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Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds
Third Culture Kids speaks to the challenges and rewards of a multicultural childhood; the joy of discovery and heartbreaking loss, its effect on maturing and personal identity, and the difficulty in transitioning home.
360 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1999
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 323 reviews
June 4, 2017
This is the kind of self help book I would normally despise, with simplistic language and basic content.
Why five stars then?
Because it is MY self help book. I read it as part of pedagogical training for international school children in transition, but after a few lines, I started nodding compulsively. I recognised every single issue and question raised in the book. Every single one. It was a book explaining me.
There are certain patterns that third culture kids develop as a reaction to their early exposure to a variety of different languages, school systems, traditions and social codes. They learn to navigate a "home world" and a distinctly different "school world", with some embarrassments and cultural clashes being unavoidable. They learn to handle repeated loss, saying good bye to neighbours, classmates and sports club friends just when they start feeling like "one of them". They learn to make friends quickly, as they know they don't have enough time to wait for relationships to develop naturally. And they learn to adapt to certain behaviours in record time. They know how to blend out stress symptoms and how to play cool on the first day in a new school, how to scan other kids for dress code clues and specific group dynamics. They learn to change hobbies and accents to fit in. They learn to be alone in phases of transition.
What they learn out of necessity eventually turns into something they need, expect, want for themselves.
Moving becomes a state of mind. When I grew up, my life circled around the question: "Where next?"
I get restless when I stay for an extended time in one place. If I can't physically move, I make sure to change within the community where I live. Nothing disturbs me as much as unchanging, stagnant situations. Always looking for new impressions, I follow the pattern of my childhood. At the same time, I feel sadness at having left so much behind, having lost so many contacts, having lost a sense of being rooted in a nationality, a language, a cultural identity.
This book explains that. It explores the core of the chameleon that the third culture kid becomes. On the last pages, it took something away from me as well. When I moved back to Sweden after decades abroad, I developed a passionate rage against the Swedish mentality I struggled to identify with. I thought it "objectively" had to do with Sweden being rotten and me being able to see it clearly because I knew there were "better" places, until I read this book and had to admit I had become an internal immigrant, expecting to fit in where I was a stranger, just because I happened to speak the language and hold the passport of the country.
Nowadays I refer to Sweden as my passport country, and Europe as my home, and I am much less angry, knowing what triggers my frustration: a feeling of belonging - but only partially.
Recommended to globetrotting teachers as a good introduction into international childhood experience, and to grown-up TCKs. They are not misfits after all, just trained with different codes.
Why five stars then?
Because it is MY self help book. I read it as part of pedagogical training for international school children in transition, but after a few lines, I started nodding compulsively. I recognised every single issue and question raised in the book. Every single one. It was a book explaining me.
There are certain patterns that third culture kids develop as a reaction to their early exposure to a variety of different languages, school systems, traditions and social codes. They learn to navigate a "home world" and a distinctly different "school world", with some embarrassments and cultural clashes being unavoidable. They learn to handle repeated loss, saying good bye to neighbours, classmates and sports club friends just when they start feeling like "one of them". They learn to make friends quickly, as they know they don't have enough time to wait for relationships to develop naturally. And they learn to adapt to certain behaviours in record time. They know how to blend out stress symptoms and how to play cool on the first day in a new school, how to scan other kids for dress code clues and specific group dynamics. They learn to change hobbies and accents to fit in. They learn to be alone in phases of transition.
What they learn out of necessity eventually turns into something they need, expect, want for themselves.
Moving becomes a state of mind. When I grew up, my life circled around the question: "Where next?"
I get restless when I stay for an extended time in one place. If I can't physically move, I make sure to change within the community where I live. Nothing disturbs me as much as unchanging, stagnant situations. Always looking for new impressions, I follow the pattern of my childhood. At the same time, I feel sadness at having left so much behind, having lost so many contacts, having lost a sense of being rooted in a nationality, a language, a cultural identity.
This book explains that. It explores the core of the chameleon that the third culture kid becomes. On the last pages, it took something away from me as well. When I moved back to Sweden after decades abroad, I developed a passionate rage against the Swedish mentality I struggled to identify with. I thought it "objectively" had to do with Sweden being rotten and me being able to see it clearly because I knew there were "better" places, until I read this book and had to admit I had become an internal immigrant, expecting to fit in where I was a stranger, just because I happened to speak the language and hold the passport of the country.
