Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Start by marking “People Can't Drive You Crazy if You Don't Give Them the Keys” as Want to Read:
People Can't Drive You Crazy if You Don't Give Them the Keys
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating
Open Preview

People Can't Drive You Crazy if You Don't Give Them the Keys

3.87  ·  Rating details ·  647 Ratings  ·  84 Reviews
You don't have to be controlled by difficult people! Strange as it may seem, other people are not nearly as committed to our happiness as we are. In fact, sometimes it seems like they’re on a mission to make us miserable! There’s always that one person. The one who hijacks our emotions. The one who seems to thrive on drama. If we could just “fix” that person, everything wo ...more
Audiobook
Published October 1st 2012 by Oasis Audio
More Details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30)
Rating details
Sort: Default
|
Filter
Melanie
May 01, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: may
People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them The Keys. First I have got to say, I LOVE this book's title. It caught my eye and is one of the reasons I wanted to read it. I'm so glad that I finally did, as the message in the book spoke to me and I was highlighting so many quotes. One thing I took away is that you can't change other people, but you can change yourself.
Marjorie
Jun 29, 2013 rated it liked it
I think it was a reinforcement of what most of us know we should do .... but good to read and be more prepared in those life situations that do/will come up. Bottom line is, 'We can't control other people .... do your best to emotionally distance yourself and have a mantra ready as a 'go to'. (ie...That is something I am not going to discuss with you.)
Jennifer
Dec 04, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
All of us have someone in our life that makes us want to pull out our hair. They do and say things that can really drive us crazy!

Sometimes we can get away from them, but many times, we can't. Especially if they're in our family.

Dr. Mike Bechtle talks about this in his book, People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them the Keys. The interesting thing is, we have more control over our emotions within the crazy circumstances than we think!

Bechtle never denies the fact that we do have crazy
...more
Katya Vinogradova
This self-help book is supposed to help alleviate the stress in your life that is caused by annoying humans - and I felt so much better and more calm while/after reading this book. So well done, Mike Bechtle, you delivered on what was promised!
Side note: I noticed that some people were not happy with the religious undertone of the book. And while I agree that Bechtle makes plenty of references to the Bible and talks about how religion helps him deal with stress, it doesn't sound preachy at all.
...more
Mel Harris
Apr 02, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Good book on interpersonal relationships. I would say that it os the strongest I’ve read since boundaries (cloud/Townsend)...Works on dealing with the overwhelming people, changing yourself and how you respond...all without sounding “preachy”. Could be a good small group study.
Victor Gentile
Oct 26, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Mike Bechtle in his new book, “People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them the Keys” published by Revell gives us the ability to deal with difficult people.

From the back cover: You don’t have to be controlled by difficult people!

Strange as it may seem, other people are not nearly as committed to our happiness as we are. In fact, sometimes it seems like they’re on a mission to make us miserable! There’s always that one person. The one who hijacks our emotions. The one who seems to thrive
...more
Laura
Oct 26, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Title: PEOPLE CAN’T DRIVE YOU CRAZY IF YOU DON’T GIVE THEM THE KEYS
Author: Mike Bechtle
Publisher: Revell
October 2012
ISBN: 978-0-8007-2111-4
Genre: Nonfiction/self-help/relationships

You don’t have to be controlled by difficult people!

You are the only one truly committed to your happiness. No one else really cares if you’re happy. It’s like they’re on a mission to make you miserable! There’s always that one person—that one who hijacks our emotions. The one who thrives on drama.

But since we can’t f
...more
Susan
Oct 27, 2012 rated it it was amazing

When I was in high school, I remember a teacher asking us to write down a few book genres we enjoyed reading. For one, I wrote down "self-help books." I think back to that every now and then, mainly to smile over the teacher's probable amusement: a 16-year-old who enjoyed reading self-help books! But to this day, I still enjoy them and pick one up occasionally.

"People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them the Keys" is a great example. We all know and interact with people we could charitab
...more
Kellie
Mar 18, 2013 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: gave-up
I can sum up this book in the following sentence: You cannot change anyone but yourself and how you react to others.

I got this by the second disc. I am not sure what more there was because this was repeated several times and I was not hearing anything else. I also quite listening because I became fed up with the author's constant use of the word CRAZY which personally offended me with his excessive use.

