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My Isl@m: How Fundamentalism Stole My Mind---and Doubt Freed My Soul

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Amir Ahmad Nasr is a young Muslim man with something explosive in his a computer connected to the Internet. And it has the power to help ignite a revolution and blow apart the structures of ignorance and politicized indoctrination that too often still imprison the Muslim mind. Part memoir, part passionate call for liberty, reason and doing work that matters, My Isl@m tells the tale of how the internet opened the eyes and heart of a once fearful young Muslim to a world beyond the dogmatism of his upbringing, and recounts his transformation into a defiant digital activist. In his honest, provocative, and courageous debut, Nasr–a popular Afro-Arab Sudanese blogger–steps out from behind the curtain of anonymity and emerges as a voice of a new generation of tech-savvy liberal Muslims. Set in war-ravaged Sudan, oil-rich Qatar, multi-cultural Malaysia, the United States, Turkey and the new frontiers of cyberspace, My Isl@m is a fascinating prelude to the Arab Spring and a disarming and uplifting tale of doubt, soul-searching, Islam, and finding freedom in the Middle East and the rest of the Muslim world. A poignant, honest, and uplifting memoir of how blogging and the internet opened the eyes and heart of one young Muslim man to a world beyond his religious fundamentalist upbringing.

336 pages, Hardcover

First published June 11, 2013

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Amir Ahmad Nasr

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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
Profile Image for Tina.
54 reviews4 followers
September 4, 2013
Rating: 2.5 stars

I won this book in a First Reads giveaway back in February, and only now managed to find some time to read it (incidentally, right after finishing Salman Rushdie’s memoir).

My Isl@m details Nasr’s “evolution” from a devout and unquestioning Muslim to a rabid atheist and, finally, to a Sufi devotee.

I’m generally not a fan of people who “re-embrace” (or, as Nasr, puts it, merely “embrace,” because, having been born into Islam, he hadn’t actually embraced the religion in the first place) Islam by “becoming” Sufis. It seems to me that Sufism is often perceived as a sort of “easy” and “soft” version of Islam that you can opt into and turn towards when you’re tired of “hardcore” Islam. This mindset does a disservice to the Islamic tradition, to the Sufi tradition. Sufism isn’t for the faint of heart, and it certainly shouldn’t be treated as if it were simply one of many “New Age” traditions, as if it has no grounding in the Islamic tradition. Many people believe that in Sufism, traditional Islamic things such as ritual prayer and fasting do not “need” to be followed, but this is not the case (see also: why the commodification of Sufism vis a vis Rumi exploitation is bad).
Anyways, Nasr raises some important points in his book – for instance, the anti-black racism that is present in Arab cultures; the multitude of interpretations of Islam that exist amongst its adherents (compare Nasr’s parents to his schoolteachers); the interplay between religion and culture that differentiates Saudi Muslims from Malaysian Muslims, Iranian Muslims from American Muslims. Also – the exchange of ideas via internet outlets like blogging; the importance of virtual interactions in allowing us to engage in and learn about things that we might otherwise not be exposed to.

Nasr’s “love affair” with doubt, which he personifies as a beautiful woman with whom he practically has a sexual encounter with, has a prominent place in the book. In this section, during which he rejects religious belief in general, Nasr refers to Dawkins, Hitchens, et al as his “heroes”. I’m not a fan of Dawkins and his ilk for several reasons – they can be obnoxious, and are often prone to the same sort of “fire and brimstone sermons” that make them no different than the religious fundamentalists that they so abhor. Also, it might be said that they encourage a type of thought that is no less unquestioning and uncritical than that which is espoused by religious fundamentalism. When you buy into everything that Dawkins et al writes, are you really thinking critically? Are you really questioning, or are you merely becoming a parrot for a different cause?

In the last section of the book, Nasr finally comes to his own terms with Islam; indeed, it’s a sort of reconciliation. In the epilogue, he mentions becoming a follower of the Sufi path, which I have issues with for reasons already mentioned. Here, I think Nasr came to realize that the opinions about Islam that he came to hold while infatuated with Doubt were limited in their perspective. For instance, while in conversation with a hijab-wearing Egyptian blogger, he mistakenly assumed that she was a supporter of the Muslim Brotherhood, and was stunned to learn that she preferred that religion and politics remain separated.

