Home is Where the Start Is: How Your Family Made You, and How You Can Make Yourself Even Better

by Richard Hogan

Families are complicated, even the 'normal' ones.

Our early years at home are when we lay down the blueprint for being a partner, parent, sibling, friend, colleague, neighbour, and even a citizen. Home is where we become who we are.

Even the best of childhoods is imperfect. And if there were difficulties - whether due to simple personality clashes, or issues such as authoritarian parenting, family break-up, illness, loss or addiction - it may be an ongoing struggle to manage our moods and emotions, though we may have no idea why. Psychotherapist Richard Hogan has seen it all when it comes to how the early years shape us - and he knows we can work on ourselves to rewrite the blueprint. In this book he draws on extensive research and thousands of conversations in the therapy room to explain how.

Packed full of eye-opening and liberating ideas, fascinating case studies and practical tools, Home is Where the Start Is also includes a remarkable account of Richard's own challenges as a child and teenager. He knows exactly what it's like to face the past squarely, grapple with the legacy of childhood unhappiness and work on creating a better future.

Home is Where the Start Is will help you become the best version of yourself you can be. And it is an invaluable source of advice for parents to give your child the best possible start.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Self Help

256 pages, Paperback

Published June 7, 2024

Reviews

[Mirjam · Rating 5 out of 5]

I struggle to find popular psychology books that I can truly connect with and find engaging to read. They can often seem inaccessible, dry or condescending. By using his own experience with trauma and healing, the author brings a compelling narrative into the mix that makes the content much more digestible and frames these somewhat daunting topics as achievable and worthwhile. The subjects that are discussed cover a broad range of topics from attachment styles to trauma and personality types. So even if the core topic of family dynamics isn't one that you're extremely interested in, the book mentions many more subjects that are well presented and compelling.
I'd recommend this to anyone looking for a pleasant and engaging read about pop psych with simple yet profound themes and strategies.

[Siobhán Lucid · Rating 4 out of 5]

It took me a whiles to read I was going through a doom scrolling stage but really good take aways that kind of looped back to my doom scrolling. You're brain and thoughts are like an algorithm so what you put in you get out🤣

[kimmypng · Rating 5 out of 5]

The only reason why I bought this book was because I, Myself had been struggling a lot with my family. I felt that most issues that revolved in my family all revolved within a loop. I wanted to get out of that loop. I was desperate for answers and I was willing to understand its causes. I honestly had no clue what book would help me with that. I found this book on the shelve in the bookstore and the title persuaded me to buy it, without knowing what exactly to aspect. I honestly am saying this from the depth of my heart, this is one of the best purchases that I have ever made in my life. This book gave me more than just answers, it gave me solutions, overviews, analyses and more. If I met Richard Hogan in real life I would absolutely let him know how his book changed my life. As I am writing this now to readers who are not sure whether to purchase this book, I definitely recommend. I haven't stopped recommending this book to everyone I know and it has been a week since I finished it. This book might be a book to put on your top shelf so other people may read it too, so other people can find the answers and solutions to a peaceful family too.

[Tania Ramonde · Rating 5 out of 5]

La primera mitad del libro la devoré. Está lleno de conceptos sorprendentes y conexiones inesperadas que, sin embargo, tienen todo el sentido. La segunda parte la leí más "a ratitos", en parte porque sentí que gran parte de lo que el autor quería compartir ya estaba dicho.
Si embargo, continué aprendiendo, subrayando y anotando.

Un libro excelente para todos los que estamos haciendo ese trabajo de mejora, y especialmente los que somos p/madres. Me ha encantado.

[Anna Stewart · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a great read ! I am honestly going to recommend this book to all my friends and family as, even though I thought that I don’t need self-help book, it gave me such an insight into my own childhood experiences that I was stunned. Such a light read as well, not overwhelming with information, author’s got great sense of humour and I felt like he’s sitting right next to me. 5 stars 🌟

[Christopher · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent topic and coverage of general and specific family dynamics that pertain to just about everyone. This author is obviously an expert in his field, having demonstrated lucidity in this book that is personal both from his own family of origin and his psychotherapy practice.

[Shane Colton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book. Nice flow to it. Not too intensive but also not overly waffly and abstract. Well worth a read.

[Stephanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review to follow

[Aisshers · Rating 2 out of 5]

Love listening to Richard Hogan on the radio and hearing about his background but really thought it would be more informative in terms of parenting.

[Kevin Murphy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book, I really enjoy anything from this author and love his segments on the Brendan O Connor show on RTE radio 1.

[Maite Delneuville · Rating 4 out of 5]

‘Our fear of things turning out badly can cause us to behave in ways that make sure things turn out badly, thus confirming the truth of our beliefz’