Beyond the Rainbow Bridge: Nurturing Our Children from Birth to Seven

by Barbara J. Patterson, Pamela Bradley, Jean Riordan (Illustrator)

by Barbara J. Patterson, Pamela Bradley and Jean Riordan (Perfect Paperback - Jan 1, 2000)

Genres: Parenting, Education, Nonfiction, Childrens, Reference, Family

207 pages, Perfect Paperback

First published January 1, 2000

Reviews

[Rhiannon · Rating 5 out of 5]

(edited)

My family is not exactly a "Waldorf Family," however, we do appreciate the Waldorf style and philosophy. (And I have long since learned that I do not have to subscribe to any philosophy wholly in order to borrow from it). But this book really brought to light a lot of what the Waldorf philosophy rides on for young children and gave me ideas for bringing that into my own parenting. My children are a bit old for this book's teachings, though. I'd say that it's best for parents of infants up to age 5.

What is great about this book is the parent questions at the end of each chapter. This really helps a skeptic, I think, digest the book instead of holding it at arms length and dismissing the whole thing. Another great aspect is the songs and craft instructions for making simple Waldorf toys.

But, by far, the biggest gem for me in the whole book is the magic word "may". Once I started using that with my children ("You may put your dishes away." "You may hang up your coat."), I was converted! Wow! It works! If you want to understand, you may read this book. :)

I believe that this book is a huge help in enjoying my children more and raising future children in a more gentle way.

[Ardra · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great intro to Waldorf early education. Really loved the ideas presented in this book. It has changed how I view simple tasks such as sweeping the floor, baking with Ethan, etc. Now instead of seeing it as a chore (that's a PIA), I look at it as a calming activity that doesn't need to be rushed, keeping in mind that my children are absorbing my attitude. The old fashioned way of life (the daily rituals--Monday is wash day, Tuesday is ironing day, Wednesday is baking day, etc) was very comforting for children. We wouldn't want to give up our modern conveniences but we can still recreate some of these rhythms. Also it really sold me on the idea of gentle discipline so that our children don't build up protective walls that we can't penetrate. (Easier said than done--I'm trying out singing a song as I get Ethan to do what I want him to do--helps to keep me calm anyway!)
It inspired me to read a lot more about Waldorf education. Ultimately I decided that pursuing the K-12 school is not for us since I question the anthroposophic ideas it is based on. However for preschool I could not be happier, and I see Ethan absolutely thriving under the loving care of his teacher (who loaned me this book.)

[Melissa · Rating 2 out of 5]

In trying to learn about Waldorf early childhood education, I read most of this book, very quickly. It's super easy to read, and the mystery of Waldorf is fading, finally. An awkward relationship to the belief system behind Waldorf has replaced my intrigue. The "science" of anthroposophy feels too much like faith, and faith would be fine, if it wasn't called science. This is not much of a review of this book, but this book led me here: It will be, for me, a tradition to borrow from, with lots of good ideas, particularly with regard to how to adjust my own behavior for the benefit of my child's imitation. I've started doing more work around her, cleaning and such, tidying her things when she gets fussy. And maybe one less-cynical day, I'll believe in the world of faceless angels.

[Courtney · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is similar to other Waldorf family/parenting books. The exceptional part, and chapter most helpful to me, is about Creative Discipline and the magic word of "may". It would be worth checking out at a library for this chapter. Otherwise the rest of the content gets covered in other books like Simplicity Parenting or You Are Your Child's First Teacher, which I like better. The format of some of this book is a bit hard to follow because of the recorded conversations.

[Sheridan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I would say this is an amazing book for parents interested in Waldorf education.

It was simple, but gave a great overview into the first years of childhood. A definite must read for Waldorf parents or anyone interested in it.

Even if you are not, still a good read. Some great tips. The most helpful - using "you may" instead of "would you"

For instance - "would you take out the garbage?" they can say NO!

"You may take out the garbage now."

It is amazing how great this works!!!

