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This I Know: Notes On Unraveling The Heart
Part memoir, part creative journal, This I Know chronicles Susannah’s journey through bereavement and healing, taking the reader on a ride into the possibilities of unravelling — and healing — her own life too. It’s a guidebook of sorts, a collection of thoughts and theories, with creative exercises for you to try, and dreamy light-filled Polaroids dotted throughout the text. It’s a cosy blanket for your heart.
234 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2012
36 people are currently reading
1180 people want to read
About the author
Susannah Conway
6 books57 followersSusannah Conway is the author of This I Know: Notes on Unraveling the Heart (Globe Pequot Press). A photographer, writer and teacher, her classes have been enjoyed by thousands of people from over 50 countries around the world. Co-author of Instant Love: How to Make Magic and Memories with Polaroids (Chronicle Books), Susannah helps others reconnect to their true selves, using creativity as the key to open the door. You can read more about her shenanigans on her blog at SusannahConway.com.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 69 reviews
September 20, 2012
This book helped me tremendously as I've grieved the loss of my special dog, Frankie, known as the "walk 'n roll dog" this summer (she was in a doggie wheelchair due to disc disease).
Susannah's book gave me so much hope that I will find a new bliss and direction for my life after such a deep loss. Frankie and I were a team and she was my life and work the past six years, making close to 350 appearances at schools. She was also a therapy dog and we did many visits to a senior assisted facility and hospice.
She was part of my journey and purpose, no doubt, and losing her in June was one of the hardest things I've ever gone through. Your book came along just at the right time. We read it for our Creative Book Salon that writing coach Cynthia Morris leads.
One paragraph in particular really struck me and helped me so much: "Each person experiences grief in their own individual way. And though I have often thought to lose a child would be the most devastating loss of all, there is no hierarchy to grief- only we can know the pain we fell and what we have lost."
There is no right or wrong way to grieve--though so often I think many don't understand that losing a pet can be just as hard, sometimes harder, than losing a human in our lives. But what Susannah shared about the fact that there is no hierarchy to grief is so true. Thank you.
Reading her book has given me hope that through my grieving process I will come to a new place, a new path and the journey will continue in a new way. I look forward to that as it unfolds.
Thank you, Susannah, for writing such and honest and courageous book--you shared your heart and it truly showed--and it truly helped me.
Susannah's book gave me so much hope that I will find a new bliss and direction for my life after such a deep loss. Frankie and I were a team and she was my life and work the past six years, making close to 350 appearances at schools. She was also a therapy dog and we did many visits to a senior assisted facility and hospice.
She was part of my journey and purpose, no doubt, and losing her in June was one of the hardest things I've ever gone through. Your book came along just at the right time. We read it for our Creative Book Salon that writing coach Cynthia Morris leads.
One paragraph in particular really struck me and helped me so much: "Each person experiences grief in their own individual way. And though I have often thought to lose a child would be the most devastating loss of all, there is no hierarchy to grief- only we can know the pain we fell and what we have lost."
There is no right or wrong way to grieve--though so often I think many don't understand that losing a pet can be just as hard, sometimes harder, than losing a human in our lives. But what Susannah shared about the fact that there is no hierarchy to grief is so true. Thank you.
Reading her book has given me hope that through my grieving process I will come to a new place, a new path and the journey will continue in a new way. I look forward to that as it unfolds.
Thank you, Susannah, for writing such and honest and courageous book--you shared your heart and it truly showed--and it truly helped me.
September 28, 2012
To "ravel" is to "entangle or confuse". "This I Know" is a story of un-raveling ... untangling or eliminating (reducing? can we ever truly eliminate?) confusion in the life of the author. After a period consumed by intense grieving, confusion and a near-total loss of self (although the author, I think, makes an excellent case that she was quite "lost" before her loss) caused by the tragic loss of a still-growing and deepening love, Ms. Conway found her way through by "un-raveling". The word simply came to her, and grew into a touch-phrase (touch-word? touch-stone?) for her to understand the process that she was going through, needed to go through still, to heal after her loss.
"This I Know" (TIK) is a journal of how Susannah (can I call her that? reading this story allowed me to become so intimate with her thoughts that using "Ms. Conway" seems severely formal ... and although Susannah seems far too presumptuous, I can't seem to think of her in any other way) came through the processing of her grief, how she learned much about herself and her wants and needs, to find herself. "Finding" yourself seems cliche' ... but that is exactly what Susannah did.
Susannah Conway has unique and wonderful talents. A favorite passage:
"Sometimes I'm a writer who writes with a camera; sometimes I'm a photographer who shoots with words ...When I read I see images; when I take photographs I hear descriptions. This is my creative world, the two disciplines informing and supporting each other, my photographs telling stories, my words filled with images, the visual and the narrative fusing together."
To hold great depth in either of these talents is rare in and of itself. To exist together in one person ... one body, one heart, one soul ... to the amazing degree that they do within Susannah Conway allows her to express creativity beyond simple description. As with nearly all authors I come to love, I would so enjoy spending time ... a day, a week, an hour ... with Susannah. I do not have these talents. I write without her depth, photograph without her eye for composition, detail and innate descriptive message. To listen to her describe how they work together, to learn how someone with that rare and unique combination thinks and feels and displays those thoughts and feelings ... it's difficult to think of a better use of time.