Nowadays I refer to Sweden as my passport country, and Europe as my home, and I am much less angry, knowing what triggers my frustration: a feeling of belonging - but only partially.
Recommended to globetrotting teachers as a good introduction into international childhood experience, and to grown-up TCKs. They are not misfits after all, just trained with different codes.
February 11, 2021
Fellow ATCKs, where are you?
With detailed and straightforward prose, this book describes third culture kids (TCK) and cross culture kids (CCK), especially focusing on the adulthood of such kids. TCK refers to children who spend part of their childhoods in a different country. CCK is an umbrella term that includes both TCKs and kids who grow up with different cultures (biracial, adopted, refugees, etc).
Using many real life stories, it explains various traits of ATCKs. Such traits include being "cultural chameleons", a flexible and complicated definition of home, difficulty saying goodbye, interest in different cultures, cultural adaptivity, and arrogance. It does a great job at portraying the advantages and disadvantages of growing up in different cultures.
I didn't know there's a word for this, that this is a thing. I've always felt like my life story isn't that cool, comparatively. My parents weren't diplomats or missionaries, I didn't grow up in 9 different countries either. I was just a kid with two homes and yet, I felt called out while reading this. It's easy to cling to terms and expect them to describe all of you but truly, there were certain moments here where parts of my life clicked together. It's very cool to understand that this is a community, a group of people with a shared experience.
This detailed look was very interesting. However, this book is a little too long and repetitive. It felt like it could have been edited more. I also felt like some parts were less relevant to me, like the part on how to raise TCKs. I'm pretty sure reading the Wikipedia article would provide much of the information presented in this book.
That said, seeing all of the personal stories was a highlight. It's very neat to imagine that this identity could be shared by people with so much diversity between them. Merely the experience of living in a different country than your home country as a child can connect between us. There are moments that I definitely recognized. For example, when I visited the US last time, I was struck by how it did not feel like I remembered it. In many ways, I've stopped seeing myself as an American. I have the citizenship and maybe the accent but my identity shifted. At the same time, there are many many moments where I feel I'm not quite Israeli, when my foreign childhood becomes painfully clear (ugh, stop talking about childhood tv shows, Israelis).
To conclude, if you also grew up in between cultures, this is a very neat book. I'm so curious to learn more about the experience of others who grew up this way. This book is a great way to understand more of this identity, even if I feel like my life story isn't that cool.
What I'm Taking With Me
- Instead of studying, I just learned about the term "existential migration" and I'm excited, who needs economic theory, I wanna know why some people feel attracted to being a foreigner
- I realized that I don't see myself as an immigrant but I do see myself as someone who experienced immigration twice.
- My parents didn't do anything that was advised but we grew up fine, I think?
-----------------------
Whoaaa, there's a word for it! Thinking about myself as a TCK makes me feel like 100% cooler. Review to come, if I ever survive my two very stressful exams this week.
With detailed and straightforward prose, this book describes third culture kids (TCK) and cross culture kids (CCK), especially focusing on the adulthood of such kids. TCK refers to children who spend part of their childhoods in a different country. CCK is an umbrella term that includes both TCKs and kids who grow up with different cultures (biracial, adopted, refugees, etc).
Using many real life stories, it explains various traits of ATCKs. Such traits include being "cultural chameleons", a flexible and complicated definition of home, difficulty saying goodbye, interest in different cultures, cultural adaptivity, and arrogance. It does a great job at portraying the advantages and disadvantages of growing up in different cultures.
I didn't know there's a word for this, that this is a thing. I've always felt like my life story isn't that cool, comparatively. My parents weren't diplomats or missionaries, I didn't grow up in 9 different countries either. I was just a kid with two homes and yet, I felt called out while reading this. It's easy to cling to terms and expect them to describe all of you but truly, there were certain moments here where parts of my life clicked together. It's very cool to understand that this is a community, a group of people with a shared experience.
This detailed look was very interesting. However, this book is a little too long and repetitive. It felt like it could have been edited more. I also felt like some parts were less relevant to me, like the part on how to raise TCKs. I'm pretty sure reading the Wikipedia article would provide much of the information presented in this book.
