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Jay's Journal
Jay was a sweet, bright high school student who cared about his grades and his friends. He had ambitions. He was happy. And he thought he could handle anything.
He was wrong.
When Jay falls in with a crowd that's dabbling in drugs and the occult, he finds himself in over his head and doing things he never thought possible. Fascinated by the dark arts and in love with a dangerous girl, Jay falls deeper and deeper into a life he no longer recognizes...and sees no way out.
He was wrong.
When Jay falls in with a crowd that's dabbling in drugs and the occult, he finds himself in over his head and doing things he never thought possible. Fascinated by the dark arts and in love with a dangerous girl, Jay falls deeper and deeper into a life he no longer recognizes...and sees no way out.
192 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1979
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8182 people want to read
About the author
Beatrice Sparks
21 books1,402 followersBeatrice Sparks was an American therapist and Mormon youth counselor who was known for producing books purporting to be the 'real diaries' of troubled teenagers. The books deal with topical issues such as drug abuse, Satanism, teenage pregnancy or AIDS, and are presented as cautionary tales. Although Sparks always presented herself as merely the discoverer and editor of the diaries, records at the U.S. Copyright Office show that in fact she was listed as the sole author for all but two of them.
Sparks began working with teenagers in 1955, after attending the University of California at Los Angeles and Brigham Young University. She has worked as a music therapist at Utah State Mental Hospital and taught continuing education courses at BYU.
Critics have called the precise extent of Sparks' qualifications and experience into question. The editorial credit on some of the diaries published by Sparks identifies her as "Dr Beatrice Sparks, PhD". However, when journalist Aileen Pace Nilsen interviewed Sparks for School Library Journal in 1979, she was unable to find any confirmation of where or when Sparks earned her doctorate. Nilsen also wrote that Sparks was "vague about specifics" when asked about her counseling qualifications and professional experience.
Sparks said that her experience working with troubled adolescents made her want to produce cautionary tales that would keep other teens from falling into the same traps. Her first work, Go Ask Alice, was published under the byline 'Anonymous' in 1971.
Sparks began working with teenagers in 1955, after attending the University of California at Los Angeles and Brigham Young University. She has worked as a music therapist at Utah State Mental Hospital and taught continuing education courses at BYU.
Critics have called the precise extent of Sparks' qualifications and experience into question. The editorial credit on some of the diaries published by Sparks identifies her as "Dr Beatrice Sparks, PhD". However, when journalist Aileen Pace Nilsen interviewed Sparks for School Library Journal in 1979, she was unable to find any confirmation of where or when Sparks earned her doctorate. Nilsen also wrote that Sparks was "vague about specifics" when asked about her counseling qualifications and professional experience.
Sparks said that her experience working with troubled adolescents made her want to produce cautionary tales that would keep other teens from falling into the same traps. Her first work, Go Ask Alice, was published under the byline 'Anonymous' in 1971.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 689 reviews
February 9, 2010
I probably should add a "Mormon Propaganda" shelf for this book.
Alden Barrett was a sensitive young man, a leader on his high school debate team, a poet (his own poetry is on his headstone) with a genius level IQ who suffered from depression and committed suicide at the age of 16. He was also politically left-leaning and against the Vietnam War, unforgiveable in a small Utah town. Since that wasn't interesting enough for Beatrice Sparks, she took excerpts from only 21 of Alden's 226 journal entries and made shit up for the rest. The shit she made up was that "Jay" (Alden) was deeply embroiled in Satanism, mutilating animals and drinking their blood, engaging in rough sex from which his girlfriend emerged with cuts and a black eye, and stealing prescription drugs. Teen depression apparently wasn't interesting enough, and Sparks had already published a novel on teen drug abuse, so Sparks fabricated the premise that Alden and his friends were involved in Satan worship. Alden's brother Scott published a book refuting Sparks's treatment of Alden's journal. I think it sold about 100 copies and is no longer in print. People would rather believe Sparks's fake story. Alden's mother, having heard about "Dr." Sparks and Go Ask Alice, entrusted Alden's journal to Beatrice, hoping Alden's story would heighten awareness of teen depression, which was not really recognized in the 1960's. Instead, awareness of Satan worship was heightened, to the point that, once local people found out Jay's Journal was about Alden, Marcella Barrett and her family were vilified and hounded and shunned by her good Xtian neighbors and fellow church members.
Sparks commits many offenses here. First has to be the betrayal of Marcella Barrett's trust in making the story of "Jay" completely different from Alden's true story. Sparks managed to demonize young Mr. Barrett, and to this day, many wild rumors circulate around Alden's home town of Pleasant Grove, Utah; so much so that the Barretts' marriage ended and they had to move away, all so Sparks could make a few bucks.
Sprinkled liberally through the book are Mormon platitudes and, because the protagonist and the author are both Mormon, much more overt preaching than in Go Ask Alice. "Jay" recounts counseling sessions with youth leaders. The last line of the book is "Tomorrow I'm definitely going to call the Bishop (local ecclesiastical leader, similar to a parish priest or pastor.)" The afterword stated that, for "Jay," there was no tomorrow--he was found dead by self-inflicted gunshot wound that very night. Big surprise--this isn't in the journal either.
Sparks said she "fleshed out" the story using interviews with Alden's friends and family members, an assertion Scott flatly contradicts. He was the one who discovered Alden's lifeless body, and he was never interviewed by Sparks or anybody else. Unfortunately, several of Alden's friends died tragic deaths in their later teens and early 20's, most of them having to do with motorized vehicles, not Satanism; however, people will believe what they choose to, so these deaths served to fan the flames of rumor about the occultic dabbling. I guess it's plausible that Stan could take over somebody while they're driving and cause them to slam into an abutment. Without many living witnesses, aside from Scott, people swallow this book like Jell-o salad.
Sparks's final offense is in not being a very skilled writer. Her voice and style are similar in both Jay's Journal and Go Ask Alice, something I didn't notice as a teen reading the books, but upon revisiting the books in a YA lit class, the fabrications were obvious. I have not read any of her other "real diaries" (I'm not a masochist, after all); one is about an anorexic girl, another about a teenaged girl pregnant out of wedlock, and I don't remember what other issues she's written about; but I hear from those who have read them that the voice and style are similar in her other books as well. Supposedly these stories were culled from her experiences as a clinical psychologist or something, but the only information I can find on her is that she has a degree in music therapy, which doesn't exactly qualify her to work in clinical psychology. My guess is that she had a church calling as a leader in the Mormon youth group and padded her resume from that.
I read this book for the first time while still a practicing Mormon. The one scene that stands out for me, because so many of my Mormon friends pointed it out as validating Mormon dogma, was the scene where a demon introducing himself as "Raoul" appears in "Jay's" bedroom. Wide-eyed, my friends would gasp, "See? The Church is true!" because Raoul told the story of the war in heaven exactly the way Mormon teens are taught it in Seminary. Even then, cognitive dissonance was taking root. My question was, "why would a demon show up in a kid's bedroom to validate stuff he'd been taught in church?"
Sparks's exploitation of the Barretts and her sullying of Alden's name and reputation to fatten her bank account are unforgiveable.
Alden Barrett was a sensitive young man, a leader on his high school debate team, a poet (his own poetry is on his headstone) with a genius level IQ who suffered from depression and committed suicide at the age of 16. He was also politically left-leaning and against the Vietnam War, unforgiveable in a small Utah town. Since that wasn't interesting enough for Beatrice Sparks, she took excerpts from only 21 of Alden's 226 journal entries and made shit up for the rest. The shit she made up was that "Jay" (Alden) was deeply embroiled in Satanism, mutilating animals and drinking their blood, engaging in rough sex from which his girlfriend emerged with cuts and a black eye, and stealing prescription drugs. Teen depression apparently wasn't interesting enough, and Sparks had already published a novel on teen drug abuse, so Sparks fabricated the premise that Alden and his friends were involved in Satan worship. Alden's brother Scott published a book refuting Sparks's treatment of Alden's journal. I think it sold about 100 copies and is no longer in print. People would rather believe Sparks's fake story. Alden's mother, having heard about "Dr." Sparks and Go Ask Alice, entrusted Alden's journal to Beatrice, hoping Alden's story would heighten awareness of teen depression, which was not really recognized in the 1960's. Instead, awareness of Satan worship was heightened, to the point that, once local people found out Jay's Journal was about Alden, Marcella Barrett and her family were vilified and hounded and shunned by her good Xtian neighbors and fellow church members.