TIK itself was, to me, a challenging read. Not because of the material or the style or even the words, but because of the thoughts and deep self-examination they caused within my own mind. I found myself reading a page or two or five and setting the book aside as I drifted into introspection. The "Reflections" sections at the end of each chapter are intended, I think, to induce that introspective self-examination (and they did so wonderfully) ... but they were, for me, unnecessary. So many times I found myself sitting with the book open on my lap, thoughts far away, relating her themes to my own process of unraveling.
I save my "5" ratings for books that can, most likely will, cause change in the lives of the reader. TIK deserves a 5+. Someday I hope to meet Susannah Conway and thank her for having the courage to share her story with the rest of us.
ADDED SEPT 27, 2012:
My reviews are being reviewed! Valuable feedback received ... "Your review was incomplete. You mention your own process of unraveling and you say that you reserve 5s for books that can cause change in a reader's life. How did this book help you in your process and how did it change your life?" Good questions ...
Simply put, I am a person who values a roadmap. It's not enough for me to know where I'm starting and where I will end ... I like to have a sense of the route, be able to track my progress, see the milestones and the guideposts along the way. And even though I completely understand that every person and every instance and every situation is totally different, being able to see, hear and feel the path another has taken through uncharted waters helps me. In the introduction, SC writes: "Unraveling is not a bad thing. It's not coming undone or losing control. It's letting go in the best possible way, untangling the knots that hold you back, unwrapping the gifts you've hidden for too long, unearthing the potential that's always been there, finally ditching the labels and should-haves, and letting yourself be what you were always meant to be". I've searched for the "who" of my potential and who I've always been meant to be. I've defined a purpose and identified the "things" (not stuff) my life is missing, the "whats", essentially the gifts I have been given and not been grateful enough to develop and display. Now I'm working on "how" to let go, how to untangle, how to unwrap and best display those gifts and transition from a life that does not fit as it should to a life that does.
The way she both works through her grief and let's her grief work through her, understanding that it's a process with starts and stops and fits and reverses and has no set path was valuable to me. It reinforced my own feelings, though my own "grief" is very different than hers. The feelings that she dealt with on the first anniversary were an example of a surprising reaction along the path that I could relate to. The first reflection helped me define my thoughts and feelings towards people I love ... past and present. The honesty of how she recognized that her memories were possibly tinged pink by what or how she wanted to remember. Her discussion of the body and aging and how essential it is to "look after yourself ... to do something kind to yourself every day" helped me remember that I'm a very physical person and ignoring that as I focus on my mental and emotional well-being is leaving out a piece that is exceptionally important.
Honestly I could go on and on with examples. I can also say that I can't find myself yet able to be as totally open as SC is. I'm both in awe of, and jealous of, her ability to do so. I continue to strive towards greater openness, towards a higher degree of being "real" with and in my life. I've long understood that it's not a switch that can just be flipped. It takes time and effort and a rearrangement of a life that has for far too long not been that way. Those that truly know me are patient and kind as I work my way through. And I love them even more for that.
I hope that helps answer the questions. I know my answer is not complete, but if you read it closely enough, I think you can understand why I enjoyed and value TIK so deeply. My life has changed, and is changing ... for the better ... This I Know.
"This I Know" (TIK) is a journal of how Susannah (can I call her that? reading this story allowed me to become so intimate with her thoughts that using "Ms. Conway" seems severely formal ... and although Susannah seems far too presumptuous, I can't seem to think of her in any other way) came through the processing of her grief, how she learned much about herself and her wants and needs, to find herself. "Finding" yourself seems cliche' ... but that is exactly what Susannah did.
Susannah Conway has unique and wonderful talents. A favorite passage:
"Sometimes I'm a writer who writes with a camera; sometimes I'm a photographer who shoots with words ...When I read I see images; when I take photographs I hear descriptions. This is my creative world, the two disciplines informing and supporting each other, my photographs telling stories, my words filled with images, the visual and the narrative fusing together."
To hold great depth in either of these talents is rare in and of itself. To exist together in one person ... one body, one heart, one soul ... to the amazing degree that they do within Susannah Conway allows her to express creativity beyond simple description. As with nearly all authors I come to love, I would so enjoy spending time ... a day, a week, an hour ... with Susannah. I do not have these talents. I write without her depth, photograph without her eye for composition, detail and innate descriptive message. To listen to her describe how they work together, to learn how someone with that rare and unique combination thinks and feels and displays those thoughts and feelings ... it's difficult to think of a better use of time.
TIK itself was, to me, a challenging read. Not because of the material or the style or even the words, but because of the thoughts and deep self-examination they caused within my own mind. I found myself reading a page or two or five and setting the book aside as I drifted into introspection. The "Reflections" sections at the end of each chapter are intended, I think, to induce that introspective self-examination (and they did so wonderfully) ... but they were, for me, unnecessary. So many times I found myself sitting with the book open on my lap, thoughts far away, relating her themes to my own process of unraveling.