Dear Mr. Bechtle; Some people are actually crazy or what we now refer to has mentally ill.

I
...more
Tricia Hutson
Apr 07, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Really enjoyed this

I've enjoyed reading this and digesting it pieces at a time over the last few months. It came at just the right time in my life when my "crazy person" was starting to affect me so completely it was bleeding into other relationships. This book teaches how to let go and take control of the only change you really can expect in those relationships: yourself. It's an in depth explanation with practical uses and drives home the idea that you should, "Never let someone live rent free
...more
Shelley Wiegmann
Great book to help you handle difficult people

It gives you an honest look at ourselves and others. I enjoyed this book also because it speaks to the truth of the matter and helps you give the answers that free you up. We don't have to allow others to control us and we certainly cannot control others. I am learning to respond to my husband's behavior in a better way. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who has crazy people in their lives that especially like to push our buttons.
Jennifer
Apr 28, 2018 rated it it was ok
This book basically just reiterates what we know about other people, you can't change them, so you need to find ways to deal with them. Unfortunately I found the God and bible references over the top for me... God made people different, you can't change what God put on this earth. I enjoy non-fiction books that encourage self-help, but not when they become preachy and religious.
Margaret Lozano
Jun 15, 2018 rated it it was ok
The title is great, the content less so. There's nothing new here, and I didn't find the writing particularly engaging, to put it mildly. It feels like being lectured to by a kindly - yet uninformed - friend of your parents for hours on end. You know the author means well...but it's just a waste of time, and you'll be counting down the pages until its over.
Pam
Dec 04, 2017 rated it really liked it
An interesting read for maintaining relationships and establishing boundaries. Not new information but definitely something we need to remember - we can't change others but we can influence them by our own actions and responses.
Joshua Aiken
May 29, 2017 rated it it was amazing
The book teaches you that in order to deal with difficult challenging people you need to change your own way of thinking. Your own behavior influences the difficult person's behavior. Coping with difficult people is a challenge but this book will teach you how to effectively manage.
Anusha Jalasutram
Jan 29, 2018 rated it did not like it
Quite redundant - he does use a couple of eye-opening analogies but outside of that the premise of his advice is very repetitive and some of it convoluted.
Michelle Glatt
Feb 08, 2017 rated it it was ok
As far as advice goes, there is not much new here, but the style and presentation is enjoyable and made me do some thinking.
Kendra
Sep 18, 2017 rated it really liked it
Common sense stuff, but good reminders on dealing with difficult personalities.
Jessica
Aug 24, 2017 rated it really liked it
I wasn't aware there were going to be so many religious references when I started reading this book, but it still has a lot of valuable concepts. I'm happy I took the time to read it.
Quratulain
Jan 21, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Must-read
Sunflower
Nov 02, 2012 rated it it was amazing
The holidays are around the corner and we all know what that means... Oh yes...Dealing with family members and friends around the table,that leaves us feeling consumed more with indigestion than the turkey did.

Maybe it's the co-worker in the cubicle with you with the strong perfume and that laugh that feels like nails across the blackboard?

Whichever is the case, one thing tends to be true...they are driving you crazy.

In his book,"People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them The Keys", rea
...more
Meagan Myhren-bennett
People Can't Drive You Crazy If
You Don't Give Them the Keys
By Mike Bechtle

I just love the title of this book,which is the reason when I was given the opportunity to review it I jumped at the chance. I mean after all who doesn't have at least one crazy person in their life trying to take you for a long out of the way drive? Mike Bechtle gives you the means to put a break on this drive to crazy.

We all have other people in our life - family, friends, co-workers, neighbors and for some reason or ano
...more
Sheryl M. Baker
Nov 06, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I have been studying challenging behaviors and how to respond to them for the past fifteen years. This book, I must say, is now a part of my top 5 list of books to read on dealing with difficult personalities. I like this book, because it focuses on the reader and gives them helpful and practicul advise on how to deal with people who drive you crazy. The material is easy to read and understand. The examples are humorous and real life examples from the author's life and profession.