Sparks commits many offenses here. First has to be the betrayal of Marcella Barrett's trust in making the story of "Jay" completely different from Alden's true story. Sparks managed to demonize young Mr. Barrett, and to this day, many wild rumors circulate around Alden's home town of Pleasant Grove, Utah; so much so that the Barretts' marriage ended and they had to move away, all so Sparks could make a few bucks.
Sprinkled liberally through the book are Mormon platitudes and, because the protagonist and the author are both Mormon, much more overt preaching than in Go Ask Alice. "Jay" recounts counseling sessions with youth leaders. The last line of the book is "Tomorrow I'm definitely going to call the Bishop (local ecclesiastical leader, similar to a parish priest or pastor.)" The afterword stated that, for "Jay," there was no tomorrow--he was found dead by self-inflicted gunshot wound that very night. Big surprise--this isn't in the journal either.
Sparks said she "fleshed out" the story using interviews with Alden's friends and family members, an assertion Scott flatly contradicts. He was the one who discovered Alden's lifeless body, and he was never interviewed by Sparks or anybody else. Unfortunately, several of Alden's friends died tragic deaths in their later teens and early 20's, most of them having to do with motorized vehicles, not Satanism; however, people will believe what they choose to, so these deaths served to fan the flames of rumor about the occultic dabbling. I guess it's plausible that Stan could take over somebody while they're driving and cause them to slam into an abutment. Without many living witnesses, aside from Scott, people swallow this book like Jell-o salad.
Sparks's final offense is in not being a very skilled writer. Her voice and style are similar in both Jay's Journal and Go Ask Alice, something I didn't notice as a teen reading the books, but upon revisiting the books in a YA lit class, the fabrications were obvious. I have not read any of her other "real diaries" (I'm not a masochist, after all); one is about an anorexic girl, another about a teenaged girl pregnant out of wedlock, and I don't remember what other issues she's written about; but I hear from those who have read them that the voice and style are similar in her other books as well. Supposedly these stories were culled from her experiences as a clinical psychologist or something, but the only information I can find on her is that she has a degree in music therapy, which doesn't exactly qualify her to work in clinical psychology. My guess is that she had a church calling as a leader in the Mormon youth group and padded her resume from that.
I read this book for the first time while still a practicing Mormon. The one scene that stands out for me, because so many of my Mormon friends pointed it out as validating Mormon dogma, was the scene where a demon introducing himself as "Raoul" appears in "Jay's" bedroom. Wide-eyed, my friends would gasp, "See? The Church is true!" because Raoul told the story of the war in heaven exactly the way Mormon teens are taught it in Seminary. Even then, cognitive dissonance was taking root. My question was, "why would a demon show up in a kid's bedroom to validate stuff he'd been taught in church?"
Sparks's exploitation of the Barretts and her sullying of Alden's name and reputation to fatten her bank account are unforgiveable.
January 17, 2008
There is a possibility -- and not a faint one -- that this is the stupidest book ever written. To begin with, as with all Ms. Sparks' books, she did not "edit" the book; unless there happened to be some central office in Pueblo, Colorado or somewhere, teaching all the teenagers of the day to write in precisely the same voice with precisely the same stylistic tics, she wrote it herself, as any seventh-grader (as I was when I read this book) can glean from a three-second comparison of this one to Go Ask Alice.
Second, the tone of this book is hysterical, and I don't mean that in the sense of "funny." I mean hysterical. That's right, parents -- you'd all better watch out or your kids will be taken from you -- by SATAN!! I mean, honestly. As though the drug hysteria she spread in Go Ask Alice wasn't bad enough?
This book may be good to read while drunk, but I wouldn't swear to it.
Second, the tone of this book is hysterical, and I don't mean that in the sense of "funny." I mean hysterical. That's right, parents -- you'd all better watch out or your kids will be taken from you -- by SATAN!! I mean, honestly. As though the drug hysteria she spread in Go Ask Alice wasn't bad enough?
This book may be good to read while drunk, but I wouldn't swear to it.
June 19, 2013
This book was based on the journals of Alden Barrett, a teenager who killed himself at 16 1/2. The following information is more interesting than the book itself.
"Two years later, his grieving parents contacted a psychologist in Provo, Dr. Beatrice Sparks, editor of the allegedly "real-life" journal 'Go Ask Alice,' who told them she would edit and publish Alden's journal as a warning to other teenagers suffering from depression. The book's publication in 1979, as 'Jay's Journal,' shocked his family and their entire town, because of its depiction of Alden as someone who had gotten deeply involved in a bizarre occult Satanic group. The identifying details had also not been changed enough, so people in the community easily figured out "Jay's" true identity. It was later discovered that only 21 of the 212 journal entries were actually Alden's, and that the Satanic entries were from other teenagers Dr. Sparks had worked with, combined with things she had written herself. The real Alden's journal had never even mentioned such things. Because of the community reaction to what they believed to be Alden's actual journal, his family was forced to move, his parents eventually divorced, and his grave was vandalized several times, as well as being stolen and then returned facing in the opposite direction. In 1997 Alden's brother Scott published a book which he hoped to set the record straight, 'A Place in the Sun: The Truth Behind Jay's Journal,' which was later turned into a rock opera by the Utah band Grain." (bio by: Carrie-Anne)
"Two years later, his grieving parents contacted a psychologist in Provo, Dr. Beatrice Sparks, editor of the allegedly "real-life" journal 'Go Ask Alice,' who told them she would edit and publish Alden's journal as a warning to other teenagers suffering from depression. The book's publication in 1979, as 'Jay's Journal,' shocked his family and their entire town, because of its depiction of Alden as someone who had gotten deeply involved in a bizarre occult Satanic group. The identifying details had also not been changed enough, so people in the community easily figured out "Jay's" true identity. It was later discovered that only 21 of the 212 journal entries were actually Alden's, and that the Satanic entries were from other teenagers Dr. Sparks had worked with, combined with things she had written herself. The real Alden's journal had never even mentioned such things. Because of the community reaction to what they believed to be Alden's actual journal, his family was forced to move, his parents eventually divorced, and his grave was vandalized several times, as well as being stolen and then returned facing in the opposite direction. In 1997 Alden's brother Scott published a book which he hoped to set the record straight, 'A Place in the Sun: The Truth Behind Jay's Journal,' which was later turned into a rock opera by the Utah band Grain." (bio by: Carrie-Anne)
September 2, 2018
Your enjoyment of this book depends on your tolerance for reading laughably bad Satanic Panic literature written by underqualified therapists who misrepresent their credentials and exploit real life dead children in order to make a quick buck. My tolerance for that shit is zero.
February 11, 2008
I'd wanted to read this since I first heard about it--Go Ask Alice, now with more SATANISM!--but it was awful. Unlike GAA, this one has an actual kid's journal behind it--but the real one had nothing about the occult in it. Sparks took a much sadder, more valuable story about depression and instead has the devil make him do it.
It doesn't even have the vague readability/camp value of Go Ask Alice. It's just sad. Especially sad is that I'm certain the editor/author really believes in occult powers and evil demons, and I know the book is presented to poor Mormon kids as fact.
I think I'll just throw it away, unless one of you wants it.
It doesn't even have the vague readability/camp value of Go Ask Alice. It's just sad. Especially sad is that I'm certain the editor/author really believes in occult powers and evil demons, and I know the book is presented to poor Mormon kids as fact.
I think I'll just throw it away, unless one of you wants it.
September 29, 2007
Oh Beatrice, if only Go Ask Alice wasn't soooooo goooooood. But your "editing" of Jay's Journal, quite frankly, SUCKED ASS. Plus now I'm scared that just by having read the book I am also a devil worshipper, and I can't turn out the lights because of the little trolls Jay kept whining about are coming to take my soul too.
I'm a little lost lamb. baaa.
I'm a little lost lamb. baaa.