I save my "5" ratings for books that can, most likely will, cause change in the lives of the reader. TIK deserves a 5+. Someday I hope to meet Susannah Conway and thank her for having the courage to share her story with the rest of us.
ADDED SEPT 27, 2012:
My reviews are being reviewed! Valuable feedback received ... "Your review was incomplete. You mention your own process of unraveling and you say that you reserve 5s for books that can cause change in a reader's life. How did this book help you in your process and how did it change your life?" Good questions ...
Simply put, I am a person who values a roadmap. It's not enough for me to know where I'm starting and where I will end ... I like to have a sense of the route, be able to track my progress, see the milestones and the guideposts along the way. And even though I completely understand that every person and every instance and every situation is totally different, being able to see, hear and feel the path another has taken through uncharted waters helps me. In the introduction, SC writes: "Unraveling is not a bad thing. It's not coming undone or losing control. It's letting go in the best possible way, untangling the knots that hold you back, unwrapping the gifts you've hidden for too long, unearthing the potential that's always been there, finally ditching the labels and should-haves, and letting yourself be what you were always meant to be". I've searched for the "who" of my potential and who I've always been meant to be. I've defined a purpose and identified the "things" (not stuff) my life is missing, the "whats", essentially the gifts I have been given and not been grateful enough to develop and display. Now I'm working on "how" to let go, how to untangle, how to unwrap and best display those gifts and transition from a life that does not fit as it should to a life that does.
The way she both works through her grief and let's her grief work through her, understanding that it's a process with starts and stops and fits and reverses and has no set path was valuable to me. It reinforced my own feelings, though my own "grief" is very different than hers. The feelings that she dealt with on the first anniversary were an example of a surprising reaction along the path that I could relate to. The first reflection helped me define my thoughts and feelings towards people I love ... past and present. The honesty of how she recognized that her memories were possibly tinged pink by what or how she wanted to remember. Her discussion of the body and aging and how essential it is to "look after yourself ... to do something kind to yourself every day" helped me remember that I'm a very physical person and ignoring that as I focus on my mental and emotional well-being is leaving out a piece that is exceptionally important.
Honestly I could go on and on with examples. I can also say that I can't find myself yet able to be as totally open as SC is. I'm both in awe of, and jealous of, her ability to do so. I continue to strive towards greater openness, towards a higher degree of being "real" with and in my life. I've long understood that it's not a switch that can just be flipped. It takes time and effort and a rearrangement of a life that has for far too long not been that way. Those that truly know me are patient and kind as I work my way through. And I love them even more for that.
I hope that helps answer the questions. I know my answer is not complete, but if you read it closely enough, I think you can understand why I enjoyed and value TIK so deeply. My life has changed, and is changing ... for the better ... This I Know.
June 9, 2012
This is a really lovely and inspiring book about overcoming grief, loss and other obstacles to live a heartfelt and authentic life. The writing is breathtaking in parts and the photos are gorgeous. It's a nice pick-me-up of a book if you're looking for inspiration.
July 24, 2018
Wow, really enjoyed this, great if you have been bereaved but also if you haven't. I didn't do all the exercises rigorously but just reading and thinking about them was good for me
May 19, 2016
Something different happened when I finished reading This I Know: Notes on Unraveling the Heart. Something that has only happened after watching 10 Things I Hate About You. I immediately wanted to start it again.
I want to re-read and savour every single word Susannah Conway has written. I want to read every single blog post she has ever published, so I can continue to lap up her beautiful way with words. She's the blogger I wish I was. The writer I'd love to become.
Susannah's boyfriend, very unexpectedly, died of a heart attack. But this book is more than just a story of dealing with grief and loss. It's about finding yourself, reconnecting with your creative side, learning to appreciate yourself. Dotted throughout with Susannah's beautiful polaroid pictures, this book is a delight for the eyes as well as the soul. I especially loved the 'reflection' exercises at the end of each chapter.
I've never dealt with grief directly, not true grief. Not grief that stops you getting up in the morning. Nor grief that suffocates and interferes in everything that you do. But I've been close to it. Last year, a wonderful friend's boyfriend was killed in a car accident. Unexpected and cruel. And just last week my good friend from korfball lost her dad. A stroke. Mortality slapping me in the face again. Making me realise that my parents aren't young any longer and death doesn't give a shit about age anyway. I don't want to have to lose someone to make me realise that I want more in life. To make me find myself. To make me strive for the things that really matter.
The last chapter particularly spoke to me. Susannah writes of being an 'introverted soul' and how working from home is perfect for her as it brings a sense of freedom into her life. I wanted to share this paragraph with you:
'I've only touched on a few possibilities in the space I have here, but whether you're in between jobs, craving change, going back to work after a period away or just sure that you were meant for something more, the best place to start is within, unraveling the dreams that call to you when you close your eyes.'
Cliché, but it's almost as if she was writing a note directly to me.
I'm already recommending this book to so many people. If I could buy you all a copy I would, because if you're a blogger, I believe this book will touch you in a way no other book will.
Jennifer Loudon summed up my thoughts quite well:
"You hold in your hand one of those books. You will buy multiple copies of it to press into the hands of friends. You will mark it up with notes, and read passages again and again. You will not lend this book out. This book was forged in grief and is lit by love. Feast your creative heart!"