This is important – it’s a warning against making assumptions, of course, but it also tells us that there are an infinite possibility of opinions and perspectives within a given tradition. Though Nasr previously saw things as a sort of dichotomy – Islamic fundamentalism vs almost militant atheism –, I think he eventually came to realize that, in reality, the situation is more like a spectrum, with a wide range of opinions and beliefs.
128 reviews14 followers
August 5, 2018
I literally regret reading this book.

It's a trainwreck of a book about Islam. So much prosaic internal monologue and grandiosity. The writing style is so self-aggrandizing.

He was never an Islamic fundamentalist like the book promotes; he was just raised in a conservative Islamic environment as a CHILD. It's basically a history of his life through blogging and he has this strange propensity for the worst views on Islam and other things.

He believes in conspiracy theories about how al-Ghazali singlehandedly ruined Islam and Asharis are enemies of progressivism and reason. He likes Irshad Manji, the self-proclaimed "reformer" of Islam. The problem with people like Manji is they self-promote themselves as grandiose reformers of Islam when they actually come off as antipathic to Islam and Muslims and consistently side with Islamaphobes. Then, he goes into a phase where he loves Sam Harris, Hitchens and Dawkins, literally maybe some of the worst people I ever think of to be taking Islamic knowledge from.

Finally, he does another 180 and decides to become a Sufi and falls for weird, pseudo-scientific ideas about how humanity exists in certain phases like traditionalism, modernism, and postmodernism as if philosophical beliefs are biological?

The reason people like this book is that it tells them exactly what they want to believe about Islam and Muslims. Muslims are backwards, ignorant, despotic, racist, anti-Semitic, homophobic and close-minded. In short, Muslims come from an inferior cultural and religious background, and it's up to Muslims to adopt superior Western ideas and then reject Islam or re-invent a watered-down, appeasing version of Islam "for the modern age." Not to downplay his real experience with racism, but this is why it seems so many reviewers love this book despite it being a terrible intro to Islam and rather boring at that and not particularly well-written either.

This is a biography of a guy summarizing books no one wants to read, or really should read, and who spends way too much time on the internet. So skip this book and watch cat videos and argue with people on social media.
Profile Image for Kristin.
942 reviews34 followers
October 11, 2013
I very rarely do not finish a book, and this was a book I finished about halfway and then simply couldn't bring myself back to finishing it. I thought the book, based on the title, would be about a Muslim's experience with fundamentalism, and then a return to "the Middle Path." Instead I found this book mostly about the author's experiences with online Islam, and his relationship with the online world. If you are Muslim, and familiar with the multiple Muslim websites/groups/communities online, there is nothing new contained in this book. No struggle to reconcile extreme views with life experiences, etc., etc. as one would expect with this book's title.
Profile Image for Amy.
6 reviews
April 6, 2013
I received a free advanced reader copy of My Isl@m from a GoodReads giveaway, and am so happy that I had the opportunity to read this engaging memoir by Sudanese blogger and activist, Amir Ahmad Nasr. I thoroughly enjoyed reading Amir's journey from his boyhood in Qatar to his long struggle and eventual reconciliation with his faith in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. Some readers may find some of this struggle to be repetitive and frustrating, wondering when he is going to get over it. However, I think it was a very accurate depiction of anyone going through a true journey of that sort. I was surprised to find myself identifying with him in key points. Having grown up in the Catholic Church, also quite rigid and ritual-bound as Islam can be, I myself had doubts followed by a break from organized religion altogether before coming to a very similar place of reconciliation between reason and faith. I believe others will identify as well.