August 25, 2016
This one is hilariously bad. An obvious work of fiction, Jay's Journal describes the downward spiral of a teenage drug addict/Satanist who descends into madness & finally kills himself. Published in the late '70s, when an unfounded fear of Satanism was plaguing middle-class Americans, the book played off these concerns & became almost as successful as editor/Mormon youth counselor Beatrice Sparks' other "diary," Go Ask Alice. The real Jay, Alden Barrett had committed suicide, but there's no evidence that he had ties to occult groups, suggesting that Sparks wrote the entries dealing with Satanism herself. Of course, anyone who knows anything about drugs & teenagers will realize that most of the book was written by someone who doesn't.
March 4, 2011
Lemme just get one thing straight to some people out here. The main chracter, Jay, WAS NOT ADDICTED TO DRUGS.
Sure he was a user during some moments of his life, but he was not addicted.
SO I am going to talk about some things that happened, o occures, or came up, or annoyed me from this book. This is a lesson. Not a review, but a lesson.
First thing to know. Do NOT immatate the rituals done in this book. If you do(and you're human) than you are just CRAZY. Completely insane. If you ever decide to do the rituals done in this book I say to you, "Are you high? Do you have problems with your head or were you just dropped on your head when you were a baby?" That is how insane these rituals are.
The fact that people have evn thought of doing the rituals in thefirst place is just insane. They are nasty and disturbing and just plain wrong.
So the lesson one is: Do not perform rituals that appear in this book.
First Pause! One time in the book, Jay was acting really perverted and it made me laugh. Really hard. That is all.
Lesson two: Do NOT fall for anyone who happnes to be some-what similar to Tinea or Debbie. Tina and Debbie are some freaky girls who Jay happens to like for who-knows-what. Personally, I think they are just stupid and annoying and they should hide in a hole some where so no one can see them.
Let's pause for a moment and talk about something that really annoyed me in this book. It's a very stupid reason to be annoyed, but it made me VERY annoyed.
I am annoyed by how many times Jay says the word "neat" in his journal. Because of this book, I really hate that word. I JUST REALLY HATE IT. The word annoys me now. See what this book caused!????
Last lesson: Don't do drugs. Although it is pretty obvious that drugs(illegal drugs that is) are bad for you, I am telling you this now, don't do drugs. Or I'll find you for not respecting my authority.
The last thing I wanna talk about is how Jay says things some times. For example, when y writes something in his journal, it makes him or other people seem gay. Like actually gay. Like male and male. Female and female. No offence to anyone but it's true.
One time Jay was describing a guy named Pete and he made it seem like he really liked Pete in some way that only he and Pete could discuss together.
Or is it just me? I dunno. I feel awkward with myself right now.
Overall, this book is disturbing yet stupid at some times. Other time it is annoying and other time it made me laugh.I give this book two stars because it made me feel tired. And usually when a book makes you feel tired, it probably kinda sucks. ANd that is todays lessong. CLASS DISMISSED!
P.S. I raelly hates wangas. I didn't know what the hell they were, so I searched it up online. I got so many different definitions like Austrailian tribes, a cheek, math terms? So if ANYONE out there knows what the hell a wanga is(how it is used in the book, not just some random definiton that doesn't match the book), gimme a call. Or in this case, a message or comment.
Sure he was a user during some moments of his life, but he was not addicted.
SO I am going to talk about some things that happened, o occures, or came up, or annoyed me from this book. This is a lesson. Not a review, but a lesson.
First thing to know. Do NOT immatate the rituals done in this book. If you do(and you're human) than you are just CRAZY. Completely insane. If you ever decide to do the rituals done in this book I say to you, "Are you high? Do you have problems with your head or were you just dropped on your head when you were a baby?" That is how insane these rituals are.
The fact that people have evn thought of doing the rituals in thefirst place is just insane. They are nasty and disturbing and just plain wrong.
So the lesson one is: Do not perform rituals that appear in this book.
First Pause! One time in the book, Jay was acting really perverted and it made me laugh. Really hard. That is all.
Lesson two: Do NOT fall for anyone who happnes to be some-what similar to Tinea or Debbie. Tina and Debbie are some freaky girls who Jay happens to like for who-knows-what. Personally, I think they are just stupid and annoying and they should hide in a hole some where so no one can see them.
Let's pause for a moment and talk about something that really annoyed me in this book. It's a very stupid reason to be annoyed, but it made me VERY annoyed.
I am annoyed by how many times Jay says the word "neat" in his journal. Because of this book, I really hate that word. I JUST REALLY HATE IT. The word annoys me now. See what this book caused!????
Last lesson: Don't do drugs. Although it is pretty obvious that drugs(illegal drugs that is) are bad for you, I am telling you this now, don't do drugs. Or I'll find you for not respecting my authority.
The last thing I wanna talk about is how Jay says things some times. For example, when y writes something in his journal, it makes him or other people seem gay. Like actually gay. Like male and male. Female and female. No offence to anyone but it's true.
One time Jay was describing a guy named Pete and he made it seem like he really liked Pete in some way that only he and Pete could discuss together.
Or is it just me? I dunno. I feel awkward with myself right now.
Overall, this book is disturbing yet stupid at some times. Other time it is annoying and other time it made me laugh.I give this book two stars because it made me feel tired. And usually when a book makes you feel tired, it probably kinda sucks. ANd that is todays lessong. CLASS DISMISSED!
P.S. I raelly hates wangas. I didn't know what the hell they were, so I searched it up online. I got so many different definitions like Austrailian tribes, a cheek, math terms? So if ANYONE out there knows what the hell a wanga is(how it is used in the book, not just some random definiton that doesn't match the book), gimme a call. Or in this case, a message or comment.
December 22, 2014
I have loved all of these Anonymous books, so when I saw all the bad reviews of this one I was sure everyone was wrong and I was going to love it. Oh. Oh man. Was I ever the wrong one. Let me just tell you that this is the diary of a 15/16 year old boy who writes like this:
"Tomorrow during lunch period Mom's going to pick me up and take me to the bank, then to pick up my car! MY CAR! It's like saying MY WORLD! It's a clean little critter. Green as a little fat toad and just as cute!"
Now I don't know about you, but most boys I know would not get this excited about having a green Volkswagen Bug as their first car. Most, if not all, boys would be embarrassed and claim it was their sister's. Hell, I'm a girl and even I would be embarrassed to be seen driving one. He continues to refer to 'Toad' and how much he loves him throughout the rest of the book.
The writing was one big giant cheese fest. Jay would write about feelings and deep emotional ideas and poems. Ew. This was not what I expected from a teenage boy in the 70's who's into the occult. I expected Charles Manson type writing, not....not this:
"Man, the sun is shining like it's just been let out of a dark cave, or is it me shining inside myself because I've come out. Anyway, wow! Wowwie! Wow! Golly gee I'm glad I'm me, there's no one else I'd rather be. I smile on every bird and tree. Life is a ball. I'm in love with me!"
And no, the whole coming out thing is not him being gay (although I sometimes wondered because of the way he talked about his two bff's Brad and Dell), I've literally no idea what that was about. Sometimes things just stopped making sense in this book.
"I, great king of the hill, Jack and Jill (who might fall down before the year, or even the day is over and break my crown), am now completely registered in HIGH SCHOOL! APPLE HILL HIGH SCHOOL, WATCH OUT! DELL, BRAD, AND JAY, THE THREE NEPHITES ARE HERE!"
Maybe I was just burnt out from reading this, but did the beginning of that sentence make any sense?
One of my pet peeves in writing is when a character repeats a word three times. Literally every five pages had something like this:
"Being grounded is giving me time to learn the Christmas script but it's so, so, so boring!"
That's my biggest, biggest, biggest pet peeve! THIS WHOLE BOOK MADE ME ANGRY.
Honestly, the best part of this book was Raul.
"Tomorrow during lunch period Mom's going to pick me up and take me to the bank, then to pick up my car! MY CAR! It's like saying MY WORLD! It's a clean little critter. Green as a little fat toad and just as cute!"
Now I don't know about you, but most boys I know would not get this excited about having a green Volkswagen Bug as their first car. Most, if not all, boys would be embarrassed and claim it was their sister's. Hell, I'm a girl and even I would be embarrassed to be seen driving one. He continues to refer to 'Toad' and how much he loves him throughout the rest of the book.