I'm off to purchase my very own copy right now. I will laden it with sticky notes and read it time and time again.
I want to re-read and savour every single word Susannah Conway has written. I want to read every single blog post she has ever published, so I can continue to lap up her beautiful way with words. She's the blogger I wish I was. The writer I'd love to become.
Susannah's boyfriend, very unexpectedly, died of a heart attack. But this book is more than just a story of dealing with grief and loss. It's about finding yourself, reconnecting with your creative side, learning to appreciate yourself. Dotted throughout with Susannah's beautiful polaroid pictures, this book is a delight for the eyes as well as the soul. I especially loved the 'reflection' exercises at the end of each chapter.
I've never dealt with grief directly, not true grief. Not grief that stops you getting up in the morning. Nor grief that suffocates and interferes in everything that you do. But I've been close to it. Last year, a wonderful friend's boyfriend was killed in a car accident. Unexpected and cruel. And just last week my good friend from korfball lost her dad. A stroke. Mortality slapping me in the face again. Making me realise that my parents aren't young any longer and death doesn't give a shit about age anyway. I don't want to have to lose someone to make me realise that I want more in life. To make me find myself. To make me strive for the things that really matter.
The last chapter particularly spoke to me. Susannah writes of being an 'introverted soul' and how working from home is perfect for her as it brings a sense of freedom into her life. I wanted to share this paragraph with you:
'I've only touched on a few possibilities in the space I have here, but whether you're in between jobs, craving change, going back to work after a period away or just sure that you were meant for something more, the best place to start is within, unraveling the dreams that call to you when you close your eyes.'
Cliché, but it's almost as if she was writing a note directly to me.
I'm already recommending this book to so many people. If I could buy you all a copy I would, because if you're a blogger, I believe this book will touch you in a way no other book will.
Jennifer Loudon summed up my thoughts quite well:
"You hold in your hand one of those books. You will buy multiple copies of it to press into the hands of friends. You will mark it up with notes, and read passages again and again. You will not lend this book out. This book was forged in grief and is lit by love. Feast your creative heart!"
I'm off to purchase my very own copy right now. I will laden it with sticky notes and read it time and time again.
May 26, 2012
Disclaimer: I love everything Susannah Conway does, her blog, her ecourses, her photography, and now this book, This I Know: Notes on Unraveling the Heart. She is consistently honest, open-hearted and funny, willing to share her “wobbly bits” along with the brilliant beauty of life.
Any woman who has experienced grief and loss (that is, every woman alive) should read this book. For some of us this is the loss of a loved one, for others the loss of self, or for others still it might be the loss of both. This book is a map of one woman’s personal journey through bereavement and rediscovery of self, but it is also offered as a guidebook for those making their way along the same path, traveling through that same territory of loss. And yet, as Susannah says, this “is not a story about grief, although it informs everything I’ve learned about life. This is a book about unraveling the layers of our lives and exploring what we find in order to better understand ourselves, our relationships, and our path.”
This book embodies, through both word and image, the tender heart of that sadness, not shying away from the reality of it, the truth that life can kick your ass but that we can also lean into joy and be softened by beauty, can and will encounter grace, and know love. We may have tears streaming down our face or feel bad about our thighs, but with our eyes and heart open wide to both the brutality and beauty of life, we can heal, we can live a wholehearted life.
This book might first be about one woman’s individual journey towards wholeness, but in the end, it is an offering to the reader, an invitation to unravel our own hearts. Sometimes, simply knowing that others have walked a similar path is all the medicine and advice you need, but Susannah Conway takes it one step beyond, offering a reflection at the end of each chapter, small creative exercises that invite the reader to explore, to unravel. In this way, it is a book that one could come back to again and again.
In the end, this book is like a long, intimate conversation with the best girlfriend ever, one who has been where you are, can authentically sit in that dark place with you, but who also has a map that shows the way out, an invitation to the rest of your beautiful life.
Any woman who has experienced grief and loss (that is, every woman alive) should read this book. For some of us this is the loss of a loved one, for others the loss of self, or for others still it might be the loss of both. This book is a map of one woman’s personal journey through bereavement and rediscovery of self, but it is also offered as a guidebook for those making their way along the same path, traveling through that same territory of loss. And yet, as Susannah says, this “is not a story about grief, although it informs everything I’ve learned about life. This is a book about unraveling the layers of our lives and exploring what we find in order to better understand ourselves, our relationships, and our path.”
This book embodies, through both word and image, the tender heart of that sadness, not shying away from the reality of it, the truth that life can kick your ass but that we can also lean into joy and be softened by beauty, can and will encounter grace, and know love. We may have tears streaming down our face or feel bad about our thighs, but with our eyes and heart open wide to both the brutality and beauty of life, we can heal, we can live a wholehearted life.
This book might first be about one woman’s individual journey towards wholeness, but in the end, it is an offering to the reader, an invitation to unravel our own hearts. Sometimes, simply knowing that others have walked a similar path is all the medicine and advice you need, but Susannah Conway takes it one step beyond, offering a reflection at the end of each chapter, small creative exercises that invite the reader to explore, to unravel. In this way, it is a book that one could come back to again and again.