[Amanda Medlin · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the chapter on creative discipline. The rest of the book was good, but just basic Waldorf philosophy, nothing that new or different. If you are unfamiliar with Waldorf, it would be a good introduction. If you are familiar with Waldorf, it might be a bit repetitive of what you already know.

[Alison · Rating 2 out of 5]

There were some sweet and tender moments in this book which I will take into my life as a parent. There were also some of those dogmatic pronouncements that risk souring the whole experience.

General reflection: we are waiting for parents to meet the movement, and we are doing a poor job of meeting parents where they are. The kind of suggestions (although they come across more as rules, like what shape dolls should have at what age and what color walls should be painted to reflect the light in a particular way) set forth here work for only a very, very, very, very, extremely, undoubtedly, far too small sample of the population. I get that off-the-beaten-path movements start small and always sound strange when compared to the mainstream. But the attitude conveyed in this book still remains so much at the letter of the law, rather than of the spirit. I find it disempowering overall, even if at moments it's truly inspiring or enlightening. Like, do beeswax crayons really have a significantly different color saturation than regular crayons and therefore impact a child's sight in a meaningful way? As a Waldorf "insider," those are not the battles I want to be fighting. Oh, and by the way, this *is* the book where the author calls any amount of TV "poison." Cheers!

[Claire · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is an interesting guide to developing routines and environments that encourage children to develop into whole, well balanced adults. It is a sweet, nurturing approach to childhood, but is a little to gentle, inasmuch as I got bored and couldn't finish it. It may prove more useful when my daughter is older.

[Kit · Rating 3 out of 5]

I thought it would be more useful for people not attending a Waldorf school - but clearly it was directed at families utilizing that type of school. In addition, a lot of the recommendations were too vague to be practical or I had read elsewhere.

[Shalinee · Rating 4 out of 5]

First parenting book I ever read from start to finish...despite Kavya's attempts to hide the book from me twice (meaning of that act not lost on me!). Good introduction to Waldorf early childhood education. Even if you filter out the Waldorfian references, it's a good parenting book.

[Ginger · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of useful activities for engaging the senses. I love love love the tip for getting kids to cooperate. You use the phrase "you may..." and it is working for my willful three year old

[Mackenzie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not totally convinced Waldorf is the way to go but I did glean lots of ideas from this book. Great sections on outdoor time, rhythms and doll play.

[Cam Cam · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tính ra thì cuốn này làm khá tốt mệnh đề nhập môn giáo dục Steiner.

Ưu điểm: Ngắn gọn, dễ đọc dễ hiểu. Hình thức các trao đổi giữa giáo viên và các vị phụ huynh thú vị, nhiều câu hỏi của phụ huynh siêu chạm luôn. Quan trọng nhất là có reading list được tuyển chọn để từ đó người đọc có thể đi vào tìm hiểu sâu thêm về giáo duc Steiner.

Nhược điểm: Hơi ngắn quá, một số phần giải đáp vấn đề bị chung chung, cảm giác câu trả lời không thỏa mãn lắm. Những phần phụ lục các bài đồng dao cho em bé không áp dụng được ở Việt Nam.