It was also very illuminating as a Westerner to read about the online mobilization and activism of the Arab world. As Amir points out in the book, the U.S. is often slow to pick up on these things and quick to move on to a new story. I live in a city with a very significant Muslim population and have been fortunate to work closely with many of its men, women and children. And I've been discouraged by the extreme prejudice that I've heard come from otherwise reasonable people when it comes to this population - believing that Islam is inherently more violent than any other religion, that all young Muslims are at risk of being terrorists, etc. Many Americans would do well to acquaint themselves with the world introduced by Amir Ahmad Nasr, to see that if young voices such as these are nurtured and encouraged, a very different world could arise. I was recently struck by the Portland case of a young Somali man whom the American government encouraged into terrorism. Would he have committed the act without government aid? Maybe. Should he be punished for trying to bomb a Christmas tree lighting ceremony? Certainly. But just imagine if we put half as much effort into celebrating voices such as Amir's. The book also shed light on the power of cognitive dissonance - once Amir began to meet people that he was previously told were "infidels", he saw that they were clearly not what he had been led to believe. Positive exposure to the "other" is a wonderful method of breaking down barriers of prejudice.

My Isl@m ends on a very hopeful note, with the author encouraging us to remember that revolutions don't happen overnight. He also provides a beautifully written epilogue with a short list of recommended books for the reader who wants to delve deeper into the subjects raised throughout the book. Overall, a very enjoyable and eye-opening read.

Profile Image for miteypen.
837 reviews64 followers
December 26, 2014
The writing was a little amateurish at times but overall was clearly and honestly written. The book was about more than the author's struggle with his faith; it was also about how he got involved in expressing his views about Islam and politics and promoting reform and change through social media and the Internet (the clue is in the "@" in the word "Islam"). He includes a lot of information about how the Arab Spring of 2011 came about and who the key players were in the digital world. He also introduces philosophical arguments that he has found helpful in his search for a religion that he can live with.
Profile Image for Ruth Charchian.
221 reviews
January 16, 2016
This was an interesting read. Nasr clearly left out the much more controversial aspects of his falling away from Islam; what it meant to become an infidel and Shariah law. This was, therefore, to the unsuspecting, uninformed person a dishonest, craftily written, bluff bent on persuading the reader that Islam is a peaceful religion. I don't doubt his struggle with it over the years or his struggle with religion. That was undoubtedly difficult.

I don't want to give away the ending. If you pick up this book to read, beware. Because of the major pieces he left out of his struggle over the many years, I find him to be untrustworthy, dishonest, and underhanded in his story writing.
Profile Image for Dolly.
205 reviews13 followers
April 15, 2013
I won this as a Goodreads giveaway. I thought this book was amazing and is a must read for anyone analyzing their religious beliefs. The story of development of a young man's search for religious truths. As with most of us, the more you learn, the more you question, the more you need to read, the more you question. The book also helps you understand the changes going on in the middle east. Read this book.
Profile Image for Kevin.
Author 22 books28 followers
May 19, 2016
A memoir from a Sudanese Muslim who became a vocal blogger and began to question his faith. It's a fascinating exploration of faith, Islam and the current age. But it also gets bogged down in unimportant details. It's a helpful glimpse into the Muslim mind, but it wasn't as engaging as I'd hoped.
Profile Image for Paul.
12 reviews16 followers
April 14, 2013
I wanted to read something else but I was very disappointing in this book. I didn't know I signed up for this book
Profile Image for Joni.
219 reviews3 followers
December 26, 2019
I liked the premise; the execution was harder to read. Much too florid and interior monologue for me.
Profile Image for Kofi.
63 reviews23 followers
January 6, 2023
This books traces the author’s journey from being indoctrinated to breaking free from ancient traditions and finding his own voice and identity.

Nasr does a good job of drawing you in and having you share his experiences.
6 reviews
June 19, 2025
very slow paced and generally uninteresting.
Profile Image for Fred Kohn.
1,425 reviews26 followers
August 16, 2013
This is a thoroughly engaging account of a young man's journey from his conservative Islamic upbringing through doubt and anger at his native religion and his final rediscovery of the beautiful side of religion. Woven through this tapestry are wonderful glimpses into the political thinking of all kinds of Muslims. The author is an experienced writer and blogger and he uses his literary gifts marvelously. For example:

'It was a dark and humid December night close to 12 A.M. I stepped outside and walked up the hill. I could still hear the growing excitement of the small crowd I left behind at the party as they anticipated the countdown. Holding the metallic object in the grip of my hand, I too anticipated the ticks of the hand of Time. My grip tightened. "This is it, Amir. It ends here. Enough," whispered the dull breeze. Drips of sweat forming on my forehead, I smiled in delicate sorrow and giddy suspense, and felt my heart racing faster. "Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five..."

