First Comes Love: Finding Your Family in the Church and the Trinity

by Scott Hahn

Scott Hahn has the rare ability to explain the essential teachings of Catholicism in a totally accessible manner. Rather than burdening the reader with difficult or arcane references and arguments, he writes of familiar feelings and situations and allows the theology to unfold naturally. In First Comes Love, Hahn turns his attention to the search for a sense of belonging, revealing the intimate connection between the families men and women create on earth and the divine family, the Holy Trinity.

Delving into the Gospels, Hahn shows that family terminology--words like brother, sister, mother, father, and home--dominates Jesus' speech and the writings of His first followers, and that these very words illuminate Christianity's central ideas. As he explores the fatherhood of God, the marriage of the Church to Christ, and the all-enveloping role of the Holy Spirit, Hahn deepens readers' understanding of the sacraments, teaches them how to create a family life in the image of the Trinity, and demonstrates the ways in which the analogy of the family applies to every aspect of Catholicism and its practices--from the role of "father" embodied by the ancient patriarchs and contemporary parish priests, to the comfort and guidance offered by the brothers and sisters who comprise the Communion of Saints, to the nurturing embrace of Mary, the mother of all Christians.

Through real-life examples (both humorous and compassionate) and quotations drawn from the Scriptures, Hahn makes it clear that no matter what sort of family readers come from--no matter what sort of "dysfunction" they have experienced--they can find a family in the Church. Reaching out to newcomers and to lifelong Christians alike, First Comes Love is an invitation to discover a true home in the divine.

Genres: Catholic, Religion, Theology, Nonfiction, Christian, Christianity, Spirituality

224 pages, Paperback

Published September 19, 2006

About the author

Scott Hahn is a renowned Catholic theologian, apologist, speaker, and bestselling author whose work has had a profound impact on contemporary biblical theology and Catholic thought. A former Presbyterian minister, Hahn converted to Catholicism in 1986 after an intense personal and theological journey, which he details in his popular book Rome Sweet Home, co-written with his wife, Kimberly Hahn. Their story of conversion has inspired countless readers around the world and remains a landmark in modern Catholic apologetics.
Hahn holds the Father Michael Scanlan Chair of Biblical Theology and the New Evangelization at the Franciscan University of Steubenville, where he has taught since 1990. He is also the founder and president of the St. Paul Center for Biblical Theology, a non-profit organization dedicated to promoting biblical literacy among the laity and biblical fluency among clergy. Through the Center, Hahn leads a wide range of initiatives, including publications, pilgrimages, Bible studies, and the scholarly journal Letter and Spirit.
Educated at Grove City College (B.A.), Gordon–Conwell Theological Seminary (M.Div.), and Marquette University (Ph.D. in Systematic Theology), Hahn brings a deep academic foundation to his work. His dissertation, Kinship by Covenant, was later published by Yale University Press and received praise for its theological insight and scholarly rigor.
Throughout his career, Hahn has emphasized the covenant as the key to understanding salvation history, showing how the biblical narrative reveals a divine plan that unites all of humanity into God's family. His works explore themes such as the Eucharist, the role of Mary, the sacraments, and the authority of the Church, often drawing on the writings of the early Church Fathers to bridge the ancient faith with modern understanding.
He is the author or editor of over forty books, including The Lamb’s Supper, Hail, Holy Queen, First Comes Love, Letter and Spirit, Swear to God, Reasons to Believe, The Creed, The Fourth Cup, and Holy Is His Name. Many of his books have become staples in Catholic households, study groups, and seminaries.
In addition to his writing, Hahn is a highly sought-after speaker, having delivered thousands of lectures across the United States and abroad. He appears regularly on EWTN and has collaborated with Lighthouse Catholic Media to bring his teachings to an even broader audience.
Scott Hahn lives in Ohio with his wife Kimberly. They have six children and numerous grandchildren. Together, the Hahns continue to lead efforts in evangelization and Catholic education, embodying a lifelong commitment to deepening faith and understanding through Scripture and tradition.

Reviews

[Deacon Tom (Feeling Better) · Rating 3 out of 5]

A fundamental primer on Christianity while leaning towards Roman Catholic theology.

The best contribution is the apologies to family as a way of understanding God, especially Jesus.

A good book.

[Monica Aho · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've read several of Scott Hahn's books, and I always come away with a greater understanding of something profound. This one, I think, is the best so far. Here, he uses everyday language to discuss the Holy Trinity, and how God Himself is reflected in our human families. This gave me new insight on how sacred the family bond really is, as it is, (as humans themselves are), created in God's image. I never thought about how God is not a lonley individual, but essentially a family unit, with a Father and a Son, and the love that pours from them as the Holy Spirit (which, he explains, is not feminine but has a maternal role in regards to the human race... guiding, leading, teaching us to say our Father's name, even giving birth when we are "born of the spirit"). Brilliant, yet easily understandable. I highly recommend this book!!!