In the end, this book is like a long, intimate conversation with the best girlfriend ever, one who has been where you are, can authentically sit in that dark place with you, but who also has a map that shows the way out, an invitation to the rest of your beautiful life.
November 11, 2014
I felt so connected to this author that it was as if I wrote this book myself. I was drawn to this book after running across Susannah's blog and decided to read it for blogging inspiration and what I assumed would be mostly a book on creativity - which it was. But it was so much more than that for me. Although I knew she touched upon grief issues, I did not expect this aspect to resonate with me. It did. I was also happily surprised that she wrote about her introverted nature as I connected to her on so many levels in this way. She gave permission to embrace one's introverted nature and showed, through concrete examples, how to use my introversion to help find my best, most true self. Finally, I loved how the author ended each chapter with a reflection which really turned out to be small creative assignments for the reader. So much wrapped up in this little book of yummy goodness!
June 1, 2012
Quite possibly the most profoundly important book I've read. Susannah spills her heart and soul on those pages and spoke directly to me. I bought copies for my friends, and as I go into health coaching, I'll be buying copies for my clients as well. For anyone who sees the world through a camera lenses and/or written words, it quenches a thirst.
July 18, 2012
While I enjoy this authors blog on occasion- I really did not understand the purpose of the book- it felt disjointed- it was also a very similar experience as her course- no new material really. The writing is basic- yet sincere. With that said- the author has clearly mastered Polaroid photography- a real expert.
Read
September 3, 2012After coping with a great deal of loss myself the last few years, some to death and some not, I found myself dog-earing every few pages. I took photos of the passages I most wanted to recall and am adding them to my journal. I think it takes a great deal of courage to let yourself unravel because we don't always want to revisit what's underneath. I would love to meet Susannah Conway.
August 12, 2012
just beautiful
August 18, 2012
A well written, compelling and beautifully illustrated book about creativity, grief, joy and living an honest, authentic life.
December 24, 2021
This was an impulse buy in a used bookstore, but many of the author's sentences aligned with the grief in my head and heart so I'm actually going to hang onto it after reading it which I rarely do with books. If you are experiencing grief, this book does a bit of the unraveling to help you some fresh air.
May 13, 2013
Some books are so beautiful, I can't help but pick them up and thumb through. "This I Know: Notes On Unraveling The Heart" by Susannah Conway was one of those books: the cover resembled a homemade scrapbook saved for only the most precious photos; the heavy matte pages were filled with random quirky Polaroids, the kind you would tape to the bathroom mirror to keep a special memory fresh in your mind; the size of a girl's secret diary that felt just right clutched against my chest. So I took the book home. And it sat there. From the jacket liner, I knew the book was born out of grief from Ms. Conway having suddenly lost her significant other to a heart attack. I had no current grief issues gnawing at me that made me need to read this book. Still I left the book near my reading chair, picking it up every time I sat down, running my fingers over the cover, flipping through and glancing at the Polaroids until one day I decided I would just start reading. If it was depressing or boring, I would be done with the book, no matter how it's beauty kept drawing me in. Then I wanted to kick myself for waiting so long -- I was hooked even by the introduction when I read:
"Unraveling is not a bad thing. It's not coming undone or losing control. It's letting go in the best possible way, untangling the knots that hold you back, unwrapping the gifts you've hidden for too long, unearthing the potential that's always been there, finally ditching the labels and should-haves, and letting yourself be what you were always meant to be." -- Susannah Conway
I am a sucker for quotes and as soon as I read it I fired this one off in an email to a friend going through an unraveling in her own life. She loved it too. Besides deserving to be front and center on my fridge on a hot pink magnet, this quote sums up the soul of the book. Part memoir, part how-to manual, "This I Know" is about coming through whatever fire you've suffered and rebuilding your life piece by piece with what you love and love to do.
If you are grieving, this book is for you. I also lost a significant other long ago, and Ms. Conway's recounting of the hurt and despair, the hopeful rituals and guilt and baby steps of healing were vividly real. I wish I'd had this book back then to know I wasn't bat crap crazy in all I was going through.
But this book is so much more than a gift for the grieving. "This I Know" is about digging out dreams you forgot you had and making them part of your life; forging past fear and sharing your creativity; becoming friends with your body; making peace between yourself, your face, and aging; and getting comfortable with solitude by creating your own tribe of one.
Being a quote freak, I have to share two more I loved:
"It's never been true, not anywhere at any time, that the value of a soul, of a human spirit, is dependent on a number on a scale." -- Geneen Roth, from "Women, Food and God"
"For me, solitude is not an empty space, but a richly detailed tapestry of my interests, thoughts, and desires. When I am alone I am free to dance inside the textures of my dreams without the pull to be elsewhere, the constant nagging feeling that I should be doing something else." -- Susannah Conway
Ms. Conway found her unraveling from the pit of grief through blogging and taking Polaroids, then turned her passions into online courses to help other women begin the unraveling for themselves. Check out her website, susannahconway.com, to find out more about her classes, photography, and other books.
"This I Know" is beautiful inside and out. Pick it up, you'll see. You'll want one for yourself and one for someone special in your life -- this I know.