Islam means "submission," they say. Submission to what? Ah, well yes, to the will of God, one I've known too often throughout my life in fearful terms that demanded unquestioning submission and yielding to His supreme authority. Or else!

Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on where you stand, by the seconds-away, quickly-approaching dawn of 2008, I had reached a point where I simply, absolutely, and irrevocably refused to live under such submission anymore.

"Four, three, two, one," continued the happy chants at the distant party pad as I held on to the metallic object I carried. "Happy new year!"

I loosened my grip, pulled the can opener, and in an act of asserting my awakened will, I chugged down a few small gulps of warm beer. It was the first time I had ever drank alcohol.

"So this is what my friends have been bugging me to drink and try all these years?" The taste was disgusting.'
Profile Image for Dana.
2,415 reviews
July 13, 2013
I think this book should be a must read for high school and college students. Everyone else should read it too, but I think it should be required reading in schools. It may be too controversial to make it in high schools, which is sad, because I think that high school students would benefit from reading it - I recommend it for grades 11 and 12 and totally definitely for college.
The book in an intriguing and interesting story of how Amir, a Sudanese Arab living in Malaysia, entered the blog sphere when he was in college and became part of the social media events that have been transforming Muslim countries.
He tells about anti-Jewish indoctrination and hatred that was taught at one of the Muslim schools he attended as a child, which his parents disagreed with and they took him out of that school. Sadly, many Muslim schools do teach children to hate Jews and the US and to pray for their deaths.
Amir chronicles his struggles with the Muslim religion and religion in general which lead him to read many atheistic and philosophical books and articles.
In the end, he chose to participate in Sufism, the mystical branch of Islam which says that God is Love and sounds very much like it holds many of the same ideals as Christianity.
He did not explain how he reconciled himself with the wife-beater verse and others like it in the Koran.
Amir sees the internet and social media as a way to change the face of Islam and to make it a kinder, gentler, more open religion. I appreciate his youthful optimism and certainly we have seen that social media can indeed make a difference in politics.
Profile Image for char.
307 reviews5 followers
February 19, 2017
A really incredible read. The lengths Nasr has gone to reconcile his past, his ambitions, and his beliefs are phenomenal, and especially the way he lays out his past prejudices (eg anti-Semitism, homophobia) and details how he got over them gives me a lot of hope for others who are raised in traditions of hateful propaganda. I really loved the journey of his spiritual growth, as someone who is at the age to be having a lot of similar concerns (though admittedly from a completely completely different background), it was extremely relatable while still educating me about a culture I'm not familiar with. The book as a whole might be a bit inaccessible to those unfamiliar with Internet culture and blogging, I'll admit that aspect of the book didn't interest me as much as the story of his personal growth, but in an age where technological advancements and internet culture are being continually dismissed and repressed by older generations who refuse to see the internet as anything more than selfies and Facebook games, it's important to recognize the massive impact on both individual and large scales that the internet can have, and I believe Nasr does a great job of that, through his own blogging experiences, his activity in the Twitter-led revolutions throughout the Middle East, and his advocacy for freedom of information. Anyway, I really loved this book, I really learned a lot, and I'm glad that I read it at the time that I did.
Profile Image for Melle.
1,282 reviews33 followers
November 16, 2014
READ THIS BOOK. If you are a living, conscious human being walking upon this earth in this day and age, read this book. If you are a fundamentalist anything, if you are an avowed atheist, if you are a doubting agnostic, if you are someone who has never question the faith in which you were raised, read this book. Amir Ahmad Nasr's journey of faith and understanding is brilliant, life-affirming, human, and beautiful. He helps one to better understand world conflicts and international relations, and he approaches life and others and ideas with such an open, curious, caring mind. His poignant struggle with his own faith heritage and his embrace of reason and of humanity is profound and will ring true with anyone who has struggled with those same issues and has realized that the supreme higher power is love, understanding, compassion, and our own beautiful, flawed, striving humanity. Do you come to the same conclusions as the author on faith? Not necessarily, but you do appreciate the richness and vibrancy of human beings and how they get through this existence.

