A Summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People

by Wolley Publishing

This is a brief summary of how to win friends and influence people

Genres: Self Help, Business, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Psychology, Relationships, Personal Growth

10 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 5, 2011

Reviews

[Claude Vertu · Rating 3 out of 5]

There’s no denying it; the book is quite good. It’s filled with logical wisdom and entertaining anecdotes all wrapped up in the warm, fatherly tone of a good man who clearly cared about the wellbeing of his fellow man. I’m quite confident that at the time of publishing, and for several decades thereafter, the book was a truly powerful sales tool, as well as a potent means of avoiding personal loneliness. Nonetheless, in current times, I feel the book would be more suitably entitled “How to fake friendship and manipulate people”.
I love Dale Carnegie and everything for which he stood, and posthumously stands, but if you’re manipulating people to win their friendship, then you’re not their friend, and they’ll never truly be yours. Yes it’s important to bring the best of yourself to the surface and be kind, considerate and even encouraging, as well as avoiding being the unpleasant individual we all can be at times, but complimenting people on their shirt or “head of hair” in order to get them to like you is tantamount to feeding sugar cubes to the hungry; it’s not nourishing and it’s damaging in the long run. This tactic is a wonderful and proven sales tactic, and a great way to appeal to one's ego, but if it gains you friends, you may want to re-examine your perception of what it means to be a friend.
For what it was at the time of its creation; cutting edge to say the very least, this book deserves 5 stars. However, for its misleading title and obsolete understanding and perspective of “friendship” in the current population in need of true friendship, connection, trust and love, I’ve removed two stars. It’s still worth the read for anybody who wants to improve upon their social graces, but it definitely shouldn’t be the last book they read on the topic.

[Hayley · Rating 5 out of 5]

The douchey-sounding title of this book made me avoid it for a long time. I'm not really interested in being nice exclusively for my own personal gain; however, at a certain point it becomes a practical step to realize that making an effort to look at something from another person's point of view (even if they don't deserve it) is often necessary to move situations along. This is a really well-done book -- partly, I think, because it was written back when in order to publish, you had to be coherent and have substance. Most self-help I loathe with a fiery passion, but this one is pretty wise (if, at times, only slightly sociopathic).

[Derek Wong]

A management classic. My friends network increase from 100 to 5000.

Don't criticize, condemn or complain. Arouse in the other person an eager want. Be a good listener. Talk about your own mistakes first before critizing other people. Lead.

[Bianca A. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short and sweet with a powerful and clear message. I've been recommending it to everyone I know since I've read it. Should definitely be on your list of books to read before you die!
I read this book during my first vacation in the Philippines right around the time I got engaged so for some reason it had a strong place in my association. I was excited to find an English copy in one of their book stores. Back then I wasn't active on Goodreads so now I'm updating old book accordingly for those of you who follow my updates.
It really taught me the most powerful lesson that I have which I still employ today: how to listen and be actively interested in the other, instead of always pushing your own ego into any interactions. Definitely a 5/5

[Nika · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is not about making friends. Instead, Carnegie, through a multitude of anecdotes and historical moments, teaches how to elevate yourself as a leader through elevating the people around you. If you want to improve your leadership, conflict resolution, and networking skills, 10/10.

[Robert Miller · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very short concise read. Can read it twice in 30 minutes

[Aimee · Rating 4 out of 5]

A classic of the self help genre. I had always been turned off by the title of this book, however when my book club came up with the theme of self help for our April meeting I decided to give it a shot. This book holds a copyright of1936, and while I read the revised 1981 edition, updated in part by his daughter Dorthy Carnegie, it still has that antiquated, amiable tone of that era. Surprisingly, despite the tone, I found most everything still relevant to human relations today, being in the workplace or in the home. I guess this is what makes it a classic and still quote worthy some 40 years later. My copy is highlighted and filled with notes and post its. I plan to read it again and recommend it to anyone interested in improving relationships in their life.

[Sambasivam Mani · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this book will change the way we treat others. Instead of talking about themselves people who read this book will start thinking from others point of view and put themselves into their shoes. If you want to be a conversationist then this is the best book for you.

Author highlights the importance of winning friends and how to influence them. Starting with a gentle smile and avoiding Criticism are most important things. He explains how a bad situation can be handled in a better way so everyone around you feels better. I feel that making friends will be easy after reading this book. If anyone wants to be a leader, better salesman or a better human being should concentrate the list of points highlighted in this book.

[Gisela Hausmann · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is the ultimate classic.