The writing was one big giant cheese fest. Jay would write about feelings and deep emotional ideas and poems. Ew. This was not what I expected from a teenage boy in the 70's who's into the occult. I expected Charles Manson type writing, not....not this:
"Man, the sun is shining like it's just been let out of a dark cave, or is it me shining inside myself because I've come out. Anyway, wow! Wowwie! Wow! Golly gee I'm glad I'm me, there's no one else I'd rather be. I smile on every bird and tree. Life is a ball. I'm in love with me!"
And no, the whole coming out thing is not him being gay (although I sometimes wondered because of the way he talked about his two bff's Brad and Dell), I've literally no idea what that was about. Sometimes things just stopped making sense in this book.
"I, great king of the hill, Jack and Jill (who might fall down before the year, or even the day is over and break my crown), am now completely registered in HIGH SCHOOL! APPLE HILL HIGH SCHOOL, WATCH OUT! DELL, BRAD, AND JAY, THE THREE NEPHITES ARE HERE!"
Maybe I was just burnt out from reading this, but did the beginning of that sentence make any sense?
One of my pet peeves in writing is when a character repeats a word three times. Literally every five pages had something like this:
"Being grounded is giving me time to learn the Christmas script but it's so, so, so boring!"
That's my biggest, biggest, biggest pet peeve! THIS WHOLE BOOK MADE ME ANGRY.
Honestly, the best part of this book was Raul.
March 1, 2008
I read this when I was in high-school and remember being so engrossed in the story I could barely put it down. It's a favorite with many of my students (once they get past the initial girlfriend plot and into the second witchcraft one). I feel as though I need to read it again to update my initial reaction. Especially knowing that most of the story is fabricated....
February 24, 2014
Color me angry. I bought this book a year ago at Barnes & Noble from the YA section. Its description on the back of the book sounded interesting, if flamboyant: this is the journal of a boy who got in over his head with drugs and the occult before killing himself. All right, I'm interested.
So today, 23 February 2014, I finally picked it up to read. I was moving along quite quickly, being that the journal format leaves a lot of white space on the pages. But I stopped at page 100, ready to put it down for the day, before skipping to the back to read the excerpt from Sparks' other book, Go Ask Alice, which the cover and inside strongly want we, the readers, to go out and buy. This didn't feel right to me. I half-jokingly described to my room mate on his way out to work, that the book in my hand was the product of some woman who was making a living by exploiting the pain and deaths of troubled youths. And I was sort of right. When I put the book down all of 20 minutes ago, I went to the internet to see what I could dig up in regards to what edits were made. The author, after all, stated clearly in the beginning that she had done interviews with friends and family to fill out what might have been missing from "Jay's" own account.
And, if you've read any other reviews on this page, you won't be shocked to find out that the woman did practically no interviews, especially not with anyone of import, and that not just a few pieces, but the great bulk of the book is all fabricated bullshit. According to Wikipedia, the woman used only 25 of 212 (the number varies depending on source, but that's about the ratio) journal entries from "Jay", and just...well, invented the rest. I saw one person on here say she got a lot of the occult material from clients of hers, but that is beside the point. I, the consumer, was lied to about the content I was paying money for. I, the intellectual, was being lied to about the content I was consuming. The entire Barrett family were lied to, and in fact largely destroyed by the lies and character smears in this book. As I said to my room mate: Beatrice Sparks was simply making money by laying waste to the reputation of a dead boy.
I can understand something of such low journalistic integrity being published way-back-when, before the internet, before you could expose liars in a matter of moments. But why is this still around? For god's sake, my copy was printed in 2010. 2010! This is inexcusable.
And here, don't I feel like a jackass for reading the lines about levitation and auras and thinking, "well of course there's some logical explanation that "Jay" simply didn't see." There was nothing to logically examine, of course! The bitch made the whole damned thing up! Does anyone else wonder if she has trouble sleeping at night? Because I bet she sleeps like a fucking baby.
[Edit: I see now from her mini-bio that Sparks is no longer among the living. Thank god for that.]
So today, 23 February 2014, I finally picked it up to read. I was moving along quite quickly, being that the journal format leaves a lot of white space on the pages. But I stopped at page 100, ready to put it down for the day, before skipping to the back to read the excerpt from Sparks' other book, Go Ask Alice, which the cover and inside strongly want we, the readers, to go out and buy. This didn't feel right to me. I half-jokingly described to my room mate on his way out to work, that the book in my hand was the product of some woman who was making a living by exploiting the pain and deaths of troubled youths. And I was sort of right. When I put the book down all of 20 minutes ago, I went to the internet to see what I could dig up in regards to what edits were made. The author, after all, stated clearly in the beginning that she had done interviews with friends and family to fill out what might have been missing from "Jay's" own account.
And, if you've read any other reviews on this page, you won't be shocked to find out that the woman did practically no interviews, especially not with anyone of import, and that not just a few pieces, but the great bulk of the book is all fabricated bullshit. According to Wikipedia, the woman used only 25 of 212 (the number varies depending on source, but that's about the ratio) journal entries from "Jay", and just...well, invented the rest. I saw one person on here say she got a lot of the occult material from clients of hers, but that is beside the point. I, the consumer, was lied to about the content I was paying money for. I, the intellectual, was being lied to about the content I was consuming. The entire Barrett family were lied to, and in fact largely destroyed by the lies and character smears in this book. As I said to my room mate: Beatrice Sparks was simply making money by laying waste to the reputation of a dead boy.
I can understand something of such low journalistic integrity being published way-back-when, before the internet, before you could expose liars in a matter of moments. But why is this still around? For god's sake, my copy was printed in 2010. 2010! This is inexcusable.
And here, don't I feel like a jackass for reading the lines about levitation and auras and thinking, "well of course there's some logical explanation that "Jay" simply didn't see." There was nothing to logically examine, of course! The bitch made the whole damned thing up! Does anyone else wonder if she has trouble sleeping at night? Because I bet she sleeps like a fucking baby.
[Edit: I see now from her mini-bio that Sparks is no longer among the living. Thank god for that.]
July 8, 2022
Oh. My. God.
So I listened to this because lately I’ve been interested in the Satanic Panic and am really excited to read Unmask Alice, which is about the author, Beatrice Sparks. I thought since I hadn’t even heard of this story before, reading it would be good background knowledge for the book I actually want to read.
About 30 seconds in I started laughing hysterically because it is so heavy handed with it’s “BE CAREFUL SATAN WANTS TO KILLLL YOUUUU” messaging, it has to be a joke. But it’s not. The emotional manipulation and explicit homophobia throughout the book is honestly so sad and depressing, I can’t believe that kids anywhere were subjected to it. I can’t comprehend the damage that must have been done to kids who picked this up or had an adult hand it to them, only to be told over and over again that they were bad or wrong for being/feeling different.
So I listened to this because lately I’ve been interested in the Satanic Panic and am really excited to read Unmask Alice, which is about the author, Beatrice Sparks. I thought since I hadn’t even heard of this story before, reading it would be good background knowledge for the book I actually want to read.
About 30 seconds in I started laughing hysterically because it is so heavy handed with it’s “BE CAREFUL SATAN WANTS TO KILLLL YOUUUU” messaging, it has to be a joke. But it’s not. The emotional manipulation and explicit homophobia throughout the book is honestly so sad and depressing, I can’t believe that kids anywhere were subjected to it. I can’t comprehend the damage that must have been done to kids who picked this up or had an adult hand it to them, only to be told over and over again that they were bad or wrong for being/feeling different.
October 25, 2021
I feel awful for the family of Alden Barrett, the actual teen whose diary was mangled by Beatrice Sparks into this nonsensical mash of cultural appropriation and cautionary tale about the dangers of drugs :(
https://www.frowl.org/worstbestseller...
https://www.frowl.org/worstbestseller...
December 25, 2024
Usually, I leave one-star reviews for books that I list as DNF.
However, I did finish this book. Unfortunately.
I urge everyone to research this book heavily, as I am thoroughly disgusted by the horrific context and history of this journal that Sparks has put together. The effects of this book have ruined the reputation and lives of the Barret family and have provided propaganda on the "promises" of witchcraft and Satan worship to teenagers and young adults alike.
What happened to Alden or "Jay" is inconceivable both in life and in death. I hope the Barret family is healed of the damage this book has inflicted on them.
However, I did finish this book. Unfortunately.