There is a lot more to say about this book, but, right now, I am awash in emotions and in awe. Please, read this book.
Profile Image for PRINCESS.
440 reviews13 followers
March 6, 2017
A story of how a young boy growing up in a liberal Muslim family started questioning his faith and his society, found freedom through the internet, and was part of the international blogging community that brought about the Arab Spring, toppling dictatorships across the Arab world.
A search for identity, meaning, and finally the truth. All of us are born with a belief and most of us continue with the same, some in the middle of the way change what they were believing in and some they remain on the same belief but rarely we see people go and dig for the truth of what they currently belief and after that stay strongly believing in the same belief, finding the inner peace, the comforting fact.
Profile Image for Beth.
1,179 reviews11 followers
January 1, 2015
This book is a combination memoir and study of Islam as a religion and lifestyle, as well as a history of the internet blogging that led up to the overthrow of Hosni Mubarak in Egypt and the movement know as Arab Spring. The author, Amir Nasr, was one of the original bloggers, writing as "Drima, the Sudanese Thinker."

Amir is an Arab-Sudanese who was brought up in Sudan, Qatar, and Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. His blackness made him an outsider in the Arab Islamic world, but his Islamic instruction in very traditional schools prevented him from fitting in where religion ws less stringent.

It is a fascinating and readable account of his spiritual and political journey.
Profile Image for Sarina.
1,556 reviews
November 13, 2016
Ein intelligentes, interessantes und nachdenklich stimmendes Buch. Viele Botschaften, die der Autor mit dem Buch übermittelt, fand ich schön, da einiges dabei war, was auch mir sehr wichtig ist. z.B. Dass man sich mit einem bestimmten Thema immer selbst beschäftigen und auseinandersetzen sollte, anstatt alles blind zu glauben, was einem die Medien, Eltern, Verwandte, Freunde etc. weißmachen wollen. In Sachen Religion ist ihm vor allem wichtig, dass man mit Offenheit reagiert und in Dialog miteinader tritt, um zumindest ansatzweise (auch wenn man damit nicht einverstanden ist) verstehen zu können, warum der andere diese Meinung/Weltbild etc. hat.
Profile Image for Hurayrah.
36 reviews
January 17, 2016
Just from reading this book I've learned so much about the Arab spring and my self. This was a very relatable book were I felt that the author was sincere and as confused is I am sometimes about islam. He explains islam in a way that no other other dared describe. Bit he also manage to explain why and how this wonderful religion turned upside down and became hard to understand not only by the West but by its own people.
1,544 reviews5 followers
February 2, 2014
Nasr is a philosophical, self-absorbed 20 something, so sometimes I got bored. But to see someone try to explain how his thinking about truth and where Islam fit into truth and how that thinking changed, that was inspiring. Also liked the intimate glimpse into the life of those young Muslims that were blogging as change agents.
Profile Image for Amanda Dodge.
232 reviews2 followers
November 3, 2016
Nasr did a great job of tackling a complex subject in an engaging manner. He made it light enough to be readable but defended his points with serious research. There were times that I got bogged down in the technical and walked away from it for a bit, but most of the time I was cheering him on and thought it was incredibly relatable. I definitely recommend it.
1 review1 follower
September 30, 2015
Thought-Provoking Urge to Defeat Dogmatism

Very good book. Elaborated on many themes that people will find familiar and relevant. Pragmatic outlook on avoiding the extremes in life.
Profile Image for Emily Barrett.
17 reviews1 follower
January 30, 2023
This was a cute story about a man who struggled with his identity and religion. This is a relatable book if you were born into a religious cult and question it. Those around you will make you feel lonely and shameful for questioning the belief system assigned to you at birth, but you're not alone.
Profile Image for Global Donnica.
88 reviews10 followers
October 9, 2013
Great eye opener for those who choose to challenge and seek answers to questions...
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