"Unraveling is not a bad thing. It's not coming undone or losing control. It's letting go in the best possible way, untangling the knots that hold you back, unwrapping the gifts you've hidden for too long, unearthing the potential that's always been there, finally ditching the labels and should-haves, and letting yourself be what you were always meant to be." -- Susannah Conway
I am a sucker for quotes and as soon as I read it I fired this one off in an email to a friend going through an unraveling in her own life. She loved it too. Besides deserving to be front and center on my fridge on a hot pink magnet, this quote sums up the soul of the book. Part memoir, part how-to manual, "This I Know" is about coming through whatever fire you've suffered and rebuilding your life piece by piece with what you love and love to do.
If you are grieving, this book is for you. I also lost a significant other long ago, and Ms. Conway's recounting of the hurt and despair, the hopeful rituals and guilt and baby steps of healing were vividly real. I wish I'd had this book back then to know I wasn't bat crap crazy in all I was going through.
But this book is so much more than a gift for the grieving. "This I Know" is about digging out dreams you forgot you had and making them part of your life; forging past fear and sharing your creativity; becoming friends with your body; making peace between yourself, your face, and aging; and getting comfortable with solitude by creating your own tribe of one.
Being a quote freak, I have to share two more I loved:
"It's never been true, not anywhere at any time, that the value of a soul, of a human spirit, is dependent on a number on a scale." -- Geneen Roth, from "Women, Food and God"
"For me, solitude is not an empty space, but a richly detailed tapestry of my interests, thoughts, and desires. When I am alone I am free to dance inside the textures of my dreams without the pull to be elsewhere, the constant nagging feeling that I should be doing something else." -- Susannah Conway
Ms. Conway found her unraveling from the pit of grief through blogging and taking Polaroids, then turned her passions into online courses to help other women begin the unraveling for themselves. Check out her website, susannahconway.com, to find out more about her classes, photography, and other books.
"This I Know" is beautiful inside and out. Pick it up, you'll see. You'll want one for yourself and one for someone special in your life -- this I know.
October 1, 2016
Loved it! Descriptive ... working through her grief ... word by word. Each chapter had a reflection that I appreciated.
February 8, 2013
Susannah Conway's 'This I Know: Notes on Unraveling the Heart' is a fantastic book for anyone who is grieving -- due to the death of a loved one. As someone working through grief where no one has died, I found the first half of the book to be less applicable.
Susannah Conway writes with heart and with sincerity, baring herself and the events of her life in a beautiful way. I am somewhat ashamed that I spent the first half of the book skimming every few pages and waiting to get to the actual exercise at the end of the chapter, or waiting for something more relevant to myself. I was expecting more, earlier, on actually unraveling the heart, rather than coping with grief and depression. (Truly valuable resources, I know from experience, but not what I was expecting from this book - at least, no for so much of it.)
That being said, I absolutely loved the second half of the book. The chapter on how women react to their own photographs drew me in and the book kept my attention from that point on. These chapters, later on in the author's life, were the ones I wanted to hear about - finding yourself, a tribe of one, taking chances on a new life. This is the point I find myself at now and I wish there was more material covering these topics. I found myself thinking that it would be wonderful to have lived near Susannah Conway when she started up her night classes - her skill at photography is undeniable and I would love to have more input on her photography exercises than just what is in the book.
I must admit to picking this book up cheaply in ebook format, which detracted from the formatting and quality of the photos, but does mean I was not overly concerned by only loving half the book.
I would recommend this book to anyone struggling to cope with their grief, or wanting to simply know they are not alone. I am also left very interested in the Conway's co-authored book about photography, having seen her skill in the photos through this book.
If this book could be split in two, I would give the first half two stars and the latter half four stars. As it is, I average that out to three out of five stars.
Susannah Conway writes with heart and with sincerity, baring herself and the events of her life in a beautiful way. I am somewhat ashamed that I spent the first half of the book skimming every few pages and waiting to get to the actual exercise at the end of the chapter, or waiting for something more relevant to myself. I was expecting more, earlier, on actually unraveling the heart, rather than coping with grief and depression. (Truly valuable resources, I know from experience, but not what I was expecting from this book - at least, no for so much of it.)
That being said, I absolutely loved the second half of the book. The chapter on how women react to their own photographs drew me in and the book kept my attention from that point on. These chapters, later on in the author's life, were the ones I wanted to hear about - finding yourself, a tribe of one, taking chances on a new life. This is the point I find myself at now and I wish there was more material covering these topics. I found myself thinking that it would be wonderful to have lived near Susannah Conway when she started up her night classes - her skill at photography is undeniable and I would love to have more input on her photography exercises than just what is in the book.
I must admit to picking this book up cheaply in ebook format, which detracted from the formatting and quality of the photos, but does mean I was not overly concerned by only loving half the book.
I would recommend this book to anyone struggling to cope with their grief, or wanting to simply know they are not alone. I am also left very interested in the Conway's co-authored book about photography, having seen her skill in the photos through this book.
If this book could be split in two, I would give the first half two stars and the latter half four stars. As it is, I average that out to three out of five stars.