Một số takeaway quan trọng mà mình nhớ:
- Trẻ em những năm đầu đời rất cần hơi ấm (cả về nghĩa đen và nghĩa bóng) và nhịp điệu. Nhịp điệu ở đây gắn liền với tính predictability: biết một thứ nằm ở đâu (sự gọn gàng), biết đến giờ/ngày/tháng/mùa/năm này điều gì sẽ xảy ra, và biết trình tự thực hiện một việc (tắm-ăn-đọc truyện-ngủ)
- Việc nắm được các mốc phát triển của trẻ là rất quan trọng để không over hay under-expect. Cả 2 việc này đều nguy hiểm. Ví dụ quan trọng, cho trẻ quyền tự do lựa chọn - như cách rất nhiều phụ huynh đang làm vì cho rằng như vậy sẽ empower trẻ - thực tế lại là việc không nên vì ở giai đoạn nhất định này, trẻ em vẫn cần được đặt trong kỉ luật và giới hạn nhất định của người lớn. Khi trẻ hỏi "tại sao", giải thích cho trẻ về vấn đề một cách chính xác theo khoa học hay logic của người lớn cũng là không cần thiết vì sẽ phá vỡ trí tưởng tượng và chất thơ trong trẻo của trẻ.
- Thay vì cấm hay phủ định 1 việc làm của trẻ, hãy cho trẻ biết cách làm đúng. Nếu trẻ đang sử dụng năng lượng của mình một cách tiêu cực, hãy điều hướng năng lượng đó sang việc làm tích cực. Ví dụ, nếu trẻ phá đồ chơi, thì thay vì nói "con ko được phá đồ", hãy hướng dẫn trẻ cách chơi đồ chơi. Nếu trẻ sử dụng bạo lực, hãy hướng năng lực bạo lực đó vào việc xây dựng hay "phá hủy" gì đó một cách ý nghĩa. (Đoạn này làm mình nhớ lại trong truyện Totochan, khi Totochan đào bới hết phần đất cống lên để tìm cái ví, thay vì cấm cản, thầy hiệu trưởng chỉ bảo Totochan rằng hãy lấp lại chỗ đất đã đào xong khi tìm thấy xong, và em đã làm như vậy)
- Trẻ em học bằng cách bắt chước, và giờ chơi chính là giờ học của trẻ. Việc cho trẻ chơi những thứ mô phỏng lại hoạt động của người lớn sẽ giúp ích hơn nhiều những thứ chơi "chỉ để chơi". Ví dụ: chơi búp bê, chơi với cái bát cái nồi thì hơn là chơi một cái ô tô điều khiển từ xa.
- "Những gì tôi chạm vào cũng chạm vào tôi".

[Phuong Vy Le · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cuốn sách làm mình soi chiếu lại nhiều tuổi thơ, nhất là những năm đầu đời bên cạnh gia đình. Mình nhận ra 'nhịp điệu' của mình bây giờ được ảnh hưởng bởi giai đoạn đầu như thế nào, và thấm thía khi cô viết về tầm quan trọng trong việc quan sát và thiết lập nhịp điệu cho trẻ. Quả thật, mình lớn lên, cứ ngỡ là hiểu chính mình, nhưng không hẳn; có những hạt mầm trong tiềm thức và vô thức đã được nuôi lớn từ bối cảnh ngày bé.

Sách nói về sự lớn lên của bé từ 0-7 tuổi, không chỉ về mặt thể lý mà còn tâm lý. Nó, với mình, như một cửa ngõ để re-parent lại cho cô bé ở trong mình. Mình nghĩ ai cũng nên đọc, không chỉ là giáo viên mầm non hay làm cha mẹ, bởi trước khi dạy ai hay làm cha mẹ, chúng ta đã có sẵn 1 đứa trẻ bên trong cần được hiểu và cần được yêu thương trở lại.

Cô Barbara kể bằng những minh chứng cụ thể và kinh nghiệm nuôi dạy trẻ hằng ngày, không phải là lý thuyết mơ hồ, vầy nên chắc dễ hiểu cho hầu hết tất thảy.

P.s
1/ Sách có 1 bản lược trích & lược dịch tiếng Việt của nhóm giáo viên trường Sunflower, lưu hành nội bộ. Nếu bạn nào tiếp cận và xin chia sẻ (cho mục đích cá nhân), chắc sẽ ổn.
2/ Sách nằm trong khung tiếp cận của Steiner education. Cơ mà, mình nghĩ chúng ta không nên dính mắc trong phương thức tiếp cận này nọ. Đọc để hiểu, còn vận dụng thì tùy nghi.

[Kirbie Parker · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good book that is easy to read. It reinforced some things I learned in other Waldorf books while also showing me some new things (like breaking down the 12 senses). It would have been nice to have a bit more "how-to" information when it comes to nourishing the 12 senses, but I'm assuming another book in my "waldorf" pile will help me with that. Some things in the discipline chapter actually rubbed me the wrong way. I personally believe in and have success offering choices to my son. Of course I agree that too many choices can be negative but I think the author was a bit dramatic about it lol.