That said, seeing all of the personal stories was a highlight. It's very neat to imagine that this identity could be shared by people with so much diversity between them. Merely the experience of living in a different country than your home country as a child can connect between us. There are moments that I definitely recognized. For example, when I visited the US last time, I was struck by how it did not feel like I remembered it. In many ways, I've stopped seeing myself as an American. I have the citizenship and maybe the accent but my identity shifted. At the same time, there are many many moments where I feel I'm not quite Israeli, when my foreign childhood becomes painfully clear (ugh, stop talking about childhood tv shows, Israelis).
To conclude, if you also grew up in between cultures, this is a very neat book. I'm so curious to learn more about the experience of others who grew up this way. This book is a great way to understand more of this identity, even if I feel like my life story isn't that cool.
What I'm Taking With Me
- Instead of studying, I just learned about the term "existential migration" and I'm excited, who needs economic theory, I wanna know why some people feel attracted to being a foreigner
- I realized that I don't see myself as an immigrant but I do see myself as someone who experienced immigration twice.
- My parents didn't do anything that was advised but we grew up fine, I think?
-----------------------
Whoaaa, there's a word for it! Thinking about myself as a TCK makes me feel like 100% cooler. Review to come, if I ever survive my two very stressful exams this week.
July 15, 2011
Wow. I finally get myself. A good read, although a bit repetitive and oddly organized at times. Still, a must read for anyone who has dragged their kids halfway around the world (or across the country) to live in a foreign culture or who has been dragged at some point.
March 29, 2012
Don't fit into your little white upper class suburb that everyone thinks is totally happening? Identify with a culture that is not your own? Need to get out of town every week? Keep wondering where you will go next? Not making friends because one day you might move on?
If you have lived overseas and immersed yourself in a culture as a child, chances are you are still carrying baggage from those adventures. Sit down, rest, read and you will discover yourself in these pages.
If you have lived overseas and immersed yourself in a culture as a child, chances are you are still carrying baggage from those adventures. Sit down, rest, read and you will discover yourself in these pages.
July 6, 2019
This book read me like a book.
Would highly recommend if you are a TCK or CCK.
Would still recommend if you aren’t one.
Would highly recommend if you are a TCK or CCK.
Would still recommend if you aren’t one.
November 11, 2016
Poetry this ain't. It's written in the style of self-help literature and it goes on and on.
But I had one "aha" moment after the other as I was reading it.
It describes precisely how I felt as a five-year-old with inadequate English at the American Community School in Athens: because I was uncomfortable with my language skills I ended up befriending the other marginalized kids. When my mom volunteered to be a "tour guide for a day" the only two suspended kids in the whole class were in my group of five friends. I was OK academically, indeed the school pushed me up a grade, but my parents did precisely what this book says they should do: they pulled me out so I could get a fresh start somewhere else.
And it anticipates my dismay when my Greek-dad / Japanese-mom son answered "England" when I asked him if he was supporting Greece or Japan at the recent World Cup (and admonishes me about as much as my wife did for having shown my displeasure)
And it nails how bad it sounded to everybody when my partly French-raised Hungarian/American college roommate deplored the provincial attitudes of his peers from New Jersey.
That said, it's mainly a book about the sons and daughters of American missionaries, diplomats and army personnel who were stationed outside America. Them it covers comprehensively. Everybody else is in there just to make the book more complete.
A shorter and less ambitious book would be much easier to recommend.
But I had one "aha" moment after the other as I was reading it.
It describes precisely how I felt as a five-year-old with inadequate English at the American Community School in Athens: because I was uncomfortable with my language skills I ended up befriending the other marginalized kids. When my mom volunteered to be a "tour guide for a day" the only two suspended kids in the whole class were in my group of five friends. I was OK academically, indeed the school pushed me up a grade, but my parents did precisely what this book says they should do: they pulled me out so I could get a fresh start somewhere else.
And it anticipates my dismay when my Greek-dad / Japanese-mom son answered "England" when I asked him if he was supporting Greece or Japan at the recent World Cup (and admonishes me about as much as my wife did for having shown my displeasure)
And it nails how bad it sounded to everybody when my partly French-raised Hungarian/American college roommate deplored the provincial attitudes of his peers from New Jersey.
That said, it's mainly a book about the sons and daughters of American missionaries, diplomats and army personnel who were stationed outside America. Them it covers comprehensively. Everybody else is in there just to make the book more complete.
A shorter and less ambitious book would be much easier to recommend.
March 10, 2023
Whew! Recommended as a must-read to me by an ATCK, this one took a bit to wade through, but it was well worth the time.