If one looking
...more
Lynn Smith
Dec 06, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This was a very helpful book. It is not a long read (around 200 pages) and well written with practical advice and examples. All of us have crazy people in our lives and it is a challenge to deal with them. However, most of us set ourselves up for failure as we have unrealistic expectations, or we just give up and walk away. This book will teach you sound principles on dealing with the crazy people in your life. You'll learn you cannot fix or change anyone else. All you can do is change yourself ...more
Karen
May 26, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: kindle
We all have crazy people in our lives. Whether it is a work, family, church, or neighborhood. What would happen if we could learn how to control the situation so that their craziness dosen't control our future reactions. This book isn't really a self-help book but more of an ah-ha it can't be that simple can it?
We all have control over ourselves and no one else. Giving someone the keys to our feelings and emotions is allowing them to frustrate and harm us.

One thing that really got me thinking i
...more
Grace
A good book that gives you insight on dealing with difficult people.

Some of my favorite quotes were:

The event isn't really the problem; it's our response to the event.

It's those situations that we can't fix are those people we can't change that make us the most uncomfortable.

The problem with our perspective is we always assume were right based on the information we have. No matter what the other person does it's our perspective that determines how we feel and respond.

Read it for yourself it ma
...more
brian d rogers
Sep 14, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I've spent a good part of the last four years working on self-improvement.some books have taken me up inspired me, others have left me flat and more lost than when I started. This book is been extremely satisfying, It started me on new ways to understand challenges in my life, and I received actual solutions. To address those challenges. I'm glad to say I'm on a road to real recovery. My suggestion is, USE this book, mark it up, hi light, mark pages, keep a journal. It's a seed of healing and ca ...more
Carrie
Apr 09, 2016 rated it liked it
This was a decent volume regarding the difficult relationships we tend to find ourselves tangled in. As imperfect humans, sometimes others in our lives create drama and chaos that leave us frustrated. One of the benefits of this book is that the theories represented are strongly rooted in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and also biblical principles. I did, however, find some sections to be vague and repetitive, but it is worth a read.
Christine
Jan 21, 2013 rated it it was ok
The title grabbed me; I dove in enthusiastically & then was met with statements of the obvious: other people think different than you (duh); you are responsible for your actions, others are responsible for theirs (duh again); etc. It goes on for chapters pretty much saying the same thing, never really addressing what to do with the truly crazy (who just may be dangerous). One good takeaway for me: be careful with your "inputs"--what your mind takes in & dwells on.
Carol
Mar 14, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This was very helpful in giving suggestions for dealing with difficult people and gave me insight into how I could appear to be difficult to others. Remember, one out of five people are "crazy", and if it's not anyone else in the room, it just may be you! I enjoyed his common sense advice, and he gave me a lot to think about. I could think of a number of people to pass this on to but they might be offended, so if you want me to pass it on to you, just let me know.
« previous 1 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 next »
There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Be the first to start one »
  • The Well-Lived Laugh: Designing a Life That Keeps You Smiling
  • The Ways of God (Finding Purpose Through Your Pain)
  • Getting to No: How to Break a Stubborn Habit
  • Living Successfully with Screwed-Up People
  • I Have Loved You: Getting to Know the Father's Heart
  • 7 Simple Choices for a Better Tomorrow
  • Spiritual Secrets To Weight Loss: A 50 Day Renewal of the Mind, Body, and Spirit
  • Strip Off Your Fear: Radiate the Confidence Within
  • Holy Habits: A Woman's Guide to Intentional Living
  • Set Free to Live Free: Breaking Through the 7 Lies Women Tell Themselves
  • Stress Busters (Stress Management Techniques) How to use stress to your advantage, beat burnout, and accomplish anything - on your terms
  • When You Can't Find God
  • Impact My Life:  Biblical Mentoring Simplified
  • Good News for Those Trying Harder
  • Sparkle: The Girl's Guide to Living a Deliciously Dazzling, Wildly Effervescent, Kick-Ass Life
  • Live Like You Mean It: The 10 Crucial Questions That Will Help You Clarify Your Purpose / Live Intentionally / Make the Most of the Rest of Your Life
  • Unfriend Yourself
  • Desires of My Heart - Meditation on Psalm 37:4
“Martin Luther supposedly said, “You might not be able to stop the birds from landing on your head, but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair.” 3 likes
“The Power of Influence I’ve realized that I choose not to spend much time with people who are trying to change me. If they take me on as a project to “fix,” I don’t respond well. But when they simply enter my life and accept me unconditionally, I become a different person because of their influence.” 3 likes
More quotes…