If I could take only one "how to make friends - be social - have people skills" book to a lonely island, where inevitably I'd better succeed becoming true friends with anybody, who'd swim ashore it would be this book. I'd rather lose the books I myself have written than "How to Win Friends & Influence People".

I bought my edition more than a decade ago, I read it once a year. It is that good.

Gisela Hausmann, author & blogger

[Vignesh Baskaran · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such an awesome book with lot of points which can be incorporated in our daily instances.

His narration with an example made it very better and i see some changes in the way i deal with people now after reading the book

I became more polite andd started thinking from other shoes

it should be read then and there to completely incorporate the principles into our life

[Hannah Sergelen · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best book I have read so far!

[Jacob Duncan · Rating 5 out of 5]

[How to Win Friends and Influence People] is definitely one of the best books out there. Dale Carnegie does a terrific job explaining how to live your life in a better and more rewarding way. He uses examples of people throughout history and even modern day folks. One particular part of the book i enjoyed was when Dale mentions a quote that is said by Benjamin Franklin. The quote is "I will speak ill of no man and speak all the good I know of everybody". My favorite part about reading this book was the lesson of treating people positively and the reward that comes from it. This book would be a fantastic choice for anyone that's wanting/willing to learn something from it. There is so much variety in the examples given and yet they all teach the same lesson. The only type of person I would not recommend this book to is someone thats not willing to let it influence them. It may be a hard book to understand for younger children due to the structure. There is no inappropriate content so I would definitely consider it a safe read. One book I would compare this one to is [The Success Principles: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be] because of the similar messages they share. They both focus on ways to make people better and more successful. However, the styles in which the message is shared are kind of different. Overall I really liked this book and like I mentioned earlier I'd recommend it for anyone. Another cool quote I saw was "Any fool can critisize, condemn and complain--and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving". How cool is that!!!? I believe thats something everyone should hear.

[Radhika Saimbi · Rating 5 out of 5]

How to win friends and influence people?? By Dale Carnegie

Last month after reading Robin Sharma’s book wanted to explore more of this genre and this book is a treasure I must say!!
It was published in 1937 and since then it has been one of the best self help book and I will tell you why it is so!!

Book has been basically divided into four parts
0. Fundamental techniques in Handling People
0. Six Ways to Make People Like You
0. How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
0. Be a Leader: How to Change People without Giving Offence or Resentment

These four marvellous chapters will teach you everything you wanted to learn for your personal as well as professional development. Numerous examples are for understanding how our ‘words’ change our situations without being mean and selfish.
His narration is very simple which will give a reminder of many practical points which we miss.
Motive of the book is definitely to make you a better, kind and successful person. These kind of books are meant to be read regularly so that you can get full knowledge and wisdom.

One lesson which I will surely take from this book is choosing kindness and sincerity over everything else.

My favourite quotes from the book are
“If you argue and rankle and contradict, you may achieve a victory sometimes; but it will be an empty victory because you will never get your opponents good will” by Ben Franklin

“God himself, sir, does not propose to judge man until the end of his days.”
Why should you and I??
By Dr. Johnson
All I can say is that go ahead and read this book!! It wont disappoint you!!

[Melinda Christensen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I learned so much as I read this book and put its principles into practice, and would recommend it to anyone! The principles include "six ways to make people like you"; "how to win people to your way of thinking"; and "how to change people without giving offense or arousing resentment".
"I have no right to say or do anything that diminishes a man in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him, but what he thinks of himself. Hurting a man for his dignity is a crime."
"I don't blame you one iota for feeling as you do. If I were you I would undoubtedly feel just as you do."
"Jesus said: "Agree with thy adversary quickly." "In other words don't argue with your customer or your spouse or your adversary. Don' tell them that they are wrong, don't get them stirred up. Use a little diplomacy."
"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you."
"If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as your own."

[Devin]

“If you want to learn what people want, read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. [8] When a friend recommended this book, I couldn't believe he was serious. But he insisted it was good, so I read it, and he was right. It deals with the most difficult problem in human experience: how to see things from other people's point of view, instead of thinking only of yourself.
Most smart people don't do that very well. But adding this ability to raw brainpower is like adding tin to copper. The result is bronze, which is so much harder that it seems a different metal.”