As a parent of three precious children that are soon to become third cultures kids, I dove into this book desiring to (1) equip myself to the best of my abilities in knowledge and understanding of what I’m about to put my children though and (2) know how I can help them successfully navigate the challenges and blessings that come from living cross-culturally.
Parts I and II explain in great depth and detail what third culture kids are, how they are created, benefits, challenges, and the relational, emotional, and developmental impacts of living cross-culturally.
I found parts III and IV very helpful as a parent, especially the chapters on bridging transitions and entry/re-entry. Chapter 13 explains how building a RAFT as a family can greatly help the transition experience, and is something I plan to refer back to and implement.
I would recommend this book to anyone!
As a parent of three precious children that are soon to become third cultures kids, I dove into this book desiring to (1) equip myself to the best of my abilities in knowledge and understanding of what I’m about to put my children though and (2) know how I can help them successfully navigate the challenges and blessings that come from living cross-culturally.
Parts I and II explain in great depth and detail what third culture kids are, how they are created, benefits, challenges, and the relational, emotional, and developmental impacts of living cross-culturally.
I found parts III and IV very helpful as a parent, especially the chapters on bridging transitions and entry/re-entry. Chapter 13 explains how building a RAFT as a family can greatly help the transition experience, and is something I plan to refer back to and implement.
I would recommend this book to anyone!
March 12, 2009
Gives a good overview of what a TCK is, traits that define them/challenges they face and how they can be handled/overcome. It's not just for TCK's themselves, but parents of such people, those who want to know about TCK's and sponsoring companies.
I started this book several times, and read snippets. One time I started it for a paper, I ended up crying because I could relate to a lot of it, and it made me feel lonely. This time I got through it, I still ended up crying during several parts of it, but I'm a bit more heartened by it.
I started this book several times, and read snippets. One time I started it for a paper, I ended up crying because I could relate to a lot of it, and it made me feel lonely. This time I got through it, I still ended up crying during several parts of it, but I'm a bit more heartened by it.
March 16, 2024
{ 5 Stars ✨} ~ { Nonfiction, Sociology/Psychology, Cultural 📚}
Y’all know what time it is! It’s time for a (🥁):
『•• 🎉 Mini Review 🎉 ••』
For us TCKs 😉
And for us CCKs 😊
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
I don’t have too much to say other than that anyone who’s a TCK or a CCK NEEDS to read this book! Regardless of whether you’re someone who’s currently travelling/living somewhere new as part of an assignment, or someone who had already done this several years in the past, this book is so important in conceptualizing, processing, and feeling all the experiences you have most likely gone through 😄
I will also admit that this book might be… a tad long… 👀(this might have taken me around 3 years of on-and-off reading to eventually finish. PLEASE DON'T HATE ME, AUTHORS 😭). I definitely think this book could and should be revised again at some point in the near future, although I still believe it was completely worth my time, and made me feel a little less alone 😊
For all the TCKs/CCKs on Goodreads, let me know if y’all exist! I think I still need a little confirmation to know y’all are out there 😅
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
Book Vibes ~~~> Song Vibes
↺ ᴿᴱᴾᴱᴬᵀ ‖ ᴾᴬᵁˢᴱ ≫ ᴺᴱˣᵀ ˢᴼᴺᴳ
1:14 ───ㅇ───── 3:55
Y’all know what time it is! It’s time for a (🥁):
『•• 🎉 Mini Review 🎉 ••』
For us TCKs 😉
╰┈➤ ❝ A traditional third culture kid (TCK) is a person who spends a significant part of his or her first eighteen years of life accompanying parent(s) into a country or countries that are different from at least one parent’s passport country(ies) due to a parent’s choice of work or advanced training ❞
And for us CCKs 😊
╰┈➤ ❝ A cross-cultural kid (CCK) is a person who is living/has lived in—or meaningfully interacted with—two or more cultural environments for a significant period of time during the first eighteen years of life ❞
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
I don’t have too much to say other than that anyone who’s a TCK or a CCK NEEDS to read this book! Regardless of whether you’re someone who’s currently travelling/living somewhere new as part of an assignment, or someone who had already done this several years in the past, this book is so important in conceptualizing, processing, and feeling all the experiences you have most likely gone through 😄
I will also admit that this book might be… a tad long… 👀
For all the TCKs/CCKs on Goodreads, let me know if y’all exist! I think I still need a little confirmation to know y’all are out there 😅
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
Book Vibes ~~~> Song Vibes
➼ “No Roots” by Alice Merton
