Tâm Sự Về Tình Yêu - Những Lời Khuyên Chạm Đến Trái Tim Về Tình Yêu, Tình Bạn, Gia Đình Và Bản Thân

by Dolly Alderton, Hải Ân (Translator)

‘Điều tôi học được khi chia sẻ nỗi đau riêng tư nhất của mình với một người giải quyết vấn đề bán chuyên nghiệp, đó là bản thân việc tìm kiếm sự giúp đỡ đã mang lại sự chữa lành. Cứ như thể tôi đã lén xuống bến tàu trong đêm tối và thả một thông điệp trong chai, tưởng tượng xem nó sẽ được đón nhận như thế nào. Bằng cách viết ra, tôi thừa nhận rằng ai đó có thể quan tâm đến mình; rằng họ có thể nói những điều đúng đắn mà không cần biết tôi là ai. Bởi vì tôi đang cảm nhận những điều mà người khác cũng đã cảm thấy, và do đó, tôi không phải là người phụ nữ cô đơn và kỳ lạ nhất trên thế giới như tôi vẫn nghĩ.'’

Từ đầu năm 2020, Dolly Alderton đã chia sẻ sự khôn ngoan, ấm áp và dí dỏm của mình với vô số người đã viết thư cho chuyên mục tư vấn "Dear Dolly" của cô trên tờ The Sunday Times Style. Những câu hỏi của họ trải dài từ những nỗi đau - và đôi khi là những niềm vui - cho đến những điều kỳ quặc. Chúng bao gồm những chia tay và vấn đề về cơ thể, gia đình, tình bạn, hẹn hò, ly hôn, những niềm vui và cạm bẫy của mạng xã hội, tình dục, sự cô đơn, khao khát, tình yêu và mọi thứ ở giữa.

Không phán xét, và với sự đồng cảm sâu sắc được đúc kết từ những trải nghiệm của chính mình trong tình yêu, tình bạn và hẹn hò, Dolly dẫn dắt chúng ta qua những mê cung khác nhau của cuộc sống, chứng minh rằng một vấn đề được chia sẻ thực sự là một vấn đề được giải quyết một nửa.

Genres: Nonfiction, Audiobook, Self Help, Memoir, Essays, Feminism, Contemporary

224 pages, Paperback

First published October 27, 2022

About the author

Dolly Alderton is an award-winning author and journalist. She is a columnist for The Sunday Times Style and has also written for GQ, Red, Marie Claire and Grazia. From 2017 to 2020, she co-hosted the weekly pop-culture and current affairs podcast The High Low alongside journalist Pandora Sykes.

Her first book Everything I Know About Love became a top five Sunday Times bestseller in its first week of publication and won a National Book Award for Autobiography of the Year. Her first novel Ghosts was published in October 2020 and was also a top five Sunday Times Bestseller.

Reviews

[Myra Schmitz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank god for Dolly Alderton

[AbbysBooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

Why is Dolly not my best friend?

[Joana da Silva · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading this book feels like having a long coffee with Dolly herself. Although I didn't love Everything I Know About Love at the time I read it (and have already reached the conclusion that it was a matter of right book-wrong time), I really like Dolly's writing. I see myself coming back to this one in the future and re-reading some of the entries. Funny how I found the most relatable advice on the questions that didn't strike me as so at first.

[lau (readbylau) · Rating 4 out of 5]

life feels a bit less scary after reading this

[ella grace · Rating 5 out of 5]

dolly alderton’s writing is so genuinely my version of the bible

[daniella ❀ · Rating 4 out of 5]

DOLLY ALDERTON MY LORD AND SAVIOR (her books changed my life fr)

[Melissa Malone · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5/5 - An all-round boring selection of questions. I enjoy Dolly but I found this book one-note and repetitive. I loved Everything I Know About Love and was hoping some of the questions or responses would be more risqué... but most could be summed up with an empowered message to "love yourself" which, sorry, is so dull.