June 15, 2014
Inside the book + Mini review
I've had This I Know: Notes on Unraveling the Heart since not long after it was released, I think I actually pre-ordered it. I read the first half of This I Know when I first got the book but it made me cry a lot because the first half of the book is about Ms Conway dealing with the loss of her significant other and how it was a shock and how it effected her, and there were some many things that Ms Conway said that hit home for me after the loss of my Dad.
Because of that it took me a long time to be able to pick it up again to finish, partly because I was worried it would make me cry some more and partly because the first half of the book touched me in such a way that I wasn't sure the second half would be as good. Thankfully I had nothing to worry about because the second half was just as good and also didn't make me cry but I found the second half so inspiring.
This I Know is oh so beautifully written, Ms Conway has such a magnificent way with words that at times can be truly magical. I wondered when reading if I found Ms Conway's writing of This I Know to be magical because Ms Conway is writing from her heart and her writing shows the truth that she feels. There are also some truly beautiful pictures that Ms Conway herself has taken to go with the book. Which I think makes it that This I Know that much more special.
I'm not really sure how to categorise This I Know as there's so much more to it than just a book about grief and loss and the journey of moving forward. Ms Conway writes about her work as a photographer and living and moving away from London. About her family and her love for her sister and her sister's little boy, which is yet again another beautiful element to the book. Neither is it really an autobiography or a self help book. But what ever people have categorised This I Know as it's a wonderful and inspiring read. I think everyone should read it, whether they've lost a loved one or not.
I've had This I Know: Notes on Unraveling the Heart since not long after it was released, I think I actually pre-ordered it. I read the first half of This I Know when I first got the book but it made me cry a lot because the first half of the book is about Ms Conway dealing with the loss of her significant other and how it was a shock and how it effected her, and there were some many things that Ms Conway said that hit home for me after the loss of my Dad.
Because of that it took me a long time to be able to pick it up again to finish, partly because I was worried it would make me cry some more and partly because the first half of the book touched me in such a way that I wasn't sure the second half would be as good. Thankfully I had nothing to worry about because the second half was just as good and also didn't make me cry but I found the second half so inspiring.
This I Know is oh so beautifully written, Ms Conway has such a magnificent way with words that at times can be truly magical. I wondered when reading if I found Ms Conway's writing of This I Know to be magical because Ms Conway is writing from her heart and her writing shows the truth that she feels. There are also some truly beautiful pictures that Ms Conway herself has taken to go with the book. Which I think makes it that This I Know that much more special.
I'm not really sure how to categorise This I Know as there's so much more to it than just a book about grief and loss and the journey of moving forward. Ms Conway writes about her work as a photographer and living and moving away from London. About her family and her love for her sister and her sister's little boy, which is yet again another beautiful element to the book. Neither is it really an autobiography or a self help book. But what ever people have categorised This I Know as it's a wonderful and inspiring read. I think everyone should read it, whether they've lost a loved one or not.
September 5, 2012
This book has touched me in so many ways, I don't even have the words. I have laughed out loud, and I have cried tears at my own reflections.
The writing is a gift, and though I have finished reading it, it has gone to an easily accessible bookshelf, because I am no where near finished with the book.
In her own words:
"It's a blessing to find writers whose words speak for us when we are mute, the scribes who record our collective experiences and mine their own lives so we can better understand ours."
Indeed, Susannah, indeed. Thank you for mining your life for us. For me.
Fundamentally this is a book that has changed me, wrung me out and left me a different person than the one who began reading the book. A book that became so hard to read that I put it down for a while. The book that I finished when I most needed to hear the rest of her words.
I am very grateful.
The writing is a gift, and though I have finished reading it, it has gone to an easily accessible bookshelf, because I am no where near finished with the book.
In her own words:
"It's a blessing to find writers whose words speak for us when we are mute, the scribes who record our collective experiences and mine their own lives so we can better understand ours."
Indeed, Susannah, indeed. Thank you for mining your life for us. For me.
Fundamentally this is a book that has changed me, wrung me out and left me a different person than the one who began reading the book. A book that became so hard to read that I put it down for a while. The book that I finished when I most needed to hear the rest of her words.
I am very grateful.
August 27, 2012
I want to read this again and again!! Susannah shows us how she lets herself enter a cocoon to find herself and she comes out with a beautiful butterfly of a story! She shows us her pain on the page. I found myself loving her more and more and wanting that for myself. If you face the pain of your losses, you will find yourself and be able to love yourself like you deserve. I was so inspired by her writing, that today when I didn't want to take my walk, I borrowed her idea of taking a walk with my camera to take pictures!! Wow! What an amazingly different experience it is to take pictures as I walk. She uses her interests of photography and writing to help herself heal from a death of her beloved. I highly recommend this book!!! It is worth reading more than once for sure!!
May 19, 2012
First of all: I'm a big fan of Susannah's photography, so I was very curious about the story behind her as an artist. This book is a milkshake of her tender words and Polaroids. I had no idea what she has been through, so I've met with her strong side for the first time by reading this book. It's about losing love, grief, depression - slowly unraveling every layer, going far back in the past so everything could be healed. This book also contains some self-love exercises and writing prompts, so you can reflect on your own life too. What really made me smile was her poem 'The real me', which I believe is the most beautiful piece of the whole book.