➼ “A Different Kind of Human” by Aurora
➼ “kaleidoscope” by mxmtoon
➼ “Kids” by MGMT
↺ ᴿᴱᴾᴱᴬᵀ ‖ ᴾᴬᵁˢᴱ ≫ ᴺᴱˣᵀ ˢᴼᴺᴳ
1:14 ───ㅇ───── 3:55
November 27, 2014
A startling book that was a complete eye-opener, helping me realise that I’m an adult third culture kid (ATCK), through and through. If you’ve ever struggled to answer the question ‘Where is Home?’ or felt internally exhausted at the size of your answer: ‘Umm, well, I’m an American citizen but I grew up in Uganda and studied in Singapore, but now I work in England...’ etc. then this book is for you. It explains how TCKs deal (or haven’t dealt) with unresolved grief from hidden losses that they’ve had to go through all of their lives from early on and discusses the unique strengths and gifts that they bring to the world because of their early inter-mingling with host countries other than the ones their parents were born to. Learn why restlessness and its corollary (the need to be settled) are hard-wired into TCKs. This is a must-read book for anyone who spent even a couple of years of their developmental stages (ages 4 to 14) abroad. Definitely a must-read for any parents who want to understand what their children are going through as TCKs and for therapists to learn about the hidden losses that are unique to TCKs. A part of me wishes I had read this book ten years ago - I certainly had never even heard of TCKs then. But, then I might not have been as understanding of some of the ideas presented in this book.
Read
August 6, 2011If you need a comfy sofa, 15 minutes, a stiff drink and an indulgent listener to give justice to the question "Where are you from?", then this is the book for you! Also for people raising cross-cultural children. Highly recommended!
February 9, 2018
I wish I could read this book to my 15-year-old self. Wow those were some dark times, and with this book everything fell into place. A cathartic read almost.
May 29, 2018
I feel SO VALIDATED. It was so nice to read a book that spoke to almost exactly my experience, growing up as a third culture kid. There was a lot about myself and my personality that I could probably ascribe to the TCK-ness of my upbringing (for good and for ill), but it was incredibly helpful to read and understand how the experience of living abroad, especially for an extended period of time, can shape and affect you. I especially loved the sections talking about grief, about ritual, and about certain things that have been shown to make/break the third-culture experience.
January 31, 2017
My husband and I have decided that we really need to make a practice of reading this book at the start of each year (or maybe every other year). We had a lot of great conversations together from reading it. I have been very humbled and have stood corrected continually as the authors have thoroughly unpacked the complexities of TCKs in each chapter.
I took a lot of notes. This book is full of SO MANY practical tips for parents with regard to things like handling unresolved grief, surviving transition, building strong parent-child relationships, choosing and using mentors, evaluating educational needs, etc.
Something that stood out to me this time (I read the older edition 6 years ago) was that challenges that our TCKs face aren't necessarily a liability but can actually spur our children on to greater things. I should not view the challenges that my five TCKs have and will inevitably face as discouraging realities, but as circumstances that God has put in their lives that may force them to grow in ways that they otherwise would not- and that hopefully may make them more fulfilled and useful in the world as adults.
I took a lot of notes. This book is full of SO MANY practical tips for parents with regard to things like handling unresolved grief, surviving transition, building strong parent-child relationships, choosing and using mentors, evaluating educational needs, etc.
Something that stood out to me this time (I read the older edition 6 years ago) was that challenges that our TCKs face aren't necessarily a liability but can actually spur our children on to greater things. I should not view the challenges that my five TCKs have and will inevitably face as discouraging realities, but as circumstances that God has put in their lives that may force them to grow in ways that they otherwise would not- and that hopefully may make them more fulfilled and useful in the world as adults.
June 2, 2020
Before reading this book I believed that being a third culture kid handicapped me somehow. But after reading that there are thousands of people like me and they have gone through similar experiences, it has taught me that this experience was normal, there are many positives that can be taken from the experience and that I have a story to offer as a result. This has been an empowering and comforting read.
November 25, 2022
This book felt very validating as a third culture kid, it put words to my thoughts and feelings better than I can. I think it is mostly beneficial in actually giving the TCK reader a feeling of belonging to a community they crave. I will say the book could elaborate more on this chapters on how ATCKs should now deal with the effects of their upbringing. Overall, I recommend to anyone who is a TCK or ATCK.
