How she was used to further the show🤯 How she found evidence of what eventually put Josh in prison YEARS before it came out and she was gaslit and ignored?! Ohhhh I get so angry. Excuse my language but Amy really ripped Jim Bob a new one with this book.
Honestly, I thought it book would be redundant with Jinger and Jill’s but boy was I wrong!! Amy’s revelations about Grandpa Duggar🤯 How she was used to further the show🤯 How she found evidence of what eventually put Josh in prison YEARS before it came out and she was gaslit and ignored?! Ohhhh I get so angry. Excuse my language but Amy really ripped Jim Bob a new one with this book.
October 19, 2025
This book was exactly what I hoped it would be.
4.5 stars
4.5 stars
October 22, 2025
I was afraid Amy was going to use her Duggar name to get her own fame. However, she shared her own story about her childhood before delving into the Duggar scandals. I was heartbroken for her hurt but also thoroughly entertained with this book.
January 7, 2026
I just need to preface this review with the fact that I don’t rate memoirs less than 3 stars just because it feels wrong rating someone’s life story a 1 star but anyways.
Amy is definitely a victim of abuse but I feel like she was piggy backing off of the trauma of her cousins. She really did not add much insight to the Duggar household besides what’s already known. She also is clearly trying to coin a term “holy disrupter” throughout but I really don’t see how any of her actions helped her cousins through the trauma they endured. It just felt like she was centering herself.
With that aside, I also think this was just a poorly written book. It oscillated from self help, to sermon, to memoir, to the random ending about motherhood and listing off signs of emotional abuse. It just felt like she was trying to reach a page count. I do think this could have been a tell all episode on a talk show and not a book.
Also, why did she casually drop that her grandpa was a predator after listing off a bunch of positive personality traits or why did she not utter a bad word about her grandma when she never intervened. I think we should equally and adequately condemn all the predators in this book. It felt like cherry picking to fit her narrative.
Amy is definitely a victim of abuse but I feel like she was piggy backing off of the trauma of her cousins. She really did not add much insight to the Duggar household besides what’s already known. She also is clearly trying to coin a term “holy disrupter” throughout but I really don’t see how any of her actions helped her cousins through the trauma they endured. It just felt like she was centering herself.
With that aside, I also think this was just a poorly written book. It oscillated from self help, to sermon, to memoir, to the random ending about motherhood and listing off signs of emotional abuse. It just felt like she was trying to reach a page count. I do think this could have been a tell all episode on a talk show and not a book.
Also, why did she casually drop that her grandpa was a predator after listing off a bunch of positive personality traits or why did she not utter a bad word about her grandma when she never intervened. I think we should equally and adequately condemn all the predators in this book. It felt like cherry picking to fit her narrative.
October 29, 2025
Amy Duggar King is an amazingly brave and resilient person and I’m glad she penned her memoir. When other people have had the chance to edit you for the masses for years, you’re more than owed a book contract. Amy never got paid for being on her family’s show — the only reason many things in this book didn’t shock me is because I’ve read two other Duggar memoirs.
November 13, 2025
I don't love leaving bad reviews on memoirs but this one was extremely immature and honestly insufferable.
November 6, 2025
As someone who grew up watching the Duggars, I've always had an interest for the familial habits that caused the family to act the way they did. Amy doesn't hold back as she unveils what happened in her family and behind the scenes of the show. Not only a powerful statement of breaking free from an abusive family but advice for others on how to do so. I was horrified about some of the stories. Her narration was lively and it was sad to hear her voice break in some of the passages as she spoke through tears. The chapter where she teared down the IBLM beliefs with passages from the bible that contradicted them, queen.
November 8, 2025
I really liked this book and could relate to it and I very much appreciate her standing up for what she knows to be right
October 16, 2025
3.5 stars. It was pretty interesting to hear her background, her parents tumultuous relationship, her lack of pay for her work on the family reality show, and how she reacted to the family scandal with her pedophile cousin. The amount of times she said “Holy Disruptor” made me think she’s going on a national tour to spread this hashtag at a series of women empowerment conferences. But otherwise, it’s a fast read and was pretty good. More telling about the Duggar family than Jinger Duggar Vuolo’s book by far.
January 30, 2026
this is the third book by a Duggar that I have read... And it is my least favorite
as a colleague of mine has said this book lacks identity and I would say that to be true. did the book want to have more of a spiritual focus? didn't want to be a tell-all into the life of the Duggar family? was it a book where Amy used it as a part of therapy? it's hard to say and know.
of all the books I have read, the one that resonates most with me is Jinger Duggar's.. because her journey of faith and religion is very similar to mine. to be honest here, I wasn't even sure at the end where Amy Duggar King stands with the Lord despite quoting scripture. but do you know where I know she stands? she really doesn't like Jim Bob Duggar. Not that I blame her, he seems sleazy.....Josh, oh that's a whole other level of depravity.
