A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted

by Will Bowen

Full of practical ideas and inspiring stories from people who have already transformed their lives through the Complaint Free program, you'll learn not only how to stop complaining but also how to become more positive and live the life you’ve always dreamed about. More than ten million people in 106 countries have used the simple principles found in this book to eradicate the toxicity of complaining from their lives.  And, as a result, they have experienced better health, happier relationships, greater career success and a significant increase in happiness.A Complaint Free World will explain what constitutes a complaint, why we complain, what benefits we think we receive from complaining, how complaining is destructive to our lives, and how we can get others around us to stop complaining. Find out how forming the simple habit of not complaining can transform your health, relationships, career and life. Consciously striving to reformat your mental hard drive is not easy, but you can start now by using the steps Bowen presents here. If you stay with it, you'll find that not only will you stop complaining, but others around you will cease to do so as well and in a short period of time, you'll have a more positive life. “A Complaint Free World is an engaging, enjoyable, easy-to-read reminder that the only permanent, constructive changes you can make in the world are the changes that you make in yourself.” –Gary Zukav, author of The Seat of the Soul and Soul to Soul

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Psychology, Audiobook, Inspirational, Business

306 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 16, 2007

About the author

Will Bowen is an author and speaker who has been featured on/in "Oprah," NBC's "Today Show," ABC's "World News Tonight," CBS "Sunday Morning," "Fox News," "The Wall Street Journal," "Newsweek," "People," "O," "Self," "Chicken Soup for the Soul" and in hundreds of media stories around the world.

His first two books, "A Complaint Free World" (now expanded and updated) and "Complaint Free Relationships" are international best-sellers having sold more than 2 million copies around the world.

A Complaint Free World, the non-profit organization Will founded, has sent more than 10 million Complaint Free bracelets to 106 countries.

Bowen speaks to organizations helping them shift their focus from negative complaining and fault-finding to positive problem-solving leading to happier employees and even happier customers. Clients include:

*The Million Dollar Roundtable's "Top of the Table"
* Volvo Motor Company
* PriceWaterhouseCoopers
* The Human Resource Professionals Association (HRPA)
* Pratt & Whitney
* Kimberly Clark

Bowen's newest book, "Happy This Year!" demonstrates the power we have in setting and achieving higher levels of happiness regardless of what life may bring. The book is being packaged with a free Smartphone app allowing the reader to set a happiness level goal and measure his or her progress toward that goal.

The app is called "HappyStat" and is available for Iphone, Android and Kindle at www.HappyThisYear.com.

Web sites:

HappyThisYear.com
AComplaintFreeWorld.org
WillBowen.com

Reviews

[Naomi Toftness · Rating 1 out of 5]

I think books should come with warning labels when they are written by religious professionals.

[Miss Kim · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book commences with a quote from Maya Angelou, where she states: ”If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude. Don’t complain" (page 1). I find it so inspirational and uplifting for a woman who faced abused as a child, and literally lost her voice for years, to make such a powerful statement. Randy Pausch also lectured to not complain, as he brought up the example of how Jackie Robinson had it in his contract not to complain if people spit on him.

This book advises its readers how complaining (or even venting), has proven to make a problem become even worse. When we complain, we stay focused on the negative and refuse to act toward change. We become immobilized and set in our miserable ways, which doesn't do justice to ourselves, or to those around us.

As a result, the solution is to try a 21 day "fast" from complaining, since it can take 21 days to break a habit. As James Allen expressed, “You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you" (pg. 58). If we can have the dedication and motivation to stay complaint-free, we will enable ourselves to further reach our potential and spread goodness throughout our community.

[Ying Ying · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this book if you want to live complaint free. The effects are: enjoying positive feelings, having more energy and having gratitude in life. Even if you read just the first chapters, it might change how your days are.

[Katie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Part of me thinks that I shouldn't knock the movement espoused in this book before I try it...but suffice to say, this book definitely did not convince me to.

On some level I get it. No one likes someone who's constantly complaining, and in general I think people should strive for less negativity. But in my own experience, holding complaints in makes me feel worse, not better, and does not stop me from having negative thoughts. It even makes me feel lonelier, because sometimes complaining to others lets you know that you're not alone with your problems. Plus, a lot of this is basically the Law of Attraction- the bullshit you find in The Secret. The author, who is a minister in the Unity Church, says that he has a deal with God where the weather will always be good when he needs it to be. Uh, okay, I'm sure trying that will work out great for everyone who's in the path of a hurricane right now.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book -- thanks Suzanne! The premise of this book is that our thoughts determine the quality of our lives, our words reflect what we are thinking. By controlling our words and avoiding complaints, criticism, or gossip we improve the quality of our lives. The challenge is to go 21 consecutive days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. The book came with a purple plastic bracelet that you wear and change wrists every time you catch yourself saying something negative. It's an eye opener! I'm taking the challenge!