May 21, 2023
A totally new topic for me, different written style of book from what I normally read too, but broadly interesting and insightful. As this new edition also includes the notion of CCKs, it’s scope and applicability is expanded (though the focus is still on TCKs.) If you’ve ever had some kind of cross-cultural experience or interaction, could be something to take a look at!
December 29, 2024
Strangely comforting and intense. Pollock put words on paper that I’ve not been able to verbalize.
Reading it was like looking in the mirror with a therapist. Uncanny how Pollock understood all my whirling emotions 😯; relieving that a positive way was offered to think through the whirlwind. ❤️
Overall I loved it, even if it read like a textbook. Informative and helpful to my journey.
(DNF. The structure is unclear, and there’s too much repetition. Could be useful as a handbook.)
Reading it was like looking in the mirror with a therapist. Uncanny how Pollock understood all my whirling emotions 😯; relieving that a positive way was offered to think through the whirlwind. ❤️
Overall I loved it, even if it read like a textbook. Informative and helpful to my journey.
(DNF. The structure is unclear, and there’s too much repetition. Could be useful as a handbook.)
April 11, 2009
I was referred to this book by my friend's master's thesis, and was duly impressed. This is an interesting topic to me as many friends of mine have grown up overseas or are in the process of beginning careers working overseas with government, NGOs, or missions organizations.
I think this book is a great resource for anyone involved in any way with people raising families within multiple cultures. I'm interested to see if there is any research on the similarities and differences between growing up as a Third Culture Kid and growing up in a multiracial/multilingual/multiethnic family.
I think this book is a great resource for anyone involved in any way with people raising families within multiple cultures. I'm interested to see if there is any research on the similarities and differences between growing up as a Third Culture Kid and growing up in a multiracial/multilingual/multiethnic family.
April 18, 2011
In short I loved this book because it showed me what I was feeling and why. I have been feeling lost for a long time since returning back to my home country and I didn't know why. A friend recommended this book and after reading it I found out what and why I was feeling the way I was.
It also helped me ease the transition of returning home and integrating into a mono cultural society.
It also helped me ease the transition of returning home and integrating into a mono cultural society.
January 25, 2015
Such an interesting subject for all us expats who either spent our childhood and/or youth in different countries or/and are now raising children in a country that isn't "ours".
Unfortunately the writing is quite dull and awfully repetitive so I couldn't bring myself to finish the book but we had a very lively, fun discussion at book club (all of us TCA or raising TCK) anyway.
Unfortunately the writing is quite dull and awfully repetitive so I couldn't bring myself to finish the book but we had a very lively, fun discussion at book club (all of us TCA or raising TCK) anyway.
March 18, 2019
Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds is one of the best resources for TCK's I've ever found...and most definitely the best book. It's resourceful and practically therapeutic, a must-read for anyone who knows or who is a TCK. I'd definitely recommend this for any TCK's who are leaving their host countries to further understand their experiences.
April 26, 2013
Great book, it really helped me understand the mind set of my own kids.
March 30, 2023
therapy is expensive, stealing this book from your mums bookshelf and crying when it explains why you have abandonment issues is free
March 11, 2022
This book was on the shelf at the counseling office, and it began the journey of healing after many pains of being in-between cultures. It also gave me encouraging perspectives and started growing a greater empathy within me for those who are bicultural by necessity.
July 19, 2022
Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds is a book about Third Culture Kids (TCKs), children whose parents' jobs led them to live outside their passport country for an extended period of time. The book starts with a general description of this particular demographic as well as discussing groups that have significant overlap in terms of experience (i.e., refugee children, cross-cultural kids, and children of immigrants). They also have special designations for Adult Third Culture Kids (ATCKs). The book discusses benefits and challenges associated with this type of upbringing, as well as suggestions for both parents and sponsoring organizations to care for these children and adults.
I absolutely love this book. I now realize that I probably qualify as an ATCK in many ways based on the mobility of my childhood, and many of the experiences discussed in the book feel very familiar. Idealization of the parent's career - check. Sophistication in some areas and extreme naivety in others - check. Being able to blend in to many social settings but rarely feeling completely at home anywhere - check. Extreme wanderlust - check. The most comforting aspect of reading this book is the sense of normalcy that it brings to my upbringing. I'm certainly not the only child that grew up all over the place, and I feel better equipped to describe my experiences and how they have colored the way I treat people and my worldview.