Don't expect new details on anything. and it is boring at parts, repetitive at others .....I'd skip this one I will confess
as a colleague of mine has said this book lacks identity and I would say that to be true. did the book want to have more of a spiritual focus? didn't want to be a tell-all into the life of the Duggar family? was it a book where Amy used it as a part of therapy? it's hard to say and know.
of all the books I have read, the one that resonates most with me is Jinger Duggar's.. because her journey of faith and religion is very similar to mine. to be honest here, I wasn't even sure at the end where Amy Duggar King stands with the Lord despite quoting scripture. but do you know where I know she stands? she really doesn't like Jim Bob Duggar. Not that I blame her, he seems sleazy.....Josh, oh that's a whole other level of depravity.
Don't expect new details on anything. and it is boring at parts, repetitive at others .....I'd skip this one I will confess
January 12, 2026
This family infatuates me and Jim Bob Duggar is a fucking creep
January 1, 2026
Take a shot everytime Amy calls herself a holy disruptor while not disrupting a single thing. This was a hot mess and badly in need of either an editor or a ghost writer. I had no idea where in time each part of the book was. Amy herself read the audio book and that was rough. She stumbled over words, had odd timing, teared up, was angry, and at times spoke very loud and fast. Something that stood out as so strange to me was when Amy claimed to confront Josh Duggar and demanded to know why he hadn’t abused her. I know that everyone has different responses to trauma but that was a level of bizarre I can’t wrap my head around.
January 27, 2026
An absolute must-read, especially if you've read her cousins' books. This books pieces together what their books began. Amy is open and raw with her life's story. I imagine there's many in her family on both sides who are angry with her over her book. I see this as a fantastic tool to healing a lifetime of hurt. Towards the end you begin to see Joel 2:25 play out, as redemption takes shape.
January 13, 2026
Honestly, this book was hard to read. It was heartbreaking to see how much pain the author endured from her grandfather and father, who walked in extreme self-indulgence, and her uncle, who elevated the man-made rules of IBLP over the salvation found in Christ. She provides some biblical analysis, but much of the action steps are man-centered, which makes the true hope for healing found in the gospel hard to see.
January 9, 2026
I really enjoyed this heartfelt book. Amy was so honest and emotional talking about the hard times she has endured in her family. She stands up for what is right.
January 7, 2026
A 3 day listen and wow does @JennaT know how to recommend books to me.
My text to her mid Chapter 5:
Cousin Amy was speaking directly to me. Confronting the trauma patterns and repeating themselves but we the power to fight against negativity and dysfunction. The cycle ends with me. Each person must bear the weight of their own decisions. Work to change the behaviors that have been past down. I’ve dug deep within myself to break these barriers. I want to encourage you to take a hard look at your own life. It’s time to be disruptive.
COUSIN AMY have you been watching my life from afar?? Words hit straight to my soul.
My text to her mid Chapter 5:
Cousin Amy was speaking directly to me. Confronting the trauma patterns and repeating themselves but we the power to fight against negativity and dysfunction. The cycle ends with me. Each person must bear the weight of their own decisions. Work to change the behaviors that have been past down. I’ve dug deep within myself to break these barriers. I want to encourage you to take a hard look at your own life. It’s time to be disruptive.
COUSIN AMY have you been watching my life from afar?? Words hit straight to my soul.
October 31, 2025
As I finish this audiobook, I’m left with admiration for Amy Duggar King for her authenticity, her courage and her willingness to share even her most painful moments with such honesty and vulnerability.
Amy’s story is a sobering reminder of how “reality” TV can distort the truth. In telling her story, she pulls back the curtain on the Duggar family’s carefully crafted image, revealing the heartbreaking contrast between what the world saw and what was really happening behind closed doors. Her account makes it painfully clear that the empire Jim Bob Duggar built was driven not by faith or family values, but by control, greed and selfishness at great cost to those closest to him.
Amy’s story is a sobering reminder of how “reality” TV can distort the truth. In telling her story, she pulls back the curtain on the Duggar family’s carefully crafted image, revealing the heartbreaking contrast between what the world saw and what was really happening behind closed doors. Her account makes it painfully clear that the empire Jim Bob Duggar built was driven not by faith or family values, but by control, greed and selfishness at great cost to those closest to him.
February 21, 2026
When she told her story it was interesting but it felt like she tried to make it a memoir, self help and religious education book all in one.
October 15, 2025
Well done! My heart breaks for the way she was treated but am so glad she found her strength
Displaying 1 - 30 of 419 reviews