[Lee Adams · Rating 1 out of 5]

Few other books have been so terrible. This could have been written as "get a purple bracelet. Stop complaining. The end." I did love the author's claim the the braclet was a "world-wide phenomenon" when approximately 0.08% of the world has worn one of his bracelets.

[Stephanie R. · Rating 3 out of 5]

I should probably mention up front that I read this book while I was waiting for something, not because I was interested in the subject. Overall, it was a decent book and held my attention from cover to cover. However, I am pretty sure that if you take this book's advice, you will either become a doormat or everyone will think you've taken a vow of silence.

The idea is to take the challenge to stop complaining out loud for 21 days (at which point it will supposedly become a habit) but almost half of the book is actually about "The Secret" which is the very old idea that you can make good things happen to you by thinking about them. I understand why the author included that, even though it's not his own idea. If you're using your intentions to make good things happen to you, then you will have less to complain about.

My favorite part of the book was when he explained why people complain and what you can do about it. For example, people complain because they want attention, remove responsibility from themselves, inspire envy, have power (point out flaws in others just to say they don't have that flaw), and excuse their poor performance. So if you determine that they just want to remove the responsibility for their problem by playing the "yes, but" game, you can say, "I have faith in your ability to handle your problem" and if you say it often enough, they will either solve their problem or stop talking to you. Either way, you win. This advice was the best and made it all worth the read.

My least favorite part was all the filler. I think there are way too many testimonials: at least one to start every chapter and then a chapter full of them at the end. He also includes some seriously disturbing, graphic stories of people who remained positive when they had bad things happen to them. Without all the filler of testimonials, stories about how awful it is to hear people complain, and all the stuff about The Secret, the book would be more of a pamphlet.

I'm not sure if I will actually try and stop complaining, but I kind of like the idea. Now I am unsure how I can point out things that are negative without it being complaining. He says that it's OK to point out problems as long as it's to the person who is directly responsible and if you have the right tone of voice. I don't know if I can handle that but even if I'm not sure when I am complaining or stating a fact, I think it will benefit me to be mindful of when I am possibly complaining or being negative.

[Denise · Rating 1 out of 5]

This seems like a trap-if I am critical of this book, then am I merely a complainer? Facts are not complaints, so let's go with this: I started listening to the recorded book and thought it was one long infomercial. I stopped listening to the book and checked the reviews, which were mostly positive. I finished listening to the book, which sounded like one long infomercial, including testimonials from the author's congregational members and a request to call your congressman to press him to declare a national no complaint day. Sounded like one long infomercial.

[Sarah Boies · Rating 1 out of 5]

I started this book but was unable to finish. The entire book felt like a scam - additionally - the bands they talk about are not free, so I'm not sure why they do not have an updated book. Half of the book is testimonials from others - not actual assistance or techniques to stop complaining. I realize this is ironic considering the topic of the book - but so be it! Thankful I got this from the library instead of spending my money on this.

[Mystie Winckler · Rating 1 out of 5]

MCL. I forget where I saw the recommendation....someplace random.

I was up for reading a challenging book about not complaining. This wasn't it. This was a thoroughly "power of positive thinking," God=Universe=Neutral.

Using the trick of moving a bracelet to make you aware might be useful, but even according to his story, it started off as a gimmick and it still seems to me that it is.

The book is entirely testimonial & pontification, no research, no backing, no authority. He sprinkles in a quote here or there for good measure, but more in a proverbial way than proof.

Not complaining is a worthy, virtuous, and Biblical concept, but this book won't get you there.

[Victoria]

The book repeatedly assures you that you can get a bracelet free by request. But I could find no option to get one free. So I read the About page and saw: A Complaint Free World ceased to be a non-profit in 2012. Once I discovered this, I lost interest in the book. Especially after reading online that this simple idea is now a business that tries to sell you more stuff to achieve what the book said could be done for free.

[Erika · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read this book because my aunt was recently diagnosed with cancer and bought copies of it for our entire family, having found it inspirational. I love my aunt and usually respect her intellectual judgement. I see where she is coming from - as someone becoming ill during a pandemic she is very scared, very prone to *complain* (if that is what you want to call a very real sense of grappling with the possible finality of life), and wants a way to be held accountable for being positive. So I'm not going to tell her what I honestly think of this book.

I hated this book.