“Buy an old copy from the 1940s or 50s instead of the current edition, which has been rewritten to suit present fashions. The original edition contained a few unPC ideas, but it's always better to read an original book, bearing in mind that it's a book from a past era, than to read a new version sanitized for your protection.”
- Paul graham

[Margaret Chen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book (full version, not summary) contains common sense advice for improving interactions with people. Most of the given advice is based on considering other people's point of view and their concerns before stating what you really want to express. I concur that this is a respectful approach. However, some of the examples given in the book seem to be overly tactful and even bordering on manipulative--treating people as if they act purely only on emotion not on intelligence. At the conclusion of the book, I felt a more appropriate title for the book might be "How to massage other people's egos to get what you want". However, this book might help people who are persistently verbally negative or argumentative change their ways. I still gave it 4 stars because the advice will lead to avoiding unnecessary conflict.

[Guilty Kiwi · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book must be curse just recently I suddenly have many people who wants to be friends with me, I was coping with my mental health and hide myself in my room for a month and during that time I found this book and read, and when I decided to finally get out of my comfort zone everyone wanted to be friends with me. I like my new life this really helped me out, Thanks Dale Carnegie and the editor of this book even in your death bed you're name and good deeds still remain in this earth. You thought me something that the adults in my life failed to teach.

[Naomi Cole · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found certain chapters were better than others when it came to helpful information. This is a great book if you meet new people frequently, especially if they are primarily formal settings. I will probably read certain parts of this book again although I don't think I'll read all of it in one go again because I feel like some of the pointers are pretty obvious and certain chapters were quite lengthy and got kind of boring by the fifth example.

[Mariano Abilleira · Rating 4 out of 5]

To be taken with a grain of salt.

Some of the stories quoted here seem to be to far-fetched, almost made up, to actually fit the advice that precedes them. The author's style and words are outdated, as are the references. However, it makes it a charming little read; and some of the concepts explained here deserve real attention and may be of use in day to day relationships.

[Irish · Rating 5 out of 5]

As an introvert who’d like to improve my latent abilities in business, human relations and communications, this book was really helpful. It gave practical examples which was easy to remember. I think that applying this will makes me a better person because it taught me to be lavish in praise and slow in criticism.

[Aimée Drost · Rating 5 out of 5]

It basically helps you to be nice. It helped me a lot with communicating. With my mom, my boss, and everyone else. I have a better understanding now of why people act the way they do and simple tricks I can use to make their lives and mine easier.
Only read the book once, but I'm sure I'll reread some chapters over time.

[Ales · Rating 4 out of 5]

According to my expectations! This gives me another point of view on how we interact with the others, especially in terms of organizational occasion. Probably this needs to be read more than twice to understand the aim that has been accounted by several big names, such as Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Rosevelt.

[Gee Lyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's an amazing book, if you really try to take in what it's trying to teach you, which is a new way of thinking rather than the misconception that it aims to manipulate people. As it's constantly mentioned in the book, you get to wonder why everyone's not already doing what is being taught here, but I guess it's been the bad habit that we just couldn't break.

[Shannon Wells · Rating 5 out of 5]

A really great book for those who have trouble with leadership skills or communicating with others. It truly helps you develop the ability to see the good in every person. If I could sum it up to one sentence, I'd say that this book helps you breathe life into people by understanding people on a deeper level - once you fully grasp the concepts. Great for business owners and entrepreneurs as well.

[Tony Britt · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of those books I wish I read as a young person, & wish I had revisited it at least monthly, & reread it at least every year. It's not a manipulative trick, it's common sense but it takes practice, practice, practice to do it well. The core is the Golden Rule, but the secret is how to employ it in every single thing you do.

[Froylan Platt · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's always great to read Dale Carnegie, good stories, pretty entertained and always something to learn from it, I love it.
A lot of social intelligence in this book, good advice on how to have better results with the people you work with.
I'm sure you will enjoy it!.

[Kim · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wasn’t sure about this short read at first, but I’m so glad I read it! In 30 minutes you can get a few really good pointers to use in everyday life with people. I highly recommend it. We all need refreshers in dealing with people!

[Abby Markus · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a classic. If you want to understand how to work with people, this is the place to start. It will be beneficial in your relationships with your partner, friends, family, co-workers, clients, people at the grocery store…everyone!

[Edgar camilo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nice classic book, when you read it you'll feel is an old book, nevertheless is the basis of modern self-help books. Is not the easiest to read, but if you have some experience with this kind of books, you'll enjoy it.

[Rupa Htun · Rating 5 out of 5]

No matter how old you are, no matter which industry you work , regardless of where you live in the world, THIS BOOK IS GOING TO GUIDE YOU and make your life EASIER, BETTER AND MAKE PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR POLITENESS.