[Talea · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a good thing I waited until I wasn’t as hurt over my failed marriage to read this one. I almost didn’t even now. There is healing a truth in this book that helped me and renewed a little of what I’d lost. I highly recommend this one for everyone, married or single. Just know if your marriage has failed this could be painful to read right away. Once the raw feelings have subsided some, then come back to it. The thing I came back with is learning about how very much God loves us all, unconditionally. His very nature is family oriented and that is comforting. I may not have a husband by my side any longer, but I have a God that is right by me, who has never left me. He never will.

[Krys · Rating 5 out of 5]

First read for my MATCM degree :)

[Stuart · Rating 5 out of 5]

First Comes Love is a book about family, but not family in the way that the world thinks of it. Instead, it focuses on the Trinity and the Church. If we look at the Gospels, we can see that Jesus used familial terms a lot. He even went so far as to say that his family wasn't his mother, brothers, and sisters, but those who do the will of God. Dr. Hahn touches on this theme and more in this book.

The book starts off with a personal love story from Dr. Hahn. He talks about how he met his future wife Kimberly, and it was basically love at first sight. He compares the love he felt to the love Adam must have felt for Eve, and explains that man is made for woman and vice versa. He then continues his personal story of love begetting more love with the pregnancy of their first child. However, something went wrong with the labor, and she had to have an emergency C-Section. It was a success and both mom and baby were okay, but it definitely made Dr. Hahn look at his wife in a new and more beautiful way.

The rest of the book explains who God is and what the Church is. God is Family, Covenant, and Love. God also became man for us. He also explains Trinitarian theology in simple terms, and how the Catholic Church is like a home and family. My favorite section was actually the appendix, which discusses the Holy Spirit. St. Maximilian Kolbe said, The Holy Spirit is the uncreated Immaculate Conception." It was also interesting to read about the concept of bridal-maternity of the Holy Spirit. However, this doesn't mean we should refer to God as "mother" or that the Godhead has gender at all. "God created the human forms of physical gender and sexuality to be created reflections of the purely immaterial relations unique to each member of the Trinity." That's a lot to grasp, but makes sense the more you reflect on it. If you are looking to better understand the role of family in the Trinity and the Church, then this is the book for you.

[Emilia P · Rating 4 out of 5]

So Scottie. We meet for the first time. I am not a fan of your punny titles. I am a fan of your unabashed Bible and Catechism quoting!

So basically the best thing about Scott Hahn is that he reads like a really good homily - he raises as many questions as he answers. This can also be sort of a downside. He talks about how Jesus came along and changed and the notion of the trustee family in the society, and about how the Trinity is the model for the family. Which means he gets into all the Jesus and God the Father are the parents of the Holy Spirit, the Holy Spirit is like the Mother in the Trinity family and so on and so forth. That stuff sort of weirds me out be he makes a good point - these relationships are relational and familial, not physical or sexual. I will try to buy it, but we have to talk about it in human language and it makes it weird.

So then, I guess, his point is that human relationships (marriages and families in particular) are a reflection of the divine love and indivisibility of the Trinity. And that is why they are so great, and why we have to be careful and thoughtful about them! But oh man, that is a tall order. I know that it is important to try to live by God's example, but you also gotta be a person in the world! That is any religous person's struggle, I suppose, and that why it's like a good homily - lots of room to think, not a lot of practical anecdotal stuff.

What there was was great - Hahn realizing what love of God was like when he could do nothing but adore his baby who had just thrown up on him - that made me cry on the bus. Yay!

[Philip Cooper · Rating 4 out of 5]

While I do not agree with the Catholic theology of this author in this book, it does provide an interesting look into the mindest of those who are true believers in the Chatholic faith.

[Gigi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love Scott Hahn!

[Pablo Sotomayor · Rating 4 out of 5]

Scott Hahn hace un estudio sobre la Santísima Trinidad realmente original. Muy apegado a las Escrituras y con una pedagogía fabulosa.

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

First of all, this book took me months to read. It isn't the type of book that you read cover to cover. Anytime that I was stuck somewhere with this as my only reading material and I attempted to read it that way, I always had to come back later to reread. There were times in this book that I was like, "Okay, I get it. You are just repeating yourself but saying it a little bit different." When I read it in chapter-size pieces, it got much more out of it. The book involves (at least for me) a lot of rereading and stopping to think. Often I would ask myself, "Do I believe this?" or "Is this really what that Scripture meant?" In general, the ideas are old...ancient, in fact, (LOL) but are timeless. Good friends read this book aloud as a family. I think that would be a great way to read and discuss this book.

[Christopher Hunt · Rating 3 out of 5]

I understood this was a book about marriage, but it really wasn’t. After the first few chapters I nearly put it down, but ended up deciding to finish it. I found it to be about as deep as a puddle, and lacked engaging material. That said, some of what he wrote (or was it Mike Aquilina? I am told he is the author of most books with Mr. Hahn’s signature...) was worthy of contemplation.

It is a good book for your kids in Jr. High. There is a lot of intrinsic “proofs” of the fact that the Catholic Church is the one, true Church. In that aspect, I found it fruitful. It is a good reinforcement for your kids to remain within Holy Mother Church.

I recommend the book for young teens and/or tweens.

[Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Scott Hahn? Theological. Ninja. I know it's not even July yet, but this is the best book I've read so far this summer. It's no wonder Cardinal Leveda recently compared Scott Hahn to CS Lewis. As for this book, I'll let another Catholic rock star give the plug:

"Hahn reflects simply yet profoundly on the nitty-gritty of life, love, relationships, marriage, and family in the context of the bedrock doctrines of Christian faith. This book is full of good news and solid answers to life's tough questions." ~Archbishop Charles Chaput

[Grace · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is a bit more theologically deep than many of Hahn's other books. They're all deep, but this one delves into the innermost mysteries of the Trinity, which can be much more abstract than, say, a typological comparison of the Last Supper and the Passover. It's definitely worth reading, but if you're new to Scott Hahn's work or to Christian theology, you might want to try something a little more "down to earth" first, like Rome Sweet Home, Signs of Life, or The Lamb's Supper.

[Chad Judice · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Catholic Family is truly the model of the Blessed Trinity and is a physical symbol to all who witness the sacrificial love of being both a spouse and parent. The two hardest things I have ever done in my life are to be a parent and a husband. Scott Hahn clearly illustrates how sacrificial love for the benefit of the other within the family is a model of 1 John 4:8 "Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love."

[Ht El · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eases people with even the most prickly of demeanors when it comes to religion. A thorough, beautifully written explanation of the Catholic Church and the Holy Trinity. New Evangelization for Catholics who don't know their faith as well as they would want to or a schooling for those Catholics who assume that they know enough. And it is the electricity that turns on the light for those who don't believe. It almost reads like a beautiful painting put into text.

[Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

The thing about books by Scott Hahn is that the title isn't as informative as you would think. This book is about understanding the Trinity as a family. In the same way earthly marriage teaches us about how God loves his church, Family life teaches us about the Trinity. I enjoyed his explanations of how family was viewed in biblical times and how that ties into our understanding of God and the New Covenant. There were a few parts that got kind of boring, but over all I liked this book.

[Donna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Our relationship with God is based on the family. The Church reflects the family. Once we understand how fundamental the family is to our relationship with the Holy Trinity, we come to understand how the family must be protected and not redefined by politicians. We, as a country, must recognize the importance of respect for the family and for the Church.

[Don · Rating 5 out of 5]

extended mind games, as brothers and sisters, man animated by breath and spirit of god, fear of Lord or pride, perfect love and justice, die death include virtue, choose gifts over giver settles for too little, strive more perfect, wisdom in friendship pure delight, knowledge and loving, spirit of truth as Holy Spirit, help others grow in happiness in self-giving.

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Scott Hahn never disappoints! This book examined the life of the family as reflection of the Life of the Trinity. Dr. Hahn has the ability to take difficult concepts and explain them in terms that are easier to understand. He has quite a gift.

[Sherri · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really loved this book, got more out of it than I had anticipated I would.

[Tiffanie]

I love this book.. and Scott Hahn as a writter

[April · Rating 5 out of 5]

As usual, Scott Hahn wrote a wonderful book. :)

[John Poston · Rating 3 out of 5]

Provides amazing insights into the house of God, especially in the context of a family!

[Eustis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome book! Very revealing.

[нєνєℓ ¢ανα · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent!

[Hilary De · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book shortly before getting married and loved it.

[Sydney Forrey · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a book! I have some things I wanted to share that I loved:

- “Yet it seems that God built us all to live in a much larger family, to experience a much larger love…. a love that extends infinitely.” (Page 24)
- “Once He has revealed Himself, then matters become clearer.” (Page52)
- “Creation in its fullness includes a moment at which nature dies to itself and roses again, at which first movement of life flows back upon its source and rises again.” (Page 75)
- “This meal is unmistakably the Real Presence of Jesus Christ: Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity.” (Page 91)
- “It is the Blessed Virgin, then, who opens our view onto the eternal life of the Spirit——even as she manifests the Body to which the Spirit gives life: the Church.” (Page 137)
- “Appropriately enough,we can discern three stages in our Christian life: vocation, probation, and oblation——God’s call,our response, and our offering. (Page 156)

Overall this book opened up really well what the church believes, I loved the great use of Scripture and quotes from Saints! ✔️🩷

[Amanda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Scott Hahn always does a good job explaining the Catholic faith, even if for me it goes over my head sometimes. I think I found this book of his to be the most understandable. It stretched my mind, but on a few things, my mind still needs to wrap around the new ideas he presented to me. There are a few things about the Holy Spirit that I cannot quite grasp, and Hahn is not alone in telling me these things.

[Tracy L. · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. The way that Scott Hahn explains the Trinity is a way I have never heard before. It makes perfect sense, and helps me to have a better understanding and appreciation of Catholicism. How we need to be justified, sanctified, the law, love, and to be fathered and mothered. Thank you for putting it in layman’s terms. Theology is confusing to the average person. In explaining the Trinity in the simplest of ways, thank you.

[Deborah Eater · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everyone knows what the Catholic Church teaches about marriage -- especially about what it prohibits (birth control, divorce) -- but how many have any idea why? This book provides a theological background for Catholic teaching on marriage, not just as an isolated topic but in relation to the whole mystery of God. Hahn delivers profound theological insights in an engaging and approachable manner.