This book is profoundly stupid, almost to the point of being insidious. The parts of it that are true - negativity is not helpful, complaining is not rational - are obvious and the rest of it is just obnoxious. Its method for combatting negative thoughts patterns - just don't complain because complaining is a sign of your will to power, need for attention etc (i.e.a sign of your moral failings) - is, just going to aggravate the thought patterns that create negativity, particularly for people who are temperamentally prone to anxiety and low-grade depression as most chronic complainers are. It relies on the pure power of positive thinking and repeating itself *over and over again* rather than providing a compassionate and workable way of improving our thinking so it is more rational (and, ergo, less prone to complaint).

Very little attention in this book is paid to figuring out why you are prone to complain in the first place and dealing with those feelings. Instead, you're literally supposed to just shut up and smile. First, there are certain things that *should* structurally be complained about. The shut up and smile approach is one of the more insidious weapons of late capitalism - stop thinking about widening racial and socioeconomic disparities you loser! Smile, praise Lord Mammon and do your job! This cult of toxic positivity is effectively skewered by Barbara Ehrenreich's Bright-Sided. Indeed, at certain points the author even seems to be a parody of himself with the underlying support he provides to structural injustice.

Secondly, even those complaints that maybe do not stem from "rational' structural sources are generally a founded in deep, legitimate emotional reasons. How is just not saying stuff out loud - and, moreover, being told that your complaining is just a sign of your negativity and badness - going to help you in the long run? Shouldn't you deal with why you need so much attention (why can't you bestow love on yourself) or why you need to assert power (maybe you are afraid of losing control?) I can answer for myself - and others who are maybe prone to be depressive (an actual thing! which actual people with actual expertise in psychology have proven exists!) and have only learned over time to be more optimist- that framing your thoughts this way is only going to make you feel bad about yourself. And then you'll want to complain more. Maybe it works differently for other people - but I'm going to go out on a limb and say most chronic pessimists are like me.

If you want books that actually help you think positively in a constructive manner - that include studies rather than bullshit anecdotes and coach you through how to think more positively, I'd recommend Oliver Burkeman's The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking and Daniel Goldman's Thinking Fast and Slow.

[Bookscmc · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldn't put this book down, read it straight through for an average of 3-4 hours. Put it down only to write a few quotes down etc.

Couldn't help but wonder out of curiosity how Mr. Bowen would write an entire book on the topic of 'stop complaining.' I was delightfully entertained with a few stories and the whole idea of wearing a wrist band as a reminder to stop complaining, intrigues me. I've ordered my own purple wrist band to give it a shot. I, too, need improvement in this area. We all complain on a daily basis and interestingly enough, even when we consider ourselves to be quite positive people.

I enjoyed this book and will re-read it again sometime. Great idea to convert the world to "A Complaint Free World." I'm a believer every little improvement we make within ourselves we are a step indeed closer to a better world!

Big thumbs up!

[Jenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love a good challenge and this book is proving to be just that! The whole idea is to go 21 days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping and you wear a bracelet as a reminder that you switch back and forth between wrists when you slip and do one of the mentioned. Eek, can it really be that hard?! Let's just say I've yet to make it through a day, but I'm close :) (ave. results are 8-9 months for 21 days). Anyway, all of that aside the author is a minister in Missouri and draws upon a lot of great stories and ideas he's compiled over the years so it makes for a fun read and makes me wish I could be part of his congregation for a Sunday.
Anthropologist Margaret Mead once wrote that we should "never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." - One of many wonderful thoughts from the book.

[Adam · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an amazing book...on many levels. Its simple and repetitive but then again so is life; well at least the repetitive part. This was one of those 'I am not the sam person and don't look at life/things/people the same way after reading it. I experience things and "think" about them differently...in a good way! I recommend this to anyone who feels that they are ready to be aware........of....well, the title would suggest complaining but it does somehow bring to light so many other 'disorders' and 'disillusions' that we all go through daily. I can honestly say that I think about and/or talk about this book every day. Good read for all you spiritual/self-improvement types and, honestly, anyone.

[Rosemarie Donzanti · Rating 3 out of 5]

New Years Resolution...let's see if I make it to 12:15 AM. 😉. Your thoughts dictate your words, dictate your actions, dictates your relationships and your health. All makes sense. New decade, turned 60, new attitude...Let's do this!

“The Complaint Free challenge is not an easy one. It takes time and conscious effort to make it through that first complaint-free day. But once your habits and your thinking start to change, it becomes easier. The key is to keep trying. For me, this challenge was not just about stopping complaining; it’s about turning the complaints into gratitude for the blessings that I have. I see the good instead of only seeing things to complain about.”
― Will Bowen, A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted

[GONZA · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was a bit annoyed by the tone of the television barker that is a classic of these books written by motivational speakers and Ted Talkers. Nonetheless, there were several interesting insights and food for thought that I would do well to keep in mind because I am a complainer and I live with a serial complainer.