I urge everyone to research this book heavily, as I am thoroughly disgusted by the horrific context and history of this journal that Sparks has put together. The effects of this book have ruined the reputation and lives of the Barret family and have provided propaganda on the "promises" of witchcraft and Satan worship to teenagers and young adults alike.
What happened to Alden or "Jay" is inconceivable both in life and in death. I hope the Barret family is healed of the damage this book has inflicted on them.
May 19, 2008
I read this book in high school, I am pretty sure more than once. I just glanced through other's reviews of it, and it appears that if you read it in high school, you think it's awesome, and if you read it as an adult, you think it's totally stupid. So maybe my 4 star rating should be only for teenagers. Which none of my friends are. Man, I'm old.
It was about a Mormon kid (I recall that it never ever once specifically says he was Mormon, but man oh man, I sure seem to remember a bazillion references that made me think he was raised LDS) who falls into bad influences. He does drugs, then he gets into Satan worship. Then he kills himself. Kind of a downer towards the end, come to think of it. It's a re-print of his journal. (Note: The journal itself does not actually include a personal account of his suicide. That would be rather impossible now, wouldn't it?)
The book will make every Mormon teenager say "I will never do drugs and never skip church and never be bad and never skip scouts and never ever ever ever try Satan worship!!" They will be good and follow the prophet and go on a mission.
You know, I was sending this book to D.I. in the morning, but now I kinda wanna re-read it. I wonder if I will think it's dumb now.
It was about a Mormon kid (I recall that it never ever once specifically says he was Mormon, but man oh man, I sure seem to remember a bazillion references that made me think he was raised LDS) who falls into bad influences. He does drugs, then he gets into Satan worship. Then he kills himself. Kind of a downer towards the end, come to think of it. It's a re-print of his journal. (Note: The journal itself does not actually include a personal account of his suicide. That would be rather impossible now, wouldn't it?)
The book will make every Mormon teenager say "I will never do drugs and never skip church and never be bad and never skip scouts and never ever ever ever try Satan worship!!" They will be good and follow the prophet and go on a mission.
You know, I was sending this book to D.I. in the morning, but now I kinda wanna re-read it. I wonder if I will think it's dumb now.
August 2, 2024
The real Jay went to my high school (years before me) — those of us who went to high school in a pre-Internet age before 9/11 lived with (I assume) more myths and oral traditions than those today. Jay’s Journal was a frequent topic throughout Jr. High School and High School in the 1990s. Jay’s (Alden was his real name) dad had a medical practice on Main St. a baseball’s toss from the city library where my mom worked.
Stories about Jay ranged from the benign, “I knew someone who knew him” to the more sinister, “I know where Jay did rituals in this house/underground tunnel/etc.” The “Blue Moo” restaurant is the Purple Turtle in real life, still a staple of the small, actual city of Pleasant Grove, Utah.
Alden/“Jay’s” grave is in the PG cemetery, not too far from where my dad’s grave is, so I’m at the cemetery more often during the past few years. “Jay’s” gravestone has a chipped clay picture of him -- whoever did it forgot that when you are looking at a picture, Jay’s right side is our left (the journal mentions his death via gunshot to the right temple). There is also a lengthy poem written by Alden/“Jay” on the gravestone that misspells “Who’s” instead of “Whose” a few times but has a few tender lines, including one about being thirsty — there are often drinks placed at his grave as a result. I've left one many times myself, usually from Hart's or BJ's, two gas station convenience stores kitty-corner to each other just down the road from the PG cemetery. It was said around town that if you placed a drink at his grave, you’d be protected from the evil spirits or “Raul” etc.
I used to ride my bike past Alden’s house (the Barrett’s), but I never knocked on their door to bother them. When I was an office aide at Pleasant Grove High School, I confirmed that there are tunnels under the school, and some are accessible near the assembly hall stage. When I went down there it was your basic dusty, cobwebbed alley with dead mice, minor graffiti, a few chairs, other unknown items, etc. I didn’t have a flashlight so I didn’t go too far, plus it was a dicey place to navigate, devil-worshipping myths or not.
I was shocked years later when I learned how widespread Jay’s Journal was, across the nation and even the world. I thought it was a documented local legend — there were probably six or seven local legends that were given almost as much weight as Jay’s, including a so-called “Swinger” at an elementary school near Alden/“Jay’s/the Barrett’s home. Swinger in the sense of a swingset. Supposedly, a woman, usually dressed in all white (who was also an albino who'd only go out at night), preferred the tall, chain swingsets at nearby Valley View Elementary School. I saw the Swinger multiple times in person — or at least someone in all white swinging at night (who knows if it was a person pretending to be the swinger to continue the power of that myth). As such, that was the strongest local myth, with Jay being second, as far as my perspective is concerned.
I decided to re-read this book (which, when young, was considered contraband, and passed around in secret). The library copies were always missing, and one time someone put a different dust jacket on it and placed it elsewhere so that it would always be available when needed. I wanted to re-read it to prepare for the Rick Emerson book “Unmasked Alice” about the editor/author of Jay’s Journal and Go Ask Alice, Beatrice Sparks, being a deceptive charlatan who used only 20 or so actual journal entries of the 220+ in Jay’s Journal. She had other deceptions that really hurt the Barrett family after they entrusted her with their traumatic story about their son Alden in hopes that it would prevent similar occurrences for other families, but it looks like Jay’s Journal may have created even more problems during the drug and satanic panics of the 80s and 90s. I'll probably read this book one more time in my life, after I read the Rick Emerson book, which looks to be quite detailed.
Stories about Jay ranged from the benign, “I knew someone who knew him” to the more sinister, “I know where Jay did rituals in this house/underground tunnel/etc.” The “Blue Moo” restaurant is the Purple Turtle in real life, still a staple of the small, actual city of Pleasant Grove, Utah.
Alden/“Jay’s” grave is in the PG cemetery, not too far from where my dad’s grave is, so I’m at the cemetery more often during the past few years. “Jay’s” gravestone has a chipped clay picture of him -- whoever did it forgot that when you are looking at a picture, Jay’s right side is our left (the journal mentions his death via gunshot to the right temple). There is also a lengthy poem written by Alden/“Jay” on the gravestone that misspells “Who’s” instead of “Whose” a few times but has a few tender lines, including one about being thirsty — there are often drinks placed at his grave as a result. I've left one many times myself, usually from Hart's or BJ's, two gas station convenience stores kitty-corner to each other just down the road from the PG cemetery. It was said around town that if you placed a drink at his grave, you’d be protected from the evil spirits or “Raul” etc.
I used to ride my bike past Alden’s house (the Barrett’s), but I never knocked on their door to bother them. When I was an office aide at Pleasant Grove High School, I confirmed that there are tunnels under the school, and some are accessible near the assembly hall stage. When I went down there it was your basic dusty, cobwebbed alley with dead mice, minor graffiti, a few chairs, other unknown items, etc. I didn’t have a flashlight so I didn’t go too far, plus it was a dicey place to navigate, devil-worshipping myths or not.
I was shocked years later when I learned how widespread Jay’s Journal was, across the nation and even the world. I thought it was a documented local legend — there were probably six or seven local legends that were given almost as much weight as Jay’s, including a so-called “Swinger” at an elementary school near Alden/“Jay’s/the Barrett’s home. Swinger in the sense of a swingset. Supposedly, a woman, usually dressed in all white (who was also an albino who'd only go out at night), preferred the tall, chain swingsets at nearby Valley View Elementary School. I saw the Swinger multiple times in person — or at least someone in all white swinging at night (who knows if it was a person pretending to be the swinger to continue the power of that myth). As such, that was the strongest local myth, with Jay being second, as far as my perspective is concerned.
I decided to re-read this book (which, when young, was considered contraband, and passed around in secret). The library copies were always missing, and one time someone put a different dust jacket on it and placed it elsewhere so that it would always be available when needed. I wanted to re-read it to prepare for the Rick Emerson book “Unmasked Alice” about the editor/author of Jay’s Journal and Go Ask Alice, Beatrice Sparks, being a deceptive charlatan who used only 20 or so actual journal entries of the 220+ in Jay’s Journal. She had other deceptions that really hurt the Barrett family after they entrusted her with their traumatic story about their son Alden in hopes that it would prevent similar occurrences for other families, but it looks like Jay’s Journal may have created even more problems during the drug and satanic panics of the 80s and 90s. I'll probably read this book one more time in my life, after I read the Rick Emerson book, which looks to be quite detailed.