December 19, 2013
I admire Susannah's honesty and willingness to search deep in herself for answers after going through such a tragic loss. However I expected the book to be a little more about how we, the readers, can engage with the world, notice things, appreciate life, take photos, open our senses, etc - ESPECIALLY since in the beginning of the book she states that "this is not a book about grieving or loss" and then goes on to spend about half the book talking about exactly those subjects.
I love her contributions to The Simple Things magazine and was hoping to find more of that here, but this book wasn't nearly as inspiring.
I love her contributions to The Simple Things magazine and was hoping to find more of that here, but this book wasn't nearly as inspiring.
August 29, 2013
Just beautiful -- this expression and exploration of grief and the process of healing, or 'unravelling' is poetic and honest, and the Polaroids sweet and stunning by turns. It's written primarily for the American market but Susannah's 'Englishness' shines through as does her fluent writing style, her incredible insight and her artistry. There are so many truths in this book, whole paragraphs I wanted to read aloud to myself or transcribe, notably words about the security of being alone, the comfort of one's own company... Aaaargh. Loved it. This is a book I shall keep close to my side and to my heart for years to come.
March 7, 2014
This is one of those books that you want to sit and take time with but I just couldn't put it down. Susannah writes so aptly about love and loss and the grief that accompanies losing someone we love. Her description of drowning from grief were as though she'd reached down inside of me and found those words there. Susannah has such a beautiful way of writing that explores the stages of grief, the journey it takes you on and the growth that occurs along the way. A positive inspiring book that I highly recommend to anyone who has experienced loss of any kind. This will be one I will re-read for sure.
April 26, 2015
This book is just beautiful. It's honest and brave and hopeful even as it talks about opening into grief. I have loved everything of Susannah's that I've read and this one ended in such away that I hope there will be more. I would keep reading right where the story left off. I am always grateful for narratives about people who have overcome challenges and found ways to break open into a life that is more than it was before. It makes me optimistic to read these and imagine life always has more to offer than you think, as long as you really show up. I look forward to more and I'm sure this is one that will be read again soon.
July 5, 2012
My favorite parts of this story were Susannah telling her story. Those are the parts I really wanted to read.
Each chapter ended with an idea of a way to live a more fulfilling, present life. Although I liked some of those ideas, I found myself sometimes annoyed with the suggestions about how to improve my life. I would have rather read Conway's story and generalized how it could apply to my situation.
I completely loved the color Polaroids, other photos, and handwritten words that were included throughout the book.
Each chapter ended with an idea of a way to live a more fulfilling, present life. Although I liked some of those ideas, I found myself sometimes annoyed with the suggestions about how to improve my life. I would have rather read Conway's story and generalized how it could apply to my situation.
I completely loved the color Polaroids, other photos, and handwritten words that were included throughout the book.
July 15, 2012
I am only on page 25 but this book has opened the floodgates. The deep grief and sorrow that I tried to shrink-wrap and stuff away for so many years in so many unhealthy ways has begun to engulf me. Grief denied seems to breed on a logarithmic scale. Susannah is absolutely right, grief does not leave us and we cannot leave it. Rather, we must sit with it and live thru it, accepting its transformative nature. Acceptance. I have to wrap my heart around acceptance in order to let go. How daunting this seems to me, right now, in this moment.
Review pending.
Review pending.
October 18, 2012
i'm surprised. for some reason i expected sort of a written unraveling course, but no.
the book is quite autobiographic, starting with the loss of the beloved boyfriend in 2005, and it is very much about grief and how she copes with it, day by day, year by year.
for some reason i expected a thin paperback but it is a stable hardcover and it even seems to have more than 234 pages.
very present: susannah's voice, unique, wise, charming and above all: inspiring.
later more.
the book is quite autobiographic, starting with the loss of the beloved boyfriend in 2005, and it is very much about grief and how she copes with it, day by day, year by year.
for some reason i expected a thin paperback but it is a stable hardcover and it even seems to have more than 234 pages.
very present: susannah's voice, unique, wise, charming and above all: inspiring.
later more.
June 20, 2012
I loved this book. Susannah's style of writing is so beautiful and natural. When I read her I can feel the cool salty air and imagine I am a fantastic photographer, bringing out the personality of the person in the picture. She is so honest with herself and with us it is endearing and inspiring. The book was well written, the photographs dreamy and emotional, and the content thoughtful. I loved reading this book and can think of a few people to recommend it to.
July 5, 2021
I love pretty much everything Susannah Conway does. Her blogs posts are insightful, candid and above all-real. This book is no exception. An honest, and open look into the process of grieving coupled with beautiful photography make this not only a must-read but a keepsake you will cherish and re-read.
January 15, 2013
I cannot believe that none of my absolutely beautiful and amazing friends from the interweb have not yet read this -- you're all on here and you all know who you are!
If you are a fan of internet friends, photography, writing, blogging and self reflection, please read this now. Please. I am in love with this author.
If you are a fan of internet friends, photography, writing, blogging and self reflection, please read this now. Please. I am in love with this author.
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