[Jess✨ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dear Dolly,

Some books take me on extravagant, emotional journeys that leave me devastated and will stay with me for days, weeks, months or even years. With plots that I may not remember in detail, but the feelings, and emotional roller coaster stay. Period!
I feel like that some books stay with me for life. And because of all the emotional damage, books have let me endeavour, I do say - or at least want to say - quite often, that some books really need to pay for my therapy.
So, oh, what a lovely experience it was to listen to Dear Dolly, and basically have a therapy session. Thank you!
Thank you for the 4 hours and 46 minutes of free therapy. Thank you, Dolly, for being my guru and giving advice for and to my past self, my current self, people I know, people I left behind, people I will meet, and my future self!

with love,
Jess

P.S. I LOVE your voice. I could listen to it for hours and uups that's exactly what I did 😅❤️

[leah · Rating 4 out of 5]

a quick, easy, and overall very comforting read. dear dolly is made up of snippets from dolly alderton's agony aunt column in the sunday times, so it’s the perfect, low-maintenance book that you can dip in and out of whenever you have 5 minutes. i’ve loved dolly’s previous 2 books: her memoir everything i know about love and her fiction debut ghosts, so i’m looking forward to whatever she does next. kind of hoping she does some more tv producing because the tv adaptation of everything i know about love was great.

[Melissa (Hiatus due to Death in Family) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dolly Alderton writes the column "Dear Dolly" in the Sunday Times, and is known for her honest, personable advice to those writing in seeking guidance.

This book is a compilation of many of the common themes of the letters on the subjects of Dating, Friendship, Relationships, Family, Sex, Break-ups/Exes, and Body & Soul. Her answers to the letters are uplifting, empowering, and relatable. I did find most of the questions and answers to be for those quite a bit younger than myself, but there are a few that pertain to Gen X readers.

If you're looking for some encouragement and advice with issues in your life, then this meaningful book just might hit the spot. There's nothing groundbreaking or new here, but it's refreshing to read answers that urge readers to be true to themselves.

I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book, all opinions are my own.

[Álainn · Rating 2 out of 5]

i think the worst thing u can say about a book is that every 3 pages u check to see how much longer u have left and that’s exactly how i felt with this (very short) book

[Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dolly Alderton is the older sister I never had and I love her for that.

[Nadie · Rating 5 out of 5]

a friend you can confide in in book form


4.5

[John Gilbert · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my thing at all, wasted on me. May be interesting to some if you like advice columns.

[mary steven · Rating 2 out of 5]

i can of course see why people love dolly alderton’s work but i, personally, no longer wish to read about the white woman’s experience marketed as a one size fits all experience.

though there were many pages i was highlighting and making mental notes over, i also audibly laughed when the book suggested separating politics from sexuality.

anyway, £17 for a collection of newspaper articles is crazy crazy but as someone who doesn’t have any sisters, this is what i imagine it might be like to get some big sister advice and that was nice :)

[daisy]

"learn to be with yourself now. your future self will thank you."

[madii ੈ✩ ♡ · Rating 4 out of 5]

this collection was such a fun, refreshing change of pace to end the year with, being a quick one to fly through with its concise format & witty, heartfelt prose.

having loved dolly’s previous works, particularly ‘everything i know about love’ (which is an all time favourite of mine), i was excited to devour more of her words of wisdom. being a collection of her advice columns in the new york times, it was short & informative & wildly entertaining, encouraging and inspiring.

immediately i connected with dolly & fell into the rhythm of her writing, and i continue to grow more and more fond of this woman as i engage with more of her work. i truly trust her as such a grounded, reliable, self-aware & thoughtful source. i learnt a lot from her & i admire her a lot.

even the advice columns that weren’t relevant to me were engaging and insightful, and her moral perspectives and personal ethics very much aligned with my own. but even when we disagreed on certain topics, i appreciated how her words helped me form & understand my own views and opinions more.

i strive to one day be as eloquent, respectful, honest & articulate dolly herself is, and damn her advice is good guys. i think this is one of the most annotated books in my collection now, and i know i’ll be referring back to it countless times. i definitely recommend it when you are in need of an uplifting, meaningful work exploring many topics in a light-hearted but impactful manner.