June 14, 2013
Jay’s Journal is one of several heavy-handed adolescent cautionary tales by the questionably "Dr." Beatrice Sparks who purports to have encountered this factual information as part of her field work and to have edited and assembled it in order to benefit the reader. According to his supposed diary, Jay is a naturally-gifted, well-intentioned high school student who is led astray after “falling in with the wrong crowd.” Fascinated, Jay finds himself spiraling deeper and deeper into a world of darkness and can see no way out short of taking his own life. The narrative’s single-minded focus on the occult’s seduction of the innocent and the glossing over of details that might titillate rather than revolt the audience causes Sparks to inadvertently reveal her sermonizing intentions and tends to leave the reader feeling dirty and manipulated as if she’s just watched one of those overly dramatic after-school specials from the 1980’s. Although this text reeks of social guidance films such as Boys Beware or Reefer Madness, it will appeal to fans of Go Ask Alice and similar works.
May 15, 2019
Utter trash. Beatrice Sparks took 10% of a journal and extrapolated the other 90% based on youth with similar stories. There's plenty of garbage religious propaganda, too. What a disgrace. Evidently, there is another book that tells a more accurate story of Alden, or the titular "Jay." And a rock opera. Look into those if you are interested, I suppose.
February 6, 2016
Nope.
This book was awful. It definitely made my Worst Books Ever Written list. If I met the main character in real life I would fight him. If the author was still alive I would fight her too.
This book was awful. It definitely made my Worst Books Ever Written list. If I met the main character in real life I would fight him. If the author was still alive I would fight her too.
March 13, 2018
Well that was pretty much atrocious.
April 19, 2019
So.
I remember reading all of these books in middle school and liking this one the least, but I didn't remember anything about it as an adult.
This is... quite the story.
TLDR; if you're a good Mormon kid, you'll get all your mom's homemade bread and the lead in all the school plays. If you're a bad Mormon kid, you'll sell your soul to the devil to be the best basketball player and let your whole family down.
Sorry. I mean, your whole precious, wonderful, loyal, perfect, amazing family.
"And dear... dear... sweet Mom... Oh God, how could I have hurt them, let them down, tormented them, humiliated them, disgraced them, brought suspicion upon my most honorable, Christlike, ethical father? ... She's all the things anyone could ask of a wife and mother... I really miss her homemade bread."
I think the most problematic part of this whole book for me was that this privileged, white (I assume) kid was the PERFECT CHILD with an IQ of 149+ (which they bring up about 149+ times) who was able to walk away from The Occult literally anytime he wanted, till That Girl dragged him back into it. At no point did he have any actual repercussions of his actions, except for being fake grounded, in which he was able to hotwire a truck without anyone noticing. That part where the cops found him with drugs? Mehhhh. Not a big deal. Except for That Girl. He would write whole entries about how he had the BEST MOM EVER and he was STAYING AWAY from THE "O", till TINA showed back up and got her claws back into him. (You'd think the smartest kid in the country would be able to make his own decisions, but no.)
Proof 1: He's going on about every detail of their rituals (as you do - when one is in the occult, one has to write down in great detail every thing that happened after) but then says "I just read yesterday's 'everybody feel sorry for me' bullshit and I think it's about time I changed the name of that tune." So, there you go. He wasn't REALLY into the occult, because he could change his tune anytime he wanted.
Proof 2: In the letter from his mom at the end (you know, after he said he was going to live his life for God and be happy, then killed himself?) she writes about his high IQ and all of the awards he received and how the principal just adored him. UNTIL. "He got to liking a little girl who had a drug problem and had gone with lots of boys and had fallen in love several times." The scandal! I guess we'll ignore that Jay has at least four girlfriends throughout the course of this book...
The most remarkable part of the whole book was not the demons and possession and orgies and drug use. It was the fact that not one, but TWO teenagers were killed by a car bumper to the right temple.
A car bumper. To the temple.
To. The. Temple.
(Can someone clear up Jay's age for me? They make a huge thing about him being 16 1/2 throughout the book February 1: "Can you believe only fourteen more days and I'll be sixteen?" September 6: "I dig high school and I'm knocking myself out trying to act grown up and not like some half-assed freshman." Even if this book operates on the premise that he went to junior high through ninth grade and "freshman" is referring to 10th graders, he'd turn 17 that year, and graduate high school as a 19 year old. That seems late for a kid with an IQ of 149+ and scholarship offers to every ivy league school and a personal commendation from the principal for his work on eliminating drugs.)
What else is in store for you if you read this book, besides the threat of no more homemade bread if you involve yourself in witchcraft?
Respect towards women!
"Debbie writes nearly every day. I really appreciate that because without her letters I'd go crazy. Her letters are incredibly dumb but maybe her dumbness is what makes her so precious to me, makes me need her so much."
"In a way I'm kind of glad we broke up. She used me! The dirty little whore used me! Just like everybody tried to tell me she would. I know she's back on the street with Mark Vrooder again, or whoever is around and will supply her. She alone is responsible for this whole rocked-up mess I'm in. I'd never have done the things I did without her begging and pleading and crying and crying and crying..."
And in possibly the worst passage I've ever read in a book ever: "Barry got big as a cow during the summer and her face has erupted out in pimples like volcanos. In a way the fat makes her look somewhat like her sister with Down's. I feel sorry for her! ... Me, old jock Jay, would I be seen with some fat chick with zits? I guess not..."
Poetry definitely written by a teenage boy and not a middle-aged woman!
"Golly gee I'm glad I'm me
There's no one else I'd rather be
I smile on every bird and tree.
Life is a ball. I'm in love with me!
And the music is great too!"
Strange semi-homo-erotic passages!
"I feel like a cobra with a mangoose... I feel Pete is drawn to me as I am to him, but I don't know why. He's a gorgeous, slick, slim, trim jock, and different somehow than the rest of the teachers but - I don't know - I hope he's not some crazy fairy fruit..."
"Wh...what do you want?"
He grinned. "Would you believe... your young virile bod?"
Hip slang!
"Brad and me and Dell share a locker and it's cool, man, cool!"
"Oh hell, sometimes life is really the squirts."
"Carla, the girl Tina is running against, is really a turkey tail."
"Life isn't worth poop-de-do."
"I feel so happy I want to go out and do something exciting, but what? Run down to the market and squeeze the Charmin?"
"Oh man, I'm not sure I can stand this much joy. I could kiss a cactus!"
Honestly, this propaganda is dangerous towards the mental health community. Jay obviously had some issues and the dozens of entries that start off with him angrily lashing out at everyone and then ending with a poem about how he's going to turn his life around make it seem like everything is a choice when it's not, or that it's not a choice when it is. Jay didn't have a choice to keep going back to the occult because he had bad influences, but he can just wish away his depression by choosing to think more positively?
The most honest sentence in the whole book: "We were just four asshole kids looking for excitement - any kookie, harebrained thing to explode the boring, boring, boring everydayness of average life." Bored? Make some voodoo dolls, wreck a motorcycle, sneak out, kill some cows, and get married in a cemetery!
One final thought... did anyone ever discover what saber-toothed crotch crickets are?
I remember reading all of these books in middle school and liking this one the least, but I didn't remember anything about it as an adult.
This is... quite the story.
TLDR; if you're a good Mormon kid, you'll get all your mom's homemade bread and the lead in all the school plays. If you're a bad Mormon kid, you'll sell your soul to the devil to be the best basketball player and let your whole family down.
Sorry. I mean, your whole precious, wonderful, loyal, perfect, amazing family.
"And dear... dear... sweet Mom... Oh God, how could I have hurt them, let them down, tormented them, humiliated them, disgraced them, brought suspicion upon my most honorable, Christlike, ethical father? ... She's all the things anyone could ask of a wife and mother... I really miss her homemade bread."
I think the most problematic part of this whole book for me was that this privileged, white (I assume) kid was the PERFECT CHILD with an IQ of 149+ (which they bring up about 149+ times) who was able to walk away from The Occult literally anytime he wanted, till That Girl dragged him back into it. At no point did he have any actual repercussions of his actions, except for being fake grounded, in which he was able to hotwire a truck without anyone noticing. That part where the cops found him with drugs? Mehhhh. Not a big deal. Except for That Girl. He would write whole entries about how he had the BEST MOM EVER and he was STAYING AWAY from THE "O", till TINA showed back up and got her claws back into him. (You'd think the smartest kid in the country would be able to make his own decisions, but no.)