Mi dava un po' di fastidio il tono da imbonitore televisivo che é un classico di questi libri scritti appunto da motivational speaker e ted talker. Ciononostante ci sono stati parecchi punti interessanti e riflessioni che farei bene a tenere presenti anche perché io sono una che si lamenta e vivo con un lamentoso seriale.

[Heather · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked up this book because I love the idea (and unfortunately I'm a complainer - but is that me complaining about being a complainer? I guess I should switch my wristband again!).

I thought the book was super-easy/quick to read and I am trying to follow it (1 week without a complaint free day so far - it looks like I'm on track for the average 4-8 months to go 21 days without complaining). I do think it's a great concept and I'm going to stick with it.

Outside of that, many of the ideas written about are pretty common themes from other books I've read (hence only 3 stars).

[Maria · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was optimistic, thinking it would lighten my mood and help me be a part of making the world a nicer place, but that's not really what I got from the book. About half way through my interest was no longer peaked and I realized, I don't mind a complaint every once in a while. It shows what we love and don't love and I think the world still needs a complaint or two. So, sorry folks. You'll still hear complaints from me from time to time.

[Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

We reviewed this at our book club in September. It is amazing to understand how many times we complain about things, and a wonderful opportunity to stop! Your life will be much sweeter when you learn to stop complaining about everything!! Try it!

[Alberto Vernacchio · Rating 5 out of 5]

Small but powerful book . Complaining is a habit and like anything else can be broken .

[Jennifer Blaschik · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very cool concept. Stop complaining and create a better life for yourself and those around you. It’s certainly not easy. Each day is a new day to try though. 🙂

[Cassie Sneed · Rating 4 out of 5]

There are several things in this book that were good to think about and work on. While there were times that I would disagree with the credit he gives, overall, I think it was helpful. Now on to trying not to complain!

[Janie Hudon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Un livre que je vais re lire …
Il ma surpris car … sa ma fait prendre conscience de plusieurs choses …
Je le recommande

[Helen · Rating 3 out of 5]

In A Complaint Free World Kansas City Pastor Will Bowen describes how his parishioners have changed their lives through the simple act of not complaining. They use bracelets that they slip from wrist to wrist when they catch themselves voicing negative thoughts to remind themselves of the impact of their words.

After describing how the movement began, Bowen’s parishioners provide testimonial of how becoming complaint free has affected their lives. Fans of Byrne’s The Secret will find practical and actionable advice in Complaint Free World.

My only complaint with the book (*Snort*) is that I have so little to say since putting on my bracelet. No one, however, seems to miss the old me.

[Tomáš Eller · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tahle kniha by měla být na seznamu snad všech lidí. Nejedná se o nějaký další motivační blámoc.

Will Bowen jasně prezentuje fakta a ukazuje, co obyčejné "stěžování" může v samotném výsledku způsobit.

Mně samotnému otevřelo oči i to, že do stěžování se řadí i sarkasmus.

Už měsíc nosím fialový náramek a i když se mi zatím nepodařilo nestěžovat si více jak 2 dny, tak i přesto vnímám, jak můj život začíná být bezstarostný. Mám z toho upřímnou radost. :))

[Rachel Kopel · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have just started reading this. I am still using a rubber band and not the snazzy purple bracelet, although I have ordered one. It is pretty amazing the number of times a day that I complain, criticize or gossip. I am wearing out rubber bands like crazy. But I am still a beginner. All will be well and all will be well and all will be well.

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't think I'll ever go as far as wearing a purple bracelet on my wrist and attempting a full 21 days without complaining. But it does make you more aware of how much you complain, and starts your mind reframing things. It has already made me a more positive/aware person. Quick read, too.

[Tassanee · Rating 4 out of 5]

เป็นหนังสือที่เตือนสติให้เรามองโลกในแง่บวก เพราะโดยส่วนใหญ่แล้วคนเรามักจะบ่นตลอดเวลา ซึ่งจะทำให้ดึงแต่เรื่องไม่มีความสุ��เข้ามาในชีวิต เมื่อรู้ตัวว่าเป็นคนชอบบ่น ยอมรับ ตั้งสติ และฝึกฝนอย่างตั้งใจ จนถึงวันหนึ่ง การมองโลกในแง่ดีมันจะเป็นไปโดยอัตโนมัติ

[Natálie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Opravdu skvěle napsaná kniha, která může pomoct ke změně našeho myšlení. Moc se mi líbili i příběhy ze života, které dokazují, že stěžování nám vlastně v ničem nepomáhá. Věřím, že jednou se také dostanu přes jednadvacetidenní výzvu a uvidím vše z té lepší stránky. :-)