[Abby Yap · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank God for Dolly - I’m obsessed with her deeply empathetic, entirely shame-absolving and emotionally intelligent wisdom! Nothing like zooming through 50-odd advice columns on a Sunday evening to put all your worries about life at ease.

Sent pictures of various pages to my friends and I know I’ll be referring back to it at times of need. I truly hope she never gets cancelled because I’m fully initiated into the cult now!

Can’t wait for her next project!

[Lauren · Rating 4 out of 5]

my most annotated book to date. dolly alderton is a god sent and I’m constantly blown away by her insight and advice. I cant wait to read more from her 😭

[Merel Wildschut · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ik vind alles wat Alderton schrijft grappig en inzichtelijk. Dit boek staat vol met adviescolumns (antwoorden op ingezonden brieven) en vooral van het hoofdstuk “break-ups & exes” heb ik erg genoten. Hardop gelachen, dat ook. Love you, Dolly 💖

[danyella ꕥ · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 🌟

being the eldest daughter, i don't have an older sister to turn to when i need advice or help but dolly alderton's writing is a great substitute for that. this collection of advice columns is the perfect read for any woman of any age as she discusses topics on romance and friendships to family dynamics and body image.

[alisha · Rating 5 out of 5]

4,5 ⭐️ this feels like a really long, good talk with one of your best friends <3

[elin | winterrainreads · Rating 3 out of 5]

〝what I learnt from sharing my most private pain with a semi-professional problem-solver was that the mere act of asking for help was, in itself, healing.〞

★★★.5

this is a quick and easy read perfect if you love dolly alderton's other books. this won't stick with me like everything I know about love did but I also don't think it would be fair to put them in the same category. this was first of all a little too self-helpy for my taste. secondly, there's just a lot of bad advice in this one that kind of left a bad taste in my mouth. what I really loved in this was that her humor still shines through really well and I laughed out loud multiple times. if you just want something not to serious and something that feels like a gossip session with a friend; this would be an excellent choice.

cawpile: 6.71
ig: @winterrainreads

[leah · Rating 2 out of 5]

Feel bad giving this two stars because I know it’s more meant for people in their 30s and 40s not me. But in comparison to everything I know about love this was so impersonal. Do not really understand why this needed to be made into a book if all of this already exists in her Sunday times column

[anna grace · Rating 4 out of 5]

dear dolly,

i love you. the older sister i never had. some of the excerpts applied to me today, some will apply to me in the future, some maybe never but i enjoyed reading each piece so much. her insight into life is so beautiful. definitely a book to revisit over time like a bible.

[Johann (jobis89) · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars. I just love Dolly - I wish she was my pal.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

The perfect book for every agony aunt fangirl out there. I absolutely LOVED this. And it‘s such a quick, fast-paced read with super short chapters!

Dolly Alderton‘s advice is so pure and genuine. She puts so much thought and effort into her answers and some of the problems she deals with are SO relatable. I love that she doesn‘t try to solve other people‘s problems by telling them exactly what to do, she basically suggests multiple ways that can help ease certain situations.
A must read!

[Beatriz Bravo C. · Rating 4 out of 5]

no es un libro necesariamente entretenido pero que si disfruté mucho y te invita a la reflexión y auto introspección sin caer en ser un libro de autoayuda
esta escrito en formato preguntas y respuestas, en base a cartas que fans le envían a Dolly Alderton
y toca temas que vivimos todas o que hemos visto vivir a muchas mujeres
se siente como un abrazito colectivo de girlhood❤️‍🩹

[j o h a n n a ౨ৎ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dolly is the love of my life.

[Laura Lovely · Rating 5 out of 5]

live, laugh, love, dolly <3