Proof 1: He's going on about every detail of their rituals (as you do - when one is in the occult, one has to write down in great detail every thing that happened after) but then says "I just read yesterday's 'everybody feel sorry for me' bullshit and I think it's about time I changed the name of that tune." So, there you go. He wasn't REALLY into the occult, because he could change his tune anytime he wanted.
Proof 2: In the letter from his mom at the end (you know, after he said he was going to live his life for God and be happy, then killed himself?) she writes about his high IQ and all of the awards he received and how the principal just adored him. UNTIL. "He got to liking a little girl who had a drug problem and had gone with lots of boys and had fallen in love several times." The scandal! I guess we'll ignore that Jay has at least four girlfriends throughout the course of this book...
The most remarkable part of the whole book was not the demons and possession and orgies and drug use. It was the fact that not one, but TWO teenagers were killed by a car bumper to the right temple.
A car bumper. To the temple.
To. The. Temple.
(Can someone clear up Jay's age for me? They make a huge thing about him being 16 1/2 throughout the book February 1: "Can you believe only fourteen more days and I'll be sixteen?" September 6: "I dig high school and I'm knocking myself out trying to act grown up and not like some half-assed freshman." Even if this book operates on the premise that he went to junior high through ninth grade and "freshman" is referring to 10th graders, he'd turn 17 that year, and graduate high school as a 19 year old. That seems late for a kid with an IQ of 149+ and scholarship offers to every ivy league school and a personal commendation from the principal for his work on eliminating drugs.)
What else is in store for you if you read this book, besides the threat of no more homemade bread if you involve yourself in witchcraft?
Respect towards women!
"Debbie writes nearly every day. I really appreciate that because without her letters I'd go crazy. Her letters are incredibly dumb but maybe her dumbness is what makes her so precious to me, makes me need her so much."
"In a way I'm kind of glad we broke up. She used me! The dirty little whore used me! Just like everybody tried to tell me she would. I know she's back on the street with Mark Vrooder again, or whoever is around and will supply her. She alone is responsible for this whole rocked-up mess I'm in. I'd never have done the things I did without her begging and pleading and crying and crying and crying..."
And in possibly the worst passage I've ever read in a book ever: "Barry got big as a cow during the summer and her face has erupted out in pimples like volcanos. In a way the fat makes her look somewhat like her sister with Down's. I feel sorry for her! ... Me, old jock Jay, would I be seen with some fat chick with zits? I guess not..."
Poetry definitely written by a teenage boy and not a middle-aged woman!
"Golly gee I'm glad I'm me
There's no one else I'd rather be
I smile on every bird and tree.
Life is a ball. I'm in love with me!
And the music is great too!"
Strange semi-homo-erotic passages!
"I feel like a cobra with a mangoose... I feel Pete is drawn to me as I am to him, but I don't know why. He's a gorgeous, slick, slim, trim jock, and different somehow than the rest of the teachers but - I don't know - I hope he's not some crazy fairy fruit..."
"Wh...what do you want?"
He grinned. "Would you believe... your young virile bod?"
Hip slang!
"Brad and me and Dell share a locker and it's cool, man, cool!"
"Oh hell, sometimes life is really the squirts."
"Carla, the girl Tina is running against, is really a turkey tail."
"Life isn't worth poop-de-do."
"I feel so happy I want to go out and do something exciting, but what? Run down to the market and squeeze the Charmin?"
"Oh man, I'm not sure I can stand this much joy. I could kiss a cactus!"
Honestly, this propaganda is dangerous towards the mental health community. Jay obviously had some issues and the dozens of entries that start off with him angrily lashing out at everyone and then ending with a poem about how he's going to turn his life around make it seem like everything is a choice when it's not, or that it's not a choice when it is. Jay didn't have a choice to keep going back to the occult because he had bad influences, but he can just wish away his depression by choosing to think more positively?
The most honest sentence in the whole book: "We were just four asshole kids looking for excitement - any kookie, harebrained thing to explode the boring, boring, boring everydayness of average life." Bored? Make some voodoo dolls, wreck a motorcycle, sneak out, kill some cows, and get married in a cemetery!
One final thought... did anyone ever discover what saber-toothed crotch crickets are?
July 4, 2022
Two stars for entertainment value. I am curious to read the book about Beatrice Sparks (aka Anonymous) that is coming out. The writing here is terrible, especially the poetry.
September 23, 2021
Popsugar Challenge 2021 - A book that was published anonymously
November 6, 2012
Enter the world of Jay, a 16 year old high school student who starts out with high ambitions- he is on the debate team and is asked to speak at countless events for his school. He thinks he's got everything under control with the help of his best friends Brad and Dell. But of course, Jays life soon spirals downward into a world of drugs and an obsession with the occult. We already know Jay doesn't make it out alive- that is clear from the back of the book. The question is, how do days of A's and popularity turn into dark nights of black witchcraft and the supernatural? Read Jay's Journal to find out, and enter Jay's nightmare.
As always implied with Beatrice Sparks books, this book was a tough read. It deals with very mature themes but unlike Go Ask Alice, this one doesn't have as much as a relatable message or moral of the story. This book may and will seem slow at the beginning, but it is definitely worth it to turn the page. This is a must read for 8th grade and up- it will keep you thinking about it for months.
As always implied with Beatrice Sparks books, this book was a tough read. It deals with very mature themes but unlike Go Ask Alice, this one doesn't have as much as a relatable message or moral of the story. This book may and will seem slow at the beginning, but it is definitely worth it to turn the page. This is a must read for 8th grade and up- it will keep you thinking about it for months.
December 14, 2018
These books are just kinda bleh to me.
Please stay tuned for a review I promise I will catch up on my reviews this month don’t block me
Please stay tuned for a review I promise I will catch up on my reviews this month don’t block me
July 21, 2011
I wondered on multiple occasions while reading Jay’s Journal if it was true – if it was actually written by a teenager between ages 14 and 16-and-a-half. My skepticism did not stem from the story itself, but from how well some of the entries were written, and by the depth and profundity of several passages. If this is a real journal from a teenager (and there is a lot of evidence suggesting that it is) then that young man had an unusual gift of verbal intelligence. Jay’s Journal is peppered with brilliant and poetic entries that a seasoned, professional writer would be proud to have written (in the vein of “Catcher in the Rye”). Of course, not all of its entries are equally impressive. In fact, at least half the journal sounds like what a typical teenager might write, thereby exposing the author’s youth, immaturity, and lack of wisdom. Jay’s autobiography is a cautionary tale about the dangers of sex, drugs, impulsivity, rebellion and, especially, experimentation with the occult. Although drugs played a large role in his decline, Jay’s eventual suicide was undoubtedly tied to his participation in black magic ceremonies. The most powerful entries occur at the end of the journal, where he describes his interactions with an evil spirit named Raul who successfully invades Jay’s mind and body. Raul explains to Jay that he (Raul) was cast out of the presence of God, along with Satan and a third of the hosts of Heaven. Most interesting to me is Jay’s physical description of Raul. He, reportedly, looked like a normal, attractive man in his late twenties, but the color of his skin was GRAY, and he wore a single piece of clothing that looked like a gray JUMPSUIT. That’s right, gray and with jumpsuit-like clothing… exactly how the majority of ALIENS are described in stories about UFOs and abductions. This is no coincidence, I am convinced. I see this as strong evidence supporting the hypothesis that most alien/UFO encounters are actually manifestations of “evil spirits” and demons, like those discussed in ancient writings (including the Bible). Unless you believe that this book is fictional, after reading it you will want to stay far away from anything having to do with “the occult”, because the explicit dangers of black magic are plainly exposed within its tragic and haunting pages.
July 28, 2014
This purported journal presents as a first person account of a teenaged boy’s growing involvement with the occult, which leads to horrifying supernatural events and ultimately to the boy’s suicide.
Through the course of the book, high school student Jay meets a new girlfriend, Tina, who introduces him to occult practices such as levitating small objects, performing rituals that insure success in school, putting voodoo curses on people that actually work, and joining a coven. In time, Jay becomes involved in a Satanic cattle mutilation, and is haunted by a demon doppelganger called “Raul” who wants to consume his soul. Ultimately, Jay takes his own life.
Jay’s Journal is one of a series of cautionary diaries, all supposedly true and supposedly edited by Beatrice Sparks, including the infamous diary of a teenaged drug addict, “Go Ask Alice.” It is now a well-documented fact that these diaries consist chiefly of Ms. Sparks’s fabrications, including the infamous diary of a teenaged drug addict, “Go Ask Alice.” http://www.snopes.com/language/litera...
There is a genuine element of tragedy behind this “Jay’s Journal.” Some of the journal entries were taken from the actual diary of a teenaged boy who committed suicide. Only twenty five out of more than two hundred of the actual diary entries appeared in “Jay’s Journal.” None of these actual entries reference Satanism, the occult, or any evil supernatural forces. So what we have here is a book that turns the story of a real-life suicide into a ridiculous horror story by Ms. Sparks.
It’s no surprise that so many critics of the book’s authenticity point to statements from the actual boy’s family and the fact that Beatrice Sparks has written other so-called diaries in the same adult style. But it surprises me that I haven’t found a critic who points to the sheer absurdity of the events that the book describes as evidence that most of it is fiction. Improving your debate skills with occult rituals? Demon doppelgangers? Give us a break!
Through the course of the book, high school student Jay meets a new girlfriend, Tina, who introduces him to occult practices such as levitating small objects, performing rituals that insure success in school, putting voodoo curses on people that actually work, and joining a coven. In time, Jay becomes involved in a Satanic cattle mutilation, and is haunted by a demon doppelganger called “Raul” who wants to consume his soul. Ultimately, Jay takes his own life.
Jay’s Journal is one of a series of cautionary diaries, all supposedly true and supposedly edited by Beatrice Sparks, including the infamous diary of a teenaged drug addict, “Go Ask Alice.” It is now a well-documented fact that these diaries consist chiefly of Ms. Sparks’s fabrications, including the infamous diary of a teenaged drug addict, “Go Ask Alice.” http://www.snopes.com/language/litera...
There is a genuine element of tragedy behind this “Jay’s Journal.” Some of the journal entries were taken from the actual diary of a teenaged boy who committed suicide. Only twenty five out of more than two hundred of the actual diary entries appeared in “Jay’s Journal.” None of these actual entries reference Satanism, the occult, or any evil supernatural forces. So what we have here is a book that turns the story of a real-life suicide into a ridiculous horror story by Ms. Sparks.
It’s no surprise that so many critics of the book’s authenticity point to statements from the actual boy’s family and the fact that Beatrice Sparks has written other so-called diaries in the same adult style. But it surprises me that I haven’t found a critic who points to the sheer absurdity of the events that the book describes as evidence that most of it is fiction. Improving your debate skills with occult rituals? Demon doppelgangers? Give us a break!
December 17, 2019
“Jays Journal”, the author is Anonymous although it is edited by Beatrice Sparks, it is a book about a depressed teenage boy who becomes involved in drugs and satanic rituals. He soon starts to believe that he is being haunted by a ghost named Raul. This book is an biography and is based on “true” events. Jay is going through a lot and with all of this happening in his life it eventually drives him to kill himself. It's a pretty heavy book. And I can't say that I recommend it to anyone.
I don't know where to begin on my opinion of this book. I didn't like it, but I didn't dislike it. It touched me maybe a little different than others for someone who has been suicidal and has had family commit and attempt it. I don't know if I should have read that. I was being told multiple times not to read it, but I just had to. The thought of what it could hold was too tempting. While I was reading it I kept on questioning why it would ever be an approved book. It really isn't a light book. I can't recommend it to anyone. If you are reading it I would say try to take something different out of it. Try to make it say why you wouldn't want to get involved in anything that Jay does. To choose a different better path. Maybe the mother got the book out there to save lives rather than lose them.
The theme of this book would go along the lines of why life is important. All lives matter and can be changed. Just cause things are rough now and it feels like the mistakes you made have ruined your chances at life, it's not true. Anything can happen and change.
I don't know where to begin on my opinion of this book. I didn't like it, but I didn't dislike it. It touched me maybe a little different than others for someone who has been suicidal and has had family commit and attempt it. I don't know if I should have read that. I was being told multiple times not to read it, but I just had to. The thought of what it could hold was too tempting. While I was reading it I kept on questioning why it would ever be an approved book. It really isn't a light book. I can't recommend it to anyone. If you are reading it I would say try to take something different out of it. Try to make it say why you wouldn't want to get involved in anything that Jay does. To choose a different better path. Maybe the mother got the book out there to save lives rather than lose them.
The theme of this book would go along the lines of why life is important. All lives matter and can be changed. Just cause things are rough now and it feels like the mistakes you made have ruined your chances at life, it's not true. Anything can happen and change.
March 20, 2025
Dr. Beatrice Sparks was a Mormon housewife who got bored one day and decided to ruin people's lives just for the profit.
I refuse to read this book. It's a complete work of fiction and it is absolutely ridiculous that she pulled this off. You see, she based 'Jay's Journal' off of an actual diary this time, and not a diary that she claimed to be 'an anonymous teen's diary' when it was really her who wrote it. His name was Alden Niel Barrett, who committed suicide by a gunshot in his hometown, Pleasant Grove, Utah, at just 16 years young in the early 1970's. Alden was an intelligent and passionate student who had a loving family. Alden eventually spiraled down an inescapable hole of depression, which led up to his death on March 13 of 1971. His parents decided to donate his numerous journal entries that documented his episodes of depression and loneliness to Beatrice Sparks, who they hoped would bring light to teen depression.
Instead of using these journal entries to do good, she took only a few of these journal entries and completely fabricated the rest. Alden was not a satanist and did not commit these horrible crimes whatsoever. She caused Satanist propaganda and included Mormon ideologies in this book. Back in Utah, Alden's family became extremely upset for this. Alden's brother came out with the factual truth of his brother's experiences in his diary. His parents eventually divorced due to the backlash.
https://www.amazon.com/review/R1MVJ7P...
I refuse to read this book. It's a complete work of fiction and it is absolutely ridiculous that she pulled this off. You see, she based 'Jay's Journal' off of an actual diary this time, and not a diary that she claimed to be 'an anonymous teen's diary' when it was really her who wrote it. His name was Alden Niel Barrett, who committed suicide by a gunshot in his hometown, Pleasant Grove, Utah, at just 16 years young in the early 1970's. Alden was an intelligent and passionate student who had a loving family. Alden eventually spiraled down an inescapable hole of depression, which led up to his death on March 13 of 1971. His parents decided to donate his numerous journal entries that documented his episodes of depression and loneliness to Beatrice Sparks, who they hoped would bring light to teen depression.
Instead of using these journal entries to do good, she took only a few of these journal entries and completely fabricated the rest. Alden was not a satanist and did not commit these horrible crimes whatsoever. She caused Satanist propaganda and included Mormon ideologies in this book. Back in Utah, Alden's family became extremely upset for this. Alden's brother came out with the factual truth of his brother's experiences in his diary. His parents eventually divorced due to the backlash.
https://www.amazon.com/review/R1MVJ7P...
October 27, 2010
I honestly hated this book so much that I would rate it 0.5 stars. I guess the theme of this book is insolence because in this book, fifteen year old Jay talks about how much his life sucks and how he regrets all the terrible things her has done such as stealing drugs for his girlfriend from his father's pharmacy and how he is obsessed with drugs. He commits suicide at age 16 because he "was tired of all the hassles and didn't want to do anything that living people do". Every time he is always declaring how much he hates this and how much he hates that and it irritated me! I will not tolerate this because that shows how much he wants everyone to feel sorry for him just because he made mistakes in his life. I received no action in this book and I thought there would be action at the end but I was wrong. Even if it is based on a true story, I lost patience and rated it 1 star. I wasn't entertained and that's what books are suppose to do except this one didn't. I want to yell at him and tell him GET A LIFE because he is suppose to be aware of his own actions and not just realize its the girls that ruined his life. What I am trying to say is that this book can disinterest you in many ways and I recommend you read the first pages and see if you like it.
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