[Thinh Vu · Rating 5 out of 5]

Một cuốn sách thú vị với nhiều chỉ dẫn cho các bậc cha mẹ trong cách chăm sóc trẻ thuận tự nhiên với đầy tình yêu thương. Các bạn sẽ được làm quen với khái niệm Nhịp điệu, Hơi ấm và chăm sóc 12 giác quan của trẻ theo quan điểm giáo dục Steiner. Việc xây dựng kỷ luật cho trẻ thông qua những hành động, thái độ của người lớn để tạo hình mẫu cho trẻ bắt chước tới khi trẻ có thái độ tự giác cũng là những chia sẻ khá thú vị cho người lần đầu làm bố như mình.

[Hannah Grinestaff · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like to spend some time in the summer reading about different education philosophies and this is a fast introduction to Waldorf. I hadn’t realized the Waldorf philosophy is essentially based on a religion by Rudolph Steiner, and there are some interesting things that stem from that. I enjoy the Waldorf approach to children’s play being their work, and also their emphasis on the importance of home life.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

We are not a Waldorf family. We use an eclectic blend of several parenting and homeschooling methods, so I read this to get a bit more familiar with Waldorf. There are some things I really like, and others I don’t.
Great book if you are a Waldorf family. If not, maybe get it from the library.

[Helin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Genel olarak beklediğim derinliği bulamamış olsam da konuya iyi bir giriş kitabı olduğunu düşünüyorum. Kolay okunuyor, anne babalardan gelen sorular kısmı ile rahat bir ton yakalamış. Faydalı olabileceğine inandığım önerilere de rastladım. Waldorf'u merak edenlere tavsiye edilir.

[Amanda Smagley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very insightful for anthroposophical perspective of child development birth through seven, but wish it had been more practical- such as, sample daily rhythms, how to do meal times, list of age appropriate chores, etc.

[tessa · Rating 3 out of 5]

some things were pretty basic knowledge, but i learned a couple of pretty valuable things…..one simple thing that i learned was a new way to speak to children when i want to redirect a negative behavior (this is already helping drastically in my job as a preschool teacher)

[Anne Hammond · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short, easy read. I thought it was a good balancing act for gentle parenting. The chapter “Creative Discipline” was especially helpful. Rhythms and boundaries help children feel safe— that’s the lasting impression I came away with.

[Kristen Iworsky · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy read. 3.5 stars.

[Victoria Ascue · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I ever have a child, this book will definitely be a night table staple for many many years. In the meantime, I will buy it for all my friends expecting little humans, or already raising some!

[Valerie Brett · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good practical book for Waldorf parents—the one thing that you have to know going into these Waldorf books is that it’s really a spiritual philosophy (not research/science based).

[Karlie · Rating 4 out of 5]

A sweet, short intro to Waldorf education. I enjoyed this and will think about its suggestions for a long time.

[Farai H · Rating 5 out of 5]

Easy to read , helpful , emphasis on rhythm , warmth , some resources . Good start. I’m sure I’ll refer to it again .

[Kelly Esborn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 - easy read. I particularly liked the chapter on creative discipline. And have started to add “you may” to my 2.5 yr old w some good effect!

[Arumi · Rating 3 out of 5]

Surprised that I didn't like this book more than I did. I've been reading about Waldorf principles for early childhood, and have liked many of them so far. However, this book delves so much into pseudoscience that I wasn't able to recover the parts of Waldorf which intrigue me. It's important to remember that Steiner was much more of a philosopher than an expert in childhood development - and that most of his "theories" are based solely on his own musings, not any sort of fact. (He also has some worrying opinions about reincarnation - the quality of which he believes to be tied to race/skin color, but that's another subject entirely)

Definitely some interesting content for those interested in Waldorf, but overall too heavily leaning on the pseudoscience side for my tastes.

[WhizKid · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ms.Gun let me borrow during the first week of school so that I can have a better understanding of the nursery and teaching practices. My husband wrapped it nicely with brown paper so it stays clean (He's the best). I've been reading it during my commute.

"To all children everywhere especially those who have been our greatest teachers"