I absolutely love this book. I now realize that I probably qualify as an ATCK in many ways based on the mobility of my childhood, and many of the experiences discussed in the book feel very familiar. Idealization of the parent's career - check. Sophistication in some areas and extreme naivety in others - check. Being able to blend in to many social settings but rarely feeling completely at home anywhere - check. Extreme wanderlust - check. The most comforting aspect of reading this book is the sense of normalcy that it brings to my upbringing. I'm certainly not the only child that grew up all over the place, and I feel better equipped to describe my experiences and how they have colored the way I treat people and my worldview.
December 8, 2015
This was a stellar read on the challenges and benefits specific to the TCK (Third Culture Kid) and ATCK (Adult-TCK) lifestyle. Some sections were obvious for a TCK who is now an ATCK (moi), and gave generic advice for raising TCKs that any child should benefit from (stability in the form of generous doses of love, advance information and preparation for major transitions and family decisions, et al).
David C. Pollock, the founder of Global Nomads and a number of related TCK organizations, first published his book in 1999 under a different title. He re-wrote subsequent editions with co-authors, including the most recent edition I read with Ruth E. Van Reken at the helm, published in 2009 after Pollock's death two years prior. Although his studies and this book mainly speak to TCKs, they also cover CCKs (Cross-Cultural Kids), and "domestic" CCKs, who have mixed heritage and/or move often domestically within the same states, namely the United States. The book focused much energy on TCKs from missionary families and recommended cultivating spirituality in the lives of all TCKs, which makes sense given Pollock's religious background.
Since publication, the field of TCK research and sheer numbers of TCKs and CCKs has grown substantially. What I find most beautiful and haunting about this fact is that the worldview of TCKs is humanitarian; less formed on a single ethnicity or nation-state; more often on a set of individually selected values. This is why being American is so beautiful and haunting to me: the only nation on earth to be established upon an ideal, must also evolve within a constantly evolving world. A nation of idealists is indeed the only nation that will continue to survive in spite of millennia of hegemonic history showing the contrary, because it imbues its citizens to strive beyond the predictable pattern of history, and bravely into the frontier of the unknown, self-actualized future. It is this similar mindset TCKs are imbued with; the confidence to navigate the world and unite people under values, not ethnicity.
Related to this patriotic philosophical tangent and my own perhaps slightly biased worldview as an ATCK, I find studying this group to be pertinent to future public policy development, public service recruitment, civil engagement and international relations. For an evolving world, a country with an ideal at the helm will remain at the helm if it learns how to harness this strength properly, and channel it to the world as an effective and irresistible ideology.
David C. Pollock, the founder of Global Nomads and a number of related TCK organizations, first published his book in 1999 under a different title. He re-wrote subsequent editions with co-authors, including the most recent edition I read with Ruth E. Van Reken at the helm, published in 2009 after Pollock's death two years prior. Although his studies and this book mainly speak to TCKs, they also cover CCKs (Cross-Cultural Kids), and "domestic" CCKs, who have mixed heritage and/or move often domestically within the same states, namely the United States. The book focused much energy on TCKs from missionary families and recommended cultivating spirituality in the lives of all TCKs, which makes sense given Pollock's religious background.
Since publication, the field of TCK research and sheer numbers of TCKs and CCKs has grown substantially. What I find most beautiful and haunting about this fact is that the worldview of TCKs is humanitarian; less formed on a single ethnicity or nation-state; more often on a set of individually selected values. This is why being American is so beautiful and haunting to me: the only nation on earth to be established upon an ideal, must also evolve within a constantly evolving world. A nation of idealists is indeed the only nation that will continue to survive in spite of millennia of hegemonic history showing the contrary, because it imbues its citizens to strive beyond the predictable pattern of history, and bravely into the frontier of the unknown, self-actualized future. It is this similar mindset TCKs are imbued with; the confidence to navigate the world and unite people under values, not ethnicity.
Related to this patriotic philosophical tangent and my own perhaps slightly biased worldview as an ATCK, I find studying this group to be pertinent to future public policy development, public service recruitment, civil engagement and international relations. For an evolving world, a country with an ideal at the helm will remain at the helm if it learns how to harness this strength properly, and channel it to the world as an effective and irresistible ideology.
April 21, 2012
This is a book that has been on my "to-read" list for several years and I finally read it during our vacation to Zanzibar.
Third Culture Kids (TCK) is a must-read for parents, extended-family and supporters of kids who grow up in foreign countries or cultures in my opinion. The basic premise of the book is that kids who grow up in a different country (like our kids!) end up learning from both home and host cultures and yet never fully becoming part of either one. TCKs and Adults TCKs (ATCKs) have unique advantages and disadvantages. They innately understand differences between places and cultures in a way that kids who grew up in one place simply cannot. They also have unique skills in adaptation, relationship-development and language. On the other hand, TCKs and ATCKs also typically struggle with issues of identity, unresolved grief, restlessness and rootlessness.
Overall, the book is engaging and well written. Pollock, who has been working with TCKs for over 30 years, uses many stories from TCKs who he has met at the TCK conferences that he runs. The first part of the book deals with his theories related to the unique experiences, advantages and disadvantages of growing up as a TCK. The second part of the book gives practical suggestions for both TCKs and their parents, extended family and supporters on how they can help TCKs to harvest the benefits of TCK life while avoiding pitfalls. I particularly liked the sections related to how to depart and return from periods lived in foreign countries in such a way as to bring closure and avoid unresolved grief.
I will definitely recommend this as a book to read before departure for anyone planning to move to a foreign country with their children.
Third Culture Kids (TCK) is a must-read for parents, extended-family and supporters of kids who grow up in foreign countries or cultures in my opinion. The basic premise of the book is that kids who grow up in a different country (like our kids!) end up learning from both home and host cultures and yet never fully becoming part of either one. TCKs and Adults TCKs (ATCKs) have unique advantages and disadvantages. They innately understand differences between places and cultures in a way that kids who grew up in one place simply cannot. They also have unique skills in adaptation, relationship-development and language. On the other hand, TCKs and ATCKs also typically struggle with issues of identity, unresolved grief, restlessness and rootlessness.
Overall, the book is engaging and well written. Pollock, who has been working with TCKs for over 30 years, uses many stories from TCKs who he has met at the TCK conferences that he runs. The first part of the book deals with his theories related to the unique experiences, advantages and disadvantages of growing up as a TCK. The second part of the book gives practical suggestions for both TCKs and their parents, extended family and supporters on how they can help TCKs to harvest the benefits of TCK life while avoiding pitfalls. I particularly liked the sections related to how to depart and return from periods lived in foreign countries in such a way as to bring closure and avoid unresolved grief.
I will definitely recommend this as a book to read before departure for anyone planning to move to a foreign country with their children.
September 21, 2020
I found this and incredibly tedious read, and was honestly pretty bored throughout, which, as someone who has lived in four countries and is raising mixed-race children outside of our passport country, is a shame, because I really wanted to like it. The authors seem to obsessed with fixing labels to people and their experiences, creating diagrams and charts that state the bloody obvious, describing them in such enthusiastic terms that you would think they’ve found the meaning of life. It’s academic study for the sake of it.
I also found it pretty negative, talking a lot about all the losses you experience as a TCK while glossing over the gains.
Unfortunately, the book can be summed up by a quote from Dave Pollock “I’m likely not going to tell you something you don’t know, but you just don’t know that you know it yet”. Otherwise known as writing a really long book about not very much at all.
If, by some miracle, you still want to read it, focus on the section on the transition experience itself, where there was some useful info (the only reason the book earned 1 star)
I also found it pretty negative, talking a lot about all the losses you experience as a TCK while glossing over the gains.
Unfortunately, the book can be summed up by a quote from Dave Pollock “I’m likely not going to tell you something you don’t know, but you just don’t know that you know it yet”. Otherwise known as writing a really long book about not very much at all.
If, by some miracle, you still want to read it, focus on the section on the transition experience itself, where there was some useful info (the only reason the book earned 1 star)
June 6, 2014
I borrowed this book a few months ago to help create my personal project. Although I didn't actually read through it until recently, I was pleasantly surprised to find that it is full of content that I can personally relate to. If you attend an international school, chances are you will also relate to this. This is great for adults who work with kids living abroad to get a glimpse of what life is like. What a great feeling it is to read something that explains so many of my experiences to me. And what a weird feeling it is to identify with the Third Culture Kid profile. That being said, people should approach this book like a textbook because it does get repetitive. I would read in sections, snippets that appeal to you. It is brilliantly formatted. I can only recommend this to anyone and everyone who has spent time growing up abroad